Tag Archives: Full House

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 1/30/22 — 2/5/22

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

As I promised last week, I spent most of this week getting caught up on movies.  Here’s some thoughts on what little television I did watch:

Allo Allo (Sunday Night, PBS)

Though the episode aired on Sunday, I didn’t get to watch it until Friday and I have to admit that I was a bit out of it at the time, so don’t even ask me to explain just what exactly happened.  I do remember that Officer Crabtree had a conversation in which he mangled the French language.  I know that happens every episode but still, it always makes me laugh.

The Amazing Race (Wednesday Night, CBS)

I wrote about the latest episode of The Amazing Race here!

The Bachelor (Monday Night, ABC)

Claytonbot continued to learn human emotions while the bachelorettes continued to accuse each other of not being on the show for the right reasons.  Claytonbot even cancelled the cocktail party due to some drama that was definitely totally real and in no way staged.  Like, totally, for real.

Bar Rescue (Weekday Mornings, Paramount TV)

I watched an episode on Tuesday.  A bartender couldn’t make the perfect Manhattan so Jon Taffer condemned everyone who worked at the bar to Hell.

Celebrity Big Brother (Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday Night)

I wrote about Celebrity Big Brother, the show that I love to hate, over at the Big Brother Blog.

Football Game: Bengals vs. Chiefs (Sunday Night, Fox)

I was happy when the Bengals won because they wear those cute helmets with the stripes.

Football Games: 49ers vs Rams (Sunday afternoon, CBS)

Everyone’s a winner as far as I’m concerned!  Yay!  But, on a much more realistic note, the Rams won.  Or was it the 49ers?  I can’t remember for sure.  Either way, congrats.

Full House (Sunday Mornings, MeTV)

I watched two episodes on Sunday.  Uncle Jesse was upset that no one cared about his crappy cover band.  I have to wonder if the band themselves ever resented having all of Danny Tanner’s bratty children wandering around the place while they were trying to rehearse.  Also, why didn’t they rehearse in the garage as opposed to that cramped living room?  I haven’t seen that many episodes of Full House but I’m getting the feeling that this show often did not make sense.

The Love Boat (Sunday Evening, MeTV)

It was a Halloween episode so everyone wore a costume.  Woo hoo!

The Office (All Week, Comedy Central)

On Friday, I watched the “Search Committee” episode, which I’ve always considered to be one of those shows biggest mistakes.  This was after Michael had left, D’Angelo had died, and Dwight had fired a gun in the office.  Jo appointed Gabe, Jim, and Toby to interview applicants to be the new manager and, of course, all of the applicants were played by celebrities.  The cameos were distracting and I still don’t understand why James Spader’s bland take on Robert California led to the show being massively restructured during the following season.  Of the celebs who interviewed, Ray Romano actually came across like he would have been the best fit for the show’s style but, if I remember correctly, Romano was already on another show at the time.  Personally, I think that, instead of trying to find another Steve Carell, they should have just hired some nondescript nobody to play the manager and spent the last seasons of The Office concentrating on the people working there.

I can still remember watching this episode when it originally aired.  At the time, I actually felt a bit of dread when Andy Bernard showed up to be interviewed because I knew he was probably going to end up with the job.  Andy was a funny character during his first two seasons with the show but, after that, Ed Helms’s performance started to become oddly needy.  All of the flaws that made Andy an unfortunate choice to be at the center of the season 8 were present in the “Search Committee” episode.

Finally, I have to ask — why would Jo put Jim on the Committee?  How does that make any sense?  He already had managerial experience so why didn’t she just promote him?

Open All Hours (Sunday Night, PBS)

Granville seemed to be really upset about something.  As usual, Arkwright was too busy obsessing on Nurse Gladys Emmanuel to care.  This was definitely an episode that I had seen before.

Pam & Tommy (Hulu)

I wrote about the first three episodes of Pam & Tommy here.

Parking Wars (Tuesday Morning, A&E)

The indie towing guys took a man’s truck and then laughed when the man said that he was going to lose his job and wouldn’t be able to feed his family.  What a bunch of scumbags.  “I feel bad for him but he came here cussing and I got no sympathy for that.”  ANY SYMPATHY, you illiterate fascist!

