Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. – The Mega-Recap


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I have failed you, dear readers. I have failed you in my solemn commitment to share the odyssey of Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.. I have failed in my grim responsibility to recap them without snark or sarcasm each week. And I have failed you utterly with regards to knowing when the show is going to air, and on what Tuesdays. There is no one to blame but me for my having fallen behind. One mis-step begat another, and another, until now… finally, we arrive here. To borrow a term and use it in an amusing way, here, at the Magical Place.

But do not fear!

For this MEGA-RECAP will connect the dots of this complex and sophisticated story the innermost twists and turns of which need to be absorbed over repeated viewings and recorded for your reference in this space… Here, I will connect for you the lines between S1E12 “Seeds”… all the way up to 4/1/2014 (oh God)… M.A.O.S. Probably too many acronyms floating around here, but that’s just a thought. Together, let us voyage through the complex storylines, elaborate characterizations, and non-ridicu… well. At any rate. I’ll provide a brief recap of what you might have missed… or not.

For your convenience, I have organized this Mega-Recap in this fashion, so you can bounce around if you wish:
S01E13 will take you to the first episode of the recap, T.R.A.C.K.S.
S01E14 summons forth T.A.H.I.T.I.
S01E15 will show you Yes Men

Mega this recap might be, but I have steeled myself to show more discipline and condense each episode somewhat. Apologies in advance, dear readers, because I know that this may necessitate leaving out some of the grand complexity of each of these totally unique and not-at-all formulaic episodes. In the future, I shall endeavour to do better for you. Well.

That elaborate housekeeping having been taken care of… enjoy? Enjoy!

S01E13

T.R.A.C.K.S.

Yes, it’s Ian Quinn (David Conrad) again. One of the few things that I feel this series has actually done pretty well so far is in providing us with some comic book style ‘mastermind’ villains. We have the still-enigmatic Clairvoyant, and Ian Quinn, Corporate Asshole. Having guys blow their money on evil is a grand comic tradition, and one that is certainly welcome here. Quinn is so off-putting that I enjoy him as a villain, and I’m looking forward to Agent Wooden and Agent Handsome delivering a series of punches and kicks to his face and torso. But that’s for another time, alas…

This time, the dastardly Ian Quinn has purchased something from a company called CyberTek for the low, low price of $10 million. I assume all figures are in U.S. dollars, so maybe it’s not actually that much. It’s being transported on a train through the Italian countryside, under the watchful supervision of Ian Quinn’s number one security guy. Coulson successfully negotiated (read: waved S.H.I.E.L.D.’s carte blanche around) to get the Italian police off the investigation, and Level 7 onto it. In lieu of letting the proper authorities handle things, Coulson’s team is going to infiltrate the train undercover in three different groups. Group 1 consists of agents May and Ward. She’s playing a cold, sneering aristocrat type, who says little, but radiates contempt with her eyes while he carries the luggage. Oh, and they’re married. This is such a departure from their normal characters, that I… ah, nevermind.

Team two is Simmons and Coulson as a father daughter pair. This pairing is engaging. Simmons thinks very poorly on her feet, so in preparation for being undercover, she’s given her character a ten page backstory about an absentee father and a strained relationship. Stan Lee makes his totally inevitable cameo here, berating Coulson for his failures as a father. Team three is Fitz and Skye as young lovers. Skye is charming and beautiful, Fitz is awkward. Giving these two more screen time seems like a way to try and find some male character that Skye actually has some chemistry with. Fitz and Skye aren’t bad together… it’s certainly better than some of the cringe-worthy scenes between Skye and Ward earlier in the season.

Oh, and May tells Ward that she told Coulson about them having clinically precise sex. Ward is alarmed, but we already know Coulson is cool. Guy’s not gonna make waves. I mean, he didn’t even make waves over the forty thousand different ways that S.H.I.E.L.D. screwed him on the whole ‘involuntary resurrection’ thing and the whole ‘without his consent’ affair. That Nick Fury. What a goof!

Things go pretty much how you’d expect. In his conductor disguise, Ward quickly dispatches two assassins in a quick sequence even James Bond would have been proud of. Realizing they’re made, he sends Simmons to meet up with Fitz and Skye. Coulson and Ward get made and bail out of the train, and Quinn’s agents turn the train invisible… wait what? Commercials! By the way, I want to give some credit to the storyboarding on this one… aside from a bunch of quick cuts to set up our premise, we barely had any jarring scene changes at all. Good work, guys!

