October Positivity: Revelation Road 3: The Black Rider (dir by Gabriel Sabloff)


Eric Roberts is not in Revelation Road 3.

I was hoping that he might be, even though his name didn’t appear in the credits.  Quite a few cast members from the first two films return for the third film.  David A.R. White is back as Josh McManus, the former super soldier who now drives his souped-car through the wastelands of America.  Bruce Marchiano is back, credited as the Stranger though we all  know he’s actually Jesus.  (Since Marchiano  appeared in all three films, I can only assume the Revelation Road films all take place in the same cinematic universe as The Encounter films and Sarah’s Choice.)  Brian Bosworth shows up briefly.

But there is no Eric Roberts.  Not even Eliza Roberts appears in this film!  It’s a shame and they are both missed.

However, Kevin Sorbo does show up.

Kevin Sorbo plays Honcho, a bandit leader who lives in the wastelands and who is worshipped by those who follow him.  Honcho occasionally speaks with an Australian accent.  Occasionally, the accent slips or disappears all together.  At first, I thought this was a case of bad editing, bad dubbing, or maybe Sorbo not really being that into the character.  However, there’s actually a rather clever moment in which Honcho tells Josh that he’s not actually from Australia.  He just speaks with the accent because it impresses his followers.  Without the accent, he’s just some guy who used to work at a gas station.  With the accent, he’s a warlord.

It’s a moment that made me laugh, largely because it’s true.  People love and fear accents.  If you’ve got a posh British accent, most Americans will assume that you’re planning a heist of some sort and that Sylvester Stallone or Harrison Ford is somewhere nearby, trying to stop you.  If you’ve got an Australian accent, the assumption amongst Americans is that you can survive harsh conditions, handle your alcohol, and jump out of a plane without a second thought.

However, Sorbo’s fake Australian accent also pays a sort of homage to the Mad Max films.  The Revelation Road trilogy was obviously envisioned as being a faith-based version of the Mad Max films, with David A.R. White cheerfully stepping into the somber shoes of Mel Gibson and Tom Hardy.  Using Mad Max as a model for a faith-based apocalypse film actually isn’t that bad of an idea.  Indeed, Gibson’s style of beatific madness opens up the original Mad Max trilogy to a similar interpretation.  Unfortunately, Revelation Road 3 is at time a bit too faithful to the Mad Max films, to the extent that it struggles to establish an identity outside of the films that inspired it.  That’s one reason why Kevin Sorbo’s character stands out.  He’s a character who genuinely surprises us.

As for the plot of Revelation Road 3, it finds Josh being sent on a mission to find The Shepherd (Robert Gossett), a mysterious figure who is gathering together a religious flock in the desert despite the fact that the new world government has outlawed things like religion and individual freedom.  While Josh’s wounded companion waits in a town ruled over by Mayor Drake (James Denton), Josh searches the desert and occasionally sees a mysterious rider on a horse.  The film mixes action and theology and the results are definitely mixed, with a few well-done chase scenes mixed with a lot of scenes of people talking.  That said, at its best, The Black Rider achieves a sort of desolate grandeur.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 3.4 “Blood For Blood”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, the bike patrol is busy!

Episode 3.4 “Blood For Blood”

(Dir by Gary Winter, originally aired on August 24th, 1997)

Last week, Pacific Blue attempted to deal with Rave Culture.

This week, it’s Hip Hop Culture!

Rapper Gangster 47 (Ross Leon) is gunned down while leaving a concert.  Gangster 47’s daughter (Meagan Good) is convinced that the hit was ordered by Gangster 47’s rival, Trigger Dog (Ten’l Brunson).  Now, I will just admit right now that I’m having a hard time writing this review because I can’t type out the name Trigger Dog without laughing.  Even though everyone says that Trigger Dog’s feud with Gangster 47 was all for show, Gangster 47’s daughter is determined to shoot Trigger Dog.

Fortunately, noted gangsta rap fan Chris Kelly is on the case.  Seriously, Chris is portrayed as being a fan of Gangster 47.  Over the course of the previous 38 episodes, we have seen absolutely nothing about the very white and the very uptight Chris that would lead us to believe that Chris would be a fan of anything other than military marches but this episode opens with her rolling her eyes when TC says that rap isn’t real music.  Chris tells TC that he needs to realize there’s more to music than the Bee Gees.  Ouch!  You tell him, Chris.  And seriously, take that, Bee Gees!  How Deep Is You Love now, huh!?

Chris and TC have been assigned to protect Gangster 47.  Why exactly the bike patrol is protecting a celebrity who has been getting death threats — as opposed to real cops and real bodyguards — is never really addressed.  Gangster 47’s daughter hates cops.  When Gangster 47 is gunned down in a drive-by, it seems like his daughter has a point. Gangster 47 isn’t killed but he is in the hospital.

