Kid Corey Rides Again”

Posted on May 21, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Almost the entire show is currently streaming on Daily Motion, YouTube, Plex, and a host of other sites.

This week is a busy one as Mr. Roarke deals with several guests, a new assistant …. AND THE DEVIL!

Episode 5.2 “The Devil and Mr. Roarke/Ziegfeld Girls/Kid Corey Rides Again”

(Dir by Don Chaffey, originally aired on October 17th, 1981)

The plane lands at the Island, carrying four people in search of a fantasy. Waiting to greet them are Mr. Roarke, Tattoo, and Julie. After being told that she wasn’t ready to greet the guests last week, Julie has finally been promoted. And if you thought that Mr. Roarke and Tattoo occasionally had an awkward chemistry, it’s nothing compared to how awkward things feel with a third person cheerfully taking part in their conversations. Wendy Schaal is likable enough as Julie but it’s hard to understand why, in-universe, the character is there.

As for our guests, Joan (Barbi Benton in old-age makeup) and Rubi (Audrey Landers, in even more old-age makeup) are former Ziegfeld girls who want to relive their youth. Joan’s niece, Billie (Betty Kennedy), is appearing in a Ziegfeld-style revue that is being directed by Carl Wagner (Dack Rambo). Mr. Roarke agree to make Rubi and Joan young again, with the understanding that it will only be for the weekend and that they can’t tell anyone about their fantasy while they’re experiencing it. The women agree and are overjoyed when they are transformed into their younger selves. (I’m going to guess that Benton and Landers were probably even happier to ditch the old age makeup.) Rubi promptly decides to steal Carl away from Billie. Joan is shocked by Rubi’s behavior and she has to decide whether to allow her friend to live her fantasy or to tell the truth about what she and Rubi are doing on the island.

Also going into the past is a meek shoe salesman named Ned Plummer (Arte Johnson). Ned wants to go back to the old west so that he can meet his hero, outlaw Kid Corey. Corey is famous for disappearing after pulling off a million dollar robbery. Ned even has an old picture of Corey in which Corey possesses a definite resemblance to Ned himself. Mr. Roarke warns Ned that, when he goes to the past, the bullets will be real and he won’t be able to return to the present until his fantasy is over. Given a magic horse, Ned rides into the past and promptly meets Kid Corey (Jack Elam).

It turns out that Kid Corey doesn’t look like Ned. It also turns out that Kid Corey is not the Robin Hood-type figure that he was made out to be in the history books. Kid Corey isn’t even a Kid! He’s an irascible old man who doesn’t lift a finger when Ned is arrested by Sheriff Matt (Cameron Mitchell, naturally enough), taken to jail, and sentenced to hang. Oh no! It sound like it’s time for Mr. Roarke to save Ned, right? Well, Mr. Roarke is busy with another situation so it’s Tattoo who shows up in Ned’s fantasy and, oddly, Tattoo doesn’t seem to be that worried about Ned getting executed. Maybe Tattoo is planning on blaming it all on Julie. (That said, it is nice to see Tattoo get to do something more than just as Mr. Roarke questions. In this episode, Herve Villechaize seems to be enjoying the chance to show off his snarky side.)

What is occupying Mr. Roarke’s attention? Well, Satan (Roddy McDowall) has returned to the Island. He claims that he’s just looking for a relaxing weekend but it soon becomes obvious that, once again, he wants Roarke’s soul. Mr. Roarke warns Julie to be careful what she says around the Devil. So, of course, Julie promptly offers to give away her soul.

Now, in Julie’s defense, she was trying to save a guest who was drowning in quicksand and what she said is that she would do anything to save the guest’s life. Satan hears and saves the guest in return for Julie giving him her soul at midnight. Still, I have to wonder why Julie hadn’t been previously trained on how to pull someone out of quicksand. I mean, if she’s ready to meet the guests then I would think that Roarke would have given her quicksand training. That really seems like the first thing that someone should learn when they start working on Fantasy Island.

(For that matter, why is there so much quicksand on a resort!?)

