Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & 10 1.8 “The Sins of the Quarterback”

Posted on September 3, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, Bryce Smith finally takes the field!

Episode 1.8 “The Sins of the Quarterback”

(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on January 13th, 1985)

During a game against the — oh come on! — Atlanta Confederates, Bob Dorsey is sacked and knocked unconscious. Ultra-religious backup quarterback Bryce Smith (Jeff East) is sent in to replace him. Bryce throws an amazing pass across the entire field that is somewhat caught for a touchdown. The Bulls win!

The defensive players celebrate by grabbing Bryce forcing liquor down his throat. Bryce is a Mormon and a graduate of BYU. Bryce gets drunk easily. After the rest of the players leave the locker room, a barely coherent Bryce is approached by cheerleader Tammy Baker (Pamela Jean Bryant) who says that she is God’s gift to him. The scene ends rather abruptly, I assume because this episode was heavily edited for syndication.

A week later, an excited Tammy approaches Bryce at a roast honoring the team. She tells him that she’s pregnant! She’s super-excited! Bryce, however, is shaken and — after a fantasy sequence set in the Garden of Eden — Bryce announces that he is retiring from football and going to Tibet to become a monk. Why would a Mormon go to Tibet to become a monk?

Well, I guess the team is screwed! Bob Dorsey still isn’t ready to come back and the third-string quarterback can barely throw the ball. However, Bryce’s wife comes to the rescue. She forgives Bryce for cheating and she also invites Tammy to come live with them. Bryce can continue to play football!

Denardo, however, doubts that Bryce is the one who impregnated Tammy. He demands that every other player who had sex with Tammy raise their hand. Nearly every hand in the locker room goes up. Bryce worries that everyone is going to have to move in with him and his wife….

Okay, then! It’s hard to review this episode because, again, it’s obvious that the racy, original episode (the one that aired on HBO) was heavily edited for syndication. The version that I saw featured a lot of abrupt jump cuts. The story itself was fairly dumb but that’s kind of a given when it comes to this show. I’ll give some credit to Jeff East. He was far better than the material he had to work with.

Myself, I’m just amazed that this show featured a team called the Atlanta Confederates. I’m going to assume that team eventually changed their name.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 1.7 “Uneasy Lies The Head”

Posted on August 27, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Coach Denardo has a bad dream and put the future of the Bulls in jeopardy.

Episode 1.7 “Uneasy Lies The Head”

(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on January 6th, 1985)

After having a nightmare in which the members of the Bulls all appear as parts of his failing body and a demonic linebacker (Donald Gibb) and a saintly quarterback (Jeff East) tell him that he has to decide whether he wants to go to Heaven or Hell, Coach Denardo fears that his time is up.

At the next game, Denardo is distracted. He calls the last time out, not realizing that he doesn’t have any left. The clocks runs out while the Bulls are trying to get set up for field goal. “Time out! Time out!” Denardo yells. “You have no time left, coach,” the referee replies, which is maybe not the best way to speak to a man recovering from a heart attack. As for the game, it’s a humiliating loss. Denardo says that he might have to retire….

Yeah, that sounds about right. I don’t know much about football but I can tell that Denardo made a lot of mistakes in the course of just two minutes. Get that old man out there! Heck, just let Diane coach like she did last week….

Diane decides to trick Denardo into staying. She rolls a really old computer out during practice and lets it call the plays. Denardo gets angry. No machine is going to replace Ernie Denardo!

Meanwhile, Bubba (Prince Hughes) upsets his mother-in-law.

Seriously, that’s the entire episode. That’s all that happens. I know it doesn’t sound like much but what can I tell you? I sat through this and spent the whole time wondering when the episode’s actual story was going to start and it really didn’t. Denardo had a bad dream. Bubba upset his mother-in-law. That’s it.

