“Oh, The Villainy!” TTSL Style, Take Two : “Two Face” #1

Posted on September 25, 2013 by Ryan C. (fourcolorapocalypse)

Not sure what to really say about Two Face #1, or as it’s known to the more officious Batman And Robin #23.1 (even though, say it with me, “Robin’s dead again these days”), apart from the fact that it probably has the neatest of the 3-D holographic covers that have adorned any of DC’s “Villains Month” books. And since that’s the only selling point this comic seems to have going for it, maybe I should just leave it at that and call it a day, right?

Nah. The folks behind this travesty don’t deserve to get off that easy.

And by “folks,” I should say that I mean specifically writer Peter J. Tomasi. The art by Guillem March on this one is actually pretty good — even really good for the first few pages, before settling into a “competent enough to get the job done” kind of groove. The story, though, is a complete and utter waste of time.

Figuring everybody already knows the origin of former Gotham City D.A. turned criminal boss/mastermind Two Face, Tomasi opts to skip the detailed backstory and just waste time for twenty pages. We see Two Face flip his infamous scarred coin a lot, threaten fellow baddie Scarecrow, settle a few old scores from his days on the right side of the law, and reminisce about some past events, and that’s it. At the end he flicks his coin once again to see whether or not he’ll raise hell now that Batman’s supposedly out of the picture (“dead,” it would seem, along with the rest of the Justice League, in the limp and predictable-to-a-fault Forever Evil mega-crossover mini-series) or chill out and watch his fellow crazies do the job for him. We don’t get to see the result of the toss, and it doesn’t really matter because, well — the rest of the book didn’t, either. Tomasi has taken a page from Seinfeld, it would seem, and given us a comic where more or less nothing actually happens.

I dunno, I’ve felt generally ripped off, snookered, and otherwise suckered by more or less every one of these “Villains Month” issues, but this one might take the cake in terms of being the most overtly pointless of the entire rancid bunch. Which is kind of shame when you stop and think about it because Two Face, as a character, is (or at least was, prior to this whole “New 52” thing) at least a somewhat interesting and compelling figure, and he probably still could be. But he’s not here. Shit, Tomasi doesn’t even put in enough effort to make him actively dull in this book, he’s just sorta — there.

But your four bucks won’t be if you’re foolish enough (as I was) to buy this rag.

“Oh, The Villainy!” TTSL Style, Take One : “Joker” #1

Posted on September 24, 2013 by Ryan C. (fourcolorapocalypse)

Okay, first things first — for those of you (assuming there are any) who have been wondering wondering just where the hell I’ve been hiding the last couple of months, rest assured, I’ve been writing as much as ever — maybe even moreso. Just not about movies. And just not here. Which may come as a relief, I’ll bet, to some. But for those among you who just have to have an explanation —

I’m currently in the midst of two comics-related series over at http://www.geekyuniverse.com, which I’ve been — ahem! — “re-presenting” over on my own “main” site — http://trashfilmguru.wordpress.com — as well. One, entitled “Just Pay Ditko!” is an exploration of the questionable (at best) ethics of the current comic reprint craze that’s seeing the works of some of the industry’s greatest talents packaged in high-quality, expensive hardcovers — with no compensation being directed toward the artists and writers whose work is contained in these hefty tomes. As you might gather from the title, I’m paying special attention to this unfolding dilemma as it relates to Spider-Man and Doctor Strange’s real creator, visionary artist Steve Ditko, but the scope of the articles has expanded somewhat to include other creators, as well as other creator’s-rights-related issues. I can’t imagine the average Through The Shattered Lens reader would find all this terribly interesting, but for those of you who want a glimpse into comics’ sorry ethical and legal practices, you may want to hop on over to GU and take a look — right now I’m up to part 12 in the series and will probably be looking to wrap it up somewhere around part 15 or 16 in the next few weeks.

