Song of the Day: GWAR – The One That Will Not Be Named


In the past, I have always taken the opportunity on Halloween to feature some song or compilation respectful towards the pagan roots of the holiday. Halloween is, after all, a celebration of all those things traditionally taboo in a society which derives its moral perspective from Christianity.

Not this year. In honor of the late, great Dave Brockie, who passed away earlier this year, I offer you the grand finale of the most epic B-side horror-comedy album in the history of heavy metal. On Beyond Hell, GWAR are forced to retreat underground when their fortress in Antarctica is nuked and overrun by a global military task force (“War is All We Know”). They happen to stumble their way into Hell, and decide to spend their time in exile overthrowing Satan and claiming his armies to reconquer Earth. “The One That Will Not Be Named” is their final confrontation with Satan:

We’ve crossed creviced chasms vast,
And endless plains of unshaven ass.
Our time in Hell draws to the last!
We call upon the Master of the Pit:
“Have you got a toilet? I must take a shit!”
“Open your gates, Lord of Hate,”
“Or your front porch is gonna get it!”

“Very well, I’ll use my sword.”
“It’s very good as smashing doors.”
“We call you out!”
“Overrated Overlord!”

The root of all evil and hatred and shame,
So many victims, so many names,
But they are all the same.
“Ereshkigal!”
“Charun!”
“Helel ben-Shachar!”
“Lucifer! Satan! We know who you are!”

He is the one who will not be named
He is the one who will not be blamed

The realm of the sun we have left far behind,
And damned in the darkness we’ve groped with the blind.
Cannot remember time.
“We summon the Lord of Hell”
“So come forth now! I have your smell!”
“Cologne?! Cheap shit, and lots of it!”

He is the one who will not be named
He is the one who will not be blamed
He is the one that is turning the screws
The Lord of the Underworld. Let’s give the Devil his due!

(Lucifer): Welcome, GWAR, to my domain.
It’s nice to be called on by so many names.
What’s this I hear about you kicking my ass?

(In the live show, this is where Oderus fights a guy in an eight or nine foot tall Satan costume and chops his head off, drenching the audience in fake blood.)

He is the one who will not be named
He is the one who will not be blamed
He is the one that is turning the screws
The Lord of the Underworld. Let’s give the Devil his due!

We crossed chasms vast…
and endless ass…
Our time in Hell draws to the last.
The Legions of Hell lay broken and shorn.
The brothers of GWAR have slain through the storm.
The gate, it is riven. The Master is slain.
The fortress of GWAR is now ripe to reclaim.

We wasted Hell in the name of GWAR!
Though we really don’t know where we are…..

Happy Halloween everyone!

Horror on The Lens: Night of the Living Dead (dir by George Romero)


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Happy Halloween!

Here at the Shattered Lens, we’re all about tradition!  And what could be a better tradition than watching Night of the Living Dead on Halloween?

Watch it below and enjoy!  And then, after you’ve watched it, be sure to read Arleigh’s excellent review!

Special Bonus Horror On TV: Baywatch Nights 2.9 “Night Whispers”


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Remember how, in the last episode of Baywatch Nights that we shared, David Hasselhoff was possessed by a demon?  Well, in this special bonus edition of Horror on TV, he’s menaced by a vampire.  And it’s just as silly as you would probably expect…

Enjoy!

 

Horror on TV: The Twilight Zone 2.6 “Eye of the Beholder”


 

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First broadcast on November 11th, 1960, Eye of the Beholder is one of the best known and most acclaimed episodes of The Twilight Zone. Telling the story of a bandaged patient and the shadowy doctors who continually talk about how the patient’s upcoming surgery will be her final chance, this is one of those universal episodes that is probably more relevant today than when it was first broadcast.

6 Scary Trailers For Halloween


Welcome to the latest Halloween edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Film trailers!  The Trailer Kitties swear that these trailers are scary!  Let’s see if they’re correct.

1) The Vampire and the Ballerina (1960)

Sorry, this one isn’t really that scary but it does feature a lot of dancing, so I like it.

2) Mary,Mary,  Bloody Mary (1975)

3) Corruption (1968)

Oh no!  Not Peter Cushing!

4) I Drink Your Blood/I Eat Your Skin (1970)

5) The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

6) The Flesh and Blood Show (1972)

Those weren’t very scary, Trailer Kitty!

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Horror on TV: Twilight Zone 2.26 “Shadow Play”


 

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This is one of my favorite episodes of The Twilight Zone! In Shadow Play, a man (Dennis Weaver) is curiously unconcerned about being on death row. According to him, it’s all just a recurring dream and everyone around him — the other prisoners, the District Attorney, the judge, the jury, and everyone else — is just a part of his dream. As the other characters start to realize that Weaver could be telling the truth, they’re forced to consider what will happen when he either wakes up or starts the dream over…

I love this one. It’s just a lot of fun and not quite as heavy-handed as some of The Twilight Zone‘s other attempts at social commentary.

This was originally broadcast on May 5th, 1961. It was directed by John Brahm and written by Charles Beaumont.

6 Mummified Trailers For Halloween


For our latest Halloween edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers, the Trailer Kitties have gone digging and have braved many ancient curses and broken a few international laws!  Let’s see what they’ve brought back to us.

1) The Mummy (1932)

2) The Mummy’s Hand (1940)

3) The Mummy’s Tomb (1942)

4) The Mummy’s Ghost (1944)

5) The Mummy’s Curse (1944)

6) Curse of the Mummy’s Tomb (1964)

What do you think, Trailer Kitty?

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The Daily Horror Grindhouse: Zombi 2 (dir by Lucio Fulci)


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(After reading my review, please be sure to check out Arleigh’s thoughts on Zombi 2!)

Two questions:

1) Do you love Zombie movies?

