Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 1.16 “The Count”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

It’s time to go under the knife in Boston.

Episode 1.16 “The Count”

(Dir by Kevin Hooks, originally aired March 8th, 1983)

Harold Beaumont (Michael Halsey), an adult film actor better known as The Count, has checked into St. Eligius.  Of course, Dr. Samuels immediately recognizes him because Samuels is obsessed with porn.  Dr. Annie Cavanero does not recognize him but, once she learns what he does for a living, she has to tell him that she finds his work to be offensive because Dr. Cavanero’s entire personality pretty much revolves around getting offended by stuff.

It’s not much of a plot.  There’s a process server (William G. Schilling) who wants to serve the Count with a courts summons so Samuels and Cavanero help the Count hide and disguise his identity.  It’s silly and dumb story that involves the two of the least likable members of the show’s regular cast.

Meanwhile, Dr. Wendy Armstrong (Kim Miyori) comes to suspect that one of the hospital’s heart surgeons, Dr. Larry Andrews (Peter Michael Goetz), is giving pacemakers to people who don’t actually need them.  She takes her concerns to Dr. Craig.  Craig, an old friend of Dr. Andrews, is initially dismissive but he later confronts Dr. Andrews and finds out that Armstrong was correct.  Dr. Andrews explains that it takes a lot of money to fund his lifestyle.  This story was an improvement over the Count but it perhaps would have had more power if it had been someone like Dr. Ehrlich who suspected that Dr. Andrews was giving people pacemakers that they don’t need.  Ehrlich actually has a complicated relationship with Dr. Craig and his own less-than-stellar record as a resident would have added some ambiguity to storyline.  Dr. Armstrong, on the other hand, has been portrayed as being hypercompetent and a bit self-righteous and, if we’re going to be honest, she’s kind of a boring character.

Speaking of Dr. Ehrlich, he is getting fed up with living with Fiscus.  Howie Mandel is driving someone crazy?  Who could have seen that coming?

This week’s episode was pretty forgettable.  The story involving Dr. Andrews had potential but choosing to make the show’s least interesting characters the center of an entire episode was a decision that really didn’t pay off.

March True Crime: The Hunt For The Unicorn Killer (dir by William A. Graham)


Who started Earth Day?

There are a lot of names that get mentioned.  Some people give all the credit to U.S. Senator Gaylord Nelson of Wisconsin, who was  an environmentalist before it was trendy and who proposed a day-long “teach-in” in 1970.  (According to Norman Mailer, Hunter Thompson, and Gary Hart, Gaylord Nelson was also George McGovern’s personal pick for his running mate in 1972 but ultimately, Nelson didn’t get the spot because it was felt people would make fun of his first name.  Considering how things went with Thomas Eagleton, one imagines that McGovern probably ended up wishing he had the courage to go with his first instinct.)  A peace activist named John McConnell also proposed the idea of an Earth Day in 1969 but there’s some debate whether his proposed Earth Day became the actual Earth Day.  Like all things, many people have taken credit for the idea behind Earth Day.

Ira Einhorn was one of those people.  A prominent member of Pennsylvania’s counter-culture, Einhorn was a self-styled New Age environmentalist and he did speak at the first Earth Day event in Philadelphia.  Einhorn went on to become a prominent guru, providing his services to several corporations that were looking to shake off their stodgy image.  He led protests against nuclear energy.  He wrote articles about CIA duplicity.  He was, for a while, a popular figure and, due to his last name, he was nicknamed “The Unicorn.”  He always claimed that he was instrumental in starting Earth Day but the organizers behind the event have always been quick to say that he had little do with it.

It’s understandable that the people behind Earth Day would rather not be associated with Ira Einhorn.  Einhorn presented himself as being a quirky, fun-loving hippie but, in private, he was known for having both a violent temper and a misogynistic streak.  In 1977, Einhorn’s ex-girlfriend, Texas-born Holly Maddux, disappeared.  In 1979, her mummified remains were found in a box that Einhorn kept in his closet.  Arrested for her murder and defended in court by future U.S. Sen. Arlen Specter, Einhorn claimed that he was innocent and that he had no idea how Holly Maddux ended up in his closet.  (He suggested the CIA might be responsible.)  With the help of his wealthy friends, Einhorn fled the United States and ended up in Europe.  He lived in Europe for nearly 20 years until he was finally arrested in France.  Einhorn’s claim that he was being framed for his anti-nuclear advocacy found a sympathetic audience amongst certain members of the French intellectual community.  Eventually, though, Ira Einhorn was extradited to Pennsylvania.  He spent the rest of his life in prison, eventually dying in 2020.  To the end, he had his supporters despite the fact that he was clearly guilty.

