Game Review: Night Train (2022, Evan Farris)


In this Twine game, you wake up in a train.  The train appears to be deserted, except for you.  Outside the windows, everything appears to be dark.  Do you explore the train and try to discover why you have become a passenger and just where exactly it is that you’re going?  Or do you go back to your compartment and wait for an answer?

This is a short and simple Twine game, written in the style of an old Choose Your Own Adventure book.  You are given various options that you can use to explore the train and hopefully learn what is going on.  Make the right choices and you’ll find the answers.  Make the wrong choice and you’ll fall victim to a fate of Lovecraftian horror.  The game takes less than ten minutes to play and I do wish there had been a few more options but the game’s story is intriguing and it does a good job of capturing the player’s attention.  This game really makes use of a classic Interactive Fiction scenario.  You wake up with no idea where or even who you are.  You spend the rest of the game trying to answer those questions.  There are a few typos in the game but, for all I know, there’s probably a few typos in this review.  None of them are serious enough to really interfere with the experience of playing the game itself.

Play Night Train!

Great Moments In Comic Book History #29: A Vampire Stalks The Night


Now that we are halfway to October, I decided to share my personal favorite cover from The Tomb of Dracula.

The Tomb of Dracula was a comic book that ran for 70 issues, from 1972 to 1979. It was published by Marvel and it’s generally considered to be one of the best of the horror comics. It was also the first comic book to feature the character of Blade, who was later brought to life by Wesley Snipes in one of the first successful films to be based on a Marvel comic.

I’m a Tomb of Dracula fan and a collector. I’ve got nearly every issue of Tomb of Dracula and it’s companion magazine, Dracula Lives. Below is my favorite cover:

Great Moments In Television History #25: Vincent Price Meets The Muppets


In 1977, during the 16th episode of The Muppet Show, Kermit The Frog got a chance to interview Vincent Price and show off his vampire moves.  Later, no worse for wear, Vincent joined with the Muppets to sing a song.

I’m surprised that this episode was aired on January 16th, 1977 and not during October.

Here is the scene that lives forever in meme form:

Previous Moments In Television History:

  1. Planet of the Apes The TV Series
  2. Lonely Water
  3. Ghostwatch Traumatizes The UK
  4. Frasier Meets The Candidate
  5. The Autons Terrify The UK
  6. Freedom’s Last Stand
  7. Bing Crosby and David Bowie Share A Duet
  8. Apaches Traumatizes the UK
  9. Doctor Who Begins Its 100th Serial
  10. First Night 2013 With Jamie Kennedy
  11. Elvis Sings With Sinatra
  12. NBC Airs Their First Football Game
  13. The A-Team Premieres
  14. The Birth of Dr. Johnny Fever
  15. The Second NFL Pro Bowl Is Broadcast
  16. Maude Flanders Gets Hit By A T-Shirt Cannon
  17. Charles Rocket Nearly Ends SNL
  18. Frank Sinatra Wins An Oscar
  19. CHiPs Skates With The Stars
  20. Eisenhower In Color
  21. The Origin of Spider-Man
  22. Steve Martin’s Saturday Night Live Holiday Wish List
  23. Barnabas Collins Is Freed From His Coffin
  24. Siskel and Ebert Recommend Horror Films

Stepfather III (1992, directed by Guy Magar)


As if Stepfather II was not bad enough on its own, 1992 saw the release of Stepfather III.

Once again, Jerry Blake/Gene Clifford manages to survive being mortally wounded at the end of the previous film.  After he recovers, he is sent to the exact same institution that he previously escaped from.  Guess what happens?  He escapes again!  Now using the name Keith, he marries Christine Davis (Priscilla Barnes) and become stepfather to her son, Andy (David Tom).  Andy is in a wheelchair.  Keith is convinced that Andy is faking his condition and keeps calling him “slugger.”  When Andy doesn’t respond, Keith prepares to move on to another single mother (Season Hubley).  But, before he can move on, Keith needs to take care of his current family.  Good thing that he has a woodchipper.

Terry O’Quinn did not return for Stepfather III.  The Stepfather is played by Robert Wightman, who looked and sounded nothing like Terry O’Quinn.  The film tries to explain it away by saying that the Stepfather got plastic surgery after he escaped from the institution but, unless the plastic surgeon was God, there’s no way that Jerry/Gene could ever have become Keith.

