
by Robert Gibson Jones
This cover is from 1943. Always have a whip handy.

by Robert Gibson Jones
This cover is from 1943. Always have a whip handy.
Today’s music video of the day comes from the two less annoying members of U2, Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen. Their re-interpretation of the Mission: Impossible theme was recorded for the first film in the series, bringing the franchise into the 90s. I am old enough that I can remember when the first Mission: Impossible film was released. I don’t think anyone expected the series to become what it currently is.
This video was directed by Kevin Godley, who has also worked with Fine Young Cannibals, Bryan Adams, Blur, and Hozier.
Enjoy!
This week was all about getting caught up on the shows that might be nominated for this year’s Emmys. I ended up watching a lot of TV. Here’s a few thoughts on it all!
60 Days In (A&E)
I watched this show’s seventh season this week. Sending former criminals undercover was an interesting idea and Carlos, who struggled with the temptation to return to his old ways, was definitely the most compelling character this season. It really was one of the worst jails that they’ve ever featured on this show. It’s easy to be dismissive of a show like this and it definitely is a bit exploitive. But it also does portray why jails fail to rehabilitate its inmates.
Big Beasts (Apple TV+)
I watched an episode on Friday about the great whales! I enjoyed it. Whales are fascinating creatures and it certainly didn’t hurt that the whole thing was narrated by Tom Hiddleston.
City Guys (YouTube)
The Crown (Netflix)
I’ve always had mixed feelings about The Crown. On the one hand, I absolutely love it as a well-made, well-acted, and well-produced royal soap opera. On the other hand, I have never been comfortable about the idea of turning anyone’s life into a miniseries while they’re still alive. Of course, Queen Elizabeth passed away last year but the show itself still feels a bit invasive. That said, the fifth season was as addictive as ever. Imelda Stauton took over at Elizabeth. Dominic West made Charles into a far more interesting person than he probably is in real life. Of all the seasons so far, this season was the most melancholy as it portrayed a world that was suddenly changing faster than ever before. Not only did Charles and Diana divorce but the UK lost Hong Kong. The decommissioning Britannia felt like the true end of an era. It was hard to watch this season without thinking about how the people portrayed had no idea how much worse things were going to get in just a few more years.
Daisy Jones & The Six (Prime)
I binged this miniseries on Tuesday and Wednesday. Full of music and 70s atmosphere, this series charted the rise and the fall of a fictional rock group. Riley Keough, who really seems like she should be a bigger star, was wonderful in the lead role.
Dead To Me (Netflix)
Unfortunately, I really haven’t had time to binge the final season of Dead To Me but I did jump ahead and watch the final episode on Saturday afternoon. Christina Applegate and Linda Cardellini were still a great and messy team and I definitely got a bit watery-eyed at the episode’s conclusion.
The Diplomat (Netflix)
I watched the first episode of this show on Wednesday. It didn’t really hold my attention but Keri Russell was convincing as the title character and it was kind of amusing to see Michael McKean playing an apparently sincere and idealistic president.
Fleishman Is In Trouble (Hulu)
This was an excellent miniseries that I binged on Monday and Tuesday. Jesse Eisenberg and Claire Danes were excellent as a divorced couple who struggled with life in New York City. This miniseries felt like some great 70s movie that just happened to be set in 2016.
Forgive or Forget (YouTube)
I watched an episode on Thursday. Former best friends were demanding apologies. Very few apologies were given, which I think may have been due to the fact that host Robin Givens kept interrupting everyone so that she could yell at them. If Mother Love had been there, everyone would have come through the door.
House of the Dragon (HBO)
HBO’s Game of Thrones prequel turned out to be quite a bit better than I was expecting. That said, I would be lying if I said that I was always able to follow what was happening on the show without the help of Wikipedia. I had the same problem with Game of Thrones, to be honest. However, the chaos and the feeling that you could never be sure who was actually plotting what was one of the things that made both the early seasons of Game of Thrones and the first season of this show so intriguing.
The Last Of Us (HBO)
I binged this throughout the week and I have to say that I’m a bit disappointed in myself that I didn’t watch it earlier. Because I had so much to watch this week, I feel as if I rushed through the show, going from one episode to another so quickly that I didn’t get a chance to really contemplate and savor everything that happened. That said, The Last Of Us was well-acted and created a convincing dystopian society. For once, the “zombie” apocalypse felt realistic as opposed to contrived.
The Last Thing He Told Me (Apple TV+)
Enjoyably twisty and melodramatic, this adaptation of Laura Dave’s novel featured great performances from Jennifer Garner, Angourie Rice, and David Morse. Even though I had read the novel and knew what was going to happen, the show still held my interest
Love & Death (Max)
Elizabeth Olsen and Jesse Plemons were great but this limited series’s story was better told by Hulu’s Candy. As a producer and a writer, David E. Kelly has always had a tendency to rely on easy caricatures and too much of Love & Death felt like a Yankee fantasy of what life in small town Texas is like.
