Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 5.9 “Choices”

Posted on February 26, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Highway to Heaven, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, Jonathan and Mark get into the detective business.

Episode 5.9 “Choices”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on June 30th, 1989)

Working as private investigators, Mark and Jonathan are approached by a Vietnamese couple who are looking for the two sons that they gave up for adoption many years ago. They gave the boys up so that they could escape Vietnam and live in America, safe from communism. Now, the father (Dr. Haing S. Ngor) wants to bring his sons back to Singapore, despite the fact that both of them have been adopted by good people and the oldest has been accepted to a prestigious college.

This was an above average episode of Highway to Heaven. It was undoubtedly heavy-handed and there were more than a few minutes where the dialogue was a bit too spot-on for its own good. But ultimately, the episode was so earnest and heartfelt that the viewer couldn’t help but forgive the show’s flaws. This particular episode was very well-acted, especially by Dr. Haing S. Ngor. A Cambodian who lost most of his family after the Khmer Rogue came to power and attempted to return the country to “Year Zero” by killing off anyone who was considered to be too educated or cosmopolitan, Dr. Ngor survived by disguising the fact that he was an educated doctor. After the fall of the Khmer Rogue, Ngor made his way to Thailand and eventually to America. He won an Oscar for playing a character who suffered much as he suffered in The Killing Fields (a film about communist atrocities that has the gall to unironically include John Lennon’s Imagine on the soundtrack). In this episode, Ngor gives a strong performance as a stubborn man who struggles with the fact that his sons have grown up in his absence. Tragically, seven years after this episode aired, Dr. Ngor was murdered in his driveway. Though a group of gang members were arrested and convicted of his murder, it’s always been known that his murder was ordered by Pol Pot, the leader of the Khmer Rogue.

The final season of Highway to Heaven has been uneven but this was a good episode.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 5.8 “Goodbye, Mr. Zelinka”

Posted on February 19, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, it’s time for yet another student protest.

Episode 5.8 “Goodbye, Mr. Zelinka”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on June 23rd, 1989)

The students at Lincoln High are upset to learn that beloved English teacher Mr. Zelinka (Lew Ayres) is going to have to retire because he’s reached the mandatory age of 70. The school’s new maintenance workers — Jonathan Smith and Mark Gordon — suggest that they should all conduct a walk-out to demand that Zelinka be allowed to keep his job. The evil school board president (James Karen) says that Zelinka can stay if he takes and passes an exam. However, the exam is rigged for Zelinka to fail. Jonathan uses “the stuff” to make sure that Zelinka not only passes but that he also gets the highest score ever. In the past, Jonathan always refused to use “the stuff” to help people cheat. Instead, Jonathan would have shown the school board president the error of his ways. But, for this episode, Jonathan rigs the rigged exam and the villain is left in power so that he can presumably continue to make Mr. Zelinka’s life miserable.

I did not like this episode. Yeah, it’s heart was in the right place but the entire school walking about in support of Mr, Zelinka just felt kind of silly. I mean, did every student at the school have Mr. Zelinka for English? What did everyone’s parents think about the protest? If Mr. Zelinka had been a compelling character, may be I would have felt differently but Mr. Zelinka was instead a pretty passive character and I have to admit that I wondered about all the other good teachers who had been forced to retire at 70. Why didn’t Jonathan show up to help any of them out? What made Mr. Zelinka so special? It didn’t help that Lew Ayres was 80 years old when he played Mr. Zelinka and that he looked and sounded even older. The obviously frail Ayres comes across as someone who maybe does need to retire.

I’ve sat through a lot of Highway to Heaven episodes about clean-cut teenagers walking out of class so that they can protest injustice. Highway to Heaven was a very earnest show and that was one of the things that made it likable. But, by the fifth season, Highway to Heaven‘s formula was a bit less effective than it had been in the past. This is an episode just just seems to be going through the motions. This is also the rare Highway to Heaven episode in which I wanted someone to tell Jonathan and Mark to just mind their own business.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 5.7 “The Squeaky Wheel”

Posted on February 12, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Jonathan and Mark help out a vet.

