Pre Code Confidential #20: SAFE IN HELL (Warner Brothers 1931)

Posted on June 5, 2018 by gary loggins

“Wild Bill” Wellman gave us some of the wildest movies of the Pre-Code Era: THE PUBLIC ENEMY, NIGHT NURSE, FRISCO JENNY, HEROES FOR SALE, WILD BOYS OF THE ROAD. But for sheer, unadulterated sleaze, you can’t beat SAFE IN HELL, chock full of lust, murder, shady characters, and a marvelous performance by the virtually forgotten Dorothy Mackaill.

Scantily clad Gilda Karlson (Mackaill) is a New Orleans prostitute, and there’s no doubt about it right from the get-go! We see her lounging around as she takes a call from her madam (Cecil Cunningham) to go out on a job and show a john a good time. That john turns out to be Piet van Saal (Ralf Harolde), the man she was caught in flagrante delicto with by his wife, leading to her current sordid life. Piet tries to rekindle that old flame (for a price, of course), but Gilda turns him…

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What Lisa Watched Last Night #181: Nightclub Secrets (dir by Joe Menendez)

Posted on June 3, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I watched the latest Lifetime Movie Network premiere, Nightclub Secrets!

Why Was I Watching It?

Because it was on the Lifetime Movie Network, of course!

However, I also have to say that I really liked the title. Usually, whenever the word “secrets” appears in the title of a Lifetime movie, it’s a good sign. And, let us not forget, this title not only promised us secrets but nightclub secrets as well! As anyone who has watched 54 can tell you, nightclubs are full of secrets…

What Was It About?

It’s the story of two sisters and their alcoholic mother. Rachel (Rachel Hendrix) is wild and does mysterious things. Zoe (Kate Mansi) reads mysteries and teaches a creative writing class, in which she encourages her students to be sadists when it comes to coming up with difficulties for their characters to overcome.

It’s also the story of a murder. When Zoe is informed that Rachel’s been murdered, she decides to investigate her sister’s secret life. It leads to the shy and repressed Zoe getting a job as a “bottle girl” at the same nightclub where her sister worked. How many secrets can you fit in a nightclub? It’s time for Zoe to find out!

What Worked?

I liked the sibling relationship between Rachel and Zoe. It rang true and it’s authenticity provided some needed depth to the film’s plot. Kate Mansi, who played Zoe, has done a quite a few Lifetime films and always does a good job of striking the right balance between emotional honesty and melodramatic fun. As well, I thought Gigi Rice did a good job playing the alcoholic mother.

Towards the end of the film, there was an enjoyably absurd twist. I won’t spoil it in this review but it was still fun, even if it did demand quite a suspension of disbelief.

What Did Not Work?

For a movie that was called Nightclub Secrets, the film really didn’t feature enough secrets about the nightclub. I was hoping for something that would be a little bit more fun and sordid like Confessions of a Go Go Girl or maybe Babysitter’s Black Book. Instead, this movie was a pretty much a standard Lifetime murder mystery that just happened to feature a nightclub.

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

I related to both of the sisters. I can be wild like Rachel. I can be shy like Zoe. Zoe and I both love solving a mystery. That said, I don’t know if I’d ever want to work in a nightclub, if just because I’m not a huge fan of crowds, drunks, or, for that matter, working. So, if I got a job in a nightclub, I supposed it would have to be one of those struggling nightclubs that no one ever goes to. Of course, those nightclubs always go out of business after a few weeks so it probably really wouldn’t be worth the trouble to even apply for the job.

On an unrelated note, I used to live near a nightclub where you were required to bring your tax return if you wanted to get inside. If you didn’t make a certain amount of money, you weren’t allowed to enter. Needless to say, on any given night, you could find the least likable people in the world standing in line outside of the place. If any business was ever begging to be the target of a wacky, Ocean’s 11-style heist, it was that place. Of course, the last time I drove by there, it had been turned into a Gold’s Gym.

Lessons Learned

It’s not easy being a bottle girl.