The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)
I wrote about The Love Boat here!
The Master (Tubi)
I wrote about The Master here!
MH370: The Plane That Disappeared (Netflix)
During the early hours of Wednesday morning, I watched this 3-part docuseries on the Malaysian airline that mysteriously disappeared a few years ago. (Remember Don Lemmon suggesting it had flown into a black hole?) It was interesting viewing, though ultimately I think it works better as a look at how quick people are to buy into conspiracy theories than anything else.
Midnight Special (YouTube)
From 1973, the first episode of Midnight Special was hosted by Helen Reddy and featured performances from Ike and Tina Turner, George Carlin, Curtis Mayfield, Don McLean, Rare Earth, Kenny Rankin, The Byrds, and The Impressions. Helen Reddy was a bit of a boring host but the music was great.
The Old Man (Hulu)
With the Emmy nominations due to be announced next Tuesday, I finally got around to binging The Old Man this week. On the one hand, it was yet another morally ambiguous thriller featuring the government pursuing a former agent who had gone underground. On the other hand, Jeff Bridges, John Lithgow, and Amy Brenneman all brought a lot of conviction to their roles and the film was as much about dealing with one’s own morality as it was about dealing with the dark side of the intelligence community. I liked it far more than I was expecting too.
The Patient (Hulu)
I watched the first three episodes of this miniseries on Monday morning and that was enough for me. Steve Carell plays a psychiatrist who is being held captive by a serial killer (Domhnall Gleeson) who is looking for help curbing his homicidal impulses. Carell gave a great performance, proving again that he’s just as capable of doing drama as he is comedy. But, other than Carell’s performance, I found the show to be tedious and I haven’t felt any real desire to finish binging it.
Real Time With Bill Maher (Max)
I watched the episode where Russell Brand yelled at John Heilenmann. I was on Brand’s side but a lot of that has to do with Heilenmann just be annoying in general. Bernie Sanders was also on the show and seemed kind of tired of the whole thing.
Rollergames (YouTube)
On the 2nd episode of Rollergames (which I watched with Jeff and our friend Pat on Friday night), the Thunderbirds competed against Bad Attitude. Thunderbirds were heroic but Bad Attitude had style. I’m not sure who actually won.
Slasher: Ripper (Shudder)
I’m always tempted to call this program Canadian Horror Story but Slasher is actually far better than Ryan Murphy’s show. The fifth season, which I binged throughout the week, has an intriguing mystery, many macabre deaths, a lot of atmosphere, and a wonderfully villainous performance from Eric McCormack.
Trainwreck: Woodstock ’99 (Netflix)
I finally watched this docuseries on Saturday morning, after finishing up Midnight Special. I guess I was in a musical mode. The mix of hubris, greed, and celebrity that went into making Woodstock ’99 a disaster will never not be fascinating.
Welcome Back, Kotter (Tubi)
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC from 1975 to 1979. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!
This week, Barbarino gets a girlfriend and Gabe nearly gets killed by Julie.
Episode 1.11 “Barbarino’s Girl”
(Dir by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on November 25th, 1975)
At the start of this episode, Gabe tells Julie a joke about his uncle and a monkey. I didn’t get it. Julie didn’t look that amused either.
At school, the Sweathogs are not in a good mood because it’s report card time! Gabe tells the Sweathogs not to panic because apparently, even if they are failing Social Studies, they still have time to raise their grades. (So, I guess Gabe is handing out progress reports as opposed to report cards.) Epstein has a note from his mother’s doctor explaining that any bad grades would be bad for her health. (He actually has several notes, one for each class.) The note is signed “Epstein’s Mother’s Doctor.”
Freddie, meanwhile, tries to bribe Gabe with a half-eaten apple while Horshack falls to his knees and begs for a good grade. Only Barbarino doesn’t beg, probably because he knows that he’s the best-looking guy in the school and when you’ve got a smile like that, who needs brains?
Gabe passes out the report cards. Epstein says, “Thanks for killing my mother.” Freddie takes back his apple. Horshack starts to laugh in his braying way. Gabe asks Horshack what’s so funny about his bad grade. Horshack replies that he’s laughing at Barbarino’s even worse grade. Barbarino, it turns out, actually does care about his grades because his mother is a saint who apparently hits him with rosary beads whenever he brings home a bad grade. Gabe says that he can’t just pass Vinne to be nice. He asks what Vinnie would become if everyone just passed him without checking to make sure that he actually learned something. “A high school graduate,” Vinnie says and he has a point.
