Category Archives: TV Review

Late Night Retro Television Review: Baywatch Nights 2.11 “Possessed”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch Nights, a detective show that ran in Syndication from 1995 to 1997.  The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

This week, Donna’s got a knife!

Episode 2.11 “Possessed”

(Dir by David W. Hagar, originally aired on February 2nd, 1997)

A notorious serial killer dies when a prison bus is struck by several cars.  His blood gets on several of the people present at the accident and, as a result, he starts possessing them person-by-person.  He inhabits a body, commits several murders, and, once his current body expires, he moves on to the next person.

For instance, lifeguard Donna DiMarco was on the scene of the accident and soon, she finds herself putting on sexy lingerie, grabbing a knife, and driving around in search of young hitchhikers to seduce and kill.  Oh no!  That’s not the Donna that we all know.  Fortunately, Mitch and Ryan realize what’s happening and Mitch is able to track Donna down before she kills her first hitchhiker.  The killer’s spirit flees Donna’s spirt and possesses its next victim.

Ray Reegun (Robert Ginty) is a cop who was one of the first people on the scene of the accident.  When he becomes possessed by the killer, he immediately heads down to Mitch’s office and kidnaps Ryan.  While Mitch tries to find them, Ray takes Ryan to an abandoned movie theater and tells her about all of the great movies that have premiered at the theater.

“Is this you or is this the killer?” Ryan asks.

It seems like a strange question to ask.  I mean, does it really matter?  Ray is possessed by a serial killer and is holding Ryan prisoner.  So, whether it’s Ray or the killer who is into the movies really doesn’t seem that important.  Bad people can like movies too, after all.  And Ray’s married so if he’s the one flirting with Ryan at the theater, that’s not a good thing.

Fear not, though.  Mitch is able to save both Ryan and Ray.  It’s left ambiguous as to whether or not the evil spirit has truly been defeated after it leaves Ray’s body.  The episode actually ends with Ryan and Mitch leaving to check on another person who was at the accident so who know?  We know that Mitch went back to being a lifeguard after the end of this season but we don’t know what happened to Ryan.  Maybe she’s still running around the country, trying to track down that spirit.

It’s an interesting idea.  I liked the idea of the spirit jumping from person-to-person and the idea of the spirit moving in the order of the people who arrived at the scene of the accident predates the Final Destination films.  The first half of the show, which featured Donna trying to kill that hitchhiker, was enjoyably absurd,  But the stuff with Ray and Ryan got bogged down with Ray giving that endless monologue in the theater.  Watching this, one gets the feeling that whoever wrote the episode lost intrest about halfway through.  Not even the presence of Robert Ginty can liven things up.

Oh well.  Next week — two Vikings come back to life and they’re mad!  Woo hoo!

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 5.10 “A Very Strange Affair/The Sailor”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites.  Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week’s episode is about angels and Flying Dutchmen.

Episode 5.10 “A Very Strange Affair/The Sailor”

(Dir by Cliff Bole, originally aired on January 2nd, 1982)

This episode begins not with Mr. Roarke meeting the plane but instead with him heading out alone to the beach, where he meets a ghost ship that is being steered by Captain Hendrik Van Horton.  Captain Van Horton is the legendry Flying Dutchman, the sailor who cursed God when he failed to defeat the Spanish fleet and who is now cursed to sail the ocean until he finds a woman who not only loves him but who is “willing to sacrifice her life” for him.  Every seven years, Captain Van Horton is allowed to spend two days on dry land and he almost always comes to Fantasy Island.

And yes, this all sounds very intriguing and it is an interesting way to open this episode.  I’m so used to the stock footage of Roarke driving down to the docks that it’s always a bit jarring to see something different.  However, Captain Van Horton is also played by the reliably stiff (if likable) Peter Graves.  Graves’s deadpan and straight-forward acting style made him the ideal actor for certain roles, usually as a professional of some sort.  However, Graves’s rather stoic persona did not make him the best choice to play a tortured sea captain, cursed to sail on the ocean for an eternity.

