Daily Archives: June 16, 2025

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 3.23 “Nightengale”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, someone is performing emergency surgery on the street!

Episode 3.23 “Nightengale”

(Dir by Don Weis, originally aired on March 23rd, 1980)

Something strange is happening in Los Angeles.  Every time there’s a serious accident, a middle-aged woman (Louise Latham) appears and provides medical help to the injured.  At the start of the episode, she even performs an emergency tracheotomy on the side of the freeway.  Whenever the highway patrol officer on the scene asks her for her name, she avoids the question.  And, whenever an ambulance shows up, she always manages to slip away.  As Jon and Ponch discover, the woman is named Lucy Kenton and, even though she’s a medical expert, she’s not a doctor.  With the help of the always-understanding Sgt. Getraer, Jon and Ponch help her to get her medical license so that she can legally perform surgery on the street.  Good for them!

This was a bit of an odd episode.  It seemed strange that the woman somehow always seemed to be around whenever there was an accident.  A car would crash and suddenly, Lucy would come running up, almost as if she had been patiently waiting.  The show acted as if it was just a coincidence but what are the chances that the same woman would be present at the sites of multiple accidents over the course of just a few days?  And what are the chances that Ponch would just happen to be the responding officer at two of those accidents?

To be honest, that’s one of the things that always struck me as being strange about CHiPs.  Somehow, the same people keep running into Ponch and Jon over and over again.  I mean, Los Angeles is a big city and it’s home to a lot of people.  But if you run into Ponch and Jon once, it seems you’re destined to keep seeing them for at least a week.  Once they get that first speeding ticket or stern warning, people literally can’t step outside of their house without Ponch and Jon just happening to be somewhere nearby.  That’s the sort of thing that would make me paranoid.

The B-plot of this episode featured a teenage couple whose van kept breaking down whenever they tried to run away from home.  There wasn’t much to this story but it did feature “special guest star” Dana Plato as the younger sister of the female half of the couple.  Plato delivered all her lines as if she was auditioning for a school play.  Oddly enough, Dana Plato appeared at the start of this season as herself.  She was one of the many celebrities to show up for the roller disco episode.

There really wasn’t much to this episode.  It wasn’t terrible but it did feel somewhat insubstantial.  We’re coming up on the end of the season and, from the last few episodes, I get the feeling the show’s writers just wanted to wrap things up and start their vacations.  I don’t blame them!

Next week, the third season concludes!

I Watched Fatal Exposure (2025, Dir. by Sam Coyle)

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

Red flags, girls!  You need to know how and when to spot them!

Photographer Ariel (Sofia Masson) is the victim of a violent home invasion and her sex buddy Derek (Stephen Huszar) just happens to show up a minute later?  Red flag!

The only photograph from Ariel’s exhibit that sells is an erotic selife called “No Daddy Issues” and then Derek suddenly wants to be called “daddy” while in the bedroom?  Guess what?  That’s a red flag!

Derek invites Ariel to his estate for the summer without telling her that he’s a widower and that he has a stepdaughter named Chloe (Jasmine Vaga)?  You better believe that’s a red flag!

Chloe is the same age as Ariel and physically resembles Ariel and calls her stepfather “daddy?”  Red flag, red flag, red flag!

I watched this movie because it was about a photographer and there really aren’t that many non-documentaries about photographers.  I didn’t think that the selfie that Ariel sold was that impressive but some of her other photographs showed a hint of talent.  But a photographer has to be aware of the world around her and she has to be able to see the things that other people miss.  That’s what distinguishes a photographer from someone who just has a camera.  How could any photographer miss all the red flags and all the strange atmosphere inside of Derek’s estate?

(I did like that Ariel had somehow developed a system to allow her to develop film and make prints within seconds.  I’d love to know how she did that.)

Fatal Exposure requires a big suspension of disbelief.  If you can do it, then the film itself is enjoyably trashy.  Derek’s gothic mansion is a great location and the acting wasn’t bad at all.  But you just have to be willing to accept that someone could miss all of those red flags.  Derek was too obviously evil from the start but he did give Ariel a nice studio to work in.  Maybe he wasn’t all bad.

