A Movie A Day #118: Navy SEALs (1990, directed by Lewis Teague)

Posted on May 5, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

While rescuing hostages in the Middle East, a team of Navy SEALs discover that terrorist leader Ben Shaheed (Nicholas Kadi) has a warehouse full of stinger missiles. Hawkins (Charlie Sheen) wants to destroy the missiles but his superior, Curran (Michael Biehn), orders him to concentrate on saving the hostages. As a result, Shaheed has time to move the missiles to another location. With the help of a Lebanese-American journalist (Joanne Whalley-Kilmer) and the CIA, the SEALs must now track down the new location and destroy the missiles before they are used by Shaheed’s organization.

Navy SEALs is mostly memorable for the amount of James Cameron alumni who appear in its cast. The cast not only features The Terminator‘s Michael Biehn and Rick Rossovich but Bill Paxton as well. Of course, the main star is Charlie Sheen, still technically a serious actor at the time, who gives a wide-eyed and histrionic performance that suggests Hawkins may have snorted a little marching powder before reporting for duty. 24‘s Dennis Haysbert plays a SEAL who is engaged to marry Law & Order‘s S. Epatha Merkerson. Haysbert spends so much time planning his wedding and talking about both the importance of both duty and love that the only shocking thing about his role is that he manages to survive half the movie before getting killed. Neither Val Kilmer nor Cary Elwes is in the cast, though it seems like they both should be.

Navy SEALs was a box office bust in 1990 but, after the death of Osama Bin Laden, it experienced a sudden upswing in popularity and even appeared on primetime television a few times. The scene where the SEALs blow off some steam by playing golf is a classic but, otherwise, this is a largely forgettable Top Gun rip off.

A Movie A Day #117: Shadow Hours (2000, directed by Isaac H. Eaton)

Posted on May 4, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Straight from the direct-to-video graveyard comes this journey through the seedy underbelly of Los Angeles. Michael Holloway (Balthazar Getty) used to drink every hour and snort cocaine every night. That was the past. Now, he is clean and sober. Michael is married to Chloe (Rebecca Gayheart) and they have a baby on the way. In desperate need of money to support his family, Michael gets a job working the night shift at a 24-hour gas station. Most of his customers are the scum of the Earth until, one night, Stuart Chappell (Peter Weller) steps into the station. Stuart claims to be a writer and he hires Michael to accompany him on an exploration of the dark side of L.A. They start with strip bars and then eventually move on to fight clubs and BDSM parlors. Everywhere they go, Stuart is recognized but everyone knows him by a different name. Soon, Michael is not only drinking and doing drugs again but he is also the prime suspect in a murder.

Shadow Hours is a dumb but entertaining vision of Los Angeles as Hades. It has loads of atmosphere but it’s all taken from other movies, a hint of Taxi Driver there and a pinch of 8mm here. The film’s main weakness is that it stars Balthazar Getty, who, as an actor, has the least sympathetic screen presence this side of Edward Furlong. Even if Getty was playing a paraplegic veteran who had devoted his life to finding good homes for stray puppies, he would still come across as unlikable. Make him a loser who spend most of the movie lying to his pregnant wife and it is impossible to care what happens to Michael. The film’s main strength is that it also stars Peter Weller, who is pitch perfect as the mysterious Stuart, who might be the Devil. If the whole movie had just been Peter Weller going to bars and fight clubs and hanging out with Lydia Lunch, Shadow Hours would have been a B masterpiece. It’s too bad he had to take an oil heir with him.

A Movie A Day #116: Evocateur: The Morton Downey, Jr. Show (2012, directed by Seth Kramer, Daniel A. Miller, and Jeremy Newberger)

Posted on May 3, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Long before the rise of trash TV, reality television, Jerry Springer, Maury Povich, Fox News, and MSNBC, there was The Morton Downey, Jr. Show. Airing at the end of the 1980s, The Morton Downey, Jr. Show featured its host railing against liberals, vegetarians, communists, feminists, libertarians, animal rights activists, teenagers, and pot smokers. Though the show only lasted for two seasons and ended after a bizarre incident in which Downey faked being the victim of a hate crime, The Morton Downey, Jr. served as a forerunner to the rise of our current toxic political culture.