This episode was forgettable. Diane should have fired Denardo after that loss. I fear the Bulls aren’t going to make it to whatever this show’s version of the Super Bowl is.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 2.10 “Cranked Up”

Posted on July 8, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, Chris nearly gets everyone killed …. again!

Episode 2.10 “Cranked Up”

(Dir by Corey Michael Eubanks, originally aired on November 3rd, 1996)

The bike cops are taking part in an “eco-relay,” (which I guess is a bicycle race) through the mountains surrounding Santa Monica. Upon arriving at the park, Chris and Corey spot two rednecks on ATVs.

“Those are illegal in state parks!” Chris says.

And you’re off-duty, Chris. Seriously, Chris is the most annoying character on this show and that’s kind of amazing when you consider the competition.

Anyway, during the race, Chris spots a meth lab that is being run by those ATV-riding rednecks. Even though she’s off-duty, doesn’t have a radio, and doesn’t have any way to bring in any backup, she still decides to take down the meth lab herself. Instead, she gets captured by the rednecks and their girlfriend, Mary Lou (Maddie Corman). Mary Lou lights a cigarette and Chris yells at her about it. I’m surprised that they didn’t just give Chris back after having to spend ten minutes with her.

The other bike cops go to search for Chris. Chris manages to escape on her own but, when she reaches the other bike cops, she explains that the meth lab could have “crank” out on the street by nightfall. The cops — who are ALL off-duty — decide to take down the lab without bothering to call for back-up. (Seriously, they could have just called the real police from the finish line.) The end result is that Cory gets shot (but, luckily, doesn’t die) and all the other cops get captured, including Chris for a second time. Luckily, Lt. Palermo shows up and rescues everyone. They don’t win the race but they do take out a meth lab. Of course, they could have easily won the race and then called the real cop to take out the meth lab afterwards and, as an extra bonus, Cory wouldn’t have gotten shot.

This was a Chris-centric episode, which means that the majority of the episode was divided between Chris bragging about being a badass and Chris complaining about situations that wouldn’t have happened if she wasn’t so freaking incompetent. This would have been a fun episode CHiPs but, with Pacific Blue, it’s just another reminder that bicyclists are worthless.

One final note: Maddie Corman is the wife of former actor and director Jace Alexander who, in 2015, was arrested for possession and distribution of child pornography. Corman did not divorce her husband but instead turned the experience of being married to pedophile into a one-woman off-Broadway play and even did a tour of all the morning shows promoting it. I don’t blame her for her husband’s crimes and I can totally buy her claim that she didn’t know anything about what was on his computer until the police showed up but, still, to then use those crimes to promote herself …. that’s always struck me as being more than a little icky.

A Movie A Day #246: Bloodsport (1988, directed by Newt Arnold)

Posted on September 11, 2017 by Jedadiah Leland

Bloodsport is one of Jean-Claude Van Damme’s earliest films and it is Damme good!

Forgive the terrible opening line but that is how they actually used to advertise Jean-Claude Van Damme films. Everything was either Damme exciting or Damme amazing or Damme spectacular. Though it was made by Cannon and had a much lower budget than the films Van Damme made during his 90s heyday, Bloodsport is still a Damme quintessential Van Damme movie.

Bloodsport claims that the story it tells is true. Frank Dux (Van Damme) is a U.S. Army captain who goes AWOL so he can compete in Kumite, an illegal martial arts tournament that is held in Hong Kong. Kumite is the only martial arts tournament where it is legal to kill your opponent. Chong Li (Bolo Yeung) became champion by killing anyone who lasts more than a minute with him. At first, no one believes that an American like Frank Dux has a chance of winning the Kumite. What they do not know is that Frank was trained by the legendary Senzo Tanaka. Frank is not just competing for personal glory. He is also competing in honor of Tanaka’s dead son.

