Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Friday the 13th 1.14 “Bedazzled”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!

This week’s episode of Friday the 13th is …. well, it’s not that good.  Let’s talk about it.

Episode 1.14 “Bedazzled”

(Dir by Alexander Singer, originally aired on February 22nd, 1988)

With Jack and Ryan out of town to attend an astrology convention, Micki has got the antique store to herself …. or, at least, she does until she agrees to babysit a bratty kid named Richie (Gavan Magrath).  Even worse than Richie are Jonah (Alan Jordan) and Tom (David Mucci), who claim to be telephone repairmen but who are actually at the store because they want to retrieve a cursed lantern that was taken from them by Jack and Ryan.

(Incidentally, they kill the real telephone repairman before showing up at the store.  The real repairman is played Timothy Webber, who played Mo in Terror Train.  Meanwhile, Dave Mucci played Wendy’s thuggish boyfriend in Prom Night.  So, if nothing else, this episode is a footnote of sorts in Canadian slasher history.)

The cursed lantern is probably the lamest antique that the show has featured up to this point.  Using the lantern, undersea divers can find hidden treasure.  But after finding treasure, the lantern then has to set someone on fire.  (Basically, after hidden treasure is found, anyone who is touched by a beam of the lantern’s light will burst into flames.)  The man problem is that the lantern is so big and bulky that Jonah just looks silly whenever he picks it up and aims the lantern’s fiery light at anyone.  It is a seriously awkward and rather impractical weapon, one that appears to not only be impossible to aim but also next to impossible to run with as well.  Add to that, it turns out that the beam of light can diverted by a mirror so it’s not only a lame item but an easily defeated one as well.

It’s a shame that this episode isn’t better.  Micki may have the best hair and the best fashion sense of anyone on the show but it’s rare that she ever really gets an episode all to herself.  But this episode saddles her down not only with forgettable villains and an impractical cursed item but it also forces her to deal with a bratty kid.  The kid survives his night at store and, by all logic, he should be traumatized for life.  Instead, he tells his mother about everything that happened and his mother laughs about what a great imagination he has.  Seriously, though, shouldn’t Micki have some magic wand that she could use to erase Richie’s memory or something?  It seems kind of dangerous to let a kid that bratty know that the store is full of magic items.

Anyway, this was a forgettable episode so I’m keeping the review short tonight!  Fortunately, next week’s episode will be much better.

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 2.12 “Wendell’s Story”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990.  The show can be found on Tubi!

T.S. Turner protects a man who finds some money!  Didn’t he already do this?

Episode 2.12 “Wendell’s Story”

(Dir by Don McCutcheon, originally aired on January 30th, 1990)

Who is Wendell?

Wendell (played by Wayne Robson) is beloved figured in this show’s fictional Canadian city.  Wendell lives on the streets, sleeping in a tent in an alley and spendinh his days eating whatever food he happens to come across.  Wendell is good-natured and he doesn’t take it personally when the local teenagers toss a half-eaten apple at him.  Wendell is such a nice guy that, when he comes across a duffel bag full of money, he doesn’t keep the money for himself but he instead starts handing it out to random people.  It’s his way of thanking everyone for helping him and everyone is very polite about waiting their turn to be handed some money.

Way to go, Wendell!

Unfortunately, the duffel bag belonged to two incompetent crooks named Errol (Gareth Bennett) and Fritz (Dominic Cuzzocrea).  Now, when I say incompetent …. listen, T and T has featured it’s share of dumb criminals but there have never been any dumb as these two.  Not only do they lose the duffel bag but they also continually lose track of Wendell.  They’re the type of crooks whose ammo clips regularly fall out of the guns.  These guys may be incompetent but they do fire a gun at T.S. at one point.  T.S. escapes injury but, as he explains to Amy, shooting at him makes things “personal.”

T.S.’s plan to protect Wendell and catch the bad guys is to have his friend Decker wear a fake beard and pretend to be Wendell.  It’s a good plan, except the bad guys come up with a similar plan and, as a result, there are two fake Wendells wandering around and T.S. has to figure out which one to beat up.  T.S. gets so confused that it gives the bad guys time to to get the drop on him.  Fortunately, the bad guys once again fail to load their guns correctly, which gives T.S. and Decker time to knock them both out with one punch.

This was not a particularly complicated episode.  Nor was it a very suspenseful one, as the bad guys were such idiots that they never came across as being any sort of threat.  More time was spent with Wendell teaching Joe how to live on the streets than on the villains trying to get their money back.  (Why is Wendell teaching Joe how to live on the streets?  It was T.S.’s idea, which leads me to wonder if T.S. is planning on kicking Joe out of the gym at some point in the near future.)  As for Amy, she spent most of this episode setting up her new office and getting annoyed with the perfectly nice guy who had an office across the hall.  The show may be called T and T but it’s usually one T who gets to do anything.

