Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 2/4/24 — 2/10/24

Posted on February 10, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

You would think that, being stuck on the couch with an injured ankle, I would have watched a lot of television this week. I didn’t. Instead, I barely turned on the TV. Instead, I spent most of my time listening to music and wondering if this year is going to continue in a sucky direction or if its going to redeem itself.

Here’s a few thoughts on what little I did watch:

Abbott Elementary (Wednesday Night, ABC)

Abbott Elementary, the most acclaimed sitcom on network TV, started its 3rd season this week with a special hour-long episode in which Janine left her teaching job and took a job with the school district. Meanwhile, her relationship with Gregory continued to be awkward, Barbara continued to be the voice of wisdom, Ava briefly tried to be a good principle before returning to her old ways, and Melissa broke up with her latest boyfriend. And, of course, Career Day was a disaster.

The premiere had its amusing moments but …. I don’t know. Something felt a bit off to me. I’m not really sure I like the idea of Janine working for the school district. It seems like one of those storylines that is just going to be dragged out for way too long and, even worse, it feels like it was mostly included so the show could find another excuse to keep Janine and Gregory from getting together. Gregory’s social awkwardness, which was so likable during the previous two seasons, is starting to feel a bit old now. You’ve been at the school for three years, dude! YOU CAN SMILE! On the plus side, quarterback Jalen Hurts was good playing himself. (“My boundaries are extremely porous.’) We’ll see how things go with the rest of the season. I have faith in Abbott.

Check it Out (Tubi)

I re-watched last week’s episode Check It Out! earlier today. My review should be dropping soon.

Law & Order (Thursday Night, NBC)

It was a good episode this week. Nolan Price got his conviction but at the cost of giving immunity to one of the sleaziest characters to ever appear on the show. That led to another recriminating glare from Maroun. As for the cops are concerned, I’m liking the laid-back vibe that Reid Scott is bringing to his role. Until this season started, I never realized how nervous I would get whenever I had to watch any scene featuring Jeffrey Donavon as the ultra-intense Cosgrove. With Reid Scott, I feel like I can actually breathe.

Snub (Night Flight Plus)

This was a BBC music show from the 80s, featuring independent British bands. I watched an episode on Friday night, featuring a bunch of British rappers. It was okay. For the most part, I liked the no-nonsense, no apologies attitude of the hosts. They were British, working class, and proud of it.

Watched and reviewed elsewhere:

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 4.1 “Sergeant Bull/Friends and Lovers/Miss Mother”

Posted on February 7, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, come aboard for season 4!

Episode 4.1 “Sergeant Bull/Friends and Lovers/Miss Mother”

(Dir by Roger Duchowny, originally aired on October 25th, 1980)

Well, it’s time for the fourth season of The Love Boat and let’s see who is going to be taking a cruise this week….

Hey, we know that guy!

Yes, it’s a young Tom Hanks, making one of his first television appearances on The Love Boat. Tom had a sitcom coming out so ABC decided to promote the then-unknown actor by giving him a guest role on one of their most popular series.

Who does Tom play? He plays a complete a total douchebag named Rick Martin, a former fraternity brother of Gopher’s who enjoys giving Gopher a hard time about his reputation for being “Strike-Out Smith.” Rick makes Gopher feel so uncomfortable that Gopher impulsively claims that Julie is his girlfriend. Julie plays along with Gopher. This not only leads to sleazy Rick trying to steal Julie away from Gopher but it also causes Julie and Gopher to have real feelings for each other.

Yes, it is interesting to watch Tom Hanks play a sleaze but what is even more interesting, for longtime watchers of the show, is that Julie and Gopher make a surprisingly credible couple. They actually do have a very likable chemistry together and it never seems improbable that they might end up together. Of course, in the end, they decide to just stay friends because anything else would have upset the balance of the show.

Tom’s presence overshadows the rest of the show but there are two other stories to deal with. Vic Tayback plays a former dill sergeant who reunites with his former recruits (Nipsey Russell, Harvey Lembeck, and Jack Somack) and who turns out to still be such a hardass that they bribe their cabin stewardess (Doris Roberts) to pursue a romance with him. Of course, the two of them fall in love for real. This was all a bit silly and Tayback’s drill sergeant was a bit annoying but it was nice to see him drop his guard around Doris Roberts and admit that he was only acting like a drill sergeant because that was all he had ever been.

Finally, Gwen Hutchins (Shelley Smith) boards the boat and tells Doc Bricker that she is two-months pregnant.