The show’s producers obviously figured out that it would be a little bit awkward for the show’s almost entirely white cast to be dealing with a case involving two gangsta rappers so we meet a supercool black detective named — I’m not making this up — Wishbone (Derek Morgan).  Wishbone mainly exists to clasp hands with TC and to back-up Chris, as if the show is saying, “See?  These two aren’t as dorky as they seem.  Wishbone likes them!”  With Wishbone’s help, they come to realize that Gangster 47 was shot by a white man and Trigger Dog is innocent.

The white man is a serial killer named Strob (Todd Cattrell) who is apparently trying to bring about the Biblical apocalypse by murdering celebrities or something.  TC spots him on the beach but, in order to chase after him, he has to get on his bike and this leads to urgent close-up of TC dialing the combination of his bike lock.  Hey, TC, if you had a car, you would have already arrested Streob by now!

While this is going on, Victor’s girlfriend, Linda (Vaitiare Hirshon) has witnessed a murder and, if she testifies, she may have to go into the witness protecting program!  That’s a big deal but, of course, Palermo acts as if it’s nothing because Palermo never seems to get that people actually have lives outside of whatever he needs at any given moment.  Victor doesn’t want to lose Linda.  Conveniently, the murderer pulls a gun on Victor, which gives Victor the perfect excuse to gun him down.  Palermo’s like, “Did he shoot first?” and Victor says, “Sure.”  Victor then asks Linda to marry him.

Personally, I just find it interesting that, with all the crime happening in Santa Wherever This Show Takes Place, it just takes five people on bicycles to catch all the bad guys.  I mean, if that works in Santa Monica, maybe it’ll also work in New York after Mamdani is elected.  Let’s hope so!

One Battle After Another Leads The Gotham Nominations


For better or worse, Awards Season started today with the announcement of the Gotham nominations.  The Gothams are supposed to honor independent films, though the line between studio and independent is now so thin that it’s sometimes difficult to tell which is which.

In the past, the Gothams honored obscure films and also low-budget films that captured the public’s imagination.  This year, they gave the majority of their nominations to One Battle After Another, a big-budget film that starred a slew of Hollywood heavyweights.  Meanwhile, Sinners, a genuinely independent feature, received one nomination.

It’s debatable how much of a precursor the Gothams are.  They’re a critic-selected award and it’s always the guild awards that serve as the best precursors.  Still, it always helps to be mentioned somewhere.

Here are the 2025 Gotham nominations!

Best Feature
Bugonia
East of Wall
Hamnet
If I Had Legs I’d Kick You
Lurker
One Battle After Another
Sorry, Baby
The Testament of Ann Lee
Train Dreams

Best Director
Mary Bronstein – If I Had Legs I’d Kick You
Jafar Panahi – It Was Just an Accident
Kelly Reichardt – The Mastermind
Paul Thomas Anderson – One Battle After Another
Oliver Laxe – Sirât

Outstanding Lead Performance
Jessie Buckley – Hamnet
Lee Byung-hun – No Other Choice
Rose Byrne – If I Had Legs I’d Kick You
Sopé Dìrísù – My Father’s Shadow
Ethan Hawke – Blue Moon
Jennifer Lawrence – Die My Love
Wagner Moura – The Secret Agent
Josh O’Connor – The Mastermind
Amanda Seyfried – The Testament of Ann Lee
Tessa Thompson – Hedda

Outstanding Supporting Performance
Benicio Del Toro – One Battle After Another
Jacob Elordi – Frankenstein
Inga Ibsdotter Lilleaas – Sentimental Value
Indya Moore – Father Mother Sister Brother
Wunmi Mosaku – Sinners
Adam Sandler – Jay Kelly
Andrew Scott – Blue Moon
Alexander Skarsgård – Pillion
Stellan Skarsgård – Sentimental Value
Teyana Taylor – One Battle After Another

Best Original Screenplay
If I Had Legs I’d Kick You
It Was Just an Accident
The Secret Agent
Sorry, Baby
Sound of Falling

Best Adapted Screenplay
No Other Choice
One Battle After Another
Pillion
Preparation for the Next Life
Train Dreams

Best International Feature
It Was Just an Accident
No Other Choice
Nouvelle Vague
Resurrection
Sound of Falling

Best Documentary Feature
2000 Meters to Andriivka
BLKNWS: Terms & Conditions
My Undesirable Friends: Part I – Last Air in Moscow
The Perfect Neighbor
Put Your Soul on Your Hand and Walk

Breakthrough Director
Constance Tsang – Blue Sun Palace
Carson Lund – Eephus
Sarah Friedland – Familiar Touch
Akinola Davies Jr. – My Father’s Shadow
Harris Dickinson – Urchin

Breakthrough Performer
A$AP Rocky – Highest 2 Lowest
Sebiye Behtiyar – Preparation for the Next Life
Chase Infiniti – One Battle After Another
Abou Sangaré – Souleymane’s Story
Tonatiuh – Kiss of the Spider Woman

Horror on TV: Gargoyles (dir by Bill Norton)


For today’s horror on television, we have a made-for-TV monster movie from 1972, Gargoyles!

