October Positivity: The Mark (dir by James Chankin)


The 2012 film, The Mark, opens with a covert attack by a group of mercenaries on a laboratory.  The head scientist, wanting to make sure that his work is not destroyed, injects guard Chad Turner (Craig Sheffer) with a biometric chip.  As Cooper (Eric Roberts), the head of security with Avanti Corporation, explains it, Chad is now the most important person in the world.  He has been injected with the future, a chip that will replace the need for personal identification or currency.  It’s a chip that Cooper claims will bring the world together under one big government.

Hmmm …. a Pureflix film about a biometric chip that will lead to one world government?  Can we all guess where this is leading?

With the world economy collapsing and threats of war dominating the headlines, Cooper decides to personally escort Chad to the G20 economic summit in Berlin.  Seeing as how everyone wants to get their hands on the chip, Cooper decides that the best plan is to fly to Berlin on a commercial flight.  Cooper describes it as hiding in plain sight.  I would describe it as being remarkably stupid.

Needless to say, the flight is an eventful one. Cooper enjoys talking to the other passengers.  And Chad flirts with a woman who is convinced that the G20 summit is actually a conspiracy of some sort.  The co-pilot asks a flight attendant to marry him and she says, “Yes.”  Yay!  One of the passengers mentions that he’s a minister and offers to marry them right there but the co-pilot explains that they’re not really into all of that religious stuff.  Unfortunately, a mercenary named Mr. Pike (Gary Daniels) hijacks the plane and demands the chip, which is currently being absorbed into Chad’s bloodstream.

The film starts out as a Die Hard clone, with Chad sneaking around the plane and taking out the terrorists one-by-one.  Cooper rallies the other passengers to fight back.  But then there’s a bright flash of light and half of the passengers and one of the pilots vanishes.  The clearly shaken minister says:

That’s right, it’s one of those films!

Can Chad and flight attendant Dao (Sonia Couling) figure out how to open up the locked cockpit so that the remaining agnostic pilot can land the plane?  And will Chad be able to escape from the plane, despite the fact that Cooper is still intent on taking him to the summit?

Like a lot of PureFlix films, The Mark attempts to deliver its message in the guise of a genre film.  Unfortunately, it’s a bit of a bore as an action film, with a slow-moving plot and fight scenes that feel as if they’ve been lifted from countless other films.  Craig Sheffer is a bland hero and the terrorists are generic.  Not surprisingly, it’s Eric Roberts who steals the film, playing Cooper as being someone who can be a valuable ally but who is also a bit too arrogant for his own good.  If I was ever on a hijacked plane, I would definitely want Eric Roberts on my side.

Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed:

  1. Star 80 (1983)
  2. Blood Red (1989)
  3. The Ambulance (1990)
  4. The Lost Capone (1990)
  5. Love, Cheat, & Steal (1993)
  6. Love Is A Gun (1994)
  7. Sensation (1994)
  8. Dark Angel (1996)
  9. Doctor Who (1996)
  10. Most Wanted (1997)
  11. Mr. Brightside (2004)
  12. Six: The Mark Unleased (2004)
  13. Hey You (2006)
  14. In The Blink of an Eye (2009)
  15. Enemies Among Us (2010)
  16. The Expendables (2010) 
  17. Sharktopus (2010)
  18. The Dead Want Women (2012)
  19. Deadline (2012)
  20. Miss Atomic Bomb (2012)
  21. Lovelace (2013)
  22. Self-Storage (2013)
  23. This Is Our Time (2013)
  24. Inherent Vice (2014)
  25. Road to the Open (2014)
  26. Rumors of War (2014)
  27. Amityville Death House (2015)
  28. A Fatal Obsession (2015)
  29. Stalked By My Doctor (2015)
  30. Joker’s Poltergeist (2016)
  31. Prayer Never Fails (2016)
  32. Stalked By My Doctor: The Return (2016)
  33. The Wrong Roommate (2016)
  34. Dark Image (2017)
  35. Black Wake (2018)
  36. Stalked By My Doctor: Patient’s Revenge (2018)
  37. Clinton Island (2019)
  38. Monster Island (2019)
  39. Seven Deadly Sins (2019)
  40. Stalked By My Doctor: A Sleepwalker’s Nightmare (2019)
  41. The Wrong Mommy (2019)
  42. Exodus of a Prodigal Son (2020)
  43. Free Lunch Express (2020)
  44. Her Deadly Groom (2020)
  45. Top Gunner (2020)
  46. Deadly Nightshade (2021)
  47. Just What The Doctor Ordered (2021)
  48. Killer Advice (2021)
  49. The Poltergeist Diaries (2021)
  50. A Town Called Parable (2021)
  51. My Dinner With Eric (2022)

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Friday the 13th: The Series 1.4 “A Cup In Time”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th, a show which ran in syndication from 1988 to 1990.  The show can be found on YouTube!

