Spring Break On The Lens: The Real Cancun (dir by Rick de Oliveira)

Posted on March 7, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Remember The Real Cancun?

This 2003 film tells the story of 16 good-looking and not particularly intelligent college students who go to Cancun for spring break. For 8 days, they all live in the same beach house and they get to know each other. They drink. They flirt. A few of them hook up but perhaps not as many as you would expect. The dorky virgin dude says that he just wants to see “boobies” and then gets drunk off of one shot. Two platonic friends debate whether they should take their relationship to the next level. The women wear bikinis. The men wear speedos. There are bare boobs and behinds galore. Snoop Dogg makes a special guest appearance. One spring breaker get stung by a jelly fish so her new roommate pours a cup of urine on her ankle. Good thing he had already had ten beers that morning! What fun!

If this sounds like a typical spring break film, that’s because it is a typical spring break film but with one big difference. It was produced by the people behind MTV’s The Real World and, as such, the 16 spring breakers are sold as being real people who are spontaneously acting like a bunch of movie characters. In 2003, reality tv was still a relatively exotic concept and this film was an attempt to take the genre’s cheap aesthetic to the cinematic level. Even more importantly, it was an attempt to duplicate the success of Girls Gone Wild, without actually admitting to being inspired by that sleazy enterprise. As such, there’s a lot of nudity but there’s a strange lack of actual sex. There’s a lot of drinking but there’s not much drunkenness. It’s an oddly tame look at spring break, one that promises debauchery but which doesn’t deliver anything that would have kept the film out of theaters or off the cable networks. I got more wild on my spring breaks than anyone in this film and I don’t even drink.

The film’s “stars” are all pretty bland and it’s not a surprise that, with one exception, none of them have appeared in anything other than The Real Cancun. (That one exception is Laura Ramsey, who went on to have a somewhat busy acting career after appearing as herself in this film.) The film manages to make nudity boring. Seen today, The Real Cancun works best as a time capsule, largely because it was filmed at a time when there was no social media and, even more importantly, no phones. Everyone is attracted to the crew and their bulky film cameras because there aren’t any other cameras around to record them and make them famous. Today, anyone can make their own Real Cancun and post it to YouTube. In 2003, if you wanted a shot at that type of fame, you had to audition and be selected to appear in a “documentary.”

Apparently, The Real Cancun was meant to be the first part of a Real World cinematic franchise. The first Jackass film had come out the previous year so MTV was enthusiastic about producing cheap reality movies. However, The Real Cancun was such a huge flop at the box office that it killed those plans. There would be other Jackass films, of course. But the Real World Cinematic Universe imploded as soon as it began. And for that, we should probably be thankful.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 2/27/22 — 3/5/22

Posted on March 5, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Yes, I watched a lot this week. Here’s some thoughts:

Allo Allo (Monday Morning, PBS)

Rene attempted to abandon his wife and his café so that he could elope with Yvette but Michelle had one “last” mission for him. It involved smuggling the Enigma machine to the British via the sewer system and, needless to say, it involved a lot of digging. It made me laugh, that’s what is important.

The Amazing Race (Wednesday Night, CBS)

You can read my thoughts on the finale here! I wasn’t particularly happy about who won but that’s the way it goes sometimes.

American Idol (Sunday Night, ABC)

I am as stunned as anyone by the fact that American Idol still exists. I stopped caring about the show a lifetime ago but I still watched the premiere of the latest season on Sunday because I was cleaning around the house and I thought it would make for acceptable background nose. I love Katy Perry but the rest of the judges are pretty dull. No one’s willing to be as mean as Simon Cowell was back in the day. The whole thing is just too damn positive.

The Bachelor (Monday Night, ABC)

I haven’t really been keeping up with this season but I did watch Monday’s episode, just to see if the Claytonbot had developed any sort of individual personality over the past few weeks. He has not but apparently, everyone can still see themselves falling in love with him and spending the rest of their life with him.

Bar Rescue (Friday Morning, Paramount)

It had been a while since I watched Bar Rescue so I watched the Friday morning bloc of reruns. I guess, due to the fact that I don’t drink, I always find it amusing how worked up everyone on the show gets over the mismanaged bars. Whenever Taffer starts to yell about a bartender not knowing how to make a certain cocktail, I’m always like, “Well, can’t you just order something else?”

