Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!
This week’s episode is all about the thrills!
Episode 3.21 “Thrill Show”
(Dir by Gordon Hessler, originally aired on February 23rd, 1980)
Bonnie (Randi Oakes) has a decision to make. Her ex-boyfriend and mentor, Ray (John McCook, of Bold and the Beautiful fame) has come to Los Angeles and is trying to convince her to quit the force and join him as a member of the Joie Chitwood Thrill Show!
The what?
I have to admit that I had no idea what the Joie Chitwood Thrill Show was but all of the police officers were really excited about it and the episode’s storylines all came to a halt for ten minutes so we could have an extended sequences of drivers doing stunts. I assumed that the Joie Chitwood Thrill Show was a real thing and a quick check with Wikipedia confirmed that I was correct. (In fact, Chitwood played Charlie, James Bond’s unfortunate driver in Live and Let Die.)
While Bonnie struggles with her future, Baker and Ponch pursue the members of a rock band who have been robbing tourist buses so that they can raise the money to record their first album. Hell yeah, that’s taking control of your future! The leader of the band was named Malcolm and he was played by Paul Nicholas, who also played Peter Frampton’s brother in Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. Whatever else you may think of that film, Nicholas’s performance of You Never Give Me Your Money was nicely done.
This episode seemed to primarily exist to advertise the Chitwood show but, as I’ve stated before, I’ve always liked fast cars and dramatic stunts. What can I say? I’m a Southern girl, it’s in my blood. The idea of a band robbing tourists to pay for its album was actually kind of interesting, even if the episode didn’t really do much with it. Paul Nicholas was a bit more charismatic than the typical CHiPs co-star.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show can be purchased on Prime!
After a two-week hiatus, the retro television reviews are back! Let’s start with MiamiVice.
Episode 4.6 “God’s Work”
(Dir by Jan Eliasberg, originally aired on November 6th, 1987)
Father Ernesto Lupe (Daniel Lugo), an old friend of Castillo’s, runs an AIDS hospice in Miami. When Father Ernesto is shot and murdered, Castillo takes a particular interest in the case.
Was Father Ernesto shot by one of the neighborhood homophobes, the same punks who spend their free time spray-painting obscene graffiti on the front doors of the hospice?
Was Father Ernesto’s death connected to his brother-in-law, notorious drug lord Jorge Cruz (Alfonso Arau)? The Vice Squad has been investigating the Cruz family. Francesco (Franceso Quinn) is the brutish son, the one who enjoys throwing his weight around and who goes out of his way to bully everyone that he meets. Felipe (Esai Morales) is the young son, who has just returned from Miami after making a fortune as a stockbroker in New York. Is Felipe looking to take over the family business?
Actually, Felipe wants nothing to do with the family business. He’s returned to Miami because an ex-boyfriend is a patient at the AIDS hospice and Felipe wanted to spend time with him before he died. And Father Ernesto’s death had nothing to do with drugs. Instead, Jorge shot him because Jorge blamed Ernesto’s sermons, which stressed God’s love above all else, for being responsible for Felipe “becoming” gay. Even after Felipe explains that the sermons had nothing to do with it and that he’s always been gay, Jorge still thinks that he can “cure” his son by making him a part of the family business.
Yikes!
There was a lot going on in this episode. In fact, there was almost too much going on. Between Castillo investigating Ernesto’s death and Tubbs (working undercover) trying to arrest Franceso, this episode sometimes felt a bit overstuffed. It was still an effective episode, though, featuring good performances from Arau, Quinn, Morales, and Edward James Olmos. Castillo actually got to laugh at one point in this episode. I don’t think that’s ever happened before.
This episode did remind me — as I think almost every episode does — that Crockett and Tubbs undercover work has never made much sense. Tubbs spends the majority of the first half of the episode pretending to be a criminal looking to make a deal with Francisco. That’s fine. It even allows Tubbs to use his fake Caribbean accent. It’s been a while since we’ve heard that. But then, after Father Ernesto is shot, Tubbs shows up at the crime scene with his badge. Now, seriously, Father Ernesto is Francesco’s uncle. Francesco is a suspect in the murder. Why would Tubbs run the risk of blowing his cover like that? For that matter, why was Vice investigating a homicide?
Even when Vice is good, it often doesn’t make sense.
Hi, television. It’s been a while since I’ve really had time to watch you!
