4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!
Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy 63rd birthday to David Fincher! It’s time for….
4 Shots from 4 David Fincher Films
Seven (1995, dir by David Fincher. DP: Darius Khondji)
Fight Club (1999, dir by David Fincher, DP: Jeff Croneweth)
Zodiac (2007, dir by David Fincher, DP: Harris Savides)
Mank (2020, dir by David Fincher, DP: Erik Messerschmidt)
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.
This week, Coach Denardo has a bad dream and put the future of the Bulls in jeopardy.
Episode 1.7 “Uneasy Lies The Head”
(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on January 6th, 1985)
After having a nightmare in which the members of the Bulls all appear as parts of his failing body and a demonic linebacker (Donald Gibb) and a saintly quarterback (Jeff East) tell him that he has to decide whether he wants to go to Heaven or Hell, Coach Denardo fears that his time is up.
At the next game, Denardo is distracted. He calls the last time out, not realizing that he doesn’t have any left. The clocks runs out while the Bulls are trying to get set up for field goal. “Time out! Time out!” Denardo yells. “You have no time left, coach,” the referee replies, which is maybe not the best way to speak to a man recovering from a heart attack. As for the game, it’s a humiliating loss. Denardo says that he might have to retire….
Yeah, that sounds about right. I don’t know much about football but I can tell that Denardo made a lot of mistakes in the course of just two minutes. Get that old man out there! Heck, just let Diane coach like she did last week….
Diane decides to trick Denardo into staying. She rolls a really old computer out during practice and lets it call the plays. Denardo gets angry. No machine is going to replace Ernie Denardo!
Meanwhile, Bubba (Prince Hughes) upsets his mother-in-law.
Seriously, that’s the entire episode. That’s all that happens. I know it doesn’t sound like much but what can I tell you? I sat through this and spent the whole time wondering when the episode’s actual story was going to start and it really didn’t. Denardo had a bad dream. Bubba upset his mother-in-law. That’s it.
This episode was forgettable. Diane should have fired Denardo after that loss. I fear the Bulls aren’t going to make it to whatever this show’s version of the Super Bowl is.
4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!
Today, TSL wishes a happy birthday to cinematographer Robert Richardson. It’s time for….
4 Shots From 4 Robert Richardson Films
JFK (1991, dir by Oliver Stone, DP: Robert Richardson)
The Horse Whisperer (1998. dir by Robert Redford, DP: Robert Richardson)
Inglourious Basterds (2009, dir by Quentin Tarantino, DP: Robert Richardson)
Hugo (2011, dir by Martin Scorsese, DP: Robert Richardson)
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.
It’s time for more bicycle action.
Episode 2.17 “Runaway”
(Dir by Charles Siebert, originally aired on January 19th, 1997)
A teenage girl (Boti Bliss) is missing on the boardwalk. Maggie Garrity (Justina Vail), who runs the local shelter, is looking for her. When she asks the bike patrol for help, TC is dismissive up until he looks up from his paperwork and sees Maggie. I’ve noticed that this is a patten with the bike patrol. It’s rare that they do anything until they see it will involve hanging out with an attractive members of the opposite sex.
TC recruits Chris to help him put up flyers. Chris rolls her eyes because, seriously, why should a member of law enforcement be concerned with a teenage girl who has been abducted by a pimp (Gene Lythgow) and his psycho girlfriend (Ami Dolenz)? Personally, I would dread working for Chris because she never stops complaining. It says a lot about this show that the we’re nearly done with the second season and Chris still doesn’t have a personality beyond being whiny.
TC falls for Maggie but Maggie’s a nun! After they manage to rescue the missing girl, TC asks Maggie if maybe she could stop being a nun for a new nights so that they could go out on a date. Maggie says that it doesn’t work like that. What I find interesting is that TC has no problem casually asking Maggie to give up her vows just because he wants to date her. Hey, TC — this is why you’re single!
Meanwhile, Palermo has new expensive bicycle. What a dork. When the bike gets stolen, Victor has to find it. Palermo sure is mad about his missing bike. What a loser.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites. Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.
This week, Lawrence ruins everything.
Episode 7.7 “The Wedding/Castaways”
(Dir by Bob Sweeney, originally aired on November 26th, 1983)
Ugh, this episode.