Satan — surprise! — is willing to call off his deal with Julie in return for Roarke giving up his soul at midnight. Roarke agrees but then he tricks Satan by singing a contract transferring possession of his soul to Julie. Since Roarke’s soul is now Julie’s, Roarke can’t get give it away. Because the overly cocky Satan spends too much time gloating and then gets upset over being conned, he loses track of time and the midnight hour passes without Satan taking anyone’s souls.

(I’m not sure if any of this would hold up in court but, to be honest, I don’t really know much about contract law.)

With three stories and a new sidekick to introduce, this was a very busy episode. The Ziegfeld and the Old West fantasies were nicely done. The Ziegfeld costumes were to die for and Jack Elam was memorably uncouth in the role of Kid Corey. That said, as you can probably guess, the main attraction here is Roddy McDowall hamming it up as the Devil. He and Montalban both seem to be having a lot of fun in this episode and their confrontation is entertaining to watch. I wish Julie hadn’t been portrayed as being such a naive fool but still, this was an enjoyable weekend on the Island.

The TSL Horror Grindhouse: Creature From Black Lake (dir by Joy N. Houck, Jr.)

Posted on October 12, 2023 by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s Bigfoot time!

1976’s Creature From Black Lake tells the story of two students at the University of Chicago. Pahoo (Dennis Fimple) and Rives (John David Carson) decide that they want to spend their Spring Break on the Arkansas/Louisiana border, researching the legend that a Bigfoot-like creature that lives in the bayous. (The creature is obviously based on the legendary Fouke Monster, who was also the subject of the 1972 documentary, The Legend of Boggy Creek.)

Pahoo and Rives head down South, looking to interview anyone who has seen the Creature From Black Lake. Some people are willing to talk to them and they tell stories involving the Creature causing cars to crash, killing dogs, and attacking fisherman. The Creature does not sound nice at all. Still, the majority of the people in town don’t really feel like opening up to two Yankee monster hunters. They’re worried that Pahoo and Rives are only in town because they want to portray everyone as being a bunch of ignorant rednecks who are scared of things that go bump in the night.

And really, they have every right to be concerned. I grew up all over the South and the Southwest. My family briefly lived in Fouke, the home of the Fouke Monster. (No, I never saw or heard the monster, mostly because the monster doesn’t exist.) When I was a kid, I lived in both Louisiana and Arkansas, among other states. From my own personal experience, I can tell you that there is no one more condescending than a Northerner who is visiting the South for the very first time. “Why is it so hot?” “Why is everyone down here so polite?” “Why can’t I find a Wawa!?” Seriously, it gets old really quickly. Now, to their credit, Pahoo and Rives are actually pretty polite and considerate when talking to the people who think that they have seen the Creature From Black Lake. But still, one can understand why the town isn’t exactly thrilled to have them asking about monsters.

Anyway, after interviewing both Jack Elam and Dub Taylor about their experiences with the monster and getting yelled at by the local sheriff (played by Bill Thurman), Pahoo and Rives head out to the local swamp, hoping to find the creature themselves. That, of course, turns out to be a huge mistake on their part.

Creature From Black Lake is a deliberately-paced film, which is a polite way of saying that it’s a bit slow. Obviously inspired by The Legend of Boggy Creek, a good deal of the film is taken up with scenes of Pahoo and Rives interviewing people about their encounters with the monster. That said, the film definitely picks up when Pahoo and Rives head into the swamp themselves and their eventual meeting with the monster is well-directed. I have to admit that I spent this entire film dreading the moment when it would be revealed that the Monster was actually misunderstood and peaceful and I appreciated that the film did not go that route. The creature turns out to be no one’s friend and is genuinely menacing.

The cast is full of familiar county character actors, all of whom do a good job bringing their characters to life. Dennis Fimple and John David Carson are likable as the two students. This film was also an early credit for cinematographer Dean Cudney and, just as he would later do for John Carpenter, Cudney creates a perfectly ominous atmosphere of isolation. Creature From Black Lake may start out slow but, ultimately, it’s an effective creature feature.