Couples Court With The Cutlers (Sunday Afternoon, OWN TV)

I had forgotten this show existed but when I stumbled across it on Sunday, I have to admit that I immediately got sucked into the case of Bacon vs. Bacon and the question of whether or not Mrs. Bacon was cheating on Mr. Bacon. They even brought in a cybersecurity expert to go through Mrs. Bacon’s phone and it was discovered that she was using an app to send out secret text messages! Mrs. Bacon claimed she was talking to other men but not actually cheating with them. However, “licensed polygraph examiner Kendall Shull,” (as he’s called in every single episode) determined that she was cheating. Mr. Bacon walked out on her husband while the audience gasped. Poor Mr. Bacon! I later looked this episode up on the imdb and I discovered that it was 5 years old so I can only imagine how the Bacons feel whenever they come across it playing on TV.

Court Cam (Wednesday, A&E)

To be honest, I thought this show had been canceled but, on Wednesday, I discovered that it still exists and it’s going strong. Featuring actual court footage and breathlessly narrated by Dan Abrams, Court Cam is the equivalent of true crime junk food. I watched about four episodes. Judges yelled. Defendants yelled. The bailiffs were ready to spring into action. The lawyers were usually smart enough to stay out of the way.

The Dropout (Hulu)

I wrote about the latest Hulu miniseries here!

Full House (Sunday Afternoon, MeTV)

Uncle Jesse was upset that he wasn’t getting to spend as much time with his cool friends as he wanted to because he was always spending all of his time taking care of Danny’s children. So, Jesse went skiing with his old friends but they all turned out to be just as dorky as Joey and Danny so I kind of think Jesse was fooling himself as far as the old gang was concerned. Jesse’s life didn’t get any better in the episode that followed, as he was forced to take a job as an Elvis impersonator to pay the bills. Poor Jesse! At least he had adequate hair.

Inventing Anna (Netflix)

I watched episodes 3, 4, and 5 of Inventing Anna early Monday morning. They didn’t do too much for me, largely because Vivian isn’t a very interesting character and every minute that we have to spend listening to her whine about her career is a minute that we’d rather be spending with Anna and her wealthy friends. This show makes a lot more sense once you know that the journalist upon whom Vivian Kent is based is also one of the producers. She made the mistake of thinking she was the star of the story.

King of the Hill (Hulu and FXX)

On Sunday morning, I watched three episodes of King of the Hill on Hulu. The first featured the possibility of Bobby being a reincarnated holy man. The second found Peggy getting involved with a pyramid scheme. (“No, it’s a triangle.”) And the third featured Hank getting a haircut from Bill and then demanding that the Army charge him for it. It turns out that it costs $900 for the army to give a man a haircut.

I watched two episodes of FXX on Wednesday. One episode featured Hank becoming the substitute shop teacher and teaching the kids how to fix things. Unfortunately, he had the kids bring tools from home and that got him fired. I love this episode, largely because of the wonderful voice over work of the late Dennis Burkley, who played Principal Moss. This was followed by Aisle 8A, in which Connie spent a memorable few days with the Hills and Hank had to find the courage to take a trip down Aisle 8A.

Law & Order (Thursday Night, NBC)

I watched the latest episode of Law & Order to see if McCoy had gotten around to firing his ludicrously idealistic Executive D.A. yet. He had not.

This week’s episode was based on the relationship of Elizabeth Holmes and Sunny Balwani so it was interesting to watch it after having binged the first three episodes of The Dropout. It was an okay episode, even if it still sometimes seemed to be trying a bit too hard. The Law & Order revival needs to calm down a little and give the new characters (and the actors playing them) a chance to define who they are.

I kept hoping the ghost of Adam Schiff would materialize and rasp, “Take the deal….”

Law & Order: SVU (Thursday Night, NBC)

What if Joe Rogan confessed to a decades-old murder!? Well, I guess you’d have to send someone in undercover to catch him. This was not one of SVU‘s better episodes.