The other ongoing “concern” I’m immersed in, however, might be of at least slightly more concern to you good folks here, though, and that is my continuing evisceration of DC’s uniformly sorry and uninspired/uninspiring “Villains Month” books. For those (blissfully, I might add) not in the know about this, throughout the month of September the House That Superman (or, more accurately, Siegel and Shuster) Built is turning all their regular monthly titles over to the bad guys, and throwing flashy 3-D holographic covers on each of the issues (at an extra buck a pop) , to boot. Quite clearly this is nothing but a cheap publicity stunt to gin up sales in the short term, but then so is everything that DC and Marvel does these days. As you’d expect, this being the current “New 52” take on these characters, the results are pretty dire. But given that I’ve droned on about these books for a few weeks already over at GU and that’s I’m an equal-opportunity kind of guy who wishes to spread the miser— err, wealth — around a bit, I thought I’d save my last few entries in this series for the readers here at TTSL and give you all a little taste of what you’ve been missing if you’ve wisely chosen to ignore these comics.

And so, without any further ado, let’s take a look at Joker #1 — or, as it’s officially numbered, Batman #23.1 — shall we?

In short, despite having better art, courtesy of Andy Clarke, than most of those other “Villains Month” quick-cash-grabs, this book still pretty well sucks, and that’s entirely down to the lame script by Andy Kubert, who’s turning out to be nowhere near the writer-artist his legendary father, Joe, was.

Kubert starts off with some possible flashbacks to the Joker’s origins — never a good idea for anyone to tackle unless their name is Alan Moore — then segues into, I guess, the present day, wherein the Clown Prince Of Crime decides to expand his inner circle by liberating a gorilla from the Gotham City Zoo, naming the hapless creature Jackanapes, and raising it as his own, well, child, I guess.

Oh, sure, it’ll all end in tears, but the limp nods Kubert makes toward Grant Morrison-era Doom Patrol-style surrealism are so ham-fisted and ill-considered that it makes for a downright excruciating read even if Clarke’s pencils and inks are generally pretty pleasing to the eye. For a “special” issue, the whole thing has the feel of a good, old-fashioned “inventory” story that’s been sitting on the shelf, unpublished (for good reason) for a couple of years. It’s all over as quickly as it is predictably, which is probably its’ one saving grace (at least only five minutes of your life will be wasted on it), but at the end of the day all you really are for your $3.99 investment is, well, a little bit more broke. You already knew the Joker was crazy, you already knew that he has a habit of making irrational decisions, and you already knew he was capable of acting utterly without conscience. Giving him a pet ape doesn’t change any of that, nor does it do much to “shed new light” on his character, motivations, you name it.

I think it’s safe to assume that you get the picture here, but just in case you don’t, I’ll make it real easy — avoid at all costs.

Review: Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. 1.1 “Pilot” (dir by Joss Whedon)

Posted on September 24, 2013 by Lisa Marie Bowman

It would not be an exaggeration to say that Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD has been the most eagerly anticipated new series of the 2013 television season.

Ever since the show was first announced, fans of both Joss Whedon and the Marvel cinematic universe have been waiting to see whether the show would live up to its impressive pedigree. Every casting announcement has been analyzed and every clip on Youtube has been viewed and debated.

Questions were asked: how would Phil Coulson (played by the wonderful Clark Gregg) manage to be the main character in this series when his death was a major plot point in The Avengers? Who was the man who was seen jumping out of a burning building and landing without a scratch on his body? Would Marvel’s Agents Of SHIELD be a prequel or a sequel to The Avengers? Would the TV show even acknowledge the films from which it spawned? Would Samuel L. Jackson show up to utter a few badass quips on network television?

But the most important question of all was this: Would Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD live up to all the hype or would it be another case of a show being smothered by the weight of high expectations?

Having just watched the first episode of Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD, I can now answer some of those questions.

