Game Review: The Twine Fishing Simulator (2022, maxine sophia wolff)

Posted on October 24, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

The Twine Fishing Simulator starts out like an old school fishing simulator. At first, everything about it, from the font to the simple directions, reminded me of the type of clunky but addictive text games that I used to play back in the early 90s. Back then, we didn’t need a lot of fancy graphics or even much descriptive text. We just needed our imagination.

You are fishing. You start at the Lake. If you catch enough different types of fish, new locations will be opened. Each new location gets bigger and there are new fish to catch at each place. There are also various rewards that you can get after you catch certain fish. There are NPCs who you can talk to. You can ask them questions about fishing. Some of them offer hints. Some offer side quests. Some ruminate on the nature of existence.

The further you get into the game, the stranger it gets. This is not a typical fishing simulator. It’s not just about catching the fish. It’s about why you’re catching the fish and why you’re moving from one location to another. It starts out as nostalgic fun and then gets increasingly surreal as the game progresses. I can’t reveal too much about it without spoiling the game’s puzzles but it’s ultimately one gigantic mindscrew disguised as a fishing simulator, and an entertaining one at that. Anyone can write a strange game but it takes talent and imagination to write a strange game that, like this one, is worth playing and even replaying.

It was only after I finished the game that I realized that I could have just stayed at the Lake and kept fishing.

Play The Twin Fishing Simulator.

Music Video of the Day: It’s Me by Alice Cooper (1994, directed by ????)

Posted on October 24, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

Is Alice Cooper haunting her dreams or has she been hypnotized? According to this song’s Wikipedia page, this video received “virtually no airplay” on MTV. 1994 was at the height of MTV’s embrace of grunge and also the beginning of Britpop so I guess Alice Cooper was not high on the channel’s radar.

This song appeared on Alice Cooper’s 13th solo album, The Last Temptation. All of the songs on the album dealt with a mysterious showman and his attempts to get a boy named Steven to join his traveling show. At least some parts of the video feature Alice in character as the showman.

Enjoy!

Great Moments In Comic Book History #30: Swamp Thing Makes His First Cover Appearance

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

Swamp Thing made his first appearance in DC’s House of Secrets #92 (July, 1971). It was a stand-alone story that was set in the early 20th century. It did not have much in common with the Swamp Thing that was all know today but the issue will always be remembered for its cover, which was drawn by Bernie Wrightson. The girl who is coming her hair while Swamp Thing approaches was modeled on Louise Jones, who would later be known as Louise Simonson and would become an important comic book writer in her own right.

Previous Great Moments In Comic Book History:

Sometimes They Come Back… For More (1998, directed by Daniel Zelik Berk)

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

The third and final Sometimes They Come Back film has nothing to do with the two films that preceded it. Those two films dealt with dead juvenile delinquents who came back to life to haunt the people who they blamed for their deaths. They came back for revenge. The third film has more in common with The Thing than the other two movies. If you’re going to make a movie that invites comparisons to The Thing, you better have the goods and unfortunately, this film doesn’t.

Captain Sam Cage (Clayton Rohner) and Major Callie O’Grady (Chase Masterson) are dispatched to an Arctic research center to follow up on reports that one of the researcher has snapped. For Cage, the mission is personal because his brother-in-law is at the center. What they discover is that almost all of the research personnel are dead and that Dr. Jennifer Wells (Faith Ford) and Lt. Brian Shebanski (Max Perlich) are the sole survivors. Someone at the research center had been studying Satanism and that, along with a portal to Hell under the station, leads to trouble. Soon, the dead are reanimating and stalking the living.