Episode 5.7 “The Squeaky Wheel”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on June 16th, 1989)

Jonathan and Mark attempt to turn Wayne Secret (Robert David Hall) into a disability activist. Having lost his legs in Vietnam, Wayne wants to live a quiet life with his wife (Deborah Benson) but, while staying at a recently renovated hotel, he is woken up by a fire alarm. With the the elevators not working and no ramps, Wayne is forced to depend on the kindness of a stranger who carries him down a flight of stairs. The fire turns out to be a false alarm but the experience leads to Wayne protesting the fact that the hotel is not wheelchair accessible.

The owner of the hotel not only agrees to make changes to the building but he also offers Wayne a job. Things are looking up for Wayne! But, when a gang of young men harass him and his wife at a drive-in movie, Wayne snaps. He buys an Uzi and then heads down to their clubhouse to take them out. Luckily, Jonathan appears and talks Wayne out of becoming a mass murderer. Wayne goes on to receive a “man of the year” award while Jonathan beats up the leader of the gang.

This episode felt very familiar. In the past, this episode would have featured Mark’s brother-in-law, Scotty. Instead, it features Wayne, who is not a particularly compelling character. I think that this episode would have worked if it had just focused on Wayne advocating for wheelchair accessible buildings. I also think it would have worked if it had just focused on Wayne’s anger to the gang and his struggle to let go of his bitterness over his war experiences. Unfortunately, trying to cram both those storylines into one 45-minute show led to the whole thing feeling half-baked.

There was one poignant scene in this episode. It opened with Mark and Jonathan visiting the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Mark got excited when he came across Michael Landon’s star. “Never heard of him,” Jonathan shrugged. “I forget you’ve been dead for forty years,” Mark replies. It captured Jonathan and Mark’s friendship, which was always been one of the more underrated aspects of Highway to Heaven. That said, it was also a bit of a sad scene as the episode itself aired a day after the death of Victor French and Landon himself would pass away nearly two years later.

So, I Watched Choices (1981, Dir. by Silvio Narizzano)

Posted on February 8, 2026 by Dazzling Erin

John Carluccio (Paul Carafotes) is the star running back on his high school football team until the district’s new chief doctor (Dennis Patrick) rules that John can no longer play because he’s partially deaf and wears a hearing aid. Coach Rizzo (Val Avery) protests but John is off the team. John stops hanging out with his squeaky clean best friend (William R. Moses) and instead becomes friends with the school delinquent (Stephen Nichols). John starts smoking pot and gets a bad attitude. Whenever anyone tries to help him or suggests that he can live a productive life even without football, John gets angry. Can his new girlfriend (Demi Moore) turn his life around?

I really wanted to feel bad for John and cheer him on as he fought to be allowed to play football but he was such a mopey character that it was hard. He acted like the rest of the team should have refused to play until he was allowed to rejoin them. It didn’t help that the new running back was just as good as John ever was. Eventually, John discovered that he loved music and Demi Moore but even all of that felt like it came out of nowhere. I know a lot of people who have had setbacks as bad as John’s who managed to get through them without treating everyone around them terribly.

Demi Moore is the big “name” here but she’s only in the movie for a few minutes. I recognized a few of the other actors. William R. Moses later played Ken Malansky in the Perry Mason movies and Stephen Nichols will always be Patch on Days of our Lives.

If you’re looking for football action, you won’t find it here. My choice, if I could do it again? Don’t watch.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 5.6 “The Source”

Posted on February 5, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Jonathan and Mark are once again teaching high school.

Episode 5.6 “The Source”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on June 9th, 1989)

This week, Jonathan and Mark are back in high school …. again!