As for his fantasy, the captain is lucky enough to be on the Island at the same time as Laura Myles (Florence Henderson), whose fantasy is to fall in love with an old-fashioned man’s man.  She falls for the Captain, despite the attempts of her ex-boyfriend, Bill (Brett Halsey), to win her back.  Unfortunately, the Captain loses his temper and punches the well-meaning Bill.  Bill is willing to forgive the Captain but Mr. Roarke explains that the Island police are not as forgiving.  (Doesn’t Mr. Roarke control the police?  It’s his Island!)  Captain Van Horton needs to marry Laura and then leave.

Captain Van Horton explains that he’s fallen in love with Laura but he can’t ask her to die for him.  Laura says that she would be willing to die for a man who she has known for a day and half.  Roarke then reveals that Laura doesn’t have to die.  She just has to be “willing to die.”  (Wow, what a silly curse!)  The Captain and Laura sail off together but you have to wonder how the Captain feels about discovering, after hundreds of years of wandering, that there was an easily exploitable loophole to the curse.

As for the other fantasy, Ron (Dick Smothers) needs some confidence so he’ll be able to talk notorious tightwad, J.D. Stoneman (Hans Conried) i,nto investing in an orphanage.  Roarke rings a bell and summons an angel, Miss Harbringer (Shelley Smith).  Miss Harbringer gives Ron a pep talk and even goes to talk to Stoneman herself.  Of course, Miss Harbringer’s real purpose is to make Ron’s wife, Elaine (Arlene Golonka), so jealous that Elaine will take over and encourage Ron to talk Stoneman into giving him the money.

Anyway, Miss Harbringer flirts with Stoneman and convinces him to invest in a good cause.  But she allows Ron and Elaine to believe that it was Ron’s powers of persuasion that convinced Stoneman to invest.  It’s kind of sad that Ron and Elaine forget about Miss Harbringer as soon as they get their money but Roarke says that’s the way it is for angels.  I don’t think that’s true, though.  I bet George Bailey never forgot Clarence.

(Atta boy, Clarence!)

Tattoo is not in this episode so it’s Julie’s turn to assist Mr. Roarke.  What’s odd is that the episode doesn’t even offer up any explanation as to where Tattoo has disappeared.  This episode was a bit on the blah side so it definitely could have used Tattoo.  A random llama shows up at the end of the show and I liked that.  Llamas are cute.  But otherwise, this was a forgettable trip to the Island.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 2.13 “Down Time”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee!

This week, Ponch loses his car and Baker loses his wallet.

Episode 2.13 “Down Time”

(Dir by John Florea, aired on December 16th, 1978)

While chasing two female car thieves, Ponch crashes his motorcycle and sprains his finger.  Getraer is overjoyed because he can now require Ponch to take a few days off work.  Ponch is happy because he’s just moved into a new apartment and he wants to get to know his neighbor, Kim Balford (Randi Oakes).

Kim says she’s an aspiring actress but actually she’s the head of a ring of car thieves.  In fact, by an amazing coincidence, they’re the same car thieves that Ponch was chasing when he injured himself!  Kim sees that Ponch has a new car, a brown Firebird.  Ponch really loves that car.  Well, too bad!  Kim and her associates steal his car.

To Getraer’s disappointment, Ponch is soon spending his entire vacation at headquarters, pressuring people like Detective Bill Ross (Burr DeBenning) to find his car.  Detective Ross informs Ponch that he’ll probably never see his car again but Ponch is determined to get it back.

Baker, meanwhile, just want to find his wallet.  His misplaced it and he has no idea where it is.  Ponch is upset that Baker is more upset over losing all of his money and his ID than over Ponch losing his car.  Baker, realizing that this is CHiPs and Ponch therefore always comes first, apologizes to Ponch and agrees to set aside his own problems to help Ponch out.

Fortunately, Ponch and Baker do figure out that Kim is the one behind the car thefts.  It all leads to a chase through the streets of Los Angeles.  Kim and her two partners-in-crime are in one of those big trucks that are used to transports cars from one place to another.  (I can’t imagine driving one of those things.)  Since they’re off duty, Baker and Ponch have to make due with Baker’s pickup truck.  (Fortunately, Grossman shows up on a motorcycle so this episode doesn’t turn out like that weird season one episode where Baker and Ponch spent the entire episode in a patrol car.)  Kim is caught but, of course, Ponch’s beloved firebird is destroyed in the chase.