“Your husband must be very proud!” Doc replies, without missing a beat.

No, Gwen explains, she’s not married. Once again, we are reminded that Doc is a walking HR nightmare.

Anyway, Gwen falls for a guy named Dennis (Dennis Cole) but she worries how Dennis will react to learning that she’s pregnant. At first, Dennis does not react well, even asking her if she considered getting an abortion. (She explains that she doesn’t support abortion, which definitely would not fly if this episode were made today.) It all works out in the end but, seriously, I think she deserves better than Dennis. Dennis Cole is an actor who I have seen in quite a few of these shows and he always seem kind of lost. That was certainly the vibe that he gave off here.

This was an entertaining-enough episode, though almost all of the credit for that goes to the presence of Tom Hanks and the likable chemistry between Fred Grandy and Lauren Tewes. It was definitely a good way to start off the fourth season.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 1/28/24 — 2/3/24

Posted on February 3, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This previous week …. bleh. Let’s just take a look at what I watched.

The Bachelor (Monday Night, ABC)

Eh. I’m pretty lukewarm on the new bachelor. He seems like a nice guy but he’s kind of boring.

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)

I reviewed Baywatch Nights here!

Check it Out (Tubi)

I’m running behind but I’ll have a review of this week’s episode up sometime on Sunday.

CHiPs (Freevee)

I reviewed CHiPs here!

Degrassi Junior High (YouTube)

I reviewed Degrassi here!

Fantasy Island (YouTube)

I reviewed Fantasy Island here!

Football (Sunday)

Did I watched two football games on Sunday? According to my notes, Jeff and I watched two playoff games but I’ll be darned if I can tell you a dang thing about either one of them.

Friday the 13th (YouTube)

I’m running behind but I’ll have a review of this week’s episode up sometime on Sunday.

Happy Hour (YouTube)

I watched an episode of this old 90s game show on Saturday morning. Dweezil and Ahmet Zappa asked bizarre questions to celebrities. Dweezil was cool but Ahmet was like the hyperactive cousin that no one wants to deal with at the family reunion. Amongst the celebrities were Chuck Woolery, Alexandra Paul, Patton Oswalt, and that “Let’s Get Ready To Rumble” ring announcer dude.

Highway to Heaven (Freevee)

I wrote about this week’s episode here!

Judge Dad (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched an episode in which Judge Dad dealt with a woman who claimed her Canadian husband only married her for a visa. Judge Dad interrupted the show so he could do a commercial for some sort of special food delivery system. I followed this episode with an episode in which Judge Dad admonished a man for slashing his ex’s tires. Both episodes featured the same disclosure. Judge Dad is not a lawyer and the cases are fiction.

Law & Order (Thursday Night, NBC)

I got caught up with the first three episodes of the new season this week. I am really impressed by Reid Scott, who is this season’s newest cast member. He and Mehcad Brooks are working well together and Brooks, for his part, is no longer quite as stiff as he was the previous season. Sam Waterston, bless him, is obviously not in the best of health and I really hope he retires after this season and enjoys life. So far, Nolan Price appears to have mellowed out, especially when compared to previous two seasons. But what has happened to Maroun? She was finally showing some sparks of having a personality at the end of the previous season but now, she’s back to being a humorless scold who wears too much lipstick.

The first three episodes of the new season were all fairly good. I cringe whenever the blue collar cops on Law & Order start talking like MSNC pundits (and I still laugh whenever I remember last season’s “Did you all see Morning Joe?”). Law & Order will probably never be the beacon of quality that it once was but this season is off to a good start.

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I reviewed the third season finale here!

Miami Vice (Tubi)

I reviewed Miami Vice here!

Monsters (Tubi)

I wrote about Monsters here!

Sally Jessy Raphael (YouTube)

Sally talked to women who felt their marriage were in trouble. All of the husband were total deadbeats. One guy came out on stage wearing his uniform from McDonald’s. I’m sure the bosses were really happy about that.

So Here’s What Happened (YouTube)

I wrote about this obscure pilot here!

Square Pegs (YouTube)

This was a sitcom from the early 80s, about two girls trying to be popular in high school. I watched the pilot on Friday night and I smiled a few times. Trying to fit in is a timeless subject. One of the girls was played by Sarah Jessica Parker, who I love because, like me, she’s a part of the Big Nose Crew. BNC FOREVER!

T and T (Tubi)

I wrote about T and T here!

Welcome Back, Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about it here!

