Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 3.17 “The Afternoon Plane”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, Tubbs has an adventure!

Episode 3.17 “The Afternoon Plane”

(Dir by David Jackson, originally aired on February 20th, 1987)

While attending a New Age-y wedding with his latest girlfriend Alicia (Maria McDonald), Tubbs wins a vacation to a tropical island!

It’s about time something …. well, I was going to say something good but honestly, I guess we should just be happy that anything is happening to Tubbs at all.  When this show started, Tubbs was the audience surrogate.  He was the one who came down to Miami and learned about the drug scene.  We saw Miami through his eyes.  But, by the time the third season rolled around, it was pretty clear that Miami Vice hard largely become the Crockett show.  Don Johnson was the star and Philip Michael Thomas often seemed like a supporting character.  Tubbs may have been cooler than Switek but, often times, both of them took a backseat to Crockett.  This week, however, Tubbs finally get his own episode.  Crockett shows up for a few minutes at the start of the episode and that’s it.  This is the Tubbs show!

Of course, it turns out that the vacation does not go the way that Tubbs was expecting.  He runs into a drug dealer named Leon Wolf (Vincent D’Onofrio, making his television acting debut), someone who Tubbs previously put in jail.  Tubbs soon discovers that his old enemies, the Calderone family, are on the Island and they’re looking forward to getting their revenge on Tubbs.  Tubbs, of course, has no legal jurisdiction on the island and the local police certainly aren’t going to help him out.  In fact, many people on the island resent Tubbs because they blame America’s war on drugs for their poverty.  Drug smuggling is big business and it provides an income to a lot of people who would starve otherwise.

Orlando Calderone (John Leguizamo) is coming on the next afternoon plane and no one is willing to defy Orlando by helping Tubbs get off the island.  The episode becomes a Caribbean High Noon, with the clock ticking down and no one willing to stand up and help the endangered law man.  There are some on the island who want to fight back and drive away the Calderones.  But no one is willing to take the chance.

It would have been a lot more compelling if Orlando had been played by someone other than John Leguizamo, who is just as cartoonishly unconvincing here as he was the first time that he appeared on the show.  I know that Miami Vice was early in Leguizamo’s career but his performance here is so unconvincing that it really does make the Calderones just seem like a bunch of low-level punks instead of a feared criminal syndicate.  The final gun battle between Tubbs and the Calderones is handled well-enough but it’s never quite as compelling as it would be if Orlando Calderone was actually an intimidating villain.  In typical Miami Vice fashion, Alicia is seriously wounded in the battle.  It pays not to get involved with either Tubbs or Crockett.

This episode was a slight change of pace.  Apparently, everyone but Philip Michael Thomas got to take some time off during filming and, as a result, Thomas gets to show his own unique style as Rico Tubbs.  Still, this episode was never as compelling as it needed to be.  Hopefully, we are now done with the Calderones.

MacGruber (2010, directed by Jorma Taccone)


A nuclear warhead has been stolen and Captain Jim Faith (Powers Boothe) knows just who to recruit to track it down.  Former CIA agent MacGruber (Will Forte) agrees to come out of retirement, so he can save the world from Dieter Von Cunth (Val Kilmer), the man who blew up MacGruber’s fiancée (Maya Rudolph) on the day of their wedding.

MacGruber re-assembles his old team.  Sure, Vicki St. Elmo (Kristen Wiig) no longer wants to be a part of the adventure and MacGruber refuses work with Lt. Dixon Piper (Ryan Phillippe) but he still brings together a collection of men who look like they eat carburetors for breakfast.  And then he accidentally blows them up.  MacGruber’s assembling a new team!  While mentoring Dixon and falling in love with Vicki, MacGruber seeks his revenge on Cunth.  He also makes peace with his past by having sex with his fiancée’s ghost on her tombstone.

