Retro Television Review: The Glass House (dir by Tom Gries)

Posted on June 9, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay. Today’s film is 1972’s The Glass House! It can be viewed on YouTube.

The Glass House starts with three men arriving at a location that will define the next few months of their lives.

Brian Courtland (Clu Gulager) is a veteran of the Vietnam War. He spent part of his service working as a guard in the brig. Now that he’s back in the United States and in need of a regular paycheck, he has gotten a job working as a prison guard. Courtland is not naive about where he’s going to be working or who he is going to be working with. But he is an idealist, one who tries to treat everyone fairly and who hopes that he will be able to do some sort of good in his new position.

Alan (Kristoffer Tabori) is a young man who has been arrested for selling marijuana. He is quiet and just hoping to serve his time and then get on with his life. His fellow prisoners have different plans for him.

Finally, Jonathan Paige (Alan Alda) is a liberal professor who, in a moment of rage, accidentally killed a man in a fight. Convicted of manslaughter, Paige enters the prison in a daze and cannot stop flashing back to the one moment that changed his life forever. Paige is assigned to work in the pharmacy, where he meets a prisoner-turned-activist named Lennox (Billy Dee Williams). Paige struggles to retain his humanity despite the harsh conditions.

All three of the men find themselves having to deal with the attentions of Hugo Slocum (Vic Morrow), the predatory “king” of the prison. Slocum expects Paige to help him run drugs though the the pharmacy. Slocum preys on Alan and sends his gang to punish him when Alan refuses Slocum’s advances. And Slocum expects that Courtland will just be another corrupt guard who agrees to look the other way when it comes to Slocum’s activities. Courtland, however, turns out to have more integrity than anyone was expecting.

The Glass House opens with a title card, informing the viewer that the film was shot at an actual prison and that the majority of the people in the film were actual prisoners. Not surprisingly, The Glass House does feel authentic in a way that a lot of other films about incarceration does not. The prison is claustrophobic and dirty, with every crack in the wall reminding the prisoners and the viewer that no one cares about what happens there. The extras have the blank look of men who understand that showing any emotion will be taken a sign of a weakness. Made in 1972, at a time when America was still struggling to integrate, The Glass House takes place in an almost totally segregated world. The black prisoners stick together. The white prisoners stick together. Everyone understands that’s the way that it will always be and, as we see by the end of the film, that’s the way the guards and the warden (Dean Jagger) prefer it because that means almost any incident can be written off as a being “a race riot.”

The real actors amongst the population do a good job of blending into the surroundings. Alda, Williams, and Tabori all give good performance while Vic Morrow is truly menacing in the role of the vicious Slocum. Slocum may not be particularly bright but, because he has no conscience, he is uniquely suited to thrive in a world with no morality. The film’s best performance comes from Clu Gulager, who does a great job of portraying Courtland’s growing disgust with how the system works.

Though it’s over 50 years old, The Glass House is a still a powerful look at life on the fringes. Society, for the most part, doesn’t really care much about what happens to the incarcerated. This film makes a strong case that we probably should. One is left with little doubt that, even if relatively harmless prisoners like Paige and Campbell survive being locked up with men like Slocum, they’ll still be incapable of returning to the “real world” afterwards. The viewer, like Brian Courtland, is left to wonder how much corruption can be tolerated before enough is enough.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 6/2/24 — 6/8/24

Posted on June 8, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Ugh. We got our power back on Sunday but this week still kind of sucked for me. I’ve just been in a funk, as you can probably tell by how little I’ve posted over the past few days. Going a week without power really threw me off of my rhythm. Even with the return of the lights, there’s been a lot of cleaning up to do, around both the house and the neighborhood. For that reason, I’ve put a lot of my regular posts on a temporary hiatus. My regular Retro Television Reviews, for instance, will return on June 17th.

So, I guess my point is — don’t give up on me! I’m in a funk right now but it happens and I’ll snap out of it, definitely sooner than later.

As far what I watched on television this week:

Degrassi: The Next Generation (Pluto TV)

I’ve watched only one show this week but I also watched 14 seasons of it. It takes a total of 7 and a half days to binge the entirety of Degrassi: The Next Generation. When the lights came on, Pluto was showing the very first episode, in which Emma ran afoul an online stalker and, as I write this, Pluto is approaching the final episodes, in which Tristan and Miles took the title of the worst Degrassi couple ever.

