I Watched Perry Mason: The Case Of The Telltale Talk Show Host (1993, Dir. by Christian I. Nyby II)


 

At the end of this movie… PERRY KISSED DELLA!

On the lips!

I knew they were in love!  Obviously, Della (Barbara Hale) was also in love with Paul Drake, Sr. but with Paul gone and Paul Drake, Jr. doing his own thing, she and Perry (Raymond Burr) can finally be together.  It was about time, too.  Even though Perry comes across like he would be too work-obsessed to really be a good husband or even boyfriend, it has also been obvious that Perry and Della were in love ever since Perry Mason Returns.

As for the mystery itself, it’s a really simple one and I was able to guess who the killer was from the start.  I know that Raymond Burr was terminally ill when he shot this film (and it was the last time Perry Mason movie to ai during his life time) and maybe that’s why the plot isn’t as complicated as usual.  The guest cast is really good, though.  Regis Philbin plays the owner of a talk radio station who is murdered by one of his hosts.  Every host is a suspect and they’re all strange enough to be fun to watch.  Both Montel Williams and G. Gordon Liddy are in this thing!

Knowing this was the last of the films to air during Burr’s lifetime made watching The Case of the Telltale Talk Show Host feel a little sad.  As sick as he was, Raymond Burr still dominated the courtroom.  That was one reason why the kiss made me so happy.  Perry (and Burr) didn’t have much time left but he made sure we all knew how he felt about Della.

 

Guilty Pleasure No. 51: Rage and Honor (dir by Terence Winkless)


The 1992 film, Rage and Honor, tells the story of two people from different worlds, who come together to kick ass and save a declining American city.

Preston Michaels (Richard Norton) is a cop from Australia who has come to America as a part of an exchange program.  When he’s not working undercover, he’s supplementing his income by working as a bodyguard for what appears to be an 80s cover band.

Kris Fairfield (Cynthia Rothrock) is a teacher at the local high school who also moonlights as a karate instructor.  She’s haunted by the death of her parents and the subsequent disappearance of her brother.  She cares about her students, even though hardly any of them actually appear in the film.  In fact, the whole high school teacher thing never really matters much in the grand scheme of things.

Preston and Kris are teaming up to take down spacey drug lord Conrad Drago (Brian Thompson).  Conrad has a fierce mullet, a cocaine addiction, and a knowledge of all of the body’s pressure points.  His girlfriend is Rita (Terri Treas) and the only thing that could possibly prevent Drago and Rita from taking over the city is a tape that reveals Rita and a bunch of crooked cops killing someone.  Kris and Preston are trying to find the tape before Drago and Rita find it.  Somehow, it all eventually leads to a homeless stock broker named Baby (Stephen Davies) and a weird fight club that’s run by Hannah the Hun (Alex Datcher).

It’s an incredibly silly film, to be honest.  It’s the type of film where Preston gets shot once in the side and once in the leg and neither time does it slow him down.  (He does mention that his leg hurts at one point but he never starts to limp or anything like that.)  Kris, meanwhile, is given a tragic backstory that is explained to us in-between scenes of awkward comedic relief.  Hannah goes from being a calculating villainous to a heroic ally, without the film attempting any explanation as to why.  Meanwhile, despite Brian Thompson’s best efforts to be menacing, Conrad is written as being some sort of flakey, New Age drug dealer.  He’s about as intimidating as the biggest guy in a drum circle.  There’s really not much rage or honor to be found in Rage and Honor.

And yet, it was impossible for me to dislike the film.  Every time Cynthia Rothrock did a flying kick and sent some jerk flying, the film won me back.  Unfortunately, she didn’t really get to do as much fighting as she should have.  She had to share the screen with Brian Thompson and Richard Norton, who both received fight scenes of their own.  All three of them looked good fighting but Cynthia was the clear star.  What she lacked in actual acting ability, she made up for with pure enthusiasm.  Watching her, you realized that she was not only good at fighting but she enjoyed it as well.  For all the film’s flaws, Cynthia kicked everyone’s ass and that’s really all that mattered.  It was empowering and, even more importantly, it was a lot of fun to watch.

Go, Cynthia, go!

Previous Guilty Pleasures

  1. Half-Baked
  2. Save The Last Dance
  3. Every Rose Has Its Thorns
  4. The Jeremy Kyle Show
  5. Invasion USA
  6. The Golden Child
  7. Final Destination 2
  8. Paparazzi
  9. The Principal
  10. The Substitute
  11. Terror In The Family
  12. Pandorum
  13. Lambada
  14. Fear
  15. Cocktail
  16. Keep Off The Grass
  17. Girls, Girls, Girls
  18. Class
  19. Tart
  20. King Kong vs. Godzilla
  21. Hawk the Slayer
  22. Battle Beyond the Stars
  23. Meridian
  24. Walk of Shame
  25. From Justin To Kelly
  26. Project Greenlight
  27. Sex Decoy: Love Stings
  28. Swimfan
  29. On the Line
  30. Wolfen
  31. Hail Caesar!
  32. It’s So Cold In The D
  33. In the Mix
  34. Healed By Grace
  35. Valley of the Dolls
  36. The Legend of Billie Jean
  37. Death Wish
  38. Shipping Wars
  39. Ghost Whisperer
  40. Parking Wars
  41. The Dead Are After Me
  42. Harper’s Island
  43. The Resurrection of Gavin Stone
  44. Paranormal State
  45. Utopia
  46. Bar Rescue
  47. The Powers of Matthew Star
  48. Spiker
  49. Heavenly Bodies
  50. Maid in Manhattan