Good news, though!  Baker finds his wallet in his jacket.  Yay!  YOU GO, BAKER!

This episode was actually a lot of fun.  Watching it, you could just hear people in 1978 saying, “They steal cars? …. But, they’re women!”  Randi Oakes, who would later be a regular on the show as a member of the Highway Patrol, gives a wonderfully over-the-top performance as Kim.  As well, anyone watching should be able to relate to Getraer’s annoyance as he discovers that there’s no way get Ponch to stay home.  Best of all, with so much of the action taking place in Ponch’s swinging bachelor pad, this episode was pretty much a museum-quality exhibit of the late 70s.  Watching this episode was like stepping into a time machine.

It was fun!

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.23 “Sons and Lovers”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, the second season comes to a close with …. TRAGEDY!

Episode 2.23 “Sons and Lovers”

(Dir by John Nicolella, originally aired on May 9th, 1986)

The final episode of the second season Miami Vice opens with Crockett and Tubbs getting their cover blown for what seems like the 100th time.  Seriously, has there every been an episode featuring these two going undercover in which their cover has not been blown?  This time, they’re nearly executed by the drug dealers they were trying to arrest but, at the last minute, a sniper with a laser-guided sight shoots one of the dealers.  In the confusion, Sonny and Tubbs are able to subdue most of the other dealers and disarm a booby trap that would have blown up Switek and Zito.

When Crockett mentions that they would have been dead if not for the sniper with the laser pointer, Switek says, “None of our guys have a laser.”

(Why not, Switek!?  Are you guys trying to win the War on Drugs or not!?)

It turns out that the sniper worked for Angelina Medera (Phanie Napoli), the daughter of Calderone, the Colombian drug lord whose murder of Tubb’s brother led to Tubbs coming to Miami in the first place.  Though she is still bitter over Crockett killing her father, Angelina has come to Miami to introduce Tubbs to his son, infant Ricardo, and to warn Tubbs that her half-brother, Orlando (John Leguizamo, in his first screen role), has put a contact out on his life.

Tubbs is a father!  Tubbs is in love!  Well, as Crockett could warn him, there’s nothing worse than being happy when you’re a member of the Vice Squad because it’s guaranteed that your happiness will be ripped away from you in the most violent way possible.  Orlando comes to Miami and kidnaps Angelina and little Ricardo.  With the help of a corrupt DEA agent named Harrison (J.C. Quinn), Orlando tries to set Tubbs up.  Drawing Tubbs out to a pier where Angelina is bound in a car, Orlando plans to blow up his rival.  Tubbs, being the star of the show, does manage to survive being near the car when it explodes.  Angelina is not so lucky.  Tragically, Tubbs believes that his son was in the car as well.  (Actually, Orlando set little Ricardo back to Colombia.)  At Angelina’s funeral, Tubbs receives a letter from Orlando.  “I’ll be back!” it reads.

And so, season 2 ends!

The finale was a bit of a let down, largely because a good deal of the running time was devoted to flashbacks to remind us just who the Calerdones were in the first place.  As well, John Leguizamo is not exactly the most intimidating of actors and his performance as Orlando was a bit stiff and awkward.  (It makes sense when you consider that he was only 19 years old and making his debut on a hit television show.  Anyone would be nervous.)  Much like the Frank Zappa episode, it’s obvious that this episode was meant to launch a storyline that would be revisited in the future.  While Leguizamo would return, it would appear that this episode is the only one to feature Tubbs’s son.  So, I guess Tubbs will have to live the rest of his life thinking his childhood was blown up by a Colombian drug lord.

That’s dark!

That’s Miami Vice dark!

Despite the weak finale, I thought the second season of Miami Vice was a good one.  There were a few weak episodes but, for the most part, it was a strong and stylish season and one that continued to explore just why exactly the War on Drugs proved to be unwinnable.  Episodes like Out Where The Buses Don’t Run, Bushido, One Way Ticket, Little Miss Dangerous, and Trust Fund Pirates were all examples of Miami Vice at its cynical and surreal best.

Next week, we begin season 3 with a guest appearance by Liam Neeson!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi Junior High 3.9 “Food For Thought”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi Junior High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1987 to 1989!  The series can be streamed on YouTube!