Stop the Presses!: Howard Hawks’ HIS GIRL FRIDAY (Columbia 1940)

Posted on June 2, 2018 by gary loggins

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In my opinion, Howard Hawks’ HIS GIRL FRIDAY is one of the greatest screwball comedies ever made, a full speed ahead movie that’s pretty much got everything a film fan could want. A remake of the 1930 Lewis Milestone classic THE FRONT PAGE (itself an adaptation of Ben Hecht and Charles MacArthur’s Broadway smash), Hawks adds a delightful twist by turning ace reporter Hildy Johnson into editor Walter Burns’ ex-wife… and casting no less than Rosalind Russell and Cary Grant in the roles!

The two stars are in top form as the bickering ex-spouses, with their rapid fire banter nothing short of verbal dynamite. Grant in particular spouts off words quicker than a rapper (where did he get all that wind!) and his facial expressions and comic squeals (reminiscent of Curly Howard!) are simply priceless! Roz is more than his match as Hildy, with one lightning-fast zinger after another. Miss…

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Crime Does Not Pay: Stanley Kubrick’s THE KILLING (United Artists 1956)

Posted on May 31, 2018 by gary loggins

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Before Stanley Kubrick became Stanley Kubrick, he made a pair of low-budget crime dramas in the mid-50’s that are standouts in the film noir canon. The second of these, THE KILLING, is a perfect movie in every way imaginable, showing flashes of the director’s genius behind the camera, featuring just about the toughest cast you’re likely to find in a film noir, and the toughest dialog as well, courtesy of hard-boiled author Jim Thompson.

THE KILLING is done semi-documentary style (with narration by Art Gilmore), and follows the planning, execution, and aftermath of a two million dollar racetrack heist. Sterling Hayden plays the mastermind behind the bold robbery, a career criminal looking for one last score. He’s aided and abetted by a moneyman (Jay C. Flippen ), a track bartender (Joe Sawyer ), a teller (Elisha Cook Jr. ), and a crooked cop (Ted de Corsia ). He…

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Film Review: This Island Earth (dir by Joseph M. Newman and Jack Arnold)

Posted on May 31, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Oh, those poor aliens!

Ever since the 1950s, intergalactic diplomats, soldiers, and explorers have come to Earth looking for help. Some of them have come from planets that orbit dying stars. Some represent civilizations that have been destroyed by war or pollution. Some of them have come here looking to inspire us to be more peaceful and less destructive. Others were just looking for something to eat.

What they all have in common is that they all came to Earth and things really didn’t work out that well. Occasionally, they ran into humans who, due to cynicism and skepticism, simply weren’t willing to help. Often, the aliens arrived just to discover that the humans had no interest in being conquered. Remember what Eros yelled at the Plan 9 From Outer Space? “Your stupid, stupid minds!” Oh yeah? Well, our menfolk kicked your ass and blew up your flying saucer. So there.

Consider the sad case of Exeter (Jeff Morrow), the alien at the center of 1955’s This Island Earth. Exeter has come to Earth with his associates and disguised himself as a human. Despite the fact that they all have remarkably high foreheads and a total inability to relate to actual humans, no one seems to suspect that Exeter and his friends are from outer space. Even when he starts recruiting leading scientists to come hang out at his isolated headquarters, it doesn’t seem to occur to anyone that they should be too concerned. Exeter’s just a little bit weird. Why worry?

Well, Dr. Carl Meacham (Rex Reason) is worried! He’s a pilot and a scientist and he’s got a square jaw and one of those deep, 1950s American male voices. Everything that Dr. Meacham says sounds authoritative. When you hear that confident, take-no-prisoners voice, you have no doubt that Eisenhower’s in the White House and everything’s going to be alright. Carl doesn’t trust Exeter and he suspicions are proven correct when he and Dr. Ruth Adams (Faith Domergue) are taken to Exeter’s war-ravaged planet. Not only is the planet on the verge of blowing up but the whole place is crawling with mutants!

Unfortunately, it takes a while for Carl, Ruth, and Exeter to reach the planet. This Island Earth is an oddly structured film. The first third of the film deals with Carl and his squirmy associate, Joe (Robert Nichols), building something called an interocitor. Once Carl has shown that he can follow the alien instruction booklet, Carl is allowed to meet Exeter. (For some reason Joe is left behind.) Once Carl arrives at Exeter HQ, it’s another lengthy wait before he, Ruth, and Exeter are launched into space.

Still, on the plus side, one of the scientists gets to drive this really cool car:

(Unfortunately, the car doesn’t make it to the end of the movie.)

