Retro Television Review: Homicide: Life On The Street 4.12 “The Hat”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC!  It  can be viewed on Peacock.

This week, incompetence reigns.

Episode 4.12 “The Hat”

(Dir by Peter Medak, originally aired on January 19th, 1996)

There’s a running theme in this week’s episode and that theme is incompetence.

With Russert having been demoted all the way back to detective, there is now a captain’s vacancy.  The squad room is convinced that Giardello is going to get promoted.  For that matter, Giardello is also convinced that he’s going to be promoted.  Instead, the promotion goes to Roger Gaffney (Walt MacPherson), the racist martinet former homicide detective who nearly got into a fist fight with Pembleton during the white glove murder investigation.

(Giardello, for all of his strengths, has never played the political game as well as those around him.)

Munch thinks that a lawyer who he arrested for murder is going to be convicted.  However, it turns out that the video that Brodie shot at the crime scene shows that a key piece of evidence was mishandled.  Munch tells Brodie to erase the tape.  Brodie refuses to tamper with evidence.  (“It’s illegal,” he says.)  As a result, the murderer walks free.  And while it’s true that Brodie’s refusal to erase the tape did lead to an guilty man walking, it’s also true that it wouldn’t have been a problem if the cops on the scene hadn’t screwed up in the first place.

Finally, Lewis and Kellerman are sent to Pennsylvania to pick up Rose Halligan (Lily Tomlin), a woman suspected of murdering her husband in Baltimore.  Lewis and Kellerman are supposed to go straight to Pennsylvania and then come right back to Maryland, without making any unnecessary stops.  Instead, they screw up.  Kellerman decides to stop off at a run-down amusement park that he remembers from his childhood.  Later, Lewis and Kellerman stop off at a diner so they can get some dinner.  When Rose excuses herself to go to the restroom, they not only remove her handcuffs but they also allow her to go unaccompanied.  Needless to say, Rose escapes, makes her way back to Baltimore, and stabs her husband’s mistress to death before getting Lewis and Kellerman track her down.

Lily Tomlin was this episode’s big guest star, for better or worse.  Sometimes, when a big name appears on a television show, it becomes obvious that there wasn’t anyone around who was willing to tell them that they were overacting just a bit and that would certainly seem to be the case here.  Rose is a music teacher so this episode really tests one’s tolerance for Lily Tomlin singing opera.  That said, Tomlin was quietly effective at the end of the episode, sitting out on a porch while her former friend lay dead in the house.  Rose says she was returning her friend’s hate and, indeed, the dead woman in wearing the hat that Rose wore throughout almost the entire episode.

All said, I enjoyed this episode.  Lewis and Kellerman may be incompetent but they’re still entertaining to watch.  As for the hated Roger Gaffney getting the job that Giardello deserved …. well, isn’t that always the way?

Horror Scenes I Love: The Bleeding Hand Scene From The Wizard of Gore


Today’s horror scene that I love comes from 1970’s The Wizard of Gore.  Directed by Herschell Gordon Lewis, this uniquely acted scene should be familiar to anyone who has ever watched the montage that opens most of the Something Weird video releases.

October True Crime: Sins of the Mother (dir by John Patterson)


In the city of Spokane, Washington, Kevin Coe (Dale Midkiff) is a real estate agent who always tries to come across as being the slickest guy in the room.  With his quick smile and his moderately expensive suits, Kevin certainly seems to fit the stereotype.  It’s only when you start to look a little closer that the surface starts to crack.

For someone who goes out of his way to come across as being confident, Kevin is actually very immature and more than a little whiny.  He’s living with a perfectly nice young woman named Ginny (Heather Fairfield) but it’s obvious that he’s keeping secrets from her.  He comes home one morning with scratches on his face and, when she asks about them, he claims that 1) he got mauled by a dog and 2) he doesn’t need any sort of medical attention.  Kevin is someone who frequently loses his job because he’s just not that good at it.  When one boss fires him, Kevin replies that he’s going to start his own business and someday, maybe he’ll be the one doing the hiring and firing.  It’s classic empty cope.