At least, that is the claim made by Evocateur, a documentary about both the show and the controversial showman who hosted it. Since I was too young to watch the show when it originally aired, it was interesting, for me, to watch the many clips that were featured in this documentary. Downey would chain-smoke and shout, while kicking people off his stage. At one point, Downey literally wrapped himself in an American flag and ordered a guest to kiss his ass. On another show, Downey provoked then-Libertarian presidential candidate Ron Paul into shouting at him to shut up. One of the high points of the documentary comes when guest Roy Innis loses his temper and sends Al Shaprton falling to the floor. The audience would into it, chanting “Mort! Mort! Mort!” in the same way that the audience of The Jerry Spring Show chant “Jerry!” whenever a fight breaks out or a guest takes a spin on a the stripper pole. As way of comparison, a clip of Phil Donahue respectfully interviewing a professional foot model (and promising to let his audience know if maybe they could become a foot model too) is used to illustrate just how different The Morton Downey, Jr. Show was from everything else on the air at the time. It is a stretch to try to connect (as this film attempts to do) The Morton Downey, Jr. Show to the rise of the Tea Party but it is true that both Donald Trump and Morton Downey, Jr. borrowed a page from the same populist playbook.

Through home video footage and candid interviews, the documentary attempts to show how Morton Downey, Jr. went from being the son of a famous Irish crooner and a friend of Ted Kennedy’s to being the forerunner of trash tv. There is a lot of speculation about what motivated Downey, some parts of which are more credible than others. A lot of attention is given to Downey’s relationship with his father and his early attempts to have a musical career of his own. As a singer, Mort was always overshadowed but, as a political provocateur and, later, as an anti-smoking activist, Mort was able to establish an identity of his own. Along with archival footage and talking head clips, Evocateur uses animation to tell a good deal of the story. It’s distracting but that currently seems to be the trendy thing to do when it comes to documentaries.

Despite its flaws, Evocateur is an interesting profile of a man whose influence is still being felt even if he has largely been forgotten.

A Movie A Day #115: Zero Tolerance (1994, directed by Joseph Mehri)

Posted on May 2, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

In Zero Tolerance, Robert Patrick plays Jeff Douglas, an FBI agent who is sent down to Mexico to pick up a recently captured drug dealer. Ray Manta (Titus Welliver) is the head of the White Hand drug cartel and he is not happy about having been arrested. When Ray tells Jeff that his entire family is being held hostage and will be killed unless Ray is allowed to escape, Jeff demands that Ray give him his word that no harm will come to his wife and children. Ray gives his “word of honor,” not realizing that his associates have already killed Jeff’s family. Jeff is now out for revenge and he is not going to let the FBI, with its rules and procedures, stand in his way. Jeff is not only out to get Ray. He is also going to track down and kill every member of the White Hand, which includes everyone from Mick Fleetwood (yes, that Mick Fleetwood) to Jeffrey Anderson-Gunter (playing almost exactly the same role that he played in Marked for Death and Only The Strong) to Ator the Invincible himself, Miles O’Keeffe.

(How much keeffe is in this movie? Miles O’Keeffe! Ha ha, that never gets old!)

Robert Patrick is one of those actors who can make any movie worth watching and Zero Tolerance, an otherwise forgettable revenge flick, is proof of that. No one plays a revenge seeking killing machine with as much panache as Robert Patrick. After his family is killed, Patrick crosses the country, stopping everywhere from New Orleans and Las Vegas and seeing vengeance with a determination that almost makes Charles Bronson and Clint Eastwood seem mellow by comparison. This is the type of movie where Robert Patrick literally drives his car through the side of a helicopter and, even after the helicopter explodes, still emerges unscathed.

There’s only one man who could pull that off.

Robert Patrick.

A Movie A Day #114: Scavenger Hunt (1979, directed by Michael Schultz)

Posted on May 1, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

When game designer Milton Parker (Vincent Price) dies, all of his greedy relatives and his servants gather for the reading of his will. Parker’s lawyer, Benstein (Robert Morley), explains that Parker is leaving behind a $200 million dollar estate to whoever can win an elaborate scavenger hunt. Dividing into five teams, the beneficiaries head out to track down as many items as they can by five o’clock that evening. Among the items that they have to find: a toilet, a cash register, an ostrich, a microscope, and an obese person. Hardy har har.