Retro Television Reviews: The Love Boat 3.28 “No Girls for Doc/Marriage of Convenience/The Caller/The Witness”

Posted on January 31, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the third season of The Love Boat comes to a conclusion with an extra-long episode!

Episode 3.28 “No Girls for Doc/Marriage of Convenience/The Caller/The Witness”

(Dir by Gordon Farr and Richard Kinon, originally aired on May 3rd, 1980)

The finale of The Love Boat‘s third season features stage legend and two-time Oscar winner, Helen Hayes. Hayes was considered to be such a big “get” for the show that she receives the zoom lens treatment when she steps onto the ship and all of the action seems to stop for a few minutes, presumably so the audience at home can give her a standing ovation.

Personally, I think Helen Hayes was pretty cool. Along with being a hell of an actress (one whose career extended for over six decades), she was also the wife of Charles MacArthur, an acquaintance of the Algonquin round table, an outspoken Republican, a strong supporter of many charities, and a major benefactor of the Helen Hayes Hospital, a rehabilitation clinic in New York that has made major strides in treating physical disabilities. To say that there are people in the world who can walk because of Helen Hayes is not hyperbole.

That said, Helen Hayes’s story is the dullest one on this cruise. It’s not Hayes’s fault. She is her usual outspoken and likable self. It’s just the storyline itself doesn’t offer up much in the way of drama or comedy. Hayes plays Agatha Winslow, a widow who was married to a friend of Stubing’s. Stubing asks Julie to set Agatha up with someone but then they see Agatha hugging a younger man and Julie says that it won’t be necessary.

AGCK! I HOPE NOT! The younger man is played Helen Hayes’s son, James MacArthur!

No worries. MacArthur is playing Scott Burgess, who is Agatha’s nephew. Scott is a member of the protestant clergy who has never married because he feels that he has to take care of Agatha. Scott and Beatrice Dale (Mildred Natwick) hope that Agatha will fall in love with and marry Beatrice’s brother, a businessman named Hollister (Maurice Evans). Hollister owns a carpet company and he spends most of the episode look down at and commenting on the quality of the ship’s floor. Agatha does not marry Hollister but she does realize that it’s time for her to move on and live her own life. It’s all very pleasant but not very extremely interesting.

Far more interesting is the story of Gail Padgett (Christopher Norris), a woman who is boarding the ship because she needs to get away from her landline phone. As she explains to Julie, someone has been calling and harassing her for months. At no point does Julie suggest what I would suggest, which is that Gail should call the cops. Indeed, when Gail starts to get calls on the boat, Julie never suggests calling the police or going to the captain or anything else. Instead, Gail tells her stalker that she’ll meet him at the Pirate’s Cove Bar. She tells Julie that she has a plan to humiliate him. And again, you would think Julie might say, “How about we just arrest him when he comes in the bar?” But instead, Julie smiles. It’s the Love Boat! No one is murdered on The Love Boat! (Not yet, anyway.)

Gail’s stalker is a nerdy fellow named Melvin, who is played by a young Martin Short. Before Melvin can arrive, Gail is approached by Jack Stander (Larry Breeding). “Hi, I’m Robert Redford,” Jack says before admitting that he’s not Robert Redford and that he spent hours coming up with that opening line. Thinking that Jack is her stalker, Gail takes Jack to her cabin where she get him to undress and then tosses all of his clothes out the porthole. So now, Gail has not only flirted with and then stood up her stalker but she’s also committed theft. WAY TO GO, GAIL!

Anyway, Gail eventually realizes that Jack is not her stalker and they fall in love. Melvin is eventually revealed to be the caller but everyone laughs it off because he’s so nerdy. (Because we all know how harmless nerdy stalkers are….) This was a really weird story but, despite the stupidity of their characters, Christopher Norris and Larry Breeding made for a cute, likably vapid couple.

Maybe Gail should have gone to Wayne Dobson (Larry Wilcox) for help. Wayne is an uptight assistant D.A. who has spent the last two months in a hotel room with Pat Bigelow (Catherine Bach), a witness to a crime who is in protective custody. Even when Pat boards the cruise, Wayne has to come with her and stay in an adjoining cabin. Pat is annoyed but she understand that Wayne is just doing his job.

However, Wayne has fallen in love with Pat and he is upset to receive a telegram saying that the crooks have decided to plead guilty and that Pat can be released from protective custody. Isaac, who was perhaps a bit too excited when he earlier thought Wayne was a male gigolo who was being paid to escort Pat, suggests that Wayne just lie and not let Pat know that her life is no longer in danger. Wayne agrees and Isaac takes Wayne off to give him a makeover that will be so impressive that Pat will fall in love with him and reject notorious Love Boat lothario Mark Bridges (John McCook).