How is Phil Coulson still alive? Well, it turns out that he never died in the first place. As he explains to newly recruited S.H.I.E.L.D. agent Grant Ward (Brett Dalton), he nearly died when he was attacked by Loki but ultimately, he survived. Nick Fury told the Avengers that Coulson had died because he understood that Coulson’s “death” would cause the heroes to bond together.

After the end of The Avengers (or, as the show puts it, “the Battle of New York,”), Coulson spent a while recuperating on a beach and “reading Travis McGee novels.” Now Coulson’s back and he’s in charge of the highly secretive Level 7. (The Avengers, we’re told, are only Level 6.) Level 7 investigates “special and strange” cases involving super powered individuals.

Who was the man that we saw jumping out of the burning building? A lot of people online assumed that he was Luke Cage but instead, he turned out to be Mike Peterson (J. August Richards). Mike is the show’s first “case,” a decent man who has recently lost his job and is struggling to deal with suddenly being super powered. In a neat twist, the more powerful Mike becomes, the more easy it is for him to rationalize being destructive.

Coulson and Level 7 track Mike down with the help of Skye (Chloe Bennet), a forcefully recruited hacker and anti-government activist. At the end of the episode, once Mike has been subdued through a combination of Coulson’s humanity and a tranquilizer dart fired by Grant, Skye is recruited into Level 7.

How direct a sequel is this show to the Marvel films? It’s such a direct sequel that it would probably be unintelligible to anyone who hasn’t seen the films. Not only is Mike’s origins story indirectly related to Capt. America’s (both of them owe their powers to a form of the super soldier formula) but the entire series takes place in a world that has been massively changed by the events of The Avengers. Agents of SHIELD takes place in a world that now knows that there are super powered beings walking among us.

The show is also full of little comments and throw-away references to the characters and events of the films. Those references are a nice gift to those who have seen all of the films that have seen all of the films that led up to Agents of SHIELD. At the same time, I have to admit that pretty much all of my knowledge of the Marvel universe comes from watching the films in the Avengers and X-Men franchises. My boyfriend, however, grew up reading Marvel comics. He assures me that, for every film reference that I picked up on, there were dozens of other references that would only be significant to those who have read the comic books. If nothing else, this shows that Whedon and the show’s other writers respect their audience. As a result, Agents of SHIELD invites its viewers to join the exclusive club of people who understand the importance of tweeting, “COULSON LIVES!”

No, Samuel L. Jackson does not show up but Cobie Smulders reprises her role from The Avengers, interviewing Grant and introducing him to Agent Coulson. However, guest star power isn’t necessary because Clark Gregg is such a compelling and likable actor that he perfectly anchors the show. Gregg brings a much-needed everyman quality to the role of Agent Coulson and, as such, he serves as the perfect guide through the world of super powered flamboyance.

Finally, did the pilot of Agents of SHIELD live up to all the anticipation?

In a word — yes.

Now, I should admit that I am a long-time fan of Joss Whedon’s and a good deal of my positive response to Agents of SHIELD has to do with the fact that it’s clearly a Whedon show. Not only is the show populated by characters that’ll be familiar to any Whedonite but the self-aware and relentlessly quippy dialogue suggests that, on some level, they are all aware that they are characters on a television show along with being agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Along with Clark Gregg, the cast superstar so far is Chloe Bennet, who has a way with a one-liner and, on the basis of the pilot, an appealing chemistry with Brett Dalton. Personally, I’m hoping that we’ll learn more about the appealingly eccentric Agents Fitz and Simmons (played by Ian De Caestecker and Elizabeth Henstridge). I’m also hoping that J. August Richards will return in a future episode. He generated a lot of empathy for the character of Mike and, as the result, prevented Agents of SHIELD from turning into an elaborate inside joke that would appeal only to us Whedonites.

Pilots are strange things. Not only does a pilot have to introduce all the characters and justify the show’s existence, it also has to find the time to tell a fairly compelling story that will hopefully inspire people to tune in the following week. Agents of SHIELD succeeded in doing all of that and I look forward to seeing in which direction the show ultimately heads.

