An ‘A’ for Gopher”

Posted on April 30, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, Ted Lange presents three stories of cruise ship love.

Episode 5.26 “Pal-I-Mony-O-Mine/Does Father Know Best?/An ‘A’ for Gopher”

(Dir by Ted Lange, originally aired on April 10th, 1982)

Dr. John Hanson (Ben Vereen) boards the ship with his new girlfriend, attorney Jenny Brooks (Denise Nicholas). John is shocked to discover that his former girlfriend, Ellen (Lynne Moody), is also on the cruise. Jenny befriends Ellen and, after listening to all the details of how Jenny supported John while he was going through medical school, she suggests that Ellen should sue John for palimony. Jenny even offers to help Ellen and John figure out how much John owes her. John agrees. As he and Ellen itemize their former relationship, they come to realize that they’re still in love. Sorry, Jenny! Jenny leaves the boat alone. John and Ellen leave the boat engaged. (Jenny does give them a bill for her legal services. John and Ellen have a good laugh.)

WOW! That’s not the type of story that you regularly see on The Love Boat. It’s rare for a passenger to leave as angry as Jenny did. What’s surprising is that neither Ellen nor John seemed to feel that bad about Jenny getting her heart broken. Then again, what was Jenny thinking when she invited Ellen back into their lives to begin with? This is why you’re never friendly with your significant other’s exes. I don’t care how nice they seem or act. They’re all potential enemies! I don’t care how polite they are when they approach you outside the Dallas Museum of Art and start speaking in their fakeass British accent, don’t trust them …. well, anyway, let’s move on.

Gopher is super-excited when his junior high English teacher, Susan Wilkham (Susan Strasberg), boards the ship. Gopher explains that he’s always had a crush on her and, now that Gopher is an adult, Susan appears to also now have a crush on him. (Don’t freak out, she doesn’t even realize he was a former student until he specifically mentions that he was in her class.) Except …. oh no! Captain Stubing has a crush on her as well! Well, don’t worry. Things work out for Gopher. While Vicki does not get a stepmother, Gopher gets a girlfriend who we will probably never hear about again. Fred Grandy and Susan Strasberg made for a surprisingly cute couple. (It helped that they both appeared to be the same age, despite the show’s effort to cast her as being “the older woman.”) Good for Gopher, it’s about time something good happened to him.

Finally, a father (Lloyd Bochner) encourages his nerdy son (Kevin Brophy) to hit on a beautiful but snobbish blonde (Kristina Wayborn). The son prefers the blonde’s shy best friend (Patty Freedman). On every episode of The Love Boat, there’s one story that doesn’t amount too much and that what this story was.

Hey, this episode was directed by Isaac Washington himself, Mr. Ted Lange! Obviously, The Love Boat isn’t really a show that demands or even allows an auteurist approach but I will say that this was one of the better acted episodes that I’ve seen. Vereen and Moody, Grandy and Strasberg, they all had plenty of chemistry. This was a truly pleasant cruise, despite Jenny’s anger.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 2.2 “Daystalker”

Posted on April 29, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, the Daystalker stalks wherever it is that this show takes place.

Episode 2.2 “Daystalker”

(Dir by Don Michael Paul, originally aired on August 24th, 1996)

After his girlfriend Sandy (Cindy Ambuehl) is assaulted by a serial rapist, TC becomes obsessed with tracking the so-called Daystalker down. Detective Bonnie Wilson (Gwen McGee), sent to the beach to head up the investigation, thinks that the Daystalker is going to eventually move on from rape to murder. She also thinks that TC is a loose cannon who is going to spook the Daystalker into moving to another city before he can be captured and prosecuted for his crimes. Cory is set up as a decoy and soon finds herself being followed by the Daystalker. Meanwhile, the terribly traumatized Sandy struggles with PTSD.

And, while that’s going on, Elvis and Victor try to get a Rastafarian to take a hex off of them!

