Here’s The Red Band Trailer For The Suicide Squad


Earlier today, the red band trailer for The Suicide Squad was released!

It’s always kind of funny to me how excited some people get over red band trailers, when essentially red band trailers are just the same as regular trailers.  The main difference is that you get to hear people curse but is that really that exotic?  Red band trailers always remind me of a little kid trying to impress everyone by dropping the f-bomb.  I mean, we all already knew that The Suicide Squad was R-rated, right?  Maybe it’s just that I’ve seen so many Italian horror trailers that everything now seems tame by comparison.  I mean, once you’ve seen the trailer for Zombie Holocaust, it’s hard to be shocked.

Anyway, people with far more knowledge of The Suicide Squad than me are excited about this trailer so I will refrain from being too critical.  I mean, the trailer gets the job done.  If you were excited to see The Suicide Squad, I imagine that you’re still excited.  I think the only recent trailers that actively turned people from seeing a films that they might otherwise see were the trailers for Ghostsbusters and Cats.

Myself, I’m just looking forward to seeing what James Gunn does with the material.

Anyway, here’s the trailer!

The Unnominated: Auto Focus (dir by Paul Schrader)


Though the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences claim that the Oscars honor the best of the year, we all know that there are always worthy films and performances that end up getting overlooked.  Sometimes, it’s because the competition too fierce.  Sometimes, it’s because the film itself was too controversial.  Often, it’s just a case of a film’s quality not being fully recognized until years after its initial released.  This series of reviews takes a look at the films and performances that should have been nominated but were,for whatever reason, overlooked.  These are the Unnominated.

The 2002 film Auto Focus start out as almost breezy satire of the perfect all-American life and it ends with an act of shocking violence.  It’s based on a real-life mystery, a murder that revealed a secret life.

When we first see Bob Crane (Greg Kinnear), he’s a disc jockey and a drummer living in the suburbs of Los Angeles in the mid-60s.  He’s got what would appear to be the ideal life.  He’s got a nice house.  He and his wife (Rita Wilson) seem to be devoted to each other.  His children are adorable.  He goes to church.  He tells corny Dad jokes.  He’s got a quick smile and a friendly manner and it’s impossible not to like him.  When he gets offered the lead in a sitcom, his happiness and enthusiasm feels so generous that it’s impossible not to be happy for him.

Of course, the show is a comedy that takes place in World War II POW camp, which doesn’t really sound like a surefire hit or really anything that should be put on the air.  (“Funny Nazis?” Crane says in disbelief when he’s first told about the project.)  Still, with Crane in the lead role, Hogan’s Heroes becomes a hit and, for a while, Bob Crane becomes a star and it seems like it couldn’t have happened to a more deserving guy.

The problem, of course, is that Crane seems like he’s too good to be true and we all know what they say about things like that.  From the start, there are hints that Crane may be hiding another side of his personality.  His wife, for instance, is not happy when she discovers his stash of pornographic magazines in their garage.  (“They’re photography magazines!” Crane protests with a smile that’s a bit too quick.)  Crane obviously enjoys the recognition that comes from being the star of a top-rated show.  He starts hanging out at strip clubs, occasionally playing drums with the club’s band and watching the dancers with a leer that’s really not all that different from the smile that he flashes whenever he asks anyone if they want an autograph.

Crane also meets John Carpenter (Willem DaFoe), an electronics expert who introduces him to the then-expensive and exclusive world of home video.  As opposed to the clean-cut and smoothly-spoken Crane, Carpenter is so awkward that it’s sometimes painful to watch him move or listen to him speak.  He’s the epitome of the Hollywood hanger-on, the type who has deluded himself into thinking that his celebrity clients genuinely like him and enjoy his company.  He and Crane become fast friends, though it’s always obvious that Crane considers himself to be better than Carpenter.  However, Carpenter is the only person with whom Crane can share the details of his secret life.

The film covers several years, from the late 60s to the mid-70s.  Crane goes from being so clean-cut that he neither drinks nor curses to being so addicted to sex that he can stop himself even when it starts to destroy his career and leads to him losing everything that he loves.  Carpenter and Crane’s friendship becomes progressively more and more self-destructive until the film ends in violence and tragedy.

