Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 3.19 “Off Road”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, Ponch and Jon go to the desert!

Episode 3.19 “Off Road”

(Dir by Paul Nuckles, originally aired on February 2nd, 1980)

Though off-duty, Jon and Ponch continue to hang out together.  This weekend, they’re taking part in an off-road race at an old military bombing range in the desert.  They’re going to have look out for unexploded shells as they drive through the desert and try to make it to the finish line.  Since they’re cops, they will also have to deal with two crooks (Ramon Bieri and Michael Baselon) who are using the race as a cover to track down some stolen gold that they hid in the area.  Another racer (played by Edd Byrnes) also knows about the gold and he’s determined to get it as well.  And, of course, Ponch falls for two female racers who also end up getting involved in the search for the gold.

This is one of those episodes of CHiPs where Ponch and Jon show off the California lifestyle.  Whether it’s hang-gliding or sailing or offroad racing or handball, you can be sure that Ponch and Jon will try it at least once.  This episode is a bit of a throwback to the first season, in that Jon is the one who knows about off-road racing while Ponch is the one who learns what it’s all about.  Jon gets to be a mentor again, explaining the rules of the race while Ponch flashes his smile and leers at every woman who happens to walk by.

This episode actually spent more time with the people looking for the gold than it did with Ponch and Jon.  And I guess that’s okay because this is also one of those episodes where you can tell just how much Larry Wilcox and Erik Estrada disliked being in the same scene together.  Playing co-workers and close personal friends, Wilcox and Estrada have all the chemistry of two high school rivals forced to sit next to each other in summer school.  Wilcox barely looks at Estrada while talking to him.  Estrada continually flashes the Estrada smile in their scenes together, silently daring Wilcox to try and steal back the scene.  I was actually worried that Baker might end up abandoning Ponch in the desert but, fortunately, he didn’t and their adventures can continue.

Anyway, if you’re a car chase person, this was a fun episode.  If you’re watching for the stunts, this episode had quite a few.  The storyline was needlessly convoluted but the vehicles looked good and that’s what CHiPs is all about.

HAVOC (2025) review – Director Gareth Evans returns to action cinema! 


If you enjoy bone-crunching action filmmaking, Gareth Evans’ films THE RAID (2011) and THE RAID 2 (2014) are as good as it gets in the 21st century. When I saw that Evans had a new film coming to Netflix that stars a badass looking Tom Hardy, I have to admit I got excited. The trailer only increased my anticipation with its promise of stylized, intense action, as well as a cast that includes personal favorites like Timothy Olyphant (JUSTIFIED T.V. Series) and Forest Whitaker (GHOST DOG). I settled in front of my TV and hit play, with high hopes for HAVOC!

The film opens with conflicted police detective Walker (Tom Hardy) sharing words of regret via voiceover, and then immediately shifts to a high speed chase between an 18 wheeler and a bunch of cops. It is an intense scene that ends with washing machines filled with cocaine being thrown onto a trailing cop car! We soon learn that the big truck was being operated by Mia (Quelin Sepulvida) and Charlie (Justin Cornwell), the son of ethically challenged businessman Lawrence Beaumont (Forest Whitaker). It seems Charlie and Mia stole the drugs to pay off her debts to Chinese triads. When they go to a club to deliver the drugs, a group of masked men proceed to interrupt the drop and kill everybody, including the beloved son of the triad’s leader Tsui (Yann Yann Yeo). When Walker sees Charlie on security footage from the club, he goes to Beaumont, a man who knows his dirty secrets, and makes a deal. He’ll get his son back, and they’ll be square for life. Soon the triads are in town ready to hunt down and kill Charlie and Mia, who they believe are responsible for the massacre. Add to that a group of corrupt cops, led by Vincent (Timothy Olyphant), who also want Charlie and Mia dead, and detective Walker and his new partner Ellie (Jessie Mei Li) have their hands full on Christmas Eve! 

Here are some observations after my first viewing of HAVOC. First, Tom Hardy is a badass in the central role as Walker. I’ve been a fan of Hardy ever since he started breaking out in America after his performance in BRONSON (2008). I really loved him as Mad Max in FURY ROAD (2015). I’d never really envisioned him as this kind of action lead, but he definitely brings a certain gravitas to the role. Second, this movie feels like a bone crunching super hero movie at times, as it’s chock full of special effects. I found the action sequences featuring gunplay and hand to hand combat to be brutally awesome, but the car chase scenes aren’t quite up to the same standard. I mentioned the 18 wheeler chase in the plot description. As the scene plays out it’s a lot like watching an unrealistic chase scene from a later sequel to THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS franchise. It’s an exciting scene in a lot of ways, but it doesn’t seem set in the real world, which is a slight subtraction for me. Third, the movie is set on Christmas Eve, and I enjoy films that take place on holidays. We have a scene early in the film where “Father of the Year” Walker is buying his daughter’s Christmas gifts at a local convenience store. A little later, there’s a cool abduction scene that plays out to the sound of Bing Crosby singing “O Holy Night.” That’s good stuff. Fourth, director Evans seems to be trying to channel the spirit of 80’s and 90’s John Woo, as his film features an endless arsenal of weaponry, coupled with high emotions, and even a little classic music from an iconic scene in Woo’s own A BETTER TOMORROW (1986). No matter how many rounds are fired, there’s always more bullets or guns to be found as the last half of the film is almost nonstop action spread out over two amazing sets, first in a club and then at a cabin. And both of our featured parents, murderous triad leader Tsui and corrupt businessman Beaumont, get a chance to show their human sides by illustrating their sacrificial love for their children. Although HAVOC most certainly does not compare favorably to Woo’s HARD-BOILED, I can also see that Hong Kong classic being referenced here. Fifth, I’m a big fan of Timothy Olyphant, especially of his character Raylan Givens in the TV series JUSTIFIED. I had to forget Raylan on this night because his character here is an irredeemable piece of crap. Of course, Olyphant is excellent and delivers his evil with a smile on his face. 