The Love Boat (Sunday Evening, MeTV)

On Sunday’s cruise, Kim Richards played a 13 year-old who, after putting on a good deal of makeup and taking off her glasses, could pass for a 22 year-old. Fortunately, Gopher found out the truth about her age before committing a crime. Meanwhile, Eve Plumb learned to forgive the man who she thought was her father for walking out on the family 20 years earlier. Yay! Quite a cruise.

Open All Hours (Monday Morning, PBS)

A woman wished Granville a happy birthday so Arkwright pushed Granville off of a step ladder. This is something that appeared to happen fairly frequently with Granville. He was always getting shoved off something. Poor guy.

Pam and Tommy (Hulu)

I reviewed the latest episode of Pam & Tommy here. Unfortunately, the character of Rand Gauthier has returned. I’m glad this show is almost over.

The SAG Awards (Sunday Night, TNT)

I caught the second airing of the awards. It was nice to see CODA win the award for Best Ensemble. I loved Marlee Matlin’s speech.

Secrets of Playboy (Monday Night, A&E)

This A&E docuseries is all about exposing Hugh Hefner as being kind of a creep. The episodes that I saw on Monday certainly accomplished that goal. It’s kind of amazing that, for years, Hefner was able to get away with presenting himself as being some sort of benevolent father figure when basically, he was just a jerk with a mansion and smoking jacket.

Silk Stalkings (IMDB TV)

On Wednesday, I returned to binging Silk Stalkings. I started with the 35th episode of the series, which was called Dead Weight and featured Chris and Rita investigating the murder of a businessman who was played by John O’Hurley. I was pretty sure that I had seen this episode before but no matter. It was fun and trashy and O’Hurley played his brief role like a soap opera villain come to life. The 36th episode was called Kid Stuff and it told the story of a 17 year-old prostitute who shot her older lover’s wife. The older man was a doctor who was played by the great Andrew Stevens. Even by the standards of Silk Stalkings, this was a sordid episode but that’s one of the fun things about Silk Stalkings. It may have been shameless but it also clearly wasn’t meant to be taken seriously. Later, that night, I watched the 37th episode, in which Chris and Rita investigated a shooting that was connected to a couple’s kinky sex game. That said, Chris was more concerned that Rita might accept a job offer and move to San Diego. Awwwww! No need to worry, Chris! Rita would never leave you!

Thursday, I watched Episode #38. After a murder turned out to be connected to a shady modeling company (which was actually a front for a trafficking scheme), Chris and Rita went undercover! Chris pretended to be a mobster! Rita pretended to be a model! Any episode in which Chris and Rita go undercover is guaranteed to be a gem, especially if it requires Chris to wear a red suit and talk tough. This was followed by an episode in which Chris and Rita investigated a death at a birthday party and Rita dealt with some issues from her traumatic childhood. It was actually a pretty effective episode. As silly as the mysteries on the show were, both Mitzi Kapture and Rob Estes were good actors who managed to find a sort of emotional reality amongst all the neon and lingerie.

Finally, on Friday, I watched Episode #40, “Soul Kiss.” Chris and Rita investigated what appeared to be a suicide but what was actually a murder that was connected to a tantric sex seminar. Rita was intrigued but Chris thought it was silly to suggest that he needed a seminar to learn anything new. Rob Estes and Mitzi Kapture both kind of laughed their way through this episode.

Snowpiercer (Sunday Night, TNT)

I watched Snowpiercer while waiting for the second showing of the SAG Awards to begin. Visually, it’s an impressive show and there’s a lot of actors in the cast who I like. And I also liked the movie upon which the show is based. That said, I don’t have the slightest idea what was going on in the majority of the episode.

South Park (Wednesday Night, Comedy Central)

This week, South Park not only took on Russian aggression but it also took a look at the way adults specialize in scaring and emotionally traumatizing children “for their own good.” As usually happens in a time of crisis, South Park was the only show to come across as being the least bit sensible. The new episode was followed by the “Zipline” episode from 2012. That episode was only ten years old but seemed to come from a totally different universe.