And then there’s Kevin’s mother.  Ruth Coe (Elizabeth Montgomery) is someone who likes to present herself as being a grand diva, in the manner of a Golden Screen star.  She’s extremely close to her son, at times overprotective and at times overly critical.  Kevin often goes from yelling at his mom to dancing with her within minutes.  Ruth makes it clear that she doesn’t like Ginny and Ginny eventually grows to dread seeing Ruth wandering around their house, uninvited.  And yet, despite all of the time that Kevin spends talking about how wants to get away from his mother and to live his own life, Kevin doesn’t really make much of an effort to do that.

Meanwhile, Detective Liz Trent (Talia Balsam) is investigating a series of rapes that have been committed in Spokane.  When she comes to suspect that Kevin is the rapist, Kevin claims that it’s not true and it’s just another case of the world treating him unfairly.  Ruth stands by her son and eventually shocks everyone with just how far she’s willing to go to try to keep him out of prison.

Sins of the Mother is based on a true story.  Kevin Coe may have only been convicted of four rapes but he is suspected of having committed at least 41.  In prison, he insisted he was innocent and refused to attend any counseling programs.  He also refused to apply for parole, even after he became eligible.  After his criminal sentence was completed in 2008, he was sent to the Special Commitment Center on Washington’s McNeil Island, which is a institution that houses sexual predators who are likely to reoffend.  I’m writing this review on September 15th.  Coe, as of this writing, is scheduled to be released from McNeil on October 3rd so, by the time you’re reading this, he could already be out.  Coe is 78 and is reported to be in fragile health.

As for the movie, it’s mostly memorable for Elizabeth Montgomery’s over the top performance as Ruth Coe.  Sweeping into every scene and delivering her lines in what appears to be a deliberately fake-sounding Southern accent, Montgomery chews the scenery with gusto.  While the rest of the cast often seems to be going through the motions, Montgomery grabs hold of this movie and refuses to surrender it.

Horror Song of the Day: Main Theme From Cannibal Holocaust by Riz Ortolani


One of the great oddities of the horror genre and the world of grindhouse films is that 1980’s Cannibal Holocaust has got one of the most beautiful soundtracks ever recorded.  Composed by Riz Ortolani, here is the amazing Main Theme From Cannibal Holocaust.

4 Shots From 4 Horror Films: 1990s Part Three


This October, I’m going to be doing something a little bit different with my contribution to 4 Shots From 4 Films.  I’m going to be taking a little chronological tour of the history of horror cinema, moving from decade to decade.

Today, we complete the 90s!

4 Shots From 4 Horror Films

I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997, dir by Jim Gillepsie)

I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997, dir by Jim Gillepsie)

Vampires (1998, dir by John Carpenter)

Vampires (1998, dir by John Carpenter)

The Sixth Sense (1999, dir by M. Night Shyamalan)

The Sixth Sense (1999, dir by M. Night Shyamalan)

The Blair Witch Project (1999, dir by Daniel Myrick and Eduardo Sanchez)

The Blair Witch Project (1999, dir by Daniel Myrick and Eduardo Sanchez)

Horror On The Lens: Summer of Fear (dir by Wes Craven)


Today’s horror on the lens is a 1978 made-for-TV movie that was directed by Wes Craven.  Originally entitled Stranger In Our House, it was retitled Summer of Fear when it was released into theaters in Europe.  Personally, I think Summer of Fear is a better title.  It has a fun R.L. Stine feel to it.

As for the film itself, it tells the story of what happens when the recently orphaned Julia (Lee Purcell) moves in with her distant relations in California.  At first, Julia fits right in with her new family but, slowly and surely, her cousin Rachel (Linda Blair) comes to suspect that Julia might be a witch.  And hey, who can’t relate to that?  Seriously, everyone has that one cousin…

 

October Positivity: Forgiving God (dir by Jason Campbell and Aaron Dunbar)


2022’s Forgiving God opens with a seance.