Overall, I enjoyed HAVOC, but I don’t think it’s quite as good as either of the director’s RAID films, and that’s okay. I’d probably go with a solid 7 stars out of 10 for a rating. I love Hardy and Olyphant, who both bring their tremendous charisma to the table. I also enjoyed the many cool moments throughout the film leading to the action extravaganza that plays out at the end. It will be interesting to see how often I want to go back to this film in future years. I do know that if you enjoy action movies, you should definitely watch this film. Just don’t expect another RAID 2.

Juke Girl (1942, directed by Curtis Bernhardt)


Farm workers Steve (Ronald Reagan) and Danny (Richard Whorf) arrives in Florida, looking for work.  The whole town is controlled by the corrupt Henry Madden (Gene Lockhart) but the honest Steve would rather work for Nick (George Tobias), who treats his workers fairly.  While Steve romances Lola Mears (Ann Sheridan), who works at a “juke joint,” he also tries to organize the other workers into demanding better conditions.  When Madden frames Steve and Lola for a murder, the entire town turns against them.

This is not a bad Warner Bros. melodrama.  As with a lot of Warner Bros. films, the heroes are the poor workers who have found themselves exploited by wealthy men like Madden.  As played by Ronald Reagan, Steve is no radical firebrand.  He is just someone who wants the workers to get a fair shake and who wants to help decent bosses like Nick make a living despite the efforts of Madden to put them out of business.  As was so often the case with his movies, Reagan is an affable hero without ever actually being compelling.  Gene Lockhart is the dependably hateful villain and the cast is full of dependable character actors, including Faye Emerson, Alan Hale, Howard Da Silva, and Fuzzy Knight.

Ann Sheridan is really the main reason to Juke Girl and she’s as sexy and tough as ever.  There’s a reason why this movie was named for her character’s profession, even though its really only a minor part of the film.  Sheridan is the main attraction here and she gives a strong performance as a bad girl who is actually good underneath it all.  Her character worries that settling down with Steve will mean a lifetime of struggling to make ends meet but she sees that Steve is worth it by the end of the movie.  The town may not be worthy of either of them but Steve and Lola are meant to be together.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 4.3 “Death and the Lady”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, the Vice Squad investigates the “other Hollywood” and some notable guest stars pop up.

Episode 4.3 “Death and the Lady”

(Dir by Colin Bucksey, originally aired on October 16th, 1987)

Painter-turned-filmmaker Milton Glantz (Paul Guilfoyle) is very proud to have received an Erotic Film Award for his latest movie, Death and the Lady.  However, when Glantz receives his award, a man named Tulane Knox (Michael David Morrison) shouts that the violent murder that ends the film was real and that Glantz is a killer.

Knox is taken into custody by Gina and Trudy.  Crockett doesn’t believe a word that Knox is saying.  He’s convinced that it’s all just a publicity stunt to get people interested in the film.  Crockett doesn’t have much use for all that art film mumbo jumbo.  He lives on a boat with a crocodile named Elvis, after all.  Actually, it’s been a while since we’ve seen Elvis.  I hope he’s okay.

Still, Crockett investigates.  He and Tubbs discover that the actress from the film — Lori Swann (Kelly Lynch) — is still alive and working in the movies.  However, he also discovers that Lori and Glantz made another film, called Twins.  That film featured Lori and a woman named Amy Ryder, who looked just like her.  A conversation with Amy’s sister (Penelope Ann Miller) reveals that Amy hasn’t been seen for a while.  Plus, Amy has terminal cancer….

Especially when compared to the previous two episodes, this episode felt more like classic Miami Vice, dark, moody, and fatalistic.  It doesn’t take long for both the audience and Crockett to realize that Glantz murdered Amy for his film.  (Amy’s dead eyes appear in Glantz’s film.)  But the problem is that there’s no way for Crockett to prove it.  The District Attorney (Miguel Ferrer, making an early appearance) refuses to bring charges without hard evidence.  When Glantz taunts Crockett with the fact that he committed the perfect murder, Crockett snaps.  He beats up Glantz but he doesn’t kill him.  Crockett hasn’t crossed that line but, watching this episode, you get the feeling that it’s only a matter of time.  But it doesn’t matter how many times Crockett throws a punch, Milton Glantz gets away with murder.