Auto Focus begins on a light and breezy note but, as Crane’s addiction grows, the film grows darker.  By the time the movie enters the 70s, the camerawork becomes more jittery and the once soft-spoken Crane seems to be drowning in his own anxiety.  He becomes the type who causally goes from talking to Carpenter about how he wants to direct the world’s greatest sex film to cheerfully announcing that Disney has decided to cast him in a film called SuperDad.  Auto Focus‘s key scene comes towards the end, when Crane is a guest on a silly cooking show and shocks the audience by harassing a woman sitting in the front row.  When the audience boos, Crane flashes his familiar smile and it becomes obvious just how much of Crane’s life has been spent hiding behind that smile.  By the end of the film, not even Crane himself can keep track of whether or not he’s a wholesome comedy star or a self-destructive sex addict.

Both Greg Kinnear and Willem DaFoe gave Oscar-worthy performance in Auto Focus, performances that hold your interest even after their characters sink to some truly low depths.  The film makes good use of Kinnear’s amiable screen presence and Kinnear convincingly creates a man who wishes that he could be the person that he’s fooled everyone into thinking that he is.  By the time he’s reduced to begging his agent (well-played by Ron Leibman) to find him a game show so that he can finally stop doing dinner theater, it’s hard not to have a little sympathy for him, even if the majority of his problems are self-created.  As Carpenter, DaFoe is convincingly creepy but, at times, he’s also so pathetic that, again, you can’t help but feel a little sorry for him.  At his worst, Carpenter is the 70s equivalent of the twitter user who stans a celebrity by sending them adoring tweets and then picking fights with anyone who disagrees.

Unfortunately, the Academy nominated neither Kinnear for Best Actor nor DaFoe for Best Supporting Actor.  The competition for Best Actor was fierce that year, with Nicolas Cage, Michael Caine, Daniel Day-Lewis, and Jack Nicholson all losing to Adrien Brody in The Pianist.  While Kinnear deserved a nomination, it’s hard to say who I would drop from that line-up to make room for him.  As for DaFoe, I would argue that he was more deserving of a supporting actor nomination than The Hours‘s Ed Harris or The Road To Perdition’s Paul Newman.  Perhaps DaFoe was just too convincing as the type of clingy groupie that most members of the Academy probably dread having to deal with.

Nominated or not, Auto Focus is a disturbing and ultimately sad look at the darkness that often hides behind a perfect facade.

 

The Producers Guild Honors Nomadland


The Producers Guild announced its picks for the best of 2020-2021 last night and, not surprisingly, the winner for Best Film was Nomadland.  Nomadland now pretty much how a clear road to winning the Academy Award for Best Picture at the end of April.  I have to admit that I have yet to see it, even though I’ve got Hulu.  I don’t know …. I just can’t work up any enthusiasm for the prospect of sitting through it.

Anyway, here are the PGA’s winners:

The Award for Outstanding Producer of a Feature Theatrical Motion Picture
Borat Subsequent Moviefilm
Judas and the Black Messiah
Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom
Mank
Minari
Nomadland
One Night in Miami
Promising Young Woman
Sound of Metal
The Trial of the Chicago 7

The Award for Outstanding Producer of Animated Theatrical Motion Pictures
The Croods: A New Age
Onward
Over the Moon
Soul
Wolfwalkers
 
The Award for Outstanding Producer of Documentary Motion Pictures 
David Attenborough: A Life on Our Planet
Dick Johnson Is Dead
My Octopus Teacher
Softie
A Thousand Cuts
Time
The Truffle Hunters

Spring Breakdown: Eureka (dir by Nicolas Roeg)


 

In this 1983 film, Gene Hackman plays Jack McCann, a prospector who is determined to either get rich or freeze to death as he wanders around Alaska in the 1920s.  When he’s not having sex and philosophical discussions with the local witch, Freida (Helena Kallianiotes), Jack desperately searches for gold.  Jack is convinced that gold is all that he needs to be happy, though Freida counsels him that it’s also important to pursue more Earthly delights.  Everywhere Jack looks, he sees people dying in the snow.  In fact, Jack nearly dies himself until he stumbles across a mountain full of gold.  As gold dust pours down on him, he celebrates while having flashbacks to Freida writhing in ecstasy.  It’s just that type of film.  When Jack tells Freida about his claim, he asks what’s going to happen next.  Freida tells him that it’s both the end and the beginning.  Once again, it’s just that type of film.