Hottie of the Day: Hayley Atwell

Posted on September 24, 2013 by Arleigh

HAYLEY ATWELL

With the release of Iron Man 3 to video we get a new look at one of Marvel Studios’ popular character in Agent Peggy Carter. She’s played by the very lovely Hayley Atwell.

Ms. Atwell is an English actress who burst into the scene taking on the role of Agent Peggy Carter for 2011’s Captain America: The First Avenger. She totally owned the role and fans, both old and new, have been wanting more of her ever since. While it was her role in Captain America that finally got the rest of the world to notice her she was already a known commodity in both English and American television.

Her work ranged from shows and tv films such as The Duchess, Pillars of the Earth, Mansfield Park and The Prisoner. Yet, it always be her role as Agent Carter that fans will remember her most for now.

Her popularity doesn’t just stem from the fact that she’s drop-dead gorgeous in the old-school, 40’s glam sort of way, but also for the fact that she exudes a sense of confidence and toughness in the roles she plays without having to sacrifice her femininity and sensuality. She looks like she belongs both in the here and now and still just at home as a leading lady in a 40’s noir film.

Here’s to hoping that plans for Marvel Studios to give Ms. Atwell her own tv series based on her Peggy Cater role comes to fruition as that means we’ll be seeing more of her.

PAST HOTTIES

Review: Marvel One-Shot “Agent Carter”

Posted on September 24, 2013 by Arleigh

Ever since Thor was released on video (DVD/Blu-Ray) the people over at Marvel Studios have added as a special bonus to the video’s extras a small short film they’ve dubbed “Marvel On-Shot”. So far, they’ve either been about the adventures of fan-favorite SHIELD agent Phil Coulson or a brief look at a post-Avengers New York. The short films were cute, but nothing to really write home about.

With the release of Iron Man 3 on DVD and Blu-Ray we get a new Marvel One-Shot and it looks like the creative minds at Marvel Studios have decided to work a tad harder on making this new short film much better. It’s a flashback moment to one Agent Peggy Carter who is still grieving a year after Captain America (aka Steve Rogers) supposedly died trying to save New York from a HYDRA bomber full of tesseract-fueled bombs.

We see how she’s been relegated to doing paper work and kept from doing the field work she’s more adept at. This one-shot film actually shows in it’s short running time how even someone as skilled and heroic as Peggy Carter must still navigate and deal with a male-chauvinistic society that dismisses whatever accomplishments she’s earned in the past and seen more as a sort of “affirmative action” hire.

The film doesn’t try to force-feed this theme, but instead tries (and does so successfully) to blow-up the damsel-in-distress stereotype by showing Agent Carter at her best. And what she does best is doing the sort of field work that earned her not just the respect of the soldiers she worked with during WWII in Europe, but those of Captain America himself.

“Agent Carter” stars the original Peggy Carter in the form of British actress Hayley Atwell and she does a fine job of helping continue her character’s growth. She continues to show that she’s just as useful and skilled as Captain America which she showed in the film of the same name. In this one-shot we’re reminded of it and it also does an interesting thing in making it plausible to create a spin-off around her character.

Marvel has intimated that it’s something they’d be interested in doing and if the quality of this one-shot is anything to go by then a series (tv or web-based) starring Ms. Atwell as Agent Carter would be well-received by fans everywhere. This short film also showed that Marvel Studios has a new secret weapon to keep DC at bay. This was the first one-shot that truly belonged as a prologue to a feature-length Marvel film on the big-screen. Here’s to hoping that attaching future one-shots to full-length features not on video but in the theaters becomes an idea that Marvel Studios allow to happen.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #90: Hostages Episode 1 “Pilot”

Posted on September 24, 2013 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, after I got back from dance class, I watched the first episode of the new CBS series, Hostages.

