Song of the Day: Wild Thing by The Troggs, featuring Oliver Reed


The late, great British actor Oliver Reed was born 87 years ago in London.  Reed was one of those actors who was so infamous for his often alcohol-fueled exploits off-screen that it was often overlooked that he was also a very talented man whose ability to create intriguing characters was appreciated by directors Ken Russell and whose powerful screen presence went far beyond his famously scarred face.  Oliver Reed was one of the actors considered for the role of James Bond after Sean Connery left the part.  With his physicality and his dangerous smile, Reed would have offered an intriguing take on the character.

A British cultural icon, Oliver Reed was someone who tended to show up in the least expected places.  In 1992, The Troggs rerecorded and rereleased their best-known song, Wild Thing.  Accompanying them in the recording was none other than Oliver Reed.  In honor of an actor who could do it all, here is today’s song of the day!

Wild thing, you make my heart sing
You make everything groovy, wild thing
Wild thing, I think I love you
But I wanna know for sure
Come on and hold me tight
I love you

Wild thing, you make my heart sing
You make everything groovy
Wild thing

Wild thing, I think you move me
But I wanna know for sure
Come on and hold me tight
You move me

Wild thing, you make my heart sing
You make everything groovy, wild thing
C’mon, c’mon, wild thing
Check it, check it, wild thing

Songwriters: Matt Dike / Marvin Young / Anthony Terrell Smith

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Monsters 3.9 “The Young and the Headless”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing Monsters, which aired in syndication from 1988 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on YouTube.

This week, Monsters loses its head of another series.

Episode 3.9 “The Young and the Headless”

(Dir by Tom Abrams, originally aired on November 25th, 1990)

As you can tell from the title, this episode of Monsters is meant to be a parody of soap operas.  Two scientists, Victoria (Karen Valentine) and Edward (George Reinhardt), have been have been married ever since Victoria’s lunkhead ex-boyfriend, Hunk (John Schiappa), disappeared while on a soldier of fortune mission.  However, when Hunk suddenly returns, Victoria and George are left with a dilemma, especially after Edward tricks Hunk into killing himself and then removes his head.

Victoria and George decide to reanimate the headless Hunk, bringing him back to life with microchips.  (Sure, why not?)  They treat the headless Hunk as a servant but it turns out that Hunk doesn’t need a brain to get his revenge.

The plot was nonsense but the episode did have good performances and a memorable monster in headless Hunk.  I think the main problem is that the episode tried very hard to parody the soap opera genre but, since most soap operas are already self-parodies that cheerfully embrace the melodrama and make no attempt to pretend to be realistic, a lot of the humor fell flat.  It’s hard to make fun of a genre that is, for the most part, defined by its self-awareness.

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 5.17 “The Return of the Captain’s Lady/Love Ain’t Illegal/The Irresistible Man”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

It’s time for another trip on The Love Boat!  We’re a little late setting sail today but it happens.  Let’s see what’s happening on this cruise….

Episode 5.17 “The Return of the Captain’s Lady/Love Ain’t Illegal/The Irresistible Man”

(Dir by Howard Morris, originally aired on February 6th, 1982)

This week’s cruise is all about people being stupid.

For instance, George Boggs (Dick Martin) wants to embezzle some money from his company but he can’t run the risk of his business partner, Irwin (Robert Mandan), finding out.  So, George tells his secretary, Marge (Phyllis Davis), to keep Irwin distracted while George steals the money.  However, Marge really does fall for Irwin.  This was a very predictable storyline and it suffered from Dick Martin continually mugging for the camera and acting so obviously guilty that there was no way that the entire world wouldn’t have noticed what he was doing.  Still, if you’re a fan of sitcoms from the 70s and 80s, it’s always interesting to see Robert Mandan playing a sympathetic character for a change.

Things get even dumber when Doug Bridges (Linwood Boomer) decides that the best way to get Pam (Lydia Cornell) to notice him would be to fake being pulled into a broom closet and kissed by an amorous woman who then, in Doug’s telling of the story, runs off and disappears.  Soon, the entire ship is looking for Doug’s mystery woman.  Why this would get Pam to like Doug, I’m not sure.  Pam’s best friend (Pat Klous) does like Doug so she pretends to be the mystery woman.  Of course, Doug can’t reveal that she’s lying because that would mean revealing that he was lying and …. as I said, this story was dumb.  Dumb, dumb, dumb!