So dudes in black SUVs are already after Coulson and Ward. Seems like someone probably gave them up. I WONDER WHO IT COULD HAVE BEEN? On the ActionPlane Coulson contacts his boy with the Italian polizia, Russo (Carlo Rota). Russo’s guys got jumped too, it seems, and they’re dead. Coulson explains that the train became invisible, and Russo seems weirdly unimpressed. Well, I’m sure that happens all the time in Italy. Coulson and Ward try and figure out what to do next, but between them they can’t even figure out how to work the computer. They talk about the whole Ward/May wooden lovemaking situation. Coulson berates Ward, then makes fun of him. It is enjoyable. Then suddenly Russo shows up at the landing ramp to the ActionPlane. Before he can do much more than say hello, he gets the old ‘lethal axe in the spine’ from a beaten, bloody Agent May. With a subtle hint of anger (reaaaaaaaaaaaaal subtle), May says “Wheels up in five.” Boom.

It turns out that May also fell off the train. Got captured by Russo. He was going to torture and presumably kill her, but May is kind of a badass. She escaped, facilitated the escape of Ward and Coulson. Now we know why she killed Russo. Good times!

On the train, Skye and Fitz debate the nature of the object being transported. Skye wonders if it could be an ‘084’, an ‘object of unknown origin’. Fitz says no, definitely an item supplied by Cybertek. Some light exposition. Then the jamming hits. Everything’s offline. What? We’ve been made? Security guys burst into the train car. Fitz downs one with a blindfire (good shot, Fitz!) and then Skye does more than enough to disable a comic mook, but since she’s a girl, he’s unaffected and knocks her down. Then, because Fitz is a geek and can’t fight, he goes sprawling as well. It’s at this time that Simmons arrives, and Skye comes back to her feet armed and dangerous. Unfortunately, because Skye and Simmons are both girls, Skye doesn’t shoot, and Simmons then grapples vainly with the mook until his grenade goes off… uhh.. “disabling”… them both. Seriously, is there any doubt that a male agent would have handled these two mooks? It doesn’t even have to be James Bond. But poor Skye gets manhandled even after ambushing the dude, clubbing him, and basically working his shit. He’s just a mook! Luckily the grenade was more of the ‘stun’ variety – using the same technobabble (biobabble? it’s a toxin, they claim) that makes the S.H.I.E.L.D. magic sleep gun (or night-night gun, as the parlance goes) work. Oh, then Fitz shoots the mook. Good on you, Fitz.

The train stops. Outside, a bunch of suits make the exchange. Skye demands that they follow the mysterious Cybertek item, so they do. Arriving at a magnificently-appointed Tuscan villa. Apparently these are just ubiquitous when dealing with Ian Quinn. You have to admire the man’s style. Fitz goes to disable enemy vehicles, while Skye goes into infiltration mode. Again! This is so exciting! Skye sneaks her way into the basement. Something tells me it’s just about time for the big reveal. OH SHIT IT’S MIKE PETERSON (J. August Richards)! He’s in, like, a healing tube or something. Then Ian Quinn shows up. He’s feeling smug. Quinn pops the tube. Not only is Peterson alive, but he’s kind of well. His face is badly mutilated. And the expensive technology from CyberTek proves to be a cybernetic leg to replace the one he lost in the explosion during the events of S1E10 “The Bridge”. Savvier folks than I point this out as the rise of “Deathlok”, a comic character. Good on Deathlok!

Peterson is thoroughly under enemy control. Quinn exults in his power, saying that Peterson can’t hurt him, and that he won’t stop Quinn from shooting him. Skye tries to negotiate with Mike’s better nature. Quinn tries to convince Mike to attack Skye, but he refuses. Instead, Quinn simply shoots her. Then, he shoots her again. Then, he bounces. Boom. My heart is ready to explode. Skye!? Nooooo! She was so charming! Taken before her time! Aaaargggh!

Anyway, in the finale… Peterson kills off all the Cybertek suits. No surprise there, Quinn doesn’t want to pay for the hardware. ActionTeam arrives though, before Skye expires. Peterson has orders not to engage S.H.I.E.L.D., Ward does one of my favourite cinema tricks where a guy with two guns can shoot as many normal mooks as he wants until he runs out of ammo before they can react, and the ActionTeam actually captures Ian Quinn! Coulson demands Skye’s whereabouts. When Quinn is glib, Coulson pistol whips that motherfucker! Yeah, Coulson! They find her, of course, but she’s in bad, bad shape. They put her in the healing tube at Simmons’ urgent instructions, and kind of… hope for the best. May sounds… strained. Upset. As she demands if it’s working. Coulson is a little more emphatic. It’s… a stunningly emotional moment for this show. Back on the ActionPlane, Simmons’ diagnosis is grim… but not definitive. The reaction shots are just as grim. Level 7 Vendetta, yo. May and Ward share a moment that could actually be called… emotional? Coulson remains in vigil beside the magic healing tube. Simmons sobs in Fitz’s arms. Ouch.

In the coda, Peterson falls back on his need to reconnect with his son. The Clairvoyant isn’t going for it. Someone pointed out (it may even have been the ABC synopsis?) that his prosthesis has ‘Project Deathlok’ inscribed on it. Well then!