Nerdy Fred Connors (Richard Gilliland) wants to spend a weekend alone with a beautiful woman. His favorite supermodel, Christy Robbins (Phyllis Davis), has been pressured by her manager (Steve Perry) into agreeing to spend the weekend with Fred at Pelican Cove. Fred and Christy will have their picture taken before and after their weekend together to show just how much spending time alone with Christy Robbins will improve one’s outlook on life.
Let’s just stop here and state the obvious. This makes ZERO sense. Christy’s manager has no idea who Fred is. He doesn’t even meet Fred until it’s time to him and Christy to go to Pelican Cove. Christy is a world-famous model. In what world would a celebrity agree to be abandoned on an isolated island with a total stranger? The photographers aren’t staying on the island with them. Instead, Christy and Fred are dropped off on the island and then everyone else leaves. If I was Christy, I would get a new manager.
A rival model named Celina Morgan (Shannon Tweed) was also up for the “abandoned on an island with a possible sex maniac” gig and she’s upset that she lost out to Christy. So, she sneaks out to Pelican Bay herself and soon, she and Christy are fighting over the right to spend their time with Fred. It’s dumb and it makes no sense and, considering that the whole fantasy is basically two beautiful woman fighting over one dorky guy, it’s actually feels a bit demeaning and mean-spirited.
Of course, it’s nowhere near as mean-spirited as the other fantasy. Lucy Gorman (Jeannie Wilson) is unhappy in her marriage to Dr. Jack Gorman (Gordon Thomson). She tells Roarke that the only good thing that came out of her marriage was her daughter (Andrea Barber) but Lucy even feels jealous of her! Lucy wants to go back to her wedding day so she can see what would happen if she left her husband at the altar and pursued another doctor (Richard Pierson).
Well, the main that would happen is that Lucy’s daughter would never be born. But somehow, this doesn’t occur to Lucy until the fantasy has started. How would that not occur to a mother? This fantasy was …. I can’t even begin to describe how annoying it was. Lucy came across as being very self-centered and kind of dumb.
I swear, the seventh season has just been terrible so far and I blame one person.
And, no, it’s not Mr. Roarke.
Seriously, ever since Lawrence showed up, the Island just hasn’t been the same. Are we sure that Lawrence isn’t the Devil? I mean, I know the Devil was traditionally played by Roddy McDowall on this show but I’m sure he change his appearance. There’s something sinister about Lawrence and I don’t trust him. He doesn’t care about Roarke and he doesn’t care about the fantasies.
What a disappointing trip to the Island. Traditionally, the last season of any show is usually the worst but it’s still painful to watch Fantasy Island misfire like it did with this episode.
4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films is all about letting the visuals do the talking.
It’s always a good time to pay tribute to Ed Wood.
4 Shots From 4 Ed Wood Films
Bride of the Monster (1955, dir by Edward D. Wood, Jr.)
Plan 9 From Outer Space (1956, dir by Edward D. Wood, Jr)
Night of the Ghouls (1958, dir by Edward D. Wood, Jr)
The Sinister Urge (1960, dir by Edward D. Wood, Jr.)
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!
This week, two sets of thieves cause trouble!
Episode 4.10 “Forty Tons Of Trouble”
(Dir by Gordon Hessler, originally aired on January 11th, 1981)
A group of criminals is stealing equipment from construction sites and selling it on the black market. An attempt to steal a loader leads to it rolling down a Los Angeles street until Baker is able to jump onto it and crash it into a (hopefully) abandoned building. Getraer points out that Baker just destroyed a building. Baker shrugs and says he’s always wanted to do that.
A different group of criminals is stealing parts for their drag racer. The CHiPs have their own car entered into the drag races. Of course, it’s driven by Ponch.
After two accidents on the highway and several chases, Baker and Ponch (but mostly Ponch) capture the bad guys. Paula Kohl (Mary Louise Weller), the owner of Kohl Construction, appreciates the efforts of Baker and Ponch (but mostly Ponch).
