Retro Television Reviews: City Guys 5.23 “Prom-Lems” and 5.24 “Goodbye Manny High”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing City Guys, which ran on NBC from 1997 to 2001.  Almost the entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

It’s taken nearly a year but we’re almost done with City Guys!  This week, it’s time for the last prom and graduation!

Episode 5.23 “Prom-Lems”

(Dir by Frank Bonner, originally aired on December 1st, 2001)

It’s time for the last prom of the graduating class of Manny High!  Al and Dawn decide that, even though they are broken up, they will still go to the prom together.  L-Train and Jamal try to show their dates a wonderful night but first the limo they ordered cancels and then L-Train fails to make the reservations for dinner at Tavern in the Green.  Not surprisingly, their dates are a bit less than impressed with the idea of having jambalaya at the Manhattan Diner.  Meanwhile, Ms. Noble won’t stop going on about how she doesn’t have anyone to go to prom with because her husband is out of town.  Ms. Noble, once again …. YOU’RE THE PRINCIPAL!  PROM IS NOT ABOUT YOU!  Anyway, Ms. Noble’s husband does come back home in time to take her to prom so, fortunately, everyone is spared from having to listen to Ms. Noble whine about it.

The majority of the episode focuses on Chris and Cassidy.  Chris and Cassidy should be happy because they’re named Prom King and Queen but there’s an issue that could have easily been resolved by everyone not being an idiot and not jumping to conclusions.  When Cassidy learns that Chris is going to give her a ring at prom, she thinks that Chris is not only going to ask her to marry him but that he is also pressure her to go to Duke with him and leave behind her plans of attending Cal Arts.  But, it turns out that Chris just wanted to give her a ring because it seemed like a romantic thing to do.  This is another one of those issues that could have been resolved by Cassidy just asking Chris about the ring.

Every high school show produced by Peter Engel featured a “final prom” episode and, by that time City Guys got around to it, the show and its writers were obviously just going through the motions.  It’s a pretty boring prom, to be honest.  It’s nowhere near as touching as the California Dreams playing their final gig or Jessie and Slater sharing one last dance.  It’s just another night at Manny High.

(Why were teenagers in Peter Engel sitcoms always applying to Duke?)

Episode 5.24 “Goodbye Manny High”

(Dir by Frank Bonner, originally aired on December 8th, 2001)

Graduation is approaching but life at Manny High is still as pointlessly complicated as ever.

For instance, Dawn has been entrusted with ordering the school’s diplomas.  Why would that be Dawn’s job?  Shouldn’t that be Ms. Noble’s job or maybe the job of the school district?  Well, needless to say, Dawn screws up and ends up getting a bunch of diplomas that were supposed to go to a private school in Canada.  Al, however, says that his cousin can get them some new diplomas before Ms. Noble ever finds out.  Again …. WHY ARE STUDENTS IN CHARGE OF THIS!?  Here’s the thing with diplomas.  They’re kind of important.  You don’t just hand out homemade diplomas.  When the students of Manny High are applying for their first post-High School jobs, I can only imagine how their potential employers are going to react to being handed a home-made diploma.

Meanwhile, Chris and Jamal have to figure out the best way to end their stupid radio show.  Even after Chris puts on a turban and speaks in a fake Indian accent (and yes, it is all incredibly cringey), Chris cannot figure out how he and Jamal should say goodbye to Manny High.

But the biggest problem might be L-Train’s!  After being held back three times, L-Train is excited because he’s finally going to graduate.  Except …. he’s not!  He’s short one credit and there’s no way he can make up that credit in just four days so it looks like the Bayside Gang is going to have to figure out a way to help Zack graduate.  Oh wait, I’m sorry.  I got confused as to which Peter Engel-produced show’s graduation episode I was reviewing.  It’s understandable as the exact same thing that happens to L-Train also happened to Zack Morris at the end of Saved By The Bell.  It’s almost as if Peter Engel’s stable of writers had collectively given up on coming up with new ideas during the final two seasons of City Guys.

Anyway, just as how the Saved By The Bell girls totally ruined their final ballet performance so Zack could get his final credit, Cassidy decides to put on a one-act play, starring L-Train.  The play is called For Girls Only and, of course, it requires that L-Train put on a wig and speak in a slightly higher voice.  The school board is impressed with the play and gives L-Train his elective credit.  L-Train graduates!  L-Train thanks Ms. Noble for helping him to go from being a bully to being a high school graduate and, as was so often the case with this show, Steven Daniel’s sweet sincerity makes the scene work, despite the somewhat overwritten dialogue.