Guys, this episode is WELL above average. I hope you didn’t abandon the show before seeing this one. It’s a good action piece, with plenty of stuff going on, some great Skye moments, and a lot more… emotion… than I’m used to seeing from this show. If every episode was as well conceived as this one, I probably wouldn’t have nearly so easy a time making fun of it. So I guess that would make the show poorer for me, but better for mankind. I will make this trade, showrunners. Jed Whedon, it is not too late!

S01E14

T.A.H.I.T.I.
(Seriously guys, what’s with the acronyms? Is it supposed to be funny?)

Cold Open: Once again, Ron Glass regrets the whole ‘without consent’ and ‘cruel reanimation’ parts of Coulson’s past. If you forgot since the previous recap… which was… ten lines above… Skye is in critical condition. At best. Let’s roll!

We’re in the S.H.I.E.L.D. hospital. Presumably, there is no better care that Skye could receive than this. Coulson is attempting to call Nick Fury. I assume because Sam Jackson wasn’t available, he’s on hold. Fitz blames himself, but Simmons laughs: “Like you could stop her from doing something she wanted to”. Good point, Simmons. Ward is her “SO” (what does that even mean? I know he’s not the CO. I guess he’s not the XO. Supervising officer? The hierarchy of S.H.I.E.L.D. isn’t that clear). He’s mad too. May blames Ian Quinn. Logical!

At the hospital, the doctors are telling Coulson that it’s time to decide whether to keep Skye on life support, and that her family should be contacted. Coulson breathes… is distressed… “We’re her family”… it’s kind of a tough scene. SCENE CHANGE! (It’s back!)

May kicks the shit out of Ian Quinn. “Wait, you can’t…” “Why, because you’re defenseless? Like she was?” Anger suits the character of Agent May. She seems comfortable in its embrace. Then she seems… emotional, after Coulson stops her. Coulson reminds May that the doctors at S.H.I.E.L.D. literally re-animated his corpse. Surely they can save Skye. Meanwhile, May needs to pilot the ActionPlane. Also, ActionTeam isn’t giving up custody of Quinn. Also, Coulson finally explains the truth of his return to life to the rest of the ActionTeam. It was at the S.H.I.E.L.D. facility in Bethesda, Maryland, where it was done. So, they’re bringing Skye to the same facility. Coulson delivers the full medical report on what was done to him to Fitz-Simmons, explaining that since Shepard Book managed to repair his heart after it was literally torn in half, if they can understand how that process worked… surely they can heal Skye’s injuries as well.

Ward and May, neither of them, would have flown halfway around the world in a desperate and probably ridiculous attempt to save Skye’s life. May points out that she and Ward need people like Coulson. Come to think, that’s probably why Phil’s in charge of this outfit, seniority aside. Oh, and they violated some S.H.I.E.L.D. bylaws or something, so they’re being ordered to stand by and prepare to be boarded. I’ve been waiting for one of these episodes, when the inevitable “bad decision makers” or bureaucracy inherent in S.H.I.E.L.D. complicates things. Coulson elucidates the situation nicely: “Really? All the war and chaos in the world, and S.H.I.E.L.D. sends a plane after us?” Guys, I saw The Avengers. Nick Fury doesn’t think like this, except when he does.

The ActionPlane is boarded by Agent John Garrett (a welcome appearance by Bill Paxton). He seems like a jerk. With him is Agent Antoine Triplett (B.J. Britt) who seems like a cool customer. Garrett threatens Coulson because reasons. Oh, for once they’re going to explain this now! Garrett has been pursuing Quinn for some time. He makes a funny, describing the hilariously unsuccessful train job and subsequent Tuscan villa adventure as “your little Italian job”… and also explains that it set his investigation back. How it set him back is really unclear, since Quinn was taken into custody. This part is not addressed, but I’ll live. Anyway, Garrett is surprised to learn that Quinn actually had the guts to shoot someone himself, and explains that he, too, has lost agents in the pursuit, but seems to soften somewhat when Coulson explains about Skye. Trip and Ward know each other. They talk about nonsense downstairs, then things escalate into a totally pointless fistfight (this show is supposed to have action, damnit!) but Coulson breaks it up. He and Garrett came to an agreement. Garrett will interrogate Quinn on board the ActionPlane… and saving Skye is top priority. If only because she might know something essential.

Fitz-Simmons are trying to save her right this very second, of course.

Meanwhile, in the interrogation room / refuge for tormented young women / Mike Peterson chamber / hexagon walled room… Garrett shows up. Quinn is flippant. Garrett literally grabs Quinn’s tongue (yes! Seriously! It’s kind of awesome!) He explains that Quinn has no rights, no lawyer, and the only reason they don’t just throw him out the back of the plane is that Skye is still alive downstairs. Quinn appears to get the message. They talk a little about the Clairvoyant. Garrett calls it mumbo-jumbo, but Quinn cites a number of incidents in which the far-seeing eyes of the Clairvoyant led to disaster for S.H.I.E.L.D. The only thing the Clairvoyant can’t see is how they saved Coulson after his death or near-death or whatever at Loki’s hands. The gist of the plan is, either ActionTeam figures the whole thing out, in which case it’s in the open for the Clairvoyant to see… or they let Skye die. And Coulson obviously isn’t going to let Skye die. That would be ridiculous. She’s charming!