This was a bit of a forgettable episode but Mr. T did yell, “Hey, fool!” after the bad guys attempted to shoot him so that was kind of fun.

 

Here Are The 2023 Nominations of the American Society of Cinematographers


Yesterday, the American Society of Cinematographers announced their nominations for the best of 2023.  The winners will be announced on March 3rd.

Feature
Edward Lachmann, ASC for “El Conde” (Netflix)
Matthew Libatique, ASC, LPS for “Maestro” (Netflix)
Rodrigo Prieto, ASC, AMC for “Killers of the Flower Moon” (Apple TV+)
Robbie Ryan, ISC for “Poor Things” (Searchlight)
Hoyt van Hoytema, ASC, FSF, NSC for “Oppenheimer” (Universal Pictures)

Spotlight
Eric Branco for “Story Ave.” (Kino Lorber)
Krum Rodriguez for “Citizen Saint”
Warwick Thornton for “The New Boy”

Documentary
Jeff Hutchens for “Murder in Big Horn”, Episode 1
Curren Sheldon for “King Coal”
D. Smith for “Kokomo City”

Limited or Anthology Series or Motion Picture Made for Television
Dan Atherton for “Great Expectations” – “The Three Keys” (FX)
Sam Chiplin for “The Lost Flowers of Alice Hart” – “Part One: BLack Fire Orchid” (Prime Video)
Ben Kutchins, ASC for “Boston Strangler” (Hulu)
Igot Martinovic for “George & Tammy” – “Stand by Your Man” (Showtime)
Jason Oldak for “Lessons in Chemistry” – “Book of Calvin” (Apple TV+)
Tobias Schliessler, ASC for “All The Light We Cannot See” – “Episode 2” (Netflix)

Episode of a One-Hour Regular Series
Ricardo Diaz for “Winning Time: The Rise of the Lakers Dynasty” – “The Second Coming” (Max)
Rob C. Givens for “Gotham Knights” – “Daddy Issues” (CW)
M. David Mullen, ASC for “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” – “Four Minutes” (Prime Video)
Cathal Watters, ASC, ISC for “Foundation” – “In Seldon’s Shadow” (Apple TV+)
Glen Keenan for “Star Trek: Strange New Worlds” – “Hegemony” (Paramount+)

Episode of a Half-Hour Television Series
Julian Court, BSC for “The Diplomat” – “The James Bond Clause” (Netflix)
Carl Herse for “Barry” – “Tricky Legacies” (Max)
Jon Joffin, ASC for “Schmigadoon!” – “Something Real” (Apple TV+)
Blake McClure, ASC for “Minx” – “I Thought the Bed was Gonna Fly” (Starz)
Andrew Wehde for “The Bear” – “The Bear” (Hulu)

Music Video
Scott Cunningham, ASC for “Gorilla” (performed by Little Simz)
Jon Joffin, ASC for “At Home” (performed by Jon Bryant)
Andrey Nikolaev for “Tanto” (performed by Cassie Marin)

Oppenheimer Wins In Denver!


The Denver Film Critics Society has announced their picks for the best of 2023!  The winners are listed below in bold.

Best Film
Barbie
Killers of the Flower Moon
Oppenheimer
Past Lives
Poor Things

Best Director
Emerald Fennell – Saltburn
Greta Gerwig – Barbie
Yorgos Lanthimos – Poor Things
Christopher Nolan – Oppenheimer
Martin Scorsese – Killers of the Flower Moon

Best Lead Performance by an Actor, Female
Lily Gladstone – Killers of the Flower Moon
Greta Lee – Past Lives
Carey Mulligan – Maestro
Margot Robbie – Barbie
Emma Stone – Poor Things

Best Lead Performance by an Actor, Male
Bradley Cooper – Maestro
Paul Giamatti – The Holdovers
Barry Keoghan – Saltburn
Cillian Murphy – Oppenheimer
Jeffrey Wright – American Fiction

Best Supporting Performance by an Actor, Female
Emily Blunt – Oppenheimer
Danielle Brooks – The Color Purple
Da’Vine Joy Randolph – The Holdovers
Rachel McAdams – Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret
Rosamund Pike – Saltburn

Best Supporting Performance by an Actor, Male
Rober De Niro – Killers of the Flower Moon
Robert Downey Jr. – Oppenheimer
Ryan Gosling – Barbie
Charles Melton – May December
Mark Ruffalo – Poor Things

Best Sci-Fi/Horror
The Creator
Godzilla Minus One
Poor Things
Talk to Me
They Cloned Tyrone

Best Animated Film
The Boy and the Heron
Elemental
Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse
The Super Mario Bros. Movie
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem

Best Comedy
American Fiction
Barbie (TIE)
Bottoms
The Holdovers
Poor Things (TIE)

Best Visual Effects
The Creator (TIE)
Godzilla Minus One
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3 (TIE)
Oppenheimer
Poor Things

Best Original Screenplay
Greta Gerwig & Noah Baunmbach – Barbie
Samy Burch – May December
Emerald Fennell – Saltburn
David Hemingson – The Holdovers
Celine Song – Past Lives

Best Adapted Screenplay
Andrew Haigh – All of Us Strangers
Cord Jefferson – American Fiction
Tony McNamara – Poor Things
Christopher Nolan – Oppenheimer
Eric Roth & Martin Scorsese – Killers of the Flower Moon

Best Documentary Feature
20 Days in Mariupol
American Symphony
Beyond Utopia
Kokomo City
Still: A Michael J. Fox Movie

Best Original Song
Dance the Night – Barbie
I’m Just Ken – Barbie
What Was I Made For – Barbie
Keep It Moving – The Color Purple
Road to Freedom – Rustin
Am I Dreaming – Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

Best Original Score
Jerskin Fendrix – Poor Things
Ludwig Göransson – Oppenheimer
Mica Levi – The Zone of Interest
Daniel Pemberton – Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse
Robbie Robertson – Killers of the Flower Moon

Best Non-English Language Feature
Anatomy of a Fall
Godzilla Minus One (TIE)
Past Lives
The Taste of Things
The Zone of Interest (TIE)

Here Are The 2023 Nominations of the Producers Guild!


The Producers Guild (which is usually a major precursor as far as the Oscar nominees are concerned) have announced their nominations for the best films 0f 2024!

And here they are:

Darryl F. Zanuck Award for Outstanding Producer of Theatrical Motion Pictures
American Fiction
Anatomy Of A Fall
Barbie
The Holdovers
Killers Of The Flower Moon
Maestro
Oppenheimer
Past Lives
Poor Things
The Zone Of Interest

Award for Outstanding Producer of Animated Theatrical Motion Pictures
The Boy And The Heron
Elemental
Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse
The Super Mario Bros. Movie
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem

The Award for Outstanding Producer of Documentary Motion Picture
20 Days in Mariupol
American Symphony
Beyond Utopia
The Disappearance Of Shere Hite
The Mother of All Lies
Smoke Sauna Sisterhood
Squaring The Circle (The Story of Hipgnosis)

There’s not a lot of surprises here, other than perhaps the nomination for Anatomy of a Fall.  Not getting mentioned here (or by SAG or by DGA) is probably the death knell for May December‘s Best Picture campaign.  As well, The Color Purple could have really used a nomination here to build on whatever momentum it got from SAG.

The winners will be announced on February 25th.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Rob Zombie Edition


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films is all about letting the visuals do the talking.

Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy birthday to Rob Zombie!  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Rob Zombie Films

House of 1000 Corpses (2003, dir by Rob Zombie, DP: Alex Poppas and Tom Richmond)

Halloween II (2009, dir by Rob Zombie, DP: Brandon Trost)

The Lords of Salem (2012, dir by Rob Zombie, DP: Brandon Trost)

3 From Hell (2019, dir by Rob Zombie, DP: David N . Daniel)

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Highway To Heaven 1.16


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Highway to Heaven, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, Mark has a near-death experience.

Episode 1.16 “Going Home, Going Home”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on January 23rd, 1985)

While driving through Oklahoma at night, Mark mentions to Jonathan that they are near the location of his grandfather’s old farm.  Jonathan suggests that they stop off to see the farm and see if any of Mark’s old friends are around but Mark explains that he had no friends when he lived with his grandfather.  As Mark puts it, he was sent to live with his grandfather after his mother died and he spent the whole time complaining about how much he would have rather stayed back in California.  Mark says that his greatest regret is that he never told his grandfather that he loved him.

Awwwww!  That’s so sad!

Suddenly, a cow appears in the middle of the road.  Mark swerves to avoid it and the car ends up in a ditch.  Jonathan, being an immortal angel, is not injured.  Mark, however, hits his head on the steering wheel and goes into a coma.  A local farmer rushes Jonathan and Mark to the town doctor.  When Jonathan tells the comatose Mark that it’s not his time to die, the doctor replies that the time of Mark’s death is up to God.

Yikes!

Mark does eventually wake up.  Feeling much better, he goes for a walk around the town with Jonathan.  Mark is surprised to see that the town has not changed at all since he lived there.  The cars are all vintage.  1930s swing music is playing from the radios.  And, on the bridge near the location of his grandfather’s farm, Mark meets a 9 year-old boy (Sean De Veritch) who is reading a copy of Superman #1.  The boy says that his name is Mark Gordon.

