A Movie A Day #134: America Ninja 3: Blood Hunt (1989, directed by Cedric Sundstrom)

Posted on May 22, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Is an American Ninja film still an American Ninja film if it doesn’t feature the American Ninja?

That is the question posed by American Ninja 3: Blood Hunt. Michael Dudikoff, who played Joe Armstrong in the first two films, is nowhere to be found. Instead, he has been replaced by Doug Bradley. Fortunately, the movie does not try to pass Bradley off as being Joe Armstrong. Instead, he is a new character, CIA agent Sean Davidson. Sean’s father was a martial arts champion who was killed by gangster while Sean watched. Sean later went to Japan where he was trained in the ways of the ninja. Sean is an American ninja, even if he’s not the American Ninja.

He also happens to be best friends with Jackson (Steve James), who previously appeared in the first two films and who never comments on the coincidence of having two best friends who both happen to be American ninjas. Jackson, along with sidekick Dexter (Evan J. Klisser) and lady ninja Chan Lee (Michele B. Chan), team up with Sean after Sean’s sensei is kidnapped by a terrorist known as The Cobra (Marjoe Gortner). The Cobra, who has a team of his own ninjas, has developed a poison that he wants to test on Sean.

The plot makes as much sense as the previous two American Ninja films and, somehow, everyone forgets about finding the sensei before the movie ends. As an actor, Doug Bradley is no Michael Dudikoff (which is saying something) but he’s good in the fight scenes and that is the only thing that really matters. The whole film is nearly worth it just to see former child evangelist Marjoe Gortner in the role of The Cobra. Dudikoff is missed but at least his absence meant that Steve James got to do more in American Ninja 3 than he did in the first two films. Sadly, just three years after this film’s release, James died as the result of pancreatic cancer. He was 41 years old.

Screwball Comedian: Joe E. Brown in ALIBI IKE (Warner Brothers 1935)

Posted on May 22, 2017 by gary loggins

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We’re about a quarter of the way through the baseball season, so let’s take a trip to the ballpark with Joe E. Brown in ALIBI IKE, a 1935 comedy based on a story by Ring Lardner, one of the best baseball writers of the early 20th Century. Brown, known for his wide mouth and comical yell, is an admittedly acquired taste; his “gosh, golly” country bumpkin persona is not exactly what modern audiences go for these days. But back in the 30’s he was one of Hollywood’s top box-office draws, specializing in sports themed comedies revolving around wrestling (SIT TIGHT), track and field (LOCAL BOY MAKES GOOD), swimming (YOU SAID A MOUTHFUL), polo (POLO JOE), football ($1,000 A TOUCHDOWN), and racing (boats in TOP SPEED, airplanes in GOING WILD, bicycles in SIX DAY BIKE RACE).

ALIBI IKE is the final chapter in Brown’s “baseball trilogy”. The first, 1932’s FIREMAN, SAVE MY CHILD, found him…

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A Movie A Day #133: American Ninja 2: The Confrontation (1987, directed by Sam Firstenberg)

Posted on May 21, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Duuuuuuuuude! The American Ninja is back!

In this sequel to the first American Ninja, ninja Joe (Michael Dudikoff) and sidekick Jackson (Steve James) are now Army Rangers. They have been assigned to provide security at an embassy on a small Caribbean island. At first, it seems like an easy gig but then Joe discovers that a large number of Marines have recently vanished. According to the only witness, they were abducted by men dressed in black. Joe and Jackson know what that means!

The Marines are being set up by a traitor in their own ranks, Tommy Taylor (played by Miguel Ferrer look-alike Jonathan Pienaar). Taylor is being blackmailed by a master criminal known as, I kid you not, Leo the Lion (Gary Conway, who also co-wrote the script). Leo is brainwashing the Marines, shooting them up with all sorts of drugs and transforming them into zombie-style ninjas.