The five teams are made up of a who’s who of sitcom and television actors who had time to kill in 1979. The Odd Couple‘s Tony Randall is Henry Motely, who is Parker’s son-in-law and who works with his four children. Soap‘s Richard Mulligan plays a blue-collar taxi driver named Marvin Dummitz (because funny names are funny) who teams up with his friend, Merle (Stephen Furst). The Mary Tyler Moore Show‘s Cloris Leachman (an Oscar winner, no less) gets stuck with the role of Milton’s greedy sister, Mildred. She works with her conniving lawyer (Richard Benjamin) and her stupid son (Richard Masur). Maureen Teefy plays Milton’s niece while his nephews are played by Willie Aames and Dirk Benedict. Cleavon Little, James Coco, Roddy McDowall, and Stephanie Faracy play the servants.

It doesn’t stop there, though. Avery Schreiber plays a zookeeper. Meat Loaf plays a biker who beats up Richard Benjamin. Ruth Gordon, Stuart Pankin, Pat McCormick, and Scatman Crothers all have cameos. Even Arnold Schwarzenegger makes an appearance as a gym instructor who knocks Tony Randall out of a second story window.

There are a lot of famous people in Scavenger Hunt. It’s just too bad that the movie itself is barely watchable and not at all funny. It tries to go for the zaniness of It’s A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World but, unless watching Willie Aames steal a clown head from Jack in the Box is your idea of hilarity, the film never comes close to succeeding. Michael Schultz directed some classic films (like Car Wash) during the 1970s but, unfortunately, he also directed Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band and this.

Scavenger Hunt used to show up on a late night television, where it was always advertised as starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. (He barely has five minutes of screentime.) It was released on DVD/Blu-ray earlier this year but watching for the cameos is the only reason to take part in this Scavenger Hunt.

A Movie A Day #113: Mother Night (1996, directed by Keith Gordon)

Posted on April 30, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Four years after she played the mysterious (and dead) Laura Palmer in Twin Peaks, Sheryl Lee starred as another mysterious (and possibly dead) woman in Mother Night.

Lee is cast as Helga Noth, the German wife of American expatriate Harold W. Campbell (Nick Nolte). Harold is a playwright, living in Berlin and doing propaganda broadcasts for the Nazis. Working with Frank Wirtanen (John Goodman), a military intelligence officer, Campbell has developed a series of verbal tics that are meant to secretly deliver information to the Allied Forces. It is never clear whether Harold’s information serves any real purpose just as it is left ambiguous as to whether Harold believes any of the anti-Semitic propaganda that he broadcasts over the airwaves. Working as both a propagandist and a double agent, Harold serves both the Allies and the Axis.

In the final days of the war, Helga is reportedly killed on the Eastern Front and Harold is captured by the Americans. Frank arranges for Harold to be quietly sent to New York City but tells him that the government will never admit that they used him as a double agent.

Harold spends the next fifteen years living an isolated life in New York. His only friend is an elderly painter, Kraft (Alan Arkin), with whom he plays chess. Eventually, Harold opens up to the painter and talks about his past. Kraft, for his own shady reasons, reveals Harold’s identity to a group of neo-Nazis. Though Harold initially wants nothing to do with them, this changes when they reveal that they have Helga.

Or do they? Almost no one in Mother Night is who they claim or what they seem to be, especially not Harold.

Based on a novel by Kurt Vonnegut, Mother Night suffers from the same uneven quality that seems to afflict most films based on Vonnegut’s work. It is easy to go overboard when it comes to bringing Vonnegut’s unique mix of drama and satire to the screen and Mother Night does that in a few scenes, especially once Harold reaches New York. It is still an intriguing and thought-provoking film, though. Nick Nolte gives one of his best performances as Harold and Sheryl Lee does a good job in a difficult role.

The pinnacle of Vonnegut films remains George Roy Hill’s version of Slaughterhouse-Five but Mother Night is still superior to something like Alan Rudolph’s adaptation of Breakfast of Champions.

A Movie A Day #112: The Trial (1993, directed by David Jones)

Posted on April 29, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

One morning, in turn of the century Prague, Josef K. (Kyle MacLachlan) wakes up to discover that two detectives are in his room. They tell him that he is under arrest but they do not tell him the charges. Josef remains free to go about his everyday life but he must report to the court whenever the court deems to see him. No matter where Josef turns or who he talks to, he cannot get any answers concerning what he has been charged with. Even his disinterested attorney (Jason Robards) can not give him a straight answer on why he is being prosecuted. No matter how much Josef protests that he is innocent of whatever has been accused of, his fate has already been decided.

