Catching Up With The Films of 2023: Golda (dir by Guy Nattiv)


In Golda, Helen Mirren stars as Golda Meir, the 4th Prime Minister of Israel and the first woman to lead a government in the Middle East.

The film opens in 1974, with a visibly unwell Golda Meir braving a line of protestors as she testified before a commission that is investigating the events that led to the 19-day Yom Kippur War.  Sitting before the members of the commission, Meir lights a cigarette and, as the smoke forms around her, she speaks with a confidence that belies her physical frailness.  It’s the first of many cigarettes that we will see Golda Meir smoke throughout this film.  While Golda Meir was known for being a chain-smoker in real life, her smoking also plays an important thematic role in the film.  Golda Meir is terminally ill throughout the film, secretly undergoing chemotherapy and continually being told that her high-stress job, her cigarettes, and her coffee are not helping her health.  Golda, however, knows what she has to do to keep herself focuses and to handle the stress of being the leader of a small country that is surrounded by enemies and for her, that means drinking a lot of coffee and smoking a lot of cigarettes.  Much like Israel, she is not going to be told what to do by people who do not understand what she has to deal with on a daily basis.  Throughout the film, Golda willingly sacrifices her physical health for Israel, telling her more trusted aide (Camille Cattin) that the only thing that worries her is developing dementia in her old age.  A leader who cannot think cannot lead.

The majority of the film takes place in 1973, during the 19-day Yom Kippur War.  Israel is caught off-guard by a surprise attack led by Egypt and Syria.  Vastly outnumbered, the IDF struggles to repel the invaders.  While dealing with not only her own bad health but also the personal and ideological conflicts within her government, Meir also reaches out to the U.S. Secretary of State, Henry Kissinger (Liev Schreiber) for help.   Unfortunately, Washington D.C. is more concerned with Watergate than with the latest war in the Middle East and, as Meir quickly deduces, there is also worry that Saudi Arabia will cut off its supply of oil to any country that supports Israel.  Though Meir uses a combination of charm and shrewd political gamesmanship to convince Kissinger to put pressure on the Nixon administration, Meir still finds herself being pressured to accept an internationally-brokered ceasefire rather than pursue a strategy of forcing Egypt into negotiations….

Does this sound familiar?  A vicious surprise attack is launched on Israel during a holy day.  The Israeli Prime Minister, who is loved by some and vilified by others, is accused of not being sufficiently prepared for the attack.  Israel is initially isolated from the world, just to be pressured to accept a ceasefire as soon as it starts to prove its resiliency and humiliate its enemies.  Golda completed production before the October 7th attacks but the film feels like a direct response to them, a reminder that Israel has always had to fight for its existence and that it has always proven itself to be stronger than its enemies realize.

Much like Darkest Hour, another film about a leader who was underestimated, Golda plays out like a dream of history, with the emphasis being on Golda Meir moving from one meeting to another, somehow managing to hold everything together while the world sometimes seem to be falling apart around her.  A good deal of the film’s tension comes from the moments when Golda and her advisors wait to hear whether or not their latest move has been a success.  One of the film’s most harrowing scenes features Golda listening over a radio as a group of Israeli volunteers are wiped out by the invading Egyptians.  It’s a scene that reiterates the human cost of war, regardless of which side wins.  (The film makes good use of historical footage of the war, mixing it with scenes of Golda and her cabinet planning their strategy.  Again, it serves to remind the audience that there are real consequences to every decision.)  Held together by Mirren’s intelligent and authoritative performance, Golda is a film full of details that stick with you.  I’ll always remember the scenes of Golda being led through an underground morgue so that she can secretly be treated for the cancer that is slowly killing her.  With each trip, the morgue become more and more filled with bodies.

Though Mirren’s performance was acclaimed, Golda itself opened to mixed reviews.  I suppose in today’s political atmosphere, that’s to be expected.  After all, Golda is not only a pro-Israel film but it’s also a film that portrays Henry Kissinger as being something other than a one-dimensional Bond villain.  For many of today’s very online film reviewers, all of that is heresy.  At a time when some so-called educated people are driven to a rage at just the sight of posters of abducted Israeli children, Golda‘s reception is not a surprise.  At a time when people are making excuses for terrorists who would attack farmers and concert-goers, a films as otherwise different as You Are So Not Invited To My Bat Mitzvah and Golda can feel like acts of beautiful cultural defiance.