This episode epitomizes one of the things that really bugs me out Pacific Blue. On the one hand, we have a very serious storyline about a serial rapist and one of his traumatized victims. A scene where Sandy has to leave a self-defense class because it’s triggers a flashback is a powerful and honest moment, certainly more powerful than anything you would expect to see on a show like Pacific Blue. On the other hand, we have this totally cartoonish subplot about a random Rastafarian putting a hex on Elvis and Victor. At a time when the entire bike patrol is supposed to be out looking for a serial rapist who has assaulted their best friend’s girlfriend, Victor and Chris are laughing because Elvis thinks the hex is making his hair fall out. Never mind the stupidity of the hex plot. Tonally, the two plots don’t go together. With this episode, Pacific Blue reveals that it still doesn’t know if it wants to be a gritty crime drama or just Baywatch on bicycles.

This could have been a very strong episodes. There were moments and lines of dialogue that really stood out for being considerably more thoughtful than one might expect from this show. But it was still an episode of Pacific Blue, which means that the camera still lingered on random women in bikinis and way too much time was spent on TC saying, “I have to do something!” Only TC could make his girlfriend’s rape about himself and only Pacific Blue would let him get away with that.

Even when they’re dealing with a serious issue as they did for half of this episode, it’s hard to escape the fact that these people are bicycle cops. The bicycles, the crisp white shirts, the shorts …. it just makes it hard to them seriously. This was yet another episode where a lot of time was spent with Palermo and TC explaining that bike cops are real cops. We’re at the start of the second season here. If you’re still having to justify your existence at this point, you’re never going to do it.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 6.14 “Revenge of the Forgotten/Charo”

Posted on April 29, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites. Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week epitomizes an era!

Episode 6.14 “Revenge of the Forgotten/Charo”

(Dir by Phillip Leacock, originally aired on February 19th, 1983)

Just the fact that one of this week’s fantasies is actually entitled “Charo” should tell you all you need to know about it. Charo plays Maria Diaz (her full name is much longer), who has come to Fantasy Island to meet her father. Charles Woodruff (Van Johnson) didn’t even know that he had a daughter but he takes the news surprisingly well.

The interesting thing about this fantasy is that Charles Woodruff is an American diplomat, who has a home in both New York City and Fantasy Island. As Fantasy Island has previously been established as being its own nation, you do have to wonder if perhaps Charles Woodruff is America’s ambassador to Fantasy Island. A large part of the fantasy involves him hosting a dinner for several other diplomats so I guess it’s possible that every country sends an ambassador to Fantasy Island. Perhaps Fantasy Island even sends a delegate to the United Nations. Maybe that would explain where Tattoo was during all of those season 5 episodes where Julie was suddenly Roarke’s sidekick. For that matter, maybe that’s where Julie is now. The show never has really explained what happened to her.

Anyway, how much you like this fantasy will depend on how much you like Charo. She is someone who definitely epitomizes an era and, of course, the same can be said of both The Love Boat and Fantasy Island. It’s interesting that, over the years, there have been multiple attempts to reboot both of those series and they’ve never really worked, largely because a good deal of the appeal of Love Boat and Fantasy Island is how much they really are a product of the 70s and 80s. Attempting to update them for the modern era tends to negate everything that make both of the shows so entertaining to watch today.

(The latest Fox update of Fantasy Island had a lot of gorgeous scenery but it got bogged down in all of its attempts to world build. It’s fun to speculate about how the Island works. It’s less fun to actually have the show explain it to us.)

As for the other fantasy, it involves Marjoe Gortner! As usual, Marjoe’s playing a villain. He’s cast as Loren Robertson, who framed Alan Daly (Steve Kanaly) for a crime that he didn’t commit and then tricked Alan’s girlfriend, Marion (Christine Belford), into marrying him. Recently released from prison, Alan comes to Fantasy Island to track down a fabled treasure that Alan believes he can use to restart his life. With the help of Tattoo (who dresses up like Indiana Jones), Alan finds the treasure but, when he sees Loren and Marion on the Island, Alan gets distracted by his desire for revenge.