Doing away with any pretense towards reality, American Ninja 2 is pure comic book action. A bad guy even says, “It’s the American Ninja!” when he sees Joe. It’s a strange film. On the one hand, it is full of goofy humor and it even has a streetwise kid sidekick, all things that would indicate that it was made to appeal to kids. On the other hand, the first cut was reportedly so violent that it got a dreaded X-rating. The final version still has enough impalings, decapitations, and throwing stars to the head to earn its R.

With its combination of nonstop action and Steve James one-liners, American Ninja 2 is both a worthy sequel and a worthy addition to the Cannon library. Still, it bothers me that at least a few of the ninjans that Joe and Jackson killed were probably just brainwashed Marines. That amounts to a lot of innocent victims being killed by our heroes.

The life of an American ninja is never an easy one.

What Else Lisa Watched Last Night #166: Seduced By A Stranger (dir by Scott Belyea)

Posted on May 21, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Secrets of My Stepdaughter was not the only thing that I watched last night! I also watched Seduced By A Stranger on the Lifetime Movie Network.

Why Was I Watching It?

When a movie is called Seduced By A Stranger, you watch it. Seduced is one of the most powerful words in the English language. I even tried to get Arleigh to call this site Through the Seduced Lens but he ended up going with Shattered instead.

(Which is okay because shattered is almost as powerful word as seduced. Someday, Lifetime will realize that I’m right and commission a film called Shattered Seduction. I’m already working on the script.)

What Was It About?

It’s about a woman who is seduced by a stranger.

Actually, there’s a little more to it than just that. In fact, it’s actually a movie about a teenager named Dana (Cate Sproule) and her good-for-nothing (but charming) father named Martin (Steve Bacic). Because Martin is a professional con man, Dana and Martin have never stayed in one place for too long. Dana feels like she’s missing out on life.

So, Martin agrees to settle down in a nice little town. Dana finally gets to enroll in high school. She even meets a cute boy named Charlie (Madison Smith) and soon, they’re a couple. However, Martin is also dating Charlie’s mother (Chandra West) and Dana is worried that her father is going to slip back into his old ways.

And, of course, there’s the stalker. Sloane (Lucie Guest) lost everything to one of Martin’s cons and she’s determined to get her revenge. Now that Martin has settled down in one place, it looks like she may finally get her chance…

What Worked?

This one was a lot of fun and actually kind of sweet in its own weird way. Charlie and Dana were a really likable couple and you hoped that things would work out for them. Both Cate Sproule and Madison Smith gave good performances and it was kind of nice to see a Lifetime film where, for once, the teenagers were alright and the adults were totally clueless.

Lucie Guest did a good job as crazy Sloane. The best role in any Lifetime film is always the obsessive stalker and Guest really made the most of the opportunity.

What Did Not Work?

It all worked. It was fun and enjoyable Lifetime film. The only thing that kept it from being perfect was that there was no kitchen dance party.

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

When someone says that Dana has stolen Charlie’s heart, Dana instinctively responds with, “I don’t steal.” For some reason, I related to that moment.

(I know that’s vague but identifying an “Oh my God! Just like me!” moment is not an exact science.)

Lessons Learned

Sometimes, being seduced by a stranger is the best thing that can happen to you.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #165: Secrets of my Stepdaughter (dir by Jem Garrard)

Posted on May 21, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I watched Secrets of my Stepdaughter on Lifetime!

Why Was I Watching It?

Why Not? It was on Lifetime and Secrets of my Stepdaughter is a great title. As our regular readers know, Jeff, Leonard, and I spent all last month watching and reviewing the first two seasons on Twin Peaks. As soon as I saw the title of this Lifetime film, I immediately thought of that great line from the third episode of series: “She is full of secrets.”

What Was It About?

When teenager Rachel Kent (Tiera Skovbye) survives a robbery that leaves her best friend dead, she becomes a minor media celebrity. Everyone loves Rachel but the detective (Lucia Walters) in charge of the case has suspicions. And soon, so does Rachel’s stepmother, Cindy (Josie Davis). Rachel is just enjoying being a celebrity too much and when Cindy catches Rachel rehearsing the story of the robbery in front of a mirror, Cindy starts to suspect that Rachel may indeed be full of secrets.

