This is really bad.
Richard Dice (Rob Lowe, wearing glasses and running around like a speed freak) is a loser who lives at home with his mother (Jessica James), his younger brother (Ira Heiden), and his mother’s boyfriend (Harry Carey, Jr.). When he gets called for jury duty, Richard thinks that he will be able to easily get out of it but then he discovers that the defendant is someone from his part, even if she does not remember a thing about him. Ever since the first grade, Richard has been in love with Molly (Colleen Camp) and now she is on trial for murder. Richard lies about knowing who she is and gets selected for the jury. When it starts to look like Molly might be convicted, Richard starts to investigate the murder himself. His investigation leads him to two teenage blackmail victims (played by Kim Myers and Bodganovich’s future wife, Louise Stratten) and a tape of the murder being committed. Illegally Yours attempts to be a screwball comedy but it just comes across as being frantic, with Lowe especially going overboard. The actors all speak quickly but that can not disguise how lame most of the dialogue is. The movie also comes with a clunky narration, a sure sign of post production desperation.
Made at a time when Peter Bogdanovich was mired in an expensive lawsuit over changes made to his previous film, Mask, Bogdanovich has said that he solely did Illegally Yours because he needed the money. Bogdanovich has accurately described Illegally Yours as being the worst film that he ever directed. Coming from the director of At Long Last Love, Nickelodeon, and Texasville, that is saying something.