On paper, this film version of Franz Kafka’s classic novel sound like it should be a masterpiece. The film was shot on location in Prague, the script was written by Harold Pinter, and Kyle MacLachlan seems like the perfect choice for Josef K. Unfortunately, director David Jones takes a very straightforward approach to the material and does not exploit the story’s nightmarish qualities. This is a version of Kafka that could easily play on Masterpiece Theater. (The perfect choice to direct The Trial would have been MacLachlan’s frequent director, David Lynch.) MacLachlan does well as Josef K. but he is overshadowed by a steady and distracting stream of cameos from actors like Anthony Hopkins, Alfred Molina, and David Thewlis.

Despite not being totally faithful to its source material, Orson Welles’s 1962 adaptation, which stars Anthony Perkins as Josef K., remains the version to see.

TV Review: Twin Peaks 2.20 “The Path to the Black Lodge” (directed by Stephen Gyllenhaal)

Posted on April 29, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Welcome back to Twin Peaks!

Our latest episode begins with a closeup of Rusty Tomasky’s (Ted Raimi) face as the members of the Twin Peaks police force struggle to get the giant paper mache chess piece out of the gazebo. While this goes on, one of Rusty’s friends talks to Andy (Harry Goaz), Cooper (Kyle MacLachlan) and Harry (Michael Ontkean). Rusty was in a band and was supposed to play a gig at Snake River. On the way there, a tire went out on the van and a man emerged from the woods, wanting to know if Rusty wanted some “brew.” Rusty’s friend starts to cry, which makes Andy cry.

Cooper says that Windom has taken another pawn but he did not tell them his next move. “Windom Earle is playing off the board.”

The next morning, at the sheriff’s station, Lucy (Kimmy Robertson) asks Andy what he knows about saving the planet. Andy says that styrofoam never dies and people need to stop tossing their beer cans into Pearl Lake. Lucy says that tomorrow will be D-Day, “Dad day.” She will be choosing her baby’s father, either Andy Brennan or Dick Tremayne. She will also be entering the Miss Twin Peaks contest because she and the baby could use the money.

At the Great Northern, Doctor Hayward (Warren Frost) is giving Ben (Richard Beymer) a physical examination. Hayward tells Ben that he believes that Ben is trying to do the right thing but that he needs to stay away from Eileen. Ben says he has no choice. He has to do what his heart commands him to do. Wheeler (Billy Zane) steps into the office. He says that he has been looking for Audrey. Ben says that Audrey should be back any minute but Wheeler does not have a minute. His business partner has been murdered in Brazil.

In the attic of the Hayward house, Donna (Lara Flynn Boyle) looks over her birth certificate and sees that the identity of her father has been left blank. She finds a scrapbook, full of pictures of her parents with Ben.

Audrey (Sherilyn Fenn) returns to the Great Northern, where Deputy Hawk (Michael Horse) is waiting for her. Hawks tells he that Cooper needs to see her at the station, immediately.

In his office, Ben is still talking to Wheeler. Ben is more concerned about Stop Ghostwood than Wheeler’s dead business partner. Wheeler says that he has no choice but to go. Not realizing that Audrey’s back, Wheeler gives Ben a note and asks him to deliver it to her. Wheeler leaves the office.

At the sheriff’s station, Major Briggs (Don S. Davis) has obtained all of the Project Blue Book files dealing with Windom Earle. Briggs plays a video tape of Earle ranting about the Black Lodge. Cooper says that Earle did not come to Twin Peaks to get revenge on him. Instead, he came to Twin Peaks to find the Black Lodge. Now, they just have to figure out how the Black Lodge is connected to the drawing found in the cave.

Little do they know that, through the microphone hidden in the bonsai tree, Windom Earle (Kenneth Welsh) is listening to their conversation. Earle tells Leo (Eric Da Re) that the time has come to invite Major Briggs to a Project Blue Book reunion.

At the diner, an old woman who we have never been seen before is eating cheery pie when her hand starts to shake so uncontrollably that she has to grab it with her other hand to stop it.

In a booth, Shelly (Madchen Amick) reads her Miss Twin Peaks speech on how to protect the environment to Bobby (Dana Ashbrook). Bobby says that he has been thinking about his relationship with Shelly. Bobby says that he knows he has not been a great boyfriend but, when he saw Shelly kissing Gordon Cole, something in his brain snapped and he realized how much he loved Shelly. They share a passionate kiss that is interrupted by a phone call from Cooper.