 

Come On Get Happy: The Partridge Family Story (1999, directed by David Burton Morris)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

In 1969, a group of television network executives get together and decide the world needs a sitcom that will mix music with family comedy.  The result is The Partridge Family.  While Shirley Jones (Eve Gordon) tries to keep her television family safe from the networks and, in some cases, their own dysfunctional families, David Cassidy (Rodney Scott) struggles with being a teen idol and Danny Bonaduce (Shawn Pyfrom) deals with living with an abusive father (William Russ).  Danny finds a new father figure in the form of co-star Dave Madden (Michael Cheiffo) while Danny dates his tv sister, Susan Dey (Kathy Wagner).

This was one of the many made-for-TV movies that took advantage of boomer nostalgia at the turn of the 20th Century.  Like most of those movies, Come On Get Happy is on the shallow side, providing the details that everyone had already heard without digging too far underneath the surface.  The main thing that sets this film apart from so many other behind-the-scenes movies is that the cast, for the most part, actually resemble the real-life people that they’re playing.  That’s especially true in the case of Shawn Pyfrom.  If you’re a fan of the show or Cassidy’s music, this movie might appeal to you.  I Think I Love You is still a banger.

It’s well-made but it’s still hard not to feel that it would have been more entertaining just to watch a 2-hour interview with the real-life Danny Bonaduce.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 4.7 “Missing Hours”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, it’s the most infamous episode of Miami Vice ever!

Episode 4.7 “Missing Hours”

(Dir by Ate De Jong, originally aired on November 13th, 1987)

This is an episode that I had been waiting for years to see.  From the moment I decided to review Miami Vice, I started to read about and hear about this seventh episode of the four season.  This was the episode was supposedly so bad that many people consider it to be the point that Miami Vice “jumped the shark.”  This is the episode were James Brown plays a white-suited singer named Lou de Long, who has going from performing songs to giving lectures about UFOs.  (James Brown is essentially playing himself, right down to the presence of I Feel Good on the soundtrack.)  This is the episode where Trudy disappears for 12 hours and then returns with no firm memories of where she was.  This is the episode where even Crockett and Tubbs see a UFO.  Even though his appearance here does not receive as much attention as much a James Brown’s, Chris Rock made his television debut as a nerdy technician named Carson who was into UFOs.  Carson mentions getting his information for “computer bulleting boards” and everyone looks at him as if he’s speaking Esperanto.

This is the episode that is frequently cited as being the worst in Miami Vice history and really, who am I to disagree?

It pains me to say that.  I really wanted to like this episode, just because it is so strange and and I’ve always been a bit of a contrarian at heart but …. no, this episode really doesn’t work.  The sad truth of the matter is that, for all of his other talents, James Brown was a lousy actor and, with the exception of Michael Talbott and Philip Michael Thomas (who both appear to be having fun), the regular cast gives performance that suggest they all knew this episode was a bad idea.  Miami Vice was at its best when it was a cynical and downbeat show about the futility of the war on drugs.  There’s really no reason for Miami Vice to ever do a science fiction-themed episode.  Somehow, this is the second such episode to air during the fourth season.

Of course, the episode’s most unforgivable sin is that it ends with Trudy waking up in bed.  Not only is that ending a cop out but it’s also pretty rude to anyone who was actually trying to follow the plot or who was actually worried about whether or not Trudy had been brainwashed by the aliens.  Perhaps if this had been a Halloween episode, all of this could have been excused but apparently, this episode aired in the middle of November.

Poor Trudy.  Seriously, Olivia Brown didn’t really get many episode built around her character.  It’s a shame that, when they gave her one, it was this one.  Next week on Miami Vice, who knows?  I’m on vacation.  We’ll see what happens!

Brad’s “Scene of the Day” features Charles Bronson on a Bulldozer!

Posted on by Bradley Crain

We’re watching THE MECHANIC (1972) on our #MondayMuggers live tweet tonight (see my prior post for the details). The film is a character study of an aging hitman, that just happens to feature some awesome action sequences. In case you’re on the fence about joining us, here’s a little taste of badassery to whet your appetite!

Lifetime Film Review: Kidnapped By A Killer: The Heather Robinson Story (dir by Lee Gabiana)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

John Robinson has been described as being the Internet’s first serial killer.