Jon Moore (Matthew Utley) and his foster sister are fooling around with a Ouija board.  Jon wants to contact the spirit of his little brother, Tommy (Jacob Pitoniak).  Jon blames himself for his brother’s death and many of his subsequent problems can be linked back to the day that Tommy was killed in a mass shooting.  The Ouija board seems to have a mind of its own, with the little pointer tool moving even when Jon takes his fingers off of it.  Tommy’s face appear in a candle’s flame, blain Jon for his death and encouraging Jon to take his own life.  Jon freaks out.  Jon’s foster sister asks him if he’s stoned but otherwise, doesn’t seem to be too concerned about Jon’s suicidal tendences.

Jon’s subsequent attempt at suicide fails but it does lead to a both a huge fire and Jon getting sent to yet another foster family.  Feeling lost and alienated and struggling to fit in with his religious community, Jon soon starts spending all of his time in the woods.  Eventually, he meets a Native American girl named Isaka (Alexandra Sertik).  At first, Jon fears that Isaka might be another demon sent to destroy him.  Pastor Mark (Dean Cain) puts his mind at ease.

Jon is soon convinced that he’s in love with Isaka.  He tells everyone about his new girlfriend and no one believes him.  (That said, they’re rather tolerant of someone who claims to be spending all of his time with someone who they say doesn’t exist.)  Jon starts to wonder why he never sees Isaka outside of the woods.  Why has he never met Isaka’s parents?  Why is Isaka always wearing the same clothes?  Why does every picture that he takes of Isaka fail to develop?  You can probably guess why.  Isaka has a tragic story of her own and a lesson to teach Jon.

Forgiving God is a faith-based film that has a lot in common with the horror genre, from the Ouija-dominated opening to Jon’s fear that Isaka might be an otherworldly being sent to lead him astray.  It’s actually a fairly intriguing story and, compared to most faith-based films, it’s actually told pretty well.  Yes, there’s a few moments of awkward humor (faith-based films always seem to have at least one scene of awkward adult-teen dialogue) and some of the performance feel more professional than others.  (Dean Cain, it must be said, classes up the joint in his small role.)  There’s a sequence set at “bible camp,” which really made me happy that, when I was growing up, my family never stayed long enough in one place for anyone to suggest that my sisters and I should go to camp.  That said, the cinematography is impressive, Matthew Utley gives a good performance as Jon, and there’s a fairly effective scene involving a grizzly bear.  As far as indie religious films go, Forgiving God isn’t that bad at all.  If anything, it continues Pennsylvania’s tradition of giving us independent cinema.  George Romero gave us zombies.  This film gives us bears and mysterious forest girls.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell 1.2 “The Lisa Card”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime and Tubi!

This week, an important lesson is learned about credit cards.

Episode 1.2 “The Lisa Card”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on August 28th, 1989)

Lisa’s father (Henry Brown) has given her his credit card and Lisa has charged way too much money on it!  Now, she has to figure out how to raise the money to pay it off before he finds out.

I could relate to this episode.  When I got my first credit card, I went crazy charging stuff to it.  I’m still probably a little bit too quick to reach for it.  To be honest, it wouldn’t be until I was 25 that I really came to understand that someone actually has to pay all that money back.  I knew what Lisa was going through but I was still surprised at how all of her friends immediately came to her aid.  What selfless friends!  I can honestly say that, if a friend of mine needed that much money, I would probably not give it to them.  Lisa got a job at the Max but Slater, Zach, Kelly, Jessie, and Screech ended up doing most of the work and they all did it for free.  Maybe if they had all gotten a job at the Max (as opposed to just volunteering to help) they could have combined their paychecks and paid off that credit card.  Zach also sells all of Lisa’s clothing, holding a sale in the middle of the school hallways.  (“Closing them!” Zach shouts whenever Belding is nearby.)  “Who wants this lingerie?” Zach asks.  Screech pledges his life savings.  Ummm, Lisa is like fourteen and Screech appears to be considerably younger.  That’s kind of icky….