Cannonball Run II (1984, directed by Hal Needham)

Posted on January 1, 2021 by Jedadiah Leland

In 1981, director Hal Needham and star Burt Reynolds had a surprise hit with The Cannonball Run. Critics hated the film about a race from one end of America to the other but audiences flocked to watch Burt and a group of familiar faces ham it up while cars crashed all around them. The original Cannonball Run is a goofy and gloriously stupid movie and it can still be fun to watch. The sequel, on the other hand…

When the sequel begins, the Cannonball Run has been discontinued. The film never explains why the race is no longer being run but then again, there’s a lot that the sequel doesn’t explain. King Abdul ben Falafel (Ricardo Montalban, following up The Wrath of Khan with this) wants his son, The Sheik (Jamie Farr, returning from the first film) to win the Cannonball so he puts up a million dollars and announces that the race is back on. Problem solved.

With the notable exceptions of Farrah Fawcett, Roger Moore, and Adrienne Barbeau, almost everyone from the first film returns to take another shot at the race. Burt Reynolds and Dom DeLuise are back. Jack Elam returns as the crazy doctor, though he’s riding with the Sheik this time. Jackie Chan returns, riding with Richard “Jaws” Kiel. Dean Martin and Sammy Davis, Jr. return, playing barely disguised versions of themselves. They’re joined by the surviving members of the Rat Pack. Yes, Frank Sinatra is in this thing. He plays himself and, from the way his scenes are shot, it’s obvious they were all filmed in a day and all the shots of people reacting to his presence were shot on another day. Shirley MacClaine also shows up, fresh from having won an Oscar. She plays a fake nun who rides with Burt and Dom. Burt, of course, had a previous chance to co-star with Shirley but he turned down Terms of Endearment so he could star in Stroker Ace. Cannonball Run II finally gave the two a chance to act opposite each other, though no one would be winning any Oscars for appearing in this film.

Say what you will about Hal Needham as a director, he was obviously someone who cultivated a lot of friendships in Hollywood because this film is jam-packed with people who I guess didn’t have anything better to do that weekend. Telly Savalas, Michael V. Gazzo, Henry Silva, Abe Vigoda, and Henry Silva all play gangsters. Jim Nabors plays Homer Lyle, a country-fried soldier who is still only a private despite being in his 50s. Catherine Bach and Susan Anton replace Adrienne Barbeau and Tara Buckman as the two racers who break traffic laws and hearts with impunity. Tim Conway, Don Knotts, Foster Brooks, Sid Caesar, Arte Johnson, Mel Tillis, Doug McClure, George “Goober” Lindsey, and more; Needham found room for all of them in this movie. He even found roles for Tony Danza and an orangutan. (Marilu Henner is also in the movie so I guess Needham was watching both Taxi and Every Which Way But Loose while casting the film.) Needham also came up with a role for Charles Nelson Reilly, who is cast as a mafia don in Cannonball Run II. His name is also Don so everyone refers to him as being “Don Don.” That’s just a typical example of the humor that runs throughout Cannonball Run II. If you thought the humor of It’s A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World was too subtle and cerebral, Cannonball Run II might be right up your alley.

The main problem with Cannonball Run II is that there’s not much time spent on the race, which is strange because that’s the main reason why anyone would want to watch this movie. The race itself doesn’t start until 45 minutes into this 108 minute film and all the racers are quickly distracted by a subplot about the Mafia trying to kidnap the Sheik. Everyone stops racing so that Dean Martin and Sammy Davis, Jr. can disguise themselves as belly dancers to help rescue the Sheik. By the time that’s all been taken care of, there’s only 10 minutes left for everyone to race across the country. After a montage of driving scenes and a cartoon of an arrow stretching across the nation (the cartoon was animated by Ralph Bakshi!), we discover who won the Cannonball and then it’s time for a montage of Burt and Dom blowing their lines and giggling. Needham always ended his films with a montage of everyone screwing up a take and it’s probably one of his most lasting cinematic contributions. Every blooper reel that’s ever been included as a DVD or Blu-ray extra owes a debt of gratitude to Hal Needham. Watching people blow their lines can be fun if you’ve just watched a fun movie but watching Burt and Dom amuse themselves after sitting through Cannonball Run II is just adding insult to injury. It feels less like they’re laughing at themselves and more like they’re laughing at you for being stupid enough to sit through a movie featuring Tony Danza and an orangutan.