I don’t know if that’s an accurate description but it is true that Robinson, who most of his neighbors and family knew as just being a somewhat eccentric businessman who always seemed to be in trouble with the IRS, did make contact with several of his victims in online chatrooms.  No one is quite sure how many women Robinson killed in the 80s and the 90s.  Robinson himself has given contradictory numbers.  What is know is that Robinson started out by luring women to his home by claiming that he had a job for them.  Many of the women who accepted his job offer were either never seen again or their bodies were eventually found on his properties in Kansas and Missouri.  Eventually, after serving time on fraud conviction, Robinson started to use internet chatrooms to find his victims.  He used the screenname Slavemaster, something that would have undoubtedly stunned all of his neighbors.

In Kidnapped By A Killer, Steve Guttenberg plays John Robinson.  Now, it should be noted that Guttenberg doesn’t get much screentime and he’s also nearly unrecognizable under a ton of old age makeup.  Guttenberg plays Robinson as being a creepy old man who uses the fact that he walks with a cane to put people at ease.  The film doesn’t spend much time with Robinson and it doesn’t show any of his murders.  Instead, the focus is on the police who investigated Robinson and also on Heather Robinson, a young woman who was Robinson’s adoptive niece but who was also the daughter of one of Robinson’s victims.  After killing her mother, Robinson “gave” Heather to his brother and sister-in-law, telling them that her mother had been a drug addict who abandoned her baby.

The majority of the film focuses on Heather (Rachel Stubington), who is a teenager when John is arrested for the murders that he committed.  Heather struggles to come to terms with the knowledge that her uncle — who seemed kindly, if a bit corny — murdered her mother and that she was essentially kidnapped and given away.  What seemed like an act of kindness — Uncle John not wanting a drug addict’s daughter to get lost in the system — was actually John Robinson’s attempt to cover up his crimes.  Much like the criminal who starts a business to launder money, Heather’s adoption was John’s attempt to launder evidence.  Stubington does a good job as Heather, capturing her struggle to come to terms with her identity.  The scenes of her dealing with her feelings towards John and the scenes of hardened detectives recoiling in shock as they discover the remains of John’s victims all serve as a reminder that murder is not an isolated crime.  It’s something that effects communities and families long after the act itself has been completed.

Kidnapped By A Killer deserves credit for focusing on a victim instead of on John Robinson, himself.  Too often, when it comes to true crime movies, the victims are forgotten while the serial killer gets all the best lines and the big moments.  Kidnapped By A Killer presents John Robinson as being a rather pathetic old man and that’s perhaps the best thing about it.

The Films of 2025: Emmanuelle (dir by Audrey Diwan)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

This film is taking itself way too seriously….

I had that thought 16 minutes into Emmanuelle.  A remake of the wonderfully trashy 70s film that made a star (of sorts) out of Sylvia Kristel, this version of Emmanuelle takes itself way too seriously.  It should be noted that no one is under the impression that the original Emmanuelle films or any of the unofficial spin-offs were high art.  The first film may have pretended to be about something but, ultimately, it was a trashy sex romp that was made because some folks wanted to make a lot of money.  That’s one reason why the original film and Kristel’s version of the character continue to be popular.  Both were totally shameless and unapologetic.

The remake, though, is boring.  Emmanuelle (played by Noemie Merlant) even has a boring job.  She works in quality control for a large chain of luxury hotels.  That’s right, quality control.  This film reimagines Emmanuelle as being the female version of Creed from The Office  Emmanuelle has been sent to Hong Kong so that she can evaluate a hotel that is being managed by Margot (Naomi Watts).  The company has tasked Emmanuelle with finding an excuse to fire Margot and Emmanuelle is feeling conflicted about it.  Let me tell you, there’s nothing sexier than quality control.

Emmanuelle has several sexual experiences while staying at the hotel.  The sensuality of Hong Kong gets to her.  While wearing a towel, she flirts with a nervous room steward.  She touches herself in front of an escort who hangs out at the hotel’s pool and she gets upset when Margot sends the escort and her friends away.  Emmanuelle wanders through the film with a blank expression on her face, staring at things that are often happening off-camera.  Hong Kong is presented as being a world where everything is for sale and no desires are forbidden.  If this was one of Joe D’Amato’s Black Emanuelle films, the decadence would probably be strange and entertaining.  However, since this is an Emmanuelle film that takes itself seriously, it’s kind of boring.

