Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 3.3 “Two Balls And A Strike”

Posted on December 5, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988. The show can be found on Daily Motion.

This week, the nurses go on strike. Fire all of them!, I say.

Episode 3.3 “Two Balls and a Strike”

(Dir by David Anspaugh, originally aired on October 3rd, 1984)

It’s another depressing few days at St. Eligius.

When negotiations break down, all of the nurses — except for Shirley Daniels — go on strike. Led by Nurse Rosenthal, they march out of the hospital and join a picket line in the rain. Triumphant music plays on the soundtrack Rosenthal gets on her bullhorn and announces that anyone making deliveries to the hospital will be crossing the picket line and not showing solidarity with the union. Honestly, though? Screw the union. It’s a hospital! It needs supplies. There are people dying inside of that building and they’re not even going to have the dignity of clean linen because of Nurse Rosenthal and her stupid union. And another thing …. Rosenthal is the head of union at St. Eligius. So, why isn’t she marching in the rain and carrying a sign? Why does she get to stand in the doorway and shout at people? Get out there and suffer for your union, you British commie!

Obviously, the show wanted me to be inspired by Rosenthal and the union. Whenever it switched over to the picket line, triumphant music started playing. I’m with Nurse Daniels on this one, though. Daniels didn’t vote the union so why should she have to suffer in the rain? She stays on the job. “Good luck,” Rosenthal tells her, “you’ll need it.” And all I can say to that is that at least Shirley Daniels isn’t deserting the hospital’s patients.

While the nurses are on strike, Dr. Canavero is attacked by a hulking man wearing a ski mask. Canavero is able to fight him off. Westphall and everyone else at the hospital immediately assumes that the man was Peter White but Peter has an alibi. He was in radiology when Canavero was attacked. So, is there a new ski mask rapist haunting the hospital? The first ski mask rapist storyline was pretty disturbing, especially since Peter got away with it. I’m not sure I want to go through a second one.

Dr. Craig and Ellen went to couples therapy. As usual, Dr. Craig got annoyed with the whole thing. There’s really nothing more fun than watching Dr. Craig get annoyed. No one gets annoyed better than William Daniels. Still, it seemed to do Dr. Craig and Ellen some good, with Ellen making plans to go to Hawaii and Dr. Craig acknowledging that he’s not always the easiest person to deal with.

As for Dr. Westphall …. he spent most of this episode depressed. Westphall is always depressed.

This is my final St. Elsewhere review for 2025. Retro Television Review is taking a break for the holidays, so I can focus on Awards Season and Christmas movies! St. Elsewhere will return on January 9th.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 4.1 “Contempt of Court”

Posted on April 21, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, the fourth season begins with a whimper.

Episode 4.1 “Contempt of Court”

(Dir by Jan Eliasberg, originally aired on September 25th, 1987)

It’s time for season 4! Crockett has longer hair! Tubbs has a beard! Otherwise, they’re still somehow doing the undercover thing, despite making no effort to maintain their undercover identities. This episode finds them both in court and, later on, pulling their guns on a mob boss in broad daylight. How exactly there is anybody in Miami who does not know that Burnett and Cooper are actually Crockett and Tubbs, I do not know.

This was kind of a boring episode, which does not bode well for the rest of the fourth season. Mob boss Frank Mosca (Stanley Tucci) is on trial but, because the case hinges on information supplied by an informant, Crockett is faced with making the decision about whether or not to name Jack Rivers (Steven Keats) as the informer. For Jack’s own safety, Crockett refuses but Mosca figures it out anyway. Jack is stabbed to death while a helpless Crockett watches. (Crockett’s in jail on a contempt of court charge.) Later, Jack’s teenage son, Terry (Richard Panebianco), tells Crockett, “I had no idea you were a cop.” Really? What a stupid kid.