The State of the Union (Hulu)

I skipped the State of the Union address on Tuesday and I wasn’t planning on watching it at all but then I heard from several people about how weird it was so I decided to give it a watch. And yes, it was very, very weird. All of our leaders are very, very weird and there’s no point in pretending otherwise. What’s the deal with Biden’s creepy whispering thing? Can no one tell him not to do that? For that matter, most of the members of Congress appear to be deeply weird as well. As much as we Americans love watching British and Canadian lawmakers heckle their prime ministers, we’re still not used to the idea of people in Congress doing it to the president. At times, I felt like I was watching a sci-fi film in which society had moved underground.

My main impression is that this country is led by a group of very old people. Maybe we should try electing some younger people the next time we have the opportunity. Just a thought.

Talking Dead (Sunday Night, AMC)

Just like last week, Talking Dead did not feature a studio audience and, as a result, it fell somewhat flat.

The Walking Dead (Sunday Night, AMC)

I like the Commonwealth. Their Halloween looked fun and I don’t really care about the income inequality. The world’s ending. Let people enjoy themselves, Carol. I reviewed the latest episode of The Walking Dead here.

Worst Roommate Ever (Netflix)

Netflx’s latest true crime series tells the story of four terrible roommates. Three of them turned out to be murderers. The other one attempted to kill two people that we know about and the fact that both of them survived is something of a miracle. I binged this frequently fascinating but often disturbing series on Tuesday morning, before Erin and I left to the vote in the Texas primaries. The fact that this series is only five episodes long and doesn’t resort to dragging out any of the stories that it tells should really serve as a lesson for some other showrunners out there. That said, I also have to say that the final two episodes, which dealt with the nightmarish crimes of Jamison Branch, left me feeling deeply unsettled and there’s a part of me that wishes that I hadn’t watched them.

TV Review: The Dropout Episodes 1, 2, and 3 (dir by Michael Showalter)

Posted on March 5, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

On Thursday, I binged the first three episodes of Hulu’s The Dropout.

The Dropout is Hulu’s miniseries about the rise and fall of Elizabeth Holmes (played by Amanda Seyfried), the enigmatic Stanford dropout who founded Theranos and became a billionaire before she turned 30. She promised that Theranos would revolutionize both the way that blood was tested and the world of health care in general. She was known for black turtlenecks, her deep (and possibly fake) voice, and her habit of not blinking. Of course, as common sense should have made obvious to just about anyone, it turned out that Elizabeth Holmes was lying about the blood testing machinery that her company was marketing. She and her business partner and former lover, Sunny Balwani (played, in The Dropout, by Lost‘s Naveen Andrews) were eventually charged with defrauding their investors. At trial, Holmes argues that her intentions were good and that she was trapped in an abusive relationship with Balwani. While Balwani’s trial is scheduled to being later this month, Elizabeth had already been convicted and currently await sentencing. Theranos, of course, no longer exists.

After the first three episodes, I would say that I’m cautiously optimistic. Seyfried and Andrews seem to be perfectly cast as Elizabeth and Sunny and the story itself is an interesting one. The miniseries format seems like a good one for director Michael Showalter’s trademark mix of dark comedy and drama. Much as with Showalter’s The Eyes of Tammy Faye, there were a few moments that felt a bit too cartoonish, most of which involved William H. Macy as Elizabeth’s former neighbor and eventual business rival but, for the most part, the first three episodes managed to establish and maintain a consistent tone. Before she lowers her voice and dons her black turtleneck, Elizabeth comes across as being socially awkward but likable. It’s only towards the end of the 3rd episode that we really start to see her as being the villainous figure that she eventually began. The first 3 episodes are like an origin story.

Of course, the fact that it took 3 hours to tell her origin story is one reason why I’m cautious in my optimism. Streaming services are currently full of miniseries that all take stories that should be interesting but then drag them out to such a length that it’s hard not to eventually lose interest. (If you need an example of what I’m talking about, go check out Netflix’s Inventing Anna.) The Dropout‘s first three episodes were well-done but it’s still hard not to feel that the story told in those three hours could have just as easily been told in 20 minutes, without denying the viewer anything that they needed to know to understand Elizabeth and Sunny. There are five more episodes to go. Can the story of Elizabeth Holmes and Theranos remain interesting for 8 hours? I’m hopeful but I’m not totally sure.