History repeats itself, Golda tells us.  Golda may largely take place in 1973 but, ultimately, it’s a film about 2023 and 2024.

Retro Television Reviews: Fantasy Island 4.8 “Crescendo/Three Feathers”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1986.  Almost the entire show is currently streaming is on Youtube, Daily Motion, and a few other sites.

This week, we get one good fantasy and one bad fantasy and a reminder that anything can happen on Fantasy Island!

Episode 4.8 “Crescendo/Three Feathers”

(Dir by Michael Preece, originally aired on December 20th, 1980)

This episode confirms that Fantasy Island is the strangest place on Earth.

Our first fantasy features Toni Tennille as a world-famous singer named Susan Lohmann.  Susan has been invited meet her favorite composer and songwriter, Edmund Dumont (Monte Markham).  Dumont lives in seclusion on Fantasy Island, in an estate that is surrounded by wild animals and where he is tended by a blind butler (James Hong).

Susan is excited to meet Edmund, until she walks in on him playing his piano and discovers that he’s a …. BEAST!  Though he has the body of a human, he has the face of a wolf.  It turns out that Edmund lives in seclusion because he feels that the world would never accept his appearance.  And Susan promptly proves him correct by screaming and demanding to leave.  Susan flees the estate.

Susan’s manager is glad that Susan is free because now she can appear in concert in London.  However, Mr. Roarke informs Susan that Edmund suffers from a curse and the only thing that could have cured him would have been the love of Susan.  Edmund is now determined to die, surrounded by the animals on his estate, the only creatures who accepted him.  Susan, realizing that she was a little bit hard on a guy who couldn’t help his appearance, returns to the estate, gives Edmund a kiss, and Edmund turns into a handsome guy.  Yay!

So, there’s a huge problem here.  Susan Lohmann is incredibly unlikable.  Yes, Edmund may look different.  But all Edmund did was invited her to his estate so that he could express his appreciation for the way the she sings his songs.  Susan claims that Edmund should have told her, in advance, about the way he looked.  Yes, Susan, God forbid someone unattractive appreciate your talent or have any talent of his own.  Seriously, Susan was the worst.

Slightly more likable is Alan Colshaw (Hugh O’Brian), a pilot who has spent a year feeling like a coward.  He was piloting a plane that crashed in the jungle.  Alan went for help and, according to the three other passengers (played by Diane Baker, James Wainwright, and Peter Lawford), he never returned and, instead, he ran off with a stash of diamonds that was on the plane.  Alan says that he is sure he didn’t intentionally desert them but he can’t remember for sure because he’s been suffering from memory loss.

Mr. Roarke gives Alan a medallion, one that will allow him and the others to see what happened when the plane crashed.  As for Alan, he brings along three white feathers, which he plans to give to each of the survivors as a way to symbolize that he’s not the coward that they think he is.  (Yes, it doesn’t make much sense to me, either.)

Lena (Diane Baker) is the first to forgive Alan.  Alan realizes that he’s in love with Lena and he tells Mr. Roarke that he wants to change his fantasy.  He just wants to spend the rest of his life with Lena.  Roarke informs Alan that he can’t do that because …. ALAN IS DEAD!  He died while trying to get help after the crash.  Alan has come back to life for the weekend so that his spirit can find peace.

That’s a pretty neat twist and, to its credit, the show sticks with it.  Alan eventually proves that he wasn’t a coward and that another one of the passengers stole the diamonds and then he vanishes into the afterlife.

“Boss,” Tattoo says, “you mean he was a …. g-g-ghost!?”

“Oh, Tattoo!” Roarke snaps, “Please do not tell me that you are prejudiced!”

Fantasy Island may be a strange place but some things — like Roarke passive aggressively attacking Tattoo — never change.

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: CHiPs 1.9 “Hustle”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee!

This week, Ponch gets bowling fever!