What happens when a somewhat condescending anthropologist (Cornel Wilde) and his daughter (Jennifer Salt) head out to the desert?  Well, they stop by a crazy old man’s shack so that they can look at his genuine monster skeleton.  Before Wilde can thoroughly debunk the old man’s claims, the shack is attacked by real monsters!

That’s right!  Gargoyles exist and they apparently live in Arizona!  There’s nothing particularly surprising about the plot but the gargoyles are memorable creations and Bernie Casey gives a good performance as their leader.  The gargoyle makeup was designed by none other than Stan Winston, who won an Emmy for his work here and who went on to win Oscars for his work on Aliens, Terminator 2, and Jurassic Park.

As well, a very young Scott Glenn shows up in the cast.  I like to think that he’s playing the same character in both Gargoyles and Sucker Punch.

Enjoy!

Bonus Horror On The Lens: I Was A Teenage Werewolf (dir by Gene Fowler, Jr.)


1957’s I Was A Teenage Werewolf combines two genres that were very popular in the late 50s.

On the one hand, it’s a film about a teenage rebel.  Tony Rivers (Michael Landon) is a teenager that means well but he keeps losing his temper.  If he can’t learn to control his anger, he could very well be looking at a life behind bars.

On the other hand, it’s also a horror film.  When Tony visits a hypnotist (Whit Bissell), the end result is Tony turning into a werewolf and going on a rampage, all while still wearing his letterman jacket.

All in all, this is a pretty fun little movie.  You can check out my review of it by clicking here.

And you can watch the movie below!

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 7.16 “Baby On Demand/The Last Dogfight”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  The show is once again on Tubi!

This week, on Fantasy Island, it’s more of the same old same old.

Episode 7.16 “Baby on Demand/The Last Dogfight”

(Dir by Jerome Courtland, originally aired on March 10th, 1984)

Former “pop singer” Joanna Jones (Tanya Tucker) comes to Fantasy Island.  She is no longer concerned with her musical artistry.  (“If you can call that art,” Lawrence says — Lawrence, you bitch, you!)  Now, she wants to have a baby but she doesn’t want to get married.  Her fantasy is to get pregnant over the weekend and never have to see the guy again.

Okay, then.  I mean, does she really have to go to Fantasy Island to have a one night stand?  She’s a famous and wealthy woman so it just seems odd that apparently, this is something that only Mr. Roarke can make happen.

Mr. Roarke sets her up with Harley Batten (Dean Butler) but Joanna finds herself falling for Harley so she abandons him and instead hooks up with George, who is played by Mark Venturini.  Venturini later played Vic in Friday the 13th Part V.  Remember the guy with the axe who gets tired of Joey bothering him while he’s chopping wood?  That was Mark Venturini!

By the end of the episode, Joanna has decided to take a chance on love and she leaves the Island with Harley.  This fantasy just felt odd, largely because Tanya Tucker was a terrible actress and everyone on the show seemed to be embarrassed for her whenever she had to deliver her lines.  I’m pretty sure that I saw both Dean Butler and Mark Venturini looking for an exit whenever Tucker started speaking.

As for the other story, it’s yet another aviation story.  World War II flying aces Paul Spencer (Leigh McCloskey) and Hunter Richter (Grant Goodeve) are turned back into young men so that they can fly their airplanes over Fantasy Island and simulate a dogfight.  However, Richter is haunted by the death of his wife at Dresden and, after discovering that Spencer’s wife (Leah Ayres) bears a strong resemblance to his late wife, Richter becomes determined to engage in actual combat. In the end, Spencer refuses to fight and Richter’s code of honor prevents him from shooting down a man who will not fire back. Because, of course, World War II-era Germans were famous for their sense of fair play….

The aviation story was, at least, well-acted.  But it still felt very familiar.  It was obvious that the show’s writers had run out of ideas.  All in all, this was another disappointing Season 7 trip to the Island.

Scenes That I Love: The Opening of Suspiria!