Anyway, after Mosca frames a juror for taking bribes and a mistrial is declared, Terry pulls a gun on Mosca as he and his men are walking out of the courthouse. For once, Crockett and Tubbs are able to convince someone not to open fire. I think this is the first time, in Miami Vice history, that Crockett and Tubbs have managed to prevent an assassination. Still, Terry does fire his gun in the air. Mosca smirks and leaves. What’s weird is that no one else reacts to Terry shooting he gun. I mean, he’s on the steps of the courthouse. Why are there no guards rushing out? Why are Crockett and Tubbs the only cops around? Seriously, it makes absolutely no sense.

This episode had some worthy guest stars. Stanley Tucci appeared to be having fun as the cartoonishly evil Mosca. Meg Foster played the district attorney. Philip Baker Hall was the judged who ordered Crockett to name the informant. That said, the episode itself got bogged down in all of the legal wrangling going on inside the courtroom. For the past three seasons, Miami Vice is a downbeat cop show, not a show about lawyers objecting and debating the point of law. The fourth season premiere felt off.

I’ve read bad things about this upcoming season and this episode did little to generate any feeling of optimism or hope. Both Don Johnson and Philip Michael Thomas looked bored and even Edward James Olmos’s Castillo is starting to get a little …. I guess annoying would be the world. Seriously, make eye contact with someone!

Well, we’ve got a long season ahead of us. Let’s hope for the best.

INDICTMENT: THE MCMARTIN TRIAL (1995)

Posted on April 18, 2025 by Bradley Crain

Actor James Woods is great at portraying attorneys. Whether it be as the real life Assistant D.A. Bob Tanenbaum in the excellent T.V. Movie BADGE OF THE ASSASSIN (1985), the crusading hippie Eddie Dodd in TRUE BELIEVER (1989) or the namesake of the excellent TV series SHARK (2006-2008), Woods knows how to play that unique combination of intelligence, shrewdness, and sneakiness to perfection. In 1995, he further applied those skills when he portrayed real life attorney Danny Davis in the HBO movie INDICTMENT: THE MCMARTIN TRIAL. This movie is based on the McMartin day care sexual abuse case that began with horrific allegations in 1983 and ended in 1990 with zero convictions and all charges dropped. During that time, the McMartin Trial became the longest and most expensive series of criminal trials in American history.

I’ll just go ahead and challenge any person to watch INDICTMENT: THE MCMARTIN TRIAL and not get filled with righteous anger about the complete failure of our judicial system. Add to that failure the complete breakdown of our media to cover events in a fair and impartial fashion with even the smallest shred of objectivity. Does any of this sound familiar? As good as James Woods is in the central role, the star of this film is the true story itself. We watch as various people in positions of authority and power act completely out of self interest, including Davis himself at first, with the pursuit of the truth or justice not even the slightest consideration no matter what the evidence suggests. In actuality, the truth was hidden by the prosecution in pursuit of convictions that never came. The shit that this family was put through with coerced evidence that had no chance of standing up to the slightest bit of scrutiny is disgraceful. It’s one of the most infuriating films I’ve ever seen and it’s just as relevant in 2025 as it was in 1995. The performances are spot on, beginning with Woods’ central performance as Danny Davis and moving on to Shirley Knight in a Golden Globe winning portrayal of Peggy McMartin Buckey, Mercedes Ruehl as prosecutor Lael Rubin, Lolita Davidovich as child therapist Kee MacFarlane, Sada Thompson as matriarch Virginia McMartin, and Henry Thomas as the odd but innocent Ray Buckey. Produced by Oliver Stone and directed by Mick Jackson (THE BODYGUARD, VOLCANO), this button pushing, thought provoking film would win both the Primetime Emmy and Golden Globe awards for best Made for Television Movie in 1995. It’s truly an excellent film and should be seen by any person interested in a fair judicial system or unbiased media.

Insomnia File No. 2: Stag (dir by Gavin Wilding)

Posted on August 16, 2015 by Lisa Marie Bowman

What’s an Insomnia File? You know how some times you just can’t get any sleep and, at about three in the morning, you’ll find yourself watching whatever you can find on cable? This feature is all about those insomnia-inspired discoveries!