Episode 1.9 “Hustle”

(Dir by Georg Fenady, originally aired on November 24th, 1977)

Life is a hustle when you work for the California Highway Patrol.

Ponch and Baker deal with a lot of things over the course of this episode.  While pursuing two motorcycle riders who are suspected of holding up a grocery store, Ponch gets a cigarette tossed on him by a passing motorist.  The suspects turn out to be two women who were just out for an afternoon ride.  They seem to be pretty amused by the whole thing, despite the fact that Baker roughly frisked them as soon as they pulled over.  Luckily, the sight of the hole that was left on Ponch’s uniform by the cigarette (and the boxers underneath) gives everyone an excuse to laugh.

This is not the best time for Ponch to have a wardrobe malfunction because he’s due in court.  Ponch gave a ticket to Sidney Engelhart (Marty Ingels) but Sidney claims that the only person who is guilty of reckless driving is Ponch.  Sidney tries to prove his point by basically stalking Ponch while he does his job.

While Ponch deals with his stalker, Baker pulls over a car being driven by veteran screen actor Broderick Crawford.  Ponch is totally excited to see Crawford but Baker is fairly nonchalant about the whole thing.  When his pen runs out of ink, Baker borrows Crawford’s gold fountain pen and then forgets to return it to the actor, which leads to Baker getting called out at the next morning briefing.

Meanwhile, there’s a huge car accident that leads to Ponch and Baker saving a mother and her baby from a live electrical wire.  Baker also pulls over a man driving a car that only has three wheels and, of course, there are the grocery store robbers to deal with.

And yet, for everything going on, Ponch’s main concern remains the department’s bowling tournament.  As has been a consistent theme so far during the first season of CHiPs, Ponch’s main concern continues to be doing things that don’t have much to do with his actual job.  Whereas Baker comes across as if nothing makes him happier than writing a speeding ticket, Ponch often seems to view policework as something to do until something better comes along.  On the one hand, this does not make Ponch a particularly effective cop.  We’re only 9 episodes into the series and I’ve lost count of the number of times that he’s had to go back to the trailer park to change his uniform.  On the other hand, it is probably a realistic portrayal of how most people view their jobs.  Ponch does enough to get by.

As for the episode itself, this was another “day-in-the-life” style episode.  So far, the first season of CHiPs has been dominated by rather loose plotting.  Ponch and Baker just ride and see what type of trouble they can find on the highways.  As for the bowling subplot, Baker turns out to be a surprisingly competent bowler and Ponch plots to win a lot of money from his fellow officers.  But then Baker sprains his bowling fingers and it looks like Ponch is once again out of a small fortune.  Poor Ponch, he is fortune’s fool!

(I actually have gone bowling a few times.  I’m not any good at it but I’ve been told that the important thing is to jump up and down regardless of what happens.)

This Hustle, I would give a solid B.  The scenery was nice.  There was an exciting motorcycle chase at the start of the show.  The episode was a pleasant-enough diversion, albeit not one that leaves a huge impression afterwards.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 1.17 “The Maze”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

It was not easy but I managed to rouse myself from my sickbed long enough to stumble into my home office so I could watch and review this week’s episode of Miami Vice!

Episode 1.17 “The Maze”

(Dir by Tim Zinnemann, originally aired on February 22nd, 1985)

This episode of Miami Vice gets off to a good start, with an exciting and, even by the standards of today, surprisingly violent shoot-out in downtown Miami.  The shoot-out leaves one cop dead, one partner embittered, and Crockett and Tubbs looking for the perpetrators, the Escobars.  As Tubbs explains it, the Escobars were strictly small-timers but it appears that they’ve recently gotten out of prison and now they are trying to make a name for themselves in Miami.

The search for the Escobars leads Crockett and Tubbs to a seemingly abandoned apartment building that has been nicknamed “The Maze.”  The Escobars have taken over the building and now, the handful of people who were previously living in the Maze are virtual hostages.  With the police surrounding the Maze, Tubbs decides to go undercover as a drifter who just happens to drop by the Maze in search of a place to stay.  Of course, no sooner has Tubbs entered into the Maze then a renegade cop named Duryea (Jay O. Sanders) decides to rush the building himself and the police are forced to reveal themselves.  Realizing that they’re surrounded, the Escobars demand a helicopter to the Bahamas and $10,000.  (Personally, I think they should have just asked for the helicopter.  People will give up helicopters much quicker than money.)  They hold every person in the building hostage, including Tubbs.