The dumb charm of the first Cannonball Run is nowhere to be found in this sequel and, though the film made a profit, the box office numbers were still considered to be a disappointment when compared to the other films that Reynolds and Needham collaborated on. Along with Stroker Ace, this is considered to be one of the films that ended Reynolds’s reign as a top box office attraction. Cannonball Run II was also the final feature film to feature Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra. This could be considered the final Rat Pack film, though I wouldn’t say that too loudly.

Cannonball Run II is a disappointment on so many levels. It’s hard to believe that the same director who did Smokey and the Bandit and Hooper could be responsible for the anemic stunts and chases found in this movie. The cast may have had a good time but the audience is left bored. Stick with the first Cannonball Run.

Gun Belt (1953, directed by Ray Nazarro)

Posted on September 15, 2020 by Jedadiah Leland

Outlaw Matt Ringo (John Dehner) escapes from prison and reunites with his old gang. Riding out to Tombstone, Matt tracks down his son, Chip (Tab Hunter). Chip is now living with his uncle, Billy Ringo (George Montgomery). Billy was once a member of Matt’s gang but he’s gone straight, he’s given up his guns, and he now has a ranch of his own. Billy tries to keep the naive Chip from idolizing his father but Chip is bored with life on the ranch. Matt not only works to turn Chip against his uncle but he also frames Billy for a bank robbery. With the town convinced that Billy has returned to his outlaw ways, Billy has no choice but to reach out to the most honest lawman in town, Wyatt Earp (James Millican).

The most interesting thing about this western is the way that it blends real people, like Wyatt and his brother Virgil (Bruce Cowling), with characters who were obviously fictionalized versions of the participants in the gunfight at the OK Corral. The Ringos are obviously based on Johnny Ringo who, as anyone who has seen Tombstone has seen you, never went straight in real life. Meanwhile, the head of the gang is named Ike Clinton. Did someone misspell Ike Clanton’s name while writing the script or was the name really changed for some unknown reason? Ike Clanton wasn’t around to sue over the way he was portrayed in the movie.

Beyond the mix of a little truth with a lot of fiction, Gun Belt is a traditional western with bad outlaws and upstanding lawmen and a naive cowpoke who has to decide whether he wants to follow the path of good or evil. George Montgomery has the right presence to be a believable as both a retired outlaw and rancher and James Millican brings quiet authority to the film’s version of Wyatt Earp. Western fans will be happy to see Jack Elam in the role of one of the gang members. The only really false note is provided by Tab Hunter, who comes across as very young and very callow and not believable at all as someone who could work on a ranch or successfully pursue a career as a professional lawbreaker.

Seven years after it was released, Gun Belt was remade as Five Guns To Tombstone.

End of the Trail: James Stewart in Anthony Mann’s THE MAN FROM LARAMIE (Columbia 1955)

Posted on July 23, 2019 by gary loggins

cracked rear viewer

I’ve covered several of the Anthony Mann/James Stewart Western collaborations here. Their final sagebrush outing together THE MAN FROM LARAMIE was shot in Cinemascope and gorgeous Technicolor, features a bunch of solid character actors, has beautiful New Mexico scenery… yet felt like a letdown to me. Maybe it’s because Mann and Stewart set the bar so high in their previous Westerns, but THE MAN FROM LARAMIE is an anti-climactic climax to the director/star duo’s pairings.

Stewart’s good as always, playing bitter Will Lockhart, whose brother was killed by Apaches and whose mission is to find out who’s selling the guns to them. But the film came off flat, feeling like just another routine Western – good, but not in the same category as WINCHESTER ’73 or BEND OF THE RIVER. Those Mann film noir touches are nowhere to be found, replaced by (dare I say it!)… soap opera elements!