This time, Mark is teaching sex ed. (Ha ha, the Boss sure does love embarrassing Mark!) Meanwhile, Jonathan is the faculty advisor to the school newspaper. When a school bus crashes, two enterprising student journalists — Doug (Scott Fults) and Colin (Andy Lauer) — decide that they’re going to get to the bottom of what happened. All the evidence shows that it was just a freak accident and that bus driver Larry Nichols (Dack Rambo) is not to blame. However, a student on the bus named Ellen (Kim Walker) tells Doug and Colin that, before the crash, Larry was flirting with her and not watching the road. After Doug and Colin agree to protect Ellen’s identity, they write a story about Larry, the adult bus driver who was too busy flirting with an underage girl to take that curve.

Doug and Colin think that they’re going to win a Pulitzer but Jonathan says, “Hold on, we can’t publish this!” However, the school’s principal (Alan Fudge) disagrees because Colin just happens to be his son. The story is published and Larry loses his job. Doug and Colin are feeling pretty proud of themselves but then they just happen to come across Ellen’s notebook in the school’s copy room. (Jonathan, using “the Stuff,” switched out his notebook for Ellen’s.) Doug and Colin read the notebook and discover that Ellen has a crush on Larry and that Ellen lied about him flirting with her.

Doug and Colin retract the story and learn a lesson about journalistic responsibility. Ellen, even though Colin and Doug continue to protect her identity, leaves with Jonathan so that she can apologize to Larry face-to-face. (We don’t actually see the apology. I have a feeling that it probably didn’t go well.) As the episode ends, two women look at the newspaper and agree that, retraction or no retraction, Larry was definitely guilty. We then hear Jonathan’s voice telling us that the first amendment is too important to be abused.

That’s an important message and a timely one. Watching this episode, it was hard not to consider that, for the past few weeks, people in this country have been arguing about whether or not the first amendment applies more to a self-employed YouTuber who stormed a church service or the people in the church who were worshipping at the time. There’s a lot of earnest sincerity to be found in this episode of Highway to Heaven but, that said, the execution is pretty heavy-handed. Even by the standards of this show, there’s not much subtlety to be found here.

An even bigger problem is that this episode can’t seem to decide whether Ellen is meant to be a shy teenager who made a mistake or a full-blown sociopath. I think this episode would have worked better if Colin and Doug heard rumors that they reported as fact as opposed to Ellen just flat-out lying to them. Once Ellen lies, it’s hard not to feel that the focus should be less on Colin and Doug learning a lesson and more on Ellen getting some sort of psychiatric help.

This episode was typical of season 5. It was sincere but just a bit too on-the-nose.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 4.24 “The Whole Nine Yards”

Posted on December 4, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Today, season 4 comes to a close with an episode about two football teams, one struggling and one not. Care to guess which team is going to win the big game?

Episode 4.24 “The Whole Nine Yards”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on April 27th, 1988)

Charlie DuBoise (Dinah Lacey) is a twelve year-old girl who wants to play football. Vince Diller (Beau Starr) is the chauvinistic coach who refuses to allow Charlie to join his team, despite the fact that she can catch and she’s even faster then his son, quarterback Ricky Diller (Chad Allen). Instead, Charlie joins another team, the 0-5 Minnows. Who is the new coach of the Minnows? Mark Gordon, of course!

Ricky has a hard time accepting that a girl beat him in a race and, when Charlie approaches him in a totally 80s arcade, a fight breaks out. Luckily, Jonathan is there to break it up. Ricky apologizes to Charlie while Charlie has a gigantic wad of Kleenex stuck up her nose. The scene goes on for a while and Charlie never removes the Kleenex. It was awkward to watch. Seriously, that’s what nampons are for.

Eventually, Ricky gets sick of Vince and his win-at-all-costs mentality. Ricky talks back to his father and gets kicked off the team. Ricky joins the Minnows and he and Charlie defeat Vince’s team in the big game. Vince comes to realize that the game should be about fun and Ricky and Charlie go to the school dance together.

