Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 3/5/23 — 3/11/23

Here’s just a few thoughts on what I watched this week:

Abbott Elementary (Wednesday Night, ABC)

Now, I want to play Drought.

Accused (Tuesday Night, FOX)

After missing the previous two episodes, I caught the latest episode of Accused on Tuesday night.  Whitney Cummings played a comedian who was a raped by another comedian.  Mary Lynn Rajskub played the clingy fan who offered support but who later turned out to be dangerous in her own way.  This episode was a bit overwritten, which tends to be a problem with many anthology shows.  But it was saved by the excellent performances of Rajskub and Cummings.

American Idol (Sunday Night, ABC)

The auditions moved to Nashville!  A lot of talented singers made it through to Hollywood but …. eh, I don’t know.  The best singers are usually the ones who may not be technically perfect but who bring their own individual personality to their performances.  So far, there hasn’t been much personality this season.  Everyone’s a bit too polished and the judges already seem to know who is going through before they ever hear one note.  I guess I’m old-fashioned as far as my reality show preferences go.  I don’t care how tragic your life has been or what your family is like.  I just care about whether or not you’re an interesting and entertaining performer.

The Bachelor (Monday Night, ABC)

Eh.  Who cares?

Bar Rescue (Weekday Mornings, Paramount)

I watched two episodes on Wednesday morning.  Both featured bars that were so disgusting and filthy that it made me happy to be a non-drinker.  The second episode that I watched actually featured the bar’s cook taking a bath in the dishwashing area.  BLEH!  That was not exactly something I needed to see.

Bubblegum Crisis (Night Flight Plus)

I have no idea what was actually happening in this animated series from Japan but the imagery was nice and a lot of things blew up.

Court Cam (Weekday Mornings, A&E)

I watched two episodes on Wednesday.  Angry defendants were making trouble.  Dan Abrams breathlessly narrated every single event.  One defendant attacked his own lawyer.  I’m going to assume that someone else probably handled his appeal after he was convicted for that.

Farmer Wants A Wife (Wednesday Night, FOX)

Apparently, this show is 1) based on a British program and 2) also a reboot of a show that aired on the CW way back in 2008.  Basically, a bunch of city girls compete for the chance to marry four farmers.  The  dramatic high point of the first episode came when the farmers had to ask each girl, “Do you want to come back to my farm?” and the women were then given the choice to say yes or to walk out.  Only one girl walked out.  Everyone else was like, “I’d love to go back to the farm with you!”  This show felt a lot like Burning Love, the brilliant and much-missed parody of The Bachelor franchise.

I enjoyed the first episode, though.  With The Bachelor a bit of a bore this season, Farmer Wants A Wife might temporarily replace it as my new guilty pleasure show.  I’m always torn between my love of the city and my nostalgia for the country so this is a show to which I can relate.  Plus, the farmers are all handsome and strong and they don’t look like the types to spend a lot of time crying about the state of the world.  This show brings out my country girl side.  I think my accent got a hundred times more Southern while I was watchin’ it.

Ghosts (Thursday Night, CBS)

This week’s episode was great.  I hope Matt Walsh makes a guest appearance every season.

Jared From Subway (Monday Night, ID)

This three-hour documentary detailed, in repulsive detail, the crimes of Jared Fogle and his associate, Russell Taylor.  On the one hand, it did a good job of showing how America’s cult of celebrity allowed Jared to flourish.  On the other hand, Rochelle Herman, the journalist who first recorded Jared talking about his desires, often came across as being more concerned with promoting herself than anything else.  Between the use of blurry reenactments and the people who were interviewed solely so they could talk about how “beautiful” Rochelle was, the documentary was occasionally its own worst enemy.

The New Wave Theatre (Night Flight Plus)

I watched an episode of this 80s cable access show on Saturday morning.  The music was good and loud.