The movie gets a lot better once the action moves to Exeter’s home planet. The planet was a gloriously realized world, a pop art masterpiece:

And then there were the mutants! Look at this thing:

Anyway, despite the slow start, This Island Earth is a classic of 1950s science fiction, one that manages to maintain a perfect balance between the sublime and the ludicrous. Rex Reason and Faith Domergue are inoffensively bland as Carl and Ruth but Jeff Morrow brings a weary and even tragic dignity to the role of Exeter. If nothing else, it lives up to its title by suggesting that Earth actually is just one insignificant island in the vast ocean of the universe and that both humans and aliens are mere slaves to fate. For all of his deep-voiced authority, Carl really doesn’t accomplish much over the course of the film. By that same token, for all of his efforts and his integrity, there’s little that Exeter can do to alter the destiny of his planet. At times, This Island Earth is almost existential in its portrayal of both human and extraterrestrial inability to alter the whims of fate. Of course, it’s also a frequently silly film that will be a lot of fun for anyone who appreciates a good B-movie.

On Saturday night, I watched This Island Earth with my friends in the Late Night Movie Gang. After last week’s experience with Disco Beaver From Outer Space, I decided to play it safe this week. We had a lot of fun with This Island Earth. In case you want to learn how to make an interocitor of your very own, the film is available on YouTube.

New Recipe: HOW TO STUFF A WILD BIKINI (AIP 1965)

Posted on May 29, 2018 by gary loggins

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HOW TO STUFF A WILD BIKINI, the sixth entry in American-International’s “Beach Party” series, attempts to breathe new life into the tried-and-true formula of sun, sand, surf, songs, and corny jokes. Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello are still around as Frankie and Dee Dee, but in this go-round they’re separated; he’s in the Navy stationed on the tropical island of Goona-Goona, while Annette has to contend with the romantic enticements of Dwayne Hickman .

Frankie’s part amounts to a cameo, enlisting local witch doctor Buster Keaton (!!) to keep those girl-hungry beach bums away from Dee Dee (while he frolics unfettered with lovely Irene Tsu !). Keaton’s magic ain’t what it used to be, so he has his daughter conjure up a knockout named Cassandra, who first appears on the beach as an animated bikini. All the boys go ga-ga for Cassandra, including a go-go ad man named Peachy Keane…

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Special Memorial Day Edition: THE DEVIL’S BRIGADE (United Artists 1968)

Posted on May 28, 2018 by gary loggins

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In the wake of 1967’s THE DRITY DOZEN came a plethora of all-star, similarly themed films. THE DEVIL’S BRIGADE is one of those, though just a bit different: it’s based on the true-life exploits of the First Special Service Force, a collection of American misfits straight from the stockades and the crack, highly disciplined Canadian military, forging them into one cohesive fighting unit.

William Holden heads the cast as Lt. Col. Robert Frederick, tasked with putting the units together. His seconds-in-command are the cigar chomping American Major Brecker (Vince Edwards) and proud Canadian Major Crown (Cliff Robertson). The Americans, as rowdy a bunch of reprobates as there ever was, include Claude Akins , Luke Askew, Richard Jaeckel, and Tom Troupe, while the Canadians are represented by the likes of Richard Dawson, Jeremy Slate, and Jack Watson , war movie vets all. Andrew Prine is also aboard as an AWOL…

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Solo: A Star Wars Story, A review with the spoilers that you deserve! By Case Wright

Posted on May 26, 2018 by casewright

GO SEE THIS MOVIE! I don’t remember when Star Wars came out, but I do remember when Empire did and I loved it. Yes, there were some deeper themes to these movies, but at their heart they were fun like a beach read. We, the fans, have made these films into something they never were serious think pieces. I just saw a youtube video where a guy was trying to describe the “correct” routes Han would have to take through the Kessel Run. Give it a rest!

This movie did what the last 6 have failed to do: Entertain. Rogue One was a melancholy piece of trash about sending an email on a vhs tape. BORING. The rest are mind-numbingly painful experiences that are determined to take themselves so seriously that I have had more fun reviewing license agreements for my latest Turbo Tax software. I really don’t care about Rey or the Ugly Gloomy Kid Kylo Ren who failed to get any of Han’s good looks. If I were Han, I would have called up Maury Povich about that kid.