Bloodsport is both Van Damme and Cannon Films at their best. Shot on location in Hong Kong, Bloodsport not only features Van Damme doing his thing but also gives him a memorable sidekick, Ray Jackson (Donald Gibb), who talks like a professional wrestler and gets all of the best lines. When Ray and Frank first meet, they bond over a video game that appears to be an extremely early version of Street Fighter. Also keep an eye out for Forest Whitaker (!), playing one of the CID officers who is assigned to track down Frank and arrest him for desertion.

Like any good Van Damme film, Bloodsport lives and dies on the strength of its fights and it does not skimp on the blood, the chokeholds, or the high kicks. Bolo Yeung is a great opponent for Van Damme but everyone know better than to try to beat Jean-Claude Van Damme. When it comes to fighting Van Damme, Duke put it best:

Lisa Goes Back To College: Jocks (dir by Steve Carver)

Posted on June 2, 2014 by Lisa Marie Bowman

A typically exciting scene from Jocks

Having already watched 3 campus protests from 1970, I decided that maybe I should watch something a little bit less heavy-handed for my next college film. But I knew that, in order to find a college film that would have nothing serious on its mind, I would have to find a film that was made after the 70s.

That’s what led to me getting out my Too Cool For School DVD boxset and watching Jocks, a “comedy” from 1987. As you can probably guess from the sarcastic use of quotation marks, I probably would have been better off staying in the 70s.

Christopher Lee (!) plays the President White, the strict president of L.A. College. President White is upset because the athletic department has failed to win a championship in over ten years so he gives Coach Bettlebom (played by veteran character actor R. G. Armstrong) an ultimatum: win a championship or lose his job. Bettlebom argues that the rest of the athletic department would be able to win if it wasn’t for the financial obligation of supporting the school’s tennis team. Bettlebom then tells tennis Coach Williams (played by Shaft himself, Richard Roundtree) that he’s canceling the tennis program and all of the tennis players are going to lose their scholarships. Williams responds by making a bet. If the tennis team wins the national championship, the tennis program will continue. And if they don’t, the team will cease to exist, Williams will be out of a job, and the members of the tennis team will all be forced to drop out of college and have their lives totally ruined…

Wait a minute.

That makes absolutely no sense.

What the Hell is Coach Williams thinking!?

That’s the sort of thinking that leads students to protest and occupy buildings and basically act like they’re extras in Getting Straight, Zabriskie Point, and R.P.M.

But anyway, let’s just move on and not worry about things like logic and narrative sense. It’s time to meet the tennis team!

There’s Tex (Adam Mills), who doesn’t have a Texas accent. Tex doesn’t really do much but he’s certainly in a lot of scenes.

There’s Andy (Stoney Jackson), the flamboyant black guy who freaks out his opponents by pretending to be gay, because this film was made in the 20th Century.

There’s Chito (Trinidad Silva), who speaks Spanish and dramatically crosses himself before playing each set.

There’s Ripper (Donald Gibb), who has a thick beard, growls a lot, and appears to be in his 40s.

There’s Jeff (Perry Lang), the nice guy. In a film full of unlikable characters, Jeff seems to be, at the very least, a decent guy. Plus, he has a fairly funny drunk scene and, when you’re watching a film like Jocks, you come to appreciate fairly funny.

And then there’s The Kid (Scott Strader), who apparently doesn’t have a name. Seriously, even President White calls him “The Kid.” As you might guess about someone with a permanent nickname, The Kid is a master tennis player.

Anyway, the team goes to the championships in Las Vegas where they engage in the usual drunken hijinks and basically act like a bunch of jerks. They also play some rather boring tennis games. The Kid falls for a tennis groupie played by future Law & Order: SVU star Mariska Hargitay. Eventually, it all comes down to whether or not the team can beat Dallas Tech and, as a proud Texas girl, I’m not ashamed to admit that I was saying, “Go Dallas!” the entire time.

So, is Jocks worth watching?

If you’re a Christopher Lee fan, maybe. But, honestly, I think Sir Christopher would forgive you if you skipped this one.

But if you really want to, check out Jocks below!