Here’s what I watched this week:
Cold Case: The Tylenol Murders (Netflix)
This is the latest in the true crime docuseries that Joe Berlinger has been doing for Netflix. Over three episodes, this series told the story of a series of Tylenol poisonings that occurred in the early 80s. The show featured the last record interview with James Lewis, the number one suspect. Personally, I thought Lewis came across like he was guilty as Hell. If you’re like me and you suffer from frequent headaches, exercise some caution before watching this one.
Good American Family (Hulu)
I finally watched this true crime miniseries this week. Good American Family centers around the story of Natalia Grace, a seven year-old with dwarfism who was abandoned by her adoptive parents. Her adoptive mother (played by Ellen Pompeo) claimed that Natalia (played by Imogen Faith Reid) was actually a 22 year-old con artist.
It’s an interesting story and the miniseries featured good performances from Pompeo and Mark Duplass, cast as her husband. But, at 8 episodes, the whole thing felt a bit overextended and the show itself was pretty inconsistent. As so often happens with these Hulu true crime docuseries, the attempts to use the story to critique and satirize middle America fell flat.
Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy birthday to Shane Kippel!
Shane Kippel, as I’m sure I don’t have to tell you, played Spinner Mason on Degrassi: The Next Generation. He started out as the school bully but, by the time the third season began, he was pretty much the heart of the ensemble. How cool was Shane Kippel? He was so cool that Spinner ended up getting held back three times just so there would be an excuse to keep Kippel on the show!
(“What type of idiot fails his own language!?” Spinner once said when confronted with his grade in English. Oh, Spinner!)
Today’s song of the day features Shane Kippel on drums. From Degrassi, here is Downtown Sasquatch with Dust!
(The other members of the band are Jake Epstein on vocals, Aubrey Graham on guitar, and Adamo Ruggiero on bass.)
Everyone knows that Sean Connery made his debut of James Bond in 1962’s Dr. No but what they may not know is that Sean Connery was not the first actor to play James Bond. James Bond made his first appearance 8 years earlier when an American television show called Climax! presented a 48-minute adaptation of Ian Fleming’s first Bond novel, Casino Royale.
In this version of Casino Royale, James Bond was known as Jimmy Bond and he was about as American as you can get. (Felix Leiter, meanwhile, was now English and named Clarence Leiter). Jimmy Bond was played by Barry Nelson, an actor who is probably best known for playing the blandly friendly hotel manager in Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining. Casino Royale’s villain, Le Chiffre, was played by none other than Peter Lorre.
This version of Casino Royale was initially meant to serve as a pilot for a weekly television series but, perhaps fortunately, the Climax version of Casino Royale didn’t get much attention when it was originally aired. According to Sinclair McKay’s authoritative Bond book, The Man With The Golden Touch, this version of Casino Royale was forgotten about until a copy of it was discovered in the 1980s. By that time, of course, everyone knew that James Bond was English and that Felix Leiter was American.
Thanks to YouTube, I’ve seen the Climax! Casino Royale and it’s definitely a curiosity. If Dr. No hadn’t launched the James Bond film franchise, there would be little reason to watch this version of Casino Royale. It moves a bit slowly, is way too stagey, and it reveals that, contrary to what we’ve all heard, live television was not always the greatest thing on the planet. Not surprisingly, this adaptation contains none of the brutality or the moral ambiguity that makes Fleming’s novel such a fun read. American television audiences would not see Jimmy Bond strapped naked to a chair and an American television show would never end with the hero saying, “The bitch is dead.” The best you can say about this version of Casino Royale is that Peter Lorre makes for a good villain (in fact, of the three versions of Casino Royale, the television version is the only one to feature an effective Le Chiffre) and Barry Nelson would have made a good Felix Leiter.
That said, I still find the television version of Casino Royale to be fascinating from a historical point of view. This is the type of show that you watch for curiosity value. This is the type of show that you watch so that you can think about how different things could have been.
So, presented for your viewing pleasure, here’s the original version of Casino Royale:
Hi, everyone! I have a quick programming note. Because of the holiday and my own need to get caught up with some other TSL projects that I’m currently working on, I will be taking a two week-long break from my Retro Television Reviews. They will return on Monday, June 9th, with reviews of MiamiVice and CHiPs!
For those of you keeping track, Monday is all about the cops, with Miami Vice and CHiPs. Tuesday will feature FantasyIsland and PacificBlue. Wednesday serves up The Love Boat and Monsters. Thursday gives us Malibu, CA and Highway to Heaven. Friday gives us St. Elsewhere and Friday the 13th. Saturday presents us with The American Short Story and Check It Out! And on Sunday, we’ve got Homicide: Life on the Street and Degrassi High!