So it turns out that even the facility that Coulson was treated at doesn’t exist, and certainly wasn’t at Bethesda. Simmons admits that even she and Fitz only understand “70%” of what’s in Coulson’s medical records. May’s concerned that they may give the Clairvoyant exactly what he wants, even if they do save Skye. Coulson doesn’t give a shit. Yeah, Coulson, keep it real. Fitz-Simmons start trying to track Ron Glass’ whereabouts from the date that Coulson was stabbed. With some uh… “clever sleuthing”… Fitz-Simmons locates the site at which Coulson’s “treatment” “occurred” and they “head” “that direction”. May stays on the ActionPlane, but Garrett bolsters the away team as Coulson leads a group to investigate “The Guest House”. They don’t know the countersign, so they force entry. I’m sure this will go well.

What? A gun battle? You’re kidding. Coulson throws a flashbang, and it’s pretty much over. Garrett is growing on me. I hope Bill Paxton isn’t too busy to make a couple more appearances on the show.

With the guards down, there’s a countdown timer running to destroy the facility or something. Coulson assigns Garrett to figure out how to get them back out of the secure facility, while the ActionTeam goes in search of drug GH-325. Apparently this was the substance administered to Coulson. Meanwhile, on the ActionPlane, Triplette is being pretty cool. I wouldn’t mind him coming back either. Things are worsening on the ‘Skye’ front though, as she starts to seize. Hope we find that GH-325 Maguffin!

Shockingly, a search of the facility bears fruit. Fitz locates some GH-325 and absconds. Coulson would be right with him… except that he’s spotted a door marked T.A.H.I.T.I. Can that acronym possibly stand for anything? I’m not kidding here. This is getting a little absurd.

ActionTeam escapes the facility. Kind of. Coulson and Garrett are still inside, but whatever. Actually, Garrett goes back for Coulson, who is almost in a trance. He seems alarmed by the idea that Skye might be given GH-325. He’s even more alarmed when he and Garrett board the ActionPlane. Simmons already gave Skye the GH-325. It’s too late. But then … she stabilizes. Thank God. This show really can’t survive without her, unless we get a lot more Bill Paxton. Everyone’s happy except Coulson, who seems even more alarmed. This would be a great time for the show to explain things to us.

Garrett and Triplette take possession of Quinn. It’s kind of epic. Garrett and Coulson talk things out. As Garrett absconds, I pray for more Bill Paxton in our future. Please, Jed Whedon, deliver unto us more entertaining guest characters. Now that Ian Quinn is presumably gone (until his miraculous escape, or whatever), we need more entertaining guest characters.

Behind the T.A.H.I.T.I. door… Coulson is a little traumatized to discover half of a blue man hooked up to machines. Or something. The meaning of this isn’t real clear. Coulson’s explanation of his panic to May is that he didn’t want Skye to suffer, but that she didn’t, so he’s cool now. Dude isn’t gonna make waves.

Coda: Meet Lorelei (Elena Satine). For those who don’t know, “Lorelei” is the name of both an Asgardian in Marvel comics… and, probably more importantly, a Germanic myth similar to the Greek ‘Siren’ myth. Oh, and the Asgardian in Marvel? Based on that same German myth. I’ll let you guess what that probably means.

S01E15

“Yes Men”

Previously On: Blah blah blah. I just recapped two episodes. Surely you didn’t miss anything important?

Cold Open: Lorelei (Elena Satine) and her boy toy (Robert Belushi) show up at a truck stop. She sirens up a biker leader named Rooster (Dylan Bruno). Then she murders the crap out of the newlywed she siren’d up at the end of T.A.H.I.T.I. Asgard!

Act I: Skye is alive! And … ambulatory! Thank God. I missed her. Simmons is determined to keep poor Skye in bed. There’s a little banter, but what it boils down to is that Skye is alive, and she’s the most gratefulest. It’s not a real word, but I bet you know what it means! There’s some awkward conversation between Skye and Ward. I’m not sure what the point of all this is. I mean, Ward is her “SO” and all… but this conversation is kind of dumb. It has some exposition in it, though. Skye wants to do some more training. She wants to become a badass. I am glad. They also remind us about the whole Mike Peterson subplot. So that’s still going on.