At the Roadhouse, preparations are being made for the Miss Twin Peaks Contest. Mayor Milford (John Boylan) tells Lana (Robyn Lively) that the other two judges are going to be Norma Jennings and Richard Tremayne. The Mayor says that all they have to do to win is get Lana alone in a room with Richard. He tells her to wear “a dress slit all the way to Seattle.” The Mayor then starts to cry, wishing that they could just elope. Lana says that she will only marry him if she wins Miss Twin Peaks.

At the station, Cooper tells Audrey, Shelly, and Donna that all three of them are in danger. He orders them to check in with the sheriff at least twice a day and to never go anywhere alone.

At the cabin, Windom is talking about blood-drinking priests while Leo cleans up. Leo sees a picture of Shelly’s face glued to a playing card. Windom says that if Shelly wins Miss Twin Peaks, she will die. He says that Leo can help if he wants. “No!” Leo says before trying to attack Windom with the zapper, which does not work because, even though Leo has managed to grabbed the zapper, he is still the one wearing the electric collar. Leo ends up zapping himself.

Audrey returns to the Great Northern, walking through the lobby and barely missing Wheeler, who is checking out. Audrey goes to Ben’s office, when Ben welcomes her back and then tells her that the Stop Ghostwood Campaign needs a spokesperson. Ben wants her to enter Miss Twin Peaks. Audrey wants to know where Wheeler is. Ben finally tells her that Wheeler had to leave for the Brazilian rain forest and tries to give the letter to Audrey. Audrey leaves, hoping to catch Wheeler at the airport.

At the sheriff’s station, Cooper, Harry, and Andy are examining the cave drawing. Cooper says that the symbols suggest a time but a time for what? Cooper admits that he is having a hard time focusing because he can not stop thinking about Annie. Suddenly, Cooper’s hand starts to shake until he grabs it with his other hand.

Major Briggs is walking through the woods when he is approached by Windom Earle and Leo, who are wearing a horse costume. “Hello, Wilbur!” Earle says before shooting the Major with a tranquilizer dart.

At the airport, Wheeler is getting in his private plane. He stops to take one final look for Audrey.

At the diner, Cooper orders a slice of cheery pie and uses a quote from St. Augustine to encourage Annie (Heather Graham) to enter the Miss Twin Peaks contest. Cooper confesses that he spends most of his time thinking about Annie. Annie says she spends all of her time thinking about Cooper. Cooper asks Annie to go dancing with him and leans in to kiss her. Dishes all of the counter and syrup ominously drips on the floor.

At the airport, Pete (Jack Nance) drives Audrey across the airstrip, letting her off in front of Wheeler’s plane. Audrey runs in front of the taxiing airplane, yelling for Wheeler to stop. Luckily, Wheeler does stop before running her over.

“I’m a virgin!” Audrey says, “I want you to make love to me.”

“Here and now?” Wheeler asks.

“It’s your jet.”

Realizing that Audrey has a point, Wheeler leads her into his plane, while Pete watches from his truck. Pete has tears in his eyes. Suddenly, his hand starts to shake uncontrollably.

At the cabin, Earle interrogates the bound Briggs, shooting arrows at him whenever Briggs says that he is not at liberty to divulge any information. Earle gets annoyed and gives the major a shot of truth serum. Earle asks Briggs what his greatest fear is.

“The possibility that love is not enough,” Briggs says.

(I would have said salmonella but that’s just me.)

Under the influence of the serum, Briggs says that the signs in the cave mean that “there is a time, if Jupiter and Saturn meet, they will receive you.”

At the Martell house, Catherine (Piper Laurie) is showing Eckhardt’s lunar box to Andrew (Dan O’Herlihy). Andrew pushes the buttons the box and it pops open, revealing another box. Andrew smashes that box, revealing yet another box inside.

At the Roadhouse, Annie and Cooper are dancing. Looking at the decorations for the Miss Twin Peaks pageant, Annie tells Cooper that she has decided to enter. Annie says that being Miss Twin Peaks would be like being in a fairy tale. “And you’re the queen,” Cooper says.

Suddenly, time freezes for everyone but Cooper. The lights go down. The Giant (Carel Struycken) appears on the stage, shaking his head “NO.” Cooper looks confused though it should be obvious to him that the Giant is saying, “No, do not enter the contest!”

