Retro Television Reviews: T and T 2.1 through 2.4 “Straight Line”

Posted on November 10, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on Tubi!

This week, season 2 begins with a supesized episode.

Episodes 2.1 through 2.4 “Straight Line”

(Dir by George Mihalka, originally aired on October 24, 1988)

Straight Line, the second season premiere of T & T, is one story that is told over the course of four, 30-minute episodes. According to both Wikipedia and the IMDb, all four of those episodes aired on October 24th, 1988. To me, that would seem to suggest that Straight Line originally aired as a made-for-TV movie and that it was later split up into four episodes for syndication. It’s something that happens with a lot of shows, especially when it comes to season premieres. Straight Line was also apparently released, direct to video, as a stand-alone film in 1990 and you have to wonder how many people ended up renting it without realizing that they were spending their money on a super-sized episode of T & T.

The second season begins with some changes to the opening credits. Most of the supporting cast — including Decker, Aunt Martha, Sophie, and Detective Jones — no longer appear in the opening credits. (Decker and Aunt Martha do appear in the episodes but both David Nerman and Jackie Richardson are credited as being “guest stars.”) Instead, it appears that there are now only three regular members of the cast — Mr. T, Alex Amini, and Sean Roberge as a new character named Joe Casper. (Roberge previously appeared during the first season, playing a character named Fabian.)

Joe Casper is a teenager who is in a bit of trouble. He’s gotten involved with a neighborhood gang known as The Future and when the Future disrupts a campaign event for a reverend who is seeking to become Toronto’s first black mayor, it leads to a bomb going off and killing Joe’s mother. Distraught by what’s happened, Joe attempts to jump off a bridge but T.S. Turner (who was at the rally) approaches Joe and says, “Take it easy, little brother,” and that’s all Joe needs to hear to turn himself into the police. Joe is going to need a good lawyer so T.S. calls Amy, who rushes over the police station and….

OH MY GOD, WHAT IS AMY WEARING!?

Amy explains that she was at a banquet when T.S. called but still, I would probably put on a coat or something before heading over to Toronto’s dirtiest police station.

Anyway, Amy is able to keep Joe out of jail. Joe is sent to a juvenile rehabilitation center that is run by Dr. Hammel (Kenneth Welsh). Dr. Hammel is an ally of the preacher who is running for mayor and everyone thinks that Dr. Hammel is a good and devoted social activist. Of course, the audience automatically knows that Dr. Hammel is the bad guy because he’s played by Kenneth Welsh, who I imagine is best-known in America for playing the totally evil Windom Earle in Twin Peaks.

T.S. investigates The Future and discovers that there started out as a neighborhood watch before being transformed into a bunch of Neo-Nazis. He also discovers that Dr. Hammel is the one who is behind the organization. T.S. and Amy have to expose Hammel and they better hurry because the preacher running for mayor has been assassinated and Hammel has just announced that he’s running for mayor of Toronto!

This all may sound pretty exciting but the second season premiere is actually a bit dull. The main problem is that, as opposed to the first season, T.S. doesn’t get to do much in the episode. He’s rather subdued and there’s none of the quirkiness that made the character so memorable during the first season. He doesn’t talk about his love for cookies. He hardly calls anyone, other than Joe, “brother.” There’s not even a scene of him hitting a punching bag. It’s disappointing! As well, he and Amy were separated for the majority of the show, which kind of goes against the whole idea of them being T and T. Instead, the majority of the episode was devoted to introducing Joe. The episode ended with Joe, tears streaming down his face, walking away with T.S. and apparently renouncing his former affiliation with The Future. Since Joe is in the opening credits now, I assume he’s going to become T.S.’s ward for at least the next few episodes.

Hopefully, the next episode will features T.S. acting more like T.S. Otherwise, this is going to be a long season.

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.22 “Mickey’s Choice”

Posted on October 27, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

In this episode, a spoiled little brat discover that …. well, no. I should let Mr. T tell you.

Episode 1.22 “Mickey’s Choice”

(Dir by Donald Shebib, originally aired on June 6th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “a street-smart kid finds out he’s still got a few lessons to learn!”

On the mean and cold streets of Canada, Rubberhead (John Matuszak) sends 13 year-old Mickey (Jamie Shannon) on a mission to pick the pockets of the Canadians who have gathered to watch a street magician. When the police nab Mickey, Rubberheard snarls, “Don’t talk, you little punk!” before walking away.

Because Amy Taler is the only defense attorney in Canada, she gets assigned to Mickey’s case. The prosecution wants to toss Mickey in juvenile hall but Amy argues that Mickey is too young for that. Rubberhead and one of his henchmen walk into the courtroom and are properly thrown out by the judge. Mickey gives them the thumbs up signal as they leave. My question is how has Rubberhead not been arrested as he seems to have absolutely no idea how to subtle about carrying out his criminal activities. Also, why is he called Rubberhed? Is that a nickname he wanted?

Rather then send Mickey into the system, Amy arranges for Mickey to be released into the custody of T.S. Turner. Amy is able to pull this off despite the fact that Turner is an ex-con, her hair is a mess, and Turner is late coming to court. Luckily, the judge is a fan of boxing and he decides that Turner’s former career as a boxer is the perfect justification for giving him custody of a rebellious 13 year-old.

As Turner, Amy, and Mickey leave the courthouse, they are confronted by Rubberhead and his gang. One of them tries to grab Amy.

“Excuse me, brother,” Turner says, “that’s no way to treat a lady.”

Taking advantage of the distraction, Mickey runs for it. After telling Rubberhead, “I’ll deal with you later, punk,” Turner takes off after him.

Fortunately, Turner is able to grab Mickey and drop him off with Aunt Martha (Jackie Richardson) and Renee (Rachael Crawford). Aunt Martha puts Mickey to work peeling potatoes. Turner then heads out to try to track down Rubberhead and his gang.

