Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.5 “The Dutch Oven”

Posted on March 11, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

Well, this sucks! Tubi is no longer streaming Miami Vice. Hopefully, the show will soon have a new streaming home. As for the episode that I reviewed below, I had to buy it on Prime. It cost next to nothing but still, there’s a larger issue, namely my desire to watch stuff for free.

Episode 2.4 “The Dutch Oven”

(Dir by Abel Ferrara, originally aired on October 25th, 1985)

This week’s episode of Miami Vice opens with a typical Vice situation. Trudy is undercover as a prostitute. Tubbs is undercover as a drug buyer. When the dealers try to rip Tubbs off, it leads to an exciting and well-shot car chase that ends in an alley. One of the dealers points his gun at Sonny and Trudy and, four shots later, he’s lying dead on the ground.

For once, though, it’s not Sonny who did the shooting. Instead, all four shots were fired by Trudy. This time, it’s Trudy who is shaken by taking someone’s life and it’s Trudy who finds herself being harassed by Internal Affairs. Feeling lost, Trudy goes to a party hosted by her ex-boyfriend, David (Cleavant Derricks). Soon, Trudy and David are back together but, when Trudy discovers that someone is dealing drugs at David’s parties, she is forced to confront the fact that her boyfriend might not be an innocent bystander.

A young Giancarlo Esposito appears in this episode, playing an up-and-coming dealer named Adonis. Adonis is an old friend of David’s and he’s also the one who is responsible for selling the drugs at the parties. (It turns out that David actually is innocent.) Sonny, realizing that Trudy is too close to the case and still emotionally shaken by the earlier shooting, goes undercover to take Adonis down. Of course, Adonis doesn’t surrender easily and the episode ends with him literally daring Trudy to shoot him. Trudy hesitates so Sonny sends Adonis to the ground with one punch. As far as endings go, it doesn’t quite feel like a Miami Vice ending. Season one, for instance, had no hesitation about ending with gunshots. Gina shot Burt Young in cold blood. Pam Grier killed several drug dealers and apparently got away with it. Bruce Willis’s wife shot him on the courthouse steps. Dennis Farina was shot in his car at the end of Lombard. This episode, though, ends with Sonny demonstrating that he can make arrests without killing people and with Trudy still not having to deal with her fear of using her weapon. It feels a bit wishy-washy, to be honest.

On the plus side, Abel Ferrara does a good job directing this episode. The opening action scene is genuinely exciting and the entire episode is permeated with a melancholy atmosphere. This episode deserves some credit for acknowledging that the Vice detectives spend a lot of time investigating and arresting people with whom they’ve become friends. And it’s good that, after spending so much time in the background, Trudy finally got a showcase episode and Olivia Brown got a chance to prove she could carry a story. This is an effective episode, even if it never quite becomes a classic.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.4 “Out Where The Buses Don’t Run”

Posted on February 26, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, we learn the cost of working Vice.

Episode 2.4 “Out Where The Buses Don’t Run”

(Dir by Jim Johnston, originally aired on October 18th, 1985)

This is it. This is the episode that is regularly cited as being one of the best, if not the best, episodes that Miami Vice ever aired. Out Where The Buses Don’t Run takes a look at the psychological costs of spending one’s life obsessing on crime and justice. What starts out as a comedy turns into the bleakest episode of the show so far.

Things get off to a great start, with Crockett and Tubbs pursuing a drug dealer on the beach. While The Who’s Baba O’Riley plays on the soundtrack, the dealer roller skates down a sidewalk and a preacher (played by Little Richard) sends his young congregation out to collect money. As Crockett and Tubbs wait for their chance to arrest the dealer, someone watches them from a nearby window and takes pictures. Crockett asks Tubbs if he ever gets the feeling that he’s being watched.

The man taking the pictures turns out to be Hank Weldon (Bruce McGill), a former Vice cop who quit the force six years prior when a case that he had spent three years making fell apart and a drug lord was set free on a technicality. The drug lord vanished after the case against him was thrown out and it’s assumed that he was murdered by his associates. Hank, however, insists that the drug lord is still alive and he’s returned to Miami. He wants Crockett and Tubbs to help him finally catch the criminal that evaded him all those years before.

A quick check with Weldon’s former partner, Marty Lang (David Strathairn), reveals that Weldon left the force after he had a nervous breakdown and he’s spent the past few years in a mental facility. The loud and flamboyant Weldon is obviously still unstable but Crockett and Tubbs cannot shake the feeling that he might know what he’s talking about.

And, as is revealed at this end of this episode, they’re right …. kind of. Weldon does know where the missing drug lord is. The drug lord is walled up in an abandoned building. He’s been there since 1979. At the end of episode, with Tubbs, Crockett, Castillo, and Lang watching, Weldon tears down the wall and reveals the decayed skeleton of the drug lord. Weldon announces that he murdered him and walled him up. Lang then reveals that he helped.

“He was my partner,” Lang says, “Understand?”

Crockett understands and the audience understands as well. When Weldon’s obsession drove him crazy, Lang was the only one to whom he could turn. And Lang, being his partner, was the only one who understood how he felt. Lang may have been a cop but his number one loyalty was to his partner, just as Crockett’s number one loyalty will always be to Tubbs.

As played by Bruce McGill, Hank Weldon goes from being a cheerful eccentric to a bitter and paranoid lunatic to, finally, a man who can no longer stand to hide what he’s done. It’s an excellent performance that keeps the audience guessing. He may be a murderer and he’s obviously still unstable but your heart can’t help but break for him. The combination of Jim Johnston’s moody direction, a perfect collection of songs on the soundtrack, and the performances of Bruce McGill and David Strathairn really do come together to make this an excellent episode. In the end, it’s hard not to feel that Crockett and Tubbs are both one step away from becoming Weldon and Lang themselves.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.3 “Whatever Works”

Posted on February 19, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, we learn how Sonny affords all of those wonderful toys.

Episode 2.3 “Whatever Works”

(Dir by John Nicolella, originally aired on October 4th, 1985)

Have you ever wondered how Sonny Crockett afford that nice Ferrari on just a cop’s salary? To be honest, it hadn’t really occurred to me. I just assumed that everyone in the 80s owned a Ferrari. I’ve been more concerned with how Sonny manages to maintain his undercover identity despite the fact that he spends almost all of his time hanging out with his fellow cops. I mean, surely, someone in the Miami underworld has noticed that “Sonny Burnett” sure does seem to have a lot of friends who worked Vice.

Regardless, in this episode, we learn that Sonny doesn’t actually own the Ferrari. Instead, it’s a vehicle that the department loans to Sonny so that he can maintain his cover. Apparently, the Ferrari once belonged to an actual drug dealer. Unfortunately, the Miami Police Department desperately needs to make some money at their next police auction so Maxwell Dierks (Robert Trebor), a weaselly bureaucrat, decides to repossess Sonny’s Ferrari and auction it off.

Sonny spends most of this episode obsessing on his car. While the rest of the Vice Squad laughs at Sonny’s misfortune, local informant Izzy Moreno tries to trick Dierks into giving him the car so that he can return it to Sonny. I hope Sonny appreciates who his true friends are. Anyway, Castillo eventually pulls some strings to save Sonny’s car. Maybe Sonny should have gone to him in the first place but, then again, Castillo is kind of intimidating. He literally never smiles.

While Sonny is obsessing on his car, someone is killing cops and leaving behind Santeria charms. Despite having grown up in Florida and being a veteran vice detective, it appears that Sonny has never before heard of Santeria. However, Castillo and Tubbs know all about it. Castillo is even friends with a Santeria priestess (Eartha Kitt) who explains that the killers did not view the cops as being policemen but instead as being fellow criminals.

It turns out that there’s a group of cops who have been shaking down drug dealers and now, they’re being killed one-by-one. For all the talk of Santeria, the solution to the problem is actually pretty straight forward. The Vice squad tracks down the people doing the killing and, after a shoot-out, the bad guys surrender. And that’s the end of that.

Oh, this episode. It had potential but it just fell flat. The Santeria stuff felt tacked on and it was pretty obvious that the episode’s writers were more interested in Sonny trying to get his car back than in the episode’s main storyline. Even the Eartha Kitt cameo felt a bit perfunctory.

On the plus side, this episode did feature a band singing Bang A Gong in the middle of a bar fight. That was pretty cool. The band was called Power Station and apparently, it was an off-shoot of Duran Duran. What’s interesting is that the members of the band are portrayed as being old friends of Sonny, to the extent that they applaud him as he beats up a bad cop. It brings a real “The name is Dalton” energy to the scene.

This week’s episode was a bit disappointing but next week’s episode is apparently a classic. I look forward to watching and reviewing Out Where The Buses Don’t Run.

Retro Television Reviews: Miami Vice 2.1 and 2.2 “The Prodigal Son”

Posted on February 12, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the second season with a two-hour long premiere! Crockett and Tubbs are going to New York!

Episode 2.1 and 2.2 “The Prodigal Son”

(Dir by Paul Michael Glaser, originally aired on September 27th, 1985)

The second season premiere of Miami Vice opens with a series of set pieces.

In Panama, Crockett and Tubbs visit a secret military base in the jungle and are disgusted to learn how the Panamanian military gets information about drug smugglers. Tubbs and Crockett find one horribly tortured man in a tent. Tubbs gives him a drink of water and gets what information he can from the man. Crockett and Tubbs leave the tent. A gunshot rings out as the involuntary informant is executed. When the shot rings out, both Crockett and Tubbs turn back to the tent in slow motion, stunned by the brutality of their allies in the Drug War. Indeed, it’s hard not to compare the scene to the famous photograph of a South Vietnamese general executing a communist during the Vietnam War.

The Vietnam analogy continues with the next scene. In the Everglades, Crockett, Tubbs, and the entire Vice Squad work with the DEA to ambush the Revilla cousins as they bring drugs into the U.S. Sitting in the swamp, Crockett compares the experience to Vietnam, suggesting that the war on the drugs is just as futile and as costly. And indeed, it’s hard not to notice that every drug dealer that Crockett and Tubbs has taken down over the course of this show has immediately been replaced by another. The Revillas are just another in a long line of people getting rich off of other people’s addictions.

After the bust goes down, Crockett and Tubbs arrives at a celebratory party, just to discover that almost of all of the undercover DEA agents have been murdered and Gina has been seriously wounded. There is something very haunting about this scene, with Crockett and Tubbs rushing through a penthouse and seeing a dead body in almost every room.

At a meeting in a stark office, the head DEA agent explains that his agency has been compromised and all of his undercover agents have been unmasked. Someone has to go to New York and work undercover to take down the Revillas but it can’t be any of his people. Since the Revillas are smuggling their stuff in through Miami, Miami Vice has jurisdiction. Paging Crockett and Tubbs!

Working undercover as Burnett and Cooper, Crockett and Tubbs visit a low-level drug dealer (played by Gene Simmons) who lives on a yacht and who gives them the name of a connection in New York City.

From there, Miami Vice moves to New York City, where Crockett and Tubbs meet a low-level criminal named Jimmy Borges (played by an almost impossibly young Penn Jillette) and they try to infiltrate the Revilla organization. Along the way, Tubbs meets up with Valerie (Pam Grier) and discovers that she has apparently lost herself working undercover. Meanwhile, Crockett has a brief — and kind of weird — romance with a photographer named Margaret (Susan Hess).

(“I like guns,” she says when Crockett demands to know why she stole his.)

With Crockett and Tubbs leaving Miami for New York in order to get revenge for a colleague who was wounded during an operation, The Prodigal Son almost feels like the pilot in reverse. Also, much like the pilot, the exact details of The Prodigal Son‘s story are often less important than how the story is told. This episode is full of moody shots of our heroes walking through New York while songs like You Belong To The City play on the soundtrack. (There’s also a song from Phil Collins, undoubtedly included to bring back memories of the In The Air Tonight scene from the pilot.) It’s all very entertaining to watch, even if the story itself doesn’t always make total sense. Indeed, you really do have to wonder how all of these criminals keep falling for Sonny’s undercover identity as Sonny Burnett. You would think that someone would eventually notice that anyone who buys from Sonny Burnett seems to get busted the very next day.

Stylish as the storytelling may be, this episode actually does have something on its mind. Those lines comparing the War on Drugs to the Vietnam Conflict was not just throwaways. Towards the end of the episode, Crockett and Tubbs follow a lead to the offices of J.J. Johnston (Julian Beck, the ghost preacher from Poltergeist II). The skeletal Johnston is an investor of some sort. He has no problem admitting that he’s involved in the drug trade, presumably because he knows that there’s nothing Crockett and Tubbs can do to touch him. Upon meeting the two cops, he immediately tells them exactly how much money they have in their checking accounts. He points out that they’re poor and they’re fighting a losing war whereas he’s rich and he’s making money off of a losing war. Beck gives a wonderfully smug performance as Johnston and it should be noted that, of all of the episode’s villains, he’s the only one who is not brought to any sort of justice. Val almost loses herself. Tubbs and Crockett don’t even get a thank you for their hard work. The somewhat sympathetic Jimmy Borges ends up dead while the Revillas were undoubtedly been replaced by even more viscous dealers. Meanwhile, J.J. Johnston relaxes in his office and counts his money. This is the No Country For Old Men of Miami Vice episodes.

This episode is also full of familiar faces. Charles S. Dutton, Kevin Anderson, Anthony Heald, Miguel Pinero, James Russo, Bill Smtirovich, Zoe Tamerlis, Paul Calderon, and Louis Guzman, they all show up in small roles and add to show’s rather surreal atmosphere. This is Miami Vice at its most dream-like, full of people you think you might know despite the fact that they’re doing things of which you don’t want to be a part.

As for the title, The Prodigal Son is Tubbs and he is tempted to stay in New York City. But, in the end, he joins Crockett on that flight back to Miami. It’s his home.

Retro Television Reviews: Miami Vice 1.22 “Lombard”

Posted on February 5, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The 21st episode of Miami Vice is Evan. It’s regularly listed as being one of the best episodes of the show and it’s not available to stream online. Apparently, this is due to someone referring to another character as being a “faggot.” Yes, it’s a dirty word but I’m an adult and I do think that I could handle hearing the word and figuring out the context of why it was used. Censorship sucks so shame on Prime, Tubi, NBC, and everyone else who is involved in not streaming Evan.

With Evan not available to be viewed, I moved on to the first season finale.

Episode 1.22 “Lombard”

(Dir by John Nicollela, originally aired on May 10th, 1985)

The first season of Miami Vice comes to an end with a rather simple story. Lombard (Dennis Farina) is a crime lord, a first-generation Italian-American whose father lived an honest life and who died poor as a result. Lombard did what he had to do to get ahead and, as a result, he’s now a very rich man who lives on a boat.

He’s also being targeted by both rival gangsters and the law. When Lombard agrees to testify against the Mafia in return for immunity, Crockett and Tubbs are assigned to babysit him until the trial. Crockett and Tubbs are both weary of Lombard but Lombard turns out to be a charming guy with a sense of ethics. He cooks them a big Italian dinner. He entertain them with stories. Crockett and Tubbs start to like the guy, even if guarding him means that they get involved in a few mob shootouts.

However, when it comes time to testify, Lombard refuses. Under the immunity deal, he’s no longer qualified to plead the fifth but Lombard does just that. Repeatedly, he pleads the fifth and, as a result, he gets enough contempt citations that he’s probably looking at least a decade in jail, regardless of the fact that he didn’t admit to any of the major crimes that he committed.

Sonny and Tubbs are impressed. Lombard may be a criminal but he has a sense of honor. He doesn’t snitch. He’s not a rat. Of course, that doesn’t make a difference to the criminals who apparently gun him down in the episode’s final ambiguous freeze frame.

The story was simple and, to be honest, it wasn’t anything that Miami Vice hadn’t already done. But the episode works, because of Dennis Farina’s charismatic performance as Lombard and John Nicolella’s stylish and moody direction. The first season of Miami Vice ends much as it began, with ambiguity and defeat. Lombard scores a moral victory but is gunned down minutes afterwards. Crockett and Tubbs keep Lombard alive just long enough for him to double-cross the authorities. In the end, the ruthless gangster turns out to have more honor than the people prosecuting him and Crockett and Tubbs are again forced to consider that there’s not a lot of difference between them and the people that they’re chasing.

Next week …. it’s time for Season 2!

Retro Television Reviews: Miami Vice 1.20 “Nobody Lives Forever”

Posted on January 29, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Sorry, it’s been a busy day and I’m a little bit medicated and, as a result, this review is posting later than expected. Fortunately, this week’s episode is also about someone struggling to keep up with their schedule. Read on!

Episode 1.20 “Nobody Lives Forever”

(Dir by Jim Johnston, originally aired on March 29th, 1985)

Nobody lives forever, the title tells us. That’s certainly true in 1980s Miami.

Three teenage punks have gone on a crime spree, killing innocent civilians and criminals alike. The punks (who are played by Frank Military, Michael Carmine, and Lionel Chute) are initially easy to laugh off because of how over the top they are. When they decide to go to the beach and rob a bookie, they start chanting, “Bookie! Bookie!” But, just because they’re ludicrous, that doesn’t make them any less dangerous. From the very first scene, they’re shooting at people and laughing like maniacs. As informant Izzy Moreno puts it, these are three guys who know that “they’re already dead.” They’ve got both the police and the mob (represented by Peter Friedman and a young Giancarlo Esposito) after them. They might as well go out in a blaze of glory.

What else would you expect from three people who drive this car?

Vice is after the teenagers but, for once, Sonny Crockett has got other things on his mind. Sonny is dating a wealthy architect named Brenda (Kim Greist) and he’s spending all of his free time at her mansion. Even when he’s working the streets, Sonny is thinking about Brenda. He misses a chance to capture the three teens because he is too busy talking to Brenda on the phone. Later, Tubbs gets severely beaten up because Brenda allowed Sonny to oversleep and Tubbs had to go on a stakeout alone.

Brenda asks Sonny if it’s true that a cop partnership is like a marriage and this episode certainly suggests it is and an obsessive one at that. All of the members of the Vice Squad get annoyed with Sonny for finding happiness off the grubby streets of Miami. Castillo doesn’t think Sonny is focused. Tubbs thinks that Sonny is losing his edge. Gina is upset that Sonny led her on earlier in the season. Switek and Zito …. well, they’re too busy reading comic books to really care much about Sonny’s problems.

There are several artfully composed shots of Sonny and Brenda floating in her pool and discussing how Sonny can go from having a gun pulled on him to relaxing at home without missing a beat. Don Johnson and Kim Greist had a lot of chemistry and it’s impossible not to feel bad when Sonny realizes that he can either be Brenda’s lover or he can be a cop but he can’t be both.

In the end, the punks end up getting gunned down by Vice and Sonny ends the best relationship he’s ever had. And Tubbs? He sits on the beach and plays his saxophone.

That’s life in Miami.

Retro Television Reviews: Miami Vice 1.19 “The Home Invaders”

Posted on January 22, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Crockett and Castillo take down some home invaders. Yes, Crockett and Castillo. Not Crockett and Tubbs. Read on to find out why.

Episode 1.19 “The Home Invaders”

(Dir by Abel Ferrara, originally produced by March 15th, 1985)

Always do your research.

Philip Michael Thomas does not appear in this episode of Miami Vice. At the start of the episode, it’s mentioned that he’s in New York, visiting Valerie Gordon. It’s a line that sounds like it was written at the spur of the moment and, when I heard it, I assumed that there had been some sort of behind-the-scenes drama between Thomas and the producers. Fortunately, before I went with that and said something snarky, I actually looked up the reason for Thomas’s absence and I discovered that he was injured performing a stunt in the previous episode. Thomas missed this episode because he was recovering. As well, this was the only episode that he missed during the entire run of Miami Vice.

Thomas may be absent but that doesn’t mean that crime is going to take a break in Miami. A series of violent home invasions lead to Crockett and Castillo getting temporarily assigned to the robbery division. Crockett is excited to be working under his former boss and mentor, Lt. John Malone (Jack Kehoe). Castillo quickly realizes that Malone has gotten rusty and that his investigation into the robberies has been sloppy.

This is a moody episode, with the emphasis as much on Crockett’s disillusionment with his old boss as with the efforts to catch the home invaders. That said, the home invaders are a scary bunch. Led by Esai Morales and David Patrick Kelly, they are totally ruthless and willing to kill anyone who fails to move quickly enough. The scenes in which they break into various mansions and threaten the inhabitants are difficult to watch and it definitely captures the trauma of having your personal space invaded and your sense of safety destroyed.

(When I was 17, our house was broken into and, for months, I couldn’t sleep through the night. Almost every night, I was woken up by what I thought was the sound of someone breaking into my house and I would end up walking through the house in my nightclothes, carrying a golf club for protection. One night, I nearly hit my sister when she came out of the kitchen with a midnight snack. It may sound funny now but, at the time, it was terrifying.)

It ends with a shootout that’s violent even by the standards of Miami Vice. Castillo and Crockett gun down the bad guys and it’s hard not to notice that, while Crockett seems to be clearly upset by the fact that he had to kill a few men, Castillo barely shows any emotion at all. Castillo is effective because he holds back his feelings about everything. That’s also why Castillo, and not Crockett, is capable of seeing that Lt. Malone is past his prime. With the home invaders neutralized, Malone tells Crockett that he’s quitting the force. His days of being an effective detective are over. The job and all of the terrible stuff that he deals with on a daily basis has left him burned out and it’s hard not to notice that he and Crockett are the same age. Fighting crime in Miami takes a toll.

This episode was directed by Abel Ferrara, who keeps the action moving quickly and who fills the screen with ennui-drenched images of people who are not sure whether they’re making any difference at all. This is an effective episode, even without the presence of Ricardo Tubbs.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 1.18 “Made For Each Other”

Posted on January 15, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, two supporting players get an episode all their own.

Episode 1.18 “Made For Each Other”

(Dir by Rob Cohen, originally aired on March 8th, 1985)

After spending most of the first season as background comedic relief, Detectives Switek (Michael Talbott) and Zito (John Diehl) are at the center of this week’s episode of Miami Vice.

With the Vice Squad trying to make a case against criminal fence John Costeleda (Johnny “Vatos” Hernandez), Switek and Zito recruit two informants — Noogie (Charlie Barnett) and Izzy (Martin Ferrero) — and send them in undercover to get close to Costeleda’s lieutenant, an electronic store owner named “Bonzo” Barry Gold (Mark Linn-Baker). For once, it’s Zito and Switek who are pushing ethical boundaries to take down the bad guy though, notably, they never get quite as angsty about it as either Crockett or Tubbs. If Crockett and Tubbs are secretly aware that they’re fighting a losing war against crime, Switek and Zito are a bit more earnest in their outlook.

This episode also takes a look at Switek and Zito’s life outside of Vice. Zito likes to take care of fish and is something of an eccentric. Switek is dating Darlene (Ellen Greene), who used to date Zito. Switek is also a big fan of Elvis, though Darlene has tossed almost all of his Elvis stuff out of the apartment and instead replaced it with pictures of Princess Diana and baby Harry. (Prince Harry’s father is not seen in any of the pictures. Neither is the future King Charles III.) When Zito’s house explodes due to a gas leak, he moves in with Switek and Darlene. Darlene is not particularly happy about that and, by the end of the episode, Switek has decided that his partner is more important to him than his girlfriend. As the title says, Switek and Zito are made for each other.

I like the fact that Miami Vice would occasionally allow people other than Crockett and Tubbs to headline an episode. After all, the show is called Miami Vice and there’s more to the Vice Squad than just Crockett’s houseboat and Tubbs’s fake Jamaican accent. Michael Talbott and especially John Diehl are both likable in their roles, with Diehl in particular making Zito into the type of strange guy who you can’t help but love. That said, this episode was a bit too silly for its own good. It would have been interesting to see Zito and Switek go after the type of criminals that Crockett and Tubbs regularly went after but instead, Costeleda was too much of a buffoon to really be a serious threat. The emphasis here was on comedy but Miami Vice works better as a serious show with funny moments than as a funny show with serious moments.

It was nice to see that Zito and Switek were made for each other but, otherwise, this episode never worked as well as one might hope.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 1.17 “The Maze”

Posted on January 8, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

It was not easy but I managed to rouse myself from my sickbed long enough to stumble into my home office so I could watch and review this week’s episode of Miami Vice!

Episode 1.17 “The Maze”

(Dir by Tim Zinnemann, originally aired on February 22nd, 1985)

This episode of Miami Vice gets off to a good start, with an exciting and, even by the standards of today, surprisingly violent shoot-out in downtown Miami. The shoot-out leaves one cop dead, one partner embittered, and Crockett and Tubbs looking for the perpetrators, the Escobars. As Tubbs explains it, the Escobars were strictly small-timers but it appears that they’ve recently gotten out of prison and now they are trying to make a name for themselves in Miami.

The search for the Escobars leads Crockett and Tubbs to a seemingly abandoned apartment building that has been nicknamed “The Maze.” The Escobars have taken over the building and now, the handful of people who were previously living in the Maze are virtual hostages. With the police surrounding the Maze, Tubbs decides to go undercover as a drifter who just happens to drop by the Maze in search of a place to stay. Of course, no sooner has Tubbs entered into the Maze then a renegade cop named Duryea (Jay O. Sanders) decides to rush the building himself and the police are forced to reveal themselves. Realizing that they’re surrounded, the Escobars demand a helicopter to the Bahamas and $10,000. (Personally, I think they should have just asked for the helicopter. People will give up helicopters much quicker than money.) They hold every person in the building hostage, including Tubbs.

As I previously mentioned while reviewing T and T, I’m not a fan of shows that center around hostage situations, largely because they almost always end up being dramatically inert. There’s only so many times that you can watch a sweaty criminal demand a helicopter before you get bored with listening to him. That is certainly the case here. The show gets off to a good start and even the scenes with Tubbs breaking into the Maze and pretending to be a Jamaican drifter had some flair to them. But once the tense hostage situation started up, I got bored. I appreciated the fact that the Escobars, as opposes to being hardened criminals, were really just as scared as the people they were holding hostage but otherwise, this episode was just a bit too slow for me.

That said, this episode does feature Breakin 2‘s Adolfo ‘Shabba-Doo’ Quinones as a dancing informant, early performances from Joe Morton and Ving Rahmes, and a really cool moment where Tubbs smirks and says, “Nobody’s going to the Bahamas.” Even a lesser episode of Miami Vice still had style to burn.

Retro Television Reviews: Miami Vice 1.16 “Rites of Passage”

Posted on January 1, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Pam Grier and John Turturro show up in Miami!

Episode 1.16 “Rites of Passage”

(Dir by David Anspaugh, originally aired on February 8th, 1985)

This week’s episode of Miami Vice opens with a 5-minute mini-movie. Before we even get to the opening credits, we have watched as young and innocent Diane Gordon (Terry Ferman) arrives in Miami from New York, takes her first walk on a Florida beach, has a “chance” meeting with a smooth-talking guy named Lile (David Thornton), and ends up at a party being held at a mansion belonging to David Traynor (a young John Turturro). Traynor tells Diane that he runs a modeling agency and that he would love to put her under contract.

It’s a stylish and rather brave opening. For five minutes, we don’t see or even hear about any of the regular characters. Instead, we’re introduced to world where image is everything, from the bodies on the beach to Traynor’s art deco mansion to the beautiful women who have been paid for by considerably less attractive men. In those five minutes, Diane wins our sympathy and we also see how she (and so many others) have fallen into the trap set by the David Traynors of the world. For those five minutes, we are reminded that this is a show about more than Sonny Crockett and Ricardo Tubbs. It’s about more than even Miami. This is a show about America.

After the opening credits, we watch as the police retrieve the body of one of Traynor’s girls from a lagoon. She committed suicide. In the crowd watching is Diane’s sister, Valerie (played by the legendary Pam Grier). Valerie is a New York cop. When she goes to the Vice Squad to ask for Castillio’s help in searching for her sister, we learn that she is also Tubbs’s former (and soon current) lover.

In many ways, the rest of this episode is traditional Miami Vice. Zito and Switek provide some comic relief when they disguise themselves as exterminators and invade one of Traynor’s parties. Crockett and Tubbs once again go undercover as Burnett and Cooper, infiltrating Traynor’s mansion so that they can rescue Diane. Diane has been so brainwashed by Traynor and Lile that, even after she’s been reunited with her sister, she still can’t bring herself to admit that Traynor was using her. She calls Traynor and tells him that she’s decided to go back to New York City. In a montage that is rather creepily scored to Foreigner’s I Want To Know What Love Is, scenes of Valerie and Tubbs making love are mixed with scenes of Lile giving Diane an intentional drug overdose.

Technically, this is a Tubbs episode. For once, of the two main detectives, Tubbs is the one who has a personal reason for wanting to take Traynor down while it falls to Crockett to deal with Castillo’s withering stare of concern. That said, Rites of Passage is Pam Grier’s show all the way. From the minute that Grier shows up, she controls every scene in which she appears. Just as in Coffy, Grier plays an avenging angel. This episode ends, as Miami Vice often did, with a shoot out but this time, it’s Grier who guns down Lile and Traynor. “Read me my rights,” Valerie says to Crockett as the episode ends.

Again, the storyline may have been typical Vice but the performance of Pam Grier and the stylish direction of David Anspaugh elevated the episode. This episode presents Miami as being beautiful but heartless, a place where innocents come to pursue the American dream but instead find themselves being used and abused by sleazy but wealthy men. (At one point, it is mentioned that Traynor specializes in finding women for diplomats, meaning that most of his clients have diplomatic immunity.) Traynor’s mansion is a brilliant combination of the sleek and the tacky and Turturro plays Traynor as being a not particularly clever man who has gotten rich because he understands that everyone ultimately driven by the same desire for power and pleasure without consequences.

Next week …. it’s another Tubbs episode! Can Tubbs defuse a hostage situation, despite not having an ex-lover around to help him? We’ll find out!