Night Court (Tuesday Night, NBC)

Abby is all excited because her favorite podcast host is in the court to serve as a witness.  Abby thinks that the going-ons at the court would make a great podcast!  The host, however, only wants to interview Dan.  Dan talks about running for the city council in the 80s and bribing people to vote.  “It was hard to get people to vote in the 80s,” Dan says, “there were other things to do …. like cocaine!  Plus, Pac-Man had just come out and that was the perfect surface on which to do cocaine.”  Okay, that made me laugh.  The rest of the episode was fairly forgettable.  The problem is that Dan is the only consistently well-written character and John Larroquette so completely dominates the show that it’s hard not to kind of resent having to spend time with any of the other characters.

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday, I watched an episode from the early 80s.  It was about erotic imagery in music videos.  Prince and Madonna were heavily featured.

Poker Face (Thursday Night, Peacock)

Though it took me a month and a half to get around to it, I finally watched the first episode of Poker Face on Tuesday night. I resisted because the commercials (“Meet Charlie Cale, you’re going to like her.”) annoyed me and the show’s creator Rian Johnson is undeniably talented but also makes films that occasionally seem to be a bit too impressed with their own cleverness. However, Poker Face has been critically acclaimed since it premiered and I do like Natasha Lyonne and Benjamin Bratt so I decided to finally give the show a chance.

The first episode was set in Nevada and set up the premise of the series. Lyonne stars as Charlie, who has the ability to tell whenever anyone is lying. Over the course of the episode she discovered that her boss (played by Adrian Brody) was a liar and, after his suicide, she had to go on the run. The episode looked great. I loved the sight of Charlie’s little trailer sitting in the desert and I also liked the contrast between the opulent casino and the messy house where the episode’s murder actually took place. Plotwise, it suffered from a problem that is typical of pilots in that it tried to cram too much information into a limited amount of time. That said, it held my interest and Natasha Lyonne was sympathetic and likable as Charlie. I did find myself wishing that Charlie would cut down on the alcohol but I guess that’s what people do when they’re stuck in a go-nowhere situation. They drink to dull the pain.

The second episode was set in New Mexico and featured Charlie not only solving the murder of a Subway employee who had just won the lottery but also proving that a trucker was not a murderer.  The mystery itself wasn’t that interesting (and really, since both episodes opened with showing us the murder being committed, it technically really wasn’t a mystery) but, again, the episode was entertaining due to Lyonne’s performance.  Since this show is apparently going to reveal the identity of the murderer at the start of each murderer and then show how Charlie eventually learns the truth, it’s important that the lead character be likable and interesting.  As much as I hate to admit it, the commercials were right.  I like Charlie Cale.

South Park (Wednesday Night, Comedy Central)

“Written by Trey Parker and ChatGPT.”

I loved this week’s episode, mostly because it confirmed that ChatGPT is going to eventually transform the world into a cold, barren place where people have no appreciation for art or literature.  It’s not a happy vision of the future but at least we’ve been warned so it won’t be too much of a shock.

Survivor (Wednesday Night, CBS)

I wrote about the latest episode of Survivor at the Reality TV Chat Blog!

Here Are The 2022 Razzie Results

Ugh.  I hate the Razzies.  Blonde was pretty bad, though.  I don’t agree with Tom Hanks as Worst Supporting Actor, though.  Tom Hanks’s performance may have been strange but it was appropriate for Elvis.

Anyway, here are the results:

Worst Picture
WINNER: Blonde
Disney’s Pinocchio
Good Mourning
The King’s Daughter

Worst Actor
Colson Baker (aka Machine Gun Kelly) / Good Mourning
Pete Davidson (Voice Only) / Marmaduke
Tom Hanks (as Gepetto) / Disney’s Pinocchio
WINNER: Jared Leto / Morbius
Sylvester Stallone / Samaritan

Worst Actress
WINNER: The Razzies*
Bryce Dallas Howard / Jurassic Park: Dominion
Diane Keaton / Mack & Rita
Kaya Scodelario / The King’s Daughter
Alicia Silverstone / The Requin

*The Razzies withdrew 12-year-old Firestarter star Ryan Kiera Armstrong’s nomination after sparking controversy online and nominated itself in the category.