Made for television in 1999, The Hunt For The Unicorn Killer tells the story of Ira (Kevin Anderson), Holly (a pre-Mulholland Drive Naomi Watts), and Holly’s father, Fred (Tom Skerritt).  It does a good job of telling the disturbing story of Ira Einhorn and it features good performances from its main stars.  Tom Skerritt especially does a good job as a father determined to get justice for his daughter.  The film shows how so many of Ira’s friends rationalized his actions, not wanting to admit that their nostalgia for the 60s and the counterculture was blinding them to the monster in their midst. It’s a portrait of how one evil man was able to take advantage of the idealism of others.

The Hunt For The Unicorn Killer‘s original running time was 163 minutes and it was aired over two nights.  It was later edited down to 90 minutes for syndication.  The uncut version is available on YouTube and that’s definitely the one to see.

RUTHLESS PEOPLE (1986) – In remembrance of Jim Abrahams


It made me sad when I saw that writer/director Jim Abrahams had passed away on November 26, 2024 at 80 years of age. Growing up in the 1980’s, Mr. Abrahams is responsible for some of my favorite comedies. AIRPLANE, TOP SECRET, and THE NAKED GUN would not exist without Jim Abrahams. As much as I love all of those movies, my personal favorite film that Jim Abrahams co-directed is RUTHLESS PEOPLE. I remember when our family rented this film and watched it in the ‘80’s. We thought it was so funny. I specifically remember my mom laughing out loud on multiple occasions as the ridiculous scenario played out. That was a fun movie night in the Crain household. 

RUTHLESS PEOPLE is about a rich businessman named Sam Stone (Danny DeVito) who truly hates his wife Barbara (Bette Midler), and hatches a plan to kill her so he can inherit her money. Unfortunately he runs into a couple of problems. First, his mistress Carol (Anita Morris) knows about the plan, so she and her dimwitted boy toy Earl (Bill Pullman) want to film Sam dumping his wife’s body so they can blackmail him for millions. Second, before Sam can execute his plan, Barbara is kidnapped and held for a ransom of $500,000 by Ken and Sandy Kressler (Judge Reinhold and Helen Slater). It seems that Sam stole Sandy’s idea for the spandex miniskirt, screwed them out of millions with a handshake deal, and then kept the money for himself. This seems like an answer to prayer at first for Sam because they threaten to kill Barbara if he doesn’t meet their needs or if he calls the police or the media. After saying no to their demands, and then immediately calling the police and the news, Sam realizes that they don’t want to kill her when they keep coming back with lower demands. Sandy tells Barbara that Sam refuses to pay even $10,000 for her safe return. Eventually the kidnappers and Barbara join together to try to take the unfaithful and unethical Sam for everything he’s worth!! 

RUTHLESS PEOPLE is one of my favorite comedies of the 1980’s. It has such a great cast. Danny DeVito and Bill Pullman are especially hilarious and have some of the film’s best lines. At the time the movie came out in 1986, DeVito was already established as a master of comedy, so Pullman’s performance as Earl, the dumbass Sonny Crockett wannabe, was the real revelation to me. Pullman made his film debut in RUTHLESS PEOPLE, and I never see him to this day that I don’t think of his character Earl’s excitement over the prospect of his newfound blackmail money:

“And then we’re off, to Haiti!”

“It’s Tahiti, you moron!”

One of the most interesting things about RUTHLESS PEOPLE is just how different it is from the directing trio’s (Zucker / Abrahams / Zucker) other popular films like THE KENTUCKY FRIED MOVIE and AIRPLANE. Those films are based on non-stop visual and verbal gags. I love those films, but this is quite different. The comedy of RUTHLESS PEOPLE is based on the story itself, which is a comedy of confusion, coincidence, and character. I know it’s awesome because I still think of the film often. “Give the bag to bozo” and “a little poke in the whiskers” are phrases I’ll remember up to the point I go to my grave. 

Even though the film is almost 40 years old, if you’re looking for a laugh, I don’t think you can do much better than RUTHLESS PEOPLE.