Category Archives: Editorial

The Oscars: The Visual Effects SemiFinalists

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

The Visual Branch Executive Committee of the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Scienes (yes, you can say it five times fast but can you say it five times fast while eating a pop tart — I think not!) has released a list of the 15 semifinalists for the 2010 Oscar for Best Visual Effects.

And here they are:

  • Alice in Wonderland
  • The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader
  • Clash of the Titans
  • Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1
  • Hereafter
  • Inception
  • Iron Man 2
  • The Last Airbender
  • Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief
  • Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time
  • Scott Pilgrim vs the World
  • Shutter Island
  • The Sorcerer’s Apprentice
  • TRON: Legacy
  • Unstoppable

This list will be narrowed down again to 7 semifinalists and then in February, the actual nominees will be announced.

Looking over this list, there’s a few bright spots.  I don’t think anyone’s surprised that Inception made the cut but it’s still good to see it there.  I’m also happy to see that there’s at least a chance that Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World might get some love.  Same thing with Shutter Island.

As for the rest of the list — well, it’s pretty much what you would expect to see, isn’t it?  Clash of the Titans?  Really?  I have to admit that I don’t remember the film all that well but didn’t the special effects kinda look like …. well, crap?  I can only assume that the voters were overwhelmed by the raw charisma of Sam Worthington.  Prince of Persia was a little better but still, for the most part, the effects were routine, dull, and predictable.  Hereafter featured an impressive tsunami but otherwise, the visual effects were pretty much limited to making the afterlife resemble a poorly lit office of the DMV.

As usual, I guess what’s really interesting about this list isn’t what’s listed as much as what’s not.  I would happily replace both Clash of the Titans and Price of Persia with Splice and Skyline, two mediocre films that were distinguished by impressive f/x work.

For that matter, even the Social Network featured Armie Hammer acting opposite himself.

I’m also disappointed to see that Black Swan was left off the list.  In typical Darren Aronofsky fashion, they did indeed come close to going over the top.  The fact that they didn’t is exactly why they deserve to be honored.

(I found this list of semifinalists on AwardsDaily.com but I’m not including a link because the site is run by an elitist dumbfug who apparently thinks that she’s the end-all/be-all of Oscar commentators.  Yes, she’s a commentator and not just some grubby little blogger like the rest of us.  Or, as she once put it — “I know the game.  Hell, I am the game…”  When I call someone a toadsucker, that’s the type of person I’m talking about.)

Do Critics Matter?

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Do critics (specifically, professional film critics) matter?  In a word, no.

This is something I’ve been thinking about for a while now, ever since I came across an article by “professional” critic Sasha Stone in which she asked the exact same question and came to the exact opposite conclusion.  Her argument boiled down to one quote: “You see things differently when you’re 20 than when you’re 30.”

And she’s right.  I see things differently at 25 than I did when I was 13.  And I imagine that when 30 comes around, I’ll have a whole new set of opinions.  For that matter, I’m sure that as a Texan I probably see some things differently than how a native of California would see them.  As I mentioned in my previous review of Black Swan, a lot of my reaction to that film was due to my own history and experiences.  Would someone who has never had those same experiences have the same reaction?  Probably not.

So, yes, Sasha is right.  People see things differently.

And I’m even more right when I say that a 30 year-old critic matters about as much as a 20 year-old critic.

At the heart of professional film criticism is this elitist notion that somehow, Roger Ebert’s opinion is more worthy of consideration than some guy who actually had to spend money to get a ticket so he could watch the movie in theater surrounded by strangers while he eats rancid move theater nachos.

Ultimately, criticism is just an opinion and the only opinion that matters is yours.  Just because I hated Avatar doesn’t mean that Avatar is a terrible movie.  It just means that from my point of view, it sucks.  And, as much fun as I have explaining why I felt it sucked, that’s ultimately just my opinion.  Whether or not Avatar is a good film or if Black Swan is a great film , the only person that can answer that question is you. 

When it comes to film (and really, all art) I think we would do best to remember the words of Aleister Crowley: “Nothing is true.  All is permitted.”

