Film Review: Purple Rain (dir by Albert Magnoli)


“Prince could actually act.”

That was my main reaction to watching the 1984 film, Purple Rain, a few nights ago.  Over the years, there have been a lot of music stars who have attempted to make the transition to acting.  Some have been more successful than others.  While some have stuck to playing versions of themselves, others have attempted to become actual character actors and the end results have often been mixed.  Being a strong stage performer does not neccesarily mean that person is automatically going to be a convincing film actor and the history of the movies is full of famous singers whose personality seemed to evaporate as soon as they had to act for the cameras and try to sound convincing while reciting dialogue.  Taylor Swift has built up a strong and incredibly loyal fanbase but you wouldn’t necessarily believe that she was one of the world’s biggest stars if you only knew her from her wan and bland performances in Cats and Amsterdam.  Indeed, while watching her in Amsterdam, it’s kind of hard not to be thankful when that car drives up and brings her performance to an end.

Prince, on the other hand, could truly act.

In Purple Rain, he plays The Kid.  The Kid is an enigmatic musician living in Minneapolis, Minnesota.  He’s the front man of a band called The Revolution and he sings songs that are, at times, almost disturbingly personal.  The Kid rides a purple motorcycle and he’s one of those musicians who is driven to record almost every sound that he hears.  (At one point, The Kid listens to a recording of an unidentified woman sobbing.  Who exactly the woman was or why she was crying are questions that are never answered, though I think it’s possible it was supposed to be the Kid’s mother.)  He performs to escape from the scars of his upbringing.  His father (Clarence Williams III), a failed musician, regularly beats his mother (Olga Karlatos, who memorably lost an eye in Lucio Fulci’s Zombi 2).  No one can deny The Kid’s talent but he’s also known for being a bit of a control freak and the other members of the Revolution sometimes feel that he’s not willing to give them the credit and opportunities that they deserve and….

Okay, obviously there are some similarities between The Kid and the man playing him.  Purple Rain was Prince’s first film and his first acting role and it makes sense that he would want to play a character in a situation that he was familiar with.  But that still doesn’t change the fact that Prince gives an excellent and charismatic performance in the lead role.  Unlike so many other singers-turned-actors, he doesn’t lose his spark when he has to remember his lines.  His presence doesn’t evaporate when the camera is turned on him.  Instead, if anything, Price feels even more natural off-stage than on.  Whether the Kid is being playful or serious, driven or defeated, Prince is never less than convincing.  Yes, the audience never forgets that they’re watching Prince.  But, at the same time, the Kid comes to life as an individual character with his own life and problems and personality separate of the actor who is playing him.

As for the film’s plot, it’s a fairly simple one.  The Revolution is one of three bands that hold down the house band slot at the First Avenue nightclub.  The Kid’s rival, Morris Day (played by Morris Day), plots to replace the Revolution by putting together an all-girl group called Apollonia Six.  Apollonia Six is led by Apollonia (Apollonia Kotero), who is the Kid’s girlfriend.  As Morris explains it, the Kid is too wrapped up in himself to help out Apollonia or the Revolution’s Wendy and Lisa.

And Morris Day has a point.  As soon as Apollonia tells the Kid that she’s going to be working with Morris, the Kid responds by striking her.  It’s a shocking scene but, as the film shows, it’s all the Kid learned at the hands of his father.  It’s only after a personal tragedy that the Kid starts to realize that he does not have to be just like his father.  That said, let us hope that the Kid invested in some therapy and some anger management courses after the end credits rolled.

As a character, the Kid would be unbearable if not for the strength and charm of Prince’s performance.  Prince is amazing when he performs on stage and the film’s soundtrack still holds up but what makes the film work are the moments when Prince shows us the Kid’s vulnerable side.  Self-loathing is not an easy feeling to play and it’s an even more difficult feeling to make sympathetic but Prince does both.  The Kid knows that he’s self-destructive and immature but he’s also sincere in his desire to be better than his past. The film leaves you to wonder if he’ll succeed.

Personally, I really hope he did.

WTF, Tweetdeck!?


Today, I woke up and tried to hop onto Tweetdeck and I discovered that it is now down.  I usually have 10 open columns on my Tweetdeck and, as of right now, only two of them are loading.  I can check my DMs and I can see tweets from people I follow but I can’t check my lists, I can’t check my hashtags, and I can’t see my replies on Tweetdeck.  For that, I have to go straight to Twitter.