Again, Retro Television Reviews will return on June 9th. Thank you for your understanding and patience!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The entire series can be found on YouTube!
This week …. hey, where is everyone?
Episode 3.14 “Repetition”
(Dir by William Fruet, originally aired on February 5th, 1990)
After newspaper columnist Walter Cromwell (David Ferry) accidentally hits and kills a girl with his car, he finds himself consumed with guilt. He also start to hear the girl’s voice in his head, demanding that he bring her back to life. Walter just happens to have a cursed amulet, one that allows the owner to bring someone else back to life as long as he kills someone who is wearing the amulet. Walter’s first victim is his dying mother. But after he kills her, he starts to hear her voice demanding to be brought back to life. So, Walter commits another murder, one after the other, trying to bring back to life every one who he kills.
This was an interesting episode because neither Johnny nor Jack were anywhere to be seen. Instead, it was just Micki and she only appeared at the start and the end of the episode. The entire episode focused on Walter and his descent into madness and, it must be said, that worked just fine. This show’s strength has always been its collection of cursed antiques and this episode allowed us to see how one of them actually works. We saw how the amulet manipulated Walter and how Walter himself became more and more hooked on using the amulet’s power. I’ve always viewed the antiques as being a bit like drugs and their users being addicts and this episode certainly played into that theory.
This was an intense episode, featuring moody visuals and a strong script from David Lynch’s daughter, the future director Jennifer Lynch. After last week’s odd episode, it was nice to see an episode this week that actually got to the heart of what this series was always supposed to be about.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988. The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!
This week, we start season 2!
Episode 2.1 “Ties That Bind”
(Dir by Bruce Paltrow, originally aired on October 26th, 1983)
The second season is here and there are changes to be found in the opening credits.
David Birney and G.W. Bailey are no longer listed in the opening credits. I’m not sorry to see Birney go as Dr. Samuels was never that interesting of a character. I will miss Bailey’s performance as Dr. Beale.
Norman Lloyd is now listed in the credits, appearing right after Ed Flanders. Ellen Bry, Kim Miyori, and Eric Laneuville are also now listed in the opening credits. That’s good. Last season, Shirley Daniels (played by Ellen Bry) was one of the most important characters on the show and it always seemed strange that she was left out of the opening. Mark Harmon, sporting a mustache, appears in the credits, though he didn’t appear in this episode. The final addition to the opening credits is Nancy Stafford, who does appear in this episode.
Stafford plays Joan Halloran, the new city budget advisor who has been assigned to cut St. Eligius’s budget. She tells Westphall and Auschlander that St. Eligius is not popular downtown. “They call you St. Elsewhere,” she says. Joan wants to do away with the animal research lab, which is a part of the hospital that has never been mentioned before. (And with good reason. Boo, animal research, boo!) Westphall finally agrees, on the condition that the city fund Dr. Craig’s attempt to perform a heart transplant on teacher Eve Leighton (Marian Mercer).
Wisely, Dr. Craig gets a lot of screentime in this episode. If the first season seemed to often be unsure of just how abrasive the show should allow Craig to be, the second season premiere would seem to suggest that the show’s writers realized that the more abrasive Craig is, the better. Of course, Dr. Craig has good reason to be in a bad mood. As he confesses to Nurse Rosenthal, he caught his son doing drugs. Craig explains he kicked him out of the house and now, he wants nothing to do with him.
Speaking of drugs, orderly Luther (played by Eric Laneuville) finally manages to capture the thief who has been stealing all the drugs from the hospital. Dr. White is no longer under suspicion! Yay, I guess. I don’t know. Dr. White wasn’t in much of this episode but he still cames across as being a jerk. I have to admit that I groaned a little when I saw he was still on the show. A part of me is hoping he’ll get a redemption arc this season but, from his behavior during rounds, he still seems to be a jackass.
Speaking of jackasses, when Jerry Singleton (Alan Arkin) discovers that his wife, Fran (Piper Laurie), has had a stroke, he responds by crashing his car into the ER and then refusing to leave the doctors along while they try to save his wife’s life. Jerry is convincing that he knows everything and he’s very demanding. Naturally, Fran’s doctor is Jack Morrison because Morrison always gets the really depressing cases. Fran does wake up from her coma but she neither speaks no seems to hear anything anyone says to her. I can’t imagine this is going to end well, mostly because she’s Morrison’s patient and things never seem to go well when Morrison is involved. (What’s really sad is that Morrison, unlike Peter White, is a good doctor! He just has rotten luck.)