For the last seven days, I have been binging Degrassi. I haven’t rewatched every episode, of course. I’ve had to sleep. I’ve had to take care of my day-to-day responsibilities. But, when I needed to relax, I sat down on the living room couch and watched Degrassi. I reexperienced everything from Manny’s pregnancy to Craig’s breakdown to Ellie’s cutting to Jimmy’s shooting to Spinner …. well, acting like Spinner. Unfortunately, the show itself became a bit less interesting as the old cast left and the new students enrolled. (I’ve never been able to bring myself to care about Connor.) Later seasons of the show got a bit preachy and it was hard not to get annoyed by the fact that everyone was apparently in a band. (House arrest …. house arrest…. really gets stuck in your head.)

Still, revisiting this show helped to call my nerves during an otherwise stressful week. Thank you, Degrassi and Pluto!

From Inmate to Roommate (A&E)

I watched two episodes of this new reality show on Saturday. The show follows ex-cons as they leave prison and move in with people who have never been to prison. The two episodes were actually interesting, just because of the contrast between the former prisoners and their new roommates. None of the convicts really seem like they benefitted from being in prison. My personal favorite moment was when the leftist, justice reform activist discovered that his new former inmate roommate had no interest spending his first day of freedom at a political protest.

Happy Hour (YouTube)

I watched an episode of this silly 90s game show on Saturday. Dweezil and Ahmet Zappa hosted. Among the celebrities in the competition: Adam West, Vivica A. Fox, Kathy Griffin, Diedrich Bader, and Taylor Dane. The show provided several excuses for Dweezil and Ahmet to perform. Dweezil was (and is) obviously a great guitarist, even when performing on a show as silly as this one. As a vocalist, Ahmet …. well, Ahmet tried really hard.

Midnight Special (YouTube)

I watched an episode of this old variety show on Friday night. The episode was from 1973 and featured some mellow music and the comedy stylings of Fred Willard (amongst others). In fact, the whole thing was almost too mellow for me. I like loud music to which you can dance. Paul Williams showed up and talked about his role in the upcoming film, Battle for the Planet of the Apes. He really didn’t do a very good job selling the movie.

Retro Television Review: Getting Away From It All (dir by Lee Philips)

Posted on June 2, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

For Fred Clark (Larry Hagman) and Mark Selby (Gary Collins), life is New York City just isn’t that much fun anymore. The weather is terrible. The traffic cannot be navigated. The only people ruder than the cabbies are the doormen. Fred and Mark have come up with the perfect plan. They’ve decided to move to a small country town and purchase a house on a small island. In fact, they’re going to buy the entire island! It’s surprisingly cheap. Fred and Mark don’t ever really stop to wonder why the island is available for so little money. Seriously, if you’re buying an island, you should probably ask yourself those questions.

Mark’s wife, Alice (E.J. Peaker), is enthusiastic about the idea. Less excited is Fred’s wife, Helen (Barbara Feldon). Helen enjoys living in the city and having a nice job in an office building. She gets along with her boss (played by Jim Backus, one of many veteran actors to show up in a small role in this film). Perhaps hoping that Fred will change his mind once he’s confronted with the reality of actually living in the country, Helen finally gives in.

It does turn out that the island is not quite the paradise that Fred and Mark were expecting. The only way to get out to the island is in a leaky rowboat. The house is falling apart and, as Helen is disgusted to learn, it also doesn’t have indoor plumbing. There’s no electricity either but fortunately, the local handyman is working on it. His name is Herbie and he’s played by a very young and thin Randy Quaid. If you’ve ever wanted to hear Randy Quaid speak with an exaggerated New England accent, this is the film for you. There’s nothing convincing about Quaid’s accent but it still seems only fair, considering all of the Yankee actors who have butchered the Southern accent over the years.

Just when it looks like Fred and Mark have managed to make the Island livable, they get a disturbing letter. As the new owners of the Island, they owe 20 years worth of back taxes. As Fred puts it, the tax bill is more than either of them can afford. If they can’t raise the money, the town will take back the Island. Fred and Mark consider trying to get jobs but it turns out that neither one of them knows much about being fisherman. They then decide to charm the town into nullifying the tax bill. That turns out to be more difficult than either man imagines.

Getting Away From It All is a comedy that deals with a universal theme, the desire to escape from the harshness of everyday life and find a perfect place to which to escape. That said, the film’s main reason for existing is a parade of comedic cameos. Jim Backus, Vivian Vance, Joe E. Ross, Burgess Meredith, Paul Hartman, and J. Pat O’Malley all appear in small roles, appearing just long enough for 1972 viewers to say, “Hey, I recognize that person!” The end result is a rather shallow film that has a few chuckle-worthy moments. (Again, Randy Quaid pretending to be from Maine has to be worth something.)