This week, a cursed teacup wreck havoc and destroys lives!

Episode 1.4 “A Cup In Time”

(Dir by Harvey Frost, originally aired on October 19th, 1987)

Someone is killing the homeless.  Every morning, young homeless people are being found dead on the street, apparently strangled.  The police don’t really care about the victims and therefore, they aren’t really all that concerned with solving the case.  In fact, only a social worker named Birdie (Maxine Miller) really seems to care.

Of course, that’s not all that Birdie cares about.  Because she has a crush on Jack, she often drops by the Antique Shop in an attempt to visit with him.  Since Jack doesn’t know how to deal with her, Mickey and and Ryan end up talking to her instead.  Birdie tells them about the murders and she also mentions that her friend, the elderly Sarah Berrell, is missing.

When Jack hears about the homeless being murdered, he says that it might have something to do with one of the shop’s cursed antiques.  Searching through the ledger, he comes across a teacup that was sold to Sarah Berrell’s brother!

Indeed, it does turn out that Sarah is involved with the murders.  She approaches homeless people at night and offers them a warm drink in a tea cup that is illustrated with a picture of a vine.  Whenever anyone drinks from the cup, the vine comes to life and strangles them.  Their youth is then transferred over to the owner of the cup.  Sarah has committed so many murders that she now appears to be in her 20s.  Using the name Lady Di (and played by Hilary Shepard), she is now the hottest rock star in America!  Ryan loves her music and, in fact, Lady Di is planning on throwing a free benefit concert for the homeless!

What a mess!

This is actually a pretty good episode, one that is reasonably well-acted and scripted, though I do have to wonder just how long Sarah had been missing for her to have time to create an entirely new life for herself as Lady Di.  The episode’s true star was Maxine Miller, who gave a sweet and rather poignant performance as Birdie.  Eventually, she discovers what the cup is capable of doing and, in the episode’s best scene, she is tempted to do the same thing that Sarah has been doing.  And really, you can’t blame her.  I mean, who wouldn’t want to stay forever young?  As well, there’s a neat auditory moment, towards the end of the episode, when a crowd of concertgoers start to chant “We Want Di” and it sounds like they’re all saying, “We Want To Die!”  It’s an effective effect, whether it was deliberate or not.

All in all, this was a good episode of Friday the 13th.  That said, I have to wonder about Birdie.  I mean, she knows the teacup was cursed.  Is she curious about any of the other stuff in the shop?  Will her character ever appear again?  I guess I’ll have to keep watching to find out.

The Rangers Win Game One Of The World Series!


Tonight, my team, the Texas Rangers, won game one of the World Series!  We were trailing when we went into the 9th but we tied it up with two runs and then, in the 11th inning, Adolis Garcia hit a home run and took us to a 6-5 victory over the Diamondbacks!

The Diamondbacks played a good game and this World Series isn’t close to being over.  But, for now, I’m just happy and excited for my team! I’m proud of them!

GO RANGERS!

Horror on TV: The Hitchhiker 6.10 “Windows” (dir by Rene Manzor)


On tonight’s episode of The Hitchhiker, David Marshall Grant plays an artist who comes to believe that his paintings are actually visions of the future.  The Hitchhiker is not impressed but it’s rare that he is.

The episode originally aired on November 23rd, 1990.

Maniac Cop (1988, directed by William Lustig)


In New York City, murders are being committed by a hulking man dressed in a policeman’s uniform.  The NYPD brass (led by William Smith and Richard Roundtree) want to cover up the fact that the murders are being committed by an apparent maniac cop but Lt. Frank McRae (Tom Atkins) leaks the news to the press.  With the citizens taking up arms against cops, the brass is eager to frame adulterous cop Jack Forrest (Bruce Campbell) for not only murdering his wife but also committing all of the murders.  Lt. McRae believes that Jack is innocent.