In fact, this film really does get caught up in the whole “Will Emmanuelle get Margot fired?” plot.  That is probably the least interesting part of the movie but the filmmakers really do want us to understand that Emmanuelle could lose her job if she doesn’t give Margot a bad report.  But honestly, who cares?  This film makes the mistake of assuming that “quality control” is a lot more exciting than it actually is.

Emmanuelle does fall in love over the course of the film.  Kei (Will Sharpe) is an enigmatic guest who hasn’t had sex in “two or three years” because he lost his desire.  He’s suffering from ennui!  Emmanuelle yells at Kei for smoking in the hotel but she’s attracted to him as well.  At least, that’s what the film wants us to believe.  Merchant and Sharpe have so little chemistry — romantic or sexual — that it’s hard to really care.  They have some philosophical discussions, the type of stuff that even Zalman King would have dismissed as being rather pretentious.

The main problem, as I said before, is that this film just isn’t fun.  It gets bogged down with its plot and Merlant, Watts, and Sharpe all sleepwalk through their roles.  This film should have been glorious trash.  Instead, it’s just dull.

#MondayMuggers present THE MECHANIC (1972) starring Charles Bronson & Jan-Michael Vincent!

Posted on by Bradley Crain

Every Monday night at 9:00 Central Time, my wife Sierra and I host a “Live Movie Tweet” event on X using the hashtag #MondayMuggers. We rotate movie picks each week, and our tastes are quite different. Tonight, Monday June 16th, we are showing THE MECHANIC (1972) starring Charles Bronson, Jan-Michael Vincent, Keenan Wynn, Jill Ireland, and Frank DeKova.

In THE MECHANIC, Charles Bronson plays a hitman who takes on a young apprentice (Jan-Michael Vincent) and trains him to be a professional assassin. But in their world, you never know when you’ll go from being the killer… to becoming the next target!

I reviewed THE MECHANIC for The Shattered Lens back on New Year’s Day!

THE MECHANIC (1972) – Celebrate the New Year with one of Charles Bronson’s most iconic roles!

Join us tonight for #MondayMuggers and watch THE MECHANIC! It’s on Amazon Prime. The trailer is included below:

I Watched Day of Reckoning (2025, Dir. by Shaun Silva)

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

In this modern day western, Billy Zane plays a U.S. Marshal who recruits a down on his luck sheriff (Zach Roerig) to help him capture a banker robber (Scott Adkins).  Zane goes out to Adkins’s ranch and holds Adkins’s wife (Cara Jade Myers) hostage.  Roerig is not okay with this, especially since he thinks that Zane and his men have ulterior motives for wanting to track Adkins.  Eventually, some other yahoos show up, all wanting to join Zane’s posse, setting up a final violent showdown and Roerig having to decide which side he’s on.

Day of Reckoning had the right, dusty look and the acting was decent but it took forever for the action to actually start.  Instead, there were way too many scenes of Roerig bonding with Myers, who spent nearly the entire running time handcuffed in a bathtub.  Scott Adkins is a martial artist who has a huge online following but he didn’t get to show off any of his skills in the movie so I’m not sure what the point of casting him was.  Trace Adkins (no relation to Scott) and Mike Wolfe (from American Pickers) are also in the movie and I’m always happy to see them.  Rapper Yelawolf, who was supposed to be the next big thing 15 years ago, is also in Day of Reckoning.  He plays the imaginatively named Wolf.  I liked Billy Zane’s performance but it was mostly just because he was Billy Zane.  (I even liked him in Titanic because it’s impossible not to like Billy Zane.)  There’s nothing that interesting or surprising about his character.  It’s obvious that he’s going to turn out to be bad from the first moment he shows up.

Once the action does start up, it’s decent.  I just wish there had been more of it and less scenes of everyone standing around giving each other the evil eye.

 

Song of the Day: Ode To The Texas Rangers by Mark Singletary Band

Posted on by Dazzling Erin

I was searching for something on YouTube when I came across this song.  From 1975 to 1980, this song was played before every Rangers home game and also after every Rangers victory!  I listened to it and I loved it.  I wish they still played it.

As for my Rangers this season, they’ve currently got a 36-36 record and they’re in third place in the AL West.  Luckily, there’s still a lot of baseball to be played and the Astros are only leading by five games.  That’s one thing I love about baseball.  You’re never really out of contention, unless you’re the White Sox.

Go Rangers!