Horror Film Review: Dashcam (dir by Rob Savage)

Posted on October 21, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Calm down, people.

Seriously, the amount of online hate that I’ve seen directed at the found footage horror film, Dashcam, is not only insanely over the top but it also proves (as if there was any proof necessary) that there are a lot of people out there who are incapable of understanding social satire.

Annie Hardy stars as Annie Hardy, a musician who hosts Band Car, the internet’s #1 Live Improvised Music Show Broadcast From A Moving Vehicle. Yes, Annie Hardy is playing a fictionalized version of herself, which is something that many of this film’s critics don’t seem to understand. (Or, more likely, they do understand that but they’re pretending to be obtuse for the clicks.) In the film, which was shot at the height of COVID lockdowns, Annie grows tired of Los Angeles and hops a plane for London. In London, she reunites with her former bandmate, Stretch (Amer Chadha-Patel) and proceeds to clash with just everyone that she meets.

The film’s version of Annie is outspoken about her politics, which is one reason why so many critics have gone after this film. Annie is anti-lockdown. She’s anti-government. She has little use for virtue signaling activists. She spends a lot of time going out of her way to annoy people who wear masks. These are all things most of today’s movie heroes are not allowed to do but Annie’s attitude is, for better or worse, a fair reflection of how a lot of people were feeling at the height of the COVID era. Despite what was often presented in the movies and on television, most people were not lighting their Fauci prayer candles and dutifully waiting for word from the CDC. Most people were not the girl from that Walgreen’s commercial, smiling behind their mask as they rode their kick scooter to the neighborhood market so that they could pick up the latest organic fruit. Most people were frustrated and pissed off and sick of having to pretend otherwise.

Annie’s trip to the UK is predictably a disaster and, because she live streams the entire experience, Stetch’s always-masked wife discovers just how much she and Annie disagree on politics. This leads to a physical confrontation which leads to Annie stealing Stretch’s car. You do have to feel a little bit bad for Stretch at this point. Stretch works as a food delivery driver so, as annoying as Stetch can be, he does kind of need his car. Annie decides to take on one of his deliveries herself, just to discover that the owner of a restaurant wants Annie to drive a sick and incontinent old woman named Angela to another location. Despite her initial misgivings, Annie agrees. Because Annie has been live streaming the entire time, Stretch is able to track them down.

Of course, it turns out that Angela is not quite what she seems and soon, Annie and Stretch find themselves having to deal with cults, demons, and a lot other things. Quite a few people die along the way. Except for a few times when the signal is lost, the entire event is live streamed and the film is worth watching twice just so you can read all of the comments from the people watching Annie and Stretch try to survive a night. They provide a commentary not only on what’s happening to Annie and Stretch but also on the horror genre in general and the whole found footage idea in specific. At the same time that I was getting annoyed with Stretch for being whiny, so were Annie’s fans. While Annie and Stretch were running from Angela, a fight was breaking out in the comments over Annie’s politics. A few people were concerned that Annie was going to get killed. A few were claiming that it was all fake. The majority were eager to see more blood. Quite a few complained that any moment that Annie spent hiding from Angela was “BORING.” One thing they all had in common was a need to try to turn everything that they were watching into either a commentary on politics or an ironic joke. It was a perfect portrayal of online culture.

Both Annie and Angela are forces of chaos in Dashcam, perfect representations of how many people were feeling at the height of the COVID era. (Angela wears a mask throughout the film. At one point, the mask fills up with blood, which is perhaps as powerful a symbol of COVID horror as I’ve seen thus far.) Annie’s a survivor because she refuses to rationalize everything that’s happening around her. She embraces her anger and her annoyance with the world. As a result, Dashcam is not just an effective found footage horror film. It’s also a document of how many people viewed the world in 2021. With so many now trying to rewrite the history of what actually happened during the COVID era, it’s important to have a film, like Dashcam, that reveals just how angry and paranoid people really were. In its way, Dashcam is a valuable time capsule.