2) Have you seen Lucio Fulci’s 1979 film Zombi 2?

If your answer to the first question was yes, then you should definitely have had the same answer for the second.  Along with launching the long and extremely influential genre of the Italian zombie film and being one of the best zombie films ever made, Zombi 2 is also one of the best horror films ever made.

First off, a few words about that title.  Zombi was the Italian title for George Romero’s Dawn of the Dead.  Zombi was a huge hit on Italy and, in that shameless way that is beloved by all Italian horror fans, producers Fabrizio De Angelis and Ugo Tucci decided to take advantage of Zombi‘s success by naming their upcoming zombie film Zombi 2.  And, while I have always liked to think of Zombi 2 as being a prequel to Romero’s Dead trilogy, Zombi 2 is actually in no way related to Dawn of the Dead.

It has often been assumed that Zombi 2 was directly inspired by Dawn of the Dead.  While Romero’s film certainly provided more of an influence than just providing a title, Zombi 2 was actually in production before Dawn of the Dead opened in Italy.  And, ultimately, Zombi 2 is a far different film from Romero’s film.  Eschewing the social commentary and satire that ran through Dawn of the Dead, Zombi 2 is instead a work of pure horror.  They’re both excellent films but Dawn of the Dead ultimately inspires debate while Zombi 2 inspires nightmares.

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Opening with a previously dead body being shot in the head as it slowly sits up on a stretcher and ending with a haunting vision of apocalypse, Zombi 2 is coated in a palpable atmosphere of doom.  A boat floats into a New York harbor and the two cops who investigate are greeted by a lumbering and hungry corpse.  Tisa Farrow plays the daughter of the boat’s owner.  When she and a reporter (Ian McCulloch, giving a likable and bemused performance that often finds him playing straight man to a bunch of decaying corpses and which provides a nice run up for his openly subversive performance in Zombie Holocaust) team up to find her father, their investigation leads them to an isolated island where the haunted and alcoholic Dr. Menard (Richard Johnson, bringing so much gravity and self-loathing to his role that he literally elevates the entire film) is struggling to deal with an outbreak of zombies.  Along with a boat captain (Al Cliver) and his girlfriend (Auretta Gay), McCulloch and Farrow try to escape the island before they end up joining the ranks of the undead…

As a director, Lucio Fulci was known for bringing his own unique visual flair to the horror genre.  Fulci, perhaps more than any of the other great Italian horror directors working during the Italian horror boom of the 80s and 90s, literally brought nightmares to cinematic life.  As a result, Zombi 2 is probably one of the most visually memorable zombie films ever made.  From the minute that McCulloch, Farrow, Cliver, and Gay arrive on the island, you can literally feel the oppressively hot wind and dusty wind that blows through every scene.  When the dead walk across the desolate landscape, Fulci emphasizes the decayed state of these zombies, forcing the audience to consider just how fragile the human body truly is.  The fact that the undead manage to be so pathetic and so dangerous at the same time only serves to make them all the more frightening.  When a group of conquistadors come back to life, Fulci films it from their point of view and, for a few minutes, we literally are one of the undead, clawing our way out of a grave.  Needless to say, Fulci doesn’t shy away from the gore of a zombie apocalypse either.  His zombies are ravenous and destructive.  The Walking Dead may be bloody but it’s got nothing on Zombi 2.

Along with the conquistador scene, Zombi 2 is especially remembered for two scenes, both of which showcase the best of both Fulci and Italian horror.

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One is the scene where Dr. Menard’s wife (Olga Karlatos) is menaced by zombies after taking a shower.  Even after she slams the bathroom door, a zombies hand breaks through the door and grabs her by the hair and starts to pull her through the jagged hole in the door.  As she is slowly pulled to her doom, her eyeball is pierced by a splinter of wood.  It’s definitely an over-the-top moment, the type of thing that we expect from an Italian horror film.  But, as over-the-top as it may be, it’s also incredibly effective and terrifying.  It’s a scene that lets us know that there is no escape from our fate.  It’s a scene that reminds us that the zombies will always win because there is no way to lock out death.

(In fact, it’s such an iconic scene that almost all of Fulci’s subsequent films would feature a character losing an eye.  Adding a certain poignancy to his trademark scenes of ocular destruction was the fact that Fulci, himself, was diabetic and reportedly often feared that he would lose his eyesight.)

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The other is a scene that always seems to bring a smile to the face of anyone who see it.  That’s the scene where a zombie gets into a fight with a shark while Auretta Gay swims nearby.  Again, it’s a bit ludicrous but it’s also incredibly effective.  If nothing else, it invites us to wonder how — if a shark can’t beat a zombie — can there be any hope for humanity?

The answer, of course, is that there isn’t.  Ultimately, in the world of Fulci’s film, whether by causes natural or unnatural, we’re all destined to become one of the zombies.

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(This review is cross-posted over at Fourth-Day Universe where all of October has been Zombie Month!)

 

Horror on TV: Night Gallery 3.10 “She’ll Be Company For You”


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In this episode of The Night Gallery, Leonard Nimoy plays a widower who is happy to be rid of his invalid wife. However, he then gets a cat who doesn’t seem to like him. And who can turn into a leopard and a tiger at will…


I just like this episode because it features a kitty!


6 Bloodsucking Trailers For Halloween


Here is today’s special Halloween edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Film Trailers!  For today’s edition, the Trailer Kitties took a special trip to old Transylvania.  Let’s see what they brought back!

1) Dracula (1931)

2) Dracula’s Daughter (1936)

3) Son of Dracula (1943)

4) House of Dracula (1945)

5) Horror of Dracula (1958)

6) Son of Dracula (1973)

What do you think, Trailer Kitty?

Bad trailer kitty!

Bad trailer kitty!