Enjoy!
Enjoy!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!
This week, the departed return!
Episode 2.21 “Wedding in Black”
(Dir by Rodney Charters, originally aired on May 8th, 1989)
In South America, a man named Calvin Collier (Stephen Meadows) is carrying around a snow globe and strangling women. After he kills a young Jill Hennessy (credited here with playing “Spanish Hooker,”), Calvin is taken to prison. However, an ominous voice says that it has need of Calvin’s soul.
In Africa, Brother Antonio (Guy Bannerman) is caught trying to rape a woman and is promptly set on fire.
In America (or maybe Canada), Maya Zedler (Carolyn Dunn) is released from prison and promptly kills herself.
What do all three of these people have in common? They all know the folks at Curious Goods! Calvin is a friend of Micki’s. Brother Antonio is an acquaintance of Jack’s. Maya used to be Ryan’s girlfriend. And even though all three of them are now dead, Lucifer sent them back into the world of the living because he’s decided that he wants Micki to give birth to his child.
Calvin and Antonio show up and draw Micki and Jack out of the store and into a sudden blizzard. Suddenly, all four of them find themselves in the castle that sits in the middle of Calvin’s snow globe. Calvin sets about trying to seduce Micki on behalf of Lucifer.
Meanwhile, Maya shows up and tries to keep Ryan distracted so that he won’t go looking for Micki and Jack. However, it turns out that Maya still has a conscience and eventually, she turns on Lucifer and sacrifices herself to help Ryan.
This episode was an interesting change of pace. The snow globe may have been an antique but wasn’t one of the antiques and instead of Micki and Ryan stumbling into whatever terrible thing was happening, Lucifer instead came directly for them. If nothing else, this episode showed that the producers of Friday the 13th: The Series understood the danger of falling into a rut and that they were capable of changing things up without losing the overall macabre atmosphere of the show. The scenes in the castle were appropriately surreal and both Chris Wiggins and the often underused Robey gave good performances. Of the three souls, Guy Bannerman made the strongest impression just by playing his character as being totally and unashamedly evil.
At the same time, it was hard not to feel that this episode was a bit of a missed opportunity. While it was interesting to have Micki, Jack, and Ryan meet up with three spirits of people who they used to know, it’s hard not to feel that the episode would have worked better if the producers had reached into the past and brought back some of the show’s former guest stars. Not an episode passed in which Micki, Jack, or Ryan doesn’t lose someone that they cared about and it would have been fun to see some of those people come back. Imagine the emotional impact if John Stockwell or Catherine Disher or maybe one of Jack’s old war buddies had returned to life.
All in all, this was a good episode that could have been even better.
Due to the holidays, this is my final Friday the 13th review for 2024. These reviews will return on January 3rd!
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988. The show can be found on Hulu!
This week’s episode of St. Elsewhere featured Dr. Craig winning an award. Good for him!
Episode 1.5 “Samuels and the Kid”
(Dir by Thomas Carter, originally aired on November 30th, 1982)
This week’s episode of St. Elsewhere was kind of boring, It wasn’t a bad episode because the show was well-acted and even the boring subplots felt as is they were part of a bigger whole but, especially when compared to last week’s episode, Samuels and the Kid just wasn’t as compelling.
The Kid of the title is Robbie Durant (Jeremy Licht), a young patient who needs to have some minor surgery done on his ankle. Dr. Samuels take a really intense interest in the kid, bonding with him and even offering him tickets to a Patriots football game. At first, it seems like Samuels is just trying to be nice to a kid who is in a scary situation. (When I was growing up, I spent a few nights in the hospital because of my asthma and it always scared me to death.) But, at the end of the episode, it is revealed that Samuels had a son who was Robbie’s age who died in a freak accident. As for Robbie, the operation is a success but he still dies as the result of an embolism. It was sad but, at the same time, I knew Robbie was going to die as soon as he showed up in the hospital. I’ve seen enough medical shows to know.