This has been on my mind a lot recently as we went Oscar season and so many critics are now taking it upon themselves to announce which films are the best and we’re all expected to follow along with their opinions like lemmings going over a cliff.  Around this time, the old school film critics start to get paranoid about all of us bloggers who have the nerve to offer up our opinions on film as if our opinion matters.  That’s because most of these critics are a part of that generation that was raised to believe that only certain people were allowed to speak and that they only had the right as long as what they said was safe and predictable.  Independent bloggers scare them because it proves what we all know: that anyone can provide an opinion.

Perhaps that’s why they’ve been so enthusiastic about embracing The Social Network, a film that suggests that blogging was the invention of sociopaths.

But ultimately, a critic is just another person providing their opinion.  And maybe you respect that opinion enough that you’ll allow it to influence what you chose to see or not to see.  And there’s nothing wrong with that.  To me, the best thing that a critic can do — and what I hope I can do on occasion — is make the viewer aware of a film that he or she might otherwise not be aware of.  If you see a film because I recommended it, I thank you and I hope you enjoyed the film as much (or as little) as I did.  And if you didn’t, that’s cool too.  I’m just a viewer with an opinion.

But when it comes to the movie itself, critics do not matter.  The only thing that matters is the individual viewer.  Art is the eye of the beholder.

At this time of year, we’re reminded that so much of so-called “professional” film criticism is simply about building a bandwagon and hopping on.  Here’s hoping that in the future, we set that bandwagon on fire and let it burn.

10 Unacknowledged Christmas Classics

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s December and that means that it’s the Christmas season and that can only mean an abundance of Christmas movies both at movie theaters and on television.  This Christmas movie has even become a genre in a way that the Thanksgiving movie or the Bank Holiday movie never has.

I love the Christmas season because 1) it’s one of the few times that there’s half a chance of seeing snow in Texas, 2) it gives me an excuse to bond with family, and 3) I get lots of presents.  And I enjoy Christmas movies so much that I can pretty much quote every line from It’s A Wonderful Life from memory.  I’ve even been known to enjoy the holiday movie marathons that pop up on the Lifetime Movie Network (especially if they feature Jeff Fahey and his bluer than blue eyes).  However, my favorite Christmas movie remains the original Miracle on 34th Street because Natalie Wood was one of my mom’s favorite actresses and Miracle was one of her favorite films.

However, in this post, I want to highlight 10 movies that have either been overlooked in the past or else films that, while properly acknowledged as classics, are rarely mentioned as being Christmas films.

1) In Bruges (2008)  — Two Irish hitman (Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson, both wonderful) hide out in Belgium during the Christmas holiday.  I love this film for so many reason but I have to specifically mention the performance of Ralph Fiennes, who plays an English crime boss with a foul mouth, a murderous personality, and a firmly held set of ethics.

2) Brazil (1985) — One reason why I love Terry Gilliam’s dark satire is because I actually have quite a bit in common with it.  We’re both often misunderstood, we’re both pretty to look at, and we were both released in 1985.  While Brazil is now often acknowledged as one of the best and most imaginative films of the last century, it’s often forgotten that all of this film’s action takes place over the Christmas season.  If you’ve never seen Brazil, see it now.  But be aware that you’ll never look at Michael Palin quite the same way again.

3) Three Days of The Condor (1975) — This espionage thriller (which stars a young, pre-Leatherface Robert Redford) skillfully contrasts cold-blooded violence with the bright outer happiness of the Christmas season.

4) Eyes Wide Shut (2000) — Stanley Kubrick’s final film is a tribute to MK-Ultra conspiracy theories and features rich people trying to be kinky during the Christmas season.  Nicole Kidman does redheads proud with her performance here and we get to see Tom Cruise smoke pot.

5) P2 (2007) — Rachel Nichols is trapped in a parking garage on Christmas Eve by a very scary Wes Bentley.  I have to admit that I’ve always had a morbid fear of either dying, getting seriously injured, or disappearing on Christmas Eve and therefore ruining the holiday for my family.  I guess that’s why P2 resonated with me.

