Author Archives: Dazzling Erin

I Watched Blood, Sweat and Cheer (2023, Dir. by Traci Hayes)

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

Divorcee Renee (Tammin Sursok) is so upset when her teenage daughter Cherie (Monroe Cline) moves in with her father that, despite being nearly 40, Renee enrolls in high school and becomes a cheerleader.

PARENTS!  DO NOT DO THIS!

This was based on a true story.  A 30 year-old mother imitated her 13 year-old daughter, enrolled in a middle school and spent a day there, posting to social media.  She was eventually arrested for trespassing and tampering with government records.  She said she was doing it to make a point about school’s not being secure enough and she certainly did that.  But, even if the real mother did make her point, I repeat:

PARENTS!  DO NOT DO THIS!

DO NOT EVER EVER DO THIS!

Your children will never forgive you if you do.  High school is not your place.  Your place is drinking wine and talking to your girlfriends about how much you love Andy Cohen.

In this film, Renee looks a lot older than 30 and she also manages to stay enrolled in the school for nearly an entire semester.  She becomes a cheerleader!  She dates a student!  A teacher get uncomfortable when she flirts with him because she’s too young.  She kills people to hide her secret because she’s having so much fun in school.  But she looks like she’s closer to 50 than 40.  It takes more than getting bangs to erase those age lines.  Is everyone at the school blind?

It’s not a very plausible movie but, when I was a cheerleader in high school, there were a lot of cheer moms who would have loved to have enrolled in the school and taken their daughter’s place on the squad.  None of them were crazy enough to try it, though.  Instead, they would just sit in on practice and make everyone uncomfortable.

Luckily, this movie is a comedy and it made me laugh enough for me recommend it.  Renee just went to such extremes to try to reclaim her high school years.  Cheer moms are crazy.  You have to laugh.

I Watched G.I. Jane (1997, Dir. by Ridley Scott)

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

Demi Moore plays the first woman ever to be accepted for Navy SEAL training.  Anne Bancroft plays the senator who sponsored her but secretly wants her to fail.  Viggo Mortensen is the hardass drill sergeant who I think is secretly in love with Demi Moore even though he doesn’t admit it during the movie.  Ridley Scott directed, so the movie looks and sounds great.  Demi shaves her head and tells Viggo to “Suck my dick.”  All the other SEALS-in-training start shouting, “Suck my dick!” at each other.  It becomes their rallying cry.  That will put the fear in the hearts of America’s enemies.

When I first saw G.I. Jane, I really liked it.  I got really caught up in whether or not Demi Moore would complete her training and prove all the chauvinists wrong.  Rewatching the movie today, I realized that it was silly for me to worry about whether or not Demi Moore would become a SEAL.  Of course she does!  If she didn’t, the movie would be a real downer.  This movie was made back when Demi Moore was always cast as serious women who never laughed and who were always intense.  If they didn’t let Demi Moore become a SEAL, she would have burned down the entire Navy.

Rewatching, I still liked the movie.  Demi Moore and Viggo Mortensen having a glare-off?  Be still my beating heart!  Demi Moore wants to become a SEAL but Sen. Anne Bancroft betrays her.  So much for sisterhood!  Is the movie saying that women belong in combat but not the Senate?  It better not be!  Maybe we need a sequel where Demi Moore takes down the new Ayatollah and then runs for the Senate.

I wanted to end this review by telling you about the real first woman to complete Navy SEAL training but I discovered that hasn’t happened yet.  Hopefully, it will soon.  Demi Moore didn’t shave her head for nothing.