Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 4.15 “Ponch’s Angels: Part Two”

Posted on September 29, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, Ponch continues to train Melanie and Paula.

Episode 4.15 “Ponch’s Angels: Part Two”

(Dir by John Florea, originally aired on March 1st, 1981)

We pick up where we stopped last week. A man and his girlfriend are stealing purses and wallets at the marina. Three escaped convicts are in a deserted house and digging for buried treasure. Ponch and Jon are having to train two new motorcycle cops, Paula (Barbara Stock) and Melanie (Trisha Townsend). When last we checked in, Ponch was kissing Melanie. This episode opens with Ponch telling Melanie that they can never kiss again.

Ponch and Baker continue to train Paula and Melanie. Ponch decides to switch with Baker. He trains Paula while Baker works with Melanie. But then almost the entire highway patrol comes down with the flu and, when Baker is put in charge while Getraer recovers at home, Ponch finds himself to work with both Paula and Melanie. Once again, it’s all on Ponch because it’s The Ponch Show!

It’s all a bit exhausting to try to keep up with, to be honest. Ponch and Baker spend this episode wondering whether or not women actually could handle being motorcycle cops. Baker especially seems to be confused at the idea of a woman driving a motorcycle. One gets the feeling that Ponch is just mad because he knows he’ll get fired if he tries to make a move on either woman. Almost this entire episode is made up of Ponch trying to keep track of who is riding with who.

Luckily, Paula and Melanie prove themselves by catching the purse snatchers and also helping to catch the escaped convicts. Good for them! At the end of the opposite, they toss their motorcycle helmets in the air and leap for joy. The picture freezes while Ponch and Baker have a good laugh.

I was not surprised to read that this episode was meant to be a backdoor pilot for a Paula/Melanie show. Stock and Townsend were both likable and they acted well opposite each other so I could actually imagine them starring in a fairly entertaining series. It didn’t happen, though. Maybe the network felt that Ponch and Jon didn’t need the competition.

This was an okay episode of The Ponch Show.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 4.14 “Ponch’s Angels: Part 1”

Posted on September 22, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Ponch protests having to do his job.

Episode 4.14 “Ponch’s Angels: Part 1”

(Dir by John Florea, originally aired on February 28th, 1981)

It’s a busy week for the Highway Patrol! The marina is full of tourists and carnival-goers. A group of escaped convicts are trying to get out of town. A man and his partner are stealing purses. But all of that pales in comparison to what Jon and Ponch are having to do.

Jon and Ponch are having to train rookies!

Even worse, from their perspective …. the rookies are women!

Ponch protests when he’s given the assignment to train enthusiastic and blonde Melanie Mitchell (Trisha Townsend). He tells Getraer that Melanie is attractive and that Getraer knows what happens when Ponch gets around attractive women. Getraer replies that he wants Ponch to train Melanie precisely because Ponch has so many girlfriends. A man with many girlfriends will be less likely to be tempted. Okay, Getraer, that’s interesting logic….

And it turns out that Getraer doesn’t know what he’s talking about because this episode ends with Ponch and Melania passionately locking lips. “TO BE CONTINUED” flashes on the screen so I guess we’ll get to the disciplinary hearing and the subsequent lawsuit next week.

As for Jon, he trains Paula Woods (Barbara Stock), who is as cool and reasonable as Melanie is enthusiastic and impulsive. Paula tries to flirt with Jon but Jon keeps it all business because Jon is capable of actually doing his job in a professional manner.

What’s odd about this episode is that it’s called Ponch’s Angels, even though Ponch is only training one of the new motorcycle cops. This season, even the episode titles were all about erasing Jon Baker!

Anyway, as I mentioned, this is the first part of a two-parter. Apparently, this episode was actually a backdoor pilot for a series that would have focused on Melanie and Paula and it’s easy to see that Melanie was created to be another Ponch while Paula was created to be a female Jon. Next week, we’ll see if Paula and Melanie can make use of the lessons they were taught by Jon and Ponch.