At this point, Eureka jumps ahead 20 years.  The year is 1945.  World War II is coming to an end.  Jack is no longer freezing and starving to death in Alaska.  Now, he is one of the world’s richest men.  He even owns his own island in the Caribbean.  Jack has a huge house, a beautiful view of the ocean, and all the money in the world.  One could even say that his life has become an exclusive beach vacation, an eternal Spring Break, if you will.  And yet, even with all of his money, Jack has fallen victim to ennui.  He was happier when he was poor and starving and seeking warmth from Freida.  Now, he’s got an alcoholic wife (Jane LaPotaire) and his daughter, Tracy (Theresa Russell), is in love with a dissolute aristocrat named Claude (Rutger Hauer), to whom Jack takes an instant dislike.  Claude claims that Jack has stolen his wealth from the Earth.  Claude is the type who eats gold and then promises to return it to Jack as soon as he can.  That’s something that actually happens.  It’s kind of silly but Rutger Hauer is such a charmer that he nearly pulls it off.

Claude and Tracy aren’t the only thing that Jack has to worry about.  An American gangster named Mayakofsky (Joe Pesci) wants to take over Jack’s island so that he can build a casino on it.  However, despite the best efforts of Mayakofsky’s attorney (Mickey Rourke), Jack is still not willing to sell.  When hitman Joe Spinell shows up outside the estate, are Jack’s days of ennui numbered?

Of course, they are!  That’s not really a spoiler.  Eureka is (loosely) based on the real-life murder of Sir Harry Oakes, an American-born prospector who was thought to be one of the world’s richest men when he was brutally murdered in the 40s.  Jack is, of course, a stand-in for Oakes while Mayakofsky is based on Meyer Lansky, the mobster who many people suspect ordered Oakes’s murder.  Lansky was never charged with the crime.  Instead, Oakes’s son-in-law, Count Alfred de Marigny, was arrested and charged with the crime.  After a trial that made international news and was described as being “the trial of the century,” de Marigny was acquitted and the murder of Harry Oakes remains officially unsolved.

It’s an interesting story and it seems like one that should perfectly translate to film.  Surprisingly though, Eureka doesn’t really do it justice.  The film was directed by one of the masters of cinematic surrealism, Nicolas Roeg.  Roeg, of course, is probably best remembered for films like Performance, Don’t Look Now, Walkabout, and The Man Who Fell To Earth.  As one might expect from a Roeg film, Eureka is visually stunning but, as a director, Roeg can’t seem to decide whether he’s more interested in Jack’s ennui or in all the soapy melodrama surrounding Jack’s murder.  As such, neither element of the film gets explored with any particular depth and the resulting film, while always watchable, still feels rather shallow and disjointed.  (After taking forever to reach the end of Jack’s story, Eureka then turns into a rather conventional courtroom drama.  Theresa Russell does get to utter the immortal line, “Did you cut off my father’s head?” but otherwise, it’s kind of dry.)  The film is at its strongest when Jack is just a prospector in Alaska.  The harsh landscape and the crazed dialogue is perfect for Roeg’s dream-like style.  Once the film moves to the Caribbean, it suffers the same fate that befell Jack when he become rich.  It loses its spark.

That said, Eureka has its moments.  Any film that features Gene Hackman, Mickey Rourke, Joe Pesci, Rutger Hauer, and Joe Spinell all acting opposite of each other is going to have at least a few scenes worth watching.  I particularly liked Pesci’s surprisingly subdued performance as Mayakofsky.  With everyone else in the film chewing every piece of scenery on the island, Pesci wisely underplays and is all the more menacing for it.  While Eureka ultimately doesn’t add up too much, it’s worth watching at least once for the cast.

Finally, my personal theory is that Harry Oakes’s murder had more to do with the Duke and Duchess of Windsor (formerly King Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson) than it did with Meyer Lansky.  (The Duke was the governor of the Bahamas at the time of Oakes’s murder.)  But that’s just my opinion.

Spring Breakdown: Love In A Goldfish Bowl (dir by Jack Sher)


The 1961 film, Love in a Goldfish Bowl, tells the story of two college students.

Gordon Slide (Tommy Sands) and Blythe Holloway (Toby Michaels) are best friends.  Their relationship is strictly platonic, though everyone at the college assumes that they’re more than just friends.  Gordon and Blythe both share the common bond of coming from broken but wealthy families and they both want to do something more with their lives than just following the rules.  Blythe is a good student, the daughter of a senator.  Gordon is styles himself as being a cynic, or at least what was considered to be a cynic by the standards of 1961.  (James Dean would have probably called him a phony.)  The school’s headmaster (John McGiver) suspects that 1) Gordon and Blythe are more than just friends and 2) that Gordon is a bad influence on Blythe.  He even orders them to stop seeing each other, which I guess is something that headmasters could get away with in 1961.