And so ends season 4 of Highway to Heaven. Shows about girls who want to play football are always weird to me because I’m a girl and I can’t ever think of circumstances in which I would want to play football. But I do think that if Charlie wants to get a head start on getting the concussions that will ruin her adult life, she should certainly be allowed to do so. The main problem with this episode was that Vince was such an ogre and such a terrible father that the show’s happy ending felt false. His son joined another team and destroyed Vince’s undefeated record. The episode ends with Vince saying he’s proud of his son but Vince has been such a monster that his words sound hollow. I’m kind of worried about what’s going to happen when Ricky goes home. Instead of putting together a football game, Jonathan and Mark should have been calling Child Protective Services.

This is my final episode of Highway to Heaven for 2025. Retro Television Reviews will be taking a break for the holidays but this feature will return! On January 8th, 2026, we’ll start our look at the final season of Highway to Heaven.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 4.23 “Heaven Nose, Mr. Smith”

Posted on November 27, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week …. oh, where to begin?

Episode 4.23 “Heaven Nose, Mr. Smith”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on March 30th, 1988)

This episode was bad.

How bad?

Let me count the ways.

Jonathan is driving the car, for once. He and Mark are going to get some time off. Suddenly, a very shrill alarm goes off. Jonathan says that he has to go up to Heaven to meet with the never-before mentioned Sycopomp, who is in charge of handing out angel assignments. Jonathan vanishes, leaving the car without a driver. Mark nearly crashes before he gets control of the wheel.
How have we gone for four seasons without the alarm going off earlier?
Since when has Jonathan gotten assignments from anyone other than The Boss?
Does Jonathan not realize Mark could have been killed as a result of him suddenly vanishing?
The Sycopomp is played by Bob Hope. Yes, the comedian Bob Hope. Bob Hope was 85 when he appeared in this episode and, not surprisingly, he doesn’t do much. In fact, he does so little that you have to wonder why it was necessary to have the character at all.
The Sycopomp explains that the Boss has computerized Heaven — “Modern technology,” he says, with a shrug. Why would the Boss do that since the Boss is God and God knows everything and can do anything?
The computers have malfunctioned. How could a computer built by God malfunction?
As a result of the computer malfunction, an angel named Max (Bill Macy) has been assigned to help fix the marriage of Stanley (John Pleshette) and Constance (Murphy Cross). The problem is that Max is Stanley’s deceased father and he’s always disliked Constance so, instead of helping Stanley and Constance, he’s instead trying to get Stanley to leave Constance for his childhood girlfriend, Nel (Anna Stuart).
What? Okay, Jonathan got mad and yelled at the Boss a few episodes ago and he was immediately stripped of his powers. Yet somehow, Max is able to do a lot worse without any sort of punishment.
Jonathan and Mark are sent to stop Max. They meet Stanley and Constance. While Constance’s main flaw is that she has a terrible hair style, Stanley is a total wimp who has never finished anything in his life. Stanley is so unlikable that it’s hard not to feel that Constance would be better off without him.
Jonathan and Max both reveal themselves to be angels to Stanley. Yeah, Jonathan has revealed himself to be an angel in the past but it still feels like lazy writing.
From out of nowhere, wimpy, middle-aged Stanley is revealed to be a fast runner.
Jonathan and Max bully Stanley into entering a marathon.
Stanley nearly dies during the marathon but makes it to the end. He comes in last place but Constance doesn’t care. What matters is that he finished something! And it looks like the marriage has been saved but Stanley is so sweaty and out-of-breath that one still expects him to drop dead right there.
Sara (Patti Karr), Max’s wife, is sent down as an angel as well. She doesn’t accomplish anything but she’s sent down nonetheless.
Why would someone as self-centered as Max be made an angel in the first place?
With the assignment completed, everyone leaves. Constance and Stanley are back together! Except, earlier, we were told that Constance and Stanley’s marriage was in trouble because Constance wanted children and Stanley didn’t. That storyline is never resolved. In fact, it’s just kind of dropped.
Other than Jonathan and Mark, there are no likable people in this episode. This episode tires to mix comedy and drama and it just doesn’t work.