This story was a bit of an odd one. Alan’s fantasy was to find the treasure and, after he found it, Roarke was like, “So, I guess you’ll be leaving now.” Instead, Alan decides to spend a full weekend on the Island to try to get revenge. I’ve never seen Roarke try to get a guest to leave early before but it’s even more strange to be reminded that somehow all of these fantasies occur over the course of one weekend. Some episodes have seemed like a bit much for just two or three days.

Despite the fact that this episode originally aired in 1983, it doesn’t get more 70s than Charo and Marjoe! Charo was her usual self. Marjoe was a great villain as always. This was an enjoyable trip to the Island.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 3.18 “Kidnap”

Posted on April 28, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, two dumbs kids case a lot of trouble.

Episode 3.18 “Kidnap”

(Dir by Gordon Hessler, originally aired on January 26th, 1980)

Ponch and Baker have been assigned to escort to stupid kids — Pete (Brad Savage) and his weirdo friend Ray (Christopher Holloway) — to the country courthouse so that they can receive some sort of an award for an essay that they wrote about traffic safety. I don’t know, it sound pretty dumb. For some reason, local news reporter Pat Blake (Jayne Kennedy) is there to cover the story. Ponch gets busy flirting with Pat and Baker’s busy hitting on Pete’s older sister (Judy Strangis) and nobody notices Pete and Ray getting into an unlocked limo and starting the engine.

Meanwhile, two crooks named Solkin (played by legendary character actor Timothy Carey) and Bickel (Warren Berlinger) escape from custody, run down to the parking garage, and hop in the limo. Because those dumb kids turned on the engine, Solkin and Bickel steal the car with the two stupid kids in the backseat!

Even though this is entirely the fault of Pete and Ray, the entire Highway Patrol mobilizes to rescue them. This episode is one long chase scene. Solkin and Bickel want to drive up to Canada. (Draft dodgers!) Pete and Ray are trying to figure out a way to escape. Ponch and Baker are trying to discreetly follow without letting the crooks know that they’ve been spotted. Unfortunately, two stoners in a van try to help and almost give away the entire operation.

Of course, the kids are rescued and, of course, it’s all because of Ponch. Ponch dresses like an auto mechanic and then borrows a banged-up Cadillac that has fuzzy pink seat covers. Ponch follows the men and continually plays La Cucaracha by honking the car’s horn. While Baker and the other members of the Highway Patrol struggle to keep track of the kidnappers and continually screw up, Ponch solves this case almost single-handedly!

Okay, that’s a little unfair on my part. This is one of those episodes where the emphasis really is on team work. Everyone — from Grossie to Getraer to Bear to Ponch and Jon — does their part to follow the limo and to come up with a plan to save the kids. Still, it’s hard not to notice that, when it comes time to save the kids, it’s pretty much Ponch doing it on his own. We’re closing in on the end of the third season and it’s pretty much undeniable that CHiPs has become The Ponch Show.

This episode was kind of annoying, despite the presence of the always entertaining Timothy Carey. The main problem was that the two kids were jerks who had no one to blame but themselves for getting into that bad situation. I hope they were grounded for the rest of their lives!

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 4.2 “Amen …. Send Money”

Posted on April 28, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, Miami Vice takes an unwelcome detour.

Episode 4.2 “Amen …. Send Money”

(Dir by James Quinn, originally aired on October 2nd, 1987)

This was pretty dumb.

Tubbs, working undercover, busts Leona Proverb (Anita Morris), who just happens to be the wife of Billy Bob Proverb (Brian Dennehy). Billy Bob is a television preacher who continually asks his followers to send him cash so he can live the lifestyle that he says God wants him to live. On paper, this sounds like a great role for Brian Dennehy but this episode’s script lets him (and, for that matter, everyone else in the cast) down. Somehow, the fact that the guy is named Billy Bob Proverb is the least heavy-handed aspect of this episode.

