Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC!  It  can be viewed on Peacock.

This week, Brodie gets a storyline, Luther Mahoney continues to destroy lives, and Pembleton’s marriage collapses.  It’s a busy few days in Baltimore.

Episode 5.16 “Valentine’s Day”

(Dir by Clark Johnson, originally aired on February 14th, 1997)

When a man  is found dead in the apartment of Alan Schack (Neil Patrick Harris), Detective Munch assume that it was a case of suicide.  However, Brodie went to school with Schack and is convinced that he’s the murderer.  Munch refuses to take Brodie serious but, luckily, Sgt. Howard is more open-minded.  After Alan beats up Brodie and leaves him on a snowy street, Brodie leaves Baltimore because he knows he’ll never get over the shame of being beaten up Neil Patrick Harris.  Just kidding!  Instead, Brodie doctors a tape to make it seem as if the police have evidence of Alan killing the victim.  Alan falls for it because …. I guess he’s just really stupid.  Like seriously, wouldn’t Alan have — at the very least — noticed that he was dressed totally different on videotape than he was on the day he committed the murder?  Or does Alan just wear the same outfit day after day?

When two seemingly unrelated bombs go off, Kellerman and Bayliss find themselves investigating a — all together now! — “red ball!”  Their investigation eventually leads them to the son of the grocer who was murdered by Luther Mahoney a few episodes ago.  The bombs are being sent to the people who the son blames for Luther getting away with murder.  One bomb is sent to the courthouse.  “Lewis is at the courthouse!” Bayliss exclaims.  “So is Julianna!” Kellerman says.  Well, that’s convenient.

Frank and Mary Pembleton attend marriage counseling. It doesn’t go well.  Frank finally agrees to allow their newborn daughter to be baptized despite the fact that he’s still struggling with his faith.  Mary, however, still leaves Frank afterwards.  She takes their daughter with her.  Frank is left alone in their home, staring at an empty crib.

And finally, due to budget cutbacks, Giardello has to dust his own office!

On the plus side, I related to Giardello’s need to dust.  As a sometimes struggling Catholic, I appreciated that the show took seriously Mary’s concerns about their daughter dying outside of a State of Grace.

Unfortunately, the rest of the episode just felt off.  Neil Patrick Harris as a tough guy drug dealer?  Nope.  Sorry.  I loved NPH as Dr. Horrible but I’m still not buying it.  As for the bombing storyline, it felt almost like a parody of an episode of Homicide.  Oh no!  There’s a bomb at the courthouse and Lewis and Dr. Cox just happen to be standing right outside the doorway!

I regret to say it but this episode just didn’t work for me.