With all that in mind, I’m recommending The Dropout, on the basis of the first three episodes. But remember …. I was originally pretty enthusiastic about Pam & Tommy as well.

The TSL’s Grindhouse: The Scary on Sixty-First (dir by Dasha Nekrasova)

Posted on March 4, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Now streaming on Shudder, The Scary of Sixty-First is a weird little movie.

Two friends who don’t really seem to like each other that much, Noelle (Madeline Quinn) and Addie (Betsey Brown), move into a fully furnished Manhattan apartment. The apartment, they are told, has been uninhabited for a few years. The realtor asks them not to play the piano. One of the mattresses is stained with blood. Hidden amongst the surprisingly ornate furniture are mystical books and mysterious cards. It’s kind of a creepy place but it’s also in Manhattan and it’s affordable.

Addie, we’re told, has a history of mental instability and a difficult relationship with her family. (Noelle, at one point, refers to Addie’s father as being a pedophile.) Addie also has an idiot boyfriend named Gary (Mark Rapaport, who also produced the film). Gary may be a little bit slow but he has his standards and when Addie starts to speak in a strange voice and ask him to take part in some truly perverse role play, he freaks out.

Meanwhile, Noelle meets a mysterious person who is only referred to as being The Girl (played by the film’s director, Dasha Nekrasova). The Girl is hooked on speed and conspiracy theories. The Girl explains that Noelle and Addie’s apartment was once used by Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell. The Girl says that she’s investigating their crimes but her investigation mostly seems to consist of watching YouTube videos and walking around New York. Within hours of meeting each other, Noelle and the Girl are lovers but when The Girl tries to demonstrate why Epstein couldn’t possibly have hanged himself, Noelle appears to deliberately hesitate before saving the Girl’s life. Later, as they walk around New York, the Girl spots a woman who she claims is Ghislaine Maxwell.

As for Addie, she’s having nightmares and when she’s not dreaming, she’s sleepwalking and doing even more. She’s also becoming obsessed with the British Royal Family. She’s especially interested in Prince Andrew….

“Epstein didn’t kill himself,” as the saying goes and one reason why people are still saying that years after Jeffrey Epstein’s death is because it’s obvious that, whether he killed himself or not, he still took a lot of secrets with him to the grave. I’m a student of conspiracy theories but I wouldn’t call myself a believer. I tend to assume that most of what happens in the world is due to random fate as opposed to the unseen hand of some secret organization. That said, I totally accept that there’s a very good chance that Jeffrey Epstein was murdered on the orders of the rich and powerful people who he previously flew to his private island. One reason why The Scary of Sixty-First works is because, as bizarre as the film gets, it’s still dealing with a conspiracy theory that even most skeptics find to be plausible.

And indeed, it’s a bizarre film, one that plays out like a filmed dream. Little about the film makes sense and, at the end of it, you’re still left with a lot of unanswered questions but then again, that’s a feeling that will be familiar to anyone who has ever gone down a conspiracy rabbit hole. Are Noelle and Addie truly being possessed by evil auras of Epstein and Maxwell or are they just allowing their own paranoia to drive them mad? Much like a dream, the answers are there but they’re hidden. It’s a film that many people will find to be distasteful but, at its best, it captures the speed-fueled logic of the modern conspiracy theorist. It’s a jolt of psychosis captured on a film. The apartment becomes a metaphor for both the sins of the past and the uncertainty of the present.

Understandably, many will find the film to be distasteful and it often is. But, at the same time, The Scary on Sixty-First captures the atmosphere and the paranoia of our current cultural moment. After all, Epstein didn’t kill himself.

Music Video of the Day: Redlight by Swedish House Mafia and Sting (2022, dir by ????)

Posted on March 4, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Before clicking on play, please be aware that this video features flashing lights and comes with an epilepsy warning. If you watch, enjoy!