(Oddly, I can still tweet from Tweetdeck.)

Following yesterday’s rate-limit announcement, it’s hard not to assume that the limits that Elon Musk instituted also broke Tweetdeck.  It’s like he’s just looking for ways to make those of us who encouraged others to give him a chance feel foolish.

Don’t get me wrong.  There are some thing that Elon Musk has done that I agree with.  I agree with the idea that free speech should be Twitter’s number one priority.  I agree with the release of the Twitter Files, which did show just how much the government and other wealthy players manipulated the news.  I agree with bringing back the previously banned accounts.  In fact, I think he didn’t go far enough where that’s concerned because, as far as I know, the Trashfilm Guru’s original account is still suspended.  And I even agree with doing away with the legacy blue checkmarks because the verification system had itself become corrupted.  After Musk took over the site, I had a lot less annoying people showing up on my timeline as recommended follows and I appreciated that.  Plus, Elon Musk drives my commie friends crazy and I appreciated that even more.

But none of that matters if people cannot actually use the site!

The official story is that the rate limit was instituted to combat data scraping.  Data scraping is something that has been going on since the day Twitter was founded and it’s never been a big enough problem to require destroying people’s ability to use the site.  If the problem was suddenly so bad that emergency measures were needed, why not take Twitter offline for maintenance instead of making an announcement that everyone would be restricted but that subscribers to Twitter Blue would be restricted less?  If the problem was so bad that unverified users could only read 600 tweets a day, why then change that to a thousand tweets a day in response to people getting pissed off?  If it’s that huge of a problem, you don’t say, “Okay, sorry, here’s an extra 400 tweets.”  What you do is apologize and promise to fix things as quickly as possible.  The rate limit is obviously just a scheme to convince people to subscribe.

At this point, I think everyone just has to hope that Joe Rogan or Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. will declare rate limits to be a conspiracy because they seem to be the only people that the Silicon Valley tech bros are interested in listening to.

In the end, this is all a reminder of the outsized role that social media (and Twitter, in particular) play in our lives.  Is it too late to return to the blogging era?

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 6/25/23 — 7/1/23


As a part of my effort to get caught up with all of the potential Emmy nominees, I watched a lot of television this week.  This was a week of binging!  Here’s a few thoughts on what I watched:

1923 (Paramount Plus)

A western set in the 1920s, starring Harrison Ford and Helen Mirren?  Seriously, what took so long?  Between watching Hot Fuzz last week and binging 1923 this week, I’ve also come to newly appreciate Timothy Dalton.

Are You Being Served? (Sunday Night, PBS)

The womenswear staff had to temporarily share space with the menswear staff!  No one got along but the audience loved it.  This show is single-handedly challenging all of my assumptions about the natural superiority of British humor.

The Bear (Hulu)

I was dreading watching The Bear because everything I read about it made it sound like the type of depressing show that I usually can’t stand but, having now binged the first season, I can now say that it was far better than I was expecting.  A lot of that was due to the steady and empathetic lead performance of Jeremy Allen White.  I’m looking forward to binging the second season.

Beavis and Butt-Head (Thursday, Paramount Plus)

Smart Beavis and Smart Butt-Head attempted to abduct Tom Anderson so that they could experiment on him.  Unfortunately, their anal prober broke down but luckily, Tom was able to repair it.  However, once he found out what it was for, he announced that he didn’t want to join the Elks that badly and he walked out of the flying saucer.  Meanwhile, teen Beavis and Butt-Head tried to convince Cody to let them play his video game.  Cody’s parents loved Beavis and Butt-Head.  Apparently, this week’s episode was the second season finale.  It was an okay wrap-up.  As always, I enjoyed the Tom Anderson stuff.  Cody and his parents were kind of boring but at least we got to watch Beavis and Butt-Head beat each other up while watching a relaxation video.

Dirty Pair Flash (YouTube)

On Friday night, I watched the fifth episode of Dirty Pair Flash.  Lilly and Yuri were supposed to go on a stakeout but Lilly had a date.  Yuri was not happy.  Personally, I was on Lilly’s side.  Just because you have a job, that doesn’t mean that you don’t get to have a life!

Fantasy Island (Tubi)

You can read my thoughts on Fantasy Island here!