This just wasn’t a good episode. The story just feels unfinished.

Next week, season 4 comes to a close!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 4.22 “A Dolphin Song For Lee, Part 2”

Posted on November 20, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Lee dies.

Episode 4.22 “A Dolphin Song For Lee Part 2”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on March 23rd, 1988)

Remember how, last week, Lee (Bess Meyer) was told that her cancer had gone into remission and she was going to live? Well, this week, the cancer comes back and Lee dies after a month.

What a depressing episode!

Lee gets to do a lot in that month. She goes out on a boat and saves a group of dolphins from some hunters. She testified before Congress and, through emotional blackmail, gets them to pass a bill protecting the dolphins. She swims with a dolphin! And then she dies and its suggested that she’s been reborn as a dolphin.

Normally, I would complain about how shamelessly manipulative this all is but you know what? I like dolphins. I’ll forgive a lot when it comes to dolphins.

And, also, I am going to give some credit where is credit is due. Not every story has a happy ending. Sometimes, people die. It’s not fair but it happens. Highway to Heaven admitted that in this episode and I was in tears by the end of it.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 4.21 “A Dolphin Song For Lee: Part One”

Posted on November 6, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Mark finally gets the stuff.

Episode 4.21 “A Dolphin Song For Lee: Part One”

(Dir by Michael Landon, March 9th, 1988)

After he complains for the hundredth time about not having “the stuff,” Mark finally gets the boss’s attention in this episode. Suddenly, Mark is the one who doesn’t need to eat, who knows where to go for the assignment, and who instinctively realizes that the young woman they’ve been assigned to help — Lee (Bess Meyer) — desperately needs a bone marrow transplant. Meanwhile, Jonathan becomes human yet again.

That’s not a bad idea for a story, though it’s hard not to notice that this is the second time that Jonathan’s gone from being an angel to being mortal during season four. One would think that either Jonathan or Mark would have noted this fact but neither one does. Maintaining continuity has not been season four’s strong point.

As for the story itself, it’s pretty simple but then again, it’s only Part 1 of a two-parter. Lee refuses to get the bone marrow transplant because she fears her parents won’t be able to afford it. Using “the stuff,” Mark essentially commands a local news producer to do a story on Lee and her need for a transplant. In a scene that feels like a fantasy today, we see people apparently all across the country watching the news story on Lee. One guy in a bar yells at everyone to be quiet so he can hear the story. It feels incredibly dated and almost too earnest for its own good, if just because it’s hard to imagine people actually sitting around the TV and watching a network newscast nowadays. (It’s also hard not to wonder if Mark essentially zapping the producer and taking over his mind is a good example of what the Boss wants done with the stuff. That’s not something that Jonathan has ever done, even though it would have made things a lot simpler.)

People across the country donate money so that Lee can get her operation. Lee’s cancer goes into remission but the “To Be Continued” announcement at the end of the episode feels a bit ominous. If Lee’s going to be okay, why does the story need to be coninuted?

We’ll find out next week!

Horror On TV: Highway to Heaven 2.5 “The Devil and Jonathan Smith” (dir by Michael Landon)

Posted on October 31, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

On this, the final day of our annual Horrorthon, we offer you a final Horror on TV entry.

In this episode of Highway to Heaven, angel Jonathan Smith (Michael Landon) tries to defeat the devil for the soul of his friend Mark (Victor French). This episode, a true Halloween episode, originally aired on October 30th, 1985, and it features guest turns from Anthony Zerbe and the great Michael Berryman.

We hope you have had a happy Halloween!