(Of course, any relationship that Wayne and Pat could ever have would be built on lies but whatever….)

Pat does fall for Wayne, though less because of the makeover and more because Wayne finally stops being so uptight. She’s a bit miffed when she finds out that Wayne has been lying to her but she forgives him easily because this is The Love Boat.

Finally, after a night of skinny dipping leads to him losing his clothes and money, Doc announces that he’s through with women. (And again, it doesn’t seem to occur to anyone that maybe Doc should call the police.) That should be a relief to the crew because Doc really is a lawsuit waiting to happen. Instead, they takes bets on how long it will take Doc to go back on his word. It doesn’t take long. Any story that centered around Doc being a Casanova just felt silly. Bernie Kopell was likable as Doc but he was also a bit too naturally mild-mannered to be believable as a legendary lothario.

And so ends the third season of The Love Boat. Vicki is now firmly a member of the crew. Julie has given up on finding love. Isaac and Gopher are as silly as ever. And Doc is going to get the cruise line sued. The 90-minute finale was a bit overextended and had some weak story elements but, overall, the third season was a lot of fun.

Next week …. SEASON 4!

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 1/21/24 — 1/27/24

Posted on January 27, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Here’s some thoughts on what I watched this week!

Acting Sheriff (YouTube)

I wrote about Acting Sheriff here!

The Bachelor (Monday Night, ABC)

A new season of The Bachelor started this week. After skipping the previous few installments of this franchise, I did watch the first episode of the latest season. The new bachelor is kind of dull but I enjoyed seeing the mansion and all of the clothes. Jesse is kind of a boring host. The Bachelor hasn’t been fun since Chris Harrison was fired for upsetting the online horde.

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)

I wrote about Baywatch Nights here!

Check It Out (Tubi)

My review of Check It Out may be an hour or two late this week. It’s been a busy day.

CHiPs (Freevee)

I wrote about CHiPs here!

Couples Court With The Cutlers (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched an episode in which the Cutlers talked to a woman who was accused of cheating on her fiancée with her husband. What? Yes, it was confusing and silly and the fact that the fiancée had a high-pitched, cartoon character voice did not help matters. This was one of those episodes where they brought in the “voice analysist” to determine who was lying. Considering that everyone on the show had a terrible voice, I did not envy the analysist. That said, I also have a hard time understanding how voice analysis can be used in the place of a polygraph. Anyway, no one was cheating according to their voices.

I followed this up with an episode in which a husband accused his wife of cheating because of muddy footprints that he found in his home. The wife was not cheating and the husband was a bit of a paranoid freak.

Later, I watched an episode in which a man felt that his wife was cheating on him because she was no longer wearing sexy underwear around him, despite the fact that he kept finding brand new thongs in the laundry. The lie detector indicated that she was indeed cheating. The wife, at one point, said that she felt like she was “starring in a romantic comedy with Will Smith.”

Then, tonight, I watched an episode in which a woman thought her much older husband was cheating on her with her best friend because she found her friend in their bed. Fortunately, it turned out that the husband was faithful and the best friend was just a blackout drunk.

Degrassi Junior High (YouTube)

I wrote about Degrassi Junior High here!

Extended Family (Tuesday Night, NBC)

I had no interest in watching this show but I was watching Peacock on Wednesday night and I was too lazy to switch to another streaming service when the show automatically started. Jon Cryer plays a divorced father in Boston who is still friends with his ex-wife and her new fiancé. Why is everything always set in Boston? Seriously, who care about freaking Boston?

Anyway, I was so lazy that I ended up watching the first two episodes and they were both pretty dire. The “created by Mike O’Malley” credit card explained why. Cryer, our beloved Duckie, is even more pathetic here than he was as wimpy Alan on Two and a Half Men. (Disclaimer: I think I’ve seen like five episodes of Two and A Half Men, maybe six.) It’s sad to think that NBC has gone from The Office to Night Court/Extended Family.

Fantasy Island (YouTube)

I wrote about Fantasy Island here!

Friday the 13th (YouTube)

I wrote about Friday the 13th here!

Hell’s Kitchen (Thursday Night, Fox)

I was so happy Ryan won! This was one of Hell’s Kitchen’s best seasons. While Big Brother, Survivor, and even The Amazing Race have struggled to remain relevant in our new, post-COVID age, Hell’s Kitchen succeeds by not messing with what works.