You don’t have to put on the red light,
Those days over
You don’t have to sell your body to the night
You don’t have to wear that dress to night
Those days are over
You don’t have to put on the Redlight
Those days are over
You don’t have to put on the Redlight
Those days are over
You don’t have to put on the Redlight
Those days are over
You don’t have to put on the Redlight
Those days are over
You don’t have to put on the Redlight
Those days are over
You don’t have to put on the Redlight

Film Review: The Weekend Away (dir by Kim Farrant)

Posted on March 3, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

“First time in Croatia?” asks handsome taxi driver Zain (Ziad Bakri).

As soon as Beth (Leighton Meester) answers in the affirmative, we know that she’s in trouble. If you’ve seen enough thrillers, you know that any trip to another country is going to lead to trouble. Beth may think that she’s just going to be spending a week or two with her wild best friend, Kate (Christina Wolfe), but we know that something bad is going to down. And the minute that Kate insists that Beth dress up and go to a club with her, we know that someone is going to end up missing.

The next morning, Beth wakes up with a hangover, a cluttered villa, and an absent best friend. Where is Kate? Kate and Beth were supposed to go on bicycle tour but now, Kate is nowhere to be found! More than one person suggests that maybe she didn’t want to do the whole cycling thing. I don’t blame her. You go, Kate! Don’t let your friend guilt you into doing something that lame!

However, Beth starts to have flashbacks to the night at the bar. It turns out that Beth is almost as much of a lightweight as I am when it comes to drinking because a glass of wine has totally wrecked her memory. When Kate’s landlord mentions that Kate brought two men back to the villa with them, Beth starts to think that something terrible has happened to Kate! The police soon agree with her but they think that Beth is the culprit!

Teaming up with Zain, Beth starts to investigate on her own. Her husband (Luke Norris) is not happy to learn that, while he’s in London with their baby, his wife is running around Croatia with a sensitive and widowed taxi driver, Needless to say, it soon turns out that just about everyone involved has a secret that they’re trying to hide.

The Weekend Away is the latest Netflix original thriller. It starts out on a good note, with Kate and Beth catching up on their lives in Croatia. Leighton Meester and Christina Wolfe are convincing as old friends who have followed different life paths and Croatia itself looks both inviting and ominous at the same time. Unfortunately, once Kate disappears, the film gets a bit uneven and some of the characters do some things that don’t really make sense and the actors themselves sometimes seem to be struggling to find a way to make their dialogue sound credible. The film starts with a lot of promise but the mystery itself turn out to not be as interesting as one might hope. That’s my long-winded way of saying that you’ll figure out what happened long before anyone else in the film does.

Again, it’s an uneven film but I do like to focus on the positive so I will say that the film was nice to look at. The scenes in the club were well-directed and captured both the chaos and the fun of discovering an exciting city for the first time. Leighton Meester and Christina Wolfe were convincing as friends and Luke Norris kept you guessing as Beth’s husband. It’s the Netflix equivalent of fast food. It’s the type of film that you enjoy for what it is and then you forget about it a few hours later.

Music Video of the Day: King of a Tragedy by Isak Danielson (2022, dir by Kalle Möller)

Posted on March 3, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This is an enjoyably atmospheric music video. It makes me want to read a paperback epic about intrigue in a royal court.

Enjoy!

I wanna burn in the fire below
I wanna dance with the devil you know
take me to heaven and don’t let me go
I am the king of a tragedy

Waking up to hear the siren
you’re the poison in my blood
I could do without the violence
god knows I’m not that tough

I keep loosing all my virtues ’
i’m a magnet to your pain
Waking up to hear the siren

I wanna burn in the fire below
I wanna dance with the devil you know
take me to heaven and don’t let me go
I am the king of a tragedy
king of a tragedy

I wanna surrender and sacrifice
the fear that I feel when I look in your eyes
Please take me to heaven before I die
I am the king of a tragedy
king of a tragedy

Every word you say is fragile
It’s like a walk on broken glass
I’m like a deer, so scared of your headlights
you got your right foot hard on the gas
can we stay right here forever
you make it hard to run away
Every word you say is fragile

I wanna burn in the fire below
I wanna dance with the devil you know
Take me to heaven and don’t let me go
I am the king of a tragedy
king of a tragedy