Forgive or Forget (YouTube)

I watched an episode on Thursday.  Robin Givens was giving people paternity tests.  Robin yelled at all of her guests for being a bunch of cheaters.  I watched another episode on Friday, in which Robin was ordering even more cheating men to “get into the doghouse.”  Robin was very loud and very shrill and so was her audience.  Say what you will about Mother Love’s style of hosting, at least the sound of her voice didn’t induce migraines.

A Friend of the Family (Peacock)

I finally watched this miniseries about how Jan Broberg was abducted not once but twice by the same friend of the family and oh my God, was it ever creepy!  It’s easy to watch the Brobergs in this show and dismiss them as just being unbelievably naïve but, as the Jan mentioned in her introduction to the show, it was a different time.  This miniseries featured excellent performances from Jake Lacey, Colin Hanks, Anna Paquin, and McKenna Grace.

Jenny Jones (YouTube)

“Stop dissing my dreams!” children said to their parents, who refused to support their show business dreams.  A flustered Jenny Jones encouraged the parents to be more accepting of their kids.  The show that I watched on Thursday was over 20 years old and none of the kids became stars.  What a bunch of losers!  Shame on them for wasting everyone’s time.

King of the Hill (Weekday Afternoons, FXX)

I watched two episodes on Friday, both of which were personal favorites of mine.  First, Hank was happy that Bobby was getting into church until Hank discovered that Pastor K was a long-haired skater.  This episode featured the classic line, “Don’t you realize you’re not making Christianity better, you’re just making rock and roll worse!”  This was followed by the episode where Hank was excited that his new neighbor was a former Cowboy until he discovered that “Big Willy” Lane wasn’t the hero that he thought he was.  These were two excellent episodes, funny and heartfelt.

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (Prime)

The final season of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel was brilliant, with the time jumps reminding us that the story isn’t ending even if the show is.  My main fear was that the show would do some sort of alternate history thing to save fan favorite Lenny Bruce but, though the temptation was undoubtedly there, the show didn’t.  If Midge watching Jeopardy with Susie in 2005 didn’t bring a tear to your eye, I don’t know what to tell you.

The Master (Tubi)

I wrote about The Master here!

Only Murders In The Building (Hulu)

I enjoyed the first season of Only Murders In The Building but, even during that season, I was aware that the show would probably end up becoming a bit too self-satisfied for its own good.  I could forsee a future of slumming stars stopping by to hang out with Steve Martin and Martin Short.

This week, I watched the second season with a bit of trepidation.  I did end up enjoying it, even if the second season didn’t quite have the thrill of discovery that made the first so likable and replacing Sting with Amy Schumer just confirmed my fear that the show is heading towards the trap of celebrity self-indulgence.  That said, Steven Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez continue to be delightful and hopefully, the show will survive season 3’s addition of Meryl Streep to the cast.  (Like many talented people, Meryl is at her worse whenever she’s slumming.)

Paul T. Goldman (Peacock)

I watched this non-fiction miniseries on Monday night.  It basically featured an apparently mentally disturbed man explaining his paranoid theories about why his marriage failed.  To be honest, it all felt a bit mean-spirited.  Paul T. Goldman didn’t seem to be in on the joke and he made some pretty serious accusations against people who weren’t there to defend themselves.  The whole thing held my interest but still felt pretty icky.

Perry Mason (HBO)

It’s a shame that HBO has cancelled Perry Mason.  I watched the second season this week and I found myself very much enjoying its stylish portrayal of 1930s Los Angeles.  The story itself didn’t do much for me but the show was such a visual treat and Matthew Rhys was so well-cast as Mason that it was still compulsively watchable.

Shrinking (AppleTV+)

This week, I finally caught up with Shrinking, which is a dramatic sitcom about therapists and their patients.  I laughed more than I was expecting to at the show’s dark humor but, to be honest, the main appeal of this show is watching Harrison Ford prove that he’s still one of our best actors.  Between this and 1923, it’s hard not to regret that Harrison Ford waited so long to start doing television.

Ted Lasso (AppleTV+)

It’s finally over!  I was never as huge a fan of Ted Lasso as some people were and the third and perhaps final season didn’t really hold my interest when I watched it this week.  (Admittedly, some of that could be because I felt a bit rushed with the Emmys coming up.)  Jason Sudeikis is a likable actor and, even if the show wasn’t my favorite, the final episode did warm my heart a bit.  I will say this: if this show was your  favorite, I understand why and I don’t think any less of you.