Cathy…

View original post 356 more words

Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door: PAT GARRETT AND BILLY THE KID (MGM 1973)

Posted on August 28, 2017 by gary loggins

cracked rear viewer

(PAT GARRETT AND BILLY THE KID airs tonight at 11:45 EST on TCM. Do yourselves a favor… watch it!)

PAT GARRETT AND BILLY THE KID was director Sam Peckinpah’s final Western, and as usual it’s about more than just the Old West. It’s about the new breed vs the old establishment, about the maverick auteur vs the old studio guard, and about his never-ending battle to make his films his way. The fact that there are six, count ’em, SIX different editors credited tells you what MGM honcho James Aubrey thought of that idea! They butchered over 20 minutes out of the movie, which then proceeded to tank at the box office. Fortunately for us, PAT GARRETT AND BILLY THE KID has been restored to its full glory, and we can enjoy Peckinpah’s original artistic vision.

I’m not going to try to make excuses for Peckinpah; he was a legitimate pain in the ass, a…

View original post 616 more words

Lisa Cleans Out Her DVR: High Noon (dir by Fred Zinnemann)

Posted on May 26, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

(I am currently in the process of cleaning out my DVR! I recorded the 1952 best picture nominee, High Noon, off of Retroplex on January 28th. This review is scheduled to posted at 12 noon, central time. Clever, no?)

High Noon is a testament to the power of simplicity.

It’s a famous film, one that continues to be influential and which is still studied today. It’s known for being one of the greatest westerns ever made but it’s also a powerful political allegory. Even people who haven’t seen the film know that High Noon is the moment of the day when someone shows their true character. Just as everyone knows the plot of Star Wars, regardless of whether they’ve actually watched the film, everyone knows that High Noon is about a town marshal who, after the entire town deserts him, is forced to face down a gang of gunmen on his own.

And yet, it really is a surprisingly simple movie. It’s the quintessential western, filmed in black-and-white and taking place in the type of frontier town that you would expect to find hiding on the back lot of an old movie studio. Though wonderfully brought to life by a talented cast, the majority of the characters are familiar western archetypes.

There’s the aging town marshal, a simple man of integrity. Gary Cooper won an Oscar for playing the role of Will Kane. When we first see Will, he’s getting married in a frontier courtroom. All of the town leaders have come to his wedding and all of them wish him luck in the future. Will is retiring and everyone agrees that the town would never have survived and prospered if not for Will Kane. After all, Will is the one who captured the notorious outlaw, Frank Miller. When the news comes that Miller has been pardoned and will be arriving back in town on the noon train, everyone tells Will that he should just leave town and go on his honeymoon. However, the new marshal will not be arriving for another day and Will is not willing to abandon the town. However, the town is more than willing to abandon him.

Will’s new wife is Amy Fowler (Grace Kelly). Amy is a Quaker and a pacifist. Amy begs Kane to leave town but Kane says that he’s never run from a fight. Amy tells him that she’ll be leaving on that noon train, with or without him. Helen Ramirez (Katy Jurado) is the former girlfriend of both Kane and Miller. She is one of the few people in town to call out everyone else’s cowardice but she is still planning to leave before Miller arrives. As she explains it to Amy, she would never abandon Kane if he were her man but he’s not her man anymore.

The townspeople, who first appear to be so friendly and honest, soon prove themselves to be cowards. None of them are willing to stand behind Will. The Mayor (Thomas Mitchell) publicly castigates Will for staying in town and putting everyone else in danger. Deputy Harvey Pell (Lloyd Bridges) says that he’ll only help Will if Will recommends him as his replacement. The town minister (Morgan Farley) is more concerned with why Will was married by the justice of the peace, instead of in the church. The town judge (Otto Kruger) leaves early, saying he can be a judge in some other town. One of the few people to show Will any sympathy is the former marshal (Lon Chaney, Jr.) but, unfortunately, he is too old and crippled by arthritis to provide any help.

Though it all, Frank’s gang sits at the train station and waits for Frank to arrive. One gang member is played be Lee Van Cleef. He looks really mean!