I wanna surrender and sacrifice
the fear that I feel when I look in your eyes
Please take me to heaven before I die
I am the king of a tragedy
king of a tragedy

ooohh I wanna see what it feels like
to run into your headlights
oooh you know me I’m craving the spotlight

I wanna burn in the fire below
I wanna dance with the devil you know
Take me to heaven and don’t let me go
I am the king of a tragedy
king of a tragedy

I wanna surrender and sacrifice
the fear that I feel when I look in your eyes
Please take me to heaven before I die
I am the king of a tragedy
king of a tragedy

TV Review: Pam & Tommy “Destroyer of Worlds” (dir by Lake Bell)

Posted on March 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

After two blissfully Rand-free episodes of Pam & Tommy, Rand Gauthier (Seth Rogen) returned to dominate this week’s episode. As soon as things opened with a close-up of Rand looking like someone had just run over his favorite pet, I groaned very loudly. Rand is such an unlikable character and the show insists on trying to make us feel sorry for this loser. Even if Seth Rogen wasn’t both miscast and intent on giving the worst performance of his career in the role, Rand would make Pam & Tommy difficult to watch.

Rand (or Reed or whatever his name is supposed to be) was basically upset because he wasn’t making any money off of the Pam and Tommy sex tape. Instead, the bootleggers were making all the money. Rand/Reed also got upset because cocaine addict Uncle Miltie (Nick Offerman) turned out to be a bad business partner. Meanwhile, Butchie (Andrew “Dice” Clay, acting up a storm with little to show for it) wanted his money and demanded that Reed/Rand turn into a debt collector. “I AM THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS!” a frustrated Rand declared as he collected a debt and seriously, what the heck? (Folks, I gave up cursing for Lent. Just go with me here.) The episode’s best moment was when Rand tried to blackmail Tommy and Tommy reacted by setting the money on fire while Randy Reed watched. What made this scene so great was that Tommy called Reedy Rand a loser. Again, I got the feeling that we were supposed to feel bad for Rand but …. eh. Who cares? Rand is a loser and the mullet isn’t making him look any better.

If the highlight of the episode was Tommy setting that money on fire while taunting Rand, the show’s second best moment was Pam appearing on The Tonight Show and having to deal with a series of disrespectful and infuriatingly sexist questions from Jay Leno. The actor playing Leno essentially played him as being the devil, which was kind of amusing. Watching the scenes with Leno acting like a member of the Spanish Inquisition, I found myself thinking about how Ken Russell probably could have done something amazing with this material. The scene ended with Pam having to talk Tommy out of beating up Jay Leno, which again was kind of amusing. Just imagine if Tommy had stormed onto the Tonight Show set and thrown a punch while Jay was introducing Hugh Grant. That would have been classic television.

As the Tonight Show debacle indicated, the release of Barb Wire was overshadowed by Pam and Tommy’s court case against Penthouse. The judge ruled that the 1st Amendment gave Penthouse the right to publish still from the tape. Tommy was too stupid to realize that the judge had ruled against him. Pam responded with a monologue about how the judge was actually saying that it was okay to exploit her because she wore a swimsuit on Baywatch and she also previously appeared in Playboy. Pam had a point but, as so often happens on this show, that point was somewhat negated by the fact that the real-life Pamela Anderson never signed off on having her life dramatized in Pam & Tommy and, as a result, the show is itself a bit exploitive.

The show also continues to feel a bit pointless, despite Lily James’s frequently excellent performance as Pam. Again, it’s hard not to wonder why exactly this story demands the limited series treatment as opposed to the 90-minute movie treatment. Indeed, by stretching thing out over 8 hours, Pam & Tommy just reminds us of how superficial this story really is.

One final note: early on in the episode, Butchie is shocked to discover that there’s a new coffee company in Seattle that’s called Starbucks. I’ve noticed this is a joke that’s popped up in a lot of movies about the 90s and it feels rather lazy. They should have made an AOL joke instead.

Music Video of the Day: Lost Track by HAIM (2022, dir by Paul Thomas Anderson)

Posted on March 2, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

At some point, in the future, it will be realized that Paul Thomas Anderson’s Haim videos constitute some of the best short films of the decade. It’s the perfect collaboration between a group of artists. This is their latest and video and you better enjoy!