Wednesday (Netflix)

I enjoyed Wednesday more than I expected I would.  Netflix has a pretty uneven history when it comes to horror adaptations (remember when Case and I used to suffer through their Sabrina show?) but Wednesday was enjoyable and, of course, Jenna Ortega was perfectly cast in the lead role.

Welcome Back Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back, Kotter here!

Yellowstone (Paramount Network)

This is another show that I meant to watch earlier but I only got around to the latest season this week.  I loved the mix of political melodrama and gorgeous scenery.

Yes, Minister (Monday Morning, PBS)

Jim Hacker made the mistake of thinking for himself during a television interview and talking about the need to cut back on wasteful government expenditures.  Fortunately, Sir Humphrey was able to remind Hacker of his proper place.

Retro Television Reviews: Welcome Back, Kotter 1.9 “Mr. Kotter, Teacher” and 1.10 “The Reunion”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC  from 1975 to 1979.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Mr. Kotter fights for his job and, even worse, has to have to dinner with two old acquaintances from his high school days.

Episode 1.9 “Mr. Kotter, Teacher”

(Directed by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on November 4, 1975)

Gabe tells Julie a joke about two men who were both named Bernstein.  The punchline is, “You don’t want me, you want Bernstein the Spy on the second floor!”

At school, Gabe has got a problem!  When Woodman step into the room to observe Kotter’s teaching style, he’s stunned to discover that Kotter and the Sweathogs are sitting in a circle on the floor and that they’re talking about their future ambitions.  Freddie says he wants to own the world’s tallest building and call it the Boom Boom Building.  Barbarino says that he wants to be an actor like Marlon Brando and then he and Epstein act out a scene from The Godfather.  (Incidentally, John Travolta does a pretty good Brando.)  Gabe is amused but Woodman is not.  Woodman demands that Kotter teach from the textbook.  Kotter points out that the textbook is out-of-date and there’s nothing in it to which the Sweathogs can relate.  Woodman promptly suspends Gabe and orders him to attend a disciplinary hearing.

This episode suffers from a bit of early installment weirdness and it wouldn’t surprise me if it was originally meant to air earlier in the season.  For instance, Woodman is a lot meaner than usual.  Over the past eight episodes, Woodman has often gotten frustrated and annoyed with Kotter but there’s also been a grudging respect between the two.  That Woodman would be shocked by Kotter’s teaching methods and would try to get Kotter fired as a result doesn’t really fit in with what we’ve previously seen of Woodman.  In fact, when Woodman previously taught Gabe’s class, he revealed himself to be a good teacher who was willing to engage with the students on their level.  Previously, Woodman has been grumpy and eccentric but he’s never really been malicious.

As well, in this episode, Kotter’s suddenly gets a best friend named Charlie Piper (Arnold Soboloff).  Charlie is a science teacher who drinks alcohol from a beaker.  He attends Gabe’s disciplinary hearing as a character witness and, at one point, mentions that he’s known Gabe ever since the school year began …. four week ago.  Again, it’s hard to believe that the previous eight episodes all occurred over the span of just a month.

Fortunately, the Sweathogs sneak into the disciplinary hearing.  Eptein and Washington pretend to be window cleaners.  Horshack pretends to be a janitor.  Vinnie shows up dressed as a cleaning woman.  They all testify that Gabe is the best teacher that they’ve ever had.  The arbiter of the case, Ms. Riley (Hope Summers), is moved by their testimony and Gabe keeps his job, though he is told to start using the text book.  Gabe responds by putting the book on his head and teaching the Sweathogs about good posture.

Back at his apartment, Gabe tells Julie a joke about his grandmother and a cursed ring.

This episode wasn’t bad, it just felt out of place.  I appreciated Gabe’s defense of his students, in which he argued that they weren’t dumb but that they just needed a teacher willing to speak to them about their lives as opposed to someone just requiring them to memorize facts and figures.  But, as I said before, Woodman is a lot more effective as a half-crazed eccentric than as a flat-out villain.  Again, we’ll just describe this episode as being the result of early installment weirdness.