Coulson is trying to locate Nick Fury. He has an incredibly low-profile conversation between incredibly low-profile S.H.I.E.L.D. ActionMobiles. Shockingly, Nick Fury is missing? Has disppeared? Doesn’t want people to know where he is? I’m sure this will be going on. Also, Fitz-Simmons have detected Asgardian Magic. An Asgardian is about. “Asgardians are allies!” “Loki wasn’t”. Thanks, guys. Shortly thereafter, a half dozen totally inconspicuous S.H.I.E.L.D. ActionMobiles driving down the road stop when there’s a burst of incredible energy, and in a flash of awesomeness… the Lady Sif (Jaimie Alexander, reprising her film character) appears! In a crater! In the highway! She doesn’t waste much time announcing that Earth is in great danger.

Commercials!

May’s worried about Coulson, but the thing is, Sif’s worried about Earth. Speaking of Sif, she’s shocked to see Agent Coulson still alive. She’d heard him slain at Loki’s hands. More importantly, Sif is hunting Lorelei. You know, that whole Siren bit. Lorelei is strong like any Asgardian, but also plus Siren. She escaped during the events of Thor: The Dark World when the dark elves screwed everything up, and a bunch of prisoners escaped. But Sif has brought a choker, which will solve the issue. Good times.

Rooster’s wife shows up at the biker bar. She causes a commotion, except everyone else is under Lorelei’s spell. So much for Rooster’s wife. Fitz has designed some higher caliber weapons for the ActionTeam. Shall I start the betting pool now on how effective small arms will continue to prove against metahumans, let alone Asgardians? The whole Lorelei thing isn’t great. It’s not great when the ActionTeam arrives at Rooster’s bar either, despite their inconspicuous arrival in a half dozen black SUVS. The local police open fire on them. Oops. Probably should have thought that one through, Phil son of Coul. Sif makes some fast cover for the S.H.I.E.L.D. boys by moving an RV with her meaty leg, then enters the bar to battle Lorelei. Lorelei comments that she does not fear Sif, and has beaten her before. This is hard to believe when she orders her bikers to attack, because the bikers are mooks. They cannot possibly hurt Sif. It’s kind of like when the villains in the “Superman” TV series fired all their bullets at Superman, then decided to throw their guns, like this would somehow be more effective. Just ridiculous.

Obviously, while Sif dispatches the mooks, Lorelei is out the back. She ensares Ward in her evil spell, and bounces. Why did Phil bring Ward with him, over May, again? Oh, right, because this show has to run forty two and a half minutes. Nevermind. Forget I even asked.

So the Lorelei collar is busted. Coulson assigns Fitz-Simmons to fix that shit. After Skye rants for a bit, he also assigns my personal favourite L7-type to aid in hunting Agent Ward down… electronically. Apparently Ward really is like a James Bond or Jason Bourne type… with lockers full of weapons, money, credentials… all over the world. Frankly, Ward never struck me as important enough for that before. I guess my bad? I shouldn’t have underestimated him.

At the New York New York, Ward scores with Lorelei! It is not clinical. It is not wooden. One wonders if he will ever be able to go back. … Of course, this is all in exchange for him providing Lorelei with an army, presumably to conquer Earth. Oops. Afterward, Lorelei reflects on her captivity. And on how she kind of thought Earth sucked. Ward talks about slaying Sif, but Lorelei points out that it’s a stupid idea. The other ActionTeam members, on the other hand…

Fitz claims that Ward and Lorelei don’t appear on any camera anywhere in Las Vegas. This is factually incorrect, because we saw them wandering around a casino floor. I don’t care how careful Ward allegedly is… he and Lorelei wandered around on a casino floor. Somebody saw them. Of course, Fitz then immediately locks Sif inside the ActionPlane’s holding cell. Apparently he’s somehow become hypnotized by Lorelei’s spells as well. Oops. Sif starts banging on her cell wall. Simmons decides to go investigate the source of all the banging, but discovers that she and Skye are locked in as well. Soon after, Coulson encounters Fitz, immediately deduces what has happened, and talks his way past him. Meanwhile, Lorelei is on the plane, and she dismissively crushes Agent May with one blow. Ouch. Meanwhile: The ActionBrig is opened, launching Sif… INTO OPEN SKY! It happened to Thor, you see. It’s comedy jokes, achieved through repetition!

After the commercial break, there’s a weird sexy showdown. May, Ward, Lorelei… Lorelei tells us that the unbelievably awkward and chemistry-less scenes between Skye and Agent Ward aren’t over. Great. Hoorah. Woot.

Meanwhile, Coulson reconvenes with Simmons and Skye. Simmons tries to brain him with a fire extinguisher, but you know, doesn’t. Since he’s still a clear-thinking individual. For some reason he seems to think that Sif is probably not dead and stuff. And sure enough, when the plane opens again, Sif gets back in to confront a Lorelei now armed with Sif’s own blade. Well… for now. Actually, I think it’s time for the big action piece. Sif and Lorelei begin swordfighting! Fitz was going to interfere and stuff, until he spotted Simmons. Who knows what’s going on there? But also, Ward and May are going to fight. From what I’ve seen so far, the outcome of that brawl is laughable and not in doubt, but I’m sure Ward will put up a fight of some kind.