As for the other storylines, Chris and Jamal end their final show by announcing, “Goodbye, Manny High!”  The fake diplomas arrive just in time for graduation.  Everyone puts on their red robes and, after five long and punishing seasons, they receive their diplomas.  The camera glides through Manny High’s empty hallways and we hear dialogue from past episodes.  For all the silliness of this episode and the show in general, these final moments were kind of touching, if just because it reminded me of my own feelings when I graduated high school.  Plus, an empty school hallway always feels like the perfect way to wrap up any show about high school.

Yay, it’s over!  City Guys is over!

Except it’s not.  There’s still more two episodes to go.  We’ll get to them next week and then, City Guys will finally be over.

Retro Television Reviews: The Love Boat 3.1 and 3.2 “The Alaskan Wedding Cruise: Carol and Doug’s Story/Peter and Alicia’s Story/Julie’s Story/Buddy and Portia’s Story”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

The Love Boat sets sail for season 3!

Episode 3.1 and 3.2 “The Alaskan Wedding Cruise: Carol and Doug’s Story/Peter and Alicia’s Story/Julie’s Story/Buddy and Portia’s Story”

(Dir by Roger Duchowny, originally aired on September 15th, 1979)

The third season of The Love Boat starts with a special voyage to Alaska and a two-hour running time.  It’s double the guest stars, double the melodrama, double the goofiness, and double the romance!  The opening also features new clips for Doc, Gopher, and Julie.  Whereas the first two seasons introduced Doc listening to his own heartbeat, the third season opening features him laughing while leaning against a railing.  Gopher’s new opening credit features him looking wistfully out at the ocean and it’s a much more mature look for him.  As for Julie, she’s still smiling and perky but she’s let her hair grow out.  If the first two seasons of The Love Boat featured Julie looking like the star of the high school drama department, she looks more like the most popular cheerleader now.  As for the Captain, he continues to salute the camera and Isaac continues to do his signature pointing.

The episode opens in Canada. The boat is docked in Vancouver, where it has been rented out by a huge and wealthy wedding party.  The boat will be sailing to Alaska.  Isaac has been reading everything that he can find about Alaska and he spends most of the episode sharing trivia about the state’s history.  Gopher, preparing for Alaska’s cold weather, buys a gigantic coat.  Meanwhile, Doc Bricker makes jokes about his ex-wives and Capt. Stubing tries to keep everything professional.  (“You’re not going to the North Pole!” he snaps at Gopher when he sees the size of his new fur coat.)

As for Julie, her mind is elsewhere.  Alaska is where Jack (Tony Roberts) lives.  Who is Jack?  During the second season, he was a passenger who fell in love with Julie and who asked Julie to marry him.  She knows that she’s going to see Jack in Alaska and she’s going to give him an answer as far as his proposal is concerned.  (If you don’t remember Jack asking Julie to marry him, don’t feel bad.  I had forgotten about it, too.  Fortunately, the first hour of this episode is full of flashbacks to Jack’s previous episode.)  Is Julie ready to settle down?  While Julie tries to make up her mind, she also has to deal with the romantic intentions of the wedding party’s dorky best man (Donny Most).

As for the wedding party, Carol (Lisa Hartman) and Doug (Mark Harmon, sporting a truly unfortunate haircut) are looking forward to getting married, even though Doug’s ex-girlfriend (Caren Kaye) is also on the boat and determined to win Doug back.  If that means jumping out a cake while wearing a bikini, she’ll do it.  Doug is more concerned about the fact that his estranged, alcoholic father, Peter (Ray Milland) had turned up on the cruise despite having not been invited to or even informed about the wedding.  Peter has stopped drinking and is trying to make peace with his son and his ex-wife, Alicia (Eleanor Parker).  What Doug and Alicia do not know is that Peter is terminally ill.  And what neither Doug nor Peter knows is that Alicia is on the verge of filing for bankruptcy.

Meanwhile, Carol’s plain-spoken grandfather (Lorne Greene) feels uncomfortable with all of the rich folks but then he meets Doug’s equally plain-spoken aunt (Audra Lindley).  Could we be heading for a double wedding?  It is The Love Boat, after all!