The Hollywood Knights (1980, directed by Floyd Mutrux)

Posted on June 12, 2025 by Jedadiah Leland

Halloween Night, 1965. While the high school holds a pep rally and the Beverly Hills Homeowners Association debate the best way to tackle the problem of juvenile delinquency, the Hollywood Knights hang out at Tubby’s Drive-In, their favorite burger joint. The Hollywood Knights are a car club and a group of fun-loving rebels, determined to have a good time and to always humiliate Officers Clark (Sandy Helberg) and Bimbeau (Gailard Sartain). In practice, this amounts to a lot of jokes about flatulence and Newcomb Turk (Robert Wuhl) mooning the cops every chance the he gets. I’m hoping a stunt butt was used for the mooning shots. If I had known watching Hollywood Knights would mean seeing Robert Wuhl’s bare ass a dozen times over 91 minutes, I wouldn’t have started the movie.

The humor is crude but the movie has a serious side, one that was cribbed from American Graffiti. Duke (Tony Danza), a senior member of the club, is upset that his girlfriend (Michelle Pfeiffer, in her film debut) is working as a car hop. He’s also sad that his buddy, Jimmy Shine (Gary Graham), is leaving in the morning for the Army. Jimmy’s not worried about being sent to Vietnam because Americans are only being sent over there as advisors. Hollywood Knights doesn’t end with a Graffiti-style epilogue but if it did, Jimmy would be the one who never came home. The serious scenes work better than the comedy, due to the performances of Gary Graham, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Tony Danza. I can’t believe I just said that either. Danza, though he’s way too old to be playing a high school student, is actually really good in this movie. Pfeiffer doesn’t get to do much but, from her first scene, it’s easy to see why she became a star. The camera loves her and she brings her character to life, despite not having much screen time.

Unfortunately, the drama takes a back seat to a lot of repetitive humor. The problem isn’t that the humor is crude. One thing that has always been true is that, regardless of the year, teenage boy humor is the crudest humor imaginable. Even back in prehistorical times, teenage boys were probably drawing dirty pictures on the walls of their caves. The problem is that the humor is boring and Robert Wuhl is even more miscast as a high school student as Tony Danza was. Fran Drescher plays a high school student with whom Turk tries to hook up. Drescher, like Pfeiffer, comes across as being a future star in the making. Robert Wuhl comes across as being the future creator of Arli$$.

The Hollywood Knights has a bittersweet ending, the type that says, “It’ll never be 1965 again.” This movie made me happy that it will never be 1965 again. 1965 should have sued The Hollywood Knights for slander. Hollywood Knights tried to mix the nostalgia of American Graffiti with the raunchiness of Animal House but it didn’t have the heart or creativity of either film. At least some of the member of the cast went onto better things.

Life Stinks (1991, directed by Mel Brooks)

Posted on January 29, 2025 by Jedadiah Leland

Goddard Bolt (Mel Brooks), the massively wealthy CEO of Bolt Enterprises, wants to buy up a huge area of Los Angeles’s slums and tear them down, transforming the area into a chic neighborhood and moving all of the poor residents and street people out. Rival businessman Vaughn Craswell (Jeffrey Tambor), who grew up in the slum and dreams of destroying it himself, has the same plan. He and Bolt make a bet. If Bolt can survive for 30 days on the streets, Craswell will allow Bolt to have the property. Bolt agrees and soon, he is penniless and sleeping in alleys. While Bolt befriends Sailor (Howard Morris) and Fumes (Theodore Wilson) and falls in love with a former dancer named Molly (Lesley Ann Warren), Craswell schemes to take over Bolt’s company and keep Bolt on the streets permanently.

Life Stinks was one of Mel Brooks’s attempts to make a straight comedy that wasn’t a parody and which had a serious message underneath the laughs. The mix of comedy and drama doesn’t really gel, because the drama is too dark and the comedy is too cartoonish. Life Stinks is often guilty of romanticizing living on the streets. With the exception of two muggers, everyone whom Bolt meets is a saint. It is still interesting to see Brooks creatively at his most heartfelt and humanistic.