In other words, this was a typical episode of CHiPs. Still, it’s memorable because of the supporting cast. Amongst the construction site thieves is Robert Englund. Englund thinks that Sarge (Taylor Lacher) is taking to many risks when it comes to trying to steal loaders and bulldozers but Sarge is like, “I got it under control.” Meanwhile, amongst the drag race thieves, is Chris Mulkey. Mulkey doesn’t get to do much but he does get two scenes where he smirks at Ponch. Sadly, both characters end up getting arrested during this episode but have no fear. Robert Englund went on to play Freddy Krueger. Chris Mulkey went on to play the sleazy but strangely likable Hank Jennings on Twin Peaks.
As for the rest of the episode — hey, I don’t ask for much from CHiPs. As long as there’s a good crash scene and a lot of cool cars, I’m happy. This episode delivered. One could ask why Ponch is always the one who gets to do the cool things, like driving in the race and taking Paula out on a fancy date. Earlier seasons usually tried to portray Ponch and Baker as being equals. This season, though, has clearly been The Ponch Show. It’s a legitimate criticism but …. eh. Sometimes, you just want to watch a chase or two.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show can be purchased on Prime!
This week, Trudy is once again the main character. Fortunately, there’s no UFOs this time around.
Episode 4.17 “Hell Hath No Fury”
(Dir by Virgil W. Vogel, originally aired on March 11th, 1988)
Alan Beaks (Don Harvey), the scion of a prominent Florida family, has been released from prison after serving only a few years for raping a black school teacher named Ellen Mason (Carla Brothers). Beaks claims that he’s reformed and, at the start of the episode, he appears on a talk show where the audience agrees that Alan Beaks is the perfect example of someone who has straightened out his life.
“I wouldn’t want it to happen to me,” one woman in the audience says, “but if it did, I would hope he would be as charming as Alan Beaks.”
Beaks now wants to make a public apology to Ellen. However, she refuses to see him. When she starts to get threatening phone calls, both she and her best friend Trudy are convinced that Beaks is the one calling.
Castillo, however, doesn’t want Trudy to have anything to do with Ellen or Beaks. It’ll make the Vice Quad look bad, he says. (Since when has Castillo ever used that type of logic?) Still, when Ellen hires a hitman (John Finn) to kill Beaks, the Vice Squad finds itself involved. No one on the Squad has any sympathy for Beaks and they don’t make much of an effort to protect him. When a shootout leaves both Beaks and the hitman dead, Castillo tells the members of the Squad that they have failed and if they’re not going to full commit themselves to the job, they can transfer to another department. Meanwhile, even with Beaks dead, Ellen is still getting phone calls, implying the Beaks was actually not her stalker. The episode ends with a terrified Ellen listening as the caller threatens her….
Here’s my number one question about this episode: Why didn’t anyone trace the calls? Ellen, the victim in a high-profile rape case, is getting calls from someone threatening to harm her. That right there seems like the sort of thing that the police would normally investigate. Trudy is Ellen’s best friend. Trudy knows about the calls. Trudy is a cop. So, why didn’t the Vice Squad try to track down the caller? If they could have proven that Beaks was the caller, Beaks would have gone back to prison. If it turned out that someone else was the caller, that person would have gone to prison. Beaks would still be free but at least Ellen wouldn’t be getting threatened every ten minutes. In the past, that’s what would have happened on this show. For some reason, this episode features everyone forgetting how to act like a cop.
In the end, this episode tried to deal with a lot of issues — tabloid journalism, rehabilitation, vigilante justice, racism, classism — but it ultimately felt like fan faction that was written by someone who really didn’t know much about the show or the characters. (One would think that Gina, a rape survivor who gunned down her rapist during the first season, would have some thoughts on Ellen’s plan but instead, she spends the episode cheerfully exchanging one-liners with Switek.) This was another Season 4 disappointment.
Today, on Sean Connery’s birthday, our song of the day is the theme for one of my favorite Bond films. I know that some people claim that Diamonds are Forever is a lesser Bond film but personally, I think it’s just silly enough to be effective. James Bond and Las Vegas are a match made in heaven.
Today’s scene that I love features Sean Connery, born on this day 95 years ago. In this scene from 1964’s Goldfinger, Connery needs only one simple line — “I must be dreaming,” — to create an iconic moment.
Daniel Craig, as good as an actor as he is, could not have pulled this off. Only Sean Connery could have made this scene unforgettable and that’s why Sean Connery will continue to be the Bond to which all others should be compared.
Through the Shattered Lens