There aren’t really any big surprises on this episode but it’s likable nonetheless.  For this episode, the crew and the cast actually sailed to Alaska and all the action was filmed during an actual cruise.  The scenery is gorgeous, even if it’s obvious that the cast was frequently freezing while filming their scenes.  By this point, the show’s regulars had their chemistry down perfectly and all of the 3rd season premiere’s guest stars are well-selected.  I especially liked the performances of Lorne Greene, Audra Lindley, the great Ray Milland, and Tony Roberts.  Julie and Jack’s reunion was far more touching that I think anyone would expect from a show like The Love Boat, with Tony Roberts playing the role of Jack so well that the viewer really did believe that, under different circumstances, he and Julie truly would have had a wonderful life together.  This was a great way to start the third season.

Retro Television Reviews: Fantasy Island 3.10 “Class of 69/The Pug”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1986.  Almost entire show is currently streaming is on Youtube!

This week, boxing comes to Fantasy Island!

Episode 3.10 “Class of 69/The Pug”

(Dir by Earl Bellamy, originally aired on November 24th, 1979)

Once again, this episode opens with no banter between Mr. Roarke and Tattoo.  Instead, Tattoo announces the arrival of the plane and rings the bell and then he and Mr. Roarke head down to the docks to meet their guests.  This is the third episode in a row without any pre-guest banter and I have to admit that I’m really missing it.

As for this week’s guests, they’re an improvement on last week’s rather forgettable offering.

Joey Lee (Gary Collins) is a former heavyweight boxer who comes to the Island with his son, Mitch (K.C. Martel).  Joey thinks that he’s just been hired to serve as a sparring partner for the world champion, Jackson Malone (Fred Williamson).  Jackson has a title defense coming up, right on the Island.  What Joey doesn’t know is that Mitch’s fantasy is for his father to have a shot at the championship.  When Malone’s opponent has to drop out of the fight, Joey is named as a substitute.  Mitch is excited, until he finds out that Joey is being pressured to take a dive in the third round.  Will Joey throw the fight?  And, even if Joey doesn’t, how will Mitch react to seeing his father getting pounded in the face by the world champion?  Will Mitch learn that his love for his father is more important than his father’s championship?

This fantasy was a typical Rocky rip-off, right down to Fred Williamson doing a credible Apollo Creed impersonation.  The problem, of course, is that the middle-aged and mild-mannered Gary Collins was in no way credible as a heavyweight boxer.  The fact that the world champion was played by an actual athlete didn’t help matters.  (It’s true that Carl Weathers, like Williamson, was also a football player before he played Apollo but Sylvester Stallone himself had been an amateur boxer before he played Rocky so it was easier to buy the idea of their match going the distance.)  In the end, I liked the fact that Mitch realized that his father’s health was more important than being champion.  The fantasy had a nice ending, even if it’s difficult to buy the set-up.

The other fantasy featured Adrienne Barbeau as Brenda Richards.  When she first arrives on Fantasy Island, Tattoo comments on how obese Brenda is, even though she’s only a few pounds overweight.  (Adrienne Barbeau wears a very unconvincing fat suit.)  Mr. Roarke explains that Brenda was humiliated at her high school prom when her date, arrogant jock Lance (Tim Thomerson), tricked her into undressing in the gym before then bringing in the entire senior class in to laugh at her.  (Yikes!)  The high school reunion is being held on Fantasy Island and Brenda’s fantasy is to get revenge.  Roarke gives her a potion which allows her to be thin for 48 hours.  (In reality, Barbeau just ditches the fat suit.)

At the reunion, Brenda tricks Lance into taking off his wig.  The entire senior class discovers that Lance is totally bald and they laugh and laugh.  Everyone is impressed with Brenda’s revenge except for Brenda’s old high school friend, Bernie Drexel (Fred Grandy, taking a break from The Love Boat).  Brenda sees that she was just as cruel to Lance as he was to her back in high school so she makes a public apology and encourages everyone to be kind to one another.  Barbeau then puts the fat suit back on.  Bernie says that Brenda will always be the most beautiful woman that he knows.  Awwwww!

I actually liked this fantasy, largely because of the chemistry between Barbeau and Grandy.  Plus, Tim Thomerson made a great arrogant jock.  I know that some people will say that this episode featured too many jokes about Brenda’s weight (especially considering the fact that, even before drinking the potion, Brenda was hardly obese) but I appreciated the fact that it had an anti-bullying message.  And if her romance with Bernie inspires Brenda to eat healthy and start getting regular exercise, all the better!