Faye Nell (Jo Anderson), who is one of Billy Bob’s followers, calls Tubbs to the studio and says she has information on what the Proverbs are doing. As soon as Tubbs shows up, Faye tosses herself on him, rips her dress, and starts to yell, “Rape!” Tubbs finds himself being investigated by Internal Affairs while Faye claims that God told her to call Tubbs down to the studio and she even passes a lie detector test.

“I’m being set up by a preacher!” an angered Tubbs says but it turns out that Billy Bob Proverb is not the one behind all of Tubbs’s problems. In fact, Billy Bob is actually sincere, in his own strange way. Instead, the villain turns out to be another television preacher, Mason Mather (James Tolkan). Mather has the ability to make himself go into a coma, which makes it difficult to arrest him.

Before I started watching this season, I read online that season 4 featured some of Miami Vice‘s worst episodes. Amen …. Send Money feels almost like a parody of Miami Vice. The episode itself is meant to be largely comedic and perhaps if this episode had centered on Switek and Zito instead of Crockett and Tubbs, it would have worked. Unfortunately, the show killed off Zito last season so instead, it’s Crockett and Tubbs making odd jokes and rolling their eyes in shock. The thing is, Miami Vice has — up until this episode — been a show about ruthless dealers and the futility of the War on the Drugs. The thing that set Miami Vice apart from other 80s cop shows was that it was thematically dark, the endings were frequently unhappy, and Crockett and Tubbs were always the epitome of cool, no matter what happened. This episode features cartoonish villains and a silly plot and both Crockett and Tubbs come across as being a little …. well, dorky.

(On the plus side, the show does continue its tradition of featuring future stars by giving Ben Stiller a small role as a con artist.)

Oh well. Not every episode can be a great one. Hopefully, next week will be an improvement.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi High 2.2 “Bad Blood: Part Two”

Posted on April 27, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1989 to 1991! The series can be streamed on YouTube and Tubi

This week, Dwayne gets some life-changing news.

Episode 2.2 “Bad Blood: Part Two”

(Dir by Kit Hood, originally aired on November 12th, 1990)

After his summer girlfriend informs him that she’s tested positive for HIV, Dwayne goes to the local clinic to get tested. He’s understandably nervous as the doctor draws his blood. The doctor mentions that Dwayne is in a high-risk group because he had sex without a condom. Dwayne gives about twenty different excuses for why he didn’t use a condom. The doctor looks on, disappointed. Two weeks later, Dwayne returns to the clinic and is informed that he has tested positive for HIV. The doctor informs Dwayne that he’s going to have to start living life differently. He’s going to have to take care of himself. He’s going to have to give up any plans he ever had of being a father. He’s going to have to be careful when it comes to his blood.

At school, Dwayne takes out his anger on one of the condom machines in the bathroom. Wheels witnesses this and quickly runs off to tell Joey. Joey still needs a little over $300 to get his car. He also needs some money to pay everyone who took a bet on the previous episode’s attempt to walk through the cafeteria naked. Joey decides to blackmail Dwayne to get the money. (Joey has figured out that Dwayne is the one who snitched to Raditch about the walk through the cafeteria so Joey feels that Dwayne owes him the money regardless.) When Joey confronts Dwayne in the boys bathroom, it leads to another fight. Joey cuts his head. Dwayne ends up with a bloody nose. As soon as Dwayne sees that he’s bleeding, he backs off and tries to end the fight. Joey taunts Dwayne for being scared of a little blood.

“What if I have AIDS!?” Dwayne yells back.

Joey laughs off Dwayne’s comment, which leads to Dwayne throwing a fit and shouting that he didn’t do anything wrong. Joey figures out that Dwayne actually is HIV+. Later, Dwayne gives Joey the three hundred dollars in return for Joey not telling anyone. “We’re getting a car!” Snake and Wheels celebrate but the look on Joey’s face indicates that Joey is not happy about the way he got the money. In other words, Joey has a conscience! Yay, Joey!