This movie did what it was supposed to do first: entertain. It’s like the other movies never bothered to put that basic principle into the writers’ room. Ron Howard really did a great job with the film and Alden Ehrenreich really succeeded in capturing a pre-cynical, but still cocky Han. It could be that I also liked this story because Han reminds me the most of myself: edgy, cocky, wise-cracking, iconoclast, with devastating good looks.

The story even opens uniquely without any moody sad bullshit. Instead, it opens with some text, the title card, and Han driving away fast and furious, and a bit bloodied. There’s no everyone’s perfect and noble blah blah blah. Within 30 minutes, you are transported to a high-stakes futuristic train robbery that if it had a couple tumbleweeds and player piano, it would have been a great Western.

Han begins his quest because he loses his love Emilia Clarke. Han between you and me: you gotta lock that down. Other than Emilia, everyone else in the universe is gross and scaly even pretty people make ugly kids (see above) there must be radiation in this galaxy far far away or some such shit. Han figures that if he does enough smuggling and heists he’ll get enough cash, to buy a ship and get Emilia Clarke out of the hellhole from whence she came. It doesn’t quite work out the way he plans, but you see a great character arc as Han become more cynical and savvy as the rogue we will eventually love.

As he is going on his big heist, we watch his friendship develop with Chewy, Lando, and most of all the Millenium Falcon which comes across as a character herself. Most of the critics who have done middling reviews seem to focus on the box office, but unless you’re a shareholder of Newscorp or an accountant at 20th Century fox, why do you care?! Another bizarre critique is that it’s too fun or not melancholy enough as Rogue One. Okay, I have solution for the people who don’t think this amazingly well-done feature isn’t sad enough for them: Go see this film, then shortly thereafter do a search for political twitter and then click show threads or just look up one of your hollywood heroes and count the indictments.

Cleaning Out The DVR: Mommy’s Little Angel (dir by Curtis Crawford)

Posted on May 26, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

(I recorded Mommy’s Little Angel off of Lifetime on March 17th.)

Katie Porters (Morgan Nuendorf) may only be 12 years old but she’s already had to deal with a lot.

Her mother, Shawna (Kimberly Laferriere), loves her and swears that she would do anything to protect Katie but she’s also a pill-popping drug addict who is constantly on the verge of losing control. It doesn’t help, of course, that Katie keeps hiding her mother’s pills. It’s almost as if Kate is trying to get her mother in trouble…

Her father, Darren (Peter Michael Dillon), just spent three years in jail for physically abusing Shawna. Darren says that he just wants to be with his daughter but Shawna wants nothing to do with him and moves to a different town to get away from him. Of course, Darren always manages to track Katie and Shawna down. That probably has something to do with the fact that Katie is always letting him know where she and her mother are hiding.

Katie’s a bad kid with bad thoughts but no one realizes it, largely because she’s only 12 years old and she always knows how to smile and be charming. For instance, Shawn’s cousin, Nikki (Amanda Clayton), thinks that Katie’s the best! And Katie likes Nikki, too! Of course, what’s not to like? Nikki has a nice big house and, because she’s desperate to be a mother herself, spoils Katie. In fact, Katie even tells Shawna that she doesn’t care if anything bad ever happens to Shawna. “I’ll go live with Aunt Nikki,” Katie says.

What a little brat!

Anyway, something bad does eventually happen to Shawna. She ends up getting tossed off of the top level of a parking garage. The police and everyone else assume that Shawna committed suicide. Of course, what they don’t know is that 1) Darren murdered Shawna and 2) Katie arranged for Shawna to be murdered.

So now, Katie is finally living with her Aunt Nikki! And you would think that Katie would be happy about this! But no, Katie’s never happy. As soon as she moves in, Katie comes to realize that there’s all sorts of things competing for Nikki’s attention. Whether it’s her job or even her husband, Nikki always seems to be putting other things ahead of Katie.

And then, Nikki discovers that she’s pregnant!

Guess how Katie responds to that?

In recent years, Lifetime has shown a surprisingly large number of psycho kid films. They really do tap into feelings and fears to which all women can relate. What if your child does grow up to be a psycho? Also, what if your friend or cousin does a terrible job parenting and then dies and suddenly, you find yourself obligated to take care of their murderous children? It’s a concern because, deep down, we’re always convinced that most people have no idea how to raise children.