Why Was I Watching It?

I spent the last three months watching and reviewing Big Brother for the Big Brother Blog. During every episode of Big Brother, CBS would show at least one commercial for Hostages. It was obvious that CBS was obsessed with the idea of making Hostages into the show that the entire nation would be watching and debating, a bit like a network TV version of Homeland or Breaking Bad.

The commercials, for the most part, all featured Dylan McDermott looking grim while Toni Collette frowned and, occasionally, some old white guy would tell Collette that she was the only doctor he trusted to operate on her and she would reply, “Thank you, Mr. President.” In short, the commercials made the show look terrible. The only question was whether or not Hostages would be intentionally bad or unintentionally awful.

Last night, I got my answer.

What Was It About?

President Paul Kinkaid (James Naughton) needs to have surgery and, of course, only one doctor can perform the operation. That doctor is Ellen Saunders (Toni Collette). Ellen is so concerned with the President’s health that she doesn’t realize that her husband (Tate Donovan) is having an affair, her son is selling weed, and her daughter is pregnant.

Meanwhile, Duncan Carlisle (Dylan McDermott) is a FBI hostage negotiator. When we first see him, he’s gunning down a bank robber and smirking while he does it. It turns out that Duncan needs money to take care of his sick wife.

Eventually, Duncan and a team of other black-clad operatives end up inside the Saunders home where they take the entire family hostage. They tell Ellen that, if she wants to save her family, she must assassinate the President…

What Worked?

The show turned out to be just as bad as I was expecting it to be! Whenever I saw the commercials for Hostages, I would think to myself: “That looks like it’s going to be a really boring, tedious series.” Judging from the pilot, I was right. It always feels good to be right.

That said, I do have to say that, alone among the cast, Dylan McDermott seems to understand that he’s playing a ludicrous character in a silly show and — much as he did in American Horror Story — he responds by giving an appropriately melodramatic performance. While the rest of the cast appeared to be convinced that they were appearing in the next Homeland, McDermott seemed to be enjoying a joke that only he and the viewing audience could understand.

What Did Not Work?

If there’s even been a show that would obviously benefit from an over-the-top, melodramatic approach, it would be Hostages. So, why did the pilot appear to be taking itself so damn seriously? As I watched last night’s episode, I found myself wondering if anyone involved in the show (other than Dylan McDermott) understood just how silly this all was. Instead, the show moved at an almost somber pace and all of the actors (again, with the notable exception of McDermott) delivered their lines with the type of gravity that one would usually associate with Jeff Daniels delivering one of Aaron Sorkin’s pompous polemical speeches on The Newsroom. Considering all of the melodramatic potential of this show’s plot, Hostages really has no excuse to be as boring and predictable as it was last night.

Toni Collette is one of my favorite actresses so it was kind of sad to see her give such a boring performance in the lead role of Ellen Saunders. Then again, as written, Ellen Saunders is a pretty boring character. It’s as if the show’s producers and writers were so proud of creating a professional woman that they didn’t notice that they neglected to give her a personality.

Finally, the President is just some boring old white guy. What’s up with that?

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

I was tempted to say that, like the family in Hostages, I would totally freak out if a bunch of people appeared in the house, pointed their guns at me, and announced that they were holding me hostage. However, it then occurred to me that nobody in Hostages really freaked out about being held hostage. They were certainly annoyed and occasionally, they even attempted to be defiant. But they never really freaked out.

Nor could I really see much of myself in the character of Ellen Saunders or her daughter. Since neither one of them came across as being anything more than a two-dimensional plot device, neither one of them was capable of inspiring any “just like me” moments.

I tried to relate to Sandrine Holt, who plays Maria, the only female hostage taker. However, Maria spent most of the episode carrying around a gun and, while I’m totally into the 2nd amendment, I’m not really into guns.