Whoops! Looks like Coulson sucker punched Fitz right away. Good times. Oh, but Ward is putting up a fight. I hate to get my dander up again, but this is kind of absurd. Heralding back to my review of “T.R.A.C.K.S.”, despite the fact that the show has characterized May as being both faster and more skillful than Ward, she’s also a girl, so when she kicks Ward in the head, he’s fine, and he starts throwing her around. Dramatic tension, I get, but I’m not wild about how we’re getting it this week. Sorry, showrunners, you are doing a shitty job. I know this because even after May tackles Ward through a glass wall, he somehow is the one that comes up with the gun. Isn’t the whole point that she’s faster, with better reflexes? You know, to counteract his better upper body strength. Good thing the gun is empty.

And good thing Sif saves the day by collaring Lorelei.

Anyway, things wrap up tidily. Ward (bleeeeeeeeeeegh) desires another woman than May. Boy, I wonder who. Please, keep forcing that, showrunners! I really enjoy the terrible scenes between Skye and Ward! We need more of them! They are delightful! Kinda feels like May and Ward are dunzo. Coulson visits Skye to talk about how the GH-325 is of alien origin. Skye kinda doesn’t give a shit, since she’s still alive and all… but I really feel like we need to see Nick Fury on this show sometime soon. These convenient excuses for why he’s not around have already worn thin. It’s a bummer. My personal concern? This stuff is heavy plot stuff… we’re in… what, mid season 1? How is this show possibly going to survive multiple season on network TV? I feel like this series always needed to be a 13 episode cable affair. But that’s just me.

Coda: Agent May was listening in. She’s reporting to another master. I am Jack’s complete lack of surprise.

This episode kind of annoyed me. It had some really good stuff going, though, so I won’t be too hard on it. The film tie-in was a welcome one. I feel like this show is going to need occasional guest appearances to keep it going. The next one practically has to be Sam Jackson giving at least a cameo turn as Director Nick Fury… but we shall see.

Trailer: Thor: The Dark World (Official)


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The second film of Marvel’s Phase 2 for it’s Cinematic Universe comes in the form of Thor: The Dark World. I’m sure the title should give as to which of the Avengers character is front and center for this Phase 2 film.

Above is the official theatrical poster for the film which has a strong fantasy, Drew Struzan feel to it. That’s more than appropriate since Thor bridges the gap between the more grounded superheroics of Midgard’s (that’s Earth to the layman) heroes (Captain America, Black Widow, Hawkeye and Iron Man) and the more fantasy and scifi denizens of Asgard like Thor and the upcoming film, Guardians of the Galaxy.

While this latest trailer released by Marvel is not the footage that was shown to Hall H attendees during Marvel’s panel at this year’s Comic-Con, it still manages to show some new footage in addition to one’s already shown at the initial teaser earlier. For one, it has more Loki (which is smart of Marvel since Loki has become this Cinematic Universe’s resident bad boy everyone seems to love or hate to love.) and it also shows some hints at the darker, grittier look that Alan Taylor looks to bring from his time as director of episodes of Game of Thrones for HBO.

Natalie Portman’s character, Jane Foster still seems to come off as not belonging to this ensemble, but there’s still chance that the finished product will flesh her out and her relationship with Thor to everyone’s satisfaction.

Thor: The Dark World is set for a November 8, 2013 release date.

Trailer: Thor: The Dark World (Official)


Thor the Dark World

Iron Man 3 is already premiering in Europe and less than two weeks from premiering in North America. To help tie-over North American filmgoers until Iron Man 3 premieres on this side of the Atlantic Marvel Studios has released the first official trailer for the second film in Phase 2 of their Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Thor: The Dark World sees the Marvel action return to Asgard as Thor must now battle the return of an enemy older than the universe itself. Kenneth Branagh is out as director and in steps Alan Taylor of Game of Thrones as the filmmaker for this sequel. Most everyone returns for this second go-around in Asgard and the Nine Worlds with some new faces such as Chris Eccleston as Malekith the leader of the Dark Elves of Svartalfheim.

Thor: The Dark World is set for a November 8, 2013 release date.

Source: Joblo Movie Network

Review: Thor (dir. by Kenneth Branagh)


Marvel Comics has had a much better success in bringing their 2nd-tier characters over onto the big-screen than DC Comics and they’ve made the risky decision to tie-in every film they make into one shared universe. Comic book fans have begun to call this the Marvel Film Universe since it contains the same characters and backgrounds as those of their comic book counterparts but also with enough changes to make them stand-out on their own. They’ve already begun this with the first two Iron Man films and a recent reboot of the Incredible Hulk. With the X-Men, Spider-Man, Daredevil and Fantastic Four film rights still under the control of other film studios it left Marvel (now Disney) to use other characters in their control to fill out the rest of this shared universe. The next one to get their turn on the bigscreen is the live-action adaptation of Marvel’s Asgardian God of Thunder. The studios picked British filmmaker Kenneth Branagh to handle this adaptation and his background in bringing Shakespeare to the big-screen has made Thor a flwed but very entertaining superhero film.