Why is the brass so eager to frame Jack?  Maybe it’s because they know that the Maniac Cop is actually Matt Cordell (Robert Z’Dar), a formerly good cop who was sent to Sing Sing on  trumped up brutality charges.  Cordell was killed in prison but he has now come back to life and is seeking revenge on the police force that he feels betrayed him.

Written by Larry Cohen and directed by William Lustig, Maniac Cop is the first of three Maniac Cop films.  While the other two Maniac Cop movies largely work and hold up well, the first Maniac Cop is undoubtedly the worst of the trilogy, with most of the kills occurring offscreen and the action moving very slowly.  The film is full of genre vets and Tom Atkins gives another one of this good tough guy performances.  Bruce Campbell disappointingly plays his role straight and Robert Z’Dar, as intimidating as he is, is actually underused in this film.

As with most films written by Cohen, Maniac Cop has an interesting political subtext.  It focuses on cop brutality and corruption with Cordell becoming a symbol of most people’s mixed feelings about the police.  But the Maniac Cop trilogy wouldn’t really come to life until the second film.  The first spends a lot of time setting Cordell up as a relentless avenger but there’s not much of pay-off.

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.22 “Mickey’s Choice”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990.  The show can be found on Tubi!

In this episode, a spoiled little brat discover that …. well, no.  I should let Mr. T tell you.

Episode 1.22 “Mickey’s Choice”

(Dir by Donald Shebib, originally aired on June 6th, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “a street-smart kid finds out he’s still got a few lessons to learn!”

On the mean and cold streets of Canada, Rubberhead (John Matuszak) sends 13 year-old Mickey (Jamie Shannon) on a mission to pick the pockets of the Canadians who have gathered to watch a street magician.  When the police nab Mickey, Rubberheard snarls, “Don’t talk, you little punk!” before walking away.

Because Amy Taler is the only defense attorney in Canada, she gets assigned to Mickey’s case.  The prosecution wants to toss Mickey in juvenile hall but Amy argues that Mickey is too young for that.  Rubberhead and one of his henchmen walk into the courtroom and are properly thrown out by the judge.  Mickey gives them the thumbs up signal as they leave.  My question is how has Rubberhead not been arrested as he seems to have absolutely no idea how to subtle about carrying out his criminal activities.  Also, why is he called Rubberhed?  Is that a nickname he wanted?

Rather then send Mickey into the system, Amy arranges for Mickey to be released into the custody of T.S. Turner.  Amy is able to pull this off despite the fact that Turner is an ex-con, her hair is a mess, and Turner is late coming to court.  Luckily, the judge is a fan of boxing and he decides that Turner’s former career as a boxer is the perfect justification for giving him custody of a rebellious 13 year-old.

As Turner, Amy, and Mickey leave the courthouse, they are confronted by Rubberhead and his gang.  One of them tries to grab Amy.

“Excuse me, brother,” Turner says, “that’s no way to treat a lady.”

Taking advantage of the distraction, Mickey runs for it.  After telling  Rubberhead, “I’ll deal with you later, punk,” Turner takes off after him.

Fortunately, Turner is able to grab Mickey and drop him off with Aunt Martha (Jackie Richardson) and Renee (Rachael Crawford).  Aunt Martha puts Mickey to work peeling potatoes.  Turner then heads out to try to track down Rubberhead and his gang.

“When I was younger, I was Mickey,” Turner explains, “I broke my mother’s heart!”

However, despite saying that he’s going to go out and find Rubberhead, the next scene finds Turner having dinner with Mickey, Aunt Martha, and Renee.  Turner leads the group in saying grace and even Mickey bows his head.

That night, Rubberhead leaves a bag of burning trash on Aunt Martha’s porch.  While Turner is distracted by the fire, Rubberhead breaks into the house and grabs Mickey.  Back at Rubberhead’s headquarters, Mickey brags about how tough he is until Rubberhead demands to know what he told the police.

We then cut to Turner asking various Canadians if they’ve seen Mickey.  “Look, brother,” Turner says at one point, “I’ve asked politely and I’ve asked nicely.  Now, I’m just asking.”  Frustrated by one dead end after another, Turner goes to the gym and lifts weights for several minutes.

