Clownado: Movie preview, review and trailer.


Yes, you saw that movie title correctly: Clownado

And if you don’t believe it is a real movie: Here is the poster to prove it.

poster

WARNING: This movie contains extreme language, nudity, strong sexual content, and very intense scenes of gore. Not at all recommended for people who are sensitive to that!

Credits:

Directed by: Todd Sheets (Zombie Bloodbath franchise)

Stars:

Rachel Lagen, Joel D. Wynkoop Linnea Quigley and Eileen Dietz

Preview:

Cursed demonic circus clowns set out on a vengeful massacre using tornadoes. A stripper, Elvis impersonator, truck driver, teen runaway, and a dude get caught in the supernatural battle between femme fatal and the boss clown from hell.

Review:

Seriously, as some one who suffers from coulrophobia, I could not help but laugh at this movie. The plot is so ridiculous. The acting is beyond bad. The clowns are no more than juggalo wannabes in bad makeup. The writing seemed like it was made up on the spot by a really bad improve troop. The special effects were neither special nor effective. It, however, could have been a quality horror movie if they had spent a bit more money on the movie than they did on the opening credits.

I guess, as the press release says, “The Joke’s on you when Clownado blows in” and I did spend 1 hour and 34 minutes of my life watching this movie. pic

When can you see Clownado?

Wild Eye Releasing along with Extreme Entertainment will let the clowns blow thru your VOD September 3rd and touch down on your DVD’s September 17th!

Oh, you are still reading this preview / review and want to see the trailer for Clownado? Ok, but don’t say I didn’t send you a Clownado warning!

4 Shots From 4 Films: Happy Birthday Joan Blondell


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking. Hollywood Pre-Code Queen Joan Blondell was born on this date in 1906. After starring in vaudeville and on Broadway, Joan made her film debut in 1930, beginning a screen career that lasted 50 years, until her death in 1979 (her final film was released posthumously in 1981). In honor of one of my favorite stars of the Golden Age, here are 4 Shots from the Films of Joan Blondell (and be on the lookout for more on Joanie, coming next week!):

Blonde Crazy (1931; D: Roy Del Ruth)

Gold Diggers of 1933 (1933; D: Mervyn LeRoy)

Nightmare Alley (1947; D: Edmund Goulding)

Grease (1978; D: Randal Kleiser)

Happy Birthday, Joanie!

Music Video Of The Day: All My Friends Are Rich by UPSAHL (2019, dir by ????)


UPSAHL is already responsible for my favorite song of the year, Drugs.  And now, she’s responsible for my second favorite.

Poor UPSAHL.  All of her friends are drinking champagne and hanging out on their huge lawn and smoking expensive cigars and enjoying themselves the way that only people with money can.  Meanwhile, UPSAHL can’t even pay her rent or, to judge from this video, afford a decent lawn mower.

Now, of course, it’s also totally possible that her friends are just better at handling their money than UPSAHL.  The thing is …. when you don’t have much money, everyone around you seems like they’re rich and they don’t have a problem in the world.  I remember the first time I ever had to pay rent and I was shocked to discover that apparently the apartment manger was serious when he said that we had to pay by the end of the first week of the month.  Seriously, I just kinda figured that was just a general suggestion.  I remember very clearly thinking, “How does everyone else handle this so easily?”  Only later would I discover that no one was handling anything easily.

(Fortunately, I was able to pay my half of the rent.  I sold some of my friend’s college textbooks back to the student store and then I borrowed the rest from my mom.  So, I may not have been rich but I still survived.)

UPSAHL’s songs are so relatable and her DGAF attitude should be an inspiration to us all.

Enjoy!