At the end of the episode, Mr. Roarke tells Tattoo that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  “To me,” Mr. Roarke says, “you are six feet two inches tall.”

Uhmmm….yeah, I don’t know how I feel about that ending.  It seems like the show, whether intentionally or not, is saying that Tattoo will be forever unloved because of his height.  Even without the pre-guest banter, Roarke is finding ways to passive-aggressively taunt his assistant.  That’s life on Fantasy Island.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Nicolas Roeg Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today would have been the 95th birthday of the great and enigmatic director, Nicolas Roeg.  As both a cinematographer and a director, Roeg was responsible for some of the most visually striking films ever made.  Today, we honor his legacy with….

4 Shots From 4 Nicolas Roeg Films

Walkabout (1971, dir by Nicolas Roeg, DP: Nicolas Roeg)

Don’t Look Now (1973, dir by Nicolas Roeg, DP: Anthony Richmond)

The Man Who Fell To Earth (1976, dir by Nicholas Roeg, DP: Anthony Richmond)

Insignificance (1985, dir by Nicolas Roeg, DP: Peter Hannan)

Retro Television Reviews: Hang Time 6.5 “Have No Fear” and 6.6 “At The Movies”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Hang Time, which ran on NBC from 1995 to 2000.  The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

Will you always remember you and your friends at Hang Time?

Episode 6.5 “Have No Fear”

(Directed by Miguel Higuera, originally aired on October 21st, 2000)

Temple U. comes to Deering to offer Silk a full scholarship to attend their college and play basketball for their team.  At first, Silk is excited but then he makes the mistake of playing a little basketball with the college players.  It turns out that they’re a hundred times better than Silk!  Silk then discovers that Temple expects its players to practice everyday, to attend every away game, and to maintain a B average.  Silk decides that it’s too much to deal with and announces that he would rather go to Atlantic University.

“Atlantic sucks!” Eugene exclaims.

Anyway, Coach K eventually tells Silk that he need to take the chance and go to Temple.  Personally, I think Silk had every right to be concerned because, over the past few seasons, it’s not like Silk has ever been that good of a player.  For instance, he’s never the one who shoots the game-winning basket.  He’s never the one who risks getting hooked on pills because the team will lose if he’s not on the court.  He’s never been the one who has gotten an oversized ego after being featured in a magazine.  By the standards of Hang Time, he’s a below-average player.  Why does Temple want him as opposed to Michael or Julie?

All that said, Silk still decides to take a shot and go to Temple.  Good for him.

Meanwhile, in the far more amusing B-plot, Julie and Kristy buy a car together but then spend all of their time arguing over who is a better driver and who gets to use the car on which night.  This is another one of those plots where Mary Beth acts as an agent of chaos.  She’s the one who suggests that Kristy and Julie should get the car together and, for some reason, she tags along when Kristy and Antonio and Michael and Julie go on a double-date together.  At this point, I think the only  reason why Mary Beth is still attending classes at Deering is so she can cause stir the drama.  That’s actually kind of neat.  It suggests that Mary Beth knows that she’s in a television show and that she understands that this particular episode needed some silliness to make up for all of the uninteresting stuff with Silk.  Good for Mary Beth!

Episode 6.6 “At The Movies”

(Directed by Miguel Higuera, originally aired on October 28th, 2000)

Oh God.

This episode features Dustin Diamond playing himself.

Antonio and Kristy are both working at the movie theater as a part of their “work study program.”  (Why can’t they just get a job?  Why does it have to be a part of a program?)  Anyway, Kristy is appointed assistant manager and decides that a sure way to make money would be to do a midnight showing of Saved By The Bell: Wedding in Vegas.  And because the other members of the Saved By The Bell cast had all moved on to real careers by the time this episode was filmed, the show had to make due with Dustin Diamond showing up as the special celebrity guest.  Yes, Dustin plays himself but still speaks in his annoying Screech voice.

I don’t want to talk too much about it.  I pretty much zoned out as soon as Dustin arrived.  I feel a little bit bad about that because Dustin Diamond did not have a particularly happy life and died far too young but, still, he was so annoying whenever he did the whole Screech thing.  Add to that, you may remember that, a few seasons ago, Dustin Diamond made a cameo appearance as Screech.  And before that, Mary Beth went to Space Camp with Ryan Parker, a student at Bayside.  So, what’s the deal, Hang Time?  How is Screech both real and fictional at the same time?