Stepfather III goes through the motions and even repeats the first film’s “buckle up for safety” gag.  By repeating all of the key scenes from the first (and even the second) movie, the third movie only succeeds in reminding us that The Stepfather doesn’t work without Terry O’Quinn’s performance and Joseph Ruben’s intelligent direction.  Keith becomes a standard movie slasher with a wood chipper.  He does inspire Andy to get out of his wheelchair, in a scene that will inspire more laughter than cheers.

One positive note: Season Hubley is in this movie!  Much as with Jill Schoelen in the first movie and Meg Foster in Stepfather II, this franchise had a way of attracting actresses who deserved better.

The Stepfather II: Make Room For Daddy (1989, directed by Jeff Burr)


Remember how, at the end of the first Stepfather film, Jerry Blake (played, in a classic horror performance, by Terry O’Quinn), was killed by the family that he was planning on murdering for not living up to his expectations?

It turns out that he wasn’t dead after all.  He was shot.  He was stabbed in the back.  Somehow, he wasn’t killed.  Also, despite being a mass murderer, he was sent to a mental institution where the security is so lackadaisical that he manages to murder a psychologist and a guard and then escape once again.

Taking on the name of Gene Clifford and passing himself off as a family therapist, the Stepfather continues his search for the perfect family.  He meets and becomes engaged to Carol (Meg Foster), who doesn’t find it weird that Gene is always whistling Camden Races.  Before he can marry Carol, Gene is going to need to dispose of her ex-husband and her best friend.  And, of course, Carol and her son Todd (Jonathan Brandis) are going to have to live up to Gene’s ideal of the perfect American family.

This is a disposable sequel, which eliminates all of the humor of the first film and just turns Jerry/Gene into another generic slasher.  The strength of the first film was that Jerry seemed likable up until the moment that his idealized vision of the perfect family was threatened.  Then he snapped and ended up in the basement, ranting and raving.  In Stepfather II, Gene is obviously dangerous from the start and a lot less interesting.  The movie is unfortunate and unnecessary and even Terry O’Quinn seems to be bored.  Give the film some credit, though, for giving Meg Foster a sympathetic role.  Gene may be crazy but no one could blame him for falling for Carol.  How could anyone resist those eyes?

Game Review: The Godfather II (2009, EA)


Since I had already gotten my old Xbox 360 out of storage so I could play The Godfather game this weekend, I decided to also try my hand at the replaying game version of The Godfather II.

The Godfather II takes place in the 60s.  You play Dom, a Corleone soldier who becomes Michael’s right-hand man after you help him escape from Cuba during the revolution.  Back in New York, Michael assigns you to take control of the city from the Rosato brothers.  Eventually, you will also gain the ability to fly out to Miami and Cuba, where you’ll meet Hyman Roth and continue to extort businesses and battle rival families.  It’s another Grand Theft Auto-style game, where you can focus on the story or you can just focus on exploring the open world and seeing what type of trouble you can get into.

The good thing about The Godfather II is that you get to select the members of your crew and you can send them on all of the missions that you don’t feel like dealing with.  They also stick with you and act as bodyguards whenever you get into a gun fight.  Choosing the members of your crew is one of the best parts of the game because every potential recruit comes with their own skills and their own personality.  Like you, the members of your crew can be taken out of commission if they get heavily wounded but they’ll always return after a brief trip to the hospital.  However, if you get tired of a member of your crew, you can remove his invulnerability and toss him off a roof or send him on a suicide mission to attack the Rosato Compound all by himself.  That’s the power of being the underboss.

Other than the stuff with the crew, Godfather II is not as much fun as the first Godfather game.  The combat feels clunky and the game’s overall design feel rushed.  Sending Dom to three different cities instead of concentrating on recreating 60s New York was a mistake.  There’s not that much difference between the game’s version of New York, Miami, and Havana.  Plus, the game didn’t allow me to take out Castro.  What’s the point of sending me to Havana if you’re not going to let me change history?

When it comes to Godfather games, the second one is good enough to be played once but it doesn’t reward a replay.  The first Godfather game is the one that still remains enjoyable after all these years.