With a brisk running time of 84 minutes, High Noon unfolds in real time. Throughout the film, as Kane grows increasingly desperate in his attempt to find anyone brave enough to stand with him, we see clocks in the background of nearly every scene. We hear the ticking. We know that both noon and Frank Miller are getting closer and closer. We know that, soon, Will will have no other option but to stand on the street by himself and defend a town that doesn’t deserve him.

It’s simple but it’s undeniably powerful.

It’s been said that High Noon was meant to be a metaphor for the blacklist. Frank Miller and his gang were the fascists that, having been defeated in World War II, were now coming back to power. Will Kane was a stand-in for all the men and women of integrity who found themselves blacklisted. The townspeople represented the studio execs who refused to challenge the blacklist. That’s the theory and it’s probably true. But, honestly, the political metaphor of High Noon works because it can be applied to any situation. Will Kane is anyone who has ever had to face down the forces of totalitarianism. He is anyone who has ever had the courage to take a lonely stand while everyone else cowered in the corner.

It’s a powerful metaphor and it’s also a genuinely entertaining movie. The gunfight is thrilling. The romance between Will and Amy feels real. Even the town feels like an actual place, one that has its own history and culture. It’s a simple film but it’s a great film.

Like a lot of great films, High Noon was nominated for best picture. And, like a lot of great films, it lost. In High Noon‘s case, it lost to a film that is almost its exact opposite, The Greatest Show on Earth. However, Gary Cooper did win an Oscar for his unforgettable performance as Will Kane.

I think we tend to take classic films for granted. Don’t do that with High Noon. See it the next chance you get.

A Movie A Day #126: Baby Face Nelson (1957, directed by Don Siegel)

Posted on May 13, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

The place is Chicago. The time is the era of Prohibition. The head of the Chicago Outfit, Rocca (Ted de Corsia), has arranged for a career criminal named Lester Gillis (Mickey Rooney) to be released from prison. A crack shot and all-around tough customer, Gillis has only two insecurities: his diminutive height and his youthful appearance. Rocca wants to use Gillis as a hit man but Gillis prefers to rob banks. When Rocca attempts to frame Gillis for a murder, Gillis first guns down his former benefactor and then goes on the run with his girlfriend, Sue Nelson (Carolyn Jones). Because they are both patients of the same underworld doctor (played by Sir Cedric Hardwicke), Gillis eventually meets public enemy number one, John Dillinger (Leo Gordon). Joining Dillinger’s gang, Gillis becomes a famous bank robber and is saddled with a nickname that he hates: Baby Face Nelson.

While it is true that Lester “Baby Face Nelson” Gillis was an associate of John Dillinger’s and supposedly hated his nickname, the rest of this biopic is highly fictionalized. The real Baby Face Nelson was a family man who, when he went on the run, took his wife and two children with him. While he did get his start running with a Chicago street gang, there is also no evidence that Nelson was ever affiliated with the Chicago Outfit. (The film’s Rocca is an obvious stand-in for Al Capone.) In real life, it was Dillinger, having just recently escaped from jail, who hooked up with Nelson’s gang. The film Nelson is jealous of Dillinger and wants to take over the gang but, in reality, the gang had no leader. Because Nelson killed three FBI agents (more than any other criminal), he has developed a reputation for being one of the most dangerous of the Depression-era outlaws but, actually, he was no more violent than the typical 1930s bank robber. Among the era’s outlaws, Dillinger was more unique for only having committed one murder over the course of his career. In this film (and practically every other film that has featured Baby Face Nelson as a character), Nelson is a full on psychopath, one who even aims his gun at children.

Baby Face Nelson may be terrible history but it is still an excellent B-movie. Don Siegel directs in his usual no-nonsense style and Mickey Rooney does a great job, playing Baby Face Nelson as a ruthless but insecure criminal with a perpetual chip on his shoulder. As his fictional girlfriend, Carolyn Jones is both tough and sexy, a moll that any gangster would be lucky to have waiting for him back at the safe house. B-movie veterans like Thayer David, Jack Elam, Elisha Cook Jr., and John Hoyt all have colorful supporting roles but the most unexpected name in the cast is that of Cedric Hardwicke, playing an alcoholic surgeon with broken down dignity.