Still, it’s going to take more than some stuffy authority figure to keep Gordon and Blythe for enjoying their Spring Break!  Especially when Gordon’s mother happens to own a beach house, which would be the perfect place for the two of them to hang out.  Despite knowing that each of their parent probably wouldn’t approve of them spending the break together, Gordon and Blythe decide to do just that.  Blythe even gets permission for her father, albeit by duplicitous means.  (Gordon imitates the headmaster on the phone.  Wow, that wild and crazy Gordon.)

At first, the beach house seems like the perfect place for Gordon and Blythe to unwind.  But when they meet Giuseppe La Barba (Fabian Forte), things start to change.  A member of the Coast Guard, Giuseppe plots to steal Blythe away from Gordon, with his schemes causing Gordon and Blythe to reconsider their feelings for each other.

Considering that this film is 60 years old, it’s perhaps not surprising that Love In A Goldfish Bowl often feels like it’s a rusty time capsule that someone buried in the sand on a California beach.  Everything from the intrusive headmaster to the scandal of divorce to the domestic routine that both Gordon and Blythe naturally slip into as soon as they arrive at the beach house makes this film feel almost as if it comes from another planet.  While the film is critical of adults who don’t understand what it’s like to be young and idealistic, it also ultimately ends with the suggestion that the adults might not be so clueless themselves.  It’s a bit of a wishy-washy approach to what little conflict the film has to offer up.

My point here is that Love In A Goldfish Bowl is an amazingly innocent little film, the type of Spring Break movie that would cause even your grandma to say, “Those kids really need to loosen up and live a little.”  Usually, I kind of like time capsule films like this, just because I’m a history nerd and I’m always interested in seeing how people used to live and communicate.  Unfortunately, Love In A Goldfish Bowl is a remarkably slow 88 minutes and neither Tommy Sands nor Toby Michaels have enough chemistry to be interesting as friends, let alone as a chaste couple waiting for their wedding night.  Fabian has a little bit more screen presence than Tommy Sands but overall, this is a pretty bland affair.

Ultimately, this film is mostly interesting as an example of what beach movies were like before AIP reinvented the genre with the Frankie and Annette beach party films.  Thank goodness people finally learned how to celebrate being young and on the beach.

Scene that I Love: The Finale of Akira Kurosawa’s Yojimbo


Yojimbo (1961, directed by Akira Kurosawa)

The great filmmaker, Akira Kurosawa, was born 111 years ago today, in Tokyo.  Kurosawa would go on to become one of the most influential directors of all time, making 30 films over a career that lasted 57 years.  Though Kurosawa is often cited as an influence on westerns (Seven Samurai became The Magnificent Seven, Yojimbo inspired Serigo Leone to create The Man With No Name), Kurosawa’s influence goes for beyond just one genre.  He directed action films.  He directed gangster films.  He directed social problem films.  He directed historical epics.  Kurosawa taught an entire generation of future film film directors the language of cinema.

In honor of the anniversary of Akira Kurosawa’s birth, here is a scene that we all love from his 1961 masterpiece, Yojimbo.  Playing the lead role of the lone swordsman is, of course, Kurosawa’s frequent star, Toshiro Mifune.

 

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Michael Haneke Edition


4 (or more) Shots From 4 (or more) Films is just what it says it is, 4 (or more) shots from 4 (or more) of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 (or more) Shots From 4 (or more) Films lets the visuals do the talking.

Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy 79th birthday to the great Austrian director, Michael Haneke!  One of the most thought-provoking and visually proficient directors of all time, Haneke has been challenging viewers for decades.  His films may sometimes be controversial but no one can deny their importance.  Here are….

4 Shots From 4 Michael Haneke Films

Benny’s Video (1992, dir by Michael Haneke, DP: Christian Berger)

Time of the Wolf (2003, dir by Michael Haneke, DP: Jurgen Jurges)

Cache (2005, dir by Michael Haneke, DP: Christian Berger)

The White Ribbon (2009, dir by Michael Haneke, DP: Christian Berger)

Spring Breakdown: Hunk (dir by Lawrence Bassoff)


Released in 1987, Hunk tells the story of Hunk Golden (John Allen Nelson).