As I previously mentioned while reviewing T and T, I’m not a fan of shows that center around hostage situations, largely because they almost always end up being dramatically inert.  There’s only so many times that you can watch a sweaty criminal demand a helicopter before you get bored with listening to him.  That is certainly the case here.  The show gets off to a good start and even the scenes with Tubbs breaking into the Maze and pretending to be a Jamaican drifter had some flair to them.  But once the tense hostage situation started up, I got bored.  I appreciated the fact that the Escobars, as opposes to being hardened criminals, were really just as scared as the people they were holding hostage but otherwise, this episode was just a bit too slow for me.

That said, this episode does feature Breakin 2‘s Adolfo ‘Shabba-Doo’ Quinones as a dancing informant, early performances from Joe Morton and Ving Rahmes, and a really cool moment where Tubbs smirks and says, “Nobody’s going to the Bahamas.”  Even a lesser episode of Miami Vice still had style to burn.

Retro Television Reviews: Death Cruise (dir by Ralph Senesky)


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay.  Today’s film is 1977’s Death Cruise!  It  can be viewed on Tubi and YouTube.

The thing with the Love Boat is that it promises something for everyone.  It’s a place where you set a course for adventure and put your mind on a new romance.

The same cannot be said of the Death Cruise.

Death Cruise opens with three couples winning an all-expenses paid trip on a luxury liner.  None of the couples are in a happy marriage.  Sylvia Carter (Polly Bergen) is tired of her husband, Jerry (Richard Long), and his philandering ways.  Elizabeth Mason (Celeste Holm) is frustrated with David Mason (Tom Bosley) and his loud dinner jackets.  Mary Frances Radney (Kate Jackson) is fed up with James (Edward Albert) and his smug refusal to start a family.  Of course, it’s not just martial problems that connects these passengers.  It’s also the fact that someone on the boat is stalking and killing them, one-by-one.  Can Dr. Burke (Michael Constantine) and Captain Vettori (Cesare Danova) track down the killer before it’s too late?

Death Cruise is an enjoyably twisty little murder mystery.  It aired in 1974, a good two years before the first Love Boat pilot film appeared on television.  However, both Death Cruise and The Love Boat were produced by Aaron Spelling so the two productions definitely have a shared DNA.  The Love Boat is basically Death Cruise with the addition of a laugh track and considerably less murder.  That said, I have my doubts as to whether Doc Bricker would have been as effective a detective as Dr. Burke.

One of the most interesting things about Death Cruise is how little anyone on the boat really seems to care about the fact that the passengers are turning up dead.  In fact, one widower is asking a widow to be his date to dinner within a few hours of the deaths of their spouses.  Of course, the murderer makes sure that dinner date is canceled but it’s still hard not to wonder whatever happened to an appropriate time of grieving.  Then again, I guess if you’re on a boat for a weekend, you just do whatever feels right at the moment.

(And certainly, if they were on The Love Boat, the walking HR nightmares that was Doc Bricker wouldn’t have wasted any time asking the widows to come by his office for a examination.)

Of the victims and suspects, Richard Long and Edward Albert are memorably sleazy while Tom Bosley plays up just how annoyed he is with the whole situation.  Michael Constantine is a good detective and the movie’s final twist is nicely executed.  Personally, when it comes to cruises, I will always prefer the safety and romance of The Love Boat but Death Cruise was an entertaining nautical diversion.

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Check It Out! 1.13 “Love Is A Many Splendored Alf”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, my favorite character returns!

Episode 1.13 “Love Is A Many Splendored Alf”

(Dir by John Bell, originally aired on January 8th, 1986)

Viker’s back!