“That’s how he thinks,” gym owner Decker explains as Turner shouts, “MORE WEIGHT!”

Somehow, all of this weight lifting leads to Turner figuring out where Rubberhead is headquartered.  Turner heads down to Rubberhead’s warehouse, where he is promptly captured and tied to a chair by Rubberhead’s gang.  Rubberhead announces that both Turner and Mickey will be dropped down an elevator shaft.

“You gotta make a choice, Mickey,” Turner says, “Right or wrong.”

Mickey unties Turner and Turner tosses a motorcycle at Rubberhead, taking out both him and his gang.  Turner and Mickey then rush to the courthouse, where Amy has been stalling a court hearing on Mickey’s future.  Mickey reveals all that he knows about Rubberhead and his gang.  SNITCH!

This is definitely an episode that suffered from trying to tell a 60-minute story in only 30.  Seriously, the narrative jumped around so much and was so haphazardly edited that it was a struggle to keep track of what was going on.  That said, Canada is a safer place thanks to T.S. Turner and that’s the important thing.  That’s why they put their faith in him.

 

Horror Scenes That I Love: Linnea Quigley in Return of the Living Dead


Everyone likes Linnea Quigley!

The 80s scream queen who brought an uninhibited attitude and an often underrated wit to countless horror films, Linnea Quigley is a true icon of horror.  Unfortunately, it’s difficult to find any scenes of Linnea Quigley that are safe to share on this site.  Most of them have been slapped with age restrictions on YouTube, for obvious reasons.

Still, I did find this scene from 1984’s Return of the Living Dead, in which Quigley’s Trash talks about her love of cemeteries.  It’s a short scene, have no doubt.  But it shows everything that has made Linnea Quigley such a popular figure amongst horror fans.  Plus, I used to be the same way about cemeteries!

Horror Book Review: Best Friend 2 by R.L. Stine


Apparently, R.L. Stine’s readers who so upset over the brilliant (but dark) ending of Best Friend, Stine felt the need to not only give them a sequel but to hold a contest to allow his readers to chime in and have a say in what should happen in the sequel.  (To be honest, that sounds like more of a publicity stunt than anything else but hey, whatever works.)  The contest was won by a girl in Wisconsin, which should be perfect evidence that the contest was rigged because everyone knows that Wisconsin is a made up place.

Anyway, in 1997 — something like five years after the publication of Best Friend so, seriously, how long did this contest last — Stine gave the world Best Friend 2.

Best Friend ended with Honey Perkins apparently murdering Bill with Becka’s knife and then promising to testify that Becka killed Bill in self-defense in return for Becka being her best friend and Becka …. agreeing!  (Woo hoo!  Way to go, Stine!)  However, the girl from Wisconsin decided that 1) Bill wasn’t really dead (despite the fact that he certainly appeared to be dead at the end of the previous book) and 2) Becka went back on her word and reported Honey to the police.  Honey was put in a mental hospital but, as this novel begins, Honey has broken out of the hospital and enrolled at a school near Shadyside.  Honey tells everyone that she’s Becka and then she tracks down Eric, who was Becka’s boring boyfriend who was dumped for Bill in the first book.  Eric was so heart-broken that he had to transfer to a new school.  (Awwwww, poor Eric!)  Honey puts Eric out of his memory by murdering him.

At Shadyside, Becka is still trying to recover from the trauma that Honey put her through.  Becka is in therapy and she even discovers the true origins of why Honey is so obsessed with her.  That’s right, it turns out that Honey is motivated by more than just a fanatical desire for Becka to be her friend and it’s actually kind of lame.  Seriously, I hope that girl in Wisconsin never ever wrote anything else because she’s one of those writers who had to overexplain everything.

Anyway, Becka finds herself being stalked again and getting threatening phone calls and all of the usual stuff.  Eventually, the stalker is revealed and it’s another twist and …. ugh.  It’s a super lame twist.  This is why you don’t let contest winners write books.  Basically — should I reveal this?  What the Hell, this book is over twenty years old.  Consider this to be your SPOILER WARNING but basically it turns out that Honey is not the one doing the stalking this time but instead, it’s Becka’s best friend from the previous book who is upset over the fact that Becka never visited her in the hospital after Honey injured her.  But there’s nothing about the character, from what we’ve seen of her, that suggests that this sort of thing would drive her mad.  This is just a twist that comes out of nowhere.  I mean, what are the chances that Becka is going to have two people in her life stalking her because they feel that she wasn’t a good enough friend?