“When I was younger, I was Mickey,” Turner explains, “I broke my mother’s heart!”

However, despite saying that he’s going to go out and find Rubberhead, the next scene finds Turner having dinner with Mickey, Aunt Martha, and Renee. Turner leads the group in saying grace and even Mickey bows his head.

That night, Rubberhead leaves a bag of burning trash on Aunt Martha’s porch. While Turner is distracted by the fire, Rubberhead breaks into the house and grabs Mickey. Back at Rubberhead’s headquarters, Mickey brags about how tough he is until Rubberhead demands to know what he told the police.

We then cut to Turner asking various Canadians if they’ve seen Mickey. “Look, brother,” Turner says at one point, “I’ve asked politely and I’ve asked nicely. Now, I’m just asking.” Frustrated by one dead end after another, Turner goes to the gym and lifts weights for several minutes.

“That’s how he thinks,” gym owner Decker explains as Turner shouts, “MORE WEIGHT!”

Somehow, all of this weight lifting leads to Turner figuring out where Rubberhead is headquartered. Turner heads down to Rubberhead’s warehouse, where he is promptly captured and tied to a chair by Rubberhead’s gang. Rubberhead announces that both Turner and Mickey will be dropped down an elevator shaft.

“You gotta make a choice, Mickey,” Turner says, “Right or wrong.”

Mickey unties Turner and Turner tosses a motorcycle at Rubberhead, taking out both him and his gang. Turner and Mickey then rush to the courthouse, where Amy has been stalling a court hearing on Mickey’s future. Mickey reveals all that he knows about Rubberhead and his gang. SNITCH!

This is definitely an episode that suffered from trying to tell a 60-minute story in only 30. Seriously, the narrative jumped around so much and was so haphazardly edited that it was a struggle to keep track of what was going on. That said, Canada is a safer place thanks to T.S. Turner and that’s the important thing. That’s why they put their faith in him.

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.19 “Special Delivery” and 1.20 “Pros and Cons”

Posted on October 13, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, T.S. and Amy continue to keep Canada safe.

Episode 1.19 “Special Delivery”

(Dir by Vic Sarin, originally aired on May 15th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us during the pre-credits preview, “a young boy’s on the run with only his fears and a mysterious package for company.”

Bruce Johnson (Robert McClure) is an old friend of T.S. Turner’s who is now working as an executive for the Canadian space program. He records a tape in which he tells T.S. that he suspects that someone is trying to sabotage Canada’s latest space rocket and that his life in danger. “If anything happens to me,” Bruce asks, “take care of David and Brenda.” Bruce leaves his office with a package of evidence. He finds his 12 year-old son, David (Jamie Dick) skateboarding in front of a school. He gives the package to David and tells him to deliver it to Decker’s gym. David wears his baseball cap backwards so we all know he’s a rebel. Bruce is nabbed by the police as soon as he gives David the package but, fortunately, David is able to roll away on his skateboard.

With her husband and son both missing, Brenda Johnson (Karen Woolridge) calls T.S. Turner at Amy’s law office. Turner is out but the spacey administrative assistant, Sophie (Catherine Disher), takes the message and then runs down to the courthouse to give it to Amy. As someone who has worked as an administrative assistant, Sophie’s unprofessionalism made me cringe. How can Amy run her law office if the office is so disorganized? I’m surprised T.S. puts up with it.

Amy heads down to the police station, where she discovers that Brenda is being held as a witness in a federal investigation that’s being headed up by Detective Williams (William Finlay), who is a part of the Canadian Bureau of Investigation. Williams asks Amy where Bruce and David are and Amy tells him that Brenda has “civil rights.”

“Civil rights are superseded in matters of treason,” William replies.

Amy threatens to call a press conference so Williams agrees to let Brenda go free. Wow, that was easy!

10 minutes into this episode, T.S. finally shows up. He and Amy get a hot dog on a city street. “Thanks, brother,” T.S. tells the hot dog vendor. Amy fills T.S. in on what’s happening. T.S. suggests that Amy head to the gym while T.S. searches the city. Meanwhile, mysterious men in gray suits watch their every move.

Meanwhile, David continue to ride his skateboard through the city. He gets chased by the cops at one point and has to run through an office building to escape. Seriously, how big is this city? The kid just had to go to the gym!

Finally, 15 minutes into this 23-minute episode, David reaches the gym. However, he can’t go into the gym because the feds are staking it out! So, he just stands around outside with his hands in his pockets. T.S. shows up at the gym and announces, “The Kid’s not going to show up here with federal agents outside!”

After putting on camouflage gear, T.S. grabs Decker and heads back to the office. (Amy stays at the gym.) While Sophie flirts with Decker, T.S. calls the gym and tells Amy that David is at the office. T.S. knows the lines are bugged so this is his clever plan to throw off the feds. And it works! As Amy and Agent Williams head to the law office, Decker and T.S. head back to the gym.

And yes! David is now in the gym. He gives T.S. the package.

“Hey, little brother,” T.S. says, “everything’s going to be alright.”

Suddenly, a random bad guy shows up in the gym, holding a gun. He demands the package and promises no one will get hurt.

“Someone sticks a gun in my face, that don’t exactly inspire confidence!” T.S. explains.

T.S. then punches the guy out. One scene later, a news reporter informs us that Bruce Johnson has been found alive so I guess that’s the end of that.

This was a weird episode. For all the talk of international intrigue and Canada’s space program, the majority of it was just filler footage of the kid rolling around on his skateboard. T.S. was barely in it, leading me to suspect that maybe Mr. T had some vacation time and wanted to leave early. Either way, at least Canada’s space program was saved.

Episode 1.20 “Pros and Cons”

(Dir by Don McCutcheon, originally aired on May 23rd, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T says, “some high-rolling crooks make a very big mistake when they pick on my Aunt Martha.”