Meanwhile, Mary Beth freaked out after she had a romantic dream about Eugene.  This led to Mary Beth going out on a date with Eugene to see if she actually had feelings for him.  (Uhmm, Mary Beth …. remember that you have a boyfriend going to Duke?)  It turned out that Mary Beth didn’t and that’s a good thing.  We already suffered through Mary Beth dating Vince.

Anyway, the important thing is that everything worked out in the end.  With the help of Dustin Diamond, Antonio learned a lesson about being a good employee and Mary Beth realized that she wasn’t in love with Eugene.  Yay!

Next week: Hammer returns!

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us For April Rain and Death Wish V!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasionally Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 2014’s April Rain I picked it so you know it’ll be good.

Following #MondayActionMovie, Brad and Sierra will be hosting the #MondayMuggers live tweet.  We will be watching 1994’s Death Wish V!  The film is on Prime!

It should make for a night of fun viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto Mastodon, pull up April Rain on YouTube, start the movie at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!  Then, at 10 pm et, switch over to Twitter and Prime, start Death Wish V, and use the #MondayMuggers hashtag!  The live tweet community is a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.   

Scene That I Love: Steve Martin Reveals What He Needs In The Jerk


Today, the Shattered Lens wishes actor and comedian Steve Martin a happy 77th birthday.  Originally from Texas, Martin has been a cultural mainstay for longer than I’ve been alive.  He’s an adept banjo player and an occasional actor, equally skilled at both comedy and drama.

Today’s scene that I love comes from 1979’s The Jerk, in which Steve Martin reveals all that he needs.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Wim Wenders Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy 78th birthday to the great German director, Wim Wenders!  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Wim Wenders Films

The American Friend (1976, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Paris, Texas (1984, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Wings of Desire (1987, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Until the End of the World (1991, dir by Wim Wenders, DP: Robby Muller)

Lisa Marie’s Week In Review: 8/7/23 — 8/13/23


As I’ve already said this week, rest in peace to the great William Friedkin.  Much like Paul Schrader, he was a veteran of the Golden Age and he was willing to say whatever was on his mind, regardless of whether it was the conventional wisdom or not.  We could definitely use more filmmakers like Friedkin.

It’s still hot.  When I try to think about what I did over this past week, I mostly remember getting mad about the heat.  Right now, my main focus is on getting things ready for October.

I watched two of the best crime films of the 70s, Dirty Harry and Death Wish, Eastwood and Bronson at their best!

Here’s what I watched, read, and listened to this week!

Films I Watched:

  1. Aerobicide (1987)
  2. Blood Harvest (1987)
  3. Brian’s Song (1971)
  4. Cinderella Liberty (1973)
  5. Corbin Nash (2018)
  6. The Cosmic Man (1959)
  7. Death Metal (2023)
  8. Death Wish (1974)
  9. Dirty Harry (1971)
  10. Frogs (1972)
  11. Houston, We’ve Got A Problem (1974)
  12. John Wick: Chapter Four (2023)
  13. The Lost Arcade (2015)
  14. My Friends Need Killing (1976)
  15. Shocking Dark (1989)
  16. Superfights (1995)

Television Shows I Watched:

  1. Big Brother 25
  2. The Challenge USA
  3. Claim to Frame
  4. Dr. Phil
  5. Double Dragon
  6. PGA Tour on CBS
  7. 60 Minutes
  8. Stars on Mars
  9. T. and T.
  10. Welcome Back, Kotter
  11. Yes, Minister

Books I Read:

  1. Shakespeare’s Book: The Story Behind The First Folio and the Making of Shakespeare (2023) by Chris Laoutaris

Music To Which I Listened:

  1. Avril Lavigne
  2. Big Data
  3. Britney Spears
  4. Calvin Harris
  5. The Chemical Brothers
  6. Christina Aguilera
  7. Jessica Simpson
  8. Katy Perry
  9. Lindsay Lohan
  10. Olivia Rodrigo
  11. Saint Motel

Live Tweets:

  1. Superfights
  2. Death Wish
  3. Dirty Harry
  4. Frogs

News From Last Week:

  1. Director William Friedkin Dies at 87
  2. King of the Hill Voice Actor Johnny Hardwick Dies at 64
  3. Musician Robbie Robertson Dies at 80
  4. Actor Robert Swan Dies at 78
  5. Cinematographer Stan Waterman Dies at 100

Links From Last Week:

  1. Tater’s Week in Review 8/11/23
  2. RIP William Friedkin…A Celebration Of The Director Of “The Exorcist”, “The French Connection” and More…
  3. Witch Hunts

Links From The Site:

  1. I reviewed John Wick: Chapter 4 and Houston, We’ve Got A Problem!
  2. I reviewed Hang Time, Fantasy Island, The Love Boat, City Guys, T. and T., and Welcome Back, Kotter!
  3. I shared my week in television!
  4. I shared scenes from Psycho and The Ten Commandments,
  5. I paid tribute to Alfred Hitchcock, Sam Fuller, Stuart Gordon, William Friedkin, and Nicholas Ray!
  6. Erin shared Amazing Stories, The Stirrup Boss, Convention Queen, Fantastic Adventures, Pep Stories, Love Story, and Sensuous Loves!
  7. Jeff shared music videos from Van Halen, X, Def Leppard, Robbie Robertson, Poison, Wang Chung, and BRuc

More From Us:

  1. For Horror Critic, I wrote about Night of the Bloody Apes!
  2. At Reality TV Chat Blog, I shared Week 1 Veto Meeting, Too Many Alliances, It’s Time To Open The Diary Room …. Or Is It?, About Tonight, Week 2 Nominations, No Updates Yet, and And We’re Back With A Veto Winner!
  3. At my music site, I shared songs from The Chemical Brothers, Lindsay Lohan, Katy Perry, Avril Lavigne, Christina Aguilera, Big Data, and Saint Motel!
  4. At her photography site, Erin shared Caddo Lake, Caddo Lake 2, Caddo Lake 3, Caddo Lake 4, Caddo Lake 5, Caddo Lake 6, and Hiding!

Want to see what I did last week?  Click here!

Retro Television Reviews: Houston, We’ve Got A Problem (dir by Lawrence Doheny)


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay.  Today’s film is 1974’s Houston, We’ve Got A Problem!  It  can be viewed on YouTube!

The year is 1970 and Apollo 13 is the latest manned NASA mission into space.  The head of the mission of Jim Lovell and the destination is the Moon.  Unfortunately, the American public has gotten so used to the idea of men going to the Moon that hardly anyone is paying attention to Apollo 13.  That changes when Lovell contacts mission control in Houston and utters those famous words, “Houston …. we’ve had a problem.”  An oxygen tank has exploded, crippling the spacecraft and leaving the three men in danger.  If Houston can’t figure out how to bring them home, Apollo 13 could turn into an orbiting tomb.

Yes, this film tells the story of the same crisis that Ron Howard recreated in Apollo 13.  The difference between Houston, We’ve Got A Problem and Apollo 13 (beyond the fact that one was a big budget Hollywood production and the other a low-budget made-for-TV movie), is that Apollo 13 largely focused on the men trapped in space while Houston, We’ve Got A Problem is totally Earthbound.  In fact, Jim Lovell does not even appear in the ’74 film, though his voice is heard.  (The film features the actual communications between the crew and Mission Control.)  Instead, the entire film follows the men on the ground as, under the leadership of Gene Kranz (Ed Nelson), they try to figure out how to bring the crew of Apollo 13 home.  Houston, We’ve Got A Problem is a far more low-key film than Apollo 13, one that features narration from Eli Wallach to give it an effective documentary feel but one that also lacks the moments of wit and emotion that distinguished Apollo 13.  

NASA cooperated with the making of the film and it works best when it focuses on the men brainstorming on how to solve the biggest crisis that the American space program had ever faced to that date.  The film is less effective when it tries to portray the effects of the men’s work on their home lives.  Sandra Dee is wasted as the wife who can’t understand why her engineer husband (reliably bland Gary Collins) can’t spend more time at home.  Clu Gulager plays the guy who fears he’s missing out on time with his son.  Robert Culp plays the man with a heart condition who places his hand over his chest whenever anything stressful happens.  Steve Franken has to choose between his religious obligations and his obligation to NASA.  The melodrama of those fictional moments are awkwardly mixed with the based-in-fact moments of everyone calmly and rationally discussing the best way to save the crew.  Jim Lovell, as a matter of fact, complained that Houston, We’ve Got A Problem did a disservice to the flight controllers by presenting them all as being hopelessly inept in their lives outside of mission control.  (Lovell was reportedly much happier with Apollo 13.)

Because it features the actual conversations between the crew and Mission Control, Houston, We’ve Got A Problem is interesting as a historical document but it never escapes the shadow of Ron Howard’s better-known film.