The thing that distinguishes Mommy’s Little Angel from other Lifetime movie about killer kids is just how efficient Katie is in her villainy. I mean, Katie doesn’t mess around. When she decides to set a house on fire, it’s obvious that she knows exactly what she’s doing. When it’s time for Katie to try to convince Nikki to kill for her, Katie chants, “Kill him, Nikki. Kill him…” It’s not just that little Katie is evil. It’s that Katie’s so happy about it! It all leads to a film that’s enjoyably melodramatic and over-the-top, even by the wonderful standards of Lifetime.

Seriously, don’t turn your back on Katie…

The TSL’s Grindhouse: Clown (dir by Jon Watts)

Posted on May 26, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Clown, a gory horror film, sucks.

I can’t say that I was particularly surprised to discover that it sucked but still, I was hoping that it would be better than it turned out to be. That’s largely because the film itself has a fairly compelling backstory. In 2010, director Jon Watts and his co-writer, Christopher D. Ford, uploaded a fake trailer for Clown to YouTube, in which they stated that the film would be produced by Eli Roth. Roth saw the trailer and was so impressed that he actually did decide to produce the film.

Filming began in 2010 and the film spent a while playing the festival circuit, where it got the type of vaguely respectable reviews that are usually given to low-budget horror films made by amateur filmmakers that no one is ever expecting to hear from again. In 2012, Dimension Films and FilmNation Entertainment acquired the rights to distribute Clown. What followed was an agonizing wait as Clown was basically released in almost every other country in the world. except for the USA. In fact, it wouldn’t be until 2016 that Clown would get an American release. During that time, Jon Watts received deserved acclaim for directing Cop Car and he was hired by Marvel to direct Spider-Man: Homecoming.

As an admirer of Watts’s subsequent films, I was really interested in seeing Clown. So, yesterday afternoon, I sat down and I watched Clown on Netflix.

Clown is the story of a stupid guy named Kent McCoy (Andy Powers) who tries to save his son’s birthday party by dressing up like a clown. What Kent doesn’t know is that the clown makeup is cursed and that, by putting it on, he’s now allowed himself to be possessed by a demon that feeds on children! What a dumbass! Kent tries to wash the makeup off his face but it won’t come off. He tries to take off his rainbow wig, just to discover that it’s now permanently attached to scalp. His wife uses a screw driver to try to pop off the red nose but, instead, she just rips his real nose to pieces. (The family dog eats the red nose and promptly becomes possessed.) Kent keeps telling everyone that he’s been possessed by a demon but no one believes him. Everyone just thinks that he’s a weirdo in clown makeup.

It sounds more interesting than it is. For all the promise in the idea of a possessed clown, Clown doesn’t do much with it. Clown is 90 minutes long but it only has enough plot for 30 minutes. The remaining hour is basically made up of characters repeating what we already know. We watch as Kent learns that the clown makeup is cursed. Then, we have to follow his wife as she does her own research and discovers that the clown makeup is cursed. Then, Peter Stomare shows up and starts explaining to everyone that the clown makeup is cursed. By this point, I was yelling at the screen, “I KNOW THIS ALREADY!”

Throughout the film, there are hints of the Jon Watts’s talent but, for the most part, they remain merely that. There’s an effective scene that takes place in a jungle gym at Chuck-E-Cheese’s and occasionally, there will be a line of dialogue or a movement of the camera that actually lives up to the plot’s subversive potential. However, especially when compared to Cop Car and Spider-Man, Clown is an abysmally paced film. It’s also terribly acted with Andy Powers neither sympathetic nor compelling as the possessed man in clown makeup. Not even a reliable character actor like Peter Stomare can bring much to the material.

The general rule of most horror films is that, no matter what the threat, dogs and children usually survive. The film not only breaks that rule but it breaks it multiple times. In fact, there’s so much blood spilled in the film that I actually found myself getting depressed watching it. Lacking both a satiric edge and any real interest in subverting the horror genre, Clown instead comes across as being unnecessarily mean-spirited. It’s just not much fun to watch.

When it comes to killer clowns, stick with Pennywise.