The View (Weekday Mornings, ABC)

It’s been a very long time since I’ve watched The View but I decided to watch it on Tuesday to see how they would deal with Whoopi Goldberg outing herself as being incredibly ignorant on the subject of the Holocaust.  It turns out that they didn’t really deal with it.  Whoopi briefly interviewed the president of the ADL, who mentioned that The View had never had a Jewish co-host.  The show then went to commercial and we came back with Whoopi and the gang talking about “you know who,” which I guess is their way of referring to Trump.  Later, Charlie Day was interviewed.  I like Charlie Day.  For one thing, he’s not an anti-Semite.

That night, after the show aired, ABC announced that Whoopi would be suspended for two weeks.  For the record, I don’t think Whoopi’s comments were malicious, at least not in the way that Nick Cannon’s anti-Semitic comments were.  (It’s kind of weird how Nick basically repeated the same anti-Semitic conspiracy theories that have, for centuries, been used to justify the persecution of the Jewish people but, afterwards, was allowed to keep his job as host of The Masked Singer and was also giving his own talk show.  Like seriously, how the Hell does that happen?)  I think Whoopi’s comments were ignorant and the fact that she doubled down on them, on both the show and apparently later on Colbert, shows the type of arrogance that only comes from never having to deal with anyone openly disagreeing with you.  I’d rather that, instead of suspending her and waiting for everything the blow over, The View would have used this opportunity to educate both Goldberg and the show’s viewers.  Whoopi Goldberg is 66 years old and, we are constantly told, a smart woman.  That she could be so ignorant is definitely a cause for concern.

The Winter Olympics (Weekdays, NBC and other stations)

I’ve tried to watch a little of The Olympics but the whole thing just feels icky this year.  As soon as the Olympics Committee guy started quoting John Lennon during the opening ceremonies, I had to look away.  I imagine I’ll watch a bit of skating and maybe some curling.  But I’m definitely in no way enthusiastic about the Olympics this year.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 1/23/22 — 1/29/22

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Another week in January essentially means another week of allergies and sneezing.  I watched quite a few movies this week but I also catched a few shows.  When you’re feeling under the weather, it’s sometimes more fun to watch something that’s only going to require 30 minutes of your attention as opposed to 132 of them.

Allo Allo (Sunday Night, PBS)

The show started with Rene nearly blowing up the cafe while trying to hide the stolen land mines and it ended with Herr Flick and Von Smallhousen trapped on a British airplane flying high over occupied France.  Along the way, Crabtree tried to speak French and the British airmen hid in a barrel.  It was all good fun.  I laughed.

The Amazing Race (Wednesday, CBS)

I wrote about the latest episode of The Amazing Race here!  Switzerland, as I mentioned in my write up, is a beautiful country.  The scenery is gorgeous and the people understand the value of staying on schedule.

The Bachelor (Monday Night, ABC)

This week on The Bachelor, the women went to group therapy and Clayton continued to try to understand and replicate human behavior.  Seriously, they should just call him the Claytonbot.  I keep expecting him to ask someone why humans laughs and cry.

Bar Rescue (Monday Morning, Paramount TV)

Jon Taffer rescued a karaoke bar.  Yay!  A world without music is not a world for any of us.

Football Game: Buccaneers vs. Rams (Sunday Evening, NBC)

If only both teams could have won!  Seriously, from what I’ve seen of it, football is the most depressing sport ever because the players on the team that doesn’t win always end up sitting there and crying while the other team is celebrating.  That sucks.  If I was the coach, I would make sure that every game ended in a tie so that everyone could be a winner.

Full House (Sunday Afternoon, MeTV)

God, this was a bad show.  I watched the first four episodes of the show on Sunday afternoon.  I felt kind of bad about not liking it but it was just so painfully cutesy.  The first episode of the series featured John Stamos and the goofy guy moving in with John Stamos.  The second episode featured John Stamos and his band trying to practice while two of Bob Saget’s daughters danced around.  (The band sounded terrible.)  The third episode featured …. I don’t even remember.  I know it was during the third or the fourth episode that the school year started.  Candace Cameron was upset about being put in a gifted class.  John Stamos hit on a teacher.  I can’t remember what the goofy one did.

From what I understand, the first four episodes are apparently the show’s highpoint so I can’t imagine what the rest of the series must have been like.

King of the Hill (Weekday Afternoons, FXX)

I watched three episodes of this classic on Friday.  Things got started with Grillstravaganza, in which Bobby temporarily fell under the influence of Joe Jack.  This was followed by the episode where Mr. Strickland briefly got involved with Luanne’s pool-based bible study group.  And then the final episode I watched featured Hank taking over the middle school’s organic garden.  Anything that featured Hank trying to motivate the apathetic students at the middle school was always funny.  Hank’s work at the organic garden may have been a success but he was still perturbed when he ended up getting added to the mailing list of a hippie food store called Passages.