Then I remembered that, early on in the episode, Ellen’s daughter talks to her best friend. The friend takes one look at her and says, “Your eyes are puffy,” which is the exact same thing that I would say if one of my friends had puffy eyes.

So, that was my “Oh my God! Just like me!” moment.

Lessons Learned

Sometimes, commercials don’t lie.

Nitro+ Mascot Super Sonico Gets Own Anime Series

Posted on September 23, 2013 by Arleigh

Super Sonico.

Two words that literally will elicit either two reactions from fans of all things Japanese pop culture. One reaction would be a groan and a shaking of the head that a mascot for a Japanese software company will get her own anime series. For these individuals it’s bad enough that she’s flooded the collectibles’ market with everything Super Sonico from vinyl figures (even one that’s 1/2 scale), posters, keychains, bedspreads, pillow cases and uncounted more things made to separate an otaku from their cash.

The other reaction would be on the other side of the spectrum. A reaction of unrestrained glee. Super Sonico has almost become not just the mascot for Nitro+ but for the current trend in Japanese pop culture that goes by the label of moe. So, Super Sonico finally having her very own anime series was just the logical progression for a character that’s already on everything else sold in Japan and overseas.

From the press release from Nitro+…

“The staff of the Japanese software maker Nitroplusconfirmed on Saturday that a television anime adaptation of its Super Sonico mascot has been green-lit. Nitroplus already opened a website for SoniAni -Super Sonico the Animation-, which was first announced at the Nitro Super Sonic 2013 event earlier in the day.

Super Sonico is the mascot girl of the “Nitro Super Sonic” events held by Nitroplus. In her back story, she is already a photoshoot model, game character, and a musician, even as she studies as a college student. She is also part of a three-piece girl band named “Daiichi Uchū Sokudo” (Fastest Speed in Space) as the vocalist and guitarist.

The character already inspired her own line of games, and figures including a giant 1/2-scale statue. Super Sonico is also appearing in Namco Bandai Games‘ Super Heroine Chronicle for the PlayStation 3 and PS Vita systems and even in a promotion for THQ’s Saints Row: The Third game.”

The question that should be going through the minds of fans until it’s announced would be which anime studio will do the animation and when the series will have a premiere date.

Source: Anime News Network

Artist Profile: Leo and Diane Dillon

Posted on September 23, 2013 by Dazzling Erin

The husband-and-wife team Leo (1933 — 2013) and Diane (1933– ) Dillon met while training at Parsons School of Design and married shortly after graduating in 1956. Over the course of 50 years, they collaborated on over 100 magazine and book covers. Among numerous awards, the Dillons won the Caldecott Medal in both 1976 and 1977, the only time that the award has been won consecutively.

6 Trailers That Are Better Than Last Night’s Episode Of Dexter

Posted on September 23, 2013 by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s time for another edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Film Trailers. Now, usually, I would have the trailer kitties go out and track down six trailers to feature here. However, the trailer kitties were so upset by how Dexter ended that, for this edition only, I had to recruit a replacement.

Let’s see what he found for us!

1) The Lumberjack (2013)

2) Rawhead Rex (1988)

3) Grizzly (1976)

4) My Mom’s a Werewolf (1988)

5) The Kiss (1988)

6) The Guardian (1990)

What do you think, Trailer Lumberjack?

Well, that certainly explains all the trees…

Guilty Pleasure No. 13: Lambada (dir by Joel Silberg)

Posted on September 22, 2013 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last year, I was doing a search for dance scenes on YouTube and I came across a handful of scenes from a film called Lambada. The scenes all had an undeniably cheap look to them and featured a rather stiff dancer who was wearing one dangling earring. The scenes were so memorably bad that I promised myself that, if I ever got the chance, I would watch this Lambada.

Well, I got that chance last night when Lambada turned up on NUVOtv. I forced my BFF Evelyn to watch the movie with me because I thought I might want to use the movie for one of my What Evelyn and Lisa Watched Last Night reviews. However, as we watched Lambada, I realized that the only way to review this movie was to consider it as a guilty pleasure.