Highway to Heaven (Tubi)

I wrote about Highway to Heaven here!

Judge Dad (YouTube)

I watched two episodes of this courtroom show on Monday. The very slow-talking judge heard a case about a woman who wanted another woman to pay for her $900 Prada dress. The second case involved a woman who felt that her ex owed her some sort of compensation for giving her COVID. The second case bothered me because the judge’s ruling didn’t seem to follow any sort of legal precedent. I then noticed a disclaimer that stated that 1) Judge Dad was not a legal expert but just some guy making his own decisions and 2) the litigants were actors and the cases were all fictional.

On Tuesday, I watched an episode in which a tenant sued her landlord for setting up spy cameras in her apartment and “recording me in my lingerie.” Judge Dad was particularly upset by this case. “I feel like you are my daughter!” he thundered, “You must make better decision about where you live!” The landlord was really, really sleazy and disgusting but again, the whole thing was fictional so …. yeah.

Judge Mom (YouTube)

On Wednesday, I watched an episode of Judge Dad‘s companion series, Judge Mom. A young comic book artist accused an older artist of stealing his ideas. Judge Mom found in favor of the younger artist. Just as with Judge Dad, the episode ended with a disclaimed that “Judge Mom is not a legal expert” and the case was fictional. The acting on Judge Mom was far less convincing than the acting on Judge Dad.

It was just bad enough that I had to watch a second episode. This one featured a set of parents suing a little league team for “firing” their son from the team. Judge Mom was offended by how petty all of the adults were. Little league is supposed to be about the kids! You tell ’em, Judge Mom!

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I wrote about The Love Boat here!

Miami Vice (Tubi)

I wrote about Miami Vice here!

Monsters (Tubi)

I wrote about Monsters here!

Night Court (Tuesday Night, NBC)

It’s weird. This is a badly conceived show that rarely even makes me smile and yet it’s something that I find myself watching on Peacock whenever I’m bored and I don’t have time to watch anything that runs longer than 21 minutes. I don’t know why this is, because I really don’t care much for the show and it’s only gotten worse in its second season. I think the problem is that Abby Stone is way too naive to be a judge and her nonstop enthusiasm can be a bit hard to take. For instance, this week’s episode featured her still trying to get over breaking up with her boyfriend and obsessing over her inability to get a date. That story had comedic potential but seriously, Abby’s a judge. IN NEW YORK CITY! Toughen up!

Paternity Court (YouTube)

I watched an episode on Monday. Fortunately, the former army officer who had just returned from deployment was the father.

T and T (Tubi)

I wrote about T and T here!

Welcome Back, Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back, Kotter here!

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 3.27 “Invisible Maniac/September Song/Peekaboo”

Posted on January 24, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, The Love Boat has a very special passengers!

Episode 3.27 “Invisible Maniac/September Song/Peekaboo”

(Dir by George Tyne, originally aired on April 19th, 1980)

This week, the pop cultural stars align as a young David Hasselhoff boards the Love Boat!

Hasselhoff plays Tom Bell, a 20-something attorney who is dating a 30-something attorney named Cathy (Shelley Fabares). Cathy insists that they keep their romance a secret due to the age difference. She doesn’t want people to think that she’s a cradle robber or an older woman with a gigolo. (Cathy might also want to consider that she’s a senior partner at the firm while Tom is just a junior partner.) Tom doesn’t care about the age difference. In fact, he wants to marry Cathy!

And yes, they do eventually get married. Tom even has his grandparents waiting for them when the boat docks in Los Angeles so that they can act as witnesses. There’s not really any suspense as to whether or not Tom and Cathy will end up married because this is The Love Boat, the show that combined the swinging culture of the 70s with the morality of the 50s. The Hoff is his usual dramatic but self-aware self while Shelley Fabares is endlessly likable. They’re a cute couple and, minor age difference aside, they just look like they belong together. It was a sweet story.

As for the other passengers:

Fay Piermont (Peggy Cass) is married to Bill (Gordon Jump). Bill’s a nice guy but Fay fears that they’ve become a boring couple. She wants to be an exciting couple and she’s figured out that the way to do this is to get a makeover, buy a new wardrobe, and then toss her glasses and all of her frumpy clothes overboard. (At first, both Julie and Vicki are worried that Fay is planning on throwing herself overboard. One would think that would be cause for ship-wide alarm but Julie and Vicki just check on Fay occasionally to make sure she’s still alive.) At first, Bill is freaked out by Fay’s new attitude but, eventually, he comes to accept it and Fay comes to realize that she loves Bill, even if he is a bit reserved. This is the type of story that The Love Boat did frequently. Fay and Bill are a nice couple, even if they’re no Tom and Cathy.