Shirley Daniels finds out that Fiscus is cheating on her with Kathy Martin, who spends most of this episode promoting cryogenics. Shirley responds by dumping Fiscus and telling him that he’s a pig. Fiscus tells Kathy that they no longer have to sneak around, just for Kathy to say that the sneaking around was the whole point. She promptly dumps Ficus.
Finally, Dr. Ehrlich meets a woman, Bobbi (Jean Bruce Scott) at the laundromat. They go back to her apartment. She strips down to her underwear. She has Ehrlich tie her to the bed. Ehrlich realizes that he has to get something from his car so he runs outside and …. gets locked out. And then he nearly gets arrested while trying to use his credit card to open the building’s door. However, the next day, Bobbi shows up at the hospital for her “encounter group,” and the two of them are reunited. Again, I have a feeling this is not going to end well, just because it involves Dr. Ehrlich.
Hey, this episode was pretty good! It moved quickly, it reintroduced us to the cast, and all of the stories were actually fairly interesting. It’s obvious that show’s producers paid attention with what didn’t work during season one and they made an effort to improve things with season two. Compared to the majority of this first season’s episodes, the pace was quicker, the humor was sharper, and just about everyone got a moment or two to shine. I’m looking forward to next week!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Highway to Heaven, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!
This episode …. ugh.
Episode 3.24 “Ghost Rider”
(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on April 1st, 1987)
This episode was …. bad. It was really bad. I know that HighwaytoHeaven is a show with its own unique style and that it’s necessary to sometimes set aside cynicism and just accept the show in all of its sincere and earnest glory but I just couldn’t do it with this episode.
Birdy Belker (Didi Conn) is a ghost writer. She writes the Roger Bolt spy novels, which are then credited to the glamorous Natasha Gudonov (Victoria Carroll). Roger was a real spy. He died years ago but Birdy still has a bit of a crush on him. Birdy is also Jonathan and Mark’s latest assignment. Jonathan decides to just wait for her outside of her apartment and introduce himself as being an angel.
“RAPE!” Birdy yells before then spraying Mark with a breath freshener that she mistook for mace.
Jonathan brings Birdy’s dead plants to life, proving that he’s an angel. Birdy goes from being terrified to inviting two strangers into her apartment. Birdy is single and her parents are giving a hard time about her lack of a boyfriend. Mark suggests that Birdy buy Roger’s old car, which is set to be auctioned off. Birdy and her father (Bobby Baum) go to the auction with Jonathan and Mark. Uh-oh, shady Boris (Adam Gregor) wants the car as well! However, Boris has to call his boss to see if he should bid more than $20,000. Jonathan stares at the phone until it explodes. Birdy wins the auction! She has the car!
(Destroying someone’s property does not seem like proper angel behavior, to be honest.)
It turns out that the car is haunted by the ghost of Roger Bolt (Warwick Sims). Jonathan insinuates that Roger is actually in Purgatory and helping out Birdy is his final chance to make it into Heaven. That’s …. okay, I guess. The problem is that Roger’s ghost doesn’t show up until 30 minutes into the episode. A ghost is a pretty big plot point to introduce that late in the game. Birdy is in love with Roger, up until she realizes that he’s a cad. Still, Roger redeems himself but helping Birdy outsmart the two spies who want his old car. Birdy becomes a celebrity, Roger goes to Heaven, and Birdy meets her new neighbor, a nerdy guy who seems perfect for her. But then, as Mark and Jonathan are heading to their next assignment, Roger’s car starts and we hear Roger’s voice. “Bolt, Roger Bolt.” Okay, so did he go to Heaven or not? Or is he still a ghost? What’s going on!?
My honest guess is that this was meant to be a backdoor pilot, one that would have featured Birdy and Roger’s ghost getting involved in espionage on a weekly basis. That’s really the only way that this oddly paced episode makes any sort of sense. Tonally, it had nothing in common with any other episode of HighwaytoHeaven that I’ve seen. It doesn’t work, largely because Birdy is an amazingly annoying character and Roger was a less than interesting take on the Bond stereotype.
This episode was definitely a misfire. Luckily, the season ends next week with an episode featuring Leslie Nielsen. That should be great! It certainly can’t be any worse than this one.
Through the Shattered Lens 