Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

It’s the aftermath of Zack and Kelly’s break-up!  Who will survive!?

Episode 3.5 “The Aftermath”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on September 21st, 1991)

Last week, Kelly got a job at The Max and developed a crush on her boss, Jeff (Patrick Muldoon). Zack and Kelly broke up at the school dance. Kelly asked Zack if they could still be friends. “Always,” Zack said.

It turns out that Zack was lying. This episode finds him bitter and obsessed. Screech and Slater take him out to the movies but — oh no! — Kelly and Jeff walk in. Jessie, Lisa, and Screech each set Zack up on a blind date. Zack goes out with Jessie’s fat friend and she eats all of his popcorn. Lisa’s friend is more interested in talking about the books of Jackie Collins than watching the movie. And Screech’s cousin turns out to be a perfectly nice and pretty blonde. (“She’s adopted,” Screech explains.)

Zack takes Screech’s cousin to The Max and dances with her… in front of Kelly! And they’re dancing to… A12 on the jukebox! “That’s Zack and Kelly’s song!” Screech says. Apparently, it’s a song that doesn’t have a title or much of a beat. “A12 is sacred!” Kelly says. “It was sacred until you dumped me for that jerk!” Zack says.

Now, I’m a bit torn here. Zack’s definitely in the wrong here, but is A12 actually sacred? I mean, it’s not mentioned in any other episode. And while Zack is definitely trying to make Kelly feel bad, Kelly is being pretty self-righteous for someone who didn’t break up with her boyfriend until after she kissed another guy. I guess my feeling is that sacred songs pretty much went out the window as soon as Kelly and Zack broke up.

Anyway, Screech’s cousin throws her milkshake on Zack.

Lisa’s Sweet Sixteen birthday party is approaching! Zack says he won’t come if Kelly and Jeff are invited. Lisa tells him that she’ll invite whoever she wants. At first, Zack refuses to go to the party, but then Screech has a heart-to-heart talk with him. Screech basically tells Zack that he’s being a whiny loser. Imagine what it must have been like to hear that from Screech, of all people.

Kelly and Jeff show up at the party. At first, Slater shows admirable loyalty to his friend Zack by giving Jeff the cold shoulder. Then Jeff mentions that he wrestled in high school. “Won my division a few times,” Jeff says. That’s all it takes for Slater to be like, “Zack who?”

Zack does come to the party. He apologizes for being a jerk. He tells Jeff to take care of Kelly. Zack tells us that he doesn’t know if he’ll ever get over Kelly. We’re left to wonder why he doesn’t just stop time if he’s so miserable…

This episode benefits from the presence of Patrick Muldoon, who makes Jeff into a likable “frat boy babe stealer.” It’s too bad that, in his next appearance, Jeff will have had a total personality transplant, because this episode actually made a pretty good point about the importance of accepting breakups and giving people a chance.

Oh well. That’s life at Bayside.