6) Silent Night, Bloody Night (1974) — No, this is not a killer Santa film.  This is the film where a bunch of former Warhol superstars (Ondine and Candy Darling being the most prominent) play a bunch of mental patients who massacre their doctors in a disturbing, sepia-toned sequence.  Years later, on Christmas, another former Warhol superstar — the wonderful Mary Woronov — comes to investigate.  This is actually a fairly good film from director Theodore Gershuny.

7) Christmas Evil (1980) — Now this is a killer Santa film.  Harry is a loser who works in a toy factory but he’s obsessed with Christmas because, when he was a child, he saw mommy humping Santa Claus.  (Isn’t that a song?)  So, one Christmas, Harry dresses up like Santa and goes around killing neglectful parents and others who don’t have the Christmas spirit.  This is an oddly sweet film with an ending that brought very sincere tears to my eyes.

8 ) To All A Good Night (1980) — Okay, this is another killer Santa film and it’s one of those early ’80s slashers where everyone dies because they’re total and complete idiots but two things distinguish this film from other Killer Santa slasher films: 1) it features not one but two psycho Santas and the movie was directed by David Hess, star of Last House On The Left and The House On The Edge of the Park.

9) The Silent Partner (1978) —  However, the greatest of all killer Santas is to be found in this Canadian crime thriller.  Christopher Plummer plays a psycho bank robber who — disguised as Santa — robs a bank.  Elliot Gould plays a lonely bank clerk who uses the robbery as an excuse to steal some cash for himself which leads to Plummer eventually coming after him.  Plummer makes the scariest Saint Nick ever!

10) Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005) — This is pure grindhouse brilliance, a dark comedy and a metafictional satire disguised an action movie.  Robert Downey, Jr. is a small-time criminal who accidentally becomes a film star and ends up investigating a murder with a hard-boiled PI (a surprisingly self-aware performance from Val Kilmer).  And it all takes place during the holidays.

Found on Youtube: Way to Go, Newy!

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

I recently discovered that Dallas’s own Newy Scruggs has become something of a Youtube cult figure as a result of a report he filed from San Francisco shortly before the start of the World Series.

I think Newy is the sports reporter for one of the local stations down here.  I’m not sure which station because, to be honest, I make it a point not to watch the news.  (I rely on rumor and street innuendo for my knowledge of current events…)  However, I do know about Newy because when there’s somebody living in your city with a name like Newy Scruggs, you better know about it.

Anyway, here’s Newy Scruggs visiting Arleigh’s hometown….

So, now the question is this — what lies in the future for Newy Scruggs?  Will he become a famous, legendary Youtube messiah like the Garbage Day Guy from Silent Night, Deadly Night Part 2?

Or will Newy Scruggs suffer the same tragic fate as past Youtube stars?

One thing is for sure.  I will always enjoy randomly saying “Newy Scruggs.”

The National Board Of Review: I Give Up!

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

The rather enigmatic National Board of Review announced their selections for the best films of 2010 today.  The NBR is traditionally considered to be the first precursor to how the actual Oscar race will shape up.  Typically, those honored by the NBR are, at the very least, nominated by the Academy.  Strangely, nobody seems to be sure just who exactly makes up the membership of the NBR.  As far as I can tell, it appears to be a collection of film professors and cable tv executives.  It wouldn’t surprise me to discover that the NBR is actually some sort of Illuminati conspiracy or MK-Ultra experiment designed to keep American filmgoers from thinking for themselves.

Anyway, as I look over this year’s award winners, all I can say is that I give up.  If my reaction to Avatar indicated to me that I’m totally out-of-step with mainstream opinion, then the current Pavlovian acclaim of the Social Network proves it.  I will never be a part of the mainstream and it’s not by choice.  It’s just I am apparently thoroughly incapable of understanding how the mainstream brain works. 

So, that’s what the National Board of Review taught me today.  I am destined to always be alone, railing against the dying of the light.  Thank you for the insight, assholes.

Anyway, here’s this year’s award winners:

Best Picture: The Social Network (Don’t get me wrong, the Social Network is a good movie.  It’s just not that good.) 

Best Director: David Fincher, The Social Network

Best Actor: Jesse Eisenberg, The Social Network (I am so sick of hearing that this is Jesse’s “breakthrough” role.  Jesse’s breakthrough was in Adventureland, long before the mainstream ever decided to embrace him.)