Finally, Isaac is reunited with a former high school classmate, a model named Janet (BernNadette Stanis). Janet is upset that her husband (Clifton Davis) is more into sports than romance so she tries to make him jealous by lying about what a womanizer Isaac was in high school. Gopher overhears and tells Isaac that Janet referred to him as being “all hands” in high school. Now, most people would understand that Janet was just trying to make her husband jealous but Isaac somehow becomes convinced that he is a womanizer but he just can’t remember his actions because he suffers from dissociative identity disorder and he even goes to Doc Bricker for help! Why would Isaac believe that? It makes no sense that Isaac — cool, calm Isaac — would suddenly be so stupid. This is something that would happen to Gopher not Isaac.

That one silly storyline aside, this was a pleasant cruise on The Love Boat. I’m glad things worked out for Tom and Cathy. Seriously, the world is so lucky to have The Hoff.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 1/14/24 — 1/20/24

Posted on January 20, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

I am typing this post on a new laptop. Woo hoo!

Here’s a few thoughts on what I watched this week:

American Nightmare (Netflix)

This was a disturbing, 3-part docuseries about a woman who was kidnapped and raped and then put on trial by the police and the media, all of whom seemed to be determined to prove that she was a real life “gone girl.” This series was just infuriating to watch and everyone who nearly allowed Matthew Muller to get away with his crimes should be ashamed of themselves.

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)

I wrote about Baywatch Nights here!

Check It Out (Tubi)

I need to write a review about this week’s episode so I guess I better get on that.

CHiPs (Freevee)

I wrote about CHiPs here!

Couples Court With The Cutlers (YouTube)

On Friday, I watched an episode in which a man was concerned that his much younger girlfriend was cheating on him with another woman. She confessed, while being interrogated by a former military interrogator, that he was correct. The Cutlers were there to help this couple through the drama.

On Saturday, I discovered an entire YouTube channel dedicated to Couples Court so I probably won’t get anything accomplished for the first half of 2024.

Fantasy Island (YouTube)

I wrote about Fantasy Island here!

Friday the 13th: The Series (YouTube)

I wrote about Friday the 13th here!

Hell’s Kitchen (Thursday Night, FOX)

On Monday morning, as I shivered in the living room, I got caught up on Hell’s Kitchen and watched the first Black Jacket Service. What a disaster that turned out to be! I felt bad for Jonathan, who did not react well to Chef Ramsay taunting him about how much he drank before dinner service. Jonathan had a point, in that Ramsay really was kind of making it personal. At this point, I think the final two will be Ryan and Sammi. I’m Team Ryan all the way!

On Thursday, I cheered as Ryan and Sammi made it to the final three. I probably would have kept Carmen and sent Jonathan home but I can understand Ramsay’s logic. Jonathan had more experience than Carmen and Carmen did struggle early on in the season.

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I wrote about The Love Boat here!

Miami Vice (Tubi)

I wrote about Miami Vice here!

Maury (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched an episode with DNA results. All of the episodes of Maury to blend together, which I guess is the appeal of them. They demand very little on the part of the viewers.

Monsters (Tubi)

I wrote about Monsters here!

Night Court (Tuesday Night, NBC)

I was actually bored enough on Wednesday to watch the first four episodes of this show’s second season. While the ensemble seems to be gelling a bit better than they did during the first season, Night Court just isn’t that funny. Every joke sounds like it’s been sitting in some writer’s idea drawer since 2005.

Poochinski (YouTube)

I wrote about Poochinski here!

Steve Wilkos Show (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched an episode in which Steve talked to a pregnant 17 year-old. She thought her boyfriend was 25. It turned out he was 38! Needless to say, Steve kicked him off the stage while the audience chanted Steve’s name.

On Thursday, I watched an episode about threesomes that led to pregnancies. The audience loved it but Steve seemed to be disappointed by everyone on his stage.

T and T (Tubi)

I wrote about T and T here!

Welcome Back, Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back Kotter here!

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 3.26 “Vicki’s First Love/The High Cost of Living/Accident Prone”

Posted on January 17, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The Love Boat promises something for everyone!