Open All Hours (Sunday Night, PBS)

Granville discovered that he had a cousin and she used to be able to communicate with the spirit world.  Unfortunately, Granville’s spirit had already been too thoroughly broken for him to take much comfort in that knowledge.

Parking Wars (Monday Morning, A&E)

On Monday morning, as I watched the parking cops go out of their way to harass the citizens of Philadelphia, it occurred to me that most of these episodes were filmed over ten years ago.  I wonder how many of these people still work for the government and how many have retired.  How many are receiving a pension and how many are still walking the sidewalks and saying, “I’m just doing my job here?”  Hopefully, they’re all retired and collecting a pension.  It has to be kind of a sad existence, though.  How does anyone sleep soundly with the knowledge that they were a part of the system?

Seinfeld (Weekdays, Comedy Central)

I watched two episodes on Friday afternoon.  George and Jerry flew out to Hollywood to see Kramer.  kamer, meanwhile, was arrested for being a serial killer.  The real killer was Clint Howard, who was briefly arrested but who escaped police custody after George and Jerry accidentally left the backdoor of a police car unlocked.  It was all kind of dark, to be honest.

Silk Stalkings (Tubi)

On Monday, I got back to binging my favorite 90s show about attractive detectives investigating half-naked criminals.  The first episode featured Chris falling for a duplicitous skip tracer who, it turned out, was actually just a hitwoman.  Oh, Chris!  Everyone knows you and Rita are in love!  The next episode featured Chris and Rita investigating the murder of a vice cop.  They suspected that it may have been a cop-on-cop killing and, of course, it all linked up to Chris’s past.  It was kind of a dull episode, to be honest.  It wasn’t quite trashy enough.  Oh well!

I didn’t return to the show until Thursday.  The first episode I watched opened with the brutal murder of a wealthy married couple.  At first, Chris and Rita thought that the murders had been committed by the couple’s twin sons but eventually, it was discovered that it was actually the work of the maid and a hitman.  That episode was enjoyably sordid.  The episode that followed was a bit less interesting.  Chris and Rita investigated a gang of jewel thieves, one of whom was played by a youngish Tobin Bell.  It was all a bit bland but the chemistry between Rob Estes and Mitzi Kapture kept things fun.

Lisa Marie’s Week in Television: 1/16/22 — 1/22/22

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

I made a specific decision not watch too much TV this week (and next) so that I could concentrate on getting caught up on the films of 2021.  I made an exception for The Amazing Race, because I write about it for another site.  And, on Thursday, I did turn on the TV because I’ve had a long-standing argument with a friend of mine about whether or not The United States of Al is real show or just a twitter meme.  It turns out that it’s real!

Anyway, here’s a few thoughts on what little I watched.

Allo Allo (Sunday Night, PBS)

In occupied France, the search for the stolen money was replaced by the search for the stolen landmines.  Rene continued to try to run his cafe and cheat on his wife in peace while Michelle and the Resistance continued to insist that, as the bravest man in all of France, Rene had a responsibility to continually put his life in danger.  Along the way, Michelle said, “I shall say this only once,” and Herr Flick and Van Smallhousen disguised themselves as monks.  The comedy on this show is very broad but it’s also very well-acted so I can’t help but laugh.

Crabtree referred to the bombs as being “bongs.”  Again, it made me laugh.

The Amazing Race (Wednesday Night, CBS)

I wrote about the restart of the race here!  I shall miss Anthony and Spencer the most.

B Positive (Thursday Night, CBS)

This is one of Chuck Lorre’s many depressing sitcoms.  Imagine Mom but instead of being a bunch of drunks, all of the characters are terminally ill.  Anyway, I watched this week’s episode just to confirm to myself that this show actually exists.  And it does.  I didn’t pay much attention to the episode, though.  For some reason, what I did see reminded me of those annoying commercials that Kate McKinnon does for Verizon.

Who doesn’t love a comedy about people dying scared and alone?

Football Game: Cowboys vs 49 (Sunday Afternoon, CBS)

My initial reaction to Dallas’s loss went something like this: “Congrats on cheating your way to victory, San Francisco.  Must be great to have the officials on your side.  Well, you guys got the victory but at least my city is a nice place to live so we’ll call it a draw.”

