I Watched Perry Mason: The Case Of The Murdered Madam (1987, Dir. by Ron Satlof)


Former madam Suzanne Domenico (Ann Jillian) attempts to blackmail four rich men who are planning on embezzling money from a bank and is found dead by her husband, Tony, shortly afterwards.  Tony (Vincent Baggetta) is arrested and charged with murdering his wife.  Tony’s older brother used to run around with Della Street (Barbara Hale) and Della is able to get Perry Mason (Raymond Burr) to defend him in court.  Paul Drake, Jr. (William Katt) is brought in to do the investigative legwork.  Once again, Paul falls for a younger woman (Daphne Ashbrook) who will probably never be mentioned again in any of the other movies.

This movie was a little sad because it was obvious that Raymond Burr was not in good health.  He spends most of the movie sitting or moving with crutches.  In the movie, they say that Perry is using crutches because of a skiing accident but looking at Raymond Burr, there’s no way to imagine him skiing.  Burr is still as sharp as ever when asking questions in the courtroom but it’s still clear that he was in pain when he did this movie.  Perry being sidelined does mean that Barbara Hale and William Katt get to do more than usual.  After spending the last few movies constantly getting outrun and smacked around, Katt finally gets to beat someone up in the movie.

The mystery isn’t bad, even though I guessed who the murderer was long before the trial started.  The entire embezzlement scheme comes down to embezzling a few cents a day so that no one will notice.  That’s the same thing they tried to do in Office Space!  Luckily, no one got murdered that time.

Overall, this was a good entry in the Parry Mason movies, especially for those of us who like watching Paul Drake, Jr.  I’m starting to wonder if all of Perry and Della’s friends are going to end up getting accused of murder at some point.  My aunt and I always used to joke about how often Jessica Fletcher’s nephew was accused of murdering someone.  It might be just as dangerous to be a friend of Perry Mason’s!

I Watched Perry Mason: The Case Of The Lost Love (1987, Dir. by Ron Satlof)


Perry Mason’s ex-girlfriend, Laura Robertson (Jean Simmons), is about to be appointed to the Senate when blackmailer Pete Dixon (Jonathan Banks) threatens to reveal that she once underwent shock treatment after having a nervous breakdown.  When Dixon is murdered, Laura’s husband (Gene Barry) is arrested.  Laura hires Perry (Raymond Burr) to serve as his attorney.

At first, this movie felt weird to me because it didn’t seem right for Perry to have an ex-girlfriend when we all know that he and Della (Barbara Hale) were in love.  When Laura is at the office waiting to see Perry, she and Della have a conversation and it’s obvious that each is jealous of the other.  When Laura asks, “What about you and Perry?,” Perry shows up before Della can answer.  We all know what the answer was though.  Della loves Perry and, probably because she was so upset over Perry dating Laura, she threw herself at Paul Drake, Sr. and that’s how we got Paul Drake, Jr.

As for Paul Drake, Jr. (William Katt), he flirts with two different women in this movie but he doesn’t get to do as much investigating as he did in the first few films.  This movie is almost all Perry Mason interrogating people.  Raymond Burr uses a cane in this movie and there’s a few scenes where it’s obvious that he was in pain but he still gives a very good performance.  The movie is very talky but it also has the best courtroom confession scene yet and Raymond Burr really sells Perry’s ambivalent feelings.  The identity of the killer actually took me by surprise!

It was weird to see Perry in love with someone oter than Della but this was still an excellent entry in the series.

So, I Watched Perry Mason: The Case Of The Shooting Star (1986, Dir. by Ron Satlof)


Actor Robert McCay (Joe Penny) decides that it would be hilarious to shoot talk show host Steve Carr (Alan Thicke) on live television.  McCay thinks that the gun is loaded with blanks but, before he goes on the show, someone slips a live round into the gun.  McCay kills Steve Carr and there are a million witnesses who see him do it.  Time to call in Perry Mason (Raymond Burr)!

The third Perry Mason movie isn’t as good as the first two.  Shooting someone on television as a joke and then leaving the studio immediately afterwards is a really stupid thing to do.  As my sister pointed out while we were watching, even if Robert McCay wasn’t guilty of premeditated murder, he was probably guilty of negligent homicide for not bothering to double check whether or not there was a live round in the gun.  McCay goes right back to shooting his movie, even while he’s on trial for murder.  As for the trial, it was ridiculous.  How many people can confess under cross examination in one trial?  “Mistrial!” my sister yelled whenever Perry pulled one of his stunts and I agreed.

Paul (William Katt) teams up with a photojournalist (Wendy Crewson) and his investigation somehow leads to him playing a priest in a cheap vampire movie.  For once, Perry didn’t give Paul a hard time about anything.  Maybe he realized Paul’s scenes were the best part of The Case of the Shooting Star.

I Watched Perry Mason: The Case of the Notorious Nun (1986, Dir. by Ron Satlof)


In the second Perry Mason movie, Perry (Raymond Burr) defends Sister Margaret (Michele Greene), who has been accused of murdering Father Thomas O’Neil (Timothy Bottoms).  The D.A. (David Ogden Stiers) says that Sister Margaret was having an affair with Father O’Neil and she killed him when he tried to break it off.  However, the movie shows us that, just like in the last movie, Father O’Neil was actually killed by a hitman (Hagan Beggs).  Perry, Della (Barbara Hale), and Paul Drake, Jr. (William Katt) have to figure out who ordered the priest’s murder.