This episode was …. well, I was going to say it was dumb but every episode of Saved By The Bell is dumb.  That said, it was dumb in a fun way.  Lark Voorhees was always underused on Good Morning Miss Bliss but she really goes all out with this episode.  Her nervous twitching when she learned all of her clothes had been given to charity (for free!) was something else to which I could relate.

In the end, Lisa’s father forgives her and Lisa gets upset because he’s not angrier.  What?  Lisa, you got away with it!  Be happy!

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 10/19/25 — 10/25/25


Abbott Elementary (ABC, Wednesday Night)

Gregory throws a terrible party at his apartment.  Mr. Johnson, Barbara, Melissa, and Ava go to the DMV to get their Real IDs.  It’s been a while since I’ve laughed at hard at any show as I did while watching this week’s episode of Abbott.  Even the things that I was previously getting tired of — like Gregory being socially awkward — once again made me laugh.  Abbott Elementary occasionally gets a bit preachy for my tastes but when it work, it’s truly special.

By the way, in Texas, they just give you a Real ID when you renew your driver’s license.  It’s pretty simple.  I don’t know why the states up north decided to make it complicated for everyone.

Hell’s Kitchen (Thursday Night, FOX)

Poor Bradley.  Chef Ramsay even gave him a pep talk and it still didn’t make him a better chef.

It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown (Apple TV)

On Thursday night, Erin and I did our annual viewing of this classic holiday special.  You can read Erin’s thoughts here.  Poor Charlie Brown.  “I got a rock!”

Law & Order (Thursday Night, NBC)

This week, a murderer claimed diplomatic immunity.  The White House demanded that the DA drop the charges because it had a weapons deal with the UAE.  Maroun was not present and was not missed.  Price and Baxter spent the entire episode giving each other strained looks of sympathy.  Both Price and Baxter are such boring characters that I sometimes struggled to remember which is which.  Hugh Dancy and Tony Goldwyn are both totally wasted by this show.

Night Flight (Night Flight+)

On Friday, I watched a “video profile” of musician Annie Lennox.  The music was great.

Rogue’s Gallery (Night Flight+)

On Friday night, I watched a documentary on Al Capone.  Now that’s crime with style!

Special Forces: World’s Toughest Test (Thursday Night, FOX)

Much as with last week, I found myself wondering why anyone not in the Army would put up with being yelled at for 24 hours a day.  I would have walked off the set after an hour.

Toy Story of Terror (Disney+)

Erin wrote about Toy Story of Terror here!

The Vanishing Shadow (NightFlight+)

This old timey serial about the battle for possession of an invisibility ray continued.  It was fun in a 1930s sort of way!

Horror On TV: The Dead Don’t Die (dir by Curtis Harrington)


For today’s horror on television, we have a 1975 made-for-television movie called The Dead Don’t Die!

The Dead Don’t Die takes place in Chicago during the 1930s.  George Hamilton is a sailor who comes home just in time to witness his brother being executed for a crime that he swears he didn’t commit.  Hamilton is convinced that his brother was innocent so he decides to launch an investigation of his own.  This eventually leads to Hamilton not only being attacked by dead people but also discovering a plot involving a mysterious voodoo priest!

Featuring atmospheric direction for Curtis Harrington and a witty script by Robert Bloch, The Dead Don’t Die is an enjoyable horror mystery.  Along with George Hamilton, the cast includes such luminaries of “old” Hollywood as Ray Milland, Ralph Meeker, Reggie Nalder, and Joan Blondell.  (Admittedly, George Hamilton is not the most convincing sailor to ever appear in a movie but even his miscasting seems to work in a strange way.)

And you can watch it below!

Enjoy!