Two con artists — Harry (Booth Savage) and Louise (Janet-Laine Green) — pretend to be members of law enforcement and trick T.S.’s Aunt Martha into withdrawing a good deal of money from the bank. Martha thinks that she’s helping them catch a criminal but actually, she’s just given up her hard-earned money. T.S. isn’t going to stand for that! However, Martha doesn’t want to tell T.S., even though T.S.’s nice, Renee (Rachael Crawford) thinks that she should.

So, Renee decides to investigate on her own. After rather easily stealing a book of mugshots from the police station, Renee shows it to Aunt Martha, who immediately identifies Harry and Louise. By running a fake credit check on Louise, Renee and Aunt Martha are able to track them down to a ritzy hotel. Renee dresses up like a maid and Aunt Martha dresses up like a rich guest and they infiltrate the hotel.

Meanwhile, T.S. is shocked to discover that a check that he wrote to fix his car has bounced.

“Why would it do that!?” T.S. demands.

T.S. and Amy go to Aunt Martha’s and find all of Renee and Martha’s notes. Realizing that the two of them are confronting the con artists at the hotel, T.S. and Amy arrive just in time to see Harry and Louise trying to run from the hotel. T.S. blocks Harry’s escape. Harry grabs a mop and points it at T.S.

“Ain’t no way, brother,” T.S. replies.

T.S. subdues Harry by tossing him over a railing (don’t worry, Harry lands on a table) and Aunt Jackie punches out Louise.

The problem here is pretty obvious. The name of the show is T and T, not Renee and Jackie. The fun thing about this show is listening to T.S. growl at the criminals. This episode pushed both Amy and T.S. to the side and, as such, it just wasn’t that much fun. Sorry, Aunt Jackie!

Retro Television Reviews: T. and T. 1.15 “Sophie a La Modem” and 1.16 “Black and White”

Posted on September 29, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Amy’s psycho nephew shows up!

Episode 1.15 “Sophie a La Modem”

(Dir by Stan Olsen, originally aired on April 18th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Sophie goes AWOL with Amy’s nephew and no one is safe from him …. NO ONE!”

This episode focuses on Sophie (Catherine Disher), who is Amy and T.S.’s administrative assistant. Since my first job out of college was working as an administrative assistant to an attorney, I appreciated that Sophie finally got to be the focus of an episode. Seriously, you can’t have an office without an office manager.

Amy’s nephew (Sunny Besen Thrasher) — who T.S. refers to as being “that little bad kid, Donald!” — is at the courthouse, firing a water gun at the security guard. Amy and T.S. take him to the office, where Sophie is extremely happy because she’s purchased — 80s alert! — a new modem! Donald, who is way too obsessed with guns, fires a rubber dart at Sophie’s computer screen. How big of a brat is Donald? He ever wears a bow-tie, just like the problem child kid. (Remember him?)

T.S. and Amy have to go to court so they’re not at the office when Mrs. Williams (Ruth Springfield) shows up and says that the people to whom she’s rented a house appear to be building something in the basement. Donald tells the woman that Sophie is Amy and somehow, this leads to Sophie and that little bad kid Donald going to investigate on their own.

Back at the office, T.S. and Amy return and discover that Sophie and Donald are gone but they don’t seem to be too worried about it. Instead of wondering where their administrative assistant and the little kid have gone, they talk about the time that Donald put a mouse in T.S.’s cookie jar. “He’s a bad kid,” T.S. growls.

At the house, Amy and Donald meet the two tenants, Gord (Ron Gabriel) and his slow-witted associate, Benny (Richard Donat). They also sneak into the basement and discover, as Sophie puts it, “a computer and a modem!” It turns out that Gord and Benny are using the magic powers of the modem to hack into bank databases. Unfortunately, Gord and Benny catch Sophie and that bad kid in the basement. Uh-oh!

Back at the office, T.S. speculates that Donald probably abandoned Sophie somewhere in Toronto and then stole her car. Instead of heading out to try to find the missing child and the administrative assistant, T.S. heads to the gym. I guess T.S. really does not like Donald!

Gord and Benny attempt to lock Sophie, Donald, and their landlady up in a crude cell they’ve constructed in the basement. Fortunately, Donald still has his toy dart gun and, by attaching a string to the dart, Sophie is able to snag the key to the cell. After unlocking and opening the cell door, Sophie turns on the computer and uses the magic powers of the modem to send a message to Amy, letting her know that they are being held prisoner in the basement.

T.S. shows up at the house and bangs on the door. “LET ME IN!” he shouts. When Gord and Benny fail to do so, T.S. kicks the door open. “I SAID LET ME IN!” While Gord begs T.S. not to kill him, Sophie uses the dart gun to shoot a rubber dart at Benny. Gord passes out and T.S. throws Benny through a wall.

Yay! This was an incredibly silly episode but I enjoyed it because Sophie got to live every administrative assistant’s dream. She did a good job and so did this episode. It was fun.

Episode 1.16 “Black and White”

(Dir by Don McCutcheon, originally aired on April 25th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T. tells us, “Amy and I are caught in the middle when Detective Jones takes the law into his own hands.”

If the previous episode gave Sophie her chance in the spotlight, this episode spotlights Detective Jones (played by Ken James). Since the second episode, Detective Jones has been the detective with whom Amy and Turner always seem to end up interacting. He’s also the detective who arrested for T.S. for the crime that T.S. didn’t commit. Needless to say, their relationship is occasionally awkward but, all things considered, surprisingly friendly.

This episode opens with Detective Jones’s wife (Meredith McRae) coming across two teenage boys breaking into her house and getting knocked unconscious as result. Jones, who is out for revenge, thinks that one of the boys was Tom (Nicholas Shields), who is later arrested for another burglary and whose attorney is — you guessed it! — Amy Taler. It turns out that Tom was one of the two teens that broke into Jones’s house but he was not the one who hit Mrs. Jones. This is all something that Jones finds out after he follows Tom to the surprisingly large warehouse that is owned by Tom’s accomplice, the psychotic Len. Fortunately, T.S. also follows Jones to the warehouse and helps him to subdue Len. Tom is given a suspended sentence and Jones and his wife leave for a Miami vacation.