At first glance, Hunk seems to have everything.  He lives in a huge house on the beach and he’s good-looking and muscular enough that he can actually pull off the rainbow speedo look.  Women want to be with Hunk and men want to be Hunk.  He’s rich.  He can eat all the food in the world without putting on a single pound.  He’s got a great smile and wonderful tan and he even knows karate!  Hunk drives a red convertible that has a personalized license plate, one that reads: HUNK.  If anyone else did it, it would seem narcissistic but Hunk can pull it off.

However, Hunk is deeply dissatisfied with his life.  As he explains to his psychiatrist, Dr. Sunny Graves (Rebecca Bush), he wasn’t always Hunk Golden.  He used to be a nerdy writer named Brady Brinkman (played by Steve Levitt).  After Brady’s girlfriend left him for an aerobics instructor, he somehow managed to write a guide to how to become rich.  Brady’s wasn’t sure where his inspiration came from but he was still able to make a fortune off of it.  After Brady moved to the beach to work on his next project, he discovered that being wealthy didn’t mean anything unless he also had the right look.

That’s when he was approached by O’Brien (Deborah Shelton), an emissary of the devil (James Coco).  O’Brien turned Brady Brinkman into Hunk Golden and taught him how to be …. well, how to be a hunk.  The only condition was that, after a number of months, Hunk would have to give up his soul to the devil.  Hunk agreed but now, with the deadline approaching, Hunk isn’t so sure that he wants to condemn his soul to eternal damnation.  Is being the hottest guy on the beach really worth an eternity of burning in fire and being poked with those little pitchfork things?

Now, it probably won’t come as a surprise to our regular readers to discover that this film was produced and distributed by Crown International Pictures.  From the 70s through the 80s, Crown International specialized in low-budget exploitation films, with a surprisingly large number of them taking place on the beach.  Nowadays, of course, the Crown International filmography can be found in countless Mill Creek boxsets.  Hunk can be found in several.  I own enough Mill Creek boxsets that I’ve probably got a dozen copies of Hunk in my DVD and Blu-ray collections.

That said, while the film’s low budget is obvious in every frame, Hunk is actually slightly better than the typical Crown International beach film.  While it seems to take forever for Brady to become Hunk, the film has got a likable cast and it actually delivers its message about self-acceptance with a surprising amount of sincerity.  This is the rare Crown International Film with a heart and, for every joke that falls flat (and there’s several), there’s at least a few unexpectedly clever moments.  The film takes an especially strange turn once Hunk becomes a celebrity and starts to wonder if he should accept the devil’s invitation to become a demon and help start a world war.  Steve Levitt and John Allen Nelson both do a good job playing Brady and his alter ego, though all of Nelson’s dialogue appears to have been dubbed.  James Coco delivers his evil lines with a properly devilish glee.  Incidently, this was also Brad Pitt’s first movie.  While he had no dialogue and went uncredited, he can be easily spotted as an extra in one of the beach scenes.

See him?

If you’re looking for silly and occasionally strange 80s beach movie, you could do worse than to check your Mill Creek boxsets for a copy of Hunk.

The Writers Guild Honors Promising Young Woman And, For Some Unfathomable Reason, Borat


The Writers Guild of America has announced their picks for the best written films and TV shows of 2020.  Below are the three film awards.  I’m happy to see Promising Young Woman won for Best Original Screenplay.  As for Borat winning for Best Adapted Screenplay …. yeah, okay.  The WGA can honor whoever they want but just don’t pretend like Borat won for any reason other than the whole Rudy Guiliani thing.  (Does it really take a lot of effort and skill to make Rudy Guiliani look foolish?)  That Borat beat both One Night In Miami and Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom is embarrassing.

Anyway, here’s the winners:

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
Judas and the Black Messiah – Screenplay by Will Berson & Shaka King, Story by Will Berson & Shaka King and Kenny Lucas & Keith Lucas (Warner Bros.)
Palm Springs – Screenplay by Andy Siara, Story by Andy Siara & Max Barbakow (Hulu)
Promising Young Woman – Written by Emerald Fennell (Focus Features)
Sound of Metal – Screenplay by Darius Marder & Abraham Marder, Story by Darius Marder & Derek Cianfrance (Amazon Studios)
The Trial of the Chicago 7 – Written by Aaron Sorkin (Netflix)