Annie Hardy is currently taking a lot of online abuse from trolls who can’t tell the difference between the film’s Annie Hardy and the real-life Annie Hardy. That’s a shame because Annie Hardy is a natural when she’s onscreen and she gives a good performance. Dashcam is currently on Hulu and it’s tempting to compare this film sharp combination of horror and commentary to the rather bland and painfully inoffensive Hellraiser reboot. Hellraiser could have used Annie Hardy.

Horror on the Lens: The Lodger (dir by Alfred Hitchcock)

Posted on October 21, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

A serial killer known as “The Avenger” is murdering blonde women in London (which, once again, proves that its better to be a redhead). And while nobody knows the identity of the Avenger, they do know that the enigmatic stranger (Ivor Novello), who has just recently rented a room at boarding house, happens to fit his description. They also know that the lodger’s landlord’s daughter happens to be a blonde…

Released in 1927, the silent The Lodger was Alfred Hitchcock’s third film but, according to the director, this was the first true “Hitchcock film.” Certainly it shows that even at the start of his career, Hitchcock’s famous obsessions were already present — the stranger accused of a crime, the blonde victims, and the link between sex and violence.

Also of note, the credited assistant director — Alma Reville — would become Alma Hitchcock shortly before The Lodger was released.

October Positivity: Buying Time (dir by Michael Cargile)

Posted on October 20, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

2019’s Buying Time opens in the future.

It’s not a particularly happy future. Many things have been declared illegal and forbidden, all in the name of the public good. Secret police roam the streets. Those who refuse to obey the system are arrested and held in dark cells. It’s all for the benefit of the people, of course. (Not me, us and all that nonsense.)

Adam Demus (Drew Garrett) is arrested for street racing and tossed into a dark cell. Adam is a rebel, though he doesn’t seem to be sure what exactly it is that he’s rebelling against. To Adam’s shock and anger, his father, Nick (Jake Head) is brought into the cell. It is quickly established that Nick used to be an abusive drunk and that he regularly beat both Adam and Adam’s mother. Adam wants nothing to do with Nick but Nick asks him to just listen to his story. Seeing as how the cell is locked, Adam doesn’t really have much choice. While Nick speaks, the government monitors everything that he says. They’re just waiting for him to say one certain thing so that they can make their move.

Nick talks about his youth and how he was once also a street racer. In the years before the new government came to power, Nick would spend every night racing against two brother, Ben and Pete. But then, one night, a terrible accident landed Ben in the hospital. Having nearly died, Ben declared himself to be a Christian and, instead of racing, he now wanted to preach. Pete wasn’t particularly happy about that. In fact, outside of their mother and the local preacher, no one was happy about that. Ben would still go to the street races but now, he would try to preach and he would go on and on about how breaking the law went against God’s will. Finally, Nick called Ben’s bluff and challenged him to a race. If Ben won the race, he would be allowed to preach and everyone would listen to him. If Nick won the race …. well, who knows? I guess Ben would just have to go to some other illegal event and try to preach there. (One can only imagine how his message would have gone down at a cockfight.) Anyway, if you’ve ever seen a faith-based film, you’ll know that this all leads to tragedy, a sudden conversion, and eventually a scene where the government declares that Christianity is now forbidden.

Due to its structure, Buying Time has an odd feel to it. Indeed, it feels like two separate movies and it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that the interrogation scenes were conceived and added after the scenes involving Ben and Pete. All in all, it’s a pretty heavy-handed film and Ben and Pete are not particularly likable characters. Ben is preachy. Peter is resentful. Even their mom is a bit full-of-herself. That said, I do like fast cars and I don’t care much for the government so I appreciated the film on those two levels. It’s interesting to note that, as a viewer, I never really bought Ben’s sudden conversion to Christianity but I totally believed that the government would have no problem taking away everyone’s rights. I guess that says a lot about the state of the world today.

Horror on TV: Circle of Fear 1.20 “Spare Parts” (dir by Charles S. Dubin)

Posted on October 20, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

On tonight’s episode of Circle of Fear, Susan Oliver plays the widow of a doctor who allows his hands, eyes, and vocal chords to be used in transplants. Unfortunately for her, the spirit of her dead husband is still inside of his donated body parts. Because he’s convinced that she murdered him, the dead doctor seeks an elaborate revenge on his wife.