Episode 1.10 “The Reunion”

(Dir by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on November 18th, 1975)

Gabe asks Julie if he ever told her about the time that his Aunt Lucille took driving lessons.  “No,” Julie says, “but I think I’m going to hear about it.”  Not noticing that Julie doesn’t sound particularly enthused about hearing about any of this, Gabe explains that his Aunt Lucille had no idea how to signal when she was making a turn.  Julie gives him a pity laugh.

Despite all the jokes, Gabe is not in a good mood.  Two of his high school acquaintances, Lyle (Michael Taylor) and Mary Frances (Bridget Hanley), have invited themselves over for dinner.  Not only does Gabe resent the fact that Lyle and Mary Francis always seemed to be “perfect” in high school but Julie is also planning on cooking her tuna casserole!  In fact, Gabe seems to be more upset about the tuna casserole than about having to spend a night entertaining Lyle and Marcy Francis.

Naturally, after Gabe complains about the reunion during his social studies class, the Sweathogs put on their best suits and show up on Gabe’s fire escape while he’s entertaining Lyle and Mary Francis.  The Sweathogs even bring food because they somehow know how terrible Julie’s tuna casserole is.  Gabe confesses that he may not be as rich or as perfect as Lyle and Mary Francis but he’s happy because he’s getting to teach a great group of kids.  Lyle explains that he was always jealous of Gabe because Gabe got to have fun as a Sweathog while Lyle always had to be “perfect.”  Gabe learns that it was silly for him to be insecure and Lyle learns that there is more to life than just being fabulously wealthy.  Awwwwwww!

Later, Gabe tells Julie a joke about an Italian man singing opera while barbecuing.  The meat gets set on fire.

This episode wasn’t bad.  It was interesting to see Gabe revealing that he’s not always happy about being an underpaid teacher who is probably never going to be able to afford a big apartment and it was also kind of touching to see how much both Gabe and his students cared about each other.  Still, you do have to wonder why Julie keeps making the tuna casserole since literally no one in New York City is willing to eat it.

Next week: Vinnie gets a tutor!

WTF, Twitter!?


You know, I have really been pretty open-minded when it comes to Elon Musk’s twitter but the announcement, made about an hour ago, that there are going to “temporarily” be limits on the number of tweets that you can read during a day may be the announcement that breaks me.

I’m not going to share the tweet here because I’m not sure if someone seeing an embedded tweet on a website counts towards the new read limits but basically, Elon Musk announced that verified users are now limited to reading 6,000 tweets “a day”, unverified users (i.e., those of us who don’t want to spend money to do something that we spent 14 yeas doing for free) can read 600 tweets “a day,” and new users can only read 300.  Elon says that this is being done as a temporary measure to battle spam on the site.

(It is true that there is a lot of spam on twitter now.  Recently, a bunch of obvious bots — i.e., bios that read, “I’m just looking for love!” and such — lay siege to a live tweet that I was taking part in.  It got annoying pretty quickly.  That said, I’ve got a block button and I’ve got a mute button and that’s really pretty much all I need to battle them.)

Elon’s tweet was frustratingly vague.  How temporary is temporary?  By day, does he mean a day per sunrise to sunset or does he mean that you’ll be limited by the number of tweets that you looked at over the previous 24 hours?  If I scroll my timeline, does that count as reading every single tweet that shows up on it, regardless of whether I stopped to look at the tweet or not?  If I see a tweet embedded in a news story, does that count?  If I go back and read my own tweets, do those count?  If I re-read a tweet, does that count as two tweets?  If 600 strangers all reply to a tweet, does that mean that I’m screwed as soon as I click on my notifications?

It’s frustrating.  Hopefully, the backlash — and there is a big one — will lead to twitter backtracking.  Twitter’s habit of replying to the press with the poop emoji was cute at first but now, users have serious questions about their experience and Twitter’s refusal to be clear is no longer amusing.  This isn’t a case of some whiny reporter throwing a fit and demanding to know why Elon refuses to suspend anyone who tells them to learn to code.  This is a case of real users having legitimate questions about something that feels very arbitrary.

If this policy continues, it’ll be the death of live tweeting.  I’m going to continue to try to keep my live tweets going for as long as possible.  I don’t want to have to move everything over to Mastodon, where it seems like 90% of the users are competing to see who can virtue signal the loudest.  But, if it has to be done, it’ll be done.