Played by Gordon Clapp, Viker is the store’s electrician.  He’s only appeared in a handful of episodes this season, though Wikipedia says that he’ll become a regular during season 2.  Viker is one of the best characters on the show.  Technically, he’s the goofy dumb guy but what makes Viker special is that, while he’s definitely goofy, he’s not really that dumb.  Viker can put his thoughts together, it’s just that he put them together differently than everyone around him.  Viker lives in a world of his own, one that has its own peculiar set of rules.  Alone amongst all the characters on the show, Viker is always honest and tries to directly answer every question that he’s asked.  For instance, when Howard asks him if he has an idea as to what is making the store’s light flicker on and off, Viker replies, “Yes,” and leaves it at that.  Howard, after all, didn’t ask him what the idea is.

Viker is at the store because Cobb’s is having electrical problems.  The lights are flickering on and off.  (It takes Viker a few minutes to notice because, as he explains, his blinking his synchronized with the flickering.)  The cash registers are humming.  The refrigerator in the break room has broken down.  The store’s freezer also breaks down, leading 800 pounds of melted ice cream and a bunch of TV dinner rotting in an alley.  Can Viker figure out what the problem is?

No, of course, he can’t.  Fortunately, Alf the Security Guard can.  When Alf gives the broken refrigerator a good slap, the refrigerator comes back to life and the lights stop flickering.  So, I guess it was all the refrigerator’s fault!  To be honest, I don’t know much about how things are wired in most stores but …. well, let’s just go with it.

Alf …. poor Alf!  Alf has a tough week in this episode.  Edna sets Alf up on a date with her friend Helen (Nonnie Griffith).  Helen likes that Alf is a plain-spoken, blue collar guy.  Helen is less impressed when Alf gets drunk on their date and tries to crack open his escargot.  She is especially not happy when he pours a pitcher of water on the flambé.  After the disastrous date, Alf is convinced that he’ll never see Helen again.  Fortunately, for Alf, Helen just happens to be in the store when he gets the refrigerator working and basically saves everyone’s job.  Helen is impressed enough to give Alf a second chance.  Awwwww!

(In other words, it’s a good thing Viker couldn’t figure out what the problem was!)

As far as this episode goes, I never really believed that Helen would have been attracted to Alf in the first place so that story kind of fell flat.  And seriously, if you’re dating a guy because you like how direct and blue collar he is, what are you thinking serving him escargot and flambé?  But I was happy to see Viker again and I appreciated that this was an episode where everyone in the store acted as eccentrically as possible.  Check It Out! works best when it leans into absurdism.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 12/31/23 — 1/6/24


Happy 2024!

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)

I wrote about Baywatch Nights here!

Check It Out! (Tubi)

My review of this week’s episode will be dropping soon.

CHiPs (Freevee)

I wrote about CHiPs here!

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

I watched way too much Dr. Phil this week.  Most of them were episodes that I had already seen before and, as I sit here writing this up just 30 minutes before deadline, I’m struggling to remember much about any of them.  I do remember that I rewatched the Truthfully Tricia episode.  That was a wild one.  As obnoxious as Tricia was, I do feel that Phil went out of his way to goad her into having a meltdown on his stage.  I mean, he really wanted her to do the dramatic walk-off.

Fantasy Island (YouTube)

I wrote about Fantasy Island here!

Forgive or Forget (YouTube)

“I can forgive but I will not forget!”

Uhmm, it sounds like someone needs to look at the name of the show that they’re on.  Pick one or the other!

Friday the 13th: The Series (YouTube)

I wrote about Friday the 13th here!

Hell’s Kitchen (Thursday Night, FOX)

I’m so glad Ryan got a black jacket!  I know that Chef Ramsay said that he saw a lot of improvement in Jason and maybe he did and it was just edited out.  Just from watching the show, it’s easy to get the feeling they kept Jason around for as long as they did because they needed a good villain.  But, at the same time, Chef Ramsay isn’t really one to throw around false praise, either.  His brand is being critical and angry so, when he’s not, that usually means something.

Highway to Heaven (Tubi)

I wrote about Highway to Heaven here!

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I wrote about The Love Boat here!

Miami Vice (Tubi)

I wrote about Miami Vice here!

Monsters (Tubi)

I wrote about Monsters here!