(That said …. why wouldn’t you visit a friend who was put in the hospital by someone who was stalking you?  Becka is kind of selfish but still, everyone in this book overreacts.  Most people would just say, “Okay, I guess I’ll go find a better friend.”)

Anyway, Best Friend was Stine at his best but this sequel is lame and I blame the imaginary state of Wisconsin.

October True Crime: The Case of the Hillside Stranglers (dir by Steve Gethers)


1989’s The Case of the Hillside Stranglers is based on the killing spree of Angelo Buono and Kenneth Bianchi, two cousins who terrorized Los Angeles in the late 70s.  Buono owned his own garage and aspired to be a tough and macho pimp.  Bianchi was an aspiring police officer who supported himself as a security guard.  Over the course of just five months, they murdered ten women.  They probably would never have been caught if not for the fact that Buono eventually tired of Bianchi and kicked him out of his house.  Bianchi moved up to Washington where he committed two murders on his own.  When he was arrested, he attempted to convince the cops that he was suffering from dissociative identity disorder and that the murders were committed by his other personalities.

The Case of the Hillside Stranglers starts with the murder spree already in progress.  Buono is played by Dennis Farina while Bianchi is played by a very young Billy Zane.  Both of them are well-cast, with Farina especially making an impression as a misogynistic bully who thinks that he is untouchable.  (In real life, Farina spent 18 years as a Chicago cop and, watching his performance in this film, it’s hard not to get the feeling that he had to deal with more than one guy like Angelo Buono over the course of his time on the force.) For all of their cockiness, the film emphasizes that neither Angelo nor Kenneth were particularly clever.  The fact that they got away with their crimes for as long as they did was largely due to a combination of luck and witnesses who did not want to get involved.  Early on in the film, one woman who is harassed and nearly abducted by Buono and Bianchi refuses to call the police afterwards because she doesn’t want to relive what happened.

That said, the majority of the film actually focuses on Bob Grogan (Richard Crenna), the tough veteran detective who heads up the Hillside Strangler taskforce and who becomes so obsessed with tacking down the elusive killers that he soon finds himself neglecting both his family and his own health.  Whenever we see Grogan trying to enjoy any quality time with his children, we know that his beeper is going to go off and he’s going to have to search for a telephone so that he can call into headquarters.  (Remember, this film was set in the 70s.)  His children are a bit miffed about it, which I can understand though I really do have to say that his son, in this film, really does come across as being a brat.  (“Just ignore it, Dad,” he says, as if there aren’t two serial killers murdering innocent people in the city.)  The recently divorced Grogan pursues a tentative romance with a woman (played by Karen Austin) who, at one point, decides to investigate Angelo on her own.  Crenna, not surprisingly, is sympathetic as Grogan.  The film works best as an examination of what it does to one’s soul to spend all day investigating the worst crimes that can be committed.  Grogan gets justice but, the film suggests, he does so at the sacrifice of his own peace of mind.

It’s a well-made and well-acted film, one that will probably appeal more to fans of the police procedural genre as opposed to those looking for a grisly serial killer film.  In real life, Bianchi is serving a life sentence and Angelo Buono died in prison.  And the real Bob Grogan?  He appeared in this movie, slapping the handcuffs on Billy Zane.

4 Shots From 4 Horror Films: Special Michele Soavi Edition


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films is all about letting the visuals do the talking.

This October, I am going to be using our 4 Shots From 4 Films feature to pay tribute to some of my favorite horror directors, in alphabetical order!  That’s right, we’re going from Argento to Zombie in one month!

Today’s director: the brilliant Michele Soavi!

4 Shots From 4 Michele Soavi Films

Stage Fright (1987, dir by Michele Soavi, DP: Renato Tafuri)

The Church (1989, dir by Michele Soavi, DP: Renato Tafuri)

The Sect (1991, dir by Michele Soavi, DP: Franco Fraticelli)

Dellamorte Dellamore (1994, dir by Michele Soavi, DP: Mauro Marchetti)