This is a good example of an episode that suffered due to T. and T. having to cram an hour’s worth of story into a 30-minute time slot. This episode certainly had the potential to be interesting, with Detective Jones turning into a vigilante and T.S. Turner sympathizing with Tom because of their shared background as foster children but, with the shortened running time, the whole thing was juts a bit too rushed to be effective.

Next week: T.S. Turner faces off against two rich kids who think that ruining someone else’s life is just a game!

Retro Television Reviews: T. and T. 1.13 “Sweet Tooth” and 1.14 “Playing With Fire”

Posted on September 22, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the adventures of T.S. Turner continue!

Episode 1.13 “Sweet Tooth”

(Dir by Don McCutcheon, originally aired on March 28th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “a former con man claims to be starting a new chapter in his life, but I keep hearing the same old story.”

At the Toronto courthouse, T.S. and Amy are approached by a prosecutor named Billings (David Ferry). He’s wearing a plaid suit, which is the show’s way of indicating that he’s not as good an attorney as Amy. Billings says that he needs to discuss a private matter with T.S.

“Maybe he wants fashion tips,” T.S. growls.

Billings explains to T.S. that a man with whom T.S. served time, a conman named Lee Boone, has been released from prison. The police think that Boone is trying to set up a new con in T.S.’s neighborhood but Billings thinks that Boone is trying to go straight. Billings asks T.S. to investigate. He also asks T.S. to keep their arrangement strictly confidential.

“And I’d appreciate it if you changed that jacket,” T.S. replies, “It gives me an earache.”

That said, T.S. agrees to check out Lee Boone, especially after he hears that Boone is the father of a seven year-old son.

Meanwhile, Lee Boone (Anthony Sherwood) is giving a speech in front of an old church. He’s asking for donations to turn the church into a community center. Among those donating money is T.S.’s aunt, Martha (Jackie Richardson). T.S is stunned to discover that Lee is the man who he knew in prison as “Sweet Tooth.” After Boone finishes his speech, T.S. confronts him and accuses him of trying to con people out of their money. Boone argues that he’s changed and he’s just trying to give back to the community. T.S. doesn’t buy it, later telling Billing that he judges a man not by his words but by his eyes and, “I looked in Sweet Tooth’s eyes and nothing had changed.”

On T.S.’s recommendation, Boone is arrested. Guess who is assigned to be Boone’s lawyer? Amy Taler! Now, considering that Amy is partners with someone who would undoubtedly be called as a witness if the case ever went to trial, this seems like a clear conflict of interest but maybe they do things different up in Canada. Amy is not only convinced that Boone is innocent but she’s also angry at T.S. for working with prosecutor’s office.

You know who else is angry with T.S.? Aunt Martha! Aunt Martha brings Boone’s 7 year-old son down to the gym and orders the kid to ask Turner, “Why did you put my Daddy in jail?”

“I wasn’t trying to hurt him, son,” T.S. says, “I was trying to help him.”

Aunt Martha announces that Lee Boone is back on the street and the entire community is rallying around him and donating their money for the community center.

Stunned, T.S. returns to his office and contemplates the mysteries of life. When Amy tells him that she believes that everyone deserves a second chance, T.S. says, “And what if you’re wrong? What if all those people get kicked in the teeth again?”

The next morning, Amy goes down to the church and waits, with Aunt Martha, for Boone to show up and announce his plans for the money that’s he’s raised. However, Boone never shows up because it turns out that T.S. Turner was right and it really was all an elaborate con! Instead, having packed all of his money in suitcase, Boone and his son prepare to leave their apartment building and head to another town.

However, T.S. is waiting for them in the stairwell. When Boone claims that he was just about to head for the church, Turner declares, “With a suitcase full of money? Come on, brother! Give me some rap! Give it up, Sweet Tooth! Your son deserves better! If you want a better life for your kid, you need to go to that church and stand by your word. You just gotta believe your own rap! EVERYONE ELSE DOES!”

At the church, Aunt Martha tries to keep the crowd calm by singing a gospel song. Given how I feel about gospel music, you can imagine how relieved I was when a reformed Sweet Tooth finally showed up at the church and everyone stopped singing. Sweet Tooth goes straight and uses the money to open up the community center. All it took was T.S. Turner showing up at his apartment building!

As I watched this episode, it occurred to me that Mr. T’s main strength as an actor was his innate earnestness. As limited as his range may have been, the viewer never doubted for a minute that he believed everything that he said. This episode worked because it allowed Mr. T. to be himself.

Episode 1.14 “Playing With Fire”

(Dir by Harvey Frost, originally aired on April 11th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T says, “the heat is on a teenage girl who’s charged with arson.”

Across Canada, someone is setting fires. After teenager Felicity (Susannah Hoffman) is found playing a flute in front of a fire that’s raging in a park, she’s arrested. Because Amy is the only defense attorney in Toronto, she’s assigned to the case. And when Amy is assigned to your case, that means that T.S. Turner is assigned to it as well!

Unfortunately, Felicity isn’t very helpful and gets defensive whenever Amy asks her why she always goes to the park to play her flute, even in the middle of the harsh Canadian winter. Turner goes down to the park to investigate on his own and he meets Kramer (Alan Fawcett), a real estate developer who wants to build a luxury condo in the middle of the park. Since this is T. and T., “luxury condo” is all we need to hear to know that Kramer is a bad guy.