This week, everyone’s thinking about food.

Episode 3.9 “Food For Thought”

(Dir by Eleanore Lindo and Kit Hood, originally aired on January 30th, 1989)

The science fair is coming up and the Farrell twins are doing their project on eating disorders.  One of them, I think it’s Heather, is convinced that everyone at Degrassi has an eating disorder.  She even speculates that Lucy has an eating disorder, even though Lucy explains that it’s a combination of exercise and her metabolism that allow her to remain thin.  “Some people are just thin,” the other twin says and that’s an important thing to remember.  Not every skinny girl has an eating disorder and assuming that they do can be very harmful to their self-image.

Alexa worries that she’s fat.  After she asks Simon if she’s fat, Simon stupidly says, “I don’t know.”  (Simon isn’t very smart.)  Alexa asks the Farrell twins if it’s possible to just be anorexic for a week.  To Alexa, that sounds like a much better way to lose weight than to exercise.

Meanwhile, the person who actually does have an eating disorder — Kathleen — is left to struggle alone.  Kathleen is the girl who always has to be the first to raise her hand with the answer in class.  She has to be the first to get involved with every school project  She always has to be the first to tell everyone else why they’re wrong.  Kathleen is a bossy perfectionist who insists that she doesn’t need anyone’s help.  As a result, Kathleen is not particularly popular.  Melanie is Kathleen’s only friend, largely because Melanie is one of the few people to understand that Kathleen’s home life sucks.  Her father is always working and her mother is an alcoholic.  Kathleen wants to win the science fair so her parents will be proud of her and maybe they’ll stop fighting for a few minutes.

Along with everything else, Kathleen is bulimic.  Despite already being thin, Kathleen is skipping meals and throwing up whatever she eats during the day.  She’s also taking laxatives.  (Ew!)  Melanie, sensing that something is wrong with Kathleen, takes a look at Kathleen’s diary while Kathleen is busy throwing up.  Melanie discovers that Kathleen is obsessed with losing ten pounds by the end of the week.

Needless to say, it all catches up with Kathleen.  After only receiving honorable mention in the science fair, Kathleen faints in the school hallway.  (It’s really not a show about an eating disorder until someone faints.)  What sets this episode apart from the typical episode about an eating disorder is that, even after she faints, Kathleen refuses to admit that she has a problem.  The episode ends with Kathleen refusing to listen as Melania tries to convince her that she needs to get help.  It’s a dark ending but it’s also a realistic one.  Problems are never as easily solved as television would have you believe.

This episode was an example of what Degrassi does so well.  Kathleen, a character who most shows would simply portray as being a one-dimensional bitch, is revealed to be suffering more than perhaps any of the other regular characters.  Instead of treating her like a joke or a stereotype, this episode invites us to consider why Kathleen acts the way that she does.  For all the well-intentioned students at Degrassi, the classmate who needs them the most is left to suffer in isolation.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Check It Out! 2.12 “High Tech”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Howard once again ruins Edna’s life.

Episode 2.12 “High Tech”

(Dir by Alan Erlich, originally aired on January 11th, 1987)

Howard has a gambling problem!

Wait a minute ….  I thought that was the plot of last week’s episode.

Well, it’s the plot of this week’s episode as well.  After Howard invests Edna’s life savings ($10,000, though it should be remembered that this is Canadian money) in a Venezuelan gold mine, Edna can only watch in horror as an earthquake rips through Venezuela and wipes out the gold mine.  (She should just be happy that she invested before Chavez and Maduro came to power.)  Howard, however, is sure that he can win her money back because he has a tip about a sure thing in an up-coming boxing match….

That’s it!  Edna demands that Howard go to therapy.

Which Howard does.  Dr. Cravitz (John Stocker) seems to be a little crazy himself, especially when people accidentally call him “Clavitz.”  The doctor does help Howard to realize that he has a gambling problem.  His mother used to take him to bingo halls while his father spent all of his time playing poker.  Howard is a bad gambler because he’s trying to both win his parent’s love and get back at them for neglecting him while he was growing up.  Damn, that’s depressing.

Howard returns to the store, diagnosed but hardly cured.  Fortunately, he gets a call from his stockbroker, telling him that the gold mine is now worth $10,000 because there’s oil underneath the gold.  Edna gets her money back, minus the money that Howard lost on the boxer.