And so does Dwayne. One of the things that Degrassi did very well was that it took characters who conformed to certain stereotypes and then dug underneath the surface and revealed that everyone — even the school bully — had their own individual fears and dreams. This episode finds Dwayne’s bravado crumbling as he’s forced to face his future as someone who is HIV positive. Darrin Brown, who is now a director, did a great job as Dwayne as did Pat Mastroianni as Joey. Both of them really grew as actors over the course of Degrassi Junior High and Degrassi High.

While that was going, BLT finally broke up with Michelle. Michelle was not happy. Eh, who cares? This was a good episode but BLT and Michelle were a boring couple and it’s hard to get overly worked up about them splitting up. Dwayne had a real isssue to deal with. Michelle will eventually find someone else willing to deal with her nonstop drama. Such is the way of the world.

One final note: in this episode, Lucy is shooting a video for L.D. Spike appears with her baby, Emma. Emma says, “Hi, L.D.” These were the first of many words to be spoken by Emma Nelson on Degrassi. (Emma, of course, will grow up to be one of the leads on Degrassi: The Next Generation. We’ve got a while to go before we reach that point, though.)

Retro Television Review: Homicide: Life On The Street 3.9 “Nothing Personal”

Posted on April 27, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC! It can be viewed on Peacock.

This week, Felton again proves himself to be the most incompetent cop in Baltimore.

Episode 3.9 “Nothing Personal”

(Dir by Timothy Van Patten, originally aired on April 21st, 1995)

Woe be anyone whose murder is investigating by Detective Beau Felton.

Felton (played by Daniel Baldwin) shambles his way through this episode, his hair a greasy mess and his eyes bloodshot. The episode takes place over the course of several days and Felton doesn’t change his clothes once. Just looking at him, one can smell the pungent mix of sweat, cigarettes, and booze. Felton is searching for his wife and his son. In this episode, his mother-in-law tells him that his wife is planning on coming home, just for her to change her mind at the last moment. On the one hand, I do feel a bit bad for Felton, even if he was an absolutely terrible husband. On the other hand, he’s got an important job and, right now, he sucks at it. His decision to go back to Megan Russert’s place after he talks to his mother-in-law definitely does not make him in any way extra sympathetic.

Poor Kay! She has been just been assigned the Chilton murder, which was one of Crosetti’s unsolved cases and now her 100% clearance rate is threatened. The case is considered to be unsolvable. Someone strangled Erica Chilton. Her husband (Dean Winters) gives Kay and Felton a stack of letters that were sent by Erica’s secret lover. Alcoholic Felton loses the letters. The episode ends with Kay reluctantly accepting that she might never solve the case. Personally, I think Kay should consider that the victim’s husband is played by Dean Winters. With the exception of Law & Order: SVU, I have never seen Dean Winters appear on a show like this without eventually turning out to be the murderer and the fact that he had a huge stack of letters from Erica’s boyfriend would give him a motive. See, Kay? I solved your case for you!

Meanwhile, Giardello goes out to lunch with Megan Russert and one of her friends. Russert wants to set them up. Giardello is interested but Russert’s friend isn’t. Giardello, in a wonderfully performed moment (all hail Yaphet Kotto), tells Russert that he feels that light-skinned black women always reject him because he’s “too black.” Russert says that’s ridiculous, just for Giardello to reply that, as a “white woman,” she wouldn’t understand. Giardello spends the rest of the episode depressed. It’s always interesting whenever Giardello, who is usually so imposing, let’s down his guard a bit and reveals his emotions. Kotto always did a great job playing Giardello, regardless of whether Giardello was ordering Pembleton to work with Bayliss or just trying to avoid doing his laundry with Munch.

Speaking of Munch, the Waterfront Bar continues to be a headache. Lewis, Bayliss, and Munch have finally purchased their bar but it turns out that the former owner is not allowed to leave behind any of the liquor that she previously had at the bar. So, the three partners are going to have to pay for all their liquor themselves. The Waterfront Bar storyline has been dragged out a bit but it is a storyline that shows just how difficult it is to start a business in an overregulated state. So, it appeals to be my libertarian side.