Dr. Cavanero was at a bed-and-breakfast when she learned that one of her patients had gone into labor and was at her apartment alone. Cavenro had to beg people for change so that she could use a pay phone to call the patient’s neighbors so that she could talk them through delivering the baby. Seen today, the most interesting thing about this storyline is that it takes place at a time when people had to carry around quarters so that they could call each other in case of an emergency. (There is a very dusty old payphone a few blocks away from my house. I assume it doesn’t work and I don’t think it’s been touched by human hands since the 90s — and I’m certainly not going to touch it! — but it’s always interesting to see it sitting there like some haunted beacon of the past.)
Dr. Fiscus continued to have sex with Kathy Martin. Good for them but I really don’t know that I need to spend a good deal of time listening to Howie Mandel talk about his sex life.
Dr. Chandler (Denzel Washington) accused a nurse of being incompetent. Nurse Rosenthal (Christina Pickles) got mad at him for yelling at the nurse in the hospital hallway. Dr. Westphall mediated and agreed to move the nurse to another floor. Denzel Washington is always fun when he’s yelling at people.
There was one very funny scene. Dr. Craig won an award for surgeon of the year and gave an extremely long, pompous, and rather bitter acceptance speech. (The award was a plaster cast of his own hands.) William Daniels played the scene perfectly and I have a feeling that Dr. Craig is going to end up becoming my favorite character. As a bonus, Daniels’s wife, Bonnie Bartlett, appeared as Craig’s wife. By the middle of Craig’s speech, even she had stoppled listening and lit a cigarette.
As I said, this was a little bit of a boring episode. Still, I look forward to the future of the show!
Speaking of the future, this is my last St. Elsewhere review of 2024. My next review of this show will post on January 3rd!
As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on Twitter and Mastodon. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We tweet our way through it.
Tonight, at 10 pm et, #FridayNightFlix presents Canada’s Strange Brew!
If you want to join us this Friday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 10 pm et, and use the #FridayNightFlix hashtag! It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.
Strange Brew is available on Prime! See you there!
Enjoy!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Highway to Heaven, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee and several other services!
This week, Jonathan and Mark are in Hollywood …. again!
Episode 3.5 “That’s Our Dad”
(Dir by Victor French, originally aired on October 29th, 1986)
Two orphans, Sarah (Kelley Parker) and Joey (R.J. Williams), are upset because they’re about to be split up. A family wants to adopt Sarah but they don’t feel like bringing along her best friend, Joey. Joey and Sarah wish that they could live with Bill Cassidy (Ned Beatty), the star of America’s favorite sitcom, That’s My Dad!
Sarah and Joey run away from the orphanage and end up at the studio at the exact same time that Bill is holding auditions to find a new co-star for That’s My Dad. Sarah and Joey tell Bill about their tragic backgrounds and how they each lost their parents. Bill, thinking that the kids are doing audition pieces, is so impressed that he tells his producer that he wants the kids to be hired immediately. The kids think that this mean they’re being adopted! Yay!
Unfortunately, Bill is a bitter man who, in private, doesn’t behave like the perfect father that he plays on television. Adopt two kids? Why would Bill want to do that!? Fortunately, Jonathan and Mark just happen to be installing a new security system at Bill’s home. Jonathan helps Bill to see that, even though he’s bitter, he could still redeem himself by adopting two random children. The end result is an episode that pretty much epitome of Highway To Heaven, shamelessly sentimental but heartfelt enough to be effective.
This was not Ned Beatty’s first appearance on Highway to Heaven. During the first season, he played two roles in The Banker and the Bum. Beatty does a pretty good job in this episode, playing Bill Cassidy as someone who can be unpleasant but not so unpleasant that his later change of heart doesn’t feel credible. From the first minute we meet Bill, we know he’s going to turn out to be not such a bad guy, if just because that’s what always happens on Highway to Heaven. On this show, even the most unlikable of characters usually achieve some sort of redemption. The main theme is the no one is bad as they originally seem. That’s actually a pretty sweet message when you think about it.
Highway to Heaven did quite a few shows about show business. I’ve read that Michael Landon was something of a workaholic and, as a result, he later felt that he missed out on spending time with his children. Certainly, that would explain why almost every Hollywood episode of Highway to Heaven seems to feature an actor or director who needs to learn to make time for the people in their lives.