In the end, for all of the film’s celebration of getting away from it all, it’s hard not to feel that Gary, Mark, Alice, and Helen will all end up back in Manhattan sooner than later. Some people are just city folks.

Retro Television Reviews Will Return On Sunday, June 2nd

Posted on May 27, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Hi, everyone!

Because of my sprained wrist, I’m going to take a few days off from doing my retro television reviews. (My wrist is definitely healing but it still hurts a bit to type.) So, this feature will return at the end of the week, on Sunday, June 2nd!

Thank you for your patience! — LMB

Retro Television Review: Indict & Convict (dir by Boris Sagal)

Posted on May 26, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay. Today’s film is 1974’s Indict & Convict! It can be viewed on YouTube.

There’s been a murder!

The wife of Assistant District Attorney Sam Belden (William Shatner) has been found, shot to death. Making things especially awkward is that the body of her lover is found next to her. Though Belden is the obvious suspect, he has an alibi for the time of the murders. He claims that he was in Las Vegas, attending a convention. Two gas station attendants remember seeing him filling up his car with gas at around the same time that his wife and her lover was being shot.

Attorney General Timothy Fitzgerald (Ed Flanders) is not so sure that Belden is innocent. He instructs two of his top prosecutors to check out Belden’s story and to see if there’s enough evidence to not only indict but also to convict. Bob Matthews (George Grizzard) is a veteran prosecutor and he’s the one who narrates the story for us. Assisting him is Mike Belano, who is played by the always likable Reni Santoni. Just three years before this movie aired, Santoni played Harry Callahan’s partner in Dirty Harry. There was just something about Santoni’s friendly but determined demeanor that made him perfect the role of the supportive partner or assistant.

The film is very much a legal procedural, with the emphasis on not only the investigation but also on the strategies and the techniques that are used in the courtroom by Matthews and defense attorney DeWitt Foster (Eli Wallach). In many ways, it feels like a forerunner to Law & Order. Usually, I love court procedurals but Indict & Convict was a bit too slow and high-minded for its own good. Maybe it’s because I’ve been spoiled by all of the legal shows that I’ve seen but I have to admit that I spent a good deal of Indict & Convict wanting the prosecutors to get on with it. Flanders, Grizzard, Santoni, and Wallach were all ideally cast but the film itself sometimes got bogged down with all the debate about the best way to win a conviction. It’s a shame because the story itself is an intriguing one and I actually enjoyed the movie’s use of spinning newspaper headlines to let us know what had happened in between scenes. Also, as a classic film fan, I enjoyed seeing Myrna Loy as the judge. She didn’t get to do much other than say, “Sustained” and “Overruled,” but still …. Myrna Loy!

Most people who watch this film will probably do so out of the hope of seeing some trademark Shatner overacting. William Shatner doesn’t actually get to say much in this film. He spends most of the running time sitting silently at the defense table. Towards the end, he does finally get a chance to deliver a brief speech and it’s everything you could hope for. Shatner takes dramatic pauses. Shatner emphasizes random words. Every line is delivered with the subtext of, “Pay attention, Emmy voters!” Eventually, Shatner would learn the value of laughing at oneself but apparently, that lesson had not yet been learned when he did Indict & Convict.

Mini Late Night Retro Television Review: Check It Out! 2.8 “Homewrecker Howard”

Posted on May 25, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

I sprained my wrist earlier this week and, as a result, typing is a bit painful. So, for this week and this week only, I’m doing quick, mini-reviews that will hopefully get my point across without requiring too much discomfort on my part. Luckily, this is a format that works just fine when one is discussing a show like Check It Out!

Episode 2.8 “Homewrecker Howard”

(Dir by Alan Erlich, originally aired on November 21st, 1986)

This was just dumb.

Jack Christian is dating a woman (Randall Carpenter) who he met at the store. He’s also lying to her, telling her that he’s the store manager. The woman happens to be married and she’s also a friend of Edna’s. After the woman tells Edna that she’s getting back at her unfaithful husband by having an affair with the manager of the store, Edna assumes that Howard is cheating on her.

I’ve often said that I hate idiot plots. An idiot plot is any story where every complication could be prevented by the characters 1) not being complete idiots and 2) actually asking each other detailed questions and getting an answer before jumping to conclusions. This episode was a classic example of the idiot plot. Edna doesn’t tell Howard why she’s mad at him and Howard doesn’t bother to ask. Things don’t get straightened out until the woman’s husband (Tom Butler) shows up at the store and announces that he wants to beat up the manager.