Life Stinks does feature some of Mel Brooks’s best work as an actor and it’s also features an excellent turn from Lesley Anne Warren. At first, I thought Warren would be miscast as a woman who spent her days in a soup kitchen and her nights sleeping in an alley. But she actually gives a very sweet and believable performance.

No matter what else, Mel Brooks is a true mensch.

A Movie A Day #192: Betrayal of the Dove (1993, directed by Strathford Hamilton)

Posted on July 19, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before.

Ellie West (Helen Slater) has a 7 year-old daughter (Heather Lind), a sleazy ex-husband (Alan Thicke), a vampy best friend (Kelly LeBrock), and a pair of inflamed tonsils that need to come out. When she goes in the hospital for what should be a routine procedure, she nearly dies on the operation table. Something went wrong with the anaesthesia. But what, why, and how? Fortunately, Doctor Jesse Peters (Billy Zane) was there to save Ellie’s life. Even as Ellie, with the encouragement of her best friend, starts to go out with Jesse, she still suspects that someone is trying to kill both her and her daughter.

While the title may sounds like an early 90s Merchant Ivory production, Betrayal of the Dove is actually just another “erotic” thriller, the type that used to show up exclusively on late night Cinemax. The only thing that distinguished Betrayal of the Dove was the cast, which mixed B-movie stalwarts like Kelly LeBrock and Billy Zane with actors who usually did not appear in movies like this. Alan Thicke was surprisingly good as a sleazy, abusive alcoholic and both Stuart Pankin and David L. Lander were cast in serious roles.

Perhaps the most surprising casting was that of veteran television comedian and Mel Brooks regular, Harvey Korman. In the role of Ellie’s boss, Harvey not only played a serious role here but, at the end of the movie, he also got to save the day. I’m not sure if Harvey did his own stunt work but if you have ever wanted to see Harvey Korman as an action hero, Betrayal of the Dove is as close as you’re going to get.

Or you could just watch Blazing Saddles again.

A Movie A Day #114: Scavenger Hunt (1979, directed by Michael Schultz)

Posted on May 1, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

When game designer Milton Parker (Vincent Price) dies, all of his greedy relatives and his servants gather for the reading of his will. Parker’s lawyer, Benstein (Robert Morley), explains that Parker is leaving behind a $200 million dollar estate to whoever can win an elaborate scavenger hunt. Dividing into five teams, the beneficiaries head out to track down as many items as they can by five o’clock that evening. Among the items that they have to find: a toilet, a cash register, an ostrich, a microscope, and an obese person. Hardy har har.

The five teams are made up of a who’s who of sitcom and television actors who had time to kill in 1979. The Odd Couple‘s Tony Randall is Henry Motely, who is Parker’s son-in-law and who works with his four children. Soap‘s Richard Mulligan plays a blue-collar taxi driver named Marvin Dummitz (because funny names are funny) who teams up with his friend, Merle (Stephen Furst). The Mary Tyler Moore Show‘s Cloris Leachman (an Oscar winner, no less) gets stuck with the role of Milton’s greedy sister, Mildred. She works with her conniving lawyer (Richard Benjamin) and her stupid son (Richard Masur). Maureen Teefy plays Milton’s niece while his nephews are played by Willie Aames and Dirk Benedict. Cleavon Little, James Coco, Roddy McDowall, and Stephanie Faracy play the servants.

It doesn’t stop there, though. Avery Schreiber plays a zookeeper. Meat Loaf plays a biker who beats up Richard Benjamin. Ruth Gordon, Stuart Pankin, Pat McCormick, and Scatman Crothers all have cameos. Even Arnold Schwarzenegger makes an appearance as a gym instructor who knocks Tony Randall out of a second story window.

There are a lot of famous people in Scavenger Hunt. It’s just too bad that the movie itself is barely watchable and not at all funny. It tries to go for the zaniness of It’s A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World but, unless watching Willie Aames steal a clown head from Jack in the Box is your idea of hilarity, the film never comes close to succeeding. Michael Schultz directed some classic films (like Car Wash) during the 1970s but, unfortunately, he also directed Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band and this.

Scavenger Hunt used to show up on a late night television, where it was always advertised as starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. (He barely has five minutes of screentime.) It was released on DVD/Blu-ray earlier this year but watching for the cameos is the only reason to take part in this Scavenger Hunt.