Finally, Captain Stubing’s ex-fiancé, Linda (Pat Crowley) boards the ship and the Captain is super excited!  He starts to rekindle their relationship and soon, he’s even thinking of proposing.  Yay!  Vicki’s finally going to have a stepmom …. oh wait.  Hold on.  It turns out that Linda’s married and she just boarded the boat and allowed herself to be romanced by the Captain without telling him any of this because …. reasons, I guess?  I mean, don’t get me wrong.  Linda is not happy with her marriage and is in the process of getting a divorce but she doesn’t tell any of that to the Captain.  Merrill thinks that Linda is single and ready to get married.  Nope, Linda was just looking for a fling and is not ready to get married again.  Poor Merrill!  At least he has the crew looking out for him….

Ugh.  This episode.  Listen, I am more than willing to suspend my disbelief when it comes to this show.  Usually, I absolutely love The Love Boat.  But usually there’s at least one sort of funny or sweet story to go along with the ones that are less memorable.  None of the stories worked on this cruise and that’s a shame.  That said, I’ll be back next week.  The Love Boat promises something for everyone, afterall.

SHANE (The TV Series) – Episode 7: Day of the Hawk (originally aired October 22nd, 1966)


Episode 7 begins with two drunk cowboys, who work for Rufe Ryker (Bert Freed), raising cane and deciding they’ll go harass some sodbusters just for the hell of it. On this day, they ride over to Ira Jackson’s (Jason Wingreen) ranch, where Marian Starett (Jill Ireland) is there visiting Ira’s daughter Elizabeth (Catherine Ferrar). As the cowboys ride around the house, hooping and hollering and shooting off their guns, a frustrated Ira opens the door and fires a blast from his shotgun. The cowboys shoot back toward the house, hitting a kerosene lamp in the kitchen and starting a fire. Ira gets the ladies out of the house and then commences to fighting with the cowboys, who now realize what they’ve done and are wanting to help put out the fire. While the men and Marian are distracted with the fight, Elizabeth runs back into the house to try to save her calico cat, where she is engulfed by the flames and dies. 

We move on to Elizabeth’s funeral and see Shane (David Carradine) ride up with Reverend Harry Himber (James Whitmore). Rufe Ryker is there and he tells Shane and the Reverend that he’s sorry about what happened, that he had nothing to do with it, and that he doesn’t want any trouble. Shane isn’t in much mood to listen to Ryker so he moves on. Reverend Himber, who we will come to find out is a pacifist, begins the service by saying that Elizabeth would want everyone there to remember the good times they had together with her, as well as look inward to find forgiveness and understanding. Hellbent on revenge, Ira just screams “No!”

That night, after chewing his two cowhands out, Ryker decides he’s going to pay them two months wages and send them out of town. He would rather lose a couple of good cowboys as fight a war with Ira. As one of the men, the young Hoke (Dee Pollock), is on his way out of town, Ira shoots him down from the hillside with his rifle. The remainder of the episode consists of Shane and Tom Starett (Tom Tully) trying to protect Ira and the other local farmers from the wrath of Ryker and his men, while Reverend Himber tries to get everyone to talk it out to avoid more killings in the valley. 

In episode 7, the character of Rufe Ryker takes center stage, along with Shane and the visiting Reverend Himber, played here by guest star James Whitmore in an incredible performance. This is probably the deepest episode we’ve dealt with thus far, with each character showing some level of moral complexity. Neither Shane or Ryker want a fight, but they both prepare to get bloody for different reasons. Ryker makes it clear that he will protect his men and fight for them even when they’re wrong. Shane makes it clear that he will fight for the sodbusters against powerful men like Ryker even when he thinks they’re wrong. And then there’s Reverend Himber, the pacifist who is willing to do whatever it takes to stop a fight. During the episode we find out that he had been forced to kill six enemy soldiers when they raided the hospital he was working at during the war. This episode drives home the fact that a man’s ideals will at times contrast harshly with the realities of the positions they find themselves in. Each of these three men finds himself in a situation that has grown bigger than him, with both Ryker and Shane recognizing the deal and preparing for the worst. Reverend Himber, on the other hand, tries to take control of the situation, only to be the catalyst for more tragedy. We have all been in situations where we hope for the best, but we’re smart enough to prepare for the worst, because some of the biggest fools alive are the ones who think they can control other people. 

Overall, the “Day of the Hawk” is a strong episode that has a surprisingly powerful and emotional conclusion. The storyline belongs to Shane, Ryker and the Reverend, so Shane’s relationship with Marian takes a back seat this time around. I don’t think they look at each other longingly a single time, which did make me a little sad. Here’s hoping they’ll double that up in Episode 8! 