There were a lot of good moments in this episode, even if I am getting a bit tired of Felton and his incompetence. One thing that I’ve really enjoyed about this season is how much Kay and Russert seem to sincerely dislike each other. This episode featured Russet calling Kay out for obsessing over her perfect clearance rate and Kay’s barely pent up irritation was entertaining to watch. Still, I do find myself wondering why Russet is always at the station, even though her shift is over. Seriously, Russert, spend some time with your child and tell Felton to get off your damn couch! There’s murders that need to be solved.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Check It Out 3.14 “Marlene For Hire”

Posted on April 26, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and Peacock!

It’s Christmas in Canada!

Episode 3.14 “Marlene For Hire”

(Dir by Alan Erlich, originally aired on December 12th, 1987)

A married couple who shops at C0bb’s — Cindy (Lynne Cormack) and Ron (Hal Eisen) — ask Marlene is she’ll be a surrogate mother for them. Once Marlene figures out that they’re not asking her to become a swinger, she agrees. But then, during a doctor’s visit, Marlene is told that she’s “not a good candidate” to be a surrogate mother. It’s a bit of an odd storyline because the biggest part of the story — the visit with the doctor — occurs totally off-screen. We only hear about it when Marlene talks to Edna about it.

Still, Marlene does confess that she is somewhat relieved because she doesn’t think she would have been able to actually give the baby up. Edna, who has been in a loveless relationship with Howard for what seems like a decade, starts to cry. Awwww! It’s a sad scene, really. It’s also the type of scene that would not have worked during the first or second seasons of the show, when all of the characters were a bit too cartoonish to really touch the viewer’s heart. The third season has been a marked improvement. Kathleen Laskey and Dinah Christie both gave good performances in their scene together, making it far more poignant than I would ever expect an episode of Check It Out! to be.

As for the other storyline, there’s a contest to see which store can build the best Holiday display. (It’s a Christmas episode.) Howard goes with a manger scene, which would probably get the store sued nowadays. Leslie wants to make a manger out of bread but Howard says that’s a foolish idea. In the end, the judge says that he loves Howard’s display but the winner is another Cobb’s that made their manger out of …. wait for it! …. bread!

As I said, it’s a bit of an odd episode but it actually worked because of the — and I can’t believe I’m saying this — strength of the ensemble. After two seasons of everyone acting as if they were all appearing in different shows, the third season has found the cast really clicking. Kathleen Laskey and Dinah Christie handled the em0tional part of the show while Jeff Pustil, Aaron Schwartz, and Don Adams handled the comedy as they bickered over the best way to build a manger.

In other words, this was a good epioode. It’s a Christmas miracle!

Retro Television Review: 3 By Cheever 1.1 “The Sorrows of Gin” (dir by John Hofsiss)

Posted on April 26, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing 3 By Cheever, which ran on PBS in 1979. The entire show can be purchased on Prime and found on YouTube.

In 1979, PBS aired 3 By Cheever, three short films that were all based on stories by the American author, John Cheever. The stories all took place in the same suburban milieu and featured characters in common. The first episode was an adaptation of one of Cheever’s earlier stories, The Sorrows of Gin.

Episode 1.1 “The Sorrows of Gin”

(Dir by Jack Hofsiss, originally aired on October 24th, 1979)

Taking place in the New England suburb of Shady Hill, The Sorrows of Gin deals with the Lawton family. The Lawtons have got a nice house, lovely neighbors, and enough loyal servants that they don’t ever have to really worry about taking care of their eight year-old daughter, Amy (Mara Hobel). Kip (Edward Herrmann) and Marcia Lawton (Sigourney Weaver) are youngish, successful, athletic (they play tennis, of course), and they’re also alcoholics. They don’t realize they’re alcoholics and they’re both far more refined than the stereotypical image of the boozy drunk but they’re alcoholics nonetheless.