First released way back in 1990, Lambada tells the story of Mr. Laird (J. Eddie Peck), an idealistic math teacher in Beverly Hills by day and a sexy dancer at night. Did I mention that when Mr. Laird dances, he calls himself Blade? Because he so does!

However, Blade isn’t just dancing for fun or to deal with what appears to be a split personality. Instead, he uses dance skills to impress the poor kids at the clubs so that he can then lure them into a backroom where he helps them prepare to take the GED.

He’s a dancer with a conscience and who doesn’t love that, right?

However, eventually Mr. Laird is spotted dancing by Sandy (Melora Hardin, a decade and a half before playing Jan on The Office), one of his students from Beverly Hills. When he doesn’t respond to her crush, she reveals his secret and — for reasons that are never quite clear — this puts his job in jeopardy.

Why did Lambada turn out to be such a guilty pleasure?

Just consider the following:

1) Cast in the key role of “Blade” Laird, J. Eddie Peck looks good but gives a performance that almost epitomizes the concept of anti-charisma. When he’s teaching in Beverly Hills, he wears sexy glasses. When he’s dancing in the barrio, he loses the glasses and instead wears one dangling earring. When a female student in Beverly Hills hits on him, he awkwardly smiles. When he dances, he moves so stiffly that he resembles a mannequin on a treadmill. That’s about the extent of Peck’s performance.

2) Melora Hardin, on the other hand, is completely natural and likable in the role of Sandy but, even though this film was made 16 years before the premiere of the Office, Hardin has already picked up a lot of the techniques that she would use to make Jan Levinson-Gould such a memorable character. Every time that Sandy smiles nervously or looks annoyed by another character, it’s impossible not to be reminded of Jan struggling to manage Michael Scott. As Nathan Rabin pointed out in his review of this film over at the A.V. Club, Lambada really does feel like Jan Levinson: The Early Years.

3) If Lambada was made today, it would be called Twerking and, while watching, it was hard not to imagine Melora Hardin chasing J. Eddie Peck with a big foam finger.

4) An aggressively forgettable song called Set The Night On Fire is played about a hundred times over the course of the film. The song is so generic and forced, and everyone in the film has to pretend to be so in love with it, that it becomes oddly fascinating.

5) The club that Blade dances at has an upside down police car hanging from the ceiling. The club, itself, gives off a definite human trafficking vibe but that police car is pretty neat.

6) One of Mr. Laird’s Beverly Hills students is named Egghead. Naturally, he’s the smartest student and he’s obsessed with computers. Evelyn and I both found ourselves wondering if Egghead was just a nickname or if his parents actually named him that in order to force him to grow up to be intelligent. (Even Mr. Laird calls him Egghead, which — if that’s not the student’s name — seems a bit unprofessional for a teacher.) It may not sound like much but it provided us with hours of amusement.

7) There’s a scene where Egghead uses his computer to inspire an entire classroom to spontaneously start dancing. What makes this scene especially memorable is that the computer dances along with them.

8) Whenever Blade is teaching his GED class, the students respond to almost everything he says by cheering. If nothing else, I’m sure many teachers have fantasized about being as irrationally loved by their students as Blade.

9) Eventually, Blade’s GED students compete with the Beverly Hills students. No, it’s not a dance-off. It’s a math-off! That’s right — they’re competing to see who can correctly answer the most math questions. And, believe it or not, the future of Blade’s career depends on whether or not his GED students can win. Apparently, this is how the California educational system worked back in 1990.

10) Finally, the ultimate reason that Lambada is a guilty pleasure is because — regardless of how silly and ludicrous the film may seem to us today — it was actually produced and released into theaters. That means that, somewhere out there, there are people who actually paid money to see this movie. They may not admit it but they’re out there.

They’re out there.