Best Actress: Lesley Manville, Another Year (Haven’t seen it yet)

Best Supporting Actor: Christian Bale, The Fighter (Another movie that I will see when it opens later this month.  Still, Bale should have been nominated for American Psycho back in the day.)

Best Supporting Actress: Jacki Weaver for Animal Kingdom (Yay!  This award gives me hope.)

Best Animated Feature: Toy Story 3 (yay!)

Best Documentary: Waiting For Superman (Yes, my favorite movie of the year —Exit Through The Gift Shop — was totally ignored.)

Best Ensemble Cast: The Town (Bleh.  So I guess that would include Jon Hamm, who gave such an amazingly bad performance in this film?)

Breakthrough Performance: Jennifer Lawrence, Winter’s Bone (Another yay but you know all the mainstream is going to offer her is a role in a Twilight rip-off and maybe a Maxim cover shoot.)

Best Adapted Screenplay: Aaron Sorkin for The Social Network (Fuck Aaron Sorkin and his elitist, sexist, technophobic script.)

Best Original Screenplay: Chris Sparling for Buried (which I didn’t see, mostly because I’m claustrophobic and the movie is called Buried.)

Ten Best Films Of The Year (in alphabetical order):

Another Year

The Fighter

Hereafter (which sucked!)

Inception (yay!)

The King’s Speech (I’m actually really looking forward to seeing this)

Shutter Island (kinda bleh but enjoyable)

The Town

Toy Story 3

True Grit (another one I can’t wait to see)

Winter’s Bone (yay!)

Yep, you read that right.  No awards for such presumed favorites as James Franco and 127 Hours, Black Swan, or The Kids Are All Right.  But you better believe they found room to honor a shallow, pandering film like Hereafter.

Finally, here are the Top Ten Independent Films of 2010, according to the toadsuckers at the National Board of Review:

Animal Kingdom (yay!)

Buried (Now I guess I have to see it)

Fish Tank (yay!)

The Ghost Writer (yay — kinda)

Greenberg (bleh)

Let Me In (another kinda yay)

Monsters (shrug)

Please Give (yay!)

Somewhere (going to see it when it opens down here, Sofia Coppola is my role model)

Youth in Revolt (shrug, it’s neither bleh nor yay)

You can read the full list of winners at The Wrap.

Anyway, in order to show just how exactly I feel when confronted with mainstream thought and opinion, here’s an old picture of me with a tampon stuck up my nose.

The Independent Spirit Awards

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

This year’s Independent Spirit Award nominations were announced yesterday.  The Spirit Awards are basically the Oscars for independent films.  By independent, of course, we means films that were not directed by David Fincher, written by Aaron Sorkin, and embraced by mainstream toadsuckers who should know better.

Anyway, you can find a complete list of the nominees at the IFC web site but that site — at least on my hard-working little laptop  — had been taking forever to load.  You can also find a nearly complete list over at AwardsDaily.com but just be careful not to actually read any of Sasha Stone’s opinions while visiting the site.  Because seriously, she’ll turn you into a Roger Ebert-obsessed Stepford Wife.

Anyway, here’s the main nominees:

BEST FEATURE

  • 127 HOURS
  • BLACK SWAN
  • GREENBERG
  • THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT
  • WINTER’S BONE

BEST DIRECTOR

  • DARREN ARONOFSKY – Black Swan
  • DANNY BOYLE – 127 Hours
  • LISA CHOLODENKO – The Kids Are All Right
  • DEBRA GRANIK – Winter’s Bone
  • JOHN CAMERON MITCHELL – Rabbit Hole

 

BEST SCREENPLAY

  • STUART BLUMBERG & LISA CHOLODENKO – The Kids Are All Right
  • DEBRA GRANIK & ANNE ROSELLINI – Winter’s Bone
  • NICOLE HOLOFCENER – Please Give
  • DAVID LINDSAY-ABAIRE – Rabbit Hole
  • TODD SOLONDZ – Life During Wartime

BEST FIRST FEATURE
(Award given to the director and producer)