Episode 3.26 “Vicki’s First Love/The High Cost of Loving/Accident Prone”

(Dir by George Tyne, originally aired on April 5th, 1980)

It’s not easy growing up on a cruise ship. That was one of the main takeaways that I took from this week’s episode of The Love Boat. Vicki is really excited when singer Mark Redding (Rex Smith) boards the ship. She has a huge crush on him and she even gets to give him a tour of the boat.

Of course, despite his teen idol status, Mark is an adult and famous and being pursued by almost every woman on the ship. Vicki feels insecure compared to the other women who are pursuing Mark. (Of course, those women are all in their 20s while Vicki is 12.) Eventually, Captain Stubing has one of his fatherly conversations with her and Vicki realizes that she doesn’t have to grow up quickly. It’s a simple storyline but it’s nicely performed by both Jill Whelan and Gavin MacLeod and, speaking as someone who wanted to be an adult when she was 12, I could relate to Vicki’s feelings. I was also glad that Mark turned out to be not a sleazy rock star, even if he was a bit superficial. The Love Boat is a place for romance, not debauchery.

As for the other two storylines, one featured Steve Kanaly as Mr. Massey, a wealthy man who is paying a former lover palimony. At his lawyer’s insistence, he boards the boat with a series of contracts. Before he get involved with any woman, he is supposed to get her to sign an agreement not to sue him for palimony. Needless to say, this does not make Massey’s romantic life easy. Finally, he decides to forget about the contract, just for his shipboard hook-up to present him with a contract of her own. Apparently, everyone’s scared of getting sued!

Speaking of getting sued, Tom Barry (Alan Feinstein) boards the boat with a broken leg and is shocked to discover that the bad driver responsible for the accident that injured him is on the boat as well! Karen (Britt Ekland) is a bit accident-prone but, despite the awkwardness of their first meeting, Tom and Karen fall in love. Tom even agrees to not sue her. Yay! I love a happy ending.

This was an enjoyable episode of The Love Boat. With the exception of Tom and Karen’ story, there really wasn’t much romance. There was just Vicki feeling insecure but coming to realize that she was just fine the way she was and then there was Mr. Massey trying to balance getting laid with remaining legally safe. But the Vicki storyline was sensitive and intelligent while the Mr. Massey storyline featured some nice comedic desperation from Steve Kanaly. Even Alan Feinstein and Britt Ekland had a really likable chemistry. All in all, this was a pleasant cruise.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 1/7/24 — 1/13/24

Posted on January 13, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

I’m sitting here as a cold front rolls through my town. The temperature is way below freezing and it will remain that way for at least the next three days. So, I look forward to hiding underneath a lot of blankets and watching a lot of TV between now and Thursday morning.

Here’s some thoughts on what I watched this week:

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)

I wrote about Baywatch Nights here!

Check It Out (Tubi)

My review of Check It Out will be dropping later tonight.

CHiPs (Freevee)

I wrote about CHiPs here!

Degrassi Junior High (YouTube)

My review of Degrassi Junior High will (finally) post tomorrow! Keep hope alive!

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

On Tuesday afternoon, I had a two-part episode of Dr. Phil on as background nose. Dr. Phil was talking to people who felt their sons and daughters had been brainwashed by a cult in Louisiana. And indeed, they had been. Cults are weird. I never know how to react to people who fall for that stuff.

Fantasy Island (YouTube)

I wrote about Fantasy Island here!

Friday the 13th (YouTube)

I wrote about Friday the 13th here!

Highway to Heaven (YouTube)

I wrote about Highway to Heaven here!

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I wrote about The Love Boat here!

Maury (YouTube)

On Friday, I used two paternity tests episodes of Maury for background noise while I was watching. I feel very disappointed in myself. On Saturday, I disappointed myself even further by watching an episode of Maury that featured lie detector tests.

Miami Vice (Tubi)

I wrote about Miami Vice here!

Monsters (Tubi)

I wrote about Monsters here!

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday, I watched an episode of this show from the 90s. It featured music video profiles of The Kinks and The Cure, along with a tour of Universal Studios.

Sally Jessy Raphael (YouTube)

I watched an episode of this ancient talk show on Thursday. Sally talked to kids who were being bullied and then confronted the bullies on the air. I felt bad for all of the bullied kids, except for the one who said being bulled made him hate America. If that’s how you feel, move.

On Friday, I watched an episode about women who could not forgive their men for cheating. I don’t blame them but I bet half of them ended up marrying the guy anyways.