Another building in the park burns down and again, for some reason, Felicity is nearby playing her flute. Felicity is again accused of being the arsonist, which leads to a police interrogation scene where we discover that, as an attorney, Amy’s main legal strategy is to dramatically roll her eyes whenever anyone asks her client a question. Meanwhile, T.S. heads down to the park and discovers that the building was insured for a million Canadian dollars.

“The only way we’re going to avoid paying,” the claims agent explains, “is if that lady lawyer gets that flutist off.”

“Lady lawyer!?” Turner replies, “You mean Ms. Amy Taler!”

“I hope she pleads as good as she looks,” the agent says.

T.S. nods. “I’ll pass it on.”

Felicity is dragged down to a mental hospital, where she is committed for a week-long evaluation. She sits in her room and plays her flute and I have to say that it didn’t take me long to get really sick of Felicity and her stupid flute. Seriously, every time we see her, she’s playing the flute and getting angry about Amy trying to clear her name. What an annoying character!

Anyway, Felicity overhears Turner telling Amy that he thinks that Kramer is behind the arsons so Felicity breaks out of the mental hospital, goes down to one of Kramer’s buildings, and starts playing her flute. When Kramer confronts Felicity, she threatens to burn down the building for real. This leads to Kramer confessing, just in time for Turner to show up and subdue him.

That’s the end of that. Felicity’s name is cleared but Felicity is still such an annoying character that it’s difficult to really care.

Next week: Amy’s frequently frazzled administrative assistant gets an episode of her very own!

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.11 “Junkyard Blues” and 1.12 “Killing Time”

Posted on September 15, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Amy loses her car and her mind!

Episode 1.11 “Junkyard Blues”

(Dir by Dan McCutcheon, originally aired on March 21st, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Amy’s car goes missing and so does Amy. And I finally get my day in court!”

Amy is not having a good day. She’s running later for court so she parks her car in a no-parking zone. When she gets to court, she discovers that she forgot to bring an important file. Fortunately, the judge delays the start of the trial until Amy is prepared to proceed. (Canadian judges are super nice!) T.S. Turner tells Amy not to worry.

“Even good guys have a bad day!” he tells her.

Amy’s day is just about to get worse because, upon leaving the courthouse, she discovers that her car has been towed! She goes from lot to lot, trying to find who towed her car but everyone tells her the same thing. None of them towed a ’78, black VW convertible. Amy tracks down the only witness to the car being taken, a 14 year-old named Sydney (Tara Strong). Sydney is an aspiring journalist and she declares that Amy’s car getting stolen “could be the story that I’ve been waiting for!”

Amy finally returns to the office and, after snapping at administrative assistant Sophie, Amy says, “Pokey’s been stolen!”

“Why would any want to steal Pokey?” Sophie asks.

“It’s a classic! They just don’t make cars like that anymore!” Amy shouts.

“Easy, Amy,” T.S. says, “If it’s stolen, I’ll find it for you.”

Amy, however, is determined to find the car herself. T.S. objects and points out that he’s the private investigator and that Amy is the attorney who is due in court on several important matters. In a move that would get an American lawyer disbarred, Amy tells T.S. to handle all of her court stuff while she looks for her car. She then thinks that she sees Pokey being driven past the office so she runs outside and chases after it, yelling, “That’s my car!”

Somehow, 14 year-old Sydney figures out that Amy’s car has been taken to a chop shop. While Amy takes an adolescent that she barely knows into a potentially deadly situation, T.S. Turner goes to court and plays the role of lawyer. Fortunately, he’s able to get yet another continuance, which is a bit anticlimactic when you consider the potential of Mr. T playing someone pretending to be an attorney.

While T.S. potentially ruins her client’s life, Amy and the teenage girl who she has known for less than a day break into a criminal-controlled junkyard so that they can search for her car. As I watched Amy and Sydney sneak around the auto yard, I found myself wondering if Sydney had parents and if they knew that she was putting her life at risk to help an attorney find a VW convertible named Pokey.

Fortunately, T.S. gets out of court in time to head down to the junkyard, toss around the car thieves, and help Amy rescue her car from being smashed. Unfortunately, even after knocking out the thieves (“Goodnight, brother,” T.S. says.), T.S. is still not able to prevent Amy from accidentally destroying her car while trying to figure out how to lower it from the junkyard crane.

“It’s okay, Amy,” T.S. says, “So what if you’re not a good detective?”

“It was just a car,” Sydney says.

“THERE’S NO OTHER CAR LIKE THAT IN THE WORLD!” Amy yells at the teenager who risked her life to help a total stranger.

Presumably because he doesn’t want to have to spend the rest of his life listening to Amy complain about her car, T.S. buys Amy a new black VW convertible.

In the past, I’ve wondered why this show usually only focuses on one of the T’s. Now I understand that it’s because Amy Taler, the other T, is an incredibly annoying character who will risk other people’s lives and not even say thank you afterwards. This episode featured too many scenes of Amy yelling about her car and not enough scenes of T.S. gruffly telling people to stay out of his way. I mean, I love my car too but I’m not going to force a stranger to break into a chop shop with me to search for it. I’d probably ask my sisters to do it.

Anyway, let’s move on.

Episode 1.12 “Killing Time”

(Dir by Dan McCutcheon, originally aired on March 21st, 1998)

“On this week’s episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Amy and I get put on full alert when an escaped killer come back in town, seeking revenge.”

Years ago, Joe Nichols (played by Geza Kovacs, a favorite of David Cronenberg’s) was convicted of murdering his ex-wife’s new husband. The key testimony in the case against him was given by his five year-old daughter, Wendy (Mairon Bennett). And who was the prosecutor who sent Joe to prison? Amy Taler!

Yes, apparently Amy was prosecutor before she went into private practice. It’s kind of interesting how the show is continually revealing contradictory details about Amy’s past, almost as if the show’s writers were making up the character as they went along. Amy tells T.S. that the Nichols case was the last she prosecuted before switching sides. Joe Nichols was a viscous killer and he needed to be taken off the streets so I’m not sure why the Nichols case would be the one that would lead to Amy resigning from the prosecutor’s office.