This episode originally aired on February 23rd, 1973. It was written by Jimmy Sangster, who is best known for his work with Hammer Films.

Enjoy!

The TSL’s Horror Grindhouse: Bigfoot (dir by Bruce Davison)

Posted on October 20, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

In this 2012 Asylum production, the legendary Bigfoot is revealed to just be a big gorilla who wants to sleep for the winter. In fact, Bigfoot seems to have more in common with King Kong than the hairy, humanoid that people have been reporting seeing for over a hundred years. Unfortunately, all of the hunters and the tourists and the noise from a local music festival keep interrupting Bigfoot’s slumber. It turns out that Bigfoot is not a morning monster and tends to wake up grumpy. When Bigfoot is in a bad mood, he turns over RVs, steps on hunters, and tries to destroy Mt. Rushmore.

Concert promoter Harley Henderson (Donny Bonaduce) wants to kill Bigfoot and turn his body into a tourist attraction. Environmental activist Simon Quinn (Barry Williams) wants to not only protect Bigfoot but to also perform protest-themed folk music. Harley and Simon were once musical partners, until Simon decided that he would rather protect endangered species and Harley decided to become a businessman. Now, they hate each other and are constantly on the verge of coming to blows. Meanwhile, Sheriff Alvarez (Sherilyn Fenn) just wants to keep her town safe from the creature’s rampage. You read that right. This film is The Partridge Family vs. The Brady Bunch with Twin Peaks trying to keep the peace. If you’re wondering how The Asylum convinced Bonaduce, Williams, and Sherilyn Fenn to all appear in a low-budget film about a giant gorilla menacing South Dakota, consider that they also convinced Bruce Davison to appear in it as well. In fact, Bruce not only stars but he directed the film as well! I mean, Bonaduce and Williams were probably just happy that someone was calling them and this film was made before Twin Peak: The Return reignited Fenn’s career. Bruce Davison, however, has an Oscar nomination to his name. Of course, before one gets too snarky, it’s important to remember that actors have bill to pay, just like the rest of us. Sometimes, those bills are played by appearing in Shakespeare. Sometimes, they’re paid by appearing in Bigfoot.

Actually, no one should be ashamed about appearing in Bigfoot. Like most of the films produced by the Asylum, Bigfoot is actually a lot of fun. It’s not a film that’s meant to be taken seriously. Instead, it’s basically a parody of the big-budget giant monster movies that come out of Hollywood, complete with a tacked-on environmental subplot and an endangered national monument. Bigfoot is in on the joke. The minute that Barry Williams picks up his guitar and starts to sing an insufferable folk song, it’s obvious that this film is laughing along with us. Bigfoot was designed to be a silly film and it succeeds. When taken on its own terms, it’s hard not to enjoy it.

Finally, Alice Cooper appears in this film as himself, performing at Bonaduce’s concert. After Alice complains about the crowd size and bemoans the indignity of going from being one of the world’s biggest stars to performing at a festival in South Dakota, Bigfoot literally kicks him off the stage. Much like the film, Alice deserves some credit for be willing to poke fun at himself.

Retro Television Reviews: City Guys 2.3 “The Roommate” and 2.4 “Jamal Got His Gun”

Posted on October 20, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing City Guys, which ran on NBC from 1997 to 2001. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

Season two of City Guys continues as Chris gets a roommate and Jamal gets a gun!

Roll with the city guys….

Episode 2.3 “The Roommate”

(Directed by Frank Bonner, originally aired on September 26th, 1998)

After getting into a fight with his mother, El-Train leaves his house and ends up staying with Chris at the latter’s Park Avenue Penthouse. It’s just as dumb as it sounds. El-Train turns out to be a well-intentioned but terrible roommate but at least we get to see Chris’s penthouse once again. Chris’s parents are nowhere to be seen but the butler and the maid make return appearances.

In between trying to get El-Train to move back in with his mom, Chris and Jamal work on a report about the history of New York City. Jamal says that it should be an easy report for them because, “We’re city guys!” The audience cheers and you can practically hear the little voices saying, “Oh my God! That’s the title of the show!”