What Worked?

The film told an intriguing story. It opened with a title card telling us that it was “based on a true story” and I’d believe it. This is actually something that happens fairly regularly. A victim of a crime will become a minor celebrity, just to then have it revealed that they actually committed the crime themselves. People love the attention. What’s interesting is that you never hear much about these people once it’s revealed that they were not victims but instead guilty. They kind of get pushed to the side and the story gets abandoned because no one wants to admit to having been fooled.

Josie Davis gave a good performance as Cindy. She’s appeared in several Lifetime films and it was interesting to see her finally play a sympathetic character for once. The entire film, however, was stolen by Tiera Skovbye, who was a force of cheerfully destructive nature in the role of Rachel.

What Did Not Work?

This was yet another Lifetime film where the family pet is killed off, presumably so we don’t have any doubt that we’re dealing with a total sociopath. Killing the dog felt so cruelly unnecessary and totally gratuitous that it made it difficult for me to enjoy the rest of the movie. It seemed to be done for shock value but, at this point, so many pets have been killed in so many Lifetime movies that it’s no longer shocking.

Seriously, leave the pets alone!

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

“Wow, Lisa, since this movie was about a sociopathic, shoplifting teenage murderer, there were probably a lot of Oh my God! Just like me! moments!”

Okay, you are no longer my friend.

Actually, to be honest, I did relate to Rachel at the very beginning of the movie. When she was rehearsing in front of the mirror, I gave her the benefit of the doubt because I do that too. But then it became obvious that she actually had killed her best friend and the family dog and I was like, “Nope, I have nothing in common with this psycho!”

Lessons Learned

It’s a lot more difficult to fake a crime than you might think.

A Movie A Day #132: American Ninja (1985, directed by Sam Firstenberg)

Posted on May 20, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Hell yeah!

From Yoram Globus and Menahem Golan, the duo who were responsible for producing the coolest films of the 1980s, comes American Ninja!

Private Joe Armstrong (Michael Dudikoff) is the newest arrival on an American army base in the Philippines. A former member of a street gang, he has been forced to enlist in the army in order to keep himself out of jail. Because he keeps to himself, the other soldiers do not like him. Colonel Hickock (Guich Kook) is angry that his daughter, Patricia (Judie Aronson), likes Joe and conspires to have Joe court martialed. Joe’s only friend is Corporal Jackson (Steve James), who starts out as an enemy but changes his ways after Joe shows off some sweet martial arts moves. Because Joe is an amnesiac, he does not know where or why he learned how to fight. He just knows that he can.

It’s good that he can because the local black marketer, Ortega (Don Stewart) has hired the legendary Black Star ninjas to help him steal supplies from the base. Ortega has even allowed the ninjas to set up a training camp in his back yard. When Joe prevents the ninjas from kidnapping Patricia, the ninjas swear revenge.

As if there could possibly be any doubt, American Ninja was made and distributed by Cannon Films. It is about as pure an example of the Cannon aesthetic as anyone could hope to find. Find a star — in this case, Michael Dudikoff — who was credible without being expensive. Give him a love interest who was easy on the eyes and who could get held hostage during the film’s climax. Toss in slow motion stunt work, big explosions, and Steve James. Come up with a title that would appeal to both NASCAR-loving patriots and drive-in movie fans. End result: American Ninja!

As a film, American Ninja get the job done and then some. The fights are well-choreographed and the movie does not allow things like character development or subtext to get in the way of showcasing plenty of ninja action. There are enough weird details, especially after Joe dons the black pajamas of the American Ninja, to keep the move interesting. At one point, a ninja literally vanishes and what’s cool is that no one acts surprised when it happens. Long before Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, American Ninja showed that there’s nothing a ninja can’t do!

One final note: Keep an eye out for my favorite scene, in which a slow-moving jeep bumps into a tree and explodes with all the force of a planet that’s just been zapped by the Death Star.