At the airport, Wheeler’s plane finally takes off. Pete gets out of his truck and is approached by a newly mature Audrey who says that she finally met the man of his dreams and now he is on his way to Brazil. Audrey cries that Wheeler offered to take her fishing but he never did. Pete says he has some tackle in the truck. Pete tells her that the best cure for a broken heart is trout’s leap at midnight.

At the cabin, Leo is shaking and the Major is screaming. Earle is singing about mummy wheat. Earle has figured out that the drawing is actually a map to the Black Lodge.

At the dance, the Giant finally disappears. As Cooper kisses Annie. Mayor Milford tries to get a microphone to work. “Something’s not right,” he says, “there’s something wrong here.”

In the woods, Killer BOB (Frank Silva) emerges from a portal while the red curtains are reflected in a nearby puddle.

With only two episodes left, this was a pretty good episode. All of the disparate plotlines of the latter half of the second season are finally coming together and the appearance of both the Giant and BOB at the end promises that the finale will be a return to the Twin Peaks of old.

Leonard is doing tomorrow’s episode and then Lisa is doing the finale so this is my last recap. I have really enjoyed rewatching Twin Peaks and sharing my thoughts about the show with all of you. Thank you for reading!

Previous Entries in The TSL’s Look At Twin Peaks:

A Movie A Day #111: I’m Dangerous Tonight (1990, directed by Tobe Hooper)

Posted on April 28, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Sweet and repressed Amy (Madchen Amick) is a college student who has too much on her plate. She has to take care of her greedy grandmother (Natalie Schaefer, of Gilligan’s Island fame). She has to read a book for her study partner (Corey Parker). She has to sew a dress for her older sister, Gloria (Daisy Hall). She has to find props for the school play. It is her search for props that leads to her buying an old chest at an estate sale. Inside the chest is a red cloak. Amy turns the red cloak into a dress but what she does not know is that the red cloak was previously won by Aztec priests while they conducted human sacrifices. As Professor Buchanan (Anthony Perkins) later explains, anyone who wears the dress will be driven to do evil.

Like Hitler’s Daughter and Deadly Game, I’m Dangerous Tonight was a USA original film. Like those two films, and despite the combined talents of the star of Psycho and the director of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, I’m Dangerous Tonight is not very good. Perkins is mostly just used for exposition while Hooper’s direction suggests that his main concern was picking up his paycheck. I’m Dangerous Tonight will be best appreciated by fans of Madchen Amick. Amick is not only beautiful here but she also plays a character far different from Twin Peaks’s Shelly Johnson.

Also, be sure to keep an eye out for R. Lee Ermey, playing a tough, cigar-chomping police detective as only he can.

Movie a Day #110: Femme Fatale (1991, directed by Andre R. Guttfreund)

Posted on April 27, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Joseph Price (Colin Firth) was once a painter but now he is the world’s least likely park ranger. One day, he meets the beautiful and mysterious Cynthia (Lisa Zane). Within days, Joe and Cynthia are married but one morning, Joe wakes up to discover that Cynthia is gone and she has only left behind a brief note. Searching for his wife, Joe goes to Los Angeles and discovers how little he knew about Cynthia. Joe’s search eventually leads him into the world of porn, drugs, S&M, and performance art.

This month, every entry in Movie A Day has had a least one Twin Peaks connection. Femme Fatale has two. Joe’s best friend, a laid back artist who is usually seen painting a topless woman who sometimes wears a brown bag over her head, is played by Billy Zane, who appeared as John Justice Wheeler during the second season of Twin Peaks. Also, Catherine Coulson (the show’s famous Log Lady) appears as a nun who provides an important clue to Cynthia’s past.

Femme Fatale used to show up on HBO in the 1990s and it is currently on YouTube. It may not be a great film but it does have a good cast. Along with Billy Zane and Coulson, Femme Fatale also features Scott Wilson as a shady psychologist, Lisa Blount as an actress who used to work with Cynthia, and Pat Skipper and John Lavachielli as two talkative thugs named Ed and Ted. Both Carmine Caridi and the great Danny Trejo show up in small roles. It may seem strange to cast the very British Colin Firth as a park ranger but it works. As for Lisa Zane, who is Billy’s older sister, Cynthia was probably her best role.

Predictable though the movie may be, Femme Fatale is enjoyably stupid if you are in the right mood. There should always be a time and place for the old neo noirs of 1990s.