They’re also hypocrites. When Amy’s babysitter, Rosemary (Eileen Heckart), comes to work with booze on her breath, Kip fires her. Amy, realizing that the alcohol is causing her parents to fight, starts to secretly pour out all of the gin, a little at a time. Kip and Marcia assume that the servants are sneaking drinks and they go on a firing rampage. Amy finally decides to run away from home, just to be found by Kip who, at the very least, seems like he’s willing to try to be a better father and husband.

Wow, what a depressing story! Cheever’s original short story, which was one of the first American stories to really explore suburban alcoholism, was written with a good deal of wit and social satire. The PBS adaptation takes a far more literal approach. It captures Cheever’s story but not his voice and, as a result, you kind of find yourself why you should care about any of these people. Even taking alcohol out of the equation, Kip and Marcia are shallow, self-absorbed, and terrible parents. Maybe Amy should run away.

On the plus side, the film does feature Edward Herrmann and Sigourney Weaver, both giving excellent performances as the Lawtons. The same year in which this aired, Weaver also starred as Ripley in Alien and it is a bit odd to see Weaver playing someone who would probably never in a thousand years see that film. That said, Weaver does a good job and is totally believable as the clueless Marcia. Meanwhile, Edward Herrmann has just the right WASP-y style to play Kip Lawton. One of the most effective things about this film is how Kip is just a goofy suburban husband until he thinks someone is drinking his gin. Then, he becomes outraged. This film ends with a hint of redemption for Kip, a suggestion that Kip has finally realized how much his drinking is upsetting his daughter. But, honestly, Kip doesn’t really seem like he has it in him to change. Hopefully, he’ll just stop firing people.

This was an uneven production. The story wasn’t quite as shocking as perhaps it was when Cheever first wrote about the Lawtons. But the performances of Herrmann and Weaver kept me watching.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 3.10 “Mightier Than The Sword”

Posted on April 25, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The entire series can be found on YouTube!

Another Friday, another cursed antique….

Episode 3.10 “Mightier Than The Sword”

(Dir by Armand Mastroianni, originally aired on January 8th, 1990)

Micki’s been possessed again!

This time, it’s the result of a writer named Alex Dent (Colm Feore, who appeared in quite a few episodes of this show, always as a different villain) using his cursed pen to write about Micki becoming a serial killer. That’s how Alex makes his money. He writes about people becoming serial killers and then, when they do exactly what he has written, Alex publishes a true crime book about them.

Johnny is a huge fan of Alex’s books. Micki says that she’s seen enough death in real life without having to read about it. Johnny doesn’t seem to take her seriously, which is odd. Sometimes, Johnny seems to forget that he and Micki spend all of their time dealing with cursed antiques and battling the Devil. I mean, has Johnny forgotten about the time that he spent in prison after he was wrongly convicted of murdering his father? Johnny seems to go from being streetwise to naive rather abruptly, all depending on what the episode’s story requires of him. It’s also a bit of an odd coincidence that Johnny would just happen to be a fan of someone who has one of the cursed antiques but, then again, this wasn’t the first time this happened on Friday the 13th and I imagine it will happen a few more times as well.

This episode had an interesting premise, though I do have to wonder how Alex found out about the curse in the first place. It doesn’t seem like the most practical of curses. Alex must write, sell, and publish his books in record time. Micki always seems to be getting possessed, which usually leads to her posing in a doorway and delivering her lines like a 40s noir heroine. (In this episode, she also takes up smoking.) Fortunately, Robey always did a good job pulling off the whole suddenly possessed thing. I imagine it must have been pretty traumatic for Micki but at least Johnny learned a lesson about reading trashy true crime paperbacks.

As for this episode, Colm Feore was a good villain, there was plenty of noirish atmosphere, and the episode didn’t take itself particularly seriously. It kept me entertained! Really, what more can you ask from a show?