Last night, if you were suffering from insomnia around 2:30 in the morning, you could have turned over to Flix and watched Stag, a dreary film from 1997!

And I know what you’re saying. “Really, Lisa? I could have watched a dreary film! WHY DIDN’T SOMEBODY TELL ME!?” Well, sorry. Your loss. Maybe next time you won’t be so quick to resist the call of insomnia…

Anyway, Stag eventually turns out to be pretty bad but it actually has a pretty good opening. A bunch of rich guys get together in a big house and throw a bachelor party. Whenever one of them first appears on screen, they get a freeze frame that tells us their name and gives us a few biographical facts.

For instance, one coke-snorting character is introduced as “Jon DiCapri: Soap opera star, spokesman for “Stars Against Drugs.” A drunk guy begging for money is identified as “Timan Bernard: Accountant, Author of ‘Ethics in Business.'” The pensive fellow standing by the window and a smoking a cigarette is “Daniel Kane: Gulf war veteran, post traumatic stress disorder,” while the guy running around in a wig and lingerie is “Ed Labenski: Contractor, church treasurer.” My personal favorite of the introductions belonged to the guy with the neck tattoo and the terrible teeth. We’re told that he’s “Pete Weber: Drug dealer, extortionist. Self employed.”

Of course, Pete Weber is also Andrew McCarthy, playing a character who is far removed from the world of Pretty In Pink and St. Elmo’s Fire. And Daniel Kane is actually Kevin Dillon, taking part in the type of misogynistic hi-jinks that would later be celebrated in Entourage. Jon DiCapri is actually William McNamara, who will always be remembered for his memorable death scene in Dario Argento’s Opera. As for Timan Bernard, he’s played by John Henson, who was the host of that terrible Wipeout show that was on the air forever despite the fact that nobody in the world would admit to watching it.

And they’re not the only ones at this bachelor party! The bachelor himself is played by John Stockwell, the director of movies like Cheaters, Crazy/Beautiful and In The Blood. His best friend is played by Mario Van Peebles. Even distinguished character actor Ben Gazzarra is at this bachelor party!

As I said, the film starts out well enough, with the men all acting like idiots and pretty much confirming everything that I’ve always suspected about bachelor parties. But then the strippers show up and there’s a highly improbable accident and soon there are two dead bodies bleeding out on the linoleum floor of John Stockwell’s house. The rest of the movie is pretty much the men yelling at each other and arguing about what they should do. Some fear going to jail. Some want to frame someone else. Some want to cover up the accident. A few suggest calling the police but then Andrew McCarthy rips the landline phone out of the wall and, since this movie was made in the 90s, that is literally all he has to do to keep everyone from contacting the outside world.

Despite some decent performances, the film turned out to be pretty tedious. That said, as I watched it, I found myself wondering how my girlfriends and I would have handled a similar situation. What if we were throwing a bachelorette party and suddenly Magic Mike ended up lying in the middle of the floor with a broken neck? To be honest, I get the feeling we’d probably handle it in roughly the same way as the characters in Stag. We would just be a lot more passive aggressive about it.

“Oh my God, is that guy dead!?”

“I don’t know but that’s what I think Heather said. But it’s all Amy’s fault and … Bitch, everyone says it’s your fault so unless everyone in the entire world is wrong … whatever, Amy.”

“Oh my God, what are we going to do with him?”

“I don’t know but Vanessa said that maybe we should say that he like never showed up at the party and then she said that Jen said that … oh my God, are those new earrings!?”

“Yeah, do you like them!?”

“They’re so pretty! Anyway, Jen said that maybe you should like go bury him somewhere…”

“Oh my God, Jen said I should go bury him!?”

“Well, I didn’t hear for sure but Tina said that she heard Vanessa say that Jen said that you should go bury him…”

“That bitch! I am so going to kick her ass! Oh my God!”

But anyway, the body would eventually get buried. Just not by me.

ANYWAY! What was I talking about?

Right … Stag.

It’s not a very good movie.