For now, I will no longer be embedding tweets in my posts here at TSL.  I don’t want to accidentally send anyone over their limit.

Let’s hope this is resolved soon.

I miss the Fail Whale.

Scenes I Love: Julie Christie Meets Connie White In Nashville


In this scene from Robert Altman’s 1975 masterpiece, Nashville, Julie Christie plays herself as a famous visitor to the city for which the film is named.  She is introduced to Haven Hamilton (Henry Gibson), Haven’s lawyer, Delbert Reese (Ned Beatty), political advance man John Triplette (Michael Murphy), and country music star Connie White (Karen Black).  Julie Christie may be a star in Hollywood but Connie is the star of Nashville.

Karen Black, who was born on this date in 1939, improvised her dismissive line about Julie Christine not even being able to comb her hair.  It was a moment that reportedly shocked the rest of the cast and the crew but it was also a line that perfectly summed up both Connie as a character and Altman’s version of Nashville.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Sydney Pollack Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

88 years ago today, Sydney Pollack was born in Indiana.  Though Pollack got his start as an actor, he soon moved into directing and was one of the key television directors of the 1960s.  He eventually branched out into film, making a name for himself as a director of intelligent and sensitive comedies and dramas.  Though he only directed 21 films over the course of his career, his films received a total of 48 Oscar nominations and 11 wins.  1982’s Tootsie and 1985’s Out of Africa were both nominated for Best Picture.  Out of Africa won.

Pollack also returned to acting in the 90s, making a name for himself as a skilled character actor.  I’ll always remember him from Eyes Wide Shut, intimidating Tom Cruise while playing pool.

When he passed away in 2008, Pollack was remembered as one of the best directors of Hollywood’s second golden age.

In honor of Sydney Pollack, here are….

4 Shots From 4 Sydney Pollack Films

Jeremiah Johnson (1972, dir by Sydney Pollack, DP: Duke Callaghan)

Three Days of Condor (1975, dir by Sydney Pollack, DP: Owen Roizman)

Out of Africa (1985, dir by Sydney Pollack, DP: David Watkin)

The Firm (1993, dir by Sydney Pollack, DP: John Seale)

Live Tweet Alert: Watch Hell House LLC with #ScarySocial


 

As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, for #ScarySocial, Deanna Dawn will be hosting 2015’s Hell House LLC!

If you want to join us on Saturday night, just hop onto twitter, start the film at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag!  The film is available on Prime and Tubi.  I’ll probably be there and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well.  It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.

Retro Television Reviews: The Master 1.8 “The Good, the Bad, and the Priceless”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing The Master, which ran on NBC from January to August of 1984.  The show can be found on Tubi!

This week, The Master goes to New York City!

Episode 1.8 “The Good, the Bad, and the Priceless”

(Dir by Michael Caffey, originally aired on March 23rd, 1984)

This week’s episode of The Master asks us to consider just how needlessly complicated an hour’s worth of entertainment can be.

John Peter McAllister (Lee Van Cleef) and Max Keller (Timothy Van Patten) are in New York City!  Apparently, McAllister was flipping through a magazine when he came across an advertisement featuring a picture of his long-lost daughter, Terri.  The agency responsible for the ad is headquartered in New York.  McAllister is excited about the prospect of finally tracking down his daughter.  Max is a little sad because he knows that McAllister won’t need him after he finds Terri.  And Cat Sinclair (Tara Buckman) is just along for the ride….

Who is Cat Sinclair?  She was introduced last episode as a love interest for Max.  This episode tests Cat as a third member of the regular cast.  Unfortunately, since Cat isn’t a ninja, she doesn’t really got to do much in the episode, other than stand in the background and roll her eyes whenever Max makes one of his terrible jokes.  At one point, McAllister mentions that Max has a bit of a crush on Cat but we don’t really see much evidence of it.  If anything, both McAllister and Max seem to go out of their way to ignore her.

Anyway, it turns out that the modeling agency is surprisingly willing to give out the home phone numbers of its models.  They also have no problem telling McAllister, Max, and Cat that Terri has been booked as a model at a private fashion show being put on by Simon Garrett (George Maharis).