Worst Remake/Rip-off/Sequel
BOTH 365 Days sequels — 365 Days: This Day and The Next 365 Days [a Razzie BOGO]
WINNER: Disney’s Pinocchio
Jurassic World: Dominion

Worst Supporting Actress
WINNER: Adria Arjona / Morbius
Lorraine Bracco (voice only) / Disney’s Pinocchio
Penélope Cruz / The 355
Fan Bingbing / The 355 and The King’s Daughter
Mira Sorvino / Lamborghini: The Man Behind the Legend

Worst Supporting Actor
Pete Davidson (cameo role) / Good Mourning
WINNER: Tom Hanks / Elvis
Xavier Samuel / Blonde
Mod Sun / Good Mourning
Evan Williams / Blonde

Worst Screen Couple
Colson Baker (aka Machine Gun Kelly) and Mod Sun / Good Mourning
Both Real Life Characters in the Fallacious White House Bedroom Scene / Blonde
WINNER: Tom Hanks and His Latex-Laden Face (and Ludicrous Accent) / Elvis
Andrew Dominik and His Issues With Women / Blonde
The Two 365 Days Sequels (both released in 2022)

Worst Director
Judd Apatow / The Bubble
WINNER: Colson Baker (aka Machine Gun Kelly) and Mod Sun / Good Mourning
Andrew Dominik / Blonde
Daniel Espinosa / Morbius
Robert Zemeckis / Disney’s Pinocchio

Worst Screenplay
WINNER: Blonde / Written for the screen by Andrew Dominik, adapted from the bio-novel by Joyce Carol Oates
Disney’s Pinocchio / Screenplay by Robert Zemeckis and Chris Weitz (not authorized by the estate of Carlo Collodi)
Good Mourning / “Written” by Machine Gun Kelly and Mod Sun
Jurassic World: Dominion / Screenplay by Emily Carmichael and Colin Trevorrow, story by Trevorrow and Derek Connolly
Morbius / Screen story and screenplay by Matt Sazama and Burk Sharpless

Lisa Marie’s Final 2022 Oscar Predictions

Since the Oscars are now 24 hours away, I guess it’s time for me to make my final predictions as to how the show will go on Sunday.

Best Picture — Everything Everywhere All At Once

Best Director — The Daniels for Everything Everywhere All At Once

Best Actor — Brendan Fraser in The Whale

Best Actress — Michelle Yeoh in Everything Everywhere All At Once

Best Supporting Actor — Ke Huy Quan in Everything Everywhere All At Once

Best Supporting Actress — Angela Bassett in Black Panther: Wakanda Forever

Best Original Screenplay — Everything Everywhere All At Once

Best Adapted Screenplay — Women Talking

Best Animated Feature Film — Marcel The Shell With Shoes On

Best International Feature Film — All Quiet On The Western Front

Best Documentary Feature — Nalvany

Best Documentary Short Subject — Stranger At The Gate

Best Live Action Short Film — The Red Suitcase

Best Animated Short Film — My Year of Dicks

Best Original Score — The Banshees of Inisherin

Best Original Song — Naatu Naatu from RRR

Best Sound — Top Gun: Maverick

Best Production Design — Babylon

Best Cinematography — Elvis

Best Makeup and Hairstyling — The Whale

Best Costume Design — Babylon

Best Film Editing — Top Gun: Maverick

Best Visual Effects — Avatar: The Way of Water

We’ll see how accurate I am tomorrow!

Retro Television Reviews: California Dreams 4.7 “Secret Admirer” and 4.8 “Old”

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing California Dreams, which ran on NBC from 1992 to 1996.  The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

This week, Sly breaks hearts and hurts feelings!  And maybe he learns a lesson.

Episode 4.7 “Secret Admirer”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 4th, 1995)

This episode opens in Pacific Coast High’s state-of-the-art computer lab!

After accidentally deleting a love poem that Mark has spent weeks working on, Sly spots a student named Lynn awkwardly asking people to come to her sweet sixteen party.  Realizing that Lynn comes from a wealthy family, Sly decides that the Dreams have to play that party!  The only problem is that Sly has known Lynn since kindergarten and he’s spent that entire time making fun of her weight.  Lynn cannot stand Sly.

Can you feel the hatred?