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday night, I watched an episode that was all about songs from the 80s that were about working out and the human body.  I followed this with an episode about the best indie music videos of 2023.  Some of the videos were really good!

Password (Weekday afternoons, BUZZR)

I watched two episodes of this extremely frustrating old game show on Tuesday.  Like seriously, how hard was it to guess some of those passwords that they used on that show?

Tattletales (Weekday Mornings, BUZZR)

I watched two episodes of this old game show on Tuesday.  William Shatner and his then-wife were on one episode.  They didn’t do very well.

Turn-On (YouTube)

I wrote about Turn-On here.  I thought I was done with Turn-On but a friend in Australia informs me that it turns out that the unaired second episode is also on YouTube.  And, as we all know, I am a completist….

Twilight Zone (Monday, SyFy and H&I)

The New Year’s Twilight Zone marathon finished up on Monday.  What a great show!  I think The Monsters Are Due On Maple Street is one of the most perfect 30 minute programs ever aired.  I also love the episode where Dennis Weaver keeps having the same dream over and over again.

Welcome Back Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back Kotter here!

 

 

Retro Television Reviews: Welcome Back Kotter 3.4 “The Visitors”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC  from 1975 to 1979.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Julie and the twins return home!

Episode 3.4 “The Visitors”

(Dir by Bob Claver, originally aired on September 22nd, 1977)

Julie and the twins are home!

Soon after arriving at the apartment, Julie and Gabe start to argue over what to name the babies.  Gabe suggests that they name them This One and That One.  Gabe also suggests that they name them Ethel and Lucy.  Julie, not being a fan of television or comedy in general (which makes it a bit odd that she ended up married to Gabe), suggests that they name the babies after their grandmothers, Rachel and Robin.

Speaking of grandparents, Julie’s mother and father show up unannounced.  Mr. Hansen (Jack Dodson) and his wife (Alice Backes) are from Nebraska and they don’t know much about city folks or Sweathogs or apartment buildings.  The Hansens actually appear to be extremely nice and polite but Gabe also immediately starts to complain about them staying at the apartment.  Yeah, Gabe …. I guess it’s not fun when visitors show up at random and then just decide to hang out.

Speaking of which, the Sweathogs also show up at the apartment.  Unfortunately, because Barbarino is stuck in the 10th Grade until he can pass a makeup exam, they are without their leader.  Watching this episode made me realize just how important Barbarino was to the Sweathogs.  Though John Travolta does appear in this episode, he doesn’t share any scenes with the other Sweathogs and without Travolta’s likeable screen presence to ground them, the other Sweathogs are just too weird to believably function as a group.  It was halfway through this episode that I found myself wondering if Epstein and Washington would actually hang out with Horshack if Vinnie wasn’t around to tell them to do so.

With Gabe gone, the responsibility for teaching his class falls to Mr. Woodman.  The students are bored with Woodman as a teacher but Woodman doesn’t care.  Woodman doesn’t care about much of anything, which makes it all the more heart-warming when he shows up at the Kotter apartment and proves himself to be a natural when it comes to taking care of babies.  Woodman was usually such an bitter character that it’s impossible not to smile when you see how much he seems to sincerely like talking to one of the Kotter twins.

Woodman proves himself to be not such a bad guy but telling Kotter than he’ll give Barbarino a makeup exam and allow him to join the 11th Grade if he passes.  “But if he fails by one point,” Woodman says, “he stays in the 10th Grade.”

“Did I ever tell you about my uncle who was in the 10th Grade for three years?” Gabe replies.

Woodman says that he’s willing to bring gifts to the babies and give Vinnie a makeup exam but “I will not listen to one of your uncle stories.”

And that’s it for this episode!  This episode was pretty slight, with characters randomly coming in and out of the Kotter apartment and getting on Julie’s nerves.  I’m going to assume that Barbarino’s absence from much of the episode was due to Travolta’s burgeoning film career as opposed to Barbarino being held back a grade.  (Barbarino better pass that exam.  The Sweathogs need their leader!)  That said, the bit at the end with Woodman was funny and full of heart so I’ll give this episode a solid B.

Next week: Gabe and Barbarino buy a lottery ticket!