In yet another subplot, Al convinces Dawn and Cassidy to pose for some pictures that he wants to sell to a magazine. In past episodes, there’s no way that Dawn and Cassidy would have allowed Al to photograph them but, for the purposes this episode, it was convenient to make them less sensible. (Of course, as another example of City Guys struggle to maintain continuity, this episode also overlooks the fact that Cassidy already is a model.) For some reason, a newspaper buys the photographs and puts Dawn and Cassidy’s heads onto the bodies of pregnant women. The audience loves it but Dawn and Cassidy are less amused.

Anyway, this was a fairly silly episode but Steven Daniel’s performance as El-Train continued to be one of the show’s highlights. As the episode ends, El-Train stands at the front of a classroom and prepares to give his report on the history of “Philadelphia, the city of brotherly love! …. starring Tom Hanks….”

Episode 2.4 “Jamal Got His Gun”

(Directed by Frank Bonner, originally aired on October 3rd, 1998)

After getting robbed and having a gun pointed at his face while closing up the diner, Jamal illegally purchases a gun and then accidentally shoots his father!

Damn! City Guys got dark!

Of course, this being City Guys, there’s a silly subplot to balance out all of the dramatic stuff. Cassidy ends up being pursued by a wealthy exchange student from a fictional Middle Eastern country. Cassidy worries that she’ll be taken to the desert and she’ll have to deal with getting dry skin. Once again, City Guys was all about tolerance, unless you were from a country other than the U.S.

But back to the gun plot, I have to give a lot of credit to Wesley Jonathan and, returning in the role of Jamal’s father, Ivory Ocean. Both of them give strong performances in this episode and the scene where Jamal freaks out after realizing that he nearly killed his father is far more powerful than anyone would expect from a show that aired alongside Hang Time and Saved By The Bell: The New Class. Fortunately, the bullet only grazes Jamal’s father and Jamal just gets probation. I guess he can add the additional community service hours to however many hours he had left for the whole Fake ID thing. Between community service, working at the restaurant, and running the school radio station, does Jamal have any free time? Poor guy.

International Horror Film Review: Hostile (dir by Mathieu Turi)

Posted on October 20, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The world is ending and you’re stuck in the desert. The vehicle you were driving has flipped over. You’ve got a severely broken leg and can’t move. The few remaining humans in the city have informed you that a rescue party will not be sent out until the sun rises. And you’ve got a deformed creature circling your crashed van, trying to find a way to enter. You have to figure out how to survive the night while being hunted by some sort of mutant and you also have to mentally work out your relationship issues while doing so.

(It may sound like a nightmare but if you ever break up with someone while on a road trip through South Texas and then you have to ask that person to give you a ride home, it can be a reality. Not that I’m speaking for personal experience, of course….)

That’s the situation in which Juliet (Brittany Ashworth) finds herself in the 2017 French film, Hostile. While Juliet tries to survive the night, she flashes back to the life and the world she used to know. She remembers how she was once a nearly illiterate drug addict who met and fell in love with an art gallery owner named Jack (Grégory Fitoussi). After discussing the paintings of Francis Bacon and the role of fate in everyone’s life, Jack took it on himself to lock Juliet in an apartment until she overcame her addiction. Now, that’s not something that most professionals would necessarily recommend trying, especially when the addict and the apartment owner barely know one another. In fact, I felt it was a bit presumptuous on Jack’s part. Who is Jack to decide that he’s going to be the one to save Juliet’s life? Jack may think that his intentions are good but there’s something a bit too self-righteous and controlling about Jack, even if he is trying to keep someone from self-destructing. He’s every preachy Intervention producer come to life. He’s someone who most viewers will feel a bit of ambiguity about.

The audience might not be totally comfortable with what Jack does but, for Juliet and Jack, it all works out and they fall in love. Juliet remembers the good times with Jack and she also remembers how their relationship eventually fell apart and how the world itself eventually started to end, almost as if their relationship issues were a bit of a metaphor for the fragility of society. Meanwhile, the creature outside the van continues to try to find its way inside.