I enjoyed the Case of the Notorious Nun, even if it wasn’t as good as the previous film.  It was still entertaining and I loved watching Perry constantly give Paul a hard time about every little thing but this time, it was really obvious who the actual killer was.  Paul, of course, had romantic feelings for Sister Margaret but nothing came from them, other than a chaste kiss on the cheek.  Sorry, Paul.  You’re charming but you’re not that charming.

Father O’Neil was far more sympathetic than the previous movie’s victim.  Father O’Neil was trying to make the world a better place and his death with was a real tragedy.  That made it all the more satisfying when Perry was able to get his cross-examination confession.  There was an alarming scene early on in the movie where Perry checked into a hospital because he was feeling faint and I get the feeling that they framed the scene to make Raymond Burr look even heavier than he was.  (This movie justified Paul Drake doing all the leg work while Perry stayed at the office.)  But even if he moves a little slower than he used to, Perry Mason is still the best lawyer out there.

I Watched Perry Mason Returns (1985, Dir. by Ron Satlof)


When his former secretary, Della Street (Barbara Hale), is arrested for murdering wealthy businessman Arthur Gordon (Patrick O’Neal), Judge Perry Mason (Raymond Burr) resigns from the bench so that he can defend her in court.

Perry Mason Returns reveals who the killer is when the murder happens.  The killer is a lowlife named Robert Lynch (James Kidnie), who is wearing a gray wig and a frumpy dress so that everyone will mistake him for Della.  It doesn’t take Perry and private detective Paul Dark, Jr. (William Katt) long to discover that Lynch is the murderer but, after someone shoots Lynch, they have to figure out who hired Lynch to kill Gordon.  Gordon had recently disinherited his entire family so Perry and Paul have a lot of suspects to consider.  30 minutes in, I thought I knew who the killer was but it turned out I was wrong.

My Aunt Kate loved her detective stories and, when I was growing up, I would always watch them with her whenever we were visiting for the holidays.  Watching Perry Mason Returns really made me feel nostalgic, even if it also made me feel dumb for not being able to guess who the killer was.  Perry gives up being a judge so that he can defend Della Street in court.  That’s true love.  William Katt, who plays Paul Drake’s son, was Barbara Hale’s real-life son so I think that proves my theory that Della loved both Perry and Paul.

Perry Mason Returns was fun to watch.  It had more action than I was expecting because Paul Drake, Jr. was always getting into tight situations.  The movie really tried to make William Katt into an action star.  The murder mystery held my attention and, of course, Perry got the murderer to confess on the stand and on the record.  Some things never change!  One thing that really amused me was that, as soon as Perry took the case, everyone naturally assumed he would win.  Della wasn’t worried for a minute, even though she was facing life in prison.  “You didn’t tell me Perry Mason was her lawyer!” Robert Lynch yelled at the person who hired him.  He knew the gig was up.  Perry Mason always wins!

Watching Perry Mason Returns, I felt like I was a kid again, watching movies with my Aunt Kate and trying to solve the mystery with her.  All of the Perry Mason made-for-TV movies are on YouTube so I’ll be reviewing more of them in the future.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 2.16 “Soft Targets”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, a crazed gunman takes over the beach.  Good thing the Bike Patrol’s there….

Episode 2.16 “Soft Targets”

(Dir by Ron Satlof, originally aired on January 12th, 1997)

Zack Torrance (Terence Knox, a.k.a. St. Elsewhere‘s Dr. White) is a former soldier who claims that he has information about the CIA smuggling drugs into the U.S. as a way to help raise money to defeat the communists in Central America.  This is a conspiracy theory that I’m very familiar with.  I don’t quite buy it because it assumes a bit too much competence on the part of the CIA.  That said, it’s a popular conspiracy theory amongst some.  All I know is that communism sucks.

Kind of like this show!

Anyway, Zack opens fire on a beach and holds everyone hostage because he wants to get his story out.  For some reason, the job of securing the beach and negotiating with Zack falls to these dorks:

The CIA shows up in the form of Franklin Quill (Sherman Howard).  Quill takes over the negotiations and, while TC and Chris glower in the background, he proceeds to shoot and kill Zack.  Zack dies and the story doesn’t get out.  TC looks upset but he doesn’t really do anything to stop Quill so you know what?  Get bent, TC.

Seriously, this episode …. ugh.  First off, hostage episodes are boring to begin with.  There’s only so many times you can watch some sweaty guy barking out orders before you get bored with the whole thing.  Pacific Blue makes things worse by bringing in the Bike Patrol.  We’re supposed to dislike Quill but actually, Quill shows up, takes charge of the situation, and brings things to a close.  The fact that TC spends the whole episode standing around with an annoyed expression on his face doesn’t make Quill any less effective.  For this entire episode, TC whines and bitches about Quill’s tactics but TC never actually develops any tactics of his own.  If anything, the Bike Patrol is kind of superfluous in this episode.

Terence Knox was believably desperate as Zach.  Holly Robinson Peete showed up as a woman who was wounded by Zach’s initial attack on the beach.  She survived and then married a lifeguard (Robert Joseph).  Palermo was not in this episode.  Instead, he left to train a Bike Patrol in another country and left TC in charge of the Santa Monica’s Bike Patrol.  Big mistake, if you ask me.

If there was any pleasure to be found in this episode, it came from just how poorly the Bike Patrol came across.  Seriously, they couldn’t catch Zach.  They couldn’t control the beach.  What exactly do we need these people for?  Bike Patrol, what is it good for?  Absolutely nothing.