Saved By The Bell (Sunday Morning, MeTV)

Casey Kasem hosted a dance contest and encouraged everyone to do the sprain. Jessie freaked out because a short guy wanted to date her. A new substitute teacher taught everyone to appreciate Shakespeare. Wow, this was a dumb but addictive show.

The Steve Wilkos Show (YouTube)

On Tuesday afternoon, I put on an episode of Steve Wilkos for background noise. Steve was screaming at a woman who he felt was an unfit mother. And who knows? Maybe she was an unfit mother. But Steve definitely came across as being a bully and his chanting audience didn’t help matters.

On Saturday morning, I watched an episode in which Wilkos threw several chairs across the stage while the crowd chanted, “Steve! Steve! Steve!”

T and T (Tubi)

I wrote about T and T here!

Turn-On! (YouTube)

I wrote about the second episode of Turn-On! here!

TV 2000 (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday night, I watched an episode of this old music video show. The episode was from 1985 and it featured a lot of good music, along with some slightly annoying hosts.

Welcome Back Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back, Kotter here!

Retro Television Reviews: The Love Boat 3.25 “Celebration/Captain Papa/Honeymoon Pressure”

Posted on January 10, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, an important question is finally answered!

Episode 3.25 “Celebration/Captain Papa/Honeymoon Pressure”

(Dir by Richard Kinon, originally aired on March 29th, 1980)

Ever since Vicki first came aboard the ship, I have been wondering how exactly a 12 year-old can live (and apparently work) on an ocean liner. One of my main questions has concerned how she is getting an education while sailing back and forth to Mexico.

With this episode, I finally got my answer. When social worker Susan Stoddard (Lois Nettleton) boards the ship to decide whether or not to recommend that the Captain be given custody of Vicki, one of the first question that she asks is about school.

“Chief Petty Officer Dooley has a master’s in education,” Stubing replies, before saying that this never-before-mentioned character served as Vicki’s tutor.

Well, I’m glad that’s been cleared up. Still, it is interesting that we’ve never before seen or even heard of this Dooley character. We don’t even see Dooley in this episode. You would think the social worker would want to talk to the person who is in charge of Vicki’s education. Instead, Susan sees the rest of the crew, all of whom try to be on their best behavior in order to convince her that the Love Boat is not the floating HR nightmare that we all know it is.

(Still, at least the crew tried. I’m surprised Doctor Bricker didn’t just try to sleep with her or something….)

This would be a really depressing episode of the Captain wasn’t awarded custody. Luckily, Susan is so impressed by the crew that she says she will definitely file a positive report. As she put it, Vicki not only has one wonderful parent. She has “Five wonderful parents!” Let’s see — Stubing, Julie, Gopher, Isaac, Doc …. yep, that’s five. I’m sure Chief Petty Officer Dooley appreciates being left out of the group.

Isaac has more to worry about than just Captain Stubing’s situation. Isaac is convinced that an old man named Gordon (Noah Beery, Jr.) is bank robber! Gordon, who works as a bank guard at the port, is sailing on the Love Boat with his wife of 30 years, Betty (Alice Faye). Gordon is spending a lot of money. Isaac worries that Gordon stole the money but actually, it turns out that Gordon is just spending his life savings because his wife is in poor health and he wants to make sure that she has a wonderful vacation. Unfortunately, Gordon spends too much on a diamond ring. His wife, realizing what Gordon has done, secretly exchanges the ring for a cheaper one and tells her husband that she doesn’t need a life of luxury. She just needs him. Awwwwwww! What a sweet old couple.

Finally, there are two real criminals on the boat. Ralph (Norman Alden) and Ben (Richard Bakalyan) are two mob enforces who have been sent to accompany the boss’s daughter (Eve Plumb) on her honeymoon with her un-connected husband, Mark (Sal Viscuso). Ralph and Ben’s presence makes Mark so uncomfortable that he can’t even consummate his marriage. Ralph and Ben try to make things romantic for the couple. Eventually, Doc Bricker tells the gangsters that Mark has a fictional disease, which causes Ralph and Ben to back off. The married couple finally gets to celebrate their honeymoon. But Mark still married into a mafia family so he’ll probably be machine-gunned as soon as he steps off the boat.

With the exception of the stupid Mafia story, this was a sweet episode. I’m glad things worked out for the old couple and for Vicki and the Captain. The Love Boat is not really a show that you watch for the acting but Gavin MacLeod’s natural sincerity always served him well whenever the show focused on his role as Vicki’s father. Plus, I no longer have to worry about whether or not Vicki is going to have more than a sixth grade education. So that’s a good thing.