Based on the SNL skit that was itself based on a one-joke premise, MacGruber is a surprisingly entertaining action comedy, mixing frequently crude humor with heartfelt pathos.  MacGruber works because, even while it makes fun of action movies, it still respects the rules of the genre.  The jokes and the bullets fly with equal power.  MacGruber is an idiot but he’s also the only man who can save Washington from Cunth’s plot and Will Forte does an admirable job of delivering every bizarre line of dialogue with a fully committed straight face..  Val Kilmer plays Cunth as being a classic action villain, right down to his dismissive attitude and his long-winded speeches.  Kristen Wiig is both sexy and adorably awkward as the love interest.  And Ryan Phillippe does a surprisingly good job as the the one person who seems to understand how crazy MacGruber really is.  Every good comedy needs a good straight man and Ryan Phillippe proves himself to be more than up to the task.

MacGruber is full of quotable lines and scenes that are so out-there that you might need to rewind and confirm that you actually saw what you just did.  There have been a lot of bad Saturday Night Live movies.  MacGruber is one of the good ones.

Song of the Day: The Hunt by Jerry Goldsmith


The late composer Jerry Goldsmith was born 96 years ago today.  Over the course of his long career, he composed many classic film scores.  He was nominated for 18 Oscars and won for his score for The Omen.

Today’s song of the day comes from Goldsmith’s score for 1968’s Planet of the Apes!  Listen to this and try not visualize Charlton Heston being chased by a bunch of gorillas on horseback.

#MondayMuggers presents KINJITE: FORBIDDEN SUBJECTS (1989) starring Charles Bronson!


Every Monday night at 9:00 Central Time, my wife Sierra and I host a “Live Movie Tweet” event on X using the hashtag #MondayMuggers. We rotate movie picks each week, and our tastes are quite different. Tonight, Monday February 10th, we’re watching KINJITE: FORBIDDEN SUBJECTS starring Charles Bronson!

Back when I was a teenager, I would always get the entertainment section out of dad’s Sunday paper so I could check out the movie listings and see if there was a new movie I wanted to see. I would also look for information about my favorite movie star, Charles Bronson. Nowadays, we know about new movies months, even years, in advance, but back then I would first learn about them from the entertainment section of dad’s paper. I remember one Sunday in early 1989, seeing an advertisement for a new Charles Bronson film called KINJITE: FORBIDDEN SUBJECTS. It was the first time I had ever heard of the film. I knew I wasn’t going to get to see it at the movies because it was only playing in Little Rock, and it was rated R, but I was excited anyway because I knew it would be on its way to video pretty soon! 

In KINJITE: FORBIDDEN SUBJECTS, Charles Bronson plays police lieutenant Crowe. He deals with the sleaziest criminals in Los Angeles on a daily basis and it’s starting to take a toll on his personal life. He’s currently personally invested in bringing down an underage prostitution ring led by Duke (Juan Fernandez) and Lavonne (Sy Richardson). When a Japanese businessman’s young daughter is kidnapped by Duke, Crowe decides he must do everything in his power to get her back to her family. 

Here is some interesting trivia about the film:

  1. Beginning with DEATH WISH II (1982) Charles Bronson made 8 films for the infamous Cannon Group. KINJITE: FORBIDDEN SUBJECTS was the last of those films. The others are 10 TO MIDNIGHT (1983), DEATH WISH 3 (1985), MURPHY’S LAW (1986), ASSASSINATION (1987), DEATH WISH 4: THE CRACKDOWN (1987), and MESSENGER OF DEATH (1988). 
  2. Director J. Lee Thompson directed Charles Bronson in 9 different films, with KINJITE: FORBIDDEN SUBJECTS being the final film he ever directed. Charles Bronson loved working with the same directors once he got comfortable with them. Thompson, who directed classics like THE GUNS OF NAVARONE (1961) and CAPE FEAR (1962), always made sure Bronson’s low budget Cannon films were filmed in a competent and professional manner. 
  3. Nicole Eggert plays a teen prostitute in this film and Amy Hathaway plays Charles Bronson’s daughter. Both were appearing in popular sitcoms at the time. Eggert was starring in CHARLES IN CHARGE and Hathaway was in MY TWO DADS. 
  4. The bad guy in the film is played by Juan Fernandez. He’s played some great villains in his day. Actor James Woods told me this about Juan, “The irony is that Juan Fernandez is one of the nicest actors I’ve ever worked with, and yet one of the most truly frightening villains. His work in SALVADOR was superb. A lovely, talented man.” 
  5. Perry Lopez, who plays Bronson’s partner in the film had worked with Bronson twice before. He appeared with Bronson in the excellent 1954 western DRUM BEAT, and also in 1987’s DEATH WISH 4: THE CRACKDOWN. 

