Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, OJ Simpson is stalked by an abhorrent admirer!

Episode 5.3 “Fale Start”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on October 25th, 1989)

Johnny Gunn, the new quarterback, is injured while leading the Bulls to victory in their latest game.  Westwood, who has an unexplained dislike for Gunn, convinces the drugged quarterback to sign away his power of attorney and then has Gunn undergo a risky surgery.  When Gunn realizes what has happened, he goes to the construction site of Westwood’s new house and knocks a few things over.  The lesson?  When your quarterback has just finished spending several years in prison for manslaughter, don’t upset him.

Dr. Death is stunned to discover that the highest bidder in the “Win a Day With Dr. Death” auction was not Heather Locklear but instead Carlyle Trent (Vince Edwards), a motorcycle-riding millionaire who happens to be gay.  (Trent was obviously based on publisher Malcolm Forbes Sr.)  Trent thinks that Dr. Death might be gay too.  Oh, the hilarity, I guess.  Actually, this storyline wasn’t as homophobic as one might expect from 1st & Ten.  One of cool things about Dr. Death is that, despite his fearsome image, he’s usually the most open-minded and least prejudiced of all of the Bulls.

Finally, TD Parker (OJ Simpson) finds himself being stalked by a woman named Lisa (Laura Alavarez).  Hey, that’s my name!  Anyway, what starts as a one night stand ends with OJ having to talk Lisa out of shooting him and Kristy.  Wow, OJ Simpson getting stalked by a homicidal maniac.  Who would have guessed?

This episode tried to cram three big storylines into just 24 minute and, as a result, everything ended up feeling a bit half-baked.  Last season, for all of its flaws, did seem to have a definite destination in mind,  The Bulls were finally going to win the Championship Game.  This season, on the other hand, has been all over the place.

Get it together, Bulls!