  • EVERYTHING STRANGE AND NEW
  • GET LOW
  • NIGHT CATCHES US
  • THE LAST EXORCISM
  • TINY FURNITURE

BEST FIRST SCREENPLAY

  • DIANE BELL – Obselidia
  • LENA DUNHAM – Tiny Furniture
  • NIK FACKLER – Lovely, Still
  • BOB GLAUDINI – Jack Goes Boating
  • DANA ADAM SHAPIRO & EVAN M. WIENER – Monogamy

JOHN CASSAVETES AWARD
(Given to the best feature made for under $500,000;
award given to the writer, director, and producer)

  • DADDY LONGLEGS
  • LOVERS OF HATE
  • OBSELIDIA
  • THE EXPLODING GIRL

BEST FEMALE LEAD

  • ANNETTE BENING – The Kids Are All Right
  • GRETA GERWIG – Greenberg
  • NICOLE KIDMAN – Rabbit Hole
  • JENNIFER LAWRENCE – Winter’s Bone
  • NATALIE PORTMAN – Black Swan
  • MICHELLE WILLIAMS – Blue Valentine

BEST MALE LEAD

  • RONALD BRONSTEIN – Daddy Longlegs
  • AARON ECKHART – Rabbit Hole
  • JAMES FRANCO – 127 Hours
  • JOHN C. REILLY – Cyrus
  • BEN STILLER – Greenberg

BEST SUPPORTING FEMALE

  • ASHLEY BELL – The Last Exorcism
  • DALE DICKEY – Winter’s Bone
  • ALLISON JANNEY – Life During Wartime
  • DAPHNE RUBIN-VEGA – Jack Goes Boating
  • NAOMI WATTS – Mother and Child

BEST SUPPORTING MALE

  • JOHN HAWKES – Winter’s Bone
  • SAMUEL L. JACKSON – Mother and Child
  • BILL MURRAY – Get Low
  • JOHN ORTIZ – Jack Goes Boating
  • MARK RUFFALO – The Kids Are All Right

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY

  • ADAM KIMMEL – Never Let Me Go
  • MATTHEW LIBATIQUE – Black Swan
  • JODY LEE LIPES – Tiny Furniture
  • MICHAEL McDONOUGH – Winter’s Bone
  • HARRIS SAVIDES – Greenberg

BEST DOCUMENTARY
(Award given to the director)

  • EXIT THROUGH THE GIFT SHOP
  • MARWENCOL
  • SWEETGRASS
  • RESTREPO
  • THUNDER SOUL

BEST FOREIGN FILM
(Award given to the director)

  • KISSES (Ireland)
  • MADEMOISELLE CHAMBON (France)
  • OF GODS AND MEN (Morocco)
  • THE KING’S SPEECH (United Kingdom)
  • UNCLE BOONMEE WHO CAN RECALL HIS PAST LIVES (Thailand)

ROBERT ALTMAN AWARD
(Given to one film’s director, casting director, and its
ensemble cast)

  • PLEASE GIVE (DIRECTOR: Nicole Holofcener)

To be honest, the only thing that really surprises me on this list is that Greenberg was 1) remembered and 2) an independent film.  Still, Greta Gerwig was wonderful in the film and it’s good to see here getting some recognition along with Dale Dickey, John Hawkes, Ashley Bell, and the cast of one of the year’s most underrated films, Please Give.

To be honest, it’s kind of nice — in these Social Network dominated times — to see that the majority of the films nominated here deal with, feature, or were made by strong women.  (Not to mention that 127 Hours is about a man who eventually has to chop off his arm because he wasn’t properly in touch with his feminine side.)

One last note — yay! for that Last Exorcism nomination though it would have been nice to see a nomination for Patrick Fabian as well.  Still, the Spirit Awards are as close as a deserving but out-of-the-mainstream film like this one can hope to get to the Oscars.

2010 Oscars: The Search For A Host Or Two

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

So, I guess this the type of silly, gossipy stuff that I — and I alone — am a sucker for but anyway … the hosts of the next Academy Awards ceremony have been announced and the winners are Anne Hathaway and James Franco!

Huh?

Don’t get me wrong, I love them both.  James Franco was great in 127 Hours and Anne Hathaway starred in the story of my life, Rachel Getting Married.  But what exactly about either one of them screams “Oscar host?”