To start off, it has to be said that Thor was always going to be the most difficult of all the characters that will make up The Avengers film to bring to the bigscreen. While all these Marvel films do have their fantastic elements due to each character’s superhero nature it was even more fantastic with the character of Thor. This character is in effect a being who has been worshipped by humans in the past as one of their deities. God-like characters have always been tough to make human and relatable in stories and film. It’s a testament to Branagh’s handle of the Asgard characters such as Thor, Odin and Loki that we don’t end up with just all-powerful beings, but individuals whose impulses and motivations definitely are human. It’s this dynamic between Thor, his father Odin and his brother Loki which drives the Shakespearean angle of the film’s storyline. It’s where Branagh’s history of making Shakespeare accessible to the general film audience that makes their story easy to follow and understand.

The film actually begins with the human characters of Dr. Jane Foster (played by Natalie Portman) and her colleagues (Stellan Skarsgard and Kat Dennings)  driving around in the New Mexico desert at night looking for atmospheric disturbances which should validate Foster’s theories on the Einstein-Rosen Bridge aka wormholes. What they end up running to instead is Thor himself arriving on Earth (Midgard in Asgardian terms) to begin his banishment from his homeworld. Yes, I say homeworld as the film has turned one of the more difficult aspects of Thor’s background into something that makes sense for the audience not steeped and learned from decades of Thor comic books. Thor’s home of Asgard is just one of nine worlds around the galaxy of which Earth is one.

It’s right after this scene that we go back to what started Thor’s banishment. The film does a great job explaining the role the Asgard’s played in Earth’s past history and the consequences of their war against the Frost Giants of the world of Jotunheim (one of the nine worlds). It’s through the narration by Odin himself (Anthony Hopkins) that we learn of the origins of the Gods and myths of Norse culture. This intro scene also shows Odin showing his two young sons in Thor and Loki the relic he had taken to end the wars between Asgard and the Jotunheim. For an origin sequence it was able to set up the rules of this fantastical world of Asgard and it’s Nine Realms. It’s the sequence right after which would lead to Thor’s banishment from Asgard and the stripping of his all-powerful hammer, Mjolnir, and his powers.

For some, and I would have to agree, this sequence which takes Thor, his brother Loki, childhood friends Sif and Warriors Three to the icy world of Jotunheim made up the best action setpiece for the film. The battle which begins between Thor’s forces and those of King Lauhey (Colm Feore under some very elaborate make-up effects) of the Frost Giants. This scene shares some similar qualities with an earlier action setpiece in the first Iron Man film in that it surpasses all other setpieces which would occur later in their respective films. This is not to say that the other action scenes were boring or just simple fare. They were exhilirating and full of energy, but that very first one in the beginning just had even more energy and action that it might’ve been better saved for the climax of the film.

Once the banishment occurs we finally catch up to the film’s first scene and the film begins to go back and forth between Asgard and Earth. With the former we see the machiavellian side of Loki finally assert itself. While Loki’s character is never truly shown to be evil his mischievious streak does show to have a cruel side to it. The bombshell of a news from Odin about his true origins was a nice touch, but it doesn’t lead to the sort of evil character turn we’re used to. In fact, I would say that Loki’s character (played with Iago-like relish by Tom Hiddleston) ends up becoming like the son who does the wrong things for the right reasons. He’s a nice contrast to the more open-faced Thor who does what he says instead of dancing around the subject even to the detriment of his standing with his father.

The scenes on Earth itself is where the comedic aspect of the film comes in. Most of the comedy comes at the expense of Thor’s “fish out of water” reaction to the new world around him. It’s helped much by some great comedic timing by Jane’s assistant Darcy (Kat Dennings who steals the film from Portman whenever they’re on together). It is also the time on Earth where some of the flaws in the film really become apparent. First and foremost would be Portman’s Jane Foster character who seem to be so uneven. She goes from brilliant astrophysicist one moment then giggling schoolgirl the next whenever she’s in close proximity to Thor. While Portman and Hemsworth do make quite the radioactively beautiful couple there’s a sense of untapped chemistry between the two that might have been left on the editing floor. It’s a shame really since so much could’ve been done with the Foster character to really give reasons to why Thor ends up valuing the lives of said mortals to earn his God of Thunder status once again.