Sometimes They Come Back… For More gets off to a good start with the mystery at the base and a visual emphasis on the harshness of life in Antarctica. Clayton Rohner appeared in a lot of straight-to-video horror movies and, by the time he made this one, he was a pro at handling bad dialogue. Once Cage and O’Grady reach the base, the movie starts to go off the rails as the survivors make increasingly poor decisions, Faith Ford struggles to be a believable scientist, and an absurd twist is introduced concerning Cage and his brother-in-law (Damian Chapa). The movie was obviously influenced by The Thing and Alien but it never duplicates the claustrophobic intensity that made those films work. Not surprisingly, after this movie, they would not come back.

Sometimes They Come Back… Again (1996, directed by Adam Grossman)

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

When Jon Porter was a child, he witnessed the murder of his sister by three delinquents named Tony (Alexis Arquette), Vinnie (Bojesse Christopher), and Sean (Glen Beaudin). The three thugs would have killed Jon too except that they were electrocuted by an electrical wire in a puddle of water. Years later, the now adult Jon (Michael Gross) returns to his hometown for the funeral of his mother. Jon is now a psychologist and has a daughter named Michelle (Hillary Swank).

The death of Jon’s mother was no accident. Tony has come back to life and Michelle, not knowing that he’s a demon, has a crush on him. Tony soon brings Vinnie and Sean back to life and they seek revenge on the man who they blame for their deaths.

This straight-to-video sequel to Sometimes They Come Back is slightly better than the first film, mostly because Tony and his gang are more intimidating than the ghost greasers that haunted Tim Matheson and Michelle wanting to date the man that her father killed adds a new wrinkle to the story. There’s nothing about Hillary Swank’s performance that would make you think she was a future Oscar winner but she is likable and sympathetic. The member of the cast who make the biggest impression is Jennifer Elise Cox, playing Michelle’s Tarot card-reading friend. (Cox is probably best known for playing Jan Brady in The Brady Bunch movies.) Cox brings a lot of kooky charm to the movie and is featured in the film’s most memorable scene. Sometimes They Come Back… Again may not reinvent the horror genre but it’s a passably entertaining straight-to-video horror film.

Sometimes They Come Back (1991, directed by Tom McLoughlin)

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

In 1963, nine year-old Jim Norman witnessed a group of juvenile delinquents murder his older brother Wayne in a tunnel before getting killed themselves when a train came barreling down the tracks. Twenty-seven yeas later, Jim (Tim Matheson) is a history teacher and he has returned to his hometown to take a job at his old high school. He is haunted by memories of what happened in the tunnel and then he is haunted for real as, one by one, all of the dead delinquents returns to life and enroll in his class. They want revenge on the man that they blame for their fiery deaths.

Based on a Stephen King short story, Sometimes They Come Back was actually produced for television. It originally aired on CBS, complete with a warning that viewer discretion was advised. Though the ghost greasers are too ridiculous to really be scary (one of them laughs like a hyena), the movie was still more graphic than anything else that played in primetime that year. I wonder how television audiences, in those pre-American Horror Story days, reacted to one of Jim’s students being dismembered in the backseat of a car and the ghost greasers then tossing pieces of his body over the bridge?

Tim Matheson takes the material seriously and gives an intelligent performance as Jim Norman. Fans of Newhart might enjoy seeing William Sanderson (a.k.a. Larry of Larry, Darryl, and Darryl) playing a serious role as the one greaser who wasn’t killed by the train. Most of the other characters, including Jim’s wife and his students, are forgettable. The movie’s glaring weakness is the ghost greasers themselves. Even with their Satanic car and their threatening ways, they’re too cartoonish to be frightening. Sometimes They Come Back has its strengths but ultimately, it’s a middling Stephen King adaptation.

Great Moments In Television History #26: Siskel & Ebert Discuss Horror

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

This may not actually be a great moment in television history but it is an important one because it framed not only how horror films were discussed by many critics but it also is a big reason why many horror fans were not fans of this iconic duo. Despite Roger Ebert being one of the only critics to defend Wes Craven’s Last House On The Left when it was initially released, both he and Gene Siskel had a reputation for being anti-Horror. That reputation is largely due to a 1980 episode of Sneak Previews, in which they condemned what they called the “Women in Danger” horror films.