Sly, having learned nothing from being put on trial last week, steals one of Mark’s love poems and slips it into Lynn’s locker. “Wow, a secret admirer,” Lynn says.  Then Sly pops up and starts trying to flirt with her.  At first, Lynn refuses to believe that Sly is being serious but, slowly, he wins her over.  And what happens here is kind of interesting.  As Sly eventually figures out, it’s not that Lynn believes him as much as she wants to believe him because she has absolutely no self-esteem.  Even after Lynn hires the Dreams and pays them $2,000, Sly still feels guilty.  He feels so guilty that he gives up the money.

This was not the first Peter Engel-produced show to figure its lead character going out with a someone who weighed a bit more than Tiffani-Amber Thiessen.  Saved By The Bell actually used that plot a few times.  On Saved By The Bell, Zack got sold in a date auction to a girl who wasn’t his type and the audience screamed in shock.  But this episode of California Dreams is different from Saved By The Bell in that it is more on the side of the girl than on the guy pretending to like her.  Sly does a terrible thing and, when he realizes it, Michael Cade does such a good job of playing Sly’s guilt that the viewer really does feel like Sly is probably never going to forgive himself.

That’s a good thing.  That said, this still isn’t a particularly strong episode.  The actress playing Lynn delivers all of her lines in the same flat manner and there’s a rather annoying B-plot about everyone thinking that Mark’s love poem was written for them.  (That’s another plot that was used and reused on Saved By The Bell.)  Sly learned a lesson about making fun of people but I doubt it will last….

Episode 4.8 “Old”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 11th, 1995)

Sly makes fun of a bunch old people and then has a dream where he’s old and all the members of the band make fun of him!  He then wakes up and visits an old man in the hospital.  So, basically, Sly learned the same lesson that he should have learned in the last episode and in the episode before that.  Some people just don’t ever learn!

That said, by the time this episode aired, Michael Cade had really grown as an actor and he’s convincing as both an old man and an obnoxious teenager.

Next week, in another story borrowed from Saved By The Bell, Tony gets an operation!  The fun never ends when you’re surrounded by surf dudes with attitude and feeling mellow.

Live Tweet Alert: Watch Friday the 13th with #ScarySocial


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, for #ScarySocial, I will be hosting 1980’s Friday the 13th!

That’s right!  With the Oscars coming up tomorrow, we’re spending tonight with a classic!

If you want to join us on Saturday night, just hop onto twitter, start the film at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag!  The film is available on Prime.  I’ll be there co-hosting and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well.  It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.

And don’t watch alone!

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Raoul Walsh Edition

4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

126 years ago today, film director Raoul Walsh was born in New York City.  He started out as an actor and a second unit director, learning how to make films under the tutelage of D.W. Griffith.  He made his directorial debut in 1915 with Regeneration, which is considered to be the first gangster film.  Refusing to sidelined after losing an eye in an auto accident, Walsh continued to direct and his career stretched from the silent era all the way to the mid-60s.  Walsh directed westerns, war films, and gangster films.  He was a master of tough but sometimes quirky action films.  Martin Scorsese continues to cite Walsh as being an influence on his own work.

Today. we pay tribute to Raoul Walsh with….

4 Shots From 4 Raoul Walsh Films

The Big Trail (1930, dir by Raoul Walsh, DP: Lucian Andriot and Arthur Edeson)

The Roaring Twenties (1939, dir by Raoul Walsh, DP: Ernest Haller)

Gentleman Jim (1942, dir by Raoul Walsh, DP: Sidney Hickox)

White Heat (1949, dir by Raoul Walsh, DP: Sidney Hickox)

Music Video of the Day: Always Remember Us This Way by Lady Gaga (2018, dir by Bradley Cooper)


To be honest, I think the Oscars pretty much peaked when Bradley Cooper and Lay Gaga performed on stage together.  They should have just ended the whole thing there because that was the last great Oscar moment.  Instead, the Oscars continued and subsequent years so not only the COVID Oscars but also The Slap Oscars.  Luckily, for the stars of A Star Is Born, we’ll always remember them this way.