Will this show ever figure out who Howard Bannister is supposed to be? Sometimes, he’s a great manager who cares about his employees. In this episode, he’s a pompous windbag who puts a cardboard cut-out of himself on the salesfloor. Sometimes, Howard is the world’s best and most romantic boyfriend. In this episode, he’s so clueless that he barely notices that Edna is angry at him and Edna, it must be said, has no problem believing that he would be unfaithful. Edna both lives and works with Howard so when exactly is he ever out of her sight long enough to have the wild affair that the woman describes herself as having?

As I said …. IDIOT PLOT!

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 5/19/24 — 5/25/24

Posted on May 25, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Abbott Elementary (Wednesday Night, ABC)

Okay, I’ll admit it. I was wrong. I thought last week was the finale but it turns out, the season finale was this week. And what a finale. Janine threw a party and learned a lesson about not being a control freak. Gregory finally stopped being so annoying and kissed Janine. Yay! And what’s really great is that all of this was due to the wonderful advice of Mr. Johnson, who is one of the best characters on television right now. I had some issues with this season but this finale made up for almost all of them.

Baby Reindeer (Netflix)

I watched the first episode of Netflix’s acclaimed stalking drama on Tuesday. It was undoubtedly well-made but it was coming from a bit too dark of a place for me so I haven’t watched any of other episodes yet. I’ll watch the rest of it next week.

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)

I wrote about Baywatch Nights here!

Booked: First Day In (Hulu)

I watched a few episodes of this A&E series on Tuesday night. It follows people as they are being booked into jail. As always with these shows, the cops came across as being cocky jerks while the people being booked were far more sympathetic. I felt especially bad for the 70 year-old owner of a used car dealership who was booked for the crime of not putting some tag on the windshield of some of his cars. Seriously, if you didn’t already hate the regulatory state already….

Check It Out! (Tubi)

A mini-review of this week’s episode will be dropping in a few hours.

CHiPs (Freevee)

I wrote about CHiPs here!

Degrassi Junior High (YouTube)

I wrote about Degrassi Junior High here!

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched an episode of Dr. Phil in which Phil interviewed a woman who had coached her 4 year-old son to falsely accuse her ex-husband of being a part of a child porn ring. The man was obviously innocent and easily passed a polygraph test. In what can only be described as being a massive tell, the woman appeared to be upset at the fact that her husband was cleared of a terrible crime.

On Saturday, I watched an episode with a teenage girl who got pregnant because she wanted to be on 16 and Pregnant. Ugh. That entire episode made me want to throw something.

Fantasy Island (DVR)

I wrote about Fantasy Island here!

Friday the 13th: The Series (YouTube)

I wrote about Friday the 13th here!

Highway to Heaven (Tubi)

I wrote about Highway to Heaven here!

The Larry Sanders Show (Max)

Jeff and I watched a few episodes of this old HBO show on Thursday night. Rip Torn made me laugh every time he spoke. What a great actor!

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I wrote about The Love Boat here!

Malibu CA (YouTube)

I wrote about this terrible show here!

Miami Vice (Prime)

I wrote about Miami Vice here!

Monsters (YouTube)

I wrote about Monsters here!

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday night, Jeff & I watched an episode that profiled musician Bryan Ferry.

T and T (Tubi)

I wrote about T and T here!

Welcome Back Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back Kotter here!

Mini Retro Television Review: Welcome Back Kotter 3.23 “Goodbye, Mr. Kripps”

Posted on May 25, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC from 1975 to 1979. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

As I mentioned yesterday, I’ve got a sprained wrist so typing is kind of painful. For that reason, today’s review is going to be a quick one. You might even call it a …. MINI REVIEW!

Episode 3.23 “Goodbye, Mr. Kripps”

(Dir by Bob Claver, originally aired on February 16th, 1978)

Shop teacher Mr. Kripps (Jack Fletcher) is famous for being cranky and for not liking the Sweathogs. Even when Gabe was a student at the school, Mr. Kripps was a teacher known for his bad temper. When Mr. Kripps drops dead of a heart attack, only Barbarino is shocked. Barbarino also feels guilty because Mr. Kripps was yelling at him when he died.

Woodman, Gabe, and the Sweathogs attends the funeral and then all return to Gabe’s apartment. I get that the Sweathogs are in a co-dependent relationship with Gabe but why is Woodman at the apartment? Gabe and the Sweathogs are depressed. Woodman talks about how July is the best month for a funeral. “August is too hot!”