This was the Miami Vice of old, depressing, distressing, and very, very stylish.

(Plus, there’s a kitty in this episode!  He is discovered in a cocaine dealer’s home and he’s given to Gina as a present.  Even Castillo smiles when looks at the kitty.  Awwww!)

#MondayMuggers presents DARK ANGEL (1990) starring Dolph Lundgren!


Every Monday night at 9:00 Central Time, my wife Sierra and I host a “Live Movie Tweet” event on X using the hashtag #MondayMuggers. We rotate movie picks each week, and our tastes are quite different. Tonight, Monday May 5th, we celebrate Cinco de Mayo with DARK ANGEL (1990) starring Dolph Lundgren, Brian Benben, Betsy Brantley, Matthias Hues, and Michael J. Pollard. 

I really enjoy Amazon Prime’s plot description for the film… “A renegade cop undercover on a drug sting discovers a murderous alien who feasts on the brains of heroin addicts.” Honestly, if that description doesn’t make you want to watch the film, there’s probably nothing I can say to bring you along. On a side note, I remember this movie going under the name I COME IN PEACE when I was in high school, which is kind of cool because the bad guy will say he comes in peace right before committing horrific murder. But now it’s called DARK ANGEL, so that’s that.

So join us tonight for #MondayMuggers and watch DARK ANGEL! It’s on Amazon Prime. The trailer is included below:

Scenes I Love: Simon and The Devil Go To The Future In Simon Of The Desert


From Luis Bunuel’s 1965 short film, Simon of the Desert, the faithful Simon (Claudio Brook) finds himself transported from 6th Century Syria to the 1960s by the Devil (Silvia Pinal).  The song playing at the club is called Radioactive Flesh.  Simon wants to go home.  The Devil wants to dance.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Cinco De Mayo Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Happy Cinco De Mayo to all of our readers!  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Great Mexican Films

Simon of the Desert (1965, dir by Luis Bunuel, DP: Gabriel Figueroa)

Like Water For Chocolate (1992, dir by Alfonso Arau, DP: Emmanuel Lubezki)

Cronos (1993, dir by Guillermo del Toro, DP: Guillermo Navarra)

Pan’s Labyrinth (2006, dir by Guillermo del Toro, DP: Guillermo Navarro)

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us for Truth or Dare? A Critical Madness!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasion ally Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be an encore presentation of Truth or Dare?  A Critical Madness, from director Tim Ritter!

It should make for a night of fun viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto Mastodon, pull up Truth or Dare on YouTube, start the movie at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!

Enjoy!

Song of the Day: Killer Queen (by Queen)


Time to continue our greatest guitar solos series with another from the glam rock legends that is Queen.

The latest “Song of the Day” is “Killer Queen” from their third album Sheer Heart Attack released in 1974. The song continues the band’s exceptional use of vocal harmonies which, by 1974, had become the band’s signature calling musical card.

Brian May’s guitar solo happens on the 1:32 minute mark of the song. It’s not a bombastic, shredding-inducing melodies, but instead a multitracked solo that makes great use of bell chords where the drums and bass joins in sequentially to finish the section.

“Killer Queen” has become one of the band’s most popular songs and continued to cement Queen as one of the preeminent rock bands of the 1970’s.

Killer Queen

She keeps Moët et Chandon
In her pretty cabinet
“Let them eat cake,” she says
Just like Marie Antoinette
A built-in remedy
For Khrushchev and Kennedy (Ooh, ooh)
At anytime an invitation
You can’t decline (Ooh, ooh)

Caviar and cigarettes
Well versed in etiquette
Extraordinarily nice

She’s a killer queen
Gunpowder, gelatin
Dynamite with a laser beam
Guaranteed to blow your mind
(Pa-pa-pa-pa) Anytime
Ooh
Recommended at the price
Insatiable an appetite
Wanna try?

To avoid complications
She never kept the same address
In conversation
She spoke just like a baroness
Met a man from China
Went down to Geisha Minah (Ooh, ooh)
(Killer, killer, she’s a killer queen)
Then again incidentally
If you’re that way inclined

Perfume came naturally from Paris (Naturally)
For cars, she couldn’t care less
Fastidious and precise

She’s a killer queen
Gunpowder, gelatin
Dynamite with a laser beam
Guaranteed to blow your mind
(Pa-pa-pa-pa)
Anytime
 
[guitar solo]

Drop of a hat she’s as willing as
Playful as a pussycat (Ooh)
Then momentarily out of action (Ooh)
Temporarily out of gas (Ta-taaa)
To absolutely drive you wild, wild
She’s out to get you

She’s a killer queen
Gunpowder, gelatin
Dynamite with a laser beam (Pa-pa-pa-ra)
Guaranteed to blow your mind
Anytime
Ooh
Recommended at the price
Insatiable an appetite
Wanna try?
You wanna try

Great Guitar Solos Series