Speaking of high school and grades and getting held back, I noticed that Barbarino, Freddie, Epstein, and Horshack appear to be the only regular members of the class. This episode featured a lot of students getting upset over their report card and I think one reason they struggled with Kotter’s class is that none of them had ever attended before. Seriously, who are half these people!? I definitely would have noticed that goony redhead sitting in the corner if he had ever attended class before this episode.
Gabe arranges for Barbarino to get some tutoring from Judy Borden (Helaine Lembeck), the same girl that ran against him for student body president. Though Judy and Barbarino initially don’t get along, they soon bond of their shared love of rhyming insults. Unfortunately, the other Sweathogs give Barbarino a hard time about his new friendship with Judy and Barbarino is stunned when Judy turns down his offer of a date. However, Judy later changes her mind and goes to Coney Island with Barbarino and the Sweathogs. Awwwww!
Back at the apartment, Gabe tells Julie a joke about his cousin, Gorgeous Jerry Kotter. It was short joke and apparently, the point was that Gorgeous Jerry had a lot of back hair.
This episode pretty much existed so that John Travolta could do his dumb but sweet routine and I have no problem with that because he did it very well and he showed off that smile that could light up a room. Plus, Barbarino and Judy Borden were a cute couple. That said, I’ll be surprised if their relationship is ever mentioned again.
Episode 1.12 “California Dreamin'”
(Dir by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on December 2nd, 1975)
At the apartment, Gabe tells Julie a joke about the time that his teacher asked him who signed the Declaration of Independence. Gabe replied, “I didn’t sign it.” Later, Gabe’s father came to the school and backed him up. Good for him.
Back at school….
Hey look! The goony redhead is back!
And the goony redhead gets some company when Mr. Woodman stops by the classroom to introduce a transfer student from California. Her name is Bambi (Susan Lanier) and she tells everyone that she loves the beach. She also requests that everyone call her Sunshine.
All the Sweathogs are smitten but Bambi seems to be more interested in Mr. Kotter, asking him what his sign is. Gabe reveals that he’s an Aquarius. “I knew it!” Bambi shouts. Bambi asks Gabe to show her around. Gabe suggests that she ask one of the Sweathogs. “They’re not groovy like you,” Bambi replies.
After the school day ends, Gabe returns to his apartment. Julie asks him why a girl named Sunshine has been repeatedly calling the apartment and asking whether or not Gabe wants to go skinny dipping. Julie is so annoyed that she even puts on her glasses so that her withering stare can be magnified.
Julie asks Gabe if he has anything to say for himself.
“Yes,” Gabe replies, “Can I go?”
Gabe explains that Sunshine has a crush on him but he also tells Julie that he’ll explain to Sunshine tomorrow that they cannot run off together. He says that he’s sure that he can get Sunshine to understand and, “If she doesn’t, I promise I’ll write.” Julie attacks Gabe with a pillow in a way that suggests that she’s genuinely furious with him. Reportedly, Marcia Strassman and Gabe Kaplan did not get along during the production of Welcome Back, Kotter and, in this episode, Julie really does seem like she’s just looking for an excuse to kill her husband.
Back in the classroom, each Sweathog tries to impress Bambi. Epstenin chants her name. Horshack shows up with a walking stick, an overcoat, and sunglasses and pretends to be a Hollywood producer. Freddie sings a calypso song about how Santa Claus is black. Barbarino rushes into the room and sings, “I’m singing ba-ba-ba-ba-Barbino!” while the audience goes crazy.
Gabe, however, asks to speak to Bambi in the hallway. He reveals that he checked her records and discovered that she’s not from California. She’s from Lubbock and she’s been to 11 different schools, where she has always caused trouble. Bambi decides to show Gabe what type of trouble she can cause by entering the room and announcing that her pencil is on Gabe’s desk. Barbarino, Freddie, Epstein, and Horshack lunge for it.
After Gabe points out how foolish everyone is acting over her, Bambi sees the folly of her ways and tells everyone the truth. The Sweathogs are very forgiving, probably because the last thing they were interested in, as far as Bambi was concerned, was what state she was from.
Back the apartment, Gabe wakes up Julie in the middle of the night to tell her about his Uncle Herbie. Julie rolls her eyes as Gabe talks about how his Aunt Estelle tried to trick Herbie into giving up alcohol and how it didn’t work.
I liked this episode more than I thought I would. My family moved around a lot when I was growing up so I could relate to how Bambi felt about having to always make a big first impression at every new school that she went to. Even if Marcia Strassman seemed to be annoyed by his very existence, Gabe Kaplan gave a good performance in this episode, especially in the scene where he confronted Bambi with the truth about her background. All in all, this was a pretty good episode.