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 1.6 “Takedown”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

Who cares?  Roll the opening credits.

Episode 1.6 “Takedown”

(Dir by Terrence O’Hara, originally aired on April 6th, 1996)

Three dangerous criminals are holding up stores in …. oh Hell.  Where does this show take place?  I know it’s in California but what’s the name of the town?  Malibu?  Is that it?  Hold on, let me check with Wikipedia….

SANTA MONICA!  That’s where this show takes place.

See, that’s the type of show that Pacific Blue is.  I am now six episodes into this show and I’m still can’t tell you where it specifically takes place.  It’s not that they haven’t mentioned that the show is set in Santa Monica.  And considering that I even attended Saint Monica School for a semester, you would think that I would be able to remember it.  But Pacific Blue is such a generic show that it’s difficult to really remember a thing about it.  It fades from your memory within seconds of being watched.  About the only thing that really sticks with the viewer about this show is how stupid everyone looks on their bicycles with their tight white shirts and their blue shorts.  The fact that Rick Rossovich plays their leader with a perpetual air of grim determination only serves to make them seem even more ridiculous.  Cops are supposed to look intimidating.  That’s one reason why a lot of people don’t like them.  These cops just look like the type of douchebags you dread getting stuck behind in traffic.

As for this episode, three dangerous criminals are holding up stores in Santa Monica.  Somehow, they always manage to escape right before the cops show up.  Maybe that’s because the cops are all on bicycles and they have to steer across crowded sidewalks without even having the benefit of a siren to tell people to get out of the way.  What’s odd is that no one ever seems to notice the criminals until they pull out their guns.  These are three extremely scruffy criminals, all of whom are clad in clothes that don’t appear to have been washed in days.  Are you seriously telling me no one would notice that on the beach in San Diego or wherever this freaking show takes place?

If I was a store owner who got robbed at gunsight and who then called the police, nothing would piss me off more than having the bicycle cops respond.  Seriously, you need a car to chase criminals!  All the criminals have to do is wait for the bike cops to pull a muscle or ride over a stick in the middle of the road and then they’ll be home free.  If I get robbed, give me the real cops!

TC gets upset when one of the criminals points a gun at him.  Lt. Palermo encourages him to stop being stoic and get in touch with his feelings and …. oh, who cares?  Freaking bicycle cops.  While that’s going on, Chris takes a creative writing class and dates her professor (Zach Galligan).  From what we hear of Chris’s literary efforts, she has no talent whatsoever.  She was such a bad writer that I literally got angry while she reading her story.  I wanted the professor to throw something at her.  Also, Victor del Toro falls in love with a model (Krista Allen) and even gets a date with her, despite his dumbass bicycle.

Where does this show take place again?  Malibu?

Anyway, this was just another episode about the most useless cops ever.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 6.5 “Everybody Goes to Gilley’s/Face of Fire”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites.  Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week, Fantasy Island goes country.

Episode 6.5 “Everybody Goes to Gilley’s/Face of Fire”

(Dir by Jerome Courtland, originally aired on November 20th, 1982)

Mickey Gilley is a country-western singer who comes to Fantasy Island because he wants to finally become a star after years of struggling.  Tattoo, who is a huge country music fan, puts on a cowboy hat and decides that he’ll be Gilley’s “exclusive manager.”  Not so fast, Mr. Roarke says.  Apparently, there’s a country-western bar on the other side of the Island and the owner, Mr. Sherwood (Dennis Cole), has a fantasy of finally having a successful bar.  Roarke arranges for Gilley and Sherwood to become partners.  Gilley is a star whenever he performs in Sherwood’s bar.  In the end, Sherwood and Gilley leave the Island together with Sherwood as Gilley’s new manager.

I’m not a huge country music fan so I have to admit that, until I watched this episode, I had no idea who Mickey Gilley was. (In fact, in my first draft of this review, I repeatedly called him “Dennis Gilley,” so that tells you how much I know about county-western singers.)  Gilley actually was a country music star, one who did spend several years toiling away in small clubs before he finally found success.  This role was autobiographical for him.  It’s a bit odd that he plays himself but maybe he was a big deal in 1982.  As I said, country music is not my area of expertise and 1982 is a bit before my time.  What I can say is that, on the show, Gilley was portrayed in a way that kind of made him seem like a jerk.  I mean, the nonstop complaining and all the demands!  “I’m not here for romance,” he tells Roarke at one point.  Don’t tell Mr. Roarke how to do his job, Gilley!