This episode is another one where Howard is a complete and total buffoon.  I prefer the episodes where Howard is an idiot to the ones where he’s actually competent.  A competent manager is not a funny manager but a buffoonish boss who makes life difficult for the people working under him …. hey, who can’t relate to that?  That’s why The Office was better when Michael was boss than when Andy took over.  No one watches a show like this to root for management.

This episode had some funny moments.  There was an entertaining B-plot about Christian installing a new computerized checking system and accidentally ordering three-years worth of potatoes at one time.  (I had to smile when a jump cut revealed that every display in the store was now potato-related.)  Even better, Gordon Clapp finally returns as the dim-witted handyman, Viker.  Clapp’s ultra sincere line delivery made Viker into a hilarious character and the scenes where Viker gets on Howard’s nerves are always entertaining.  When we first see Viker, he’s upgrading his lunchbox.  Later, he tells Howard that “an important person called with an important message, that’s all I remember.”  This show works best when it embraces absurdity and Viker is so wonderfully absurd that you can’t help but love the character.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 9/15/24 — 9/21/24

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

I have spent most of this week getting ready for the annual October Horrorthon, which means that I’ve been watching a lot of horror movies and not a lot of television.  As a matter of fact, I haven’t watched one episode of Big Brother this year and I didn’t even realize that Survivor started last week.

(Most years, I blog about Big Brother for another site but, due to my father’s passing, I took a leave of absence of this year.  I may, however, write about Survivor because it’s only a once-a-week show as opposed to a 7-day a week gig.)

Here’s a few thoughts on what I did watch this week:

American Sports Story: Aaron Hernandez (FX)

I watched the first two episodes of the latest Ryan Murphy-produced true crime miniseries on Saturday.  This show deals with the life and crimes of Aaron Hernandez, a pro football player who ended up going to prison for murder and who is suspected of carrying out a lot more murders over the course of his short life.  The first two episodes followed Aaron in high school and college, struggling to live up to his father’s ambitions and also with his own sexuality.  The episodes were well-directed but I have to admit that the culture of sports remains extremely odd to me.  So far, the defining image of the series is a bunch of naked football players hugging on each other while loudly talking about how much they hated anything that they considered to be gay.

So far, Josh Andres Rivera is believable as Aaron, even if he doesn’t exactly have the most exciting screen presence.  Then again, Aaron Hernandez appears to have been kind of an idiot so maybe it makes sense that he would be kind of a blah person.  The best performance so far has come from Tony Yazbeck as Aaron’s college coach.

The Emmy Awards (ABC)

Jeff and I watched the ceremony on Sunday but we muted it fairly early on.  From what I saw, it was a pretty boring ceremony, up until Hacks beat The Bear for Best Comedy.  I’m not really a huge fan of Hacks but it’s definitely more of a comedy than The Bear.  That said, and this may be my film snobbery coming through, The Emmys have always felt a bit pointless when compared to the Oscars.  Maybe that’s the Oscars have different nominees every year whereas the Emmys will nominate Only Murders In The Building until it finally ends its run.

Get Judged By Byron Browne (Nosey)

I watched an episode on Friday, in between horror movies.  A guy called in, upset because his father sold his childhood home.  (The guy had been led to believe, by his grandmother, that the house belonged to him.)  Byron basically told the guy that promises from grandma have no legal standing.  Poor guy.  I felt bad for him.  GIVE THE MAN HIS HOUSE!

The Jerry Springer Show (Nosey)

The episode I watched on Monday featured Jerry interviewing the Ku Klux Klan and the Black Hebrew Israelites (which, despite the name, is a Black supremacist group) at the same time.  Needless to say, none of them were happy about being on stage together and the whole thing devolved into a bunch of shouting.  One white woman in the audience shouted that black men received the right to vote before white women.  A black woman then said that the Bible says that women are not supposed to vote because men were created first.  It was a strange episode.

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

Read this week’s review here!

Miami Vice (Prime)

Read this week’s review here!

Monsters (YouTube)

I binged and wrote reviews of several episodes of Monsters.  Read this week’s review here!