Embracing the Melodrama #36: Fatal Attraction (dir by Adrian Lyne)

Posted on July 8, 2014 by Lisa Marie Bowman

(This review has spoilers because I felt like it and I’ll do whatever the Hell I want.)

Today, we continue embracing the melodrama by taking a look at the 1987 best picture nominee, Fatal Attraction.

Fatal Attraction opens on a scene of domestic bliss, with lawyer Dan Gallagher (Michael Douglas) and his wife Beth (Anne Archer) in their luxurious Manhattan apartment, getting ready to go out for the night and waiting for the babysitter to arrive. Dan would appear to have it all: a successful career, a fat best friend, and a beautiful wife. However, when Beth and their daughter go out of town for the weekend, Dan ends up having an affair with Alex (Glenn Close). Dan assumes that it was just a weekend thing but Alex is soon stalking Dan. Trying to escape her, Dan moves his family out to the suburbs but Alex follows them. Soon, pet rabbits are being killed, Alex is breaking into the house with a knife, and it’s up to Beth to step up and reclaim her man.

I have to admit that I have mixed feelings about Fatal Attraction. On the one hand, it’s an undeniably well-made film. It’s well-acted and director Adrian Lyne pushes all of the right emotional buttons and keeps the action moving quickly. That the film is predictable doesn’t make it any the less effective. As a lover of horror movies, I appreciated the skill with which Lyne crafted the film’s scare scenes. Watching the movie, it was easy to see why Fatal Attraction was a huge box office success and why it continues to influence our culture to this very day.

And yet, at the same time, Fatal Attraction really annoys me.

The film is so well-made and so manipulative that it’s easy to miss the fact that Dan Gallagher is not only never punished for betraying his wife but he’s actually not held responsible for his actions in any way. Instead, the only person who is truly punished for their transgression is Alex. The film, after all, makes clear that Alex is the one pursuing Dan. In fact, it could be argued that when it comes to Dan and Alex, the traditional gender roles have been reversed. Alex (who, as opposed to the idealized Beth, has a name that is both masculine and feminine) is the aggressive one while Dan is the passive one who gives into temptation and, afterwards, feels guilty. After admitting his transgression, Dan is allowed to reclaim his manhood and continue on with his perfect life. However, Alex has no place in conventional society and therefore, she must be destroyed.

And so much the better if she’s destroyed by Beth, a woman who has no problem with accepting a traditionally domestic role.

Far too often, in the past, I know that my girl friends and I always assumed that men were simply incapable of resisting temptation. Therefore, if your boyfriend cheated on you, it really was not his fault. He was just being a guy. Instead, it was the other woman’s fault because she was the one who tempted him. (And, though we acknowledged this a lot less, it was also his girlfriend’s fault for allowing him to get into a position where he could be tempted in the first place.) But it was never truly guy’s fault and, as long as you made him suffer for a bit, it was always expected that you would forgive him and take him back.

That’s the same mentality that runs through Fatal Attraction (not to mention countless daytime talk shows where girlfriends and wives always beat up mistresses while their boyfriend or husband stands over to the side and watches, untouched). Yes, Dan did cheat on his perfect wife and yes, he feels terrible about it. But the real threat comes from the woman who pursued him despite knowing that he was married and then, afterwards, had the nerve to demand not to be ignored. (If anything, the film seems to be suggesting that everything would have been okay if Dan had just fucked someone who works in his office, as opposed to someone who he can’t control through money or the threat of societal shaming.) When, at the end of the film, Beth shoots Alex, it’s a crowd-pleasing moment but it’s also Beth’s way of reclaiming her man. Since Dan — being male — can’t be expected to exercise any sort of self-control, it’s the responsibility of Beth to step up and destroy the temptation.

For not respecting the vows of marriage, Alex is a monster who must be destroyed. Dan, on the other hand, is merely inconvenienced and ultimately, he ends up with a far stronger marriage as a result of having strayed.

In Fatal Attraction, the only thing more dangerous than sex with Alex is examining subtext.