Hostile is a claustrophobic and atmospheric end-of-the-world thriller from director Mathieu Turi. The inside of that van is a properly ominous location and it’s impossible not to sympathize with Juliet as she struggles to figures out how to survive the night. The film’s deliberate pace takes some getting used to and the final twist requires a certain suspension of disbelief but both Ashworth and Fitoussi are well-cast as Juliet and Jack. In the end, the film is a moody and interesting look at the end of the world, albeit one that is marred by the heavy-handedness of its script.

Horror Film Review: Hellraiser (dir by David Bruckner)

Posted on October 20, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I started watching the Hellraiser reboot. I fell asleep about 40 minutes in.

That’s never a good sign, especially when it comes to a horror movie. A horror movie is supposed to be so scary that you can’t sleep. It’s supposed to be so intense and disturbing that it gives you nightmares, even if you actually do manage to get some rest. A horror movie is supposed to haunt you, not bore you. That’s especially true of the Hellraiser movies, which are defined by their grotesque imagery and the terrifying implications of the Cenobites.

This morning, I finished watching the movie. Somehow, I did not fall asleep again.

The Hellraiser reboot asks the question: “If Doug Bradley isn’t playing Pinhead, is there any point to watching this crap?”

Based on this movie (and, to be fair, the two previous Hellraisers as well), the answer would appear to be no. Jamie Clayton takes over the role of Pinhead in the new Hellraiser and the results are a bit underwhelming.

I mean, the Cenobites still look somewhat frightening, don’t get me wrong. And the puzzle box is a huge part of the reboot’s plot. And there’s still a lot of blood and a lot of talk about how suffering can be music and a lot of people get ripped apart by magical space chains. But, with all that in mind, the Cenobites still come across as being kind of boring. They’ve gone from being frightening creatures beyond imagination to just being generic bad guys.

A big problem is that Jamie Clayton never quite captures the all-encompassing contempt for existence that Doug Bradley brought to the role. Bradley played Pinhead as a regal sadist, delivering his lines with a withering condescension. As played by Bradley, Pinhead was really neither good nor evil. He had transcended such concerns in his search for experience. Hence, he could get away with announcing that he and the Cenobites were angels to some and demons to others. In the original Hellraiser, Pinhead (and Bradley) made his first appearance by saying, “You called, we came,” and that pretty much summed up what made the character so frightening. Bradley’s Pinhead had no concern as to the circumstances that led to him being called and he certainly had no patience for anyone who thought they could talk their way out of the situation. Bradley’s Pinhead was beyond such concerns and that made him all the more frightening.

Jamie Clayton’s Pinhead, on the other hand, is smug and not much else. She’s playing a game with humanity but that leaves her vulnerable to losing. That’s a mistake that Bradley’s Pinhead would not have made. (Or, at least, he wouldn’t have made it in the original movie. The Hellraiser sequels are a different story.) There’s nothing particularly regal about Clayton’s Pinhead. She’s just another horror villain. With her demanding a sacrifice from anyone who cuts themselves on the puzzle box, she’s not that much different from the little girl in Ring.

(In Clayton’s defense, she’s not the first person to replace Doug Bradley as Pinhead. Bradley also did not appear in the two previous Hellraiser films, Revelations and Judgment. Bradley felt the scripts were poorly written and, perhaps more to the point, Dimension Films wanted him to take a pay cut.)

As for the reboot itself, it’s about Riley (Odessa A’zion), a recovering drug addict who, along with her boyfriend Trevor (Drew Starkey), steals the puzzle box and then cuts herself on the box which leads to the Cenobites stalking all of her annoying friends. Riley is an incredibly unlikable character and her friends are kind of whiny so who cares? Gordan Visnjic plays a decadent businessman who is trying to manipulate the box to his own ends. Visnjic has a good scene at the start of the film, one that perfectly captures the privileged ennui that would lead to someone getting involved with the Cenobites. But, eventually, even Visnjic is reduced to being a one-dimensional character.

The main lesson of this Hellraiser film (and the previous two films as well) is that things work better with Doug Bradley than without him.