Anyway, Joe escapes from prison and returns to whatever Canadian city T and T is supposed to take place in. The cops think that Joe is coming for his daughter but T.S. thinks that Joe is actually after Amy and decides to stake out Amy’s apartment so that he can beat up Joe when he shows up. And that’s what happens.

Seriously, that was pretty much the entire episode. That 30-minute run time pretty much guaranteed that T and T would always keep everything direct and to the point. Geza Kovacs is as menacing in this episode as he was as Greg Stillson’s bodyguard in Cronenberg’s adaptation of The Dead Zone. But it’s hard not to regret that this episode lacked the usual T.S. Turner quips. Other than yelling at a cop for calling him and “interrupting my cookie break,” T.S. didn’t have many memorable lines in this episode which, to me, defeats the whole purpose of casting Mr. T as a private investigator.

Well, that’s two disappointing episodes of T. and T! Hopefully, next week will be a return to form for both the show and T.S. Turner.

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.9 “On Ice” and 1.10 “The Latest Development”

Posted on September 8, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, T.S. insults the national sport of Canada and Amy battles city hall.

Episode 1.9 “On Ice”

(Dir by Alan Simmonds, originally aired on March 7th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Decker is forced to face the truth about a long-time friend.”

Though T and T took place in a generic city, the show itself was filmed in Canada, with a largely Canadian cast and crew. Hence, it only makes sense that the show would eventually do an episode that centered around hockey. This episode opens with Mr. T’s friend, Decker (David Nerman), coaching a junior hockey game. While the players skate on the ice and chase the puck, Decker deals with fans like the loud Mrs. Mowby (Jayne Eastwood), who is apparently convinced that she knows better how to coach the team than the actual coach! Unfortunately, Decker is yanked out of the game by two detectives who announce that he is under arrest for “theft of over $2,000.”

After T.S. Turner and Amy bails Decker out of jail, Amy explains that it appears that over $25,000 has been embezzled from the Junior Hockey Association. Decker admits to being the association’s treasurer but he also admits to not being good at numbers. He explains that his old friend, Goldie Stanski (played by Sean McCann), usually goes over the books for him.

“Goldie?” T.S. growls, “You trusted a guy named Goldie!?”

Decker explains that Goldie has been his friend for years. Goldie was his former coach! And, indeed, when Mrs. Mowby demands that Decker be kicked out of the Junior Hockey League, Goldie argues that Decker has not been convicted of anything, not that it does Decker much good. However, Detective Jones (Ken James) informs T.S. that “word on the street” is that Goldie has a gambling addiction.

Decker takes T.S. to his next practice and introduces T.S. to the team. They ask T.S. if he’s going to join them on the ice.

“No thanks, brothers,” T.S. replies, “I don’t play no sport when you can get frostbitten indoors. Besides, I think hockey’s an old ladies’ game …. Look at the ton of equipment you guys wear!”

After practice, Decker is arrested for a second time after the detectives, having gotten an anonymous tip, search his locker and just happen to find a bus ticket that leads to a bag full of money. Fortunately, Amy is able to bail him out of jail again, much to the relief of her spacey administrative assistant, Sophie (Catherine Disher), who has a crush on Decker.

T.S. has decided that Goldie is setting up Decker. Now, he just has to get Goldie to give himself away.

“I think with a little persuasion,” T.S. tells Amy, “he might do something foolish …. Friendly persuasion, of course!”

T.S.’s style of persuasion is to show up in Goldie’s apartment and tell him that everyone knows what Goldie’s done while drinking a glass of milk. “Thanks for the milk,” T.S. growls before leaving. When Goldie responds by going to the gym and pocketing more money from the hockey’s charity fund, Amy, T.S., and Decker are there to chase him out on the ice and catch him. If you’ve ever wanted to see Mr. T drive a Zamboni, this is the episode for you.

Decker’s name is cleared and he’s re-instated as coach. Yay!

This was a totally predictable episode but I kind of liked it. Mr. T on a Zamboni was just a ludicrous enough image to make the entire show work.

Episode 1.10 “The Latest Development”

(Dir by George Mihalka, aired on March 14th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Amy and I fight City Hall …. and City Hall fights back!”

When a dumb, 13 year-old kid named Nick (Toby Proctor) breaks into a construction site and takes a bulldozer for a joyride, he accidentally destroys a truck. The owner of the site, Enzo Malec (George Touliatos), is determined to throw the book at Nick because he’s an evil developer and he wants both Nick and his grandmother, Cora (Helen Hughes), out of their home.

It turns out that one of Amy’s former classmates, Brian Brack (Richard Comar), works in the city’s legal department so she heads down to City Hall in an attempt to guilt him into allowing Cora to stay in her home. For once, we actually get to see Amy doing legal work, which basically amounts to wandering around with a file folder and rolling her eyes while having conversations with other people.

Meanwhile, T.S. takes Nick down to the construction site and convinces Malec to let Nick work off his debt as a construction worker. T.S. arranges for Cora to move in with gospel-singing Aunt Martha (Jackie Richardson) while Nick moves in with Decker.

Suddenly, building inspectors show up at Amy’s office and start searching for violations. “Brian Brack is responsible for this, isn’t he!?” Amy says, while the inspectors write her up for not having a window that opens quickly enough. That’s a $2,000 fine! Upon discovering that they are now going to war with city hall, T.S. tells Amy, “This could be a title bout!”

Amy confronts Brian at a fancy restaurant and tells him that she has discovered that he has invested in Enzo Malec’s development. She demands to know who he and Malec paid off at city hall. Brian tells Amy that she doesn’t know who she is missing with. Amy responds by tossing a drink on him. In a case of amazing timing, Alderman Kent (Mark Walker) shows up and asks if Amy is going to be joining him and Brian for lunch. Hmmm …. I wonder who the corrupt politician could be.