However, what neither McAllister nor Simon Garrett realize is that the woman who shows up at the fashion show and introduces herself as Terri McAllister is not Terri at all but is instead an FBI agent named Gina (Janine Turner), who bears a passing resemblance to Terri as long as she’s wearing a brunette wig.  Simon Garrett is not only a fashion designer but he’s also an international criminal.  Gina shows up (as Terri) at the fashion show and tries to search Garrett’s office.  When Garrett’s security goons discover her, her life is saved by McAllister and Max, who both believe her to be Terri.

(How exactly McAllister, Max, and Cat managed to crash Garrett’s exclusive and private fashion show is not discussed.)

Gina continues to pretend to be Terri so that she can convince McAllister to help her figure out what Garrett’s current scheme is.  Meanwhile, Garrett recognizes McAllister as an American ninja so he arranges for his men to kidnap Gina (who, again, everyone thinks is Terri).  He threatens to kill Gina/Terri unless McAllister uses his ninja powers to break into the Brooklyn Museum of Art and steal the Crown Jewels of England.  McAllister agrees to do so, which leads to an extended sequence of Lee Van Cleef’s stunt double avoiding the security lasers by doing elaborate back flips.  Timothy Van Patten’s stunt double then does the exact same back flips.  Who knew that stealing the Crown Jewels would be so simple?

As you can probably guess, this all leads to all the stunt doubles getting into a fight at Garrett’s office.  Garrett is arrested.  The crown jewels are recovered.  Both McAllister and Max turn out to be surprisingly understanding about Gina having lied to them.  One would think that McAllister, who is essentially being hunted a ninja assassins because he came to America to find his daughter, would be a bit more upset over having his emotions so blatantly manipulated but McAllister actually appears to be amused by the whole thing.  Again, it’s hard not to suspect that finding Terri is not really as big a thing to McAllister as Max seems to believe it to be.

This is one of those episodes where everything was dependent upon everyone else being an idiot.  These are typically my least favorite episodes of any show and that’s the case here.  It’s kind of a shame because Lee Van Cleef and Timothy Van Patten both had some good moments in this episode.  The scenes where Max talked about how much he’s going to miss McAllister after they find Terri actually did have some emotional heft but it wasn’t enough to make up for the episode’s missteps.  I will admit that I smiled a bit at a subplot about an ad guy who wanted McAllister to put on a cowboy outfit and pose for a series of deodorant ads.  McAllister took one look at the outfit and said, “I would never wear that.”  Oh yes, you would, Van Cleef!

Next week: Okasa returns!

Lisa Marie’s Early Oscar Predictions For June


It’s time for my Oscar predictions for June!

With the year almost halfway over, the Oscar race still feels pretty fluid, though I think things will come a bit more into focus next month with the release of Oppenheimer and Barbie.  Obviously, Oppenheimer feels more like an Oscar picture than Barbie but you never know what could happen.  The Academy appears to really like Greta Gerwig.  Of course, both of those film have received so much hype that the true test could be just living up to expectations.  Killers of the Flower Moon manage to pass that test at Cannes and, as a result, it’s the current Oscar front runner.

Below are my predictions for June.  Be sure to also check out my predictions for March and April and May!

Best Picture

Air

Barbie

The Color Purple

Dune: Part Two

The Holdovers

Killers of the Flower Moon

Maestro

Oppenheimer

Poor Things

The Zone of Interest

Best Director

Blitz Bazawule for The Color Purple

Jonathan Glazer for The Zone of Interest

Christopher Nolan for Oppenheimer

Alexander Payne for The Holdovers

Martin Scorsese for Killers of the Flower Moon

Best Actor

Bradley Cooper in Maestro

Leonardo DiCaprio in Killers of the Flower Moon

Colman Domingo in Rustin

Paul Giamatti in The Holdovers

Cillian Murphy in Oppenheimer

Best Actress

Emily Blunt in Pain Hustlers

Greta Lee in Past Lives

Natalie Portman in May December

Margot Robbie in Barbie

Emma Stone in Poor Things

Best Supporting Actor

Willem DaFoe in Poor Things

Matt Damon in Oppenheimer

Robert De Niro in Killers of the Flower Moon

Robert Downey Jr. in Oppenheimer

Ryan Gosling in Barbie

Best Supporting Actress

Viola Davis in Air

Lily Gladstone in Killers of the Flower Moon

Taraji P. Henson in The Color Purple

Julianne Moore in May/December

Da’Vine Joy Randolph in The Holdovers