Tracy Dali – Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, everyone’s going undercover!

Episode 5.2 “The Naked Truth”

(Dir by Sara Rose, originally aired on July 25th, 1999)

When a wealthy sorority girl is found dead on the beach with her head caved in, it falls to the bicycle patrol to solve the case. Where are the Homicide detectives? We know that the Santa Monica PD has a homicide division because Chris keeps talking about transferring there. I know I bring this up every episode but it simply doesn’t make sense for the bike cops to be the ones investigating all of these crimes. I mean, essentially, they’re traffic cops. In the real world, they’re job would be to secure the crime scene and wait for the real detectives to show up.

Anyway, when Monica sees that the dead girl was wearing a sequined bikini, she immediately deduces that she was working as a stripper. (I’m not sure that logic would hold hope in court but whatever.) Why would a rich sorority girl be working at a strip club? Monica and Chris go undercover to find out. Chris is the new housemother at the sorority house. Monica is a new pledge. It turns out that working at the strip club started as a hazing ritual but now, all of the girls are being blackmailed (via email, we’re specifically told) into doing it.

Who is the blackmailer? That mystery is solved when Chris catches the local handyman going through her underwear. The handyman explains that he’s not a murderer, he’s just a pervert. He also says that all of the girls have expensive underwear except for one who owns “K-mart panties.” Because that girl is poor and a computer science major, Monica and Chris decide that she’s the blackmailer. (Again, I’m not sure that logic would hope up in court but whatever. I’m too tired to argue with this stupid show.) I guess the lesson here is to spend money on quality panties. Well, don’t worry, Pacific Blue! I buy and wear only the best!

As for the murderer, it turns out to be a cowboy with a country accent who is always hanging out at the strip club and requesting a private dance. It really wasn’t that much of a shock.

Pacific Blue always talks a big game about how women shouldn’t be objectified but then every episode opens with random bikini shots and this episode looked for every possible excuse to put Monica in a school girl outfit. I’d have more respect for Pacific Blue if it was just honest about what it is was doing as opposed to having the characters constantly spouting a lot of cliches about empowerment that the show itself doesn’t seem to take all that seriously.

The good thing about this episode is that it ends with Chris telling TC that they need some time apart. I agree! You can do better, Chris!

This week, Del Toro returns!

Episode 4.13 “Saving Serenity”

(Dir by Michael Levine, originally aired on January 10th, 1999)

When last we saw former series regular Victor Del Toro (played by Marcos A. Ferraez), he was quitting the force after nearly being indicted for killing the man who killed his fiancée. In this episode, Victor finally returns to Santa Monica.

Victor has spent the last five months wandering. He now has bleached blonde hair and a serious drinking problem. When a robber attempts to hold up the bar where Victor is getting drunk, Victor struggles with him. The thief ends up getting shot. Victor grabs the thief’s gun and runs from the bar.

Victor is on the verge of shooting himself on the pier when he sees a woman named Carmen Rios (Angela Alvarado). Carmen reveals that she’s searching for her daughter, Serenity. Serenity was taken away by her biological father. Carmen wants to find her daughter and escape to Mexico with her. Victor agrees to help.

Victor shows up at the Pacific Blue headquarters and announces that he wants to rejoin the force. But, in reality, he just wants to steal the files concerning Serenity’s whereabouts. Later, Victor fakes a bomb threat at the main police station so that he can steal another casefile. TC, Chris, and Cory all reuses to believe that Victor could be involved in anything illegal. Bobby Cruz is convinced that Victor is the one who shot the robber at the bar.

And really, Bobby has reason to be concerned about Victor’s desire to return to Pacific Blue. Victor is a young, handsome Latino who overcame a rough childhood to become a respected bike cop and he’s extremely protective of his younger sister. Bobby, who was introduced after Victor left the show, is also a young, handsome Latino who overcame a rough childhood to become a respected bike cop and he’s also extremely protective of his younger sister. Because the show’s writers were too lazy to actually come up with a new character, Bobby basically is Victor. If Victor returns, the show won’t need Bobby around anymore.

Fortunately, for Bobby, Victor is dead by the end of this episode. He reunites Carmen and Serenity and then drags Serenity’s father out to the pier. Holding a gun to the father’s head, Victor forces the man to repeat the serenity prayer. Cory, TC, and Chris all have their guns drawn. “No!” they all shout in slow motion before opening fire. Victor plunges off the pier and hits the sand below.

OH MY GOD, THEY KILLED VICTOR!

Well, it depends on how you look at it. It turns out that none of them could actually bring themselves to shoot Victor. They just shot up in the air. And then Victor …. well, who knows? The show implies that Victor jumped but, from what I saw, it looks like he was startled and fell backwards. In other words, his friends may not have shot Victor but he might still be alive if they hadn’t fired.

Victor does indeed die at the end of this episode. Wow, Pacific Blue got dark! And I do have to admit that this is actually the best episode of Pacific Blue that I’ve watched so far. Admittedly, it’s a low bar to clear but the whole episode was just so melodramatic and over-the-top that it actually managed to hold my attention in a way that this show usually doesn’t. Those three slow motion shots of people shouting, “Noooooo!” in a row really were worth the price of admission.

So, Victor’s dead. But at least Bobby’s place on the team is secure.