Meanwhile, T.S. and Decker help Nick deal with his anger by training him to box.

“I know how to fight!” Nick says.

“To win, you need a strategy,” T.S. replies.

T.S. proceeds to knock down a 13 year-old.

While T.S. is teaching Nick how to fight, the city is threatening to shut down Aunt Jackie’s foster home! When T.S. finds out, he puts on his dark jacket and starts to head off to City Hall so he can presumably beat up the mayor. Instead, Amy convinces him to hold off by revealing that Brian and Alderman Kent have been taking bribes from Enzo Malec. When T.S. heads down to the construction site, Malec panics and, later that night, he tries to burn a bunch of incriminating files. However, it turns out that he’s being filmed by Amy and the local news.

And that apparently fixes the whole thing!

This episode felt rushed as it basically only had 30 minutes to deal with an hour’s worth of complications. It only took one boxing lesson for Nick to let go of his anger and it only took one confrontation with T.S for Enzo Malec to make one sloppy mistake. That said, I appreciate any episode that portrays municipal government as being thoroughly corrupt and irredeemable. Fight the system!

Next week: Amy’s car gets stolen!

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.7 “The Silver Angel” and 1.8 “And Baby Makes Nine”

Posted on September 1, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, we meet T.S. Turner’s family!

Episode 1.7 “The Silver Angel”

(Dir by Donald Shebib, originally aired on February 22nd, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T informs us, “Amy and I get mixed up with a modern day Robin Hood and we are forced to recruit some heavyweight help.”

The Silver Angel is a silver-clad trumpet player who has been going to a high-priced grocery store, filling his cart with food, and then running off with the cart and not paying. The police that think that they have finally arrested him. However, the man that they caught is Duffy (Edward Atienza), an elderly crossing guard who doesn’t even seem to know what’s happening to him. Amy is assigned to his case.

T.S., however, has other things to worry about. As he explains to gym owner Decker, his nephew is a member of a rap group known as The Fat Boys and, as you might guess from their name, they’re a bit overweight. Their manager wants The Fat Boys to lose a few pounds before their next tour and who better to oversee their diet than T.S. and his friend Decker? The Fat Boys show up at the gym and it’s time for an exercise montage!

Anyway, it soon becomes apparent that Duffy is not as senile and frail as he appears to be and he actually is the Silver Angel. Amy discovers that Duffy has been taking the stolen food to a homeless shelter.

“It’s still a crime,” T.S. says.

“I know. It looks like I’m going to lose this case!” Amy declares, as if she’s the first attorney to ever defend someone who was guilty. One would think that Amy would understand that the job of a defense attorney is to serve as an advocate for their client and to help them make their way through the legal system. The question of whether or not the guy is actually guilty really isn’t the issue that she should be concerning herself with.

The Fat Boys, overhearing Amy and T.S.’s conversation, decide that they need to help the Silver Angel. “My mind is clear,” one of the Fat Boys says, “so you stay right here!” Did I mention that the Fat Boys rap all of their dialogue? “I went downtown to get this stuff,” another Fat Boy declares as they collect food to give to the homeless, “Come on, brothers, it’s up to us!”

Anyway, Duffy puts on his angel costume once again and shows up at the grocery store. When the store’s manager, Mr. Hanlon (Sam Moses), orders security to catch the Angel, the Fat Boys suddenly show up in angel costumes and it leads to a chase scene throughout the store.

T.S. brings the chase to a close by grabbing Mr. Hanlon, lifting him up and carrying him around the store. T.S. tossed Mr. Hanlon into a display of eggs and declares, “Sorry, brother! Nobody touches an angel!”

How about a thief? Are they allowed to touch a thief?

Anyway, for some reason, Hanlon drops the charges so I guess Duffy gets away with his crimes and Amy maintains her perfect acquittal record.

This was dumb. Grocery store owners don’t owe you a thing and, by stealing all of that food, the only thing Duffy did was probably cost everyone their Christmas bonus. I mean, is there a reason why he couldn’t buy food and then take it to the homeless shelter? Some hero. More like the Silver Jackass, am I right? Let’s move on.

Episode 1.8 “And Baby Makes Nine”

(Dir by Harvey Frost, originally aired on February 29th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Amy and I find that more than just diapers are dirty when we track down the person responsible for an abandoned baby.”

One of Amy’s clients leaves a baby on the front doorstep on the office, along with a note that says she’ll be back in a few days. As opposed to calling the police or child protective services, Amy gives the baby to T.S. to look after. T.S. takes the baby to the hospital and, after discovering the baby is in perfect health, he takes the baby to Decker’s gym. Amy is not happy when she sees T.S.’s car parked outside the gym. A gym is no place for a child, she declares, not with all the sweaty men around.

“The baby has to learn how to sweat,” Decker replies, “He can’t pant like a dog for all of his life!”

Back at the office, Amy explains that parenting is a little bit more complicated nowadays than it was when T.S. was a child.

“Babies still need to be changed, don’t they?” T.S. replies, “Wow! Look at the great job I did on his diaper!”

Anyway, the baby is actually the son of Henry (Martin Neufeld) and Betty (Joanne Vannicola). Henry made a deal with a corrupt adoption attorney named Mr. Finn (David Calderisi) to sell his son. Not wanting to lose her child, Betty dropped the child off at the law office in the hopes that Amy would know how to stop the adoption. When Henry goes down to the gym to try to grab his son, he is instead grabbed by T.S. Turner. When Turner threatens to sell Henry, Henry asks what he’s talking about.

“We’re talking about baby selling, Henry!” Turner replies, “We’re talking about what type of man would sell his own flesh and blood! What do you think we should do to a father who would sell his own son?”

Turner scares Henry straight and he promises not to sell the baby. Betty forgives him, which is kind of weird.