Fortunately, it has since been explained to me what happened during the final minutes of the game and I now understand that the Cowboys lost because they made a lot of sloppy and stupid mistakes.  So, a sincere congrats to the 49ers and to the Cowboys: Stop screwing up!

Full House (Sunday Afternoon, MeTV)

MeTV showed four episodes of Full House as a part of their tribute to Bob Saget.  I watched all four and My God, that was a bad show.  Saget was likable, though.  And I liked both John Stamos and Lori Loughlin and even Candace Cameron did her best to bring some sort of reality to the over-the-top cutesiness of the show.  But everyone else was pretty obnoxious and the dialogue was so painfully sweet that it was impossible to listen to without cringing.  I do have to admit that the audience’s habit of responding to everything by going, “Awwwww!’ did make me smile a little.

Ghosts (Thursday Night, CBS)

Ghosts is about a couple who live in a haunted house with a bunch of quirky ghosts.  Cute concept but it gets old quickly.  Why can’t the scoutmaster ghost take that stupid arrow out of his neck?  This week, one of the ghosts discovered that she had the power to end people to Hell which … eh.  Like I said, it got old quickly.

Open All Hours (Sunday Night, PBS)

Arkwright was obsessed with Nurse Gladys Emmanuel.  Granville was depressed.  I’m pretty sure that Sunday was not the first that I had seen this episode.

The United States of Al (Thursday Night, CBS)

I watched an episode of this show just to see if it actually existed.  Apparently, it’s been on the air for a year or two but I have never met anyone who has actually watched the show.  Earlier this year, there was some twitter excitement over an extremely mawkish commercial for the show’s new season but that was pretty much it.  I always suspected that the commercial was actually some sort of viral prank but I guess I was wrong.

Anyway, this is about a veteran who lives with Al, who was his interpreter in Afghanistan.  It’s a culture clash comedy.  The main theme seems to be that Al is annoying af.  It’s also a Chuck Lorre sitcom so the show actually deals with serious issue in a cartoonish way.  This week’s episode featured Al getting addicted to online poker.  His roommate sprayed him with a garden hose until he snapped out of it.

Yep, this is a real show.

Oh!  And the episode ended with one of those stupid Chuck Lorre title cards for people who want to hit pause and discover what Chuck thinks about the world.  It was something about Liz Cheney.  It was like five or six words long but that proved to be too many for my ADD.  Oh well!

So that was the Unauthorized Full House Story…

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

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So, last night, after months of nonstop promotion, Lifetime finally aired The Unauthorized Full House Story and…

Meh.

I have a confession to make.  I am 99.9% sure that I have never seen a complete episode of Full House.  I’ve seen bits and pieces, of course.  But I don’t think I have ever watched a single episode from beginning to end.  And yet, despite this, I still feel like I know everything about the show.  I know that John Stamos was obsessed with his hair.  I know that the Olsen Twins played Michelle.  I know about “Oh mylanta!” or “Cut it out” and “you got it, dude,” and all the rest.  I know that Dave Coulier may have inspired Alanis Morissette.

And, though I’ve never seen an entire episode of Full House, I have seen The Aristocrats, a documentary that features Bob Saget telling an incredibly long dirty joke.  And, of course, I’ve also seen Half Baked, which featured Saget asking if Dave Chapelle had ever “sucked dick for coke.”

So, naturally, I figured that The Unauthorized Full House Story would feature a lot of cocaine being snorted backstage while an actress meant to Alanis went down on Coulier in a theater.  I mean, it had to be unauthorized for a reason, right!?

But no — much like last year’s Unauthorized Saved By The Bell, the Full House movie was notable largely for how little drama it featured.  Apparently, there were no scandals.  There was little to no conflict behind the scenes.  John Stamos was apparently a little stand-offish at first.  Bob Saget occasionally forgot there were children around and made an off-color comment.  Dave Coulier apparently was just happy to be there.

In other words, it was all pretty boring.  But, I still had fun live tweeting the film and apparently, a lot of people enjoyed reading my tweets.  So, in honor of what the Full House movie was truly all about, here’s a collection of my best tweets from last night.

Hell yeah!  But, before they get to Unauthorized Degrassi, Lifetime will be showing Unauthorized 90210 and Unauthorized Melrose Place in October!  Now, those shows will be worthy of being unauthorized!