Barbarino turns himself into the police for murder. Awwwww, poor Barbarino! Seriously, this is an unbelievably dumb thing to do but John Travolta is so crestfallen and child-like as Babarino that your heart still breaks for him. No-nonsense Lt. Eddie Lasky (Norman Alden) comes down to the school to investigate Mr. Kripps’s death. Gabe and Lasky help Barbarino to understand that it’s not his fault that Mr. Kripps had anger problems. And again, it’s kind of dumb but Gabe Kaplan and Norman Alden play off of each other really well and Travolta’s puppy-dog earnestness just makes you want to hug him.

Woodman gets upset when he sees that Lasky parked in his spot. Woodman vandalizes Lasky’s car and gets taken to jail. When he returns to the school, Gabe cheers him up with a joke about Uncle Willie, who was sentenced to a 99-year sentence.

This was a good episode. It felt like a throwback to the humane and sweet-natured episodes of the first season. Travolta once again shows why he’s the Sweathog who ended up with the Oscar nominations.

Mini Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 2.5 “Symphony in B Sharp”

Posted on May 24, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!

Hi, everyone! I sprained my wrist yesterday and today, it still hurts to type so, just as with T and T, today’s review is going to be a quick one. You might even call it a mini-review!

Episode 2.5 “Symphony In B Sharp”

(Dir by Francis Delia, originally aired on October 31st, 1988)

Oh, Ryan!

You would think that, by this point, Ryan would know better than to fall in love with anyone, seeing as how he had to leave one girlfriend behind in a Mennonite village and he lost another girlfriend to an insane news anchorman. Add to that, Ryan has also seen Micki repeatedly lose the people with which she has fallen in love. But, once again, the episode finds Ryan falling in love.

This time, his lover is Leslie Reins (Ely Pouget), who plays violin in the local symphony. Her former boyfriend, Janos Korda (James Russo), was believed to have been killed in a car accident but instead, he’s alive but terribly scarred. He hangs out in the rafters and the basement of the symphony hall and kills anyone who get too close to Leslie. He has a cursed violin that is slowly healing his disfigured appearance in return for Janos using a sharpened bow to kill people. Janos’s newest target is Ryan.

Yep, it’s Phantom of the Opera all over again, with Leslie Reins’s last name deliberately invoking the name of a past actor who played the Phantom, Claude Rains. It’s not a bad episode. There’s plenty of atmosphere and James Russo makes for a good villain. That said, the cursed antique is not that interesting and the whole episode leans a bit too much into the Phantom of the Opera story. It was a bit predictable, right down Janos accidentally killing Leslie before taking his own life and Ryan ending yet another episode in tears, with a concerned Jack and Micki watching from a distance. Ryan listens to a recording of Leslie playing her violin and swears that he’ll never fall in love again. We know that’s not true, Ryan. I guess we should be glad that Ryan is no longer looking to hook up with his cousin but still, it’s hard to feel that the guy just can’t get a break!

Next week, hopefully, things will look up for Ryan. (It would seem that they certainly couldn’t get any worse.) We’ll find out soon enough.

Mini Retro Television Review: T and T 3.10 “Silent Witness”

Posted on May 24, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on Tubi!

Hi, everyone! I sprained my wrist yesterday and today, it still hurts to type so today’s review is going to be a quick one. You might even call it a mini-review!

Episode 3.10 “Silent Witness”

(Dir by Alan Simmonds, originally aired on March 10th, 1990)

When a bank is robbed, a young deaf boy named Vito (Daniel DeSanto) is the only witness to catch sight of one of the robbers without his mask on. The police bring in T.S. to keep an eye on the kid until it is time to testify.

This was a sweet episode. Mr. T, who has occasionally seemed a bit bored with the third season of this show, really brightened up when he was acting opposite DeSanto. One gets the feeling that both T.S. and Mr. T are naturally protective of kids. It was nice to see Mr. T being warm-hearted instead of grumpy and annoyed. It felt like a flashback to the first season, when T.S. Turner was still an earnest idealist.

Proving that everyone has to start somewhere, the great character actor Henry Czerny shows up here as a corrupt cop.

This episode suffered a bit due to its short running time. Stuffing an hour’s worth of plot led to things occasionally feeling a bit rushed.

The episode ended with Vito watching Turner argue with a detective (Richard Fitzpatrick) and finally speaking, for the first time in the episode. “Stop!” Vito says. It was a nice note to end on. Stop arguing and just be happy that the case has been solved.

And that seems like a good place to stop this review.