To be honest, Oscar Host has always seemed like a thankless job.  Jon Stewart did a pretty good job a few years ago (and it was really cool how he brought Marketa Irglova back out on stage so she could give her speech after winning the award for best original song) but otherwise, is it really a job that anyone wants? 

(And, even if Stewart was a great Oscar host, he’s been getting progressively more and more smug, annoying, and self-important ever since.)

Remember when Hugh Jackman hosted and he sang that song that just went on and on and then we all realized that we didn’t really like Hugh Jackman that much in the first place?

And I guess last year it was Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin and … yeah, that was really memorable.

Ellen DeGeneres hosted the Oscars and suddenly, she was a judge on American Idol and did that do anyone any good?

Actually, I think the ideal host would be someone like Jeff Probst, someone who would just smirk after the winner’s announced and ask the other nominees what it felt like to be losers.

Seriously, I’m worried for Franco and Hathaway.  I think that perhaps in the future, the role of Oscar host should be reserved for people who are already generally acknowledged as being annoying.  That way, at least, nobody will shed any tears when the Oscar Host Curse kicks in. 

Kara DioGuardi needs the work.

Billy Jack: A Retrospective

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

So, earlier today, I came across this big discussion/debate going on in the comments section of Arleigh’s review of the “Vatos” episode of the Walking Dead.  One comment in particular caught my attention.  It was from KO, one of my favorite frequent commenters, and it concerned the “Billy Jack” films of the 60s and 70s.

Now, I have to be honest.  Of the four Billy Jack films, I’ve only seen the third, the 3-hour Trial of Billy Jack.  It nearly put me to sleep but the character of Billy Jack continues to fascinate me.  As a Native American, karate-kicking, Viet Nam vet, peace activist, Billy Jack appears to represent everything that was good and bad about the 70s.

So, with that in mind, here’s a chronological collection of Billy Jack trailers:

1) Born Losers (1967) — This was apparently Billy’s first appearance.  On the one hand, it appears to be a pretty standard bikers flick.  But, on the other hand, I want those white boots.

2) Billy Jack (1971) — Apparently, this was — for several years — the most succesful independent film ever.  I’ve got it on DVD.  The back cover reads, “Billy Jack’s just a man who loves children and other living beings.”  Except, apparently, for old, fat, white guys.

3) The Trial of Billy Jack (1974) — Okay, so there’s some legal copyright issues that apparently makes it illegal for me or just about anyone else to post the trailer to this movie online.  Well, it’s a pretty boring movie, to be honest.  But there’s about two and a half minutes of karate action that’s kinda fun and here it is.

4) Billy Jack Goes To Washington (1978)

The final (completed and released) Billy Jack film finds Billy Jack appointed to the U.S. Senate in a remake of Mr. Smith Goes To Washington.  From rebel to establishment in just 11 years, that’s our Billy Jack.

Apparently, the actor who created and played Billy Jack — Tom Laughlin — has been attempting to get a new Billy Jack film off the ground since the late 80s.  He also ran for President in 1992, 2004, and 2008.  Apparently, he’s been dealing with some health issues over the past few years but he still occasionally updates his Billy Jack web site. 

I wish him the best and I look forward to the return of Billy Jack.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Yes, technically, it’s the day before Thanksgiving but really, Thanksgiving has always been a three-day event.  On Wednesday, you shop for stuff you need.  On Thursday, you realize that you bought too much stuff that you need.  And on Friday, you shop for stuff that you want.

So, anyway, since it technically is Thanksgiving today, let’s get things started with this little short film from the Kubrick of Gore, Eli Roth…

10 Things To Be Thankful For In 2010

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s the Thanksgiving season, that time when bloggers everywhere come up with lists of things that they are thankful for.  Here’s just 10 of the many things that I’ve been thankful for in 2010.