The Legend of BILLY JACK Continues! (National Student film Co 1971, re-released by Warner Brothers 1973)

Posted on May 20, 2017 by gary loggins

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When last we saw Billy Jack, he was dismantling a brood of outlaw bikers in BORN LOSERS . This time around, he’s taking on a whole town’s worth of rednecks as Tom Laughlin’s half-breed ex-Green Beret returns in BILLY JACK, the wildly popular film that combines action with social commentary, and helped kick off the martial arts craze of the 70’s.

BILLY JACK almost never saw the light of day, as Laughlin’s financing was shut off by American-International Pictures. 20th Century-Fox then picked it up, but didn’t think it deserved to be released, so Laughlin went the indie route, under the banner of National Student Film Co. in 1971. Poor distribution and poor reviews caused the film to tank, but the good folks at Warner Brothers saw something in it, and gave it a national release two years later. Young audiences of the day flocked to it in droves, cheering as Billy Jack…

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Lisa Cleans Out Her DVR: The Other Mother (dir by Sean Olson)

Posted on May 20, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

(Once again, I am attempting to clean out my DVR! I recorded The Other Mother off of Lifetime on April 22nd, 2017.)

Divorce is never easy. This is something that we all know. A once loving couple splits up and suddenly, they are forced to figure out what type of relationship, if any, they will now have. It’s even more difficult for the children, who often find themselves torn between two households, all the while wondering if they’re somehow responsible. Believe me, speaking as a child of divorce, it’s never easy even if it’s often for the best.

That said, you know what I bet would make a divorce even more difficult? When your ex-husband impulsively marries a woman who is young enough to be his daughter and then sits by while his new wife not only turns your daughter against you but also frames you so that everyone thinks you’re a totally irresponsible, abusive alcoholic.

That, of course, is exactly what happens in The Other Mother. The title character is Tiffany (Kimberly Crossman), who is pretty, confident, fun, and a little bit psycho. When she marries Mitch (Tyler Christopher), she immediately sets about to manipulate his teenager daughter, Brooke (Kennedy Tucker), into rejecting her biological mother, and Mitch’s ex-wife, Jackie (Annie Wersching).

It’s really not that hard because 1) Tiffany is close to Brooke’s own age and 2) Jackie is massively overprotective and strict. Of course, Brooke has struggled to deal with the divorce. Jackie worries that Brooke might act out or that she might even hurt herself. Last year, Jackie caught Brooke drinking and she still hasn’t let it go.

Tiffany, at least at first, appears to take a much more laissez faire approach to life. At dinner, she asks Brooke if she wants anything to drink. At Brooke’s birthday party, Tiffany gives her a car and Jackie throws a fit. When Tiffany picks up Brooke from school, they go to the mall and Tiffany shows Brooke how to pick up boys. Brooke would much rather hang out with her stepmom and who can blame her? Tiffany’s fun and lets her do almost anything.

Of course, Tiffany also has a long and sordid history, one that is only Google search away. And Tiffany is willing to do anything to get Jackie out of the picture. If that means getting Jackie drunk and then pretending that Jackie attacked her, so be it. If that means telling lies and hacking phones in order to make it appear as if Jackie has rejected her daughter, well, that’s what you have to do.

The Other Mother is a good example of a Lifetime film designed to tap into a fear that’s probably a pretty common one among middle-aged divorcees, the fear of no longer being the fun parent but instead being viewed as the enemy. This film provides comfort by suggesting that the new fun mom is actually not that much fun and that she’s probably crazy as well. Beyond bitter divorcees, anyone who has ever been made to feel inadequate by an ex’s new girlfriend will be able to relate to this film.

If you’re into Lifetime films, you’ll probably enjoy The Other Mother. If nothing else, Kimberly Crossman does a really good job playing the cheerfully psychotic Tiffany. The movie may not hold many surprises but I definitely had fun watching it.

Lisa Cleans Out Her DVR: Girl Followed (dir by Tom Shell)

Posted on May 20, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

(Once again, I am trying to clean out my DVR. I recorded Girl Followed off of the Lifetime Movie Network on April 2nd, 2017.)