This originally aired on September 18th, 1980.

In Siskel & Ebert’s defense, they’re problem is more with slasher films than horror films. Do you agree with them? Siskel & Ebert criticized the way that audiences reacted to the films but is that the fault of the films or of the audience? Is it really fair to compare films like Don’t Answer The Phone and I Spit On Your Grave to films like Friday the 13th or When A Stranger Calls? It’s interesting to note that they defend Halloween as being an exception to the trend but Halloween was also a film that popularized showing scenes from the POV of the killer.

For a counter-point to this episode, check out a later episode in which Gene and Roger recommended horror films that they felt had been overlooked.

Previous Moments In Television History:

Horror Game Review: Zombie Blast 2023 (2022, Sam Ursu)

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

The year is 2023 and the zombie apocalypse has begun. First, you parents were killed. Then, your spouse was killed. All you have left is your baby and you are going to do whatever you need to do to protect the last remaining member of your family.

Zombie Blast 2023 starts out simply enough. You are in a house with four room. The baby is in one of the rooms. (The room changes each time that you play.) You have an axe. You have a shotgun that carries a limited amount of shells. You have a limited amount of energy and, if you don’t stop to rest occasionally, you’ll weaken and maybe even find yourself incapable of moving. You also have to find time to eat. Your number one objective is to protect the baby from the zombie horde that is approaching the house. Whenever a zombie gets in the house, you have to kill it before it reaches the baby’s room. As the game progresses, you can level up and become a better zombie killer but, at the same time, the number of zombies will also increase.

Zombie Blast 2023 is an addictive work of interactive fiction. I played it several times, trying out different strategies and seeing how long I could last before I was “overwhelmed.” As you level up and as the zombies become more aggressive it becomes a real challenge to try to make sure that you’re in the right place to kill them before they manage to get into whichever room the baby is in. Can you make it through to the morning? It’s not as easy you might think.

Play Zombie Blast 2023.

Horror Game Review: A Shift In The Night (2022, Muulk)

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

You have a job working the graveyard shift at a gas station in the desert. Because you have been hearing things coming from the backroom, you go to see a doctor. He tells you that hallucinations are an occupational hazzard for people who work overnight. He gives you some pills to control them. He says that you must take them every hour.

Feeling better about things, you go to work and discover that you left your pills at home. Can you survive the night?

A Shift In the Night is a work simulator where you attempt to get through your shift without dying. It’s not just the weird buzzing coming from the stockroom that’s a threat. There are also customers to deal with. Some of them are harmless. Some of them are crazy. One of them is definitely very dangerous. Good luck guessing which is which.

You would think that surviving an 8-hour night shift wouldn’t be that difficult but I have so far managed to die in four different ways while playing A Shift In The Night and absolutely none of those deaths were pleasant. The game uses graphics and sound effects to put you right in that gas station. When I was 18 and fresh out of high school, I worked nights part-time to help pay my college tuition and this game captures the atmosphere of the night shift. I always enjoyed the freedom of not having to deal with salaried management but I also knew that I had a greater chance of getting shot at night than during the day. This game brought back memories.

Play A Shift In The Night.

Music Video of the Day: The Garden by Guns N’ Roses (1993, directed by Del James)

Posted on October 23, 2022 by Jedadiah Leland

This was one of the few Guns N’ Roses’s videos to not get heavy play on MTV, perhaps because all of the members of the band appear to be either depressed or under the influence. Black-and-white shots of the sleaziest parts of New York are mixed with color footage of strippers. The video makes 1993 New York look so dangerous that it could almost be a Rudy Guiliani campaign commercial.

(Of course, we all know that it wasn’t New Yorkers fear of crime that elected Guiliani. It was their anger over Yogurt that falsely claimed to be low fat.)

Alice Cooper and the late Shannon Hoon can be heard providing background vocals on this song.

Enjoy!