Next week — Horshack gets promoted out of remedial classes!
As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We tweet our way through it.
Tonight, for #ScarySocial, I will be hosting 1980’s Graduation Day! Someone’s killing high school athletes! Is it Christopher George, Vanna White, Linnea Quigley, or the band Felony? Join us to find out!
If you want to join us on Saturday night, just hop onto twitter, start the film at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag! The film is available on Prime and Tubi. I’ll be there co-hosting and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well. It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.
Today, as Beck celebrates his 53rd birthday, we celebrate his video for Where It’s At. Directed by Steven Hanft, this video shows the many sides of Beck. He’s a rebel picking up trash for community service. He’s a country line dancer. He’s a robot that bears a resemblance to MST 3K’s Tom Servo. And finally, he’s William Shatner performing at the Saturn Awards.
Director Steve Hanft has also worked with the Cure, Primal Scream, and Delinquent Habits. Before this video, he directed the video for Loser, which introduced Beck to the world.
Enjoy!
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing The Master, which ran on NBC from January to August of 1984. The show can be found on Tubi!
This week, McAllister and Max head to Washington, D.C.!
Episode 1.9 “Kunoichi”
(Dir by Gordon Hessler, originally aired on April 9th, 1984)
The 9th episode of The Master opens by showing us what Okasa (Sho Kosugi) has been doing since coming to America to track down and kill his former teacher, John Peter McAllister (Lee Van Cleef). Okasa has been training an apprentice of his own. The apprentice ninja is always seen while wearing a light gray ninja uniform, the better to keep the apprentice’s identity a secret until halfway through the episode.
Meanwhile, McAllister and Max (Tim Van Patten) are in Washington, D.C. As McAllister explains it, he was good friends with Brian Elkwood (Jack Kelly) when they both served in the Army together. During the Korean War, they were both held in the same POW camp and they escaped together. (This, of course, goes against McAllister’s previous backstory, which was that he left the Army after World War II and spent the next 40 years hidden away in Japan.) Elkwood is now an important advisor to the President. Apparently, Elkwood sent McAllister a letter informing him that a spy known as The Hawk was threatening his life so McAllister has come to Washington to protect him. (How exactly McAllister received a letter when he and Max are constantly driving around the country in search of McAllister’s daughter is not explained.)
At the Elkwood estate, Brian Elkwood tells his assistant, Allison Grant (Kelly Harmon), that he has been receiving letters from John Peter McAllister in which McAllister has threatened to kill him. Allison argues that McAllister has always been Elkwood’s friend but Elkwood says that people can change. Elkwood’s head of security, Ron Gordon (Rick Hill), is concerned not only about McAllister but also about uncovering the identity of The Hawk.
Or at least, that’s what Gordon claims. A few scenes later, we discover that Gordon actually is The Hawk and that he’s hired Okasa to assassinate Elkwood. Okasa is planning on framing McAllister for the assassination. The assassination will be carried about his apprentice, who we learn is close to Elkwood. The episode tries to build up a lot of suspense over who Okasa’s apprentice actually is but it’s actually pretty easy to figure out. Elkwood is not the apprentice because he’s the target. Gordon is the not apprentice because he’s the Hawk. There’s only one other guest star on this episode so obviously, the apprentice is Allison. Myself, I’m just confused as to when Okasa’s mission went from personally killing McAllister to framing him for murder.
Eventually, McAllister is able to convince Elkwood that he didn’t write the threatening letters but a sudden attack of Okasa’s apprentice leaves Elkwood hospitalized and McAllister arrested for attempted murder. Fortunately, Max is able to use his ninja training to help McAllister escape from jail and they manage to not only prevent the second attempt on Elkwood’s life but they also expose both Gordon and Allison as being enemies of the state. Yay!
This is one of those episodes where everyone, with the exception of Sho Kosugi, steps to the side and lets their stunt doubles do most of the work. There’s a lot of fights but they are all awkwardly choreographed and framed, probably in an attempt to keep the audience from noticing that Lee Van Cleef’s stunt person was notably thinner and more athletic than Lee was. As far as episodes of The Master are concerned, this was not a bad one but it still ultimately leaves the viewer feeling that it could have been so much better.
As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter and I hope to continue to be until the site finally becomes unusable. (It’s going to happen eventually so enjoy it while you can!) I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We tweet our way through it.
Tonight, at 10 pm et, #FridayNightFlix has got 1984’s Sheena, starring Tanya Roberts and Blossom’s dad!
If you want to join us this Friday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 10 pm et, and use the #FridayNightFlix hashtag! It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.
Sheena is available on Prime! See you there!

by Earl Norem
I love this because a woman is in charge but that’s still not the most practical pirate uniform. This cover is from 1960.