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
Borat Subsequent Moviefilm – Screenplay by Sacha Baron Cohen & Anthony Hines & Dan Swimer & Peter Baynham & Erica Rivinoja & Dan Mazer & Jena Friedman & Lee Kern, Story by Sacha Baron Cohen & Anthony Hines & Dan Swimer & Nina Pedrad, Based on Characters Created by Sacha Baron Cohen (Amazon Studios)
Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom – Screenplay by Ruben Santiago-Hudson, Based on the Play Written by August Wilson; (Netflix)
News of the World – Screenplay by Paul Greengrass and Luke Davies, Based upon the Novel by Paulette Jiles (Universal Pictures)
One Night in Miami – Screenplay by Kemp Powers, Based on the Stage Play “One Night in Miami” by Kemp Powers (Amazon Studios)
The White Tiger – Screenplay by Ramin Bahrani, Based on the Book “The White Tiger” by Aravind Adiga (Netflix)

DOCUMENTARY SCREENPLAY
All In: The Fight for Democracy – Written by Jack Youngelson (Amazon Studios)
The Dissident – Written by Mark Monroe and Bryan Fogel (Briarcliff Entertainment)
Herb Alpert Is… – Written by John Scheinfeld (Abramorama)
Red Penguins – Written by Gabe Polsky (Universal Pictures)
Totally Under Control – Written by Alex Gibney (Neon)

Spring Beakdown: The Thirsty Dead (dir by Terry Becker)


So, imagine this.

You’re on vacation in a tropical paradise.  (Maybe you’re even there on Spring Break, just so we can justify including this review in my series of Spring Break film reviews.)  One night, while wandering around the city, you get grabbed by a bunch of robe-wearing monks.  The monks proceed to tie you up and then force you to take a canoe ride from the sewer to the middle of the jungle.  Once you reach the jungle, you’re informed that you’ve been kidnapped by a cult that worships a shrunken head in a box.  The members of the cult have been around for centuries but they’ve managed to retain their youth by drinking the blood of the women who they kidnap off the streets of the city.  Like you, for example.

That would probably freak most people out.  That would certainly freak me out.  Not only do I not particularly care for the jungle but I’m also pretty attached to my blood.  However, when this exact same thing happens in the 1974 film The Thirsty Dead, no one seems to be particularly shocked to hear about it.  Instead, the kidnapped women all kind of shrug and accept their fate as if it all makes total sense.

In fact, Claire (Judith McConnell) appears to develop Stockholm Syndrome within record time.  She’s a dancer in Manila who, within hours of being kidnapped, is soon joking with her abductors.  She makes it clear that she’s apparently fine with being kidnapped and donating her blood to a good cause.  It’s never really clear why she’s okay with that but Claire is so determined to do what she wants to do (even if that means being subservient to a bunch of 100 year-old cultists) that it’s hard not admire her stubbornness.

On the other hand, Laura (Jennifer Billingsley) is determined to escape.  Even though the members of the cult believe that she’s the reincarnation of one of their goddesses, Laura wants to get back to civilization.  She thinks that one of the cultists, Baru (John Considine), might be willing to help her.  However, as Baru explains, if he goes too far into the jungle, he’ll lose his youth and basically just waste away.

(Just in case there’s any doubt on the part of anyone reading this review, the cult is right about the whole eternal youth thing.  One cultist makes the mistake of venturing too far out into the jungle and transforms from 49 to 50 right in front of our eyes!)

The Thirsty Dead is an odd film.  On the one hand, the first few minutes of the film is undeniably sordid.  Claire dances in a cage.  Laura gets knocked over the head by a cultist and ends up with her hands tied behind her back.  The camera lingers on a doll of a baby floating in a sewer.  When the women first find themselves in the jungle, Claire jokes about being sold into prostitution and the whole film, up until that point, has had a rather icky feel to it.  However, once the cult shows up, The Thirsty Dead suddenly becomes a rather tame film, one that’s almost totally free of graphic gore and sexual innuendo.  The Thirsty Dead ultimately feels less like a film and more like an extended episode of some 70s sci-fi show.  For a film about a blood-sucking cult, there’s surprisingly little blood.  It feels a bit off and, to be honest, it’s a little boring.  This is the type of film that calls out for a sleazier approach.

Despite being rather forgettable, The Thirsty Dead has achieved the dubious immortality of being included in several Mill Creek box sets, the ones with names like 100 Horror Classics or 50 Chilling Thrillers.  So, in all probability, you’ve got The Thirsty Dead on DVD or Blu-ray without even realizing it.  If you somehow don’t already have The Thirsty Dead in your film collection, you can always watch it on YouTube or Prime or probably a hundred other streaming sites.  The Thirsty Dead will never die.