Jonathan explains that Mark has not woken up at all.  He’s still in his coma and now, he’s getting a chance to tell his grandfather that he loves him.  But, Jonathan explains, old Mark cannot reveal his true identity so he’ll have to get Young Mark to say the words.  Good luck with that, seeing as Young Mark is obsessed with going back to Oakland.

Soon, Mark and Johnathan are working on the farm and helping Carl Fred Simms (John McLiam), who is also Mark’s grandfather, keep his land from falling into the hands of a greedy land developer.  To the show’s credit, it doesn’t take much for Old Mark to convince Young Mark to start treating his grandfather with more respect.  Old Mark explains that Young Mark will always regret not appreciating his grandfather and that’s all it takes for Young Mark to shape up.  Young Mark even finds a the location of an underground well but, by that point, old Carl is already on the verge of death.

This is one of those extremely sentimental and earnest episodes that are pretty much this show’s trademark.  It’s not subtle but it is extremely sincere and, as a result, it’s hard not to get caught up in the episode’s emotions.  There’s a lot about this episode that would normally bring out my snarky side but everyone seems to be so committed to the story that they’re telling that one has to appreciate their efforts.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Alfonso Arau Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today, we celebrate the birthday of Mexican director and actor Alfonso Arau!  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Alfonso Arau Films

Calzonin Inspector (1973, dir by Alfonso Arau, DP: Jorge Stahl Jr.)

Like Water For Chocolate (1992, dir by Alfonso Arau, DP: Emmanuel Lubezki)

A Walk In The Clouds (1995, dir by Alfonso Arau. DP: Emmanuel Lubezki)

The Trick In The Sheet (2010, dir by Alfonso Arau, DP: Vittorio Storaro)

Catching Up With The Films of 2023: Nyad (Dir by Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi and Jimmy Chin)


64 year-old swimmer Diana Nyad swimming all the way from Cuba to Florida (and making it on her fifth attempt) is one of those inspiring stories that I totally missed when it happened.  I can’t remember for sure exactly what was going on in my life in 2013 but paying attention to inspirational sports stories was apparently not high on the agenda.

Fortunately, any amazing true story will eventually be turned into a film and that film will eventually premiere on Netflix in time for Oscar consideration.  That’s certainly the case with Nyad, which stars Annette Bening as the title character and Jodie Foster as her best friend and coach, Bonnie Stoll.  The film follows Nyad as she spends four years of her life trying to make it from Cuba and Florida and prove the naysayers wrong.  Along the way, she learns about humility, she learns to value her friends, and she also starts to deal with the various traumas of her youth.

It’s not a bad film.  It may sound like a traditional sports biopic and, in many ways, it is.  The directors are documentarians making their feature debut and they do have a tendency to rely a bit too much on archival footage of network news reporters announcing that Nyad will be making another attempt to make the swim.  The film (and the characters) unquestioning love for Cuba can be a bit hard to take, considering that the story takes place at a time when Raoul Castro was still ruling the country.  (The amount of “Visit Cuba” shirts felt more than a little excessive.  Don’t visit Cuba as long as Jose Daniel Ferrer is being detained.)  That said, the cinematography is gorgeous and the film does a wonderful job of showing just how physically and mentally exhausting Nyad’s accomplishment was.  It’s not just that Diana is physically drained from the experience.  She also occasionally suffers hallucinations as a result of exhaustion and exposure and, often times, she’s unaware of how far along she is in her journey.  While Diana swims, Bonnie and the rest of her team steer her, trying to keep her moving with the unpredictable current.  This is a film that will leave you respecting professional swimmers and their support teams.

The film’s cast does a great job bringing the story to life.  As portrayed in the film, Diana Nyad can be a bit of a pain to deal with and, to her credit, Annette Bening doesn’t try to soften any of the character’s rough edges.  Nyad is a egotistical, grandiose, impractical, demanding, and frequently self-centered and it says a lot of about Bening’s performance that the audience still ends up sympathizing with her and her desire to not be dismissed as obsolete at the age of 60.  That said, the film truly belongs to Jodie Foster and Rhys Ifans, playing Nyad’s coach and her navigator.  While Nyad rails against age and insists that her destiny is to successfully make the swim,  it falls to the characters played by Foster and Ifans to just keep Diana alive.  Foster is the film’s heart, playing Bonnie as a tough but caring coach who understands that, even though they drive each other crazy, she and Nyad are meant to make the journey together.  While the film portrays Nyad’s accomplishment, what it truly celebrates is her friendship with Bonnie.  We should all be so lucky to have a friend and supporter like Bonnie in our lives.

It may not break any new cinematic ground but Nyad still does a good job of telling a worthy story.