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

This Friday, I watched an old episode of this 90s music show.  It was all about guitar rock and it was pretty cool.  Of course, the whole thing was pretty much just videos of Eric Clapton, Stevie Ray Vaughn, and Jeff Beck but they all sounded good.  This EDM girl enjoyed listening to them.

One Step Beyond (YouTube)

I watched a few episodes of this paranormal anthology show on Thursday as I prepared for this year’s Horrorthon.

Retro Television Review: Welcome Back, Kotter 3.27 “Class Encounters of the Carvelli Kind”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC  from 1975 to 1979.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, the third season comes to an end.

Episode 3.27 “Class Encounters of the Carvelli Kind”

(Dir by Robert Hegyes, originally aired on May 18th, 1978)

At the Kotter apartment, Gabe tells Julie a joke about his Uncle Bruce, the dressmaker.  Julie responds by slamming the bedroom door in his face.  Poor Gabe!  Julie, if you hate his jokes that much, just get a divorce!

The next morning, Gabe steps into his classroom and finds Mr. Woodman sitting at the window and watching the rain falling outside.  “Being alive is overrated,” Woodman says.  “Try telling that to a dead person,” Gabe replies.  Woodman reveals that, when he was young, he dreamed of being a podiatrist.  “I love feet but I hate socks …. Sock stood between me and happiness!”

Woodman has every reason to be depressed.  There’s some sort of weird student exchange program going on.  Epstein is spending the week at another high school.  (In real life, Robert Hegyes was not available to play Epstein because he was busy directing this episode.)  Meanwhile, Carvelli (Charles Fleischer) and his buddy Murray (Bob Harcum) are going to Buchanan.

When Carvelli and Murray tell a story about being abducted by aliens and taken to the planet Yorksl, Gabe takes them to the vice principal’s office so Woodman can straighten them out.  To Gabe’s surprise, Woodman not only believe Carvelli’s story but he decides that he wants to go live on another planet.  He gives Carvelli permission to invite the aliens to land in the school’s courtyard.  Gabe is even more shocked with the alien does show up and it turns out to be Julie!  Julie explains that she’s a Yorsklite and then she agrees to Woodman away with her.  “You look like a nice little fella….”

Wow, I guess the show’s over.  I mean, Woodman is gone.  Julie’s an alien.  How do you do another episode about homework after that….

Oh wait, it was all a daydream.

Okay, never mind!

Usually, I hate it when a show does the whole “It was all a dream” thing but I actually enjoyed this episode because it gave John Sylvester White a chance to be totally unhinged as Woodman.  White’s performance as Woodman has been one of the few things to remain consistently strong through the first three seasons of Welcome Back, Kotter.  Watching him lose his mind, piece-by-piece, has truly been entertaining.

The episode and the third season ends with Washington tells Mr. Kott-air a joke about how ugly his aunt is.  Gabe is impressed enough to write the joke down on a notepad.

And that’s it for Season 3!  This was definitely an uneven season, with the humor ultimately getting a bit too broad for its own good.  The Sweathogs themselves are all obviously adults now.  This was something that Gabe Kaplan himself noticed.  He reportedly suggested setting the next season at a community college and having Gabe get a job as a professor.  (His students would, of course, be the graduated Sweathogs.)  ABC disagreed, which resulted in Gabe not appearing in several season 4 episodes.  Meanwhile, John Travolta also only appeared in a handful of episodes as he was now busy being a movie star.

What would all that mean for Season 4?

We’ll start finding out next week!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 2.10 “Night Hunger”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!

This week, we’ve got the saddest episode of Friday the 13th yet!

Episode 2.10 “Night Hunger”

(Dir by Martin Lavut, originally aired on January 9th, 1989)

As a young boy, Michael Firono was constantly told by his father, Dominic (Nick Nichols), that he should always play to win and that, if he lost, it was because he was a wimp.  Needless to say, once Mike became a teenager, he did not have a great relationship with his father.  Seeking an escape from his abusive household, Mike spend all of his time at the local antique store where, on his 16th birthday, the store’s owner, Lewis Vendredi (R.G. Armstrong), gave him a special silver chain.