Don’t watch Baby Face Nelson for a history lesson. Watch it for an entertaining B-masterpiece.

The Perfect Crime Film: KANSAS CITY CONFIDENTIAL (United Artists 1952)

Posted on February 11, 2017 by gary loggins

cracked rear viewer

My friend Rob suggested I review KANSAS CITY CONFIDENTIAL awhile back, and I’m sorry I waited so long. This is a film noir lover’s delight, packed with tension, violence, double-crosses, and a head-turning performance by John Payne in the lead. Made on an economical budget like the same year’s THE NARROW MARGIN , director Phil Karlson and George Diskant create a shadowy, claustrophobic atmosphere brimming with danger at every turn.

I knew Payne mainly from his 40’s musicals and his idealistic lawyer opposite Maureen O’Hara in MIRACLE ON 34TH STREET, but he’s a revelation here as Joe Rolfe, a florist truck driver who’s set up as a patsy by a gang of armored car robbers. He can dish out (and take) beatings with the best them, and delivers the tough-talking dialog with aplomb. KANSAS CITY CONFIDENTIAL helped Payne shed his lightweight image, and he went on to do other dark crime films and rugged…

View original post 468 more words

A Movie A Day #6: The Cannonball Run (1981, directed by Hal Needham)

Posted on January 6, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

A legendary Hollywood stuntman, Hal Needham moved into directing in the 1970s and proved that all he required to make a successful film were willing stuntmen, fast cars, Coors beer, and Burt Reynolds. Following that logic, The Cannonball Run may very well be the ultimate Hal Needham movie.

The Cannonball Run follows several teams of racers as they compete to see who can be the first to reach California from Connecticut. Trying to stop them is Arthur J. Foyt (George Furth), who represents the Safety Enforcement Unit and who believes that cars are a menace. However, Foyt is no match for these racers, who include:

J.J. (Burt Reynolds), who is racing in memory of his father, and his mechanic Victor (Dom DeLuise), who turns into Captain Choas whenever he is feeling threatened. J.J. and Victor are driving an ambulance and are accompanied by crazy Dr. Van Helsing (Jack Elam) and a fake “patient” (Farrah Fawcett),
Bradford Compton (Bert Convy) who is riding a motorcycle and who, because of the weight of his mechanic, has to pop a wheelie for the entire race,
An Arab oil sheik (Jamie Farr) who is racing for “the glory of Islam” and who would probably not be in the movie if it were made today,
Sidney Goldfarb (Roger Moore), the heir to a mattress fortune who has had extensive plastic surgery to make himself look like Roger Moore,
Jackie Chan and Michael Hui, called “The Japanese team” even though they both speak Cantonese throughout the entire movie,
Terry Bradsahw and Mel Tillis because why the Hell not?,
Marcie (Adrienne Barbeau) and Jill (Tara Buckman), using their cleavage to get out of speeding tickets, or at least they do until they’re pulled over by Valerie Perrine,
And Dean Martin and Sammy Davis, Jr., pretending to be priests and apparently drunk throughout filming.

Based on a real life (and very illegal) cross-country race that was held four times in the 1970s, The Cannonball Run is profoundly stupid movie that, if you’re in the right mood for it, is also profoundly fun. It’s a movie that really has no plot but it does have a lot of cars, a lot of stunts, a lot of cleavage, and a lot of politically incorrect humor, some of which has not aged well. Despite being hated by the critics, The Cannonball Run was a huge box office hit and it still remains a nostalgic guilty pleasure for a lot of people, myself included. One person who did not like The Cannonball Run was Burt Reynolds who, in an interview with the New York Times, once said, “”I did that film for all the wrong reasons. I never liked it. I did it to help out a friend of mine, Hal Needham. And I also felt it was immoral to turn down that kind of money. I suppose I sold out so I couldn’t really object to what people wrote about me.”

Burt has a point but, in defense of The Cannonball Run, what other movie actually features Jackie Chan beating up Peter Fonda?