Thor really does entertain despite some character and storytelling (really most of it on the Earth side of things) flaws which could’ve sunk the film right from the start. I believe that it’s director Branagh’s handling of the Shakespearean tragedy on the Asgard side of the film that holds the film together. This is one reason and the other being a star-turning turn by Chris Hemsworth as Thor himself. His performance goes from cocky, brash young man on the cusp of leadership to lost, confused and rudderless once banished then back again to a maturing prodigal son who finally learns the lessons his father has been trying to teach him. It would interesting to see Hemsworth’s Thor truly interact with Downey’s Tony Stark and Chris Evans’ Steve Rogers when The Avengers comes out in 2012.

The riskiest part of Marvel’s attempt to create their Marvel Cinematic Universe succeeds where most seem to think it will fail. It’s not as strong an origin film as Favreau’s first Iron Man, but it does add a sense of wonder that film could never grasp through two films. Even the controversial casting choices to put non-white actors to play Asgard roles (Tadanobu Asano as Hogun and Idris Elba as Heimdall) comes off well that the audience shouldn’t even wonder why a black and Asian person were playing characters written originally as white.

From the look of things there’s no official word whether there will be a second Thor film, but I wouldn’t be surprised if there was no matter how the film does boxoffice-wise. There’s just too much great stories to tell about Thor, Asgard and the rest of the Asgard Nine Realms now that the foundation has been laid down with this first film. I do hope that Branagh returns for those sequels if they do happen. One thing which Branagh has proven was his handling of action sequences. They weren’t amazing, but they were handled with enough skill that I believe a second time around we’d get even better action from a director known more for serious dramatic films.

A final thing to mention would be the Easter Egg final scene which occurs once the end credits finish their run at the end of the film. For those who stayed to see this scene it should be a nice treat for Marvel and comic book fans. It shows a certain artifact that should tie Thor to the upcoming Captain America film later this summer. All I can say for those who didn’t stay to see it and knows their Marvel trivia are two words: Cosmic and cube.

PS: An Avenger member makes a cameo appearance halfway in the film that doesn’t look tacked on despite what some of the more “glass half-empty” film bloggers on the net would make you think…Also, it’s safe to forgo seeing Thor in 3D. It’s not a bad post-conversion but it doesn’t really add to the film. See it in 2D to save yourself a few bucks on the ticket price.

Thor (2nd Official Trailer)


First we hear news that Marvel has tabbed Shane Black to be the director for the third Iron Man film. Now, Marvel has decided to unleash the second official full trailer upon the masses.

This second trailer expands on the first trailer and the Super Bowl TV Spot. There’s some new scenes added but I especially like how they’ve given a longer look at Thor fighting the Frost Giants of Jotunheim which is what will probably lead to him being banished by All-Father himself, Odin, to Earth to learn how to be a hero or some such.

There’s also more new stuff about Loki acting as the main villain of the film. I don’t consider the Destroyer as the villain but more of a tool of Loki’s. From what I could gather from this new trailer it looks like Kat Denning’s character will be the comic relief on the human side of things while Ray Stevenson’s Volstagg does it on the Asgardian side.

The film comes out in both 2D and 3D this May 6th. Let the Summer Blockbuster Wars begin!

Thor (Super Bowl TV Spot)


The second Marvel Pictures superhero is plain and simply the awesome Asgard Thunder God himself. Thor is the Kenneth Branagh directed adaptation which will help tie-in with the rest of the Marvel Pictures produced superhero hero film of the last 3 years.

The Super Bowl tv spot shows new scenes in addition to those already shown in the official trailer released a couple months ago. This tv spot is all about Chris Hemsworth being Thor. There’s action sequences involving him battling Odin’s weapon of mass destruction in The Destroyer in what’s probably a town in New Mexico. We don’t see much of any of the other Asgardians like Loki, Sif, The Warriors Three and Heimdall.

Of all the superhero films Marvel has been working on since they decided to handle making films of their comic book properties this one has to be the wild-card of the bunch with the highest chance of failing. So far, the hype for the film has been even with many loving what they’ve seen, so far. Then there are those who seem to be hating what they’ve seen, so far. We’ll see on May 6, 2011 which side ends up being correct.

Thor – Official Teaser Trailer


First we get the first official Thor poster and now just a day later we finally have the first official trailer (just a teaser, but still a trailer) for this film which looks to be one of the most-awaited films for 2011’s summer blockbuster season.

The teaser looks to be a shorter version of the sizzle reel shown at this past summer’s San Diego Comic-Con. We get to see Thor in his Asgard and human form and boy did Hemsworth look like he worked out to fit the role. Dude looks yoked. There’s some scenes of the Destroyer doing its destroying things deal that wasn’t in the Con footage and we get a bit more Loki scenes even if they’re just a tad fleeting.

The trailer has just increased my need to see this film and it looks like Thor will explore the more epic and outrageous side of the Marvel Universe with the Asgard’s advanced tech seeming to act and look like magic to those on Midgard (Earth). Here’s to hoping Kenneth Branagh was up to task in adding some gravitas and his penchant for working well with Shakespearean themes into what is just a comic book film.