Video Game Review: The Godfather (2006, EA)


Due to getting handed a major project at work, I missed the last few days of our annual Horrorthon and now I’ve got some catching up to do.  It’s frustrating and, whenever I get frustrated and need to blow off some steam, I get my old Xbox 360 out of storage and I concentrate my efforts on running the Straccis out of New Jersey.

New Jersey is one of the many neighborhoods that you can take over in EA’s video game version of The Godfather.  New Jersey is full of nice houses, dive bars, and police that are so incompetent that I got away with bombing their station on numerous occasions.  If you don’t feel like taking over New Jersey, you can go into Brooklyn and pick a fight with the Tattaglia family.  Or you can drive into Hell’s Kitchen, the worst part of New York and fight the Cuneos.  If you’re really brave, you can try to take over Midtown but Midtown is controlled by the Barzini family and the Barzinis don’t go down without a fight.  If you get into too many fights, you might accidentally start a gang war but you can always find an FBI agent in a church and bribe him to end the war.  Just don’t accidentally shoot the guy.  I did that a few times.

The Godfather is an open world game, a 1940s version of Grand Theft Auto that happens to feature characters from classic gangster film.  You play a Corleone family associate who, over the course of the game, goes from being a soldier to being the Don of New York.  Along the way, you take part in all of the major scenes from the film.  When Sonny is gunned down, you’re the one who chases his assassins.  When Michael shoots the Turk, you’re the one who drives him to the docks so he can head to Sicily.  When it’s time to get revenge on Paulie Gatto and Tessio, you’re the one handed the gun.  You get the idea.  James Caan, Robert Duvall, and even Marlon Brando voiced their film characters for the game.  (Brando’s recordings, unfortunately, weren’t usable and a soundalike was brought in to redo most of his lines.)  Al Pacino did not voice Michael and the game’s Michael looks nothing like Pacino because Pacino had already agreed to exclusively license his appearance to the Scarface game.

As a game, The Godfather can get repetitive.  As your gangster gains experience, he’ll level up and receive skill points.  It really doesn’t take that long to become so powerful that none of the other families have a chance against you.  (Only the Barzini Family remains challenging to the very end.)  The interactions with the storekeepers that you intimidate to get protection all tend to follow the same pattern.  Storywise, the game actually cheapens the movie because it suggests that the Corleones were so incompetent that they had to keep calling you in to clean up all of their messes.

But, flaws and all, the game is pretty damn addictive.  Once I get into my vintage, 1940s car and start driving around New York (which is lovingly recreated, even if it is on a much smaller scale than the real New York), I’m in the zone.  Under the right circumstances, the simplicity of The Godfather can be refreshing.  Drive around.  Hijack a truck.  Fight the gangsters.  If the police get upset, just go to a nearby safehouse and save the game.  If you get bored, grab a bomb and take out an abandoned building or maybe a parked car.  It’s a game so there aren’t any consequences to doing incredibly foolish things.  Or, if you just want to relax, you can just drive around the city and appreciate all of your territory.  It’s up to you.  When you’re the Don of New York, you can do anything you want.

Music Video of the Day: Hey Stoopid by Alice Cooper (1991, directed by ????)


Hey Stoopid is the title track off of Alice Cooper’s 12th solo studio album.  The song is about drug abuse and suicide, with Alice telling his listeners to stay off drugs, to “put the gun down,” and that rock and roll isn’t about being self-destructive.  Alice Cooper even sings, “You ain’t living in a video.”  (Thought he did struggle with alcohol and it would probably shock many of the people who criticized him during his 70s heyday, Alice Cooper has always been anti-drug.)  Slash plays guitar on the track while Ozzy Osbourne provided backing vocals.

The music videos is a mix of live action, animations, and Alice Cooper performing with a skull.  I wouldn’t mind spending a day in Alice Cooper Land.

Enjoy!

Music Video of the Day: You Could Be Mine by Guns N’ Roses (1991, directed by Andy Morahan, Stan Winston and Jeffrey Abelson)


In this video, Arnold Schwarzenegger is sent to the past to eliminate Guns N’ Roses but ultimately decides that it would be a waste of ammo.  Obviously, he knew that fulfilling his mission would change history and the world would never get to hear Chinese Democracy.

This song (and this video) were used to promote Terminator 2: Judgement Day.

Enjoy!