Mike (played by Richard Panebianco) has grown up to be an angry young man.  He always wears the chain around his neck.  Hanging on the chain is the key to his car.  Mike loves to race his car and, far from being the loser that his father claimed he would grow up to be, Mike cannot be beat.  His car is amazingly fast and Mike is incredibly (one might even say supernaturally) skilled behind the wheel.  His main goal is to defeat his childhood rival, Deacon (Real Andrews), who is now a street racer himself.  Deacon is hesitant to race Mike, precisely because Mike seems to be so driven to win that racing with him can be even more dangerous than usual.  To Deacon, street racing is fun.  For Mike, it’s an obsession.

Of course, Mike has a secret.  As long as he’s wearing the silver chain, he can’t be defeated.  But he has to kill people and dip the key in their blood for the chain to work.  Jack, Micki, and Ryan set out to reclaim the silver chain but an accident results in both the chain and the key being absorbed into Mike’s body.  With the chain and the key now sitting next to Mike’s heart, Mike’s eyes not only glow red but his car seems to have a mind of its own….

This is another one of those episodes of Friday the 13th where the villain is himself a victim.  Even before he met Lewis and received the silver chain, Mike was doomed.  His abusive father left Mike feeling so insecure and so obsessed with winning that there was really no way Mike wasn’t going to end up snapping eventually.  In the present day, Dominic finally understands how much he hurt Mike and he feels guilty about it but it’s too late to undo the damage that’s been done.  Like a pusher befriending people most likely to get addicted to his product, Uncle Lewis saw Mike as someone who would easily succumb to a cursed antique.  Mike becomes addicted to using the key and that leads to him doing a lot of bad things.  But the real curse here is not the silver chain but instead Mike’s abusive childhood.  Mike never had a chance.

This is a genuinely sad and well-acted episode, with Mike’s obsession eventually destroying him.  As happen so often with this show, Ryan and Micki are left with the knowledge that, while they can reclaim the cursed objects, they can never repair the damage that they’ve done.

Retro Television Review: T and T 3.15 “The Butler Duet”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990.  The show can be found on Tubi!

This week …. oh my God, it’s a surprisingly good episode of T and T!

Episode 3.15 “The Butler Duet”

(Dir by Don McCutcheon, originally aired on April 14th, 1990)

Sometimes, one screenshot tells you everything that you need to know about an episode.

In this episode, T.S. is indeed hired to bodyguard a parrot.  The parrot, named Higgins, has been named the sole beneficiary of Mrs. Wells’s will.  Mrs. Wells’s children (one of whom is played by comedian Colin Mochrie) want to declare their mother incompetent.  While Terri does her best to defend Mrs. Wells in court, T.S. works with Mrs. Wells’s butler (Ian White) to protect the parrot.

How does T.S. protect the parrot?  By putting on a tuxedo and working as the Butler’s assistant.  “Dinner is served,” T.S. Turner growls at one point.  Of course, to the surprise of no one, it turns out that the Butler is really the one whom is behind the effort to make Mrs. Wells look mentally incompetent.  “It’s always the butler,” Turner growls after grabbing the Butler in the courtroom.  Turner, it should be noted, does a lot of growling in this episode and I was happy about that.  What’s the point of casting Mr. T if he’s not going to growl at anyone?

With the Butler exposed, Mrs. Wells is ruled to be mentally competent and I guess that means that Higgins is going to be one rich bird.  Good for Higgins.  I like parrots.  I could never own one, of course, not with my love cats and my dislike of hearing my own words repeated back at me.  But still, they’re good for television shows and movies.  I think it’s a shame that Higgins didn’t have more of a Canadian accent but whatever.  You can’t have everything, I guess.

(How do parrots learn to talk?  And how difficult would it be for me to teach a parrot to like give an hour long speech or something?  I think next year’s state of the union address should be delivered by a parrot.  I mean, if a parrot were president, there would be no war.  There would be no government and things could go bad really quickly.  It would probably work better as a TV show than a real-life thing.)

This was an incredibly silly episode but it was also oddly likable.  For one thing, the judge in the courtroom was fascinated by the parrot and it was hard not to smile at him trying to get the parrot to talk while the witnesses testified.  As well, the episode was smart enough to realize that there’s no way that Mr. T cannot be amusing while wearing a tuxedo.

By T and T season 3 standards, this was a surprisingly good episode.