Poor Regan (Emma Fuhrmann)! She’s 14 years old and all she wants is to be as popular as her older sister, Taylor (Gianna LaPera), and her best friend, Sabine (Olivia Nikkanen), and for Austin (Jake Elliott) to like her. Taylor and Sabine managed to get boyfriends by sending them sexy pics so why can’t she do the same thing? Everyone else skips school, so why can’t she? Everyone else shoplifts so why is it such a big deal when she does it? As Regan points out, her parents (Heather McComb and Joey Lawrence) expect her to be so perfect that they always overreact to the least little mistake.

Of course, they would really freak out if they found out about Regan’s now boyfriend. Nate (Travis Caldwell) is handsome, charming, and he drives a really nice car. Even better, at least from my perspective, his parents own a really big house. (If you’ve been reading my reviews for a while, you are undoubtedly aware of how much I love the big houses that always show up in Lifetime movies.) Of course, there are some problems. For one thing, Nate is 22 years old. Nate has a tendency to be a little bit controlling. Nate works with Regan’s mother, at a clinic. (Hey, at least he’s in the medical field! Who doesn’t want to marry a doctor?)

Oh — and Nate’s also batshit insane. How insane is Nate? He’s insane enough to hack into Regan’s phone and send risqué pictures of her to everyone who works with her dad. He’s also insane enough to replace a patient’s chart, all in an attempt to make Regan’s mother look dangerously incompetent. And, of course, there’s the whole kidnapping thing. Nate has a sordid and dangerous history that Regan knows nothing about.

Girl Followed may sound like a typical Lifetime stalking film and, in many ways, it is. However, Girl Followed also has a surprisingly insightful and intelligent script. If anything, Nate and his issues are red herrings in the overall scheme of the film. Girl Followed is more concerned with Regan and her struggle to estabblish her identity in an increasingly complex world. Anyone who has ever been insecure or felt lost will be able to relate to what Regan’s going through and Emma Fuhrmann gives an excellent and empathetic performance in the role. She is especially strong in the scenes where she tentatively opens up to her therapist, admitting that — on a scale of one to ten — she considers herself to be a “two.”

Of course, I related to the character because, when I was her age, I used to act out in the exact same way. This movie features one of the most realistic shoplifting scenes that I’ve ever seen. When her mom steps up and declares that her daughter is not a shoplifter and shames anyone who would suggest otherwise, I cringed a little and not just because I knew that Regan actually was a shoplifter. It was a moment to which I could relate. Suddenly, I was fourteen years old again.

Girl Followed is definitely a better than average Lifetime film so keep an eye out for it.

A Movie A Day #131: Rich Girl (1991, directed by Joel Bender)

Posted on May 19, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Courtney Wells (Jill Schoelen) is a rich girl (hence, the title). Realizing that she is 21 years old and has yet to really experience life, Courtney declares her independence. She breaks up with her cheating fiancée and tells her industrialist father (Paul Gleason, of course) that she no longer wants to go into the family business. When her father responds by cutting her off, the rich girl becomes a poor girl. Though she struggles at first, Courtney eventually trades her Ferrari for a reasonable car, finds a cheap apartment, and gets a job working as a waitress at a trendy Los Angeles nightclub, which is owned by Rocco (Ron Karabastos, of course). She falls in love with aspiring musician Rick (Don Michael Paul) but he is already involved with his cokehead lead singer (Cherie Currie) and Courtney’s father will do anything to keep her and Rick apart.

In the early 1990s, Rich Girl was a late night HBO mainstay. There is nothing surprising about the movie and Rick’s band has a sound that was already dated by 1991. (While the rest of America is learning to love grunge, Rick and his band are still playing Bon Jovi cover tunes in the garage.) However, Rich Girl does star the always gorgeous Jill Schoelen, which makes it a hundred times better than every other low-budget film that showed up on HBO in the early 90s. Whatever happened to her?