The other storyline was a take on Jane Eyre.  Jean Harrigan (Lynn Redgrave) is from Nevada, despite being totally English.  She needs a million dollars.  A mysterious rich guy (David Hedison) offers it to her if she can survive a weekend at his home.  His crazy wife is locked away in a bedroom.  She ends up catching on fire towards the end of the episode, freeing things up for Jean and the rich guy.  What’s interesting is that the rich guy says that he originally met Jean when his car broke down in the Nevada desert and Jean gave him a ride.  What’s interesting about this is that, when the legendary Howard Hughes died, a man named Melvin Dummar claimed that he had once given Hughes a ride after coming across him stranded in the Nevada desert and, in return, Hughes left him a good deal of his fortune.  Dummar even produced a will in support of his claim.  The courts ruled the will to have been a forgery and Dummar never received his money, though there still are people out there who defend “the Dummar will” and claims that he was telling the truth about meeting Hughes.  Fortunately, Jean does get her money and a chance to spend some time with the totally charming and handsome David Hedison.

(Hedison was also the best Felix Leiter, appearing in Live and Let Die and License to Kill.)

Perhaps not surprisingly, I preferred the gothic story to the country music story.  I appreciated that Tattoo got to do something this episode.  The scene where he declares himself to be Gilley’s manager felt like a throwback to the show’s earlier seasons.  This journey to the Island was a mixed bag for me, though overall it was a pleasant trip.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 3.8 “Hot Wheels”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

Last night’s review of CHiPs was pre-empted by a sudden storm.  Here it is now, in its entirety,

Episode 3.8 “Hot Wheels”

(Dir by John Florea, originally aired on November 3rd, 1979)

Ponch is still in the hospital, recovering from last week’s accident.  Still, because he’s Ponch, he’s the one who figures out that a bunch of disgruntled fireman are using city trucks to commit their jewelry thefts.  Hey, wait a minute.  Last week’s episode was also about jewelry thefts.  Admittedly, CHiPs was a show that tended to recycle plots but, even by CHiPs standards, this is one of those coincidences that leaves you wondering what exactly was going on in the writer’s room.

Actually, it’s easy to guess.  Erik Estrada really was injured while filming an episode.  The cast that he wears throughout this episode was real and, as easy as it can be to make fun of his overexpressive acting and his tendency to lose his shirt every other scene, you do have to respect that Estrada showed to film this episode at all.  With Estrada injured, one gets the feeling that this episode, just like last week’s, was quickly rewritten to cover the situation.

Baker gets a temporary partner in this episode.  It’s the return of his former motorcycle mate, John Clayton!  Clayton was apparently Baker’s partner before Ponch.  Clayton has a reputation for being a practical joker,  It’s all anyone can talk about.  Clayton is a legendary prankster!  They really want us to know that Clayton’s a fun guy before he shows up and we discover that he’s played by Andrew Robinson, the actor who is best-known for playing the Scorpio Killer in Dirty Harry.  Robinson wears a mustache as Clayton, probably in an attempt to keep 1979 audiences from looking at the screen and going, “Hey, I remember that guy hijacking a school bus!”

(I should mention that Andrew Robinson himself was a committed pacifist when he filmed Dirty Harry, to the extent that he actually flinched whenever he had to shoot the killer’s gun and he actually traumatized himself while filming the school bus hijack.  He actually sounds like a pretty nice guy who just happened to play one of the most loathsome screen villains of all time.)

Baker works with Clayton and it must be said that Larry Wilcox does seem to be noticeably happier when he’s acting opposite Robinson than he ever did when he was acting opposite Estrada.  The episode features Clayton performing a heroic and dangerous rescue at one point and it’s easy to see that that scene was originally conceived with Estrada in mind.  It’s also easy to imagine Estrada flashing his big grin at the end of the scene while Robinson, on the other hand, plays up the fact that anyone, even a dedicated cop, would be absolutely exhausted after all that.

Robinson does a good job as Clayton and it’s always fun to see Martin Kove play a villain on show like this.  This was a good episode.  Estrada, I assume, will be back on his bike next week.

Music Video of the Day: Weight of Desire by Tennis (2025, dir by BLDG Blossom Liu and Danny Gray)


Today’s music video of the day has a weird vibe that I like.  Watching  it, I found myself thinking about those weird cults that would form communes in the wild and everyone would have the same hairstyle and every night would end with a sing along around the campfire.  Admittedly, I’m not sure if these cults actually exist but I always imagine they’re out there somewhere.  Personally, I would dread running into them.

Enjoy!