So join us tonight to for #MondayMuggers and watch KINJITE: FORBIDDEN SUBJECTS! It’s on Amazon Prime.

I’ve included the trailer below:

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us for Top Of The World!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasion ally Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 1998’s Top Of The World!

It should make for a night of fun viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto Mastodon, pull up Top of the World on YouTube, start the movie at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!

Enjoy!

 

Scenes I Love: Lon Chaney, Jr. Learns The Facts Of Werewolf Life


On this date, 115 years ago, Lon Chaney, Jr. was born in Oklahoma City.  At the time, Oklahoma wasn’t even a state.  His father was the actor Lon Chaney Sr.

Originally named Creighton Chaney, Lon Jr. followed in his father’s footsteps.  Like many sons of famous men, he often struggled to escape his father’s shadow.  While he would never be mistaken for a man of a thousand faces, Lon Chaney, Jr. did make a name for himself, first as Lenny in the Oscar-nominated 1939 film version of Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men and then as Larry Talbot, the unfortunate man who found himself cursed to turn into the Wolf Man whenever the moon was full.  Chaney spent the majority of his career appearing in horror films and, later, westerns.  Not only did he play The Wolf Man but he was also one of the many actors to take a shot at playing both Frankenstein’s Monster and Dracula.  Later, he would appear in a series of low budget horror films that were often a far cry from his best-known films.  In his later years, he was a favorite of producer/director Stanley Kramer, who cast him in both High Noon and The Defiant Ones and who once said that Chaney was one of the finest character actors in Hollywood.  His deep voice and craggily face made an undeniable impression in those later films.  Looking at him, you could see had lived a tough life but he had the heart of a survivor.

In today’s scene that I love, Larry Talbot learns the facts about being a werewolf.  From 1941’s The Wolf Man, here is Lon Chaney, Jr in his signature role.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Alexander Payne Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy birthday to director Alexander Payne!  It’s time for….

4 Shots from 4 Alexander Payne Films

Election (1999, dir by Alexander Payne, DP: James Glennon)

Sideways (2004, dir by Alexander Payne, DP: Phedon Papamichael)

The Descendants (2011, dir by Alexander Payne, DP: Phedon Papamichael)

Nebraska (2013, dir by Alexander Payne, DP: Phedon Papamichael)

 

Lisa Marie’s Week In Review: 2/3/25 — 2/9/25


Whoops!  I was so tired after returning home from some much needed hot tub time that I fell asleep before I got a chance to do my full week in review!  Here’s an abbreviated summary.

Films I Watched:

  1. Cannibal Apocalypse (1980)
  2. The Double (2011)
  3. 8th Round Pick (2020)
  4. The Forbidden Dance (1990)
  5. Lambada (1990)
  6. MacGruber (2020)
  7. Mouse of Horrors (2025)
  8. The Leech Woman (1960)
  9. Speedtrap (1977)

Television Shows I Watched Last Week:

  1. Abbott Elementary
  2. CHiPs
  3. Dark
  4. Fantasy Island
  5. Friday the 13th: The Series
  6. Hell’s Kitchen
  7. Highway to Heaven
  8. King of the Hill
  9. Kitchen Nightmares
  10. The Love Boat
  11. Malibu CA
  12. Miami Vice
  13. Monsters
  14. Pacific Blue
  15. Scamanda
  16. St. Elsewhere
  17. Super Bowl LXI

News From Last Week:

  1. Actor Tony Roberts Dies At 85
  2. Author Tom Robbins Dies At 92
  3. Jacques Audiard Hasn’t Spoken to Karla Sofía Gascón Since Her Apology: She’s Being Too ‘Self-Destructive’
  4. Anora Wins At The DGA and PGA

Links From Last Week:

  1. Have You Seen A Movie Rated Zero? One Reporter Watched Them All – Some With Big Stars Getting NO Stars!
  2. Going with the FLOW of Life
  3. Tater’s Week in Review 2/7/25

Click here for last week!  And hopefully, I’ll get more rest over this upcoming week so I can actually do a full week in review next Sunday!