1) The fifth season of Dexter

I have to be honest.  I’ve been a fan of Dexter since the show’s 1st season but I wasn’t sure if the show would be able to survive after the fourth season ended with Rita (Julie Benz) dead in a bloody bathtub.  However, season 5 has been a triumph.  Yes, a little too much time has been devoted to the domestic troubles of LaGuerta and Batista (Lauren Velez and the always intriguing David Zayas) but Michael C. Hall (as Dexter) and Jennifer Carpenter (as Deb) have done some of their best work this season.  Even better, this season has featured two brilliant performances from guest stars Peter Weller and, especially, Julia Stiles (who really deserves her own spin-off).  Still, you have to wonder if any murder has ever actually been solved in Miami…

2) Noomi Rapace as Lisbeth Salander. 

In three films — The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, The Girl Who Played With Fire, and The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet’s Nest, Rapace created one of the first truly iconic film characters of the 21st century and that’s an accomplishment that will stand regardless of any attempts by the Hollywood mainstream to steal her accomplishment through any unnecessary remakes. 

3) Lost

As more time has passed, the more I’ve come to admit just how dissatisfied I was with how the creators of Lost decided to end their show.  Still, that doesn’t change the fact that, for several years, I scheduled my life around when the next episode of Lost was going to air.  I may not be thankful for a series finale that left way too many questions unanswered (why couldn’t children be born on the island?  What was the sickness?) but even the final season featured some of the show’s best moments.

4) The Walking Dead

I’m not a huge fan of Frank Darabont (sorry, but The Shawshank Redemption sucks) but I’m happy to say that he didn’t fuck up The Walking Dead.

5) Kathryn Bigelow broke the glass ceiling.

I’m still not a huge fan of The Hurt Locker but I am definitely a fan of Kathryn Bigelow.  As bad as this year’s Oscar ceremony was, it was worth watching just to see Bigelow become the first woman to ever win an Oscar for best director.  In many ways, it almost felt like a fantasy come to life — not only did Bigelow win a historic victory but she did it by beating her ex, James Cameron (who, to judge from his films, has never met a woman to whom he wouldn’t condescend).  The fact that she then gave one of the only genuine acceptance speeches of the entire ceremony was a wonderful bonus.

6) Blue Valentine was rated NC-17.

The upcoming film Blue Valentine (which I have yet to see) was reportedly given an NC-17 rating on account of scenes featuring Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams having sex.  That the film would feature characters played Gosling and Williams having sex makes sense when you consider that the movie is specifically about their marriage.  However, despite this, Blue Valentine was rated NC-17 while films like The Expendables, A Nightmare on Elm Street, the Saw films — in which thousands of people are graphically killed and tortured on-screen — are given an R rating as a matter of routine.  If Blue Valentine had been about Ryan Gosling murdering Michelle Williams (as opposed to fucking her), the film probably would have an R rating and would be considered appropriate viewing in malls across America.  I’m thankful for this rating because it serves as a reminder that it’s okay to show a woman being humiliated, tortured, or killed just as long as you don’t show her actually enjoying an orgasm.

7) Exit Through The Gift Shop

The rest of you mainstreamers can talk about how much you love the Social Network for the rest of eternity, if you want.  Exit Through The Gift Shop is still the best movie of 2010.

8 ) Lisa Marie finally figured out how to work her DVR.

Yes, yes, I know.  DVR has been around like forever and it’s all old news and I’m sure there’s something even better than DVR that everyone but me is raving about and using right now but — look, shut up, okay?  Yes, I’ve had DVR forever but I just figured out how to actually make it work a few months ago.  And I love it!  Now, if I want to sit down in the living room at 3 in the morning and watch old episodes of Project Runway, there’s no way anyone can stop me.

9) Joseph Gordon-Levitt floating through a dream hallway in Inception

Inception was a film full of excellent set pieces and memorable images but whenever I think about the movie, I will always see Joseph Gordon-Levitt floating through that hallway in a suit and looking rather adorable as he does it.

10) Cthulhu on South Park

Well, of course.

That’s just ten things I’m thankful for and I didn’t even start to talk about Scott Caan on Hawaii 5-0, James Franco in 127 Hours, or movies like Fish Tank, Winter’s Bone, and Never Let Me Go.  What are you thankful for?  Leave a comment, let the world know.  The best comment wins a renewed sense of peace and a happy new year.  (Please note that this is not a legally binding document.)