“It’s people like you,” Amy later hisses at Finn, “who give my profession a bad name.”

And that’s the end of that. This was yet another episode that would have worked better if the story played out of an hour instead of just 30 minutes. As it is, the whole thing felt rather rushed. That said, at least Betty was a more sympathetic client than the Silver Angel jackass.

Next week: T. and T. reminds us that it’s a Canadian show with an episode that is all about hockey!

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.5 “The Drop” and 1.6 “Something In The Air”

Posted on August 25, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Mr. T takes on drug dealers and mad bombers!

Episode 1.5 “The Drop”

(Dir by Allan Kroeker, originally aired on February 8th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “a kid’s life is shattered when he’s arrested for dealing drugs. Amy and I try to pick the pieces, with some unexpected help from Renee!”

This episode begins with one of my favorite cop show clichés. A suspected drug courier is grabbed by two cops. They open the envelope that he was carrying and discover a white powder. One of the cops puts some of the power on her fingers and then sticks her fingers in her mouth.

“High grade crack!” she announced.

Hey, just be happy it wasn’t anthrax!

In this case, the accused courier is a 14 year-old named Norm (Gerry Musgrave), who says that he has no idea what was in the envelopes and he was only carrying them because he answered a classified ad asking for delivery people. However, the prosecution is determined to send a message by trying Norm as an adult! Fortunately, Norm is friends with T.S.’s goddaughter, Renee (Rachael Crawford). Renee brings T.S. and Amy onto the case.

“Loosen up, brother, you already convinced us,” T.S. tells Norm, “Now we just got to the convince the court.”

Norm moves into T.S.’s home, where he is looked after by the gospel-singing Aunt Martha (Jackie Robinson). While Jackie helps Norm get settled in, Renee approaches T.S. and says, “I’ve seen the ads on crack. I know what it does.”

“And you want to help Norm,” T.S. says, “Don’t get involved! People dealing drugs are very dangerous!”

Renee does not take T.S.’s advice and instead, approaches the school drug dealer, Bob Douglas (Jeremy Ratchford). She compliments Bob on his red trans am and Bob invites her to meet up with him at a local disco. Renee’s friends tell her that she might be making a mistake but Renee snaps that she can’t look the other way like everyone else at school.

While Renee skips class so she can meet up with Bob at the most depressing nightclub I’ve ever seen (seriously, there’s just one very sad disco ball hanging over the dance floor), T.S. meets with Fat Sam, who is not fat and who is played by future television director Clark Johnson! (As an actor, Johnson is probably best-known for playing Meldrick Lewis on Homicide and later Gus Johnson on The Wire.)

“Fat Sam,” T.S. says, “you’re the coolest dude I know!”

“As long as the dice keep rolling my way,” Fat Sam replies, “Rumor on the street has it that you’re looking for a specific crack dealer.”

“Be honest with you, Fat Sam,” T.S. replies, “I want to bust all the crack dealers but I want this one first.”

Fat Sam makes some phone calls and tells T.S. that the crack dealer he’s looking for is …. BOB DOUGLAS!

“Thanks, Fat Sam, I owe you one,” T.S. replies.

Meanwhile, Bob Douglas has taken Renee to his loft apartment! When Bob discovers the Renee has been searching his apartment while he was distracted, Bob has a paranoid breakdown, accuses Renee of being a narc, and makes a run for it. Fortunately, T.S. and Amy show up in time to catch him and clear Norm’s name! Yay!

This episode suffered a bit because, for all the build-up, it turned out that all Amy and T.S. needed to do to prove Norm’s innocence was to get Fat Sam to make one phone call. It felt a bit anticlimactic, to say the least. This is a case where the limits of that 30-minute running time really worked against the story the show was trying to tell. That said, Mr. T growling against crack is always enjoyable to watch.

Episode 1.6 “Something In The Air”

(Dir by Allan A. Goldstein, originally aired on February 15th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tell us, “a radio DJ is the target of an angry phone caller. While Amy fights to keep the D.J. on the air, I get to make a few calls of my own.”

After radio DJ PJ Reynolds (Lee Curreri) encourages his listeners to “take it to the streets,” one of his listeners blows up a mailbox. The district attorney wants to take Reynolds off the air! Fortunately, Reynold is a client of Amy Taler’s! When Louney (Neil Munro), the smarmy D.A. tries to convince Amy and T.S. to deliver a court summons to the DJ, T.S. replies, “Sorry, brother. We ain’t a delivery service!”

Because there’s only one explosives dealer in all of Canada, Turner confronts his friend Whisperer (Martin Donlevy) and demands to know who he has been selling to. Whisperer says that he sold a timer to a man who said that he wanted to take down Reynolds. “He sounded like someone who was used to getting what he wants.” Somehow, T.S. figures that this means Louney is behind the bombings. Turner needs Louney to call the show again but Reynolds has voluntarily taken himself off the air.

“Let’s talk responsibility,” Turner snaps at the DJ, “That’s the big talk!”

Convined that he has a responsibility, Reynolds goes back on the air and Louney can’t help but call him. Though Louney hangs up before the police can trace the call, T.S. is staking out Louney’s house and, as soon as Louney steps outside with a briefcase bomb, Turner goes after him. It leads to a car chase that ends with T.S. capturing Louney and forcing to Louney to defuse his latest bomb right before it detonates.

A grateful PJ promises that, from now on, he’s going to be “Mr. Mellow” on the air. When Amy says she doesn’t think it’ll happen, PJ says, “You’ll have to tune in and see.”

“Not me, brother,” T.S. replies, “I’m going to stick to my TV …. it’s my favorite medium!”

I liked this episode because it stood up for free speech. Any show that exposes a power-crazed bureaucrat, I’m going to enjoy.

Next week, Amy and T.S. search for …. THE SILVER ANGEL!