Horror On The Lens: The Phantom of the Opera (dir by Rupert Julian)

Posted on October 20, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Today’s horror movie on the Shattered Lens is both a classic of silent era and one of the most influential horror films ever made. It’s one that I previously shared in 2013, 2015, 2016, 2108, 2019, 2020, and 2021 but it’s such a classic that I feel that it is worth sharing a second (or fifth or even a sixth or perhaps an eighth) time.

First released in 1925, The Phantom of the Opera is today best known for both Lon Chaney’s theatrical but empathetic performance as the Phantom and the iconic scene where Mary Philbin unmasks him. However, the film is also a perfect example of early screen spectacle. The Phantom of the Opera was released during that period of time, between Birth of the Nation and the introduction of sound, when audiences expected films to provide a visual feast and Phantom of the Opera certainly accomplishes that. Indeed, after watching this film and reading Gaston Leroux’s original novel, it’s obvious that the musical was inspired more by the opulence of this film than by the book.

This film is also historically significant in that it was one of the first films to be massively reworked as the result of a poor test screening. The film’s ending was originally faithful to the end of the novel. However, audiences demanded something a little more dramatic and that’s what they got.

October Positivity: The Perfect Race (dir by Dave Christiano)

Posted on October 19, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

In this 2019 sequel to Remember The Goal, cross country coach Courtney Smith-Donnelly (Allee Sutton Hethcoat) finds herself coaching at the college level. One of the runners that she coached in high school, Brittany (played by Bethany Davenport), is now the best runner at Bethany University. In fact, she’s the second best runner in the nation! Coach Michaels (Clarence Gilyard, Jr.) brings in Courtney to work with Brittany while he deals with some health complications.

So, pretty much all the stuff that happened during the first movie happens during the second. Once again, everyone doubts Courtney’s training methods. Once again, Courtney takes it upon herself to tell all of the runners how to live their lives. Brittany’s father gets angry when Courtney tells Brittany to run slower than usual. Considering that Courtney is now a local celebrity because of how well the cross country team did in Remember the Goal, you might think that the other coaches would know about her techniques and would prepare for them. But nope. No one has any faith in Courtney’s ideas but she’s vindicated in the end. In fact, over the course of two movies, Courtney is never once incorrect about anything. To be honest, that’s kind of annoying.

The main difference between Remember The Goal and The Perfect Race is that Courtney is a thousand times more preachy in the sequel. In the first film, she cited a verse from Corinthians and later talked about Jesus raising a girl from the dead and that was about it. In The Perfect Race, it’s rare that a scene goes by without Courtney saying, “Do you remember the story about….” and then offering up a Biblical lesson. It gets a bit tiring and, again, it’s hard not to get bored with Courtney having all of the answers all of the time. For example, when she’s told that the track team doesn’t practice when its raining, she promptly asks everyone in the room to raise their hand if their parents are divorced. Courtney goes on to explain that, if you’re not willing to train while it’s raining, you probably won’t be able to make a marriage work either. WHAT!? You know what else might end a marriage? Dying of pneumonia.

For a film about athletics, The Perfect Race is a very talky film. Unfortunately, most of the conversations are very repetitive. When Courtney tells Brittany to slow down during one of her races, we got several scenes in a row of people asking each other why Courtney did that. Brittany’s father asks Brittany why Courtney told her to slow down. Brittany replies that she doesn’t know. In the very next scene, Brittany’s father tells Coach Micheals about what Courtney told Brittany to do. Coach Michaels asks Brittany’s father why Courtney did that. “I don’t know,” Brittany’s father replies. Coach Michaels asks Brittany why Courtney did that. “I don’t know,” Brittany replies. In the next scene, two rival coaches talk about Brittany slowing down. One coach asks, “Why did she do that?” “I don’t know,” the other coach replies. And it just kept going and going until eventually, I wanted to throw something at the TV.

Anyway, my frustrations aside, Courtney is triumphant at the end of the movie, largely because Courtney is perfect and never makes any mistakes. Did I mention how annoying that can get?

This film inspired me to go for a run, if just to have an excuse to stop watching it. And, before anyone asks, I do not like carrots.