The opening of Dario Argento’s 1977 masterpiece, Suspiria, is about as perfect an opening as one could hope for.  American ballet student Suzy Banyon (Jessica Harper) arrives in Frieburg, Germany.  Both Argento and Harper perfectly portray Suzy’s confusion as she makes her way through the airport and, as torrential rain drenches her, attempts to hail a taxi and get a ride to the dance academy.  (What Suzy doesn’t know, of course, is that the dance academy is home to the ancient witch known as Our Mother of Sighs.)  With this opening scene, Argento both immediately establishes the off-center, nightmarish atmosphere of Suspiria and establishes Suzy as a character who we, as the audience, relate to and care about.  Suspiria is a great film and certainly one that didn’t need a pretentious remake.  The greatness of the original Suspiria all begins with this brilliant opening.

Horror Song of The Day: Main Theme From Suspiria by Goblin


Suspiria (1977, dir by Dario Argento, DP: Luciano Tovoli)

You knew this was coming!

Today’s horror song of the day is the classic main theme to Dario Argento’s Suspiria!  (The Argento version is the only version that matters.)  The iconic soundtrack was composed by Goblin.  I saw an interview with Claudio Simonetti in which he said he wanted the song to be “almost annoying” in its intensity.  While I could never be annoyed this song, I do understand Simonetti’s point.  The score is designed to be as overwhelming as the evil at the center of the film.

All together now: “WITCH!”

4 Shots From 4 Horror Films: 2000s Part Two


This October, I’m going to be doing something a little bit different with my contribution to 4 Shots From 4 Films.  I’m going to be taking a little chronological tour of the history of horror cinema, moving from decade to decade.

Today, we complete to the aughts!

4 Shots From 4 Horror Films

Halloween (2007, dir by Rob Zombie)

Halloween (2007, dir by Rob Zombie)

Paranormal Activity (2007, dir by Oren Peli)

Paranormal Activity (2007, dir by Oren Peli)

Cloverfield (2008, dir by Matt Reeves)

Cloverfield (2008, dir by Matt Reeves)

The House of the Devil (2009, dir by Ti West)

The House of the Devil (2009, dir by Ti West)

October True Crime: Stolen Innocence (dir by Bill L. Norton)


1995’s Stolen Innocence opens with 18 year-old Stacy Sapp (Tracey Gold) trying to sneak back into her house after a long night of drinking and partying.  Unfortunately for her, Stacey isn’t very good at sneaking around and she’s caught by her mother (Bess Armstrong) and her father (Nick Searcy).

“I’m 18!” Stacy argues.

“You’re going to end up pregnant!” her mother yells.

Stacy says that that her mother is just scared that she’s going to end up a loser “like you!”  Well …. yeah, Stacy, that’s kind of the point.  If your mother has experience with the life decisions necessary to become a loser, maybe you should listen to her warnings.

Anyway, Stacy runs away with a friend of her’s.  After her friend decides to go back home, Stacy hitches a ride with a trucker.  When the trucker stops off at a truck stop so he can get his brakes looked at, Stacy meets Richard Brown (Thomas Calabro, wearing a really bad wig).  Richard is long-haired and has got a tough guy beard and a cheesy tattoo of a heart on his scrawny forearm.  Stacy, of course, is totally smitten and she goes off with Richard and his “friend,” Eddie (Matt Letscher).

It doesn’t take long for us to figure out what Richard is bad news.  He carries a gun.  He’s financing his trip through stolen checks.  He might not even own the truck that he’s driving.  He and Eddie have a bizarre relationship in which Richard continually abuses Eddie but Eddie refuses to leave.  Richard is obviously a bad guy and we can all see it.  When Stacy finally calls her parents from the road, they immediately figure out that Stacy is in trouble.  However, it takes Stacy forever to figure it out because Stacy’s kind of an idiot.

I cringed a lot while watching Stolen Innocence, not so much because of the film’s depiction of Richard’s criminal lifestyle but because I used to have a definite weakness for bad boys and I could kind of understand what was going through Stacy’s mind when she first met Richard.  That said, I’m pretty sure that I would have figured things out a lot quicker than Stacy did.  Stacy quickly goes from being a somewhat sympathetic rebellious teenager to being someone who you really start to get annoyed with.  Oh, he’s threatening you with a gun?  Okay, that’s when you leave!  That’s when you start plotting your escape.  You don’t make excuses for him.  He’s financing his trip with stolen checks?  I’m sorry, is that not a red flag?  Add to that, as played by a miscast Thomas Calabro, it’s not like Richard is some boiling cauldron of charisma.  From the first minute we see him, with his long hair and his cowboy hat and his tattoo, the guy seems like a joke.

Eventually, Stacy does figure out the truth but, by that point, Richard and her are holed up in a motel room and Richard is exchanging gunfire with the FBI.  The film ends with a title card, reminding us that this was a true story.  “He’s not a bad person!” Stacy wails to the police.  I guess some people really are that stupid.