[Verse 1]
Tryin’ to get on top
But it’s never easy
Mastered my own luck
But it wasn’t easy
I’m tryin’ to feel alright
Around all these people
I try, but I’m just numb
This time

[Chorus]
Deepest cut that I can’t feel
Found a grip on the steering wheel
I know a piece’s stuck
You can sit down if you don’t mind me standin’ up (Mind me standin’ up)
I know I was too good to pass (Too good to pass)
So me and you caused a chain reaction (Chain reaction)
I’ll take the smallest crumb
But I’ll never get back what I lost track of

[Verse 2]
Laugh when I’m still cryin’
Yeah, you know the deal
Burn but it’s still fine (Huh)
Yeah, you know the deal
Can’t redeem my love
That’s such a steal
But you can’t say I’m not tryin’
This time

[Outro]
I’ll never get back what I lost track
I’ll never get back what I lost track
I’ll never get back what I lost track
I’ll never get back but I’ve lost track

TV Review: The Walking Dead 11.10 “New Haunts” (dir by Jon Amiel)

Posted on February 28, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Wow, life sure is fun as a member of The Commonwealth!

I just hope those Alexandrians don’t screw everything up!

Actually, we already know that life is not as perfect in The Commonwealth as the community’s leaders claim. And we know that eventually, there will be a conflict between the Alexandrians and The Commonwealth, with Daryl apparently on the side of The Commonwealth. We know all of that but, at the same time, it’s hard not to be impressed by the effort the Commonwealth put into giving everyone a happy Halloween.

Costumes? You bet.

Haunted houses full of real walkers? Okay, that seems hella dangerous but then again, it’s still better than anything Rick ever did for Halloween.

A masquerade ball? Oh Hell yes!

The Commonwealth understand that importance of tradition as a way to tie a community together. By putting on a traditional holiday, the Commonwealth allows its citizens to feel as if everything can somehow be normal once again. There’s something to be said for that. When the whole world is collapsing around you, it’s important to have some sliver of normalcy to hang onto. That’s one thing that I don’t think Rick Grimes every truly understood and I’m not sure that Maggie gets it either. It is, however, something that I think that Daryl understands.

Daryl obviously enjoyed Halloween with the Commonwealth. He also enjoyed training with Mercer, even if he did disagree with some of Mercer’s decisions. Mercer and Daryl are kindred souls and watching the two of them together, one could see how Daryl could potentially be drawn to choose the Commonwealth over the Alexandrians. At the same time, Mercer’s attempts to keep Daryl and Rosita separated showed that Mercer understood that the best way to win Daryl’s loyalty was to isolate him. In many ways, Daryl is still looking for a replacement for Merle and Mercer seems to fit the bill.

Meanwhile, Carol discovered that Elijah is closer to death than he’s admitted and that he probably won’t live long enough to receive the operation that he’s been promised. Whether or not Carol is going to keep that a secret is an open question. I have a hard time imagining that Carol won’t tell Elijah. Knowing Carol, there’s always a chance she might take every doctor in the Commonwealth hostage and kill one every hour until they operate on Elijah. I could see the idea forming in Carol’s head as the Commonwealth doctor explained to her that Elijah was too far down on the list. I imagine that, at some point, Carol will discover that the Commonwealth leaders get preferential treatment under the Commonwealth medical system and that will probably drive her over the edge. That’s just my prediction.

There is definitely a caste system in the Commonwealth and, as we discovered at the Masquerade Ball, not all of the citizens of The Commonwealth are as happy as they initially seem. Then again, the same can be said of every community that’s sprung up in the world of The Walking Dead and that includes the Alexandrians. If anything, the collapse of society has made the world even more hierarchal than it was before. In many ways, of course, humanity continues to be in denial, even during the apocalypse. Regardless of class, wealth, or power, everyone’s story reaches the same ending. Everyone dies and everyone ends up as one of the Walking Dead.

Anyway, New Haunts was a nicely-done episode that allowed us a chance to see a bit more of life in the Commonwealth. Right now, it looks like a nice way to live but I’m sure that will change over the upcoming few weeks.

Happy Halloween!