Speaking of making time for the people in your life, it’s the holidays. This is going to be my final Highway to Heaven review for 2024. These reviews will return on January 2nd!
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Malibu CA, which aired in Syndication in 1998 and 1999. The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!
This week, I continue I wonder why I ever started reviewing this show in the first place.
Episode 1.21 “Scott’s Secret Dream”
(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on April 18th, 1999)
This week’s episode of this terrible show revolves around the local television news. Everyone is looking for a job.
Traycee, for instance, gets a job as the weather girl and spends her time saying that she doesn’t want it to rain in Malibu so she’s decided that it will be sunny instead. The judgmental and humorless station intern is not amused by any of this. Anyone who has watched this show should have little trouble guessing that the intern is Stads.
(It’s kind of sad how, in just a few episodes, Stads went from being the fun, kooky lifeguard to being a hyperjudgmental killjoy.)
Jason is excited because the station is sponsoring a jingle contest. He wants to be a professional songwriter so maybe this could be his chance! Jason does manage to win the contest but he spends so much time working on the jingle that he keeps his brother, Scott, from getting so much-needed sleep.
Scott has a secret dream. He wants to be the station’s sports reporter. (How about finishing high school first, Scott?) Even Stads thinks that Scott would be a good sports reporter. Unfortunately, Scott shows up for his audition exhausted and blows his big chance. The station hires someone over the age of 17 to be the sports reporter.
Fortunately, for Scott, the newly hired sports reporter turns out to be a sexist pig and he’s fired after he follows Jason’s advice and hits on the station manager. (Why is anyone following Jason’s advice about anything?) So, Scott gets another chance to audition but this time, he drinks too much coffee and ends up jumping on the news desk and dancing.
(Because, y’know, that’s something you totally do if you drink a lot of coffee.)
Can Jason and Stads get Scott a third audition? Yes, they can but the way they do it is so stupid that I don’t even want to talk about it. The important thing is that Scott gets the weekend sports job and …. well, I guess he’ll just work as a busboy at the restaurant for the rest of the week.
(I’m starting to think this show isn’t very realistic.)
Meanwhile, Peter is upset because he’s single and he’s taking out his frustration on Murray. So, Murray sends Peter a note from a secret admirer and …. you know what? This is too stupid to talk about. Brandon Brooks, as always, deserves some credit for bringing a touch of genuine sweetness to Murray’s odd behavior but …. no, no, I’m not going to talk about it. This whole subplot was just too stupid. Brandon Brooks and Ed Blatchford were probably the closest thing this show had to genuinely talented actors but the show always wasted them in the dumbest B-plots.
When I first started reviewing this show, I disliked both Scott and Jason equally. As this season has progressed, Scott has grown on me a little because, unlike his brother, he’s not a total sociopath. Scott, at the very least, seems to want to be a good person. Jason, on the other hand, just seems like he’s destined to go to prison for cheating someone out of their life savings.
Thank God, it’s the holidays! This is my last Malibu, CA review for 2024. My reviews of this show will return on January 2nd. Until then, I’m free from the Collins brothers!
Even music videos get special director’s cuts nowadays.
Enjoy!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing Monsters, which aired in syndication from 1988 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on YouTube.
This week, Monsters tries to be funny and it actually succeeds for once!
Episode 3.2 “Murray’s Monster”
(Dir by Scott Alexander, originally aired on October 7th, 1990)
Murray’s Monster opens with Sherwin (Joe Flaherty) laying on a psychologist’s couch and talking about how much he hates his overbearing wife while Debbie (Teresa Gaznel) takes notes. Debbie suddenly tells Sherwin that they’re out of time because Sherwin has to see his next patient. Sherwin sits up on the couch and Debbie returns to the reception desk. It’s an obvious joke but one that is well-played by both Joe Flaherty and Teresa Ganzel. That’s another way of saying that it made me laugh, even though I saw it coming.
Sherwin’s new patient is Murray (Marvin Kaplan). Murray is nervous and apologetic. He even apologizes for coming to his appointment, offering to come back next week if it’s too much of a bother for Sherwin to see him that day. Murray explains that people have been kicking him around all of his life and he’s sick of it. Sherwin, after telling Murray that he’s less than a man, puts Murray under hypnosis. Sherwin tells Murray to be more assertive. Murray promptly turns into an angry ape-man (Colin Penman). Ape-Man Murray is angry and destructive but, once he calms down, he turns back into Murray.
Frightened at first, Sherwin soon realizes that he can use Murray to his advantage. He invites Murray to have dinner with his wife, Luann (Miriam Flynn). His plan is that Murray will get angry with Luann, turn into an ape, and kill her. Then Sherwin will be free to pursue Debbie. Sherwin’s plan works in that Murray does get frustrated and he does turn into the ape. But, instead of killing Luann, he instead picks her up and runs off with her.
The next day, Sherwin is shocked when Murray and Luann show up at his office. It turns out that, since Murray was sick of people always telling him what to do, Ape Murray decided to disobey Sherwin’s wishes and has instead fallen in love with Luann. When Sherwin gets upset and starts yelling, Murray turns into the ape again. Uh-oh!
(As Luann puts it, “You’re a bad psychologist, Sherwin, because you never listen to your patients!”)
I have to say that I usually cringe whenever Monsters tries to be deliberately funny but this episode actually made me laugh. Joe Flaherty and Marvin Kaplan both had great comedic timing and, even though I saw the final twist coming, the dialogue was still clever enough and the performances sharp enough to hold my interest. This was a good episode. Good for Murray. Good for Monsters!
With the the holidays approaching, this is my final review of Monsters for 2024. My Monsters reviews will return on January 1st, 2025!
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!
This week, Isaac has a problem! Oh no! Who will man the bar?
Episode 5.10 “Love, Honor and Obey/Gladys and Agnes/Radioactive Isaac”
(Dir by Robert Scheerer, originally aired on November 28th, 1981)
Oh no! Isaac’s radioactive!
Well, no, not in the way that you might be thinking. Before leaving on this week’s cruise, Isaac had some dental work done and his new fillings can pick up radio stations. The only real problem with that is that Isaac likes a passenger named Patty Phelps (Berlinda Tolbert) and Patty likes him, except for when his teeth start playing music. It leads Patty to suspect that Isaac is just pulling a big prank on her and she doesn’t have any patience for that nonsense. Especially when there’s another handsome single man on board (played by Darrow Igus) whose teeth do not pick up radio stations. Is Isaac willing to sacrifice his fillings for love?
Meanwhile, Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara play …. well, they might as well just be playing Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara. I’ve seen Jerry and Anne on a few of these shows and they always play the same two characters regardless of what their characters may be named. In this case, Jerry and Anne want to renew their wedding vows on the Love Boat. Captain Stubing is happy to oblige but Anne decides that she doesn’t want to vow to “obey’ her husband. Jerry and Anne get into a fight and it looks like the marriage might be over! However, things work out in the end. They renew their vows and then Anne starts bossing Jerry around. It was a pretty simple story but Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara were so likable together that it didnt matter. I was happy they stayed together.
Finally, Agnes (Audra Lindley) and Gladys (Marion Ross) are two sisters who are taking a cruise together. Agnes meets and falls for Henry Whitewood (Bernard Fox), who is a genuine English earl! Gladys doesn’t want to lose Agnes and tells Henry that Agnes doesn’t have much money. It turns out that Henry doesn’t have a lot of money either. But he’s willing to sell what little land he does have so that he can refurbish the manor and invite Agnes to be his wife. Awwww! And don’t worry about Gladys. She realizes that the most important thing is that her sister’s happy.
This cruise was a bit on the forgettable side. After last week’s two-hour extravaganza, this week’s episode was rather low-key and almost mild-mannered. It was pleasant without being particularly memorable. I think we’ve all had vacations like that!
Speaking of